What Money Can't Buy
by Stalpankaka
Summary: AU set in New York. After a one night stand goes a little crazy, Santana and Brittany bump into each other again... But life can never just be easy, right?
1. Chapter 1

Remember that story I told you I was working on? I'm still working on it, but this isn't it... (Author's notes to be continued at the bottom of the page)

**CHAPTER 1**

**"Down town"**

"Don't even start this with me again, Mercedes!"

"Oh please…"

"You know I'm by far the biggest lesbian up in this joint."

"Don't kid yourself, Satan."

"You want a piece of me, huh?"

"Bring it."

Santana swung her fist at Mercedes who lifted her arm to block it. Since neither really had any good fighting moves they both just held on like that for a while, pressing their underarms hard against each other. Santana realized she had another hand available and grabbed a fistful of Mercedes weave.

"Bitch." Was Mercedes response and she pushed Santana away in reflex, before realizing that she'd be tumbling with her, as Santana refused to let go of her hair. Both girls shrieked and grunted, clenching hard at whatever body part or piece of clothing they could reach.

"Stop the violence." A tall, female police officer spoke in an authoritative manner. Where the hell did she come from? Both took a pause and looked at the woman who said it. At the same time they both saw an opportunity as the other was distracted, and soon the fight was in full motion again.

"Hey, hey, hey!" The officer said and stepped between them. Mercedes calmed down pretty soon and walked back to the group of friends by the bar. Santana, on the other hand, was still boiling with rage and attempted to attack Mercedes from behind.

"That's enough!" The police woman continued and grabbed Santana's whole body and carried her a few feet, pressing her up against the nearest wall. When Santana no longer struggled, the strong cop let go off her.

"Could you please tell me what that was all about?" She asked without letting Santana out of her sight.

"We were, uhm, sort of… arguing about which one of us is the biggest lesbo…" Santana said a little embarrassed since it sounded so silly to say it out loud. The police officer chuckled. She looked into Santana's deep brown eyes and Santana immediately felt a tingle in her lady parts as she stared back into the blue ones before her.

"Miss, are you drunk?"

Santana didn't answer right away since she was still lost the blue oceans that were the police woman's eyes.

"Miss, have you been drinking?" She tried again.

"This is a bar after all…" Santana shrugged and found the officer's blue eyes again.

"Okay, miss…?" The police dragged out the 's' indicating she wanted Santana to fill in her name.

"Lopez. Santana"

"Ms. Lopez, I'm gonna have to take you downtown."

"Seriously?" Santana couldn't believe this shit. She tried to give the officer a pleading look but she was pretty sure she just looked pissed off. Santana gasped for air when the other woman stepped closer; leaving their lips dangerously close.

"Uh-huh." The officer breathed against her face.

"Unless you want me to go down…" The woman's blue eyes wandered lower, pausing at Santana's lips, cleavage and crotch in a very suggestive manner.

"… on you." She finished in Santana's ear, causing her to quiver.

"My place is just around the corner." Santana challenged, feeling drunk and cocky as she raised an eyebrow.

"My shift's up in five." The officer accepted without taking her eyes off Santana's plump lips.

"Meet you out front?"

They both nodded and then turned to walk in opposite directions.

* * *

><p>Santana struggled to get the key in the keyhole. She had sobered up pretty fast but she was still a little tipsy and there was a sexy cop pressing up against her, breathing in her neck with hands wandering up and down her body. She grunted in frustration.<p>

"Get it open already." The officer said eagerly, taking a mouthful of Santana's neck.

"I'm tryi…" She started to respond but interrupted herself when the key slid in the hole. She turned it and pushed the door open.

"Finally." The officer exhaled; stepping inside and dragging Santana with her, pushing her up against the wall and kissing her neck vigorously. Santana reached her hand out and managed to nudge the door shut. She let her own hands roam over the other woman's body but her uniform was in way and Santana couldn't feel anything other than the thick clothing.

Feeling how she was really not exposed at all, Santana suddenly felt more vulnerable. She didn't know what the night of dancing had done to her hair and make-up and she suddenly became very aware of the alcohol on her breath.

"Hey, uhm…?" Santana stopped herself, realizing she didn't know the other woman's name.

"Brittany." She answered between breaths while also licking Santana's earlobe.

"Right, Brittany. I'm just gonna freshen up." Santana said and felt Brittany shrug back in response. Not wanting to discourage her Santana sucked on Brittany's bottom lip for a second before skipping off. Brittany nodded even though Santana had already walked into what Brittany assumed was the bathroom. She took her big jacket off and hung it on a hanger.

She proceeded to take a little look around in the apartment. The place was very tidy. Brittany was almost afraid to move around in fear of messing something up. She walked into the living room and caught her eye on one of the walls where a very symmetrical line of photos hung. In most of the frames she saw her late night rendevouz with a petite ginger woman. They were smiling and hugging or holding hands in most of them. She was beginning to think that Santana was already committed to someone else. Is that why she rushed into the bathroom?

When Santana returned she found Brittany eyeing the pictures hanging on the wall.

"That's my room mate." Santana said carefully to not startle Brittany

"And best friend." She quickly continued because she wanted to explain why there were so many pictures of them together and clarify that they were not a couple.

"Her name is Emma." She added before deciding to not say anything else until she had gotten a response. When Brittany turned around she had a different look on her face than when Santana had left her. It was less 'horny teenager' and more 'sexy cop'. Santana was glad she had dolled herself up a bit again, fixed the hair and wiped some smudged mascara away from under her eyes. She had brushed her teeth too, but without toothpaste. She didn't want to taste all minty because that would be too obvious.

"Is she here?" Brittany wanted to know after a moment of silence.

"No, she's in Ohio visiting her pa…" Santana started ranting but stopped herself midsentence. She wanted to kick herself, she had to stop blubbering or Brittany would know how nervous she was. "… no." She said again. The blue eyed woman smiled. She had moved a lot closer without Santana even noticing.

"Good." Brittany whispered seductively, leaning in closer. Santana reached her hands out to pull Brittany close, but she managed to stop both of Santana's hands before they had even made it halfway through the air.

"Ah-ah-ah!" Brittany said and shook her head. "Assaulting an officer is a serious offence." Santana gave her a questioning look but Brittany just smirked back.

"Hands on the wall. Legs apart." Brittany dominated. Santana was caught off guard but she was more than happy to oblige. She loves role playing. This was role playing, right? Santana turned around and pressed her palms against the white wall.

"Wider." Brittany ordered and tapped between Santana's legs until she was satisfied with how far apart they were. From behind and in silence she let her hands roam Santana's body. Following the curve of her waist and hip, stroking over her stomach, running up and down her arms, placing sensual squeezes on her thighs and ass, scratching her nails up the caramel skin of Santana's back and sliding over her shoulders to the front, massaging her breasts.

Santana moaned and twitched as she found it difficult to keep her position. She wanted to touch Brittany, or at least look at her. When Santana felt the hands leave her body she grunted to let Brittany know she wanted more. Soon she felt Brittany's whole body pressed up against the back of hers.

"I missed a spot, didn't I?" Brittany whispered hoarsely in her ear and Santana nodded. Then the wandering hands first moved up, forcing Santana's head to the side so she could place a lazy kiss on her lips and then moved lower over her chest and stomach.

Santana's breathing picked up when she felt a hand undo the button on her jeans. With each of her fists clenching the pants Brittany pulled them down to Santana's feet, which stepped out of them. Brittany kicked them away and then let her hand return to Santana's panting body. She stroked her fingertips over the smooth ass, feeling the warm, bare skin under them. Brittany's hand slid around to the front and toyed around the hem of the underwear for a while. Then she slipped her hand inside the thong, feeling Santana's smooth mound and moving lower to her soaked folds. Santana's sex was dripping over her fingers and Brittany smirked against Santana's neck.

"Eager much?" She said with a husky voice, lightly moving her fingers in circles over Santana.

"Hhrrmmf-uuh." Was all Santana could respond as she pressed her forehead against the wall and dug what short nails she had into the wallpaper. Brittany teased and slipped one finger inside Santana, careful to not go deeper than to her first knuckle. Santana's throbbing need was growing and her hand shot down to Brittany's, forcing it farther inside.

"Hands on the wall, Lopez." Brittany domineered and waited until a grunting Santana had her palm against the wall again.

Then she continued to move inside the wet underwear. She gently stroke up and down for a while, teasing around the entrance and flicking over the clit a few times. Everything she did was with minimal pressure causing Santana to clench her fists in frustration. She wanted more.

When she felt Brittany pull out of her underwear and heard her suck on her fingers, realising them with a popping sound, followed by a moan, Santana couldn't take it any longer. She turned around in one fast moment, her hands attacking Brittany's belt in an attempt to unbuckle it. Brittany instantly stopped her.

"You leave me no other choice." Brittany said and shook her head as if disappointed. She forcefully turned Santana around again locked her hands behind her back.

"Ms. Lopez, you are under arrest." She said and gave her a push forward. Not letting go of her tight grip on Santana's hands, she let herself be guided to the bedroom.

"You have the right to remain silent." She said with authority, letting go of the hands but twisting Santana's body around to face her.

"But I doubt you will." She finished with a smirk and pushed Santana down on the bed who watched closely as Brittany took off everything but her underwear and then joined on the bed. With Santana sitting on her ass and Brittany on her knees; she remained in power and tugged Santana's shirt over her head. She let her fingertips run over the tan skin and inside Santana's bra, feeling her nipples stiffen at being touched.

"So hot." Brittany groaned and gave both breasts a squeeze.

"I want that off." She continued, giving the bra a look and getting off the bed. She looked through her pile of discarded clothes. When she found what she was looking for, Brittany returned and was pleased to find Santana with nothing covering her upper body.

Brittany hovered over Santana, pressing the hot body under her down against the sheets with her own. Santana's hands were eager and didn't stop anywhere, feeling every bit of skin she could reach. Brittany plunged her lips into Santana's and kissed her passionately for minutes until she felt Santana's tenseness ease somewhat under her. She pulled out her hand from behind her back and grinned as Santana saw what she had in it.

"Oh, I don't know…" Santana said hesitantly, her eyes flickering between Brittany's eyes and the handcuffs in her hand. Brittany leaned down and kissed Santana again.

"Trust me." She said against lips swollen from so much kissing. She reached for one of Santana's hands and brought it up over her head. Santana nodded slightly and willingly brought the second one up to join the first.

With a reassuring smile Brittany first locked one ratchet around Santana's wrist and then let the chain wrap around a metal bar of the bed frame. She closed the last ratchet slowly, giving Santana one last chance to protest.

When in place, Santana gave the handcuffs a light tug, letting herself know she could no longer move her hands or arms. Brittany's lips moved closer to hers again, playing around in the air just above hers. Santana reached up to press against them but Brittany moved away. The game continued until Santana's restricting situation forbid her head to reach higher. With a frustrated thud she threw her head back on the pillow. Brittany grinned triumphantly at the sight of the frustrated prisoner

"This is gonna be fun." She said huskily. Santana immediately regretted letting herself agree to this.

Brittany moved lower on the bed, making sure to feel every part of the toned body on her way down. When she was almost by Santana's feet, she settled. With her knees pressing into the mattress and her hips in the air, she stretched her body towards Santana, arching her back and making sure the round mounds of her butt cheeks were clearly visible behind her lowered head, which was hovering over Santana's sex.

She brought her hands up, hooking her fingers securely in Santana's panties and pulling them down as far as she could reach while still being able to kiss the flesh of Santana's smooth pussy. After toying with her lips and tongue on, around and a little bit inside Santana's gushingly wet sex, Brittany sat herself up again. Santana groaned disappointedly at the loss of contact and opened her eyes to see why Brittany had stopped.

She found Brittany discarding of her last articles of clothing, flinging the bra across the room and tossing her soaked underwear so they landed close to Santana's face. After fumbling Santana's underwear completely off as well, Brittany began moving up Santana's body again. Her breasts and stiff nipples stroked and tickled Santana's stomach while Brittany's hand was massaging Santana's outer thigh.

When Brittany's breast reached the same height as Santana's; she pressed her body harder against the woman underneath her and rubbed her center against Santana's upper thigh and hip, leaving a wet, sticky mark.

"Fuck." Santana breathed at the sensation of Brittany's juices on her skin.

Supporting herself with one hand digging into the mattress to Santana's left, Brittany positioned herself closer to Santana's middle and tugged on the thigh she just marked. Santana took the hint and wrapped her legs around Brittany. With her hands still locked in place above her head, Santana was desperate for Brittany's touch.

She bucked her hips and moaned as her sex found friction against Brittany's. In a slow rhythm Brittany started moving between Santana's legs. Their whole centers ground together in a wet mess and the bumping of their clits caused both girls to shudder. Brittany still wanted to tease Santana so whenever she felt her tense up too hard, she came to a sudden stop, earning a more desperate groan from Santana each time.

"Please… please just… more!" Santana pleaded.

"More? You want me to fuck you harder?" Brittany questioned seductively and pressed her pelvis down on Santana

"Uh-huh! Mmm-uh, yes!" Santana nodded and furiously threw her head to the side.

"Faster? You want me to go faster?" Brittany asked while also starting to have trouble controlling her own breathing.

"Yeah, uugh, God, yes! Santana begged before biting down on the pillow. Brittany finally found herself giving in to the pleasure, picking up the pace and rubbing their sopping pussies together with more friction.

Loud moans filled the room as both were getting closer to climaxing. Brittany thrust her pelvis down harder on the other woman in a circular role of her hips and Santana jerked up in response, throwing her head back and letting out a high pitch squeak. Brittany could feel Santana's abs tighten against her own stomach.

"Uh-huh, cum for me baby." Brittany hummed in the crook of Santana's neck.

"OH GOD!" Santana called out, the cuffs rattling due to her uncontrollable twitching. With another thrust Brittany threw herself over the edge too. She moaned into Santana's ear, smelling the silky, dark hair and loving it. She kept rocking her hips against Santana but slowed down to ride it out and let both of them catch their breaths.

"So fucking amazing." Santana mumbled into the pillow.

When she found the energy to lift her head, Brittany started to place lazy kisses on Santana's collarbone and shoulder. She parted her lips and let her tongue peek out to caress the skin as she moved her head lower towards Santana's breasts. Her hands travelled up along Santana's waist and while kissing between the two boobies she took them in her hands and pressed them against the side of her face.

"Mmmm." She crooned and proceeded to wrap her lips around a taut nipple, flicking it with her tongue and sucking gently on it.

"What are you doing?" Santana murmured, still exhausted from the earth-shattering orgasm she had moments ago.

"You didn't really think we were finished, did you?" Brittany chuckled and glanced up at big brown eyes. Santana didn't answer but threw her head back as Brittany pinched one of her nipples while tending to the other with mouth again. When she had kissed and sucked the nipples to the point when they were a little swollen she massaged both breasts gently for a second before drawing her hands lower, leaving red claw-marks down Santana's stomach. Her mouth traced the marks, moving lower down Santana's heaving upper body.

"Oh fuck." Santana groaned when lips reached her sex and Brittany took as much of it as she could in her mouth. Brittany parted Santana's inner lips with her tongue and teased around her entrance until Santana couldn't control her body any longer and arched into Brittany who darted her tongue inside her. Brittany thrusted her tongue in and out, drinking down the dripping fluids, parting Santana's legs wider to taste more of her.

"Fucking sexy." She mumbled into Santana while also moving her hand to flick over the clit a few times before pressing her palm against it instead and kneading in a circular motion.

Santana tugged on the cuffs again in at attempt to move one hand into blonde locks of hair before realizing they were still locked in place. Brittany giggled at the sound, sending vibrations through Santana, causing the tickle in her lower abdomen to grow greater and her body to stiffen.

Feeling the reaction Brittany thrust her tongue deeper inside Santana and felt her walls tighten as if to crush it. She withdrew her tongue for a second and quickly pressed it inside the tight hole again. She swirled it around inside and licked in all the right places.

"Brittanyyyy!" Santana moaned loudly as she came, and flexed every muscle in her body. When she loosened her grip around Brittany's tongue, she felt a palm harder against her clit; making her orgasm again.

"Oh fuuuh-mmmhh." Santana tried to silence herself, clenching her jaw shut but she couldn't keep her noises inside. She gasped for air, shivering and shuddering against Brittany who was still licking at her pussy. Brittany sat up on her knees and wiped the back of her hand over her mouth, revealing a smirk as the hand fell back down on the mattress. She leaned forward and climbed higher on all fours, stopping when her face was over Santana's. Santana joggled her hands to signal that she wanted out of the cuffs now.

She was burning with desire to touch back. Brittany shook her head slightly and sloped her face closer to Santana's, who parted her lips, ready to taste herself. Just when their lips were about to meet; Brittany's slew in another direction ending up by Santana's ear.

"You taste awesome." She whispered slowly and then swung her whole body off Santana and got up from the bed. She took a stroll around the room, collecting her bra and then bending over Santana's face to grab her panties.

"Wait. What are you doing?" Santana asked confused, opening her eyes wider and lifting herself of the bed best she could.

"I'm leaving?" Brittany answered as if asking and pulled her pants up and buckled the belt.

"No, you can't leave." Santana stated and shook her head back and forth to emphasise it. Brittany couldn't leave, Santana wanted to do things to her. She wanted to fuck her all night and wake up tomorrow with Brittany still beside her. She wanted them to have breakfast together and then spend the whole next day fucking each other's brains out as well. Brittany was now fully clothed in her uniform and walked back to the bed, placing a lazy kiss on Santana's lips. Santana flinched when she felt something cold press against her stomach. She looked down and saw the key to the cuffs under Brittany's finger.

"I can do anything I want to, baby. I ain't the one tied up." Brittany winked and stood up. In the doorway she turned around again and caught a last look on the woman lying naked on the bed.

"Maybe we'll meet again."

* * *

><p>Okay, so that was a little... kaboom.. but that's just because this was originally just a sexy-time one shot. Now I have this whoooole storyline worked out. However - I'm still a little torn about whether or not I should continue so I thought I'd check in with you. And don't be discouraged by the sexness, it does get a lot cuter as well. I know it's holiday time and everything so I'm gonna give you some time to decide but if you want to know where this goes please review or send a PM or something. Thank you!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Hello darlings! I am loving your reviews! I have a second chapter for you and I hope you like it even if it's not as... eventful as the last one. The story is (obviously) written in 3rd person POV (if you call it that, I suck so bad at the lingo around here), but whenever Brittana are not together we follow Santana's life (most of the time anyways). Geez, I love me some parentheses!

**CHAPTER 2**

**"Encounter, most interesting"**

Santana woke to the sound of the front door to the apartment slamming shut. She tried to get off the bed but when something tugged on her wrists, holding her back, she remembered the night before.

"Emma? Help me!" She shrieked.

"Santana?" She heard the woman call back.

"Help me!" Santana repeated, irritated that her friend didn't immediately rush to her aid. She heard steps coming closer and then saw her bedroom door swing open.

"Oh Lord!" Emma exclaimed and turned her back to her naked friend. "Santana, you're very exposed." She continued calmly without turning her head to look again.

"It's nothing you haven't seen before. Please just help me, I can't feel my arms." Santana begged. Emma hesitantly turned back around, careful to not look anywhere but in Santana's eyes.

"How am I supposed to open those?" Emma questioned, throwing a glance at the cuffs and the red marks they had left around Santana's wrists.

"There should be a key here somewhere…" Santana stated, remembering that Brittany had left one. She looked around the room and Emma pretended to do the same although she really just looked from her left foot to her right and then back again.

"There it is." Santana said when she saw a little strip of silver stick out from under her thigh. She moved herself to the side best she could as Emma took the key between the fingertips of her thumb and index finger.

"To what do I owe the discomfort of finding you in such a compromising position, Santana?" Emma asked and tried to fit the key in the hole without having to touch any more of the metal than needed.

"I had some company last night." Santana said incidentally, eager to get of the chains. When she could move her arms she flung them around Emma's neck, pulling her in for a hug.

"Thank you." She breathed out, extremely relieved. Emma stiffened, slightly uncomfortable with the excessive contact of Santana's naked skin but she couldn't help but giggle a little. Santana always did have a way of loosening her up a bit.

"Santana, may I remind you that you are still naked?" She said when she thought the hug had lasted a little too long.

"Sorry." Santana apologized and got of the bed, dressing herself in a silky robe. "Have you had breakfast?"

"No… I didn't want to stop on the way." Emma answered quietly and followed Santana as she made her way through the apartment to the kitchen.

"Coffee?" Santana asked.

"No thank you. Grapes?"

"No thanks. Bacon?"

"No thank you. Cereal?"

"Yeah, I'll have some." Their morning routine was pretty much the same every morning but they still continued to ask each other, just in case. Santana settled herself by the table, waiting for the coffee machine to do its thing.

"So…" Emma started, joining Santana at the table with a bowl of green grapes a cloth to wipe them clean. "Who's the mystery girl?"

"Brittany... Something. She's a cop." Santana answered slowly, her mind rushing through everything that went down last night.

"That's exciting! How did you two meet?" Emma asked popping the first scrubbed grape in her mouth.

"We met at the bar… I'm not sure what she was doing there but she broke up a fight between me and Mercedes."

"Do you two ever get tired of fighting?" Emma chuckled.

"Not really… It's sort of the foundation of our friendship." Santana joked and stretched over the table, stealing one of Emma's grapes.

"I haven't cleaned that one yet!" Emma exclaimed with panic in her voice.

"I don't care." Santana laughed and wrapped her lips around the grape, sucking it into her mouth with a plop. Emma just watched, astonished, before shaking her head to continue the conversation.

"So, are you going to see her again?" She asked and raised an eyebrow. Santana knew Emma wasn't too fond of her constant one night stands with girls she didn't even know the name of. Santana thought about Brittany. She never would have let any other girl do what she let Brittany do. There was just something about the innocent blue eyes and blonde hair in contrast to her masterful and exhilarating persona. She was absolutely gorgeous and radiated energy. She was the kind of person you just had to like and wanted to be around all the time.

"I want to." Santana answered honestly, earning a proud smile from her friend across the table. "But she just took off. She didn't leave a number or anything." She continued, getting up to pour herself a cup of coffee in an attempt to hide how disappointed she was about it.

"Oh." Was Emma's response. She wasn't really sure how to continue the conversation. Santana threw a glance at the clock on the wall and saw that it was only 9.30.

"Geez, woman! Have you been driving all night?" She asked Emma.

"I couldn't take another second in that house."

"Aw, honey! That bad?"

"Always." Emma sighed.

"What did they say about Puck?" Santana asked and sat herself down again, paying full attention to her, now clearly upset, friend

"Well, at first they were excited about my getting married… but when I told them he probably didn't have any ginger blood in him they sort of… forbid it." Emma tried to hold back a quiet sob.

"They can't do that. You're a grown woman!" Santana almost shouted irritated with Emma's parents always ruining every good thing in their daughter's life.

"I know. That's what I said. But they're not coming to the wedding so I don't have anyone to give me away…" Emma said and sighed again. It hurt Santana to see how much pain Emma was in, but she was proud that her friend had really started to learn how to stand up to the insane bigots that were the Pillsburys.

"Sweetie, I'll give you away if you want?" Santana suggested and walked around the table and stroked the ginger woman's hair.

"But you're my maid of honour…" Emma protested and glanced up at Santana with a pouty lip.

"So? I can do both! I'm awesome at multitasking." Santana joked.

"You are not!"

"Am too!" They both laughed for a while and Santana was glad to have eased some of the tension.

"So, are you and Puck still not having sex?" Santana raised her eyebrows in a playful manner. She knew talking about sex made Emma a little uncomfortable but she liked to see her squirm, and she figured it was a good way to change the subject.

"No, I told you. We want to wait until our wedding night."

"But what if he's shit?"

"Santana!" Emma exclaimed a little offended.

"What?" Santana asked, and still thought the argument was valid.

"As long as he doesn't cuff me to bed and leave me there, I'm sure it'll be wonderful." Emma said and smirked.

"Touché!" Santana giggled and lifted the 'cougar town'- imaginary hat. It had become somewhat of an inside joke between the girls. Santana was used to being able to out-insult Emma but she let her have this one and left the kitchen to take a shower.

A couple of hours later, when the girls were watching TV, they heard a knock on the door.

"That's Noah." Emma said with a smile and untangled herself from Santana's slim legs resting in her lap. When she came back she had Noah's arms wrapped around her waist and they were both smiling like morons.

"Well, look at you two lovebirds." Santana chirped and sat herself up straight on the sofa.

"Hello to you too, Lopez." Puck grinned and sat down next to her, pulling Emma with him so she landed on his lap and they giggled with their noses pressed against each other. Then, with her arms around him, Emma nuzzled up in the crook of his neck.

When Emma had first introduced Puck to Santana, she didn't think there was a chance in hell it was going to last. Santana had never seen such an odd couple in her entire life, but she had also never seen two people more in love.

"Wooe, Lopez! What happened to your wrists?" Puck asked with wide eyes.

"Last night got a little crazy." Santana shrugged.

"Crazy with a woman?" Puck asked. He didn't really have a problem with the whole lesbian thing but it was like he was still expecting it to pass any minute.

"Yes, Noah. With a woman." Santana sighed, tired of always having to answer that question.

"Hm. You know I have this friend, Artie. He saw your facebook page and he's constantly begging me to hook you and him up on a date." Puck said and tried to make it sound alluring.

"Well, would you be so kind as to inform him that where there's a penis, there's no Santana." Santana answered matter of factly, hoping Puck would just drop it. Emma chuckled at the response. Santana got up from the couch and disappeared into her room for a while. Every now and then she could hear the couple murmur out in the living room.

"I love you."

…

"What do you want for dinner?"

"I don't know but you're so cute I could just eat you up!"

…

"Oh wow, someone's been working out?"

It was far too distracting since Santana was trying to obsess about a certain blonde, so she decided to head out for the day. She popped her head back in the living room.

"I'm off." She said and nodded good bye to the cuddling couple.

"When will you be home?" Emma wanted to know and stood up to not let herself be distracted by her fiancé's hands or lips.

"I'll probably just crash at Mercedes'" Santana shrugged and liked the idea of giving the couple some time alone. "But we're still getting our weddin'-dress-shopping on tomorrow, right?" She asked.

"Yes, definitely!" Emma answered and glanced coyly over to Puck sitting on the couch.

"Alright, dear."

"Bye darling." They both said their good byes with a British accent and gave each other exaggerated kisses on each of the other girl's cheeks. That was another one of their insider things and made both Emma and Santana smile as Santana left the apartment.

* * *

><p>"Yes! That one! Perfect!" Santana exclaimed when Emma appeared from behind the curtain.<p>

"You think so? The other one goes better with the floral arrangement." Emma said with a hesitant look bothering her face.

"They're both white?" Santana disputed. She couldn't tell the difference in color on any of the dresses in the bridal shop.

"They're different shades." Emma clarified and opened her mouth to explain further but Santana beat her to it.

"Whatever. Your boobs look huge!"

"Really?" Emma questioned and lifted her eyes to look at herself in the mirror.

"Totally." Santana confirmed and stood up from the armchair. Emma was taking her bloody time and Santana was growing weary being in the store for so long. She didn't feel like she belonged in such a fancy place and judging by the looks she got from the stuck-up sales girls – they didn't think so either.

"I have one more dress to try." Emma said and disappeared into the dressing room again. Santana wandered about, looking at pictures of ridiculously happy people in poufy dresses and snug suits. There were only pictures of heterosexual couples getting married. It was normal enough, but stuff like that had begun to bother Santana lately. She snorted.

"Can I help you?" A pretentious voice penetrated her left ear.

"I'm just waiting for my friend…" Santana said quietly and moved further away from the dressing rooms. The bell on the door indicated that the store had new customers coming in so the sales lady left her alone.

"This is gonna be fun." Santana heard a familiar voice blubber from across the room. Her eyes sought the source and in a mirror she saw a familiar head of hair in a group of three other girls. Santana froze. Could it be?

She moved closer and opened a bridal magazine to cover her face and thus also her identity. The girls started spreading out. The woman who Santana assumed was the bride was left talking to a sales person as the other ones started flicking through magazines and looking at dresses. Santana was sure now.

First she didn't know what to do. Should she hide? She wanted to meet her again, though. She quietly sneaked herself closer, making sure she wasn't noticed. She was soon standing next to the blue eyed woman staring at a dress on a mannequin.

"I wouldn't buy that if I were you." Santana spoke and startled the woman who jumped back in a frightened manner.

"Ms. Lopez?" She exclaimed with shock taking over her features and a coy smile pulling at the corners of her mouth.

"Brittany… We meet again."


	3. Chapter 3

Greetings! I absolutely adore the feedback I'm getting! I present to you... a boring chapter? Maybe, I'm not sure.

**CHAPTER 3**

**"Wedding bells"**

"What are you doing here?" Brittany blurted, trying to wipe the surprise of her face and keep the excitement from bubbling over.

"Oh, I didn't tell you? I'm getting married next week." Santana joked.

"You are?" Brittany looked down and her voice instead filled with disappointment and maybe even a splice of jealousy.

"No, of course not." Santana chuckled, amused with Brittany's reaction.

"Oh." Brittany's face lit up slightly again and she smiled at Santana.

"No, my friend Emma, the one I told you about, she's getting married in two months, to her fiancé." There was a pause. "Well, obviously… who else would she be marrying?" Santana added and shook her head at her own stupidity. Brittany giggled and then silence set in for a while. Santana couldn't decide if it was awkward or just tentative. She filled her lungs with air.

"So! Cuffed anyone to a bed lately?" Santana figured she might as well acknowledge the elephant in the room. Brittany chuckled coyly. She looked so incredibly sweet when she laughed. If Santana were lucky enough to get to meet this woman again she would work her hardest to get her to laugh all the time. Then Brittany's face morphed into something slightly more seductive.

"Well, there was this one really hot chick the other night…" Brittany flirted.

"Oh really?" Santana lured, a little taken by Brittany's bluntness. She thought that Brittany looked even more gorgeous today than the other night. Out of uniform she looked so much more feminine. She wore really tight black jeans paired with black stiletto high heels, making her quite a bit taller than Santana. Her shirt was more of a blouse. It was loose but hugged her more snugly around her bust, flattering the curve of her waist and hip. It was white, but a little sheer in the material and Santana could see a black bra through the fabric. In her cleavage rested a golden chain with a 'B' on it. Her hair was pulled back in one of those ponytails that look sloppy but really they take forever to fix and she was wearing pearl earrings.

Sending a glace over to Brittany's accompanied friends Santana could tell these ladies were not exactly from the poor parts of town. It didn't really make sense that Brittany would be rich if she was a cop, though?

"Uh-huh." Brittany answered huskily and lifted her arm over her head to support herself with it, as she leaned against the wall, her face moving closer to Santana's. The whole manoeuvre was pretty sleazy but Santana couldn't help but find it incredibly sexy. Brittany stared at Santana's lips, so she licked them slowly to tease, hoping for a little revenge. For a second Santana thought they were going to plunge into a full-blown make-out session right then and there.

"Oh my God! Is that my fault?" Brittany blurted suddenly, straightening herself again and taking Santana's wrists in her hands, stroking the red marks gently with her thumbs.

"You did kinda' leave me hanging." Santana chuckled, loving Brittany's touch.

"I'm so, so sorry! I didn't really think that one through." She explained herself, not letting go of Santana's wrists.

"It's fine. I'm just bummed you left." Way to be bold, Santana! She thought to herself and already regretted the words.

"I was gonna keep in touch." Brittany answered quickly and seemed as surprised with her bluntness, as Santana was with hers.

"How?" Santana questioned. "You don't have my number and I don't have yours."

"I'm a cop, remember? I have my ways." She winked. "Besides, I do know where you live." Brittany continued and gave Santana a shy smirk.

"Stalker." Santana joked and both girls laughed. The shaking of the laughter suddenly made them aware of the fact that Brittany was still holding on to Santana's wrists. She abruptly let them go and Santana let them fall just as fast. That silence set in again.

"Hey, now that we're here… I was wondering if you, euhm, maybe…" Brittany begun.

"Santana! Santana, where are you?" Emma called from over by the dressing rooms.

"Sorry." Santana excused herself and walked back to her friend.

"What about this one?" Emma asked, twirling around, showing Santana the back of the dress.

"Huh? Santana grunted and her eyes wandered to where Brittany was now tending to her friend.

"Santana, the dress?" Emma asked a little annoyed with not having her friend's full attention.

"Yeah, great." Santana shrugged, but really tried to bring her focus back to the redhead.

"Do you think it is prettier than the last one?"

"Which one was the last one again?" Santana asked absent-mindedly as her eyes kept flickering back to the other side of the store.

"Do you wanna leave?" Emma asked with noticeably more irritation.

"No!" Santana blurted. "No, this is important!" She repeated.

"Which is exactly why we should do it some other time, when you're not so distracted!" Emma shot back and headed for the dressing room to change into her regular clothes. Santana panicked. She didn't want to leave without another chance to talk to Brittany.

"No, wait. I'm sorry! Try the other one again… please?" Emma's lips pursed as she was trying to still be angry with Santana, but she was never good with holding a grudge for more than ten seconds, and when Santana gave her that pout, it soon dripped off.

"Fine…" She said and couldn't hold back a smile as she walked into the tiny room to undress again. Santana tried to not be so obvious but as soon as Emma had disappeared, her eyes shot back in Brittany's direction.

This time she caught Brittany looking back. She threw her head down in reflex but it was already too late. Brittany had seen her looking - and seen her look away. She felt heat stir up in her cheeks. A little embarrassed, she lifted her gaze again and met the blue eyed woman with a smile. Santana thanked the Lord that they were so far apart, otherwise her blushing would be terribly obvious.

Their moment broke when Brittany's bride-friend nudged her, demanding all of her attention. Santana couldn't hear what the brown-haired bride was saying but Santana thought she looked like she was being terribly loud, her big mouth moving exaggeratedly under her large nose. Dwarf! Santana thought, having already decided to hate this woman for ruining hers and Brittany's cute staring contest.

The Asian one of Brittany's friends rolled her eyes and flipped page in her magazine. Guess Santana wasn't the only one who had a problem with Bridezilla over there. Another blonde, but with shorter hair shushed the brunette who seemed insulted but then let herself be directed towards a different dress than the one she was wearing. The two wandered off somewhere and with the Asian still staring into the magazine Brittany took a look around and then sat herself down in an armchair much closer to, and facing directly towards, Santana.

Santana's eyes flickered nervously for a second before regaining composure and giving Brittany more of her smiles. Brittany lifted her hand and waved flirtatiously with her fingers. Santana lifter her hand slightly and waved back.

"Hello." Brittany mouthed across the room.

"Hi." Santana mouthed back and giggled.

"How are you?" Brittany asked, making sure her lips moved slowly so Santana could really see what she was saying. Santana felt a little silly but it was kind of sexy too, so she played along.

"Fine. How are you?"

"Amazing."

Santana didn't really know where to take their silent conversation now so she hesitated to let Brittany take the lead again. She didn't have to wait long.

"You. Look. Beautiful." Brittany mouthed extra slowly and Santana felt the redness creeping back into her cheeks as she read Brittany's lips.

"Thank you." Santana smiled and took a little break to contemplate whether or not she was going to return the compliment.

"Okay, last time I'm gonna try this one." Emma's voice said and Santana flinched to look at her friend.

"Welcome back, Boobs McGee!" Santana grinned and nodded her head in approval.

"Santana!" Emma was trying to sound offended but secretly she loved how the dress highlighted her usually small looking bust.

"I'm kidding! You look stunning, sweetheart!"

"Really?" Emma's confidence wasn't always on top and whenever she got a compliment, she always needed to confirm it before believing that the person really meant it. Santana thought it was adorable.

"Yes! Puck is gonna die when he sees you." Santana answered and walked up to the redhead, putting her hands on her shoulders, showing her how much she truly meant it. Emma's eyes looked a little glassy and she had to exhale.

"Alrighty then! This is the one." Emma smiled with her whole face and gave a determined nod.

"Great! You up for some lunch?"

"Let me just change real quick."

"Sure thing, babe! Want me to send one of those preppy bitches over to help you?" After Santana said it she heard a woman clear her throat behind her. By the frightened look on Emma's face she knew it was one of those sales ladies. Fuck.

"Sorry." She said as she turned around but the woman just ignored her and looked at Emma.

"Is that the one you decided on, Ms. Pillsbury?" She asked.

"Yes, I think so." Emma answered. Santana soon tuned out the women as their chitchat continued and became more and more dull. She redirected her attention in an attempt to locate Brittany again. The chair she had been sitting in was empty. When Santana didn't see the Asian girl either she began to fear that the company had already left. Then she heard loud talking.

"Quinn! Are you trying to ruin my wedding?"

"Come on, Rachel! It doesn't look that bad…" Santana turned around and looked at the short-haired blonde referring to a very ugly dress the brunette had dressed in.

"Oh, really? Would you get married in this?" The bride shrieked back.

"Well, no... But then again, I would never marry a man with a butt chin either."

"Hey! It only ads to his charm." Rachel defended.

"Oh please, Will is about as charming as a wart-covered pickle." Santana was beginning to think it sounded like a lover's quarrel. Or at least like someone had eaten a slice of jealousy pizza. She snorted in amusement.

"Ladies, calm down!" Brittany stepped between the two girls fighting and it reminded Santana of how she broke up the fight with Mercedes in the same way. Santana felt a little tingle in the pit of stomach. Seeing Brittany act with such authority really turned her on.

"You ready to go?" Emma asked behind her. Santana snapped out of her trance.

"Yeah." Santana took her friend under the arm and walked with her to the exit. She opened the door for Emma, who thanked her and walked out to the street. Santana threw a last glance inwards hoping to find Brittany's eyes, but with no luck. She caught up with Emma and the two walked together down the street. After a couple of yards Santana heard heels clicking and soon felt a tap on her shoulder. She stopped and turned around only to have Brittany walk right into her.

"Oh, fuck! Sorry." Brittany apologized and stepped back. Santana just giggled.

"I was wondering if maybe…" Brittany begun like she had before, but took a pause to catch her breath. Santana could feel the anticipation growing inside her. She was hoping and praying that Brittany was about to ask what she thought.

"If maybe you'd like to have coffee some time? – No, not coffee, that's lame! – Dinner! Do you want to have dinner? Or drinks? I could do both, or you know either one, whate…" Brittany got lost in her rant. Santana smiled. She couldn't figure Brittany out. Usually she was really confident and flirtatious and now she was a nervous mess. Santana loved it, but figured she'd spare Brittany anymore agony.

"I'd love to!"


	4. Chapter 4

So I was going to settle into this really comfortable every-other-day-update-thing but rumour has it I'm going to London tomorrow... those who know me, know that I like fast updates so I couldn't very well leave without giving you one more chapter.

I don't remember exactly when I'm supposed to fly back (I'm really on top of things) but I promise that as soon as I'm back I'll update first thing! Should be no later than the 8th. Okie-dokie, chapter-wise this was a toughie but I did my best. Enjoy! And thank you for reviewing! :)

**CHAPTER 4**

**"Can't"**

Santana twirled in front of the mirror.

"I'm so fucking hot." She murmured between her teeth while checking out her own ass. She looked over her shoulder and gave herself a wink. Then she turned around and rolled her eyes at herself for being so corny.

She had butterflies in her stomach. God, why was she so nervous? Stupid blonde hair and blue eyes burning in her mind. Stupid first date messing with her head. She couldn't remember ever feeling so… vulnerable.

Santana always hooked up with hot girls so it wasn't that Brittany was gorgeous that threw her off her game. But there was something. Something she couldn't put her finger on. Maybe that she was actually going on a date at all for the first time in three years? Maybe that she actually wanted to go on a date for the first time in three years?

Santana looked at her phone, the screen said twenty-six minutes until Brittany was supposed to be outside, picking her up and taking her someplace she still didn't know where. She opened her purse and put her phone in it, then her credit-card, her keys, some make-up for touch-ups and a tampon. It wasn't that time, but her policy was still to always bring a tampon.

When she had closed the purse again she heard her phone buzz inside. She stood completely still and listened. Yup, Puck and Emma were definitely still in the apartment... Must be Mercedes. Santana pulled it out and answered without looking.

"What's up?"

_"Santana? Hi, it's Brittany."_

"Brittany?"

_"Yeah, you know, from the… and then we met…"_

"I know who you are." Santana giggled. Did Brittany really think she could have forgotten her? "What's going on?"

_"I have some, well uh, bad new."_

Santana didn't really know how to respond so she just waited quietly for Brittany to continue.

_"I… well there's… something's come up."_ Brittany bit her lip on the other side of the line, terrified of Santana's reaction. Santana was pretty sure she heard correctly but she didn't trust her ear to brain cooperation. She didn't want to trust it.

"Excuse me?" Santana's tone was short and sounded offended. It was impossible for her to hide her irritation.

_"Uhm, yeah. I can't... I can't make it tonight."_ Brittany sounded tortured but Santana was still boiling.

"This is a fucking joke, right?

_"No…" _

"Fine." Santana was about to go off, then she realized that she barely knew this woman.

_"What?"_

"Fine." She still had trouble hiding that she was upset so it came out short and spiteful.

_"Santana, are you mad?"_

"No."

_"You sound mad…"_ You could practically hear Brittany's pout through the phone. Santana didn't think Brittany had any right to be upset with her for being angry though. She's the one ruining everything. Brittany can't do this. Santana couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Of course I'm fucking mad! We're supposed to meet up in like 20 minutes! I'm all dressed up and everything!" Crap, she totally regretted saying that last part. Now she was the loser, just sitting at home and waiting.

_"What are you wearing?"_ Brittany asked suddenly. Santana didn't really see what difference it made since Brittany wasn't coming anyways.

"A black dress, it's sort of draped and with a…"

_"Take it off."_

"What?"

_"Take it off!_" This time Brittany's voice was more domineering.

"Buh… whuh?"

_"Take. The dress. Off."_ Santana could feel the anger slowly being suppressed by arousal and she was kind of afraid to not do as Brittany said, even if she was nowhere near to do anything about it.

Still standing in front of the mirror she let the straps glide over her shoulders. She could see her own chest heaving up and down as the dress slid down her body, tickling her skin and then landing on the floor. It was like Brittany heard that Santana was now standing in her bra and panties.

_"Good girl. Now get on the bed."_

Santana backed up to the bed and crawled up on it; half sitting/half lying down, she could still see herself in the mirror. Brittany waited until she heard Santana's ruffling quiet down.

_"Are you lying down?"_

"Mm-huh." Santana squealed and nodded against the phone. The anticipation was growing inside her. The butterflies she felt before had moved lower and sent tingles through her.

_"Oh baby, you're breathing really heavily."_ Brittany's voice was hoarse and sexy and Santana loved it. She was already throbbing with need.

"_You want me to touch you, don't you?"_ Brittany groaned and smirked on the other side of the line.

"Yea-yes." Santana breathed through her teeth.

_"Where?"_

"Anywhere…" Santana was eager and never dealt gracefully with being teased.

_"Can I kiss you?"_

"Uh-huh." Santana moved her hand up and pressed her fingers against her lips.

_"Your lips are really soft."_

Santana put a finger in her mouth and massaged it with her tongue.

_"I'm kissing you neck… damn, your heart is beating really fast."_

Santana moved her hand lower to her neck, feeling her pulse pound against her fingertips.

_"You feel my hand wander up your side…"_

Santana drew her hand up her side slowly, tickling the sensitive skin of her waist. Brittany moaned into the phone.

_"Your tits are perfect in my hands."_

Santana's arm crossed her chest and she cupped one of her breast while pressing down on the other with her forearm.

"It's so hot."

Santana grunted and kneaded her breast harder.

_"Your nipples…"_

Santana quickly arched her back to reach the clasp of her bra, and unhooked it to grant more access to the set of rambunctious twins on her ribcage.

_"… are so hard for my touch and they feel so good in my hands."_

Brittany followed her statement with another groan and Santana clenched her breast harder, feeling the nipple poke out between her fingers. She pinched it and threw her head back, breathing heavily into the phone.

_"Oh God, baby, I'm so hot for your pussy. I can't stay away any longer."_

Knowing what was coming up, Santana spread her legs wider and lifted her knees off the mattress by bending them.

_"With my body between your sexy legs I'm sliding down lower."_

Santana arched her back again, scooting lower to press more of her back against the bed. Trailing one hand flat downwards on her stomach she tried to suffocate her desperate moans.

_"Fuck, you're wet!"_

Santana moved her hand inside her underwear and oh God, she was gushing. Santana felt her slick folds heating her hand as she moved up and down her slit.

_"Who makes you that wet?"_

Santana's hand was almost trembling with arousal and her movements between her legs became almost jerky as her concentration was flailing.

"Guuuh- you do."

_"Who?"_

"You." Santana's voice was hoarse and came from deep down in her throat.

_"My name, baby. Say my name."_

"Brittany! Brittany makes me… urgh God!" As soon as Santana said the name; her mind flooded with images of their first encounter. Brittany's perky pink nipples, her milky skin so smooth against Santana and the little strip of blonde between her legs. Santana groaned desperately.

_"Do you feel that? That's my tongue inside you."_

Santana finally thrust two digits inside herself. She soaked her thumb in more of her juices and started moving it over her clit while fucking herself with her fingers, imagining Brittany's face between her legs.

_"Mmm, it's so good."_

Brittany's husky voice echoed in Santana's mind.

"Fuuuh-mmm, don't stop!" Santana was already getting close but she wanted Brittany's voice to throw her over the edge.

_"I want you to feel what I'm feeling. Taste yourself."_

Santana hurried the hand up to her face and lazily smeared some of her drooping wetness on her lips before shooting her hand down into her panties again. When having found the rhythm of her wild rubbing again she let her tongue run over her lips. Tasting her throbbing self, she moaned with her whole body.

_"You look so sexy when I'm fucking you."_

Brittany moaned. Santana could hear her getting closer too because her breathing was becoming really irregular and it turned Santana on like crazy.

"Britt?" Santana squeaked when she felt she couldn't hold on any longer.

_"Not yet! Don't cum yet!"_

Brittany's voice was almost as wanting as Santana's now and upon hearing it, Santana let out louder, more frustrated groans than the once before. She completely forgot where she was and that Emma and Puck were in the other room. She flexed her body, holding on for dear life. She listened to Brittany's increasingly desperate noises on the other side while still moving inside her underwear. The tingle and the desire… she was shaking… impossible to…

_"Uh-fuck, cum with me."_ Brittany finally breathed and Santana let the release take over.

Her walls closed in on her fingers as she pressed down on her clit. She screamed as she shuddered against the sheets and almost crushed the phone in her hand. She swung it away from her ear to let the side of her face be buried the pillow. When she lifted the phone to her ear again, she did so just in time to hear the phone hang up. What - the fuck?

She totally did it again. Brittany's 'bang-and-bail'-act only needed two times to get seriously old! Santana felt the rage build up side her again. Feeling blown off and rejected in combo with fucked and abandoned, Santana flew up off the bed.

While still clenching to the phone she stormed out of her room without really knowing why and completely oblivious to the fact that she wasn't wearing anything but underwear. When she heard Puck and Emma's voices, she felt the weight of her breast and had time to, with some fumbling, hook her bra again before entering into the kitchen where the two were sitting.

"Santana!" Emma exclaimed when she saw her almost naked friend strut in with angry steps. Santana ignored her and opened the fridge, not sure what she was looking for.

"Noah, don't look." Emma said softly to her fiancée and turned his head to look out the window. Then she stood up in an attempt to get Santana's attention. Santana was so angry she could feel tears burning in her eyes. She wasn't going to cry though, she couldn't allow herself to do that. She snapped instead.

"Fuck, Emma! I'm so fucking pissed off right now!" She screamed, slamming the fridge door shut.

"What? Why?" Emma asked with a frown and couldn't for the life of her figure out what she had done wrong.

"That fucking little bi–uuuuuuurrrgh!" Santana didn't know why, but for some reason calling Brittany a bitch was just too much, even in her wild wrath.

"Santana what happened?" Emma sounded concerned. "Did the date not go very good?"

"Emma, look at me! There is no date!" Santana blurted still sounding furious. Emma reluctantly let her eyes wander from Santana's face and travel down her whole body. Santana hadn't actually meant for Emma to literally look at her but Emma at least realized her mistake.

"Oh…" Emma said quietly and feeling sorry for Santana, all the irritation caused by her parading her naked body in front of Noah dripped off her, and she returned to the table where Puck was still loyally looking out the window. Emma took her fiancée's hand but kept her eyes on Santana as she decided to continue.

"She thinks she can just call and cancel? And then she fucking gets me off and hangs up, like what the fuck?" Santana looked at Emma like she was waiting for the redhead to have all the answers, but Emma looked back at her with a puzzled frown.

"You mean she let you off? Like letting you off the hook?" Emma asked. Puck tried to hold back a little laugh and squeezed Emma's hand harder.

"No, sweetie." Santana sighed and smiled amorously at her adorable friend. "No. Like we just had amazing phone sex and then she just hung up." Santana explained, now with softness in her voice. Emma's eyes went wide and then she cleared her throat.

"I was wondering… what those noises were…" She said quietly and looked down. Santana snorted in a nod, a little amused with Emma's facial expression. In the years they had spent living together Emma was still as shocked every time Santana used foul language, told her about a sexual conquest or in general did something Emma herself would not do.

When Santana felt her phone buzz in her hand she realized she was still holing it tight. She lifted it slightly so she could see the screen. It was from Brittany so automatically her thumb unlocked the phone and the text opened.

**Brittany: I still wanna take you out to dinner. How about Friday?"**

Santana just stared at the text and sighed. She already knew she was going to agree to it, despite doing everything in her power to fight it. Emma opened her mouth to speak again.

"Santana, maybe you should just let this one go and move on?" She asked as carefully as she could, to not upset Santana more. She did only have Santana's best interest at heart. Santana sighed again.

"I can't. That's why I'm so fucking angry. I just… can't."

* * *

><p>I know right? Who does Brittany think she is? I'm so sad I have to leave it like this.. Anyways, hope I haven't discouraged too many people now... next chap is their actual first date :)<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

Who's excited? I'm excited! I'm back with another chapter, it's kind of looong. First I'd just like to say a few words though. Of course it makes me sad that some people don't like my San or my Britt in this story but everyone's entitled to their own opinion so I'm not going to fight you on it. All I can say is that I write them the way I do for a reason. When deciding to write AU it was really important to me to make them into real human beings. Human beings have problems and baggage and there are complications and they make mistakes. So even though this story will be a lot of fluff and smut (look at me learning the words) I do have a plot and I did say life wasn't going to be easy for the girls. If you stick around you'll find out and if you don't – you don't. Okay that's enough seriousness for one day. Hope it wasn't too grumpy because I do do this for fun. Let's have ourselves a Brittana date!

**CHAPTER 5**

**"Tonight is perfect"**

"I'm really sorry about the whole mess this week." Brittany apologized as she emerged from her bedroom dressed in a red cocktail dress draping her long legs. It was really low cut in the back and all Santana wanted to do was get up from Brittany's couch and kiss the milky skin.

Brittany's hair was up in a tight bun and her lips were painted in the same color as her dress. She wore black stilettos again, but different ones. These were even higher and Santana was glad she was wearing heels too; otherwise she would have felt like a midget next to her beautiful tall date.

"It's fine." Santana said even though she didn't really think it was particularly 'fine'. She couldn't believe she was actually going on this date after having been treated… well, odd to say the least.

However, Santana felt like she had gotten some redemption. She had wanted to make Brittany beg, so she had to give her phone to Emma for a full day to not reply to the text right away. When she got it back she had seven missed calls and two more texts from an apologizing Brittany. She didn't call Brittany back but did answer when she called again the following day. She didn't agree to a date then or during the call after that, or in the one after that. She was quite happy to find that Brittany did beg and eventually Santana couldn't resist agreeing.

Until just about an hour ago she had thought Brittany had learned her lesson but… Brittany called about thirty minutes before the date was about to start and said she was running late, pushing the late date back even further. Brittany had picked Santana up while still in her cop uniform and brought her back to her apartment for Santana to wait while she showered and got dressed.

Santana was a little pissed at Brittany again, but mostly she was just pissed at herself for being so whipped before their first date had even officially begun. She didn't know what the fuck was going on with her. This is so not who she is at all. Santana sighed. She hadn't even been waiting long, Brittany was surprisingly fast but she still felt like maybe she wanted to leave. It was like Brittany felt a change in Santana's energy.

"Just gonna… one last…" Brittany said while walking past Santana in stressed manner, heels clicking and the sound echoing in the huge room. Santana took yet another look around the apartment.

The place was gorgeous. First of all the building had a portiere and Brittany was living in the pent house apartment, which basically took up the whole floor. Everything was really expensive looking and Santana was afraid to even sit down on the couch. It had a huge fire place in front of it instead of a TV. There was however one big flat screen TV in the kitchen, one in the master bedroom and one in the master bathroom. Santana still wondered where all the money came from? No way a cop-salary pays for all of this.

"There! All finished." Brittany sighed, hooking an earring in her lobe.

"About time." Santana joked with a smirk and stood up. Brittany could tell there was more than just a joke behind the words.

"Hey…" She started softly. "I know it's not fine. I am really sorry. I had everything planned out really well and there was so much I wanted to do and I wanted it to be… well, perfect and it just… I'm sorry." Brittany tried to find the other woman's eyes as Santana did her best to avoid Brittany's.

"Whatever. You're just nervous - 'cause I'm smokin'." Santana winked. She didn't really want Brittany to know how much the whole cancelling thing had messed with her head. Brittany giggled at Santana's plastered confidence.

"Well, I am… and you are! But I do really want to see you. And I will make it up to you." Brittany assured her and put her hand under Santana's chin. Santana smiled shyly and nodded slightly.

"So where are you taking me?" She breezed, trying to change the subject and lighten the serious mood.

"What, you don't like surprises?" Brittany chuckled while directing them both towards the front door.

"I hate surprises!" Santana confirmed.

"Really? I love surprises!" Brittany chirped as they left the apartment.

* * *

><p>The drive was filled with comfortable chit-chatting. Santana learned Brittany was doing undercover work for some sort of a drug deal bust. Santana thought it sounded kind of dangerous, but extremely sexy at the same time.<p>

Brittany learned that Santana is anything but happy with her job at a café just around the block from where she lives and that Santana has been stuck working there since she moved to New York three years ago.

They didn't drive very far and after they had parked, Brittany confidently took Santana's hand in hers and walked with her along the dock. Santana still didn't know what was happening but she was definitely intrigued. It was quiet for a while.

"Britt, what's this?" Santana asked with a frown when Brittany suddenly stopped.

"It's a boat?" Brittany answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No, that is a freakin' yacht." Santana breathed, eyeing the huge white watercraft.

"Okay, so it's a yacht…" Brittany chuckled, pulling firmly at Santana's hand, dragging her date with her to board it.

"As in yours?" Santana questioned with raised eyebrows.

"Mm-hmm." Brittany nodded and smiled at how taken Santana seemed to be by it.

"Sick." Santana whispered between her teeth as she walked behind Brittany onboard the gently bobbing vessel. With a firm grip on Santana's hand Brittany lead her through a corridor and out onto the deck.

Santana gasped for air when she saw the display. There were candles everywhere and red roses contrasted against the white fixture of the yacht. Soft music was playing in the background and in the middle of the wooden deck there was a table set for two. Given Brittany's track record, Santana would have never taken Brittany for such a romantic. But she had said she was going to make things up to Santana. Santana quite liked it, maybe more than she'd care to admit.

"Ladies! May I take your coats?" A deep voice said behind the two women.

"Yes, please." Brittany answered and slid her coat off her shoulders with ease, revealing her gorgeous red dress again.

"You have a yacht-staff?" Santana exhaled as she let Brittany remove her coat as well, and she handed them both to the man dressed in a sailor-like uniform. Brittany just laughed instead of answering. Santana could see a little hint of redness rise in Brittany's cheeks. Brittany followed the man with her eyes and waited until he was completely out of sight before speaking.

"You look amazing." Brittany finally said and carefully noticed every detail in Santana's appearance.

The dark hair was all combed to one side, exposing naked skin on one of Santana's shoulders while covering the other and it was kept in place with a hair clip. It was slightly wavy but not curled.

Santana's lips immediately caught Brittany's attention. They were discretely pink and with the perfect amount of lip gloss they looked amazing against Santana's slightly darker complexion. Santana's lashes looked like they went on forever and her brown eyes looked deeper than ever in the gentle candle light. A round golden earring in her left ear made her face shine even brighter.

The dress she was wearing was shorter than Brittany's and ended slightly below mid-thigh. Her skin looked deliciously caramel creamy in contrast with the white of her tight, strapless dress. Brittany's eyes followed Santana's legs down and found she was wearing white stilettos which lengthened her whole body.

The more Brittany looked, the heavier her breathing got and it wasn't until Santana giggled at Brittany's stare that she returned to reality. Brittany felt herself blushing even more and smiled shyly at Santana who beamed back at her. Brittany directed Santana towards the table by placing a hand on her back and let it slide down as far as she dared. She pulled out Santana's chair before walking around the table and taking a seat herself.

"A menu?" Santana asked when Brittany handed her a laminated chart with different dishes written on it.

"Well I didn't know what you like so I had the guys just whip up a little bit of everything…" Brittany answered shyly and earned herself a quiet laugh from Santana.

"What are you having?" Santana asked when she saw that there was no menu for the bother woman.

"I'm having whatever you're having." Brittany chirped and motioned for the waiter to come over. A waiter? Santana couldn't get over how absurd the whole thing was but it was sort of romantic and she felt very spoiled.

"I'd like the chicken…?" Santana almost asked and searched for something in Brittany's eyes to let her know she had made the right choice.

"Right, two of the chicken please." Brittany confirmed to the man, who nodded and scribbled it down on a pad even though it probably wouldn't be very hard to remember. "And a bottle of white? Red? White? Red?" Brittany continued and looked questioningly at Santana.

"White." Santana determined and smiled at the waiter who wandered off inside again.

Both the wine and the food arrived within minutes and the girls dug in.

"So…" Santana began after swallowing a mouthful of chicken. Brittany glanced back at her and took a sip of her whine as she waited for her date to continue.

"You have a yacht." Santana stated. "And a huge apartment." She added. "And a really nice car." She remembered and felt like she really wanted to know how Brittany could afford all these things.

"And a really gorgeous date." Brittany flirted and winked. Santana giggled and took gulp of her whine.

"Bet you're wondering how I scored all of this?" Brittany joked.

"Well, trying not to, but yeah actually… Cops aren't exactly known for making the big bucks."

"I know, that's really more for fun." Brittany answered. "No. Not for fun - that's the wrong word… Because it feels good." She corrected herself. Santana raised an eyebrow, indicating that she would like the story to continue.

"My dad was very rich, like insanely loaded, and since I'm an only child and I haven't seen my mom since I was like three years old, it all just sort of landed in my lap when he died." Brittany explained and followed her words with another sip at her glass.

"I'm sorry." Santana answered, both at the mother, the father and the sibling part. Santana felt like she wouldn't have very much left to live for without her mom, dad and sister, and she was sad that Brittany had none of the three.

"I don't really know what to do with all the money… Sometimes I splurge but then I feel really guilty about it and give like twice the amount I spent to charity." Brittany said and blushed a little more. "I didn't buy this, or my place, or the car, or the house in the Hamptons, or the apartment in Monaco, or the ski-cabin in Switzerland, or the private jet… it all just sort came with the endless bank account my father left me." Brittany nervously blurted. There was something about Santana that made her really jittery.

"Were you two close?" Santana asked and tried to not care about the fact that Brittany was probably the richest person she had ever encountered.

"Yeah, really close." Brittany smiled and nodded. "That's why I kind of like holding on to these things… They remind me of him, ya know?" Brittany thought about her father and couldn't help but feel a little sad that he wasn't here anymore. Santana nodded in response and took Brittany's hand when she noticed her sadness.

"Did he know you're… you know?" Santana hesitantly asked and wasn't sure how comfortable Brittany would be with talking about her sexuality.

"That I'm gay? Yeah, totally! He knew before I did." Brittany smiled again and let out a little laugh when she thought about her coming out to her father.

"One day, like way before I had even had a thought about it, he was like; BeeBee, I think you're a lesbian." Brittany threw her voice and made a funny face when she impersonated her father. Santana laughed a little before Brittany continued.

"And I was like; No I'm not! I mean, I barely even knew what it was back then; I was just really obsessed with Madonna. But then a couple of years later after I had figured it out, I got a little drunk at a party and my dad had to come and pick me up, and he was like; Any handsome fellows catch your eye tonight, BeeBee? And I was like; Dad, I think I'm gay… And he was like; Of course you are, pumpkin. And then we didn't really have a serious conversation about it or anything. It felt good that he didn't make a big deal out of it, because it shouldn't have to be one... But oboy, I did regret telling him from time to time because he wouldn't stop setting me up with these really weird girls... God, it must sound like we had a really messed up relationship." Brittany shook her head at everything she had just said, she couldn't believe how easy it was to open up to Santana.

"No, that's sounds adorable." Santana assured and squeezed Brittany's hand harder. "What about your mother?" There seemed to be no end to Santana's questions, she felt like sponge and she wanted to soak in everything there was to know about Brittany.

"No, no, no. Enough about me." Brittany protested and Santana could sense she definitely hit a soar spot asking about the mother. It only made her want to know more but she could wait.

"Alright. Well, I grew up in Ohio and yeah… no, this is too hard. You have to ask questions!" Santana suggested with a chuckle because she didn't really know which parts of her life to bring up and which to not.

"When did you come out?" Brittany thought that was an easy enough question and figured it would lead to follow-up questions.

"In high school." Santana answered matter of factly. She definitely felt it was harder to talk than to listen. She wasn't used to this talking and letting people in thing.

"Was it hard?"

"Not really. I fell in love and I wanted to be with her so there was never really a question of whether or not to come out. My parents were a bit worried at first but when they saw that being with her was what really made me happy it wasn't a problem." Santana smiled.

"Who was the girl?" Brittany wanted to know.

"Holly Holliday. She was my best friend back then."

"What happened?"

"Euhm… life. She was more on the bi-curious side and after a while she started dating the sophomore rugby captain, Josh Coleman – yuck! - We were sort of still friends but it was hard for me and after we graduated I moved here, so we lost touch completely."

"What was she like?"

"She was kind of crazy actually. Very funny! Tall, blonde, beautiful."

"Really?" Brittany asked with a grin. Santana looked up at Brittany with a coy smile.

"Yeah. Guess I have a type, huh?" She joked and they both broke eye contact and looked down at their food, both blushing excessively.

…

"This was delicious. I should get the recipe." Santana breathed out and looked down at her empty plate.

"Do you like to cook?" Brittany asked and leaned back in her chair.

"I love to cook! If I had to choose one room to spend the rest of my life in – it would be the kitchen." Santana giggled.

"Or the bedroom." Brittany winked but then looked away bashfully. Santana had had so much fun talking to Brittany she hadn't even noticed that the boat had been moving and when she saw the lights of the New York skyline shimmer in the shadow of the night, she shot up from her chair and raced over to the railing. Other than the breathtaking blonde, it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.

"This is… oh my God! It's so gorgeous!" Santana burst out and even had a little trouble breathing as she tried to absorb as much of the sight as she could.

Brittany stayed in her chair for a while and just watched the excitement. Brittany had tried so hard to impress Santana and all it really took was something that cost absolutely nothing. It was refreshing. She had spent too much of her life around rich, nasty bitches, who seemed to be cold to core. When Santana turned her head to Brittany for the 100th time with eyes pleading for her to join her by the side of the deck, she got up from her seat.

Santana felt reassured and turned her focus to the big city which looked so small from the distance. She took a deep breath of sea air and gripped her hands around the railing. Brittany walked slowly towards the woman dressed in white and ever so softly snaked her arms around her waist. She interlocked her fingers on Santana's stomach and felt Santana move her own hands to hug the grip Brittany had on her belly.

Brittany rested her chin on Santana's shoulder and filled her lungs with her scent, mixed with the ocean and the candle aroma. Santana's hands squeezed tighter around Brittany's.

"Thank you for all this." Santana whispered amorously and Brittany lifted her head and pressed her lips ever so gently against the smooth skin in the crook of Santana's neck.

"Dance with me." Brittany murmured and backed away, extending her arm for Santana to take her hand.

Santana turned around and placed her hand in Brittany's. With a light tug Brittany swept Santana close. One hand still holding on to Santana's, Brittany put her other on Santana's waist and Santana reached hers up and let it rest on Brittany's neck.

They swayed to the soft music, feeling each other's heat in the chilly night, listening to each other's breathing and soaking up as much of each other's scents as possible. As the minutes passed by the two shifted closer and closer. After a while their foreheads pressed against each other and they both closed their eyes at the sensation of breathing the same air.

Brittany's hand tickled its way up Santana's side until it reached her cheek, upon which it hugged it gingerly, before drawing Santana's face in for a kiss. Brittany's bottom lip fit perfectly between Santana's lips and Santana's upper lip fit perfectly between Brittany's lips.

The cautious kiss moved slowly as Santana caressed Brittany's neck, stroking at a few loose hairs, and Brittany withdrew from their handholding to hug Santana's face with both her hands.

She drew Santana closer and tilted her head to side slightly, deepening the kiss. Both girls lost themselves completely in the kiss as intensity and emotion consumed them while minutes rushed by. Brittanyy pulled away first with her eyes still closed and a big smile on her lips. When she opened her eyes she saw Santana looking at her with an equally huge smile.

"That was nice." Santana said softly while staring into the blue eyes in front of her.

"Mmmhm." Brittany hummed as a breeze blew across her lips, chilling them and enhancing the ardour of Santana still on them. She didn't want the moment to end. If it was up to Brittany she never wanted to spend another second away from Santana.

"Do you… do you wanna spend the night?" Brittany asked coyly and stared as the deck with held breath as she waited for the answer. Santana's hand found its way to under Brittany's chin and tilted it up a little, forcing her to make eye contact with.

While staring intently at each other, Santana leaned in closer. When she couldn't move any closer without pressing her lips against Brittany's, Santana nodded her head, making the side of their noses rub against each other. When Brittany felt it she took a breath of relief and plunged into Santana who giggled into the kiss before moving her lips against Brittany's again.

"Ladies…" A man's voice carefully tried to get their attention without ruining the moment. Both girls turned their head to look at him without breaking free of each other's bodies.

"Dessert is ready to be served." He nodded and gave the ladies a moment to return to the table before bringing two bowls of lemon sorbet and one really huge bowl of fresh strawberries.

"Champagne?" He asked and held out a bottle. Brittany just looked at Santana and waited for her to decide. Santana giggled and nodded her head. She took a strawberry from the bowl and wrapped her lips around it.

"So hot." Brittany mumbled. Santana heard her but pretended she didn't.

"Did you say something?" She asked with curiosity.

"No." Brittany shook her head but couldn't help but to blush a little. She took a spoon full of sorbet in her mouth to cool herself down.

"So, why'd you join the police force?" Santana asked wonderingly while she peeled the green off another strawberry.

"It's kind of a long story…" Brittany pointed out and lifted her glass to sip the champagne.

"I'm not going anywhere." Santana chuckled and looked at the surrounding ocean.

"Okay." Brittany agreed but took another gulp of the sparkly drink before beginning.

"I grew up in the suburbs… well more on the countryside and I guess you could say that I was somewhat spoiled…" Brittany looked around at the exclusive scenery to emphasize her statement. "… and really protected from everything ugly in the world. So when we moved into the city I was just… blindsided. I didn't even know poverty existed and now I was bombarded with the sight of bad neighbourhoods and crime and homeless people and sick people and drunks and drugs and just… everything changed. I changed. I knew then that I wanted to do something meaningful, you know - help, but I didn't really know what." Brittany took a little pause and looked at Santana who nodded reassuringly. With a deep breath she started again.

"I had this friend, well girlfriend actually… she was raped… It just ruined her. Everything in her life just broke, she lost her job, her apartment, all her friendships, then our relationship… Seeing that really tore me apart and that's when I knew…" Santana reached her hand across the table and Brittany held on to it tightly.

"I don't have a single day for the rest of my life… but it's like, how could I not?" Santana saw tears build up in Brittany's eyes and she felt like the hand holding wasn't enough, she wanted to offer more to Brittany and comfort her. Make her feel safe. Brittany saw the tortured look on Santana's face and felt bad for making her feel so helpless.

"I'm sorry." Brittany apologized but Santana just shook her head. She didn't think Brittany had anything to apologize for. "Let's talk about something else." Brittany decided and pulled herself together. Santana wasn't convinced.

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I don't want to ruin our first date." Brittany said in the same apologetic tone as before.

"You couldn't." Santana interjected softly and shook her head again. "Tonight is perfect." Brittany smiled at Santana who returned it with warmth in her eyes. As another breeze blew in Brittany was suddenly made very aware of the fact that it was anything but warm outside anymore. With closer inspection she saw goose bumps on Santana's arms and shoulders. She felt bad that she hadn't offered her a coat or a blanket or anything and she hoped Santana hadn't been freezing for too long.

"Let's go inside." She suggested and stood up. She walked around the table, pulled out Santana's chair, took her under the arm and escorted her inside. When through the door they were presented with a long corridor splitting the interior in half.

"Kitchen or bedroom?" Brittany asked playfully and glanced at Santana's reaction. She was hoping Santana wouldn't take it the wrong way. Santana just looked serene and peaceful and it calmed Brittany's jittery nerves.

"Bedroom." Santana whispered and glanced back at Brittany who tightened her grip on her arm and led her down the hallway to one of the doors. She opened it and let Santana go inside first before joining her and shutting the door behind them. Santana gasped at the gorgeous room. The lights were dimmed and on both of the nightstands more candlelight flickered and gave the whole room a beautiful glow. The bed was huge and centred in the room, taking up half the floor space.

It was decorated in creamy white and sage green and gave off a really grown-up vibe. There were windows but all you could see through them was the pitch black night. Also on the wall was a huge flat screen TV and speakers playing the same soft music as out on the deck.

Santana turned to look, only to find Brittany with her back turned to Santana, stepping out of her shoes and putting them in a closet. Before Brittany could turn back around she felt Santana's hand run flat over her back and it sent a shiver down her spine. Santana stroked her lips over Brittany's shoulder blades, while her hands slipped the straps of the red dress off the shoulders and it fell effortlessly to the floor.

One hand continued up to Brittany's hair and removed the clamp, letting her hair fall out of the tight bun to hug her shoulders. Brittany took a deep breath before she turned around, showing her almost completely naked front to Santana. Their eyes met. Santana wanted to look at Brittany's exposed breasts but she fought the urge and continued staring into the blue eyes.

Brittany smiled and found safety in deep, dark eyes. For once Santana was taller than Brittany but without looking away she too stepped out of her shoes, restoring the natural order of things. When the staring grew too intense, Santana turned around and let Brittany zip her dress down. Santana's dress hadn't allowed her to wear a bra either and soon both girls found themselves in nothing but panties facing each other in the middle of the room.

"You're mesmerizing." Brittany whispered softly, taking a step closer to Santana who leaned in and placed soft kisses on Brittany's collarbone and neck. A barely audible moan escaped Brittany's lips. Santana retracted her lips to look at Brittany again.

"Do you wanna… just lie here tonight?" Santana asked hooly. Brittany nodded gently.

"I'd like that very much."

They both lay down on the bed and Brittany pulled the covers over them before moving closer to Santana and wrapping an arm around her. As their continued conversations faded to murmur, then to complete silence, and rocked by each other's breathing, they fell asleep in each other's arms.


	6. Chapter 6

So last time I went all bitter old hag on your asses (I blame the long wait for the next glee episode) so this pre-chapter-monologue I'm instead gonna praise everyone who's faved and alerted and given me sweet reviews. As therapeutic as it may be for me to write, that's my favourite part. It's like a cake filled with rainbows and smiles. Thank you.

About the chapter, kind of a filler because after the first section I wanted some time to pass but I didn't wanna be like 'two weeks later' so I did it like this and I hope it works..

**CHAPTER 6**

**"Date night"**

"Bye." Santana closed her eyes and kissed Brittany again.

"Bye." Brittany mumbled into the kiss while also trying to hold back a ridiculously huge smile, which she found to be an incredibly hard task.

"I have to go inside…" Santana murmured but Brittany pressed her lips against Santana's mouth again.

"Mmm-hmm." Brittany hummed while continuing her assault on Santana's lips. Santana giggled and gently pushed herself away from the warm body trying to wrap around her.

"… and you have to go to work." Santana protested even though it was extremely hard to resist the blue eyed woman in front of her.

"One more!" Brittany beamed and leaned in closer again. Santana parted her lips and let Brittany's interlock with them one last time. It was positively the most delicious thing she had ever tasted. She pressed her whole body hard against Brittany before taking a big step back. Brittany pouted and let out a disappointed sigh.

"Fine." Brittany mumbled and tried to sound upset but she was so happy that it was virtually impossible. Santana stood still in her place on the sidewalk as Brittany got in her car and drove off, ready to serve in the name of the law. When Santana could no longer see the Brittany's car she punched in the code to her apartment building and pushed the door open. She had walked up the million stairs a million times before but her feet had never felt so light. It was like she was floating in the air. She couldn't stop smiling, not that she wanted to. It had been a really long time since someone made her feel the way Brittany did.

"Honey, I'm home!" Santana called when she opened the door and kicked her shoes off.

"Well, aren't we chipper?" Emma smiled as she appeared from the kitchen with a big cup of tea. When she saw how Santana had carelessly discarded of her shoes a frown spread across her face. She handed Santana her cup and squatted down to neatly place them next to her own. Emma didn't like it when things were messy around her but she also didn't like to demand others to keep things as orderly as she needed them to be.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart!" Santana exclaimed when she saw what her friend was doing.

"No, no! It's my problem." Emma assured her and threw a smile over her shoulder before turning her head back to perfect the placement of Santana's white heels. Santana was still up in the clouds so without thinking she took a sip from Emma's cup. She almost burned her tongue on the hot liquid.

"Oh, God! How do you even drink this? It's like a gazillion degrees out." Santana's body was burning up and the bright summer-sun luxuriating through the window didn't help.

"I'm always cold in the morning." Emma answered softly and took her tea cup back from Santana when she was upright again.

"Do we have breakfast?" Santana asked while still trying to decide if she actually wanted any.

"There might still be some cereal left but I think we're out of milk…" Emma pondered for a while and Santana didn't say anything, but just went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. Was she hungry? She still had butterflies in her stomach and didn't really feel like eating, but on the other hand, she usually gets grumpy if she doesn't eat in the morning.

"I can pop out and get some if you want." Emma tried softy, afraid she might have upset Santana somehow. Santana realized how quiet she had become when she heard the insecure tone in Emma's voice. She laughed at how adorable her friend could be.

"I'm sorry. It's fine! I think I'm too excited to eat anyways." She smiled at Emma and sat down at the table. Emma joined her and a little smirk toyed around the corners of her mouth.

"I take it last night went well?" She asked and raised her eyebrows in anticipation for Santana's answer. A huge smile spread across Santana's face.

"It was the most amazing first date – ever!" Santana burst out and grinned.

"Dirty talk, role playing or spanking?" Emma joked and was a little taken by her own boldness as even uttering the words made her blush.

"No, no, no! It wasn't like that." Santana ensured. "We didn't even have sex."

"Really?" Emma's eyes went wide and she was truly impressed with her friend. She hadn't heard Santana say that since… ever. Before Santana could continue Emma lifted the imaginary hat and bowed. Santana laughed.

"I know, right?" She patted herself on the back. "We just talked, and kissed, and talked, and… cuddled." Santana couldn't even believe that she was saying it let alone that it was actually true. Emma continued to look at Santana with her big golden brown eyes. There was something about those eyes that always had Santana spill her guts out.

"I don't know what it is about her…" Santana thought for a second. "You know how some girls totally dumb themselves out because they think it's "sexy" or they're trying to get attention or some shit?" Santana questioned.

"No, -"

"She's not like that. Or you know those girls who are so proud of themselves and keep bragging about the same crap all night long?"

"No, I wouldn't know abou-"

"Or clingy girls… Or those girls who freak out. First of all it's annoying as fuck that they're still in my apartment when I wake up. They don't have to go and rant about how they were drunk and they're not really gay and it's so weird that they followed me home. It's like - I rocked your world and you know it. Get out." Santana was getting a little worked up about how irritating girls could be. Emma opened her mouth but nothing came out so Santana continued.

"Brittany is none of those things. She's just like a person, a real person. Which is weird."

"It's weird that she's a person?" Emma giggled.

"You should have seen her place. She gave a little tour of it and oh my God. And the yacht – it was like three times the size of this apartment."

"You lost me now, San." Emma thought Santana was longer making any sense since she was basically just uttering everything that plopped into her head. Santana realized that Emma didn't have all the background facts.

"She's rich. Like I-could-buy-Asia-rich. But she's not a bitch."

"All rich people are not bitches." Emma frowned at using the word. It was a little strong for her taste.

"I know. But some of them are."

"You certainly dodged a bullet then." Emma joked and took a sip of her tea.

"Ha-ha. I'm just saying she's down to earth. Not to mention gorgeous. She's funny and she can say the most random things. And she's just Brittany… bitch." Santana playfully raised her eyebrow as she said the last part. Emma is a closeted Britney Spears fan. Emma ignored the reference. Santana loved to tease her and with time Emma had learned it was best just to pretend she didn't hear it.

"So she's a keeper? That's great!" Emma said instead and was overjoyed by the fact that it now seemed like maybe she wouldn't run in to random, half-naked girls in her kitchen for a while.

"It's so fast but I haven't felt like this since… Holly." Santana shook her head at the realization. "Shit." She muttered between her teeth.

"Santana, that's sweet." Emma said, excited about her friend's new love interest.

"It's scary as shit, is what it is!" Santana argued. Her mood had gone from ecstatic to panic so suddenly.

"No. Santana, I think this is one of the best things that has happened to you in a while." Emma protested lovingly and nodded her head gently. Seeing her best friend be so sure made Santana calm down again. The day had started off so amazingly, she didn't want to ruin it by freaking out.

"You're right. You're totally right." Santana smiled at Emma who seemed to be every amused by the infatuation.

"What?" Santana asked with a frown when Emma wouldn't stop smiling at her.

"You are so smitten."

"Am not!"

"Are too!" They both giggled and Santana was so grateful to have a friend like Emma.

"So when do I get to meet her? For real?" Emma asked and opened her eyes even wider in excitement. A careful smile pulled the corners of Santana's mouth.

"I don't wanna jinx it…" Santana started quietly and took a deep breath. "But I was actually thinking… if things keep going well… that I'd ask her to be my plus one at your wedding?" Santana's voice was questioning and eyes were begging for permission.

"Really?" Emma was a little sceptical.

"Yeah… if that's okay with you?" Santana was getting worried; she knew how Emma hated when you messed with her wedding planning.

"It's just… you didn't check a plus one and everything has already been decided and ordered and with only seven weeks left it would be very chaotic and I don't know if I…" Emma was plunging into a nervous rant when she thought about everything being thrown out of order.

"Look, I don't even know if I'm gonna dare to ask… or if she's going to able to come or if she even wants to but… well I… pleease?" Santana begged and Emma desperately wanted to wipe that tortured look off Santana's face.

"Okay, okay! I'll move some things around and make some calls and rearrange a few things and try to- " Emma was ranting again but Santana ignored her and ran around the table attacking Emma's cheek with kisses.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" She exclaimed and almost wanted to jump off the floor in excitement. Emma smiled and didn't even care that Santana was totally messing up her hair.

"Well, I needs to get myself in the shower." Santana shrugged and started walking towards the bathroom.

"When do you get off work today?" Emma wanted to know before Santana had made it out of the room.

"Seven." Santana answered.

"I was thinking maybe having Puck over…" Emma stated hesitantly.

"Yeah, that's fine." Santana confirmed. "Brittany and I have plans so I won't be here anyways." She continued and the thought of seeing Brittany again made her sport the biggest, silliest grin. Santana wanted to flash forward so she could see Brittany sooner. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Later that evening, Monday<strong>_

* * *

><p>"What do you wanna do?" Brittany asked Santana as she pulled away from their greeting kiss.<p>

"I don't know." Santana shrugged. It didn't really matter to her what they did.

"You can choose anything!"

"Anything?" Santana questioned with raised eyebrows and Brittany nodded.

"So if I want to go to London…?"

"I wouldn't choose London for this particular date… It takes like seven hours to get there and we both have to work tomorrow..." Brittany furrowed her eyebrows as she tried to think of a way to make Santana's wish come true. Santana chuckled.

"Britt, I didn't actually mean –"

"Wait! I know where to take you." Brittany interrupted and opened the car door for Santana. As they drove they talked about how their days had been and what they had done. Brittany drove down 7th avenue and turned into West 54th Street.

"The London Bar." Santana said amused when she realized where they were going. "That's really sweet, Britt."

"Have you been here before?" Brittany asked as she opened the door for Santana to step inside.

"No." Santana shook her head. "It's so fancy." She looked at the modern interior. It was really impressive. Brittany spoiled her already.

"You're fancy." Brittany said and took Santana's hand even though she was only gonna get to hold it for a few seconds until they were seated.

"Do you think Gordon Ramsey is here?" Santana asked and looked around curiously.

"Do you have a crush on him?" Brittany joked.

"I just like his no bullshit attitude. I've only seen his food on TV but I bet it is tasty."

"You're tasty." Brittany beamed across the table. Santana soaked in Brittany's adorableness.

"You're such a dork." Santana laughed and looked at her menu.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Wednesday afternoon<strong>_

* * *

><p><em>"Santana, don't be mad."<em>

"I'm not mad. I just don't get it."

_"I really want to spend tonight with you but I can't"_

"Why?"

_"I can't tell you but I'll make it up to you."_

"I'd prefer it if you didn't have anything to make up to me."

_"I know. Me too." _

"Brittany... do you not wanna...-"

_"Don't say that! You know I wanna see you." _

"Pff... I don't know what I know."

_"San, I have to hang up now but please don't be angry!" _

"I'll try."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Thursday night<strong>_

* * *

><p>"I don't know, B." Santana said hesitantly.<p>

"Come on! Please! I know you'll love it." Brittany tried to be convincing and combined with her pout it was working pretty well.

"I get to choose which one?" Santana wanted to confirm and Brittany nodded since she had already promised that earlier that week.

"Okay, but if I don't like it…" Santana started and tried to think of something appropriate to ask for.

"I'll be your loyal sex slave for a week." Brittany filled in and wondered where the bold words came from.

"Deal." Santana agreed a little too quickly and blushed a little in the warm summer night. The sexual tension was building up between the two who hadn't had sex since their first encounter. If you don't include the phone-sex.

"I can't believe you've never seen a musical before." Brittany said and turned her upper body slightly towards Santana while still being able to walk down the street without accidentally crashing into a lamp post.

"I have." Santana argued.

"Movies don't count! It's not the same!" Brittany beamed at just the thought of seeing one. "I've seen them all so many times…" Brittany continued.

"What's so great about them?" Santana wondered and was genuinely interested since Brittany seemed so infatuated.

"Everything! Live theatre is so amazing and people sing. Come on, who doesn't love singing? And the best part is the dancing." Brittany's eyes sparkled. "The dancers are so great and everything is in unison and done with perfect timing. God, I wish I could dance like that."

"You can dance." Santana stated like it was obvious. "I bet you're better than most of the people in whichever musical we're going to see."

"You haven't seen me…-"

"Oh, I have seen you bust a move." Santana interrupted and nudged her date amorously.

"When?" Brittany wanted to know and besides slow dancing with each other she couldn't think of a time she had danced in the few dates they had had.

"Sometimes it's like you can't hold it in." Santana explained.

"That just sounds weird…" Brittany said and felt embarrassed about having randomly broken into dance without even noticing it.

"I think it's hot." Santana ensured and raised her eyebrows seductively. "I wouldn't mind seeing more."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Late Friday night<strong>_

* * *

><p>"You were right." Santana said as Brittany pulled up outside Santana's apartment.<p>

"I'm always right." Brittany said playfully and unbuckled her seat belt.

"Musicals are awesome." Santana sighed at the memory of one song that really got to her. And the woman who sang it was just amazing.

"You're awesome!" Brittany said when she opened the car door for Santana who hadn't even noticed that Brittany had gotten out of the car. They took the couple of steps to Santana's door together.

"Thank you." Santana said and took Brittany's hands.

"The pleasure was all mine, Ms. Lopez." Brittany spoke formally but leaned in for a not so formal kiss. Santana's hand travelled to Brittany's waist instead and she pulled Brittany closer. The kiss deepened and Brittany's eagerness soon had Santana pressed against the door. Feeling frisky, well horny, Santana's hands continued their journey and she soon had a firm grip on Brittany's butt. Brittany smiled a little surprised into the kiss before pulling away.

"Cheeky." Brittany teased and straightened herself a little, easing her pressure on Santana's body.

"Do you wanna come upstairs?" Santana's voice was somewhat raspy and she couldn't stop staring at Brittany's lips which were slightly redder than usual due to their vigorous kissing.

"Urgh, yes!" Brittany exclaimed and pressed her lips against Santana's again. When she pulled away she had a different look on her face. Sadder. "But I can't. I have to get up early tomorrow and I have… stuff." Brittany said quietly and gingerly stroked her hand over Santana's cheek.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Tuesday evening<strong>_

* * *

><p>"I can't believe you just did that." Santana said and laughed a little.<p>

"What?" Brittany asked and looked up with meat sauce covering her nose.

"You just nudged a meatball with your nose." Santana was in awe of Brittany's ability to act so freely on her impulses.

"It's the last one." Brittany said and wiped her nose with a napkin. "And I wanted you to have it."

Santana stuck her fork in the meatball and took a little bite from it.

"Best meatball I've ever tasted." She said amorously and smiled at Brittany. Brittany smiled back but kept wiping at her nose.

"I think I have to go to the ladies room." She said softly and pointed at her nose. She stood up and walked in the direction of the toilets. Santana watched her until she was out of sight.

Brittany seemed to get more beautiful by the second and Santana was getting seriously sexually frustrated. They kept flirting about sex and touching in places but they still hadn't slept together again. Santana was absolutely dying to feel Brittany's naked skin and taste her and smell her and make her scream. That night before, Santana's hands had been locked to a bed frame. She still hadn't gotten to do any of the things she has wanted to do since that night.

She saw Brittany coming towards her again. So sexy in her tight dress with the heels and some strands of hair playing around the frame of her face as she walked. Tonight was the night. It had to be.

"This is really embarrassing…" Brittany started and walked to Santana's side of the table instead of to her own to sit down.

"What did you do, B?" Santana asked amused and imagined several scenarios where her goofy date could have made a fool of herself.

"I need… Do you have a…?" Brittany dragged out the 'a'.

"Aaaa… napkin?" Santana tried and handed it to Brittany. She couldn't figure out what Brittany wanted – her nose looked fine now.

"I was hoping it wouldn't come to that actually…" Brittany said quietly and didn't accept the napkin so Santana put it back on the table.

"Britt?" Santana sounded very confused now.

"Do you have a tampon." Brittany whispered between her teeth but Santana didn't quite hear her.

"Huh?"

"Tampon." Brittany said a little louder and avoided Santana's eyes. Santana mouthed an 'oh'. She felt like a major light had gone out inside her. Guess tonight wasn't the night after all.

"Yeah, sure." Santana said slowly and reached for her purse and fumbled around in it for a while. She felt was she was looking for and discreetly pulled it out. Brittany's hand reached over Santana's and it almost felt like Santana was slipping Brittany some drugs or money. That touch alone had Santana quivering and she squeezed her crossed legs tighter. Fuck.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Thursday, lunch time<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana took a sip of her water and looked at the time. She was a little early. She tried to amuse herself by looking around at the people in the restaurant. She loved this place, it was great with light lunches which is exactly was Santana was in the mood for. She got distracted by her phone ringing. It was Brittany. Whenever Brittany called her it gave her an unnerving feeling in the pit of her stomach.<p>

"Hello." Santana answered.

"Hi, San!" Brittany beamed through the phone.

"What's up?" Santana asked as if on autopilot but immediately regretted her words. They were cursed.

"I know it's very last minute but something has come up and I really need to deal with it." Brittany said softly.

"As in you're not coming?" Santana wanted to confirm and sounded a little irritated. She sighed.

"Well I…-"

"But I'm already here." Santana said and stared into her lap with a pout. She didn't understand why Brittany couldn't just not agree to the date in the first place if she wasn't sure if she was going to make it.

"I know and you look gorgeous!" Brittany said and sounded a little happier again.

"What?" Santana asked confused furrowing her eyebrows but not lifting her gaze.

"Look up." Brittany beamed. Santana lifted her head and searched everywhere for a head of blonde hair she would recognise.

"I said look up, not around, silly." Brittany giggled. Santana shifted her head to look straight ahead and saw through the window. Out on the sidewalk an adorable Brittany was waving at her.

"If you can't make our date why are you here?" Santana asked sceptically.

"Had to see you." Brittany said matter of factly.

"Will you at least come inside and kiss me?" Santana asked and still pouted a little.

"Try and stop me." Brittany said and hung up. Before Santana could even blink Brittany was in front of her.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sunday afternoon<strong>_

* * *

><p>Brittany's moans filled the room. She screamed Santana's name and closed her fist with strands of dark hair in it. She arched of the bed and her head lifted off the pillow slightly. She felt her body tense and her walls tighten. She felt so alive but like she couldn't breathe at the same time. She didn't know what to do with herself and everything going on inside her. She rested her head fully on the pillow again and her flexed muscles relaxed.<p>

"You're. Really. Good. At that." Brittany breathed exhausted and her chest heaved largely between each word. Santana kissed Brittany's mound, then her lower abdomen and then Santana's head peeked out from under the sheet.

"I really like doing that." Santana smirked and took her bottom lip in her mouth, sucking it clean of Brittany's juices. Sunday brunch at Santana's hadn't even made it to lunch before Santana and Brittany were all over each other. The long wait had them both really worked up and with just one simple touch they had plunged into each other. Then they spent the last couple of hours not leaving the bed. Good thing Santana had told Emma to go to Puck's and stay there.

"You're so sexy." Brittany said looking down at Santana who started kissing Brittany's torso as she shifted her body higher. Soon Santana's head was in the same height as Brittany's and she kissed her lips and then lowered herself, letting most her weight rest on Brittany. They were both getting a little tired by now. They rested like that, in silence, for a while.

"Santana?" Brittany asked to check if Santana was still awake as she felt herself almost dozing off.

"Mm-hmm." Santana hummed but didn't lift her head from where it had found its perfect fit against Brittany.

"I like you. A lot." Brittany said calmly, still almost drifting into sleep. Santana froze for a second.

"I like you too." She then said and lifted her head to look at Brittany who locked her blue eyes in Santana's. Santana bit her lip in hesitation and took a deep breath.

"Can I ask you a question?" Santana followed with, and looked fairly insecure.

"Of course." Brittany said gently and stroked some hair away from Santana's face.

"What do you do when you can't make it to our dates? Where do you go?" Obviously the question had burned inside Santana since the very first time Brittany cancelled on her but she had been afraid to ask. She was still afraid. The complete change in Brittany's facial expression didn't calm Santana one little bit. Brittany's eyes looked concerned and worried. They were tortured and agonized.

"Not that question… please don't ask that question."


	7. Chapter 7

Did anyone see Heather Morris on Letterman? She's adorable!

**CHAPTER 7**

**"Emerald green"**

"Why can't I know?" Santana asked, sounding a little offended and moved off Brittany who was lying underneath her.

"Because it doesn't matter." Brittany said matter of factly, fighting the impulse to snap in defence. She was wide awake again. The two girls' bodies were no longer touching and a strange mood, a tension they had never shared before, crept to the surface. Santana frowned. She was just as clueless as before, only now she knew Brittany was hiding something.

"It kinda matters to me, B." Santana spoke softly and hoped that that would lure the answer out of Brittany who was now sitting up straight in the bed.

"I should go." Brittany said, getting off the bed and she quickly found her jeans which she pulled up without putting her underwear on first.

"Why?" Santana asked while sitting herself up in the bed and covered her naked body with the sheet. For some reason it made her feel less vulnerable.

"It's better that way." Brittany said quietly as she paced back and forth looking for her shirt.

"Why?" Santana asked again and tried to find eye contact that was successfully avoided it by Brittany putting her shirt on.

"Because I don't wanna lie to you." Brittany whispered so quietly Santana could only hear unclear mumbling.

"What?" Santana asked since she was dying to know what has just been said.

"Can you just… please, just let it go?" Brittany pleaded and stepped closer to the bed. Santana thought for a second. Could she just let it go? First of all - what could possibly be so bad? Is Brittany some sort of a psycho killer? Is she married with twelve kids? What? Wondering bothered Santana. It bothered the crap out of her.

The more she let her mind ponder on it though, the more she realized that what she feared the most was, if it all came down to it, would she lose Brittany? Would she have to choose her away if it got too difficult? Santana couldn't handle another heartbreak. There's a reason she stayed away from getting serious with anyone for three years.

"Is it me? 'Cause if it is, don't worry about it, I'll be fine. I'm a big girl." Santana lied and hoped it didn't shine through in her eyes. Brittany looked hurt.

"Whuh? No! It has nothing to do with you, or how I feel about you!" Brittany ensured and reached out to touch Santana, who shrugged back.

"I've had enough of this shit. Britt, if you don't wanna see me again just say so." Santana said with a voice sharp enough to kill. Brittany felt like she had gotten stabbed. Did Santana really think Brittany didn't care for her?

"Stop it, Santana! Of course I want to see you, I do! And I would totally be with you all the time if it weren't for this thing. I'm really sorry." Brittany pleaded, inaudible tears building up her eyes. Santana shook her head. Brittany climbed back on the bed and scooted really close, her knees digging into the mattress on each side of Santana's petite body.

She wrapped her arms around Santana who used all her strength to not sob against Brittany's shoulder. When Brittany held Santana things felt different. The worries just slipped away for a while. A phone started bleeping somewhere and startled Santana. Brittany looked around and saw her phone on the floor buzzing, bleeping and blinking.

"Fucking perfect." Brittany muttered bitterly as she got up and picked it up. When she saw the screen she threw a cautious glance over to Santana and then walked out of the room to answer it. Santana was left on the bed, fixing her eyes on the sheet but not really looking at it. She couldn't believe what was happening. Why did she feel so hurt? And why did she feel like it didn't even matter if she just got to spend one more second with Brittany?

"Fuck." She gritten between her teeth as she realized that she was quickly and helplessly falling for the blue eyed blonde out there. Why had she let herself do that? Stupid.

When Brittany got back she leaned against the door frame and looked like she wanted to just sink through the floor or fly away.

"What's wrong?" Santana asked worriedly and stood up, wrapping the sheet around her like a dress.

"No nothing's wrong." Brittany shook her head. "That was… I have to go… so well yeah, everything's wrong." Brittany said carefully and stared at the floor, too afraid of what was to come next. Santana's stomach tightened and her throat closed up. Brittany was seriously blowing her off again? She wanted to scream, or kill someone. But the two of them hadn't known each other for very long so she couldn't go all psycho Brittany, but at the same time she had to let her know that she couldn't keep doing this because it was really irritating and mind-fucking and… heartbreaking.

"I'll make it up to you." Brittany tried but it just made Santana feel worse. Santana couldn't take this anymore. Every time hurt more than the last one and she couldn't bare it any longer. Not only had she been blown off by this girl more times than the complete total of all other times in her life, but she also didn't know why - nor was she allowed to know why. It was too much to just swallow and accept. This isn't how things are supposed to be.

"I don't want you to make anything up to me!" Santana said spitefully but with desperation. A silence prevailed and it felt like it lasted an eternity before Brittany dared to speak.

"If I leave now, will I get to see you again?" Brittany asked and clenched her jaw while she waited for the answer.

"Please say that this will stop?" Santana begged in a questioning manner and sighed. She was pretty sure she knew the answer.

"I can promise you that I'm gonna do everything I can to make sure it doesn't happen again." Brittany said and a tear made its way down her cheek at the fact that it was the best she could offer Santana. Santana stared at the ceiling and then at the beautiful woman in front of her.

"It's your last chance, Brittany."

* * *

><p>"You look good, B." Santana stated when Brittany pulled up to the curb outside Santana's apartment and got out of her. Santana suddenly felt like maybe she was a little underdressed in her skin tight jeans and black top versus Brittany's silky ivory dress.<p>

"I have some bad news…"

"What?" Santana's eyes flickered back and forth in confusion.

"I fucked up…" Brittany said hesitantly and apologetic while trying to maintain eye contact with a now clearly upset Santana

"You're shitting me right? It's a joke. You're joking." Santana snorted and backed away from Brittany; ready to just turn around and go back into her apartment.

"No…" Brittany sighed but the sight of Santana walking away had her panicking. "But I was wondering if maybe you'd like to go with?" Brittany blurted questioningly and sounded scared rather than insecure. She started fidgeting with the silver chain around her wrist. Santana shook her head, but it was more from being angry at the situation than answering the question.

"I just have to give a speech… it won't take long and then we can do whatever you want. Please come with me, San! I'm dying to spend time with you." Brittany's eyes were pleading for Santana to agree to this, but she knew it was a long shot.

"Please, please, please!" She begged.

"I don't know, Brittany…You're really dressed up and I…-"

"I have something for you… if you agree to come with me." Brittany smiled nervously and went back to her car, retrieving a big white cardboard box with a golden ribbon on it. She held it out to Santana who lifted the top off and pulled out a gorgeous emerald green dress.

"Britt…?" Santana breathed.

"Do you like it?" Brittany asked with sparkling eyes.

"Britt, this could pay my rent for the rest of the year. It's too much. I can't accept this." Santana shook her head and folded the dress back in the box.

"No, no of course you can! I bought it for you. I thought it would go great with your hair and your skin and you're gonna look so beautiful and… please just… I want you to have it." Brittany pleaded but Santana continued to shake her head.

"Just wear it tonight and then we can donate it to charity or something." Brittany suggested, now desperate for the rejection to stop. The shaking of Santana's head calmed and then stopped. Santana looked up at Brittany with big eyes. God, Brittany was beautiful! But her face was so sad. Santana didn't want Brittany to be sad; she couldn't take seeing her like that. Santana lifted the dress again and held it out in front of her.

"Okay." Santana smiled softly. Brittany rushed forward, dropping the box and hugged Santana and squeezed her tight.

"Britt, you're gonna wrinkle the dress." Santana giggled. She stepped back and was going to go back into her apartment to dress up.

"No time." Brittany interjected and pointed in a different direction. Not one to litter, Brittany quickly threw the pieces of cardboard in her backseat and locked the car. Santana realized they weren't going in Brittany's car and she got confused.

"Britt, where are we going?" Santana asked but continued walking to wherever it was Brittany was leading her. Then she saw where they were headed. A couple of yards further down the street a long, dark limousine was parked. Santana gasped, stumbled and almost fell forward.

"I know…" Brittany sighed. "Totally boring, right? But I have to keep up appearances or whatever." She shrugged and opened the door for Santana.

"This backseat is bigger than my bedroom." Santana was in awe as she scooted in farther on what seemed to be a forever ongoing car seat. Brittany hopped in after her and scooted close next to her. Brittany ignored Santana's statement and shot her with a smirk instead.

"Alright sexy! Time to get naked." Santana's eyes widened at Brittany's words but she didn't mind changing in front of Brittany, who had seen her naked more than once before.

"Unfortunately for you Finn, that means the show is over." Brittany continued and pressed a button, hoisting a black screen, so the chauffer could no loner see them. Santana liked the fact that Brittany didn't want anyone else looking at her. Possessiveness had always been one of Santana's biggest turn offs because she liked to live a little on the looser side, but when it came to Brittany it was like everything she thought she knew about herself turned out to be the opposite. It was confusing and strange but in a way fun and exciting.

"So where are we going, anyways?" Santana asked as Brittany zipped her up.

"To the hospital. There's a fundraising event for cancer tonight, and as a main donor I have the honour of saying a few words." Brittany explained and Santana nodded as she sat herself down on the seat next to Brittany again. Is this what she does when she can't see me? Santana thought and felt a little lighter. She's saving the world? That wasn't so bad. It wasn't bad at all. So why was she being so secretive about it?

"Ravishing!" Brittany exclaimed and smiled at Santana who looked down and blushed. The dress did look really good and Brittany had been right, the color went amazingly with Santana's skin tone and hair. Brittany turned her head and looked out the window.

"That's what happened to him, you know… My dad." Brittany said monotonously without turning her face back. "It didn't really happen to him, I guess, he smoked like a chimney – so when he got lung cancer he always said he had it coming - but it's still unfair." Santana heard her voice getting more upset. She needed to comfort Brittany. She reached her hand out under Brittany's chin and guided her head so they could look at each other. Their eyes met and Santana's let Brittany know that she was there for her. It comforted Brittany who managed to smile for a second before tearing up again.

"There are just so many bad things out there; I don't know how to make it all stop." Brittany sobbed quietly and let her head rest against Santana's shoulder as Santana wrapped her arms around Brittany and stroked her back. She wasn't at all prepared for Brittany like this, but all she cared about was making it better.

"Shhh." Santana tried to calm Brittany but she didn't really know what to say. She hoped just being there, holding her, would be enough. "You're doing so much!" She tried.

"It's not good enough." Brittany sniffled and lifted herself from Santana's embrace. Santana locked her brown eyes in Brittany's blue ones.

"You are good enough. You're way better. You're so special and amazing and… magical. Like a unicorn." Santana didn't know where the words came from, she just knew she meant them. Santana used the back of her hand to wipe away a tear from Brittany's cheek. Brittany's eyes suddenly shot up.

"What did you say?" Brittany asked softly.

"Like a unicorn." Santana answered gingerly. Brittany smiled against Santana's hand and kissed it.

"I love unicorns."

"They're beautiful. Just like you." Santana had successfully made Brittany feel better and the girls' smiles warmed the limo.

"Thank you." Brittany whispered. A speaker crackled, startling both girls and then a man's voice spoke.

"We have reached our destination." The man said and at the same time the limo slowed down and pulled up to the hospital entrance. Santana saw a little bit of panic creep into Brittany's features. Her eyes were still a bit glassy. Santana used both her thumbs to wipe under Brittany's eyes and erase any trace of her crying. While she still had a grip on Brittany's face she leaned in a placed a quick kiss on her lips. Then she brushed over Brittany's lip with her finger to fix the lipstick again.

"There! Stunning!"

* * *

><p>Santana and Brittany walked hand in hand down the street. Midnight was closing in on them and they were getting closer to Santana's apartment. Santana slowed her pace to make her time with Brittany last longer. In just two blocks it would be over. The date had been so amazing and Santana didn't want to part with Brittany.<p>

Brittany stopped and pretended to read a poster someone had stapled to a tree. She didn't want the date to end either. Brittany had worked the fundraiser fast, politely greeting everyone and mingling with all the important people.

Brittany and Santana looked amazing next to each other and Santana had felt a little bit like they were a married couple. Santana had also half expected to be introduced as Brittany's friend but to her surprise; Brittany proudly let everyone know that Santana was her date as they made conversation with the doctors, researchers and other donors.

After Brittany's speech they visited the cancer-sick children's ward and sang songs with the kids there. Brittany didn't hurry that part but when they were done she was eager to spend some alone time together. They took the limo and went to a restaurant which just happened to have a red carpet out front. Naturally they took a bunch of nerdy pictures of each other and together, posing on it in front of the fancy car.

The whole date had just been awesome. It was like that afternoon in Santana's apartment had never existed. It was just a bad dream. Brittany couldn't believe how easy it was to talk to Santana and Santana couldn't believe how much she loved to listen to Brittany. Even if she still found it difficult, Santana opened herself up as well, and once she got going, sharing her own stories actually felt pretty good.

The poster didn't have enough words and staring at it any longer would be weird so Brittany started walking again. She was careful to not move too fast though. Santana kept looking down at her dress. She really loved it.

"If I do something else for charity, can I please keep the dress?" Santana sighed. Brittany just giggled,

"Of course you can, silly! It's yours." Brittany smiled and squeezed Santana's hand tighter.

"But it doesn't feel quite right… Seeing everything you do for other people just makes me feel like a bad person." Brittany came to a halt again. She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"How can you even say that? Santana, you're the most bestest person I've ever met!" Brittany's smile was crooked but heart warming and her eyes were screaming how much she meant her words. She put her arms around Santana's shoulders and tried to cuddle away the pout from her lips.

"Tell you what... I volunteer at the homeless shelter on Saturday mornings. Next time you could come along if you want?" Brittany suggested. Santana nodded in response and reached up for a kiss. Santana really felt like Brittany was making her into a better person. After losing themselves in each other for a while, they broke the kiss and started walking, neither of them speaking. Santana had come to quite like their silence. It wasn't awkward or nervous, it was just there and comfortable.

"I really liked your speech." Santana said amorously. It had actually made her tear up a little bit. She didn't want Brittany to know that, but she had definitely seen it since she practically couldn't take her eyes off Santana during the whole time she gave it.

"Thank you." Brittany beamed. She loved every compliment Santana gave her. "I just feel really strongly about it, you know?" Brittany continued.

"Tell me something you don't feel strongly about?" Santana joked lovingly. She was really impressed with how many causes Brittany supported; it was virtually every one that existed. Brittany giggled and blushed. They had reached their destination but neither of them wanted to acknowledge it.

"You were so adorable with those kids. " Santana said and added that to her list of things she really liked about this night.

"I love children." Brittany smiled.

"Yeah? How many kids do you want?"

"Three! Marlon B, James D and Santana Jr." Brittany blurted and then her eyes went wide. She looked at Santana and met brown, equally wide eyes.

"I'm sorry! I don't know why I said that! That's too much, too soon. I'm sorry." Brittany shook her head in embarrassment and covered her face with her hands. Santana giggled at how freaked out Brittany got. Usually a statement like that would have Santana running in the opposite direction but it's like she thought before, with Brittany everything was just upside-down – in a good way.

"It's fine!" Santana ensured. "Don't worry about it."

"No, no, that was...-" Brittany started to protest, still consumed by humiliation.

"It was sweet." Santana murmured shyly and pulled Brittany closer. "But let's see if we can't have ourselves a couple of more dates before we start making lady babies." Santana grinned. Brittany felt herself calm down a bit. She snaked her arms around Santana's waist and locked them in place on her back.

"That sounds like a pretty good plan." Brittany confirmed and leaned in to kiss Santana on the lips.

"Good night, Santana."

"Good night, Brittany." With one more kiss the ladies parted and Santana went into her building as Brittany got in the car she had left there earlier. Even though Santana was crazy-tired, she had a feeling she wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. Marlon B, James D and Santana Jr. - she kinda' liked the sound of that.

* * *

><p>Okay so... you must be patient with this story. The answers will come but they walk slowly… like baby turtles.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

Hinting you say... fair enough. Just remember things can be what they seem and they can be... not what they seem. :)

**CHAPTER 8**

**"Morning miracles"**

"B, this is so great." Santana beamed at the adorable woman next to her. She scrunched her nose. "The smell could be… yeah… but this feels really good." Santana continued and scooped a blob of porridge in a bowl. A man with a birds nest for hair and ragged clothes smiled at her, revealing two missing teeth, and then he took the bowl.

Santana was surprised at how much she enjoyed doing this, and the fact that she was actually up at this time on a Saturday was a miracle. All thanks to Brittany. I'm so lucky. Santana thought but was distracted by Brittany wiggling her hips and bumping against Santana.

"What are you thinking about?" Brittany asked when she had the other woman's attention.

"You." Santana said bashfully.

"So that smile…"

"Uh-huh, all about you." Santana said amorously and Brittany exposed her teeth in a big grin. Brittany leaned over and pressed her lips hard and playfully against Santana's cheek. When another person approached the counter they both straightened themselves to give the woman some food. Brittany's phone started buzzing in her back pocket and she pulled it out.

"I'm just gonna…"

"Got you covered, babe." Santana said casually with a smile and turned her attention to the grey haired woman dressed in a winter jacket despite the fact that it was July. She didn't need to rush though. It was a pretty calm morning and thanks to generous donations by one Brittany S. Pierce the homeless here had much to choose from.

"Could I have the porridge please?" Jacket-lady politely asked. Santana reached to scoop some for her but the dish was practically empty.

"Gimme one sec." Santana said with a smile and grabbed the empty metal dish and carried it with her to the back to replace it with a new one. In the kitchen she was met with the sight of Brittany's back.

"No, no. Listen, Sugar...-" Brittany said rather loudly and it had Santana coming to a complete stop.

"Who's Sugar?" Santana blurted and startled Brittany who quickly turned around; her mouth slightly open in a shocked expression. She stared at her phone and then at Santana. She unnecessarily mouthed bye into the phone and then let her hand fall to her side.

"Who's who?" Brittany asked. She tried to act casual but absolute turmoil and panic was growing inside her.

"Sugar." Santana clarified with a sharp tone and a raised eyebrow.

"Last time I checked… it was a baking ingredient." Brittany spoke slowly. Her brain had to work so hard not to say anything wrong right now.

"And last time I checked people didn't have phone conversations with it…" Santana said suspiciously. She hadn't seen Brittany uncomfortably squirm like this before. What was happening here?

"I wasn't speaking to sugar per se… I was telling my housekeeper to buy more sugar." Brittany explained. This could work. Santana drew a breath of relief. She felt a little stupid. That made a lot of sense. Of course sugar isn't a person. Who names their kid Sugar?

"I'm sorry. I'm just being paranoid." Santana apologized and shook her head to completely rid herself of the unnerving feeling she had just had.

As soon as Brittany heard Santana apologize she felt a knot in her stomach. Had she really just lied to Santana? This gorgeous, amazing, breath-taking, mesmerizing, funny, kind, lovable, charming, adorable, cute, sexy… perfect woman is standing in front of Brittany and apologizing for everything Brittany is doing wrong. Brittany felt nauseous with herself. What was she doing?

* * *

><p>Santana woke up and could immediately sense that something was different. Warmer. She opened her eyes and saw the beautiful woman stretched out flat on her stomach with the sheet drawn over her legs, barely high enough to cover Brittany's butt cheeks.<p>

Santana glanced down at her own body only to discover that nothing was shielding her naked skin from the air in the room. She wasn't cold though, rays of sunlight pierced through the beige curtains, heating the room and creating an almost angelic morning light. Santana smiled and turned her gaze back to the snoozing Brittany.

On her bare back rested locks of blonde hair. Her face was turned to Santana and slightly squished against the pillow, causing her lips to form a little pout. A knee poked out of the sheet and into Santana's side and Brittany's leg looked so silky smooth, Santana clenched her pillow to not reach her hand out and touch Brittany.

"Good morning." Santana whispered as quietly as she could, through a beaming grin. Those words felt like magic. Like finally reaching the end of the rainbow. Santana had learned that Brittany was the queen of sneaking out in the middle of the night and this was the first time Santana had been allowed to spend the night at Brittany's place.

All the other nights together, which were limited in numbers, had been spent at Santana's place, and every morning she woke up alone. Santana turned her body to reach the nightstand on 'her' side of the enormous bed. She grabbed her purse and fumbled trough it.

Morning breath was one of the her biggest phobias and she didn't want to subject Brittany to hers. She plopped a mint in her mouth and sucked on it for a while. She didn't want to wake Brittany but the longer she stared at her peaceful slumber, the more Santana wanted to touch and feel Brittany's body.

Waking up like this was heaven and she couldn't believe that since their first date, they hadn't woken up in the same bed even once. Getting to spend time with Brittany at all was a bit of a challenge and required a lot of planning. Even so Santana felt a little better, she could live with the occasional cancelling and rescheduling. In the last week they had been fewer and in a sense she had gotten used to them.

She still wondered, but she tried not to think about it. She certainly didn't want to think about it now. She was here and Brittany was here and that was all that mattered.

Santana shifted her body, slightly lifting herself up and supporting herself with one elbow she reached her other hand out and stroked over Brittany's back, brushing away her hair and feeling the warm skin underneath. Santana instantly wanted more and rose to her knees, manoeuvring herself to straddle Brittany's behind, but careful not to let too much of her weight rest on Brittany.

She bent down, arching her back, and traced soft kisses up Brittany's spine and up her neck, and shoulders, and shoulder blades, and then down again along the waist. Santana knew Brittany was a little ticklish, so she sneaked her tongue out as she kissed there and Brittany finally began to stir under her.

"Mmm, morning." Brittany gruffed and smiled, twirling her body under Santana to lie face up and look at the gorgeous woman.

"Good morning." Santana answered and giggled at Brittany's goofy smile. Santana leaned down and placed a kiss on Brittany's lips. Brittany wrapped her arms around Santana and flipped the two around so Santana was one her back with Brittany between her legs. The kiss deepened and Brittany nibbled at Santana's lip.

"Mmmh, you taste good, San." Brittany groaned without releasing the lip between her teeth.

"Can I have some of that?" She continued to ask, pulling away and lifting her head. Santana was pleased with herself when Brittany expressed approval of her flavour. She extended her arm out to reach the box of mints on the nightstand. She didn't mind Brittany's morning taste, surprisingly she actually found it quite sexy, but she also didn't mind sharing her tropical pineapple breath fresheners.

She took a pastille between her fingers and brought it close to Brittany's lips. Brittany opened her mouth and waited for Santana to put the mint in her mouth. When Santana didn't, she leaned in to grab it between her lips but Santana pulled it away. It moved further and further down and Brittany's head followed loyally, enjoying the game.

"Come and get it." Santana finally smirked and plopped the candy in her own mouth instead.

Brittany plunged her lips into Santana's. Santana parted her lips and allowed Brittany's tongue to roam her mouth in search for the candy. When Brittany tasted it she let out at moan and kissed Santana even more passionately.

They rolled around on the bed, the mint changing mouths several times, their moans growing louder by the second and their centers growing wetter with every touch. Santana, currently on top, snaked a hand down Brittany's stomach until she reached the small strip of blonde between Brittany's legs. She was absolutely soaking and Santana moaned and nodded in approval as she coated her fingers with the wet warmth.

Brittany inhaled drastically and held her breath there when Santana thrust her fingers into her tight hole. Brittany swung them around again so she was on top and with Santana's fingers moving in and out; Brittany reached her hand down and toyed around the Santana's clit in a circular motion. Brittany was always a teaser, and followed with moving slowly up and down Santana's slit. It took several frustrated grunts from Santana before Brittany pressed two fingers in and moved inside her.

"Huurrffmm." Santana let out, her whole body trembling with pleasure. Brittany smirked.

"You make funny noises during sex." Brittany murmured, her breathing thick from the sensation of Santana's fingers deep inside her.

"Neeh—uuuuurghm." Was all Santana's raspy voice could form but she revenged Brittany by crooking her fingers.

Brittany quivered and moaned loudly, but she soon recovered. Santana crooked them again in the same spot but with a little more twitching Brittany bounced back again. Santana had never been with anyone with better stamina before.

Determined, Santana moved in and out of Brittany faster and pressed her palm against her clit, flexing her bicep as hard as she could. With her whole arm trembling from the flexing the vibrations translated to Brittany's sex and she couldn't defy the pleasure building up inside her any longer. Brittany groaned desperately, one of her hands clenching harder at the sheet and the other picking up the pace at Santana's sex.

"Oh fuck, I'm gonna…" Brittany bit her lip and thrust deep inside Santana, her thumb playing wildly with the clit. She wanted Santana to cum with her but she couldn't hold on much longer.

Santana was just as close as Brittany and had to concentrate to keep her motioning going between Brittany's legs. With a third finger added inside and Brittany tightening hard around them, Santana screamed out when Brittany's fingers hit the right spot inside her. Hearing her name escape from Santana had the Brittany exploding.

"Santanaaah." Brittany's voice was loud and desperate at first but faded into heaving breathing as she enjoyed the pulsating aftershocks of her mind-blowing orgasm. Brittany was panting with her body pressed against Santana under her. Santana's lips formed a smile against Brittany's temple as she too tried to come down from her monumental peak.

"Good freakin' morning." Brittany beamed and lifted her head slightly to kiss Santana's lips.

"We should wake up like this more often." Santana said with a dorky smile on her lips and her head up in the clouds.

"We should." Brittany agreed and felt a little guilty about usually not sticking around come morning time. She kissed Santana again.

"What do you mean funny noises?" Santana suddenly remembered and playfully smacked one of Brittany's butt cheeks as she asked. Brittany giggled and rolled off, moving her body so she ended up lying on her side, close to Santana and facing her.

"Just like really adorable, sexy noises." Brittany teased. She loved those noises.

"Oh yeah? Well, you… youuu…" Santana couldn't think of anything to tease back with. Brittany smiled and shook her head as she leaned in for another kiss, which Santana tried to fight with a fake pout, but gave in with a sigh and parted her lips to kiss back.

When Brittany rested her head back on the pillow and looked at Santana with so much warmth in her eyes, Santana felt a little courage creep up inside her. She still hadn't asked yet.

"What… uhm… do you have plans on the 18th …" Santana asked softly with eyes flickering around the room.

"The 18th has already been." Brittany chuckled.

"I mean of August." Santana clarified and Brittany thought for a second.

"Oh. No… I don't think so, why?" Brittany answered with a smile. Santana had put off asking for weeks now and every time she came home to Emma without an answer, Emma's panic grew bigger and bigger. Santana wanted to ask but for some reason it was so hard.

Maybe it was because they hadn't been seeing each other for very long and going to a wedding together felt like a very 'committed' thing to do. Santana didn't know where she and Brittany stood; they hadn't really talked about it. Whenever they were together everything felt so amazing and perfect, but as soon as they parted Brittany's odd behaviour had Santana wondering how Brittany really felt. Maybe Santana was afraid of getting stood up; Brittany's track record wasn't the best.

"No reason." Santana explained away but felt her cheeks heat up. Brittany shrugged casually.

"Kay. Are you hungry?" Brittany asked instead. Maybe she sensed Santana closing up.

"Starving." Santana answered and rubbed her tummy. She was actually very hungry, her morning apatite was unbelievable.

"Sit tight." Brittany pecked Santana's lips once more before getting out of bed and walked out of the room completely naked.

Santana couldn't believe the ass on that girl, it was so freaking perfect. So was her whole body actually. Santana had never seen anything so sexy and beautiful. She loved Brittany's shapes and her complexion and her freckles and her scars. Everything was just so… Brittany.

Santana didn't have time to think about much else before Brittany appeared in the door again. She was carrying a silver tray with orange juice, croissants, a bowl of raspberries and freshly whipped cream. There was also a vase with one red rose in it. Holding the tray, Brittany's breasts and nipples were covered, but her lower lady parts were still visible.

Had she done everything naked? The idea amused Santana. Brittany being so comfortable with her body and walking around like it was the most natural thing in the world was refreshing to Santana, who was so used to Emma freaking out if Santana even walked naked from the shower to her room. Santana loves Emma to death but they don't always see eye to eye.

"Britt, do you always walk around the house with your blonde just all up in people's business?" Santana asked with a smirk.

"What? You got a problem with my lady fur, huh, Baldie von Waxaton?" Brittany joked and Santana could tell that Brittany was only kidding but she still felt a little tingle of panic that Brittany might have taken her statement the wrong way.

"What? No! No, you know I like it." Santana assured and even though she tried to sound sexy she was pretty sure it just came out apologetic and scared.

"Oh yeah? Prove it." Brittany smirked and put the tray down on the nightstand.

Santana smirked right back and rose to her knees in the bed. She walked to the edge and reached her arms out to wrap around the warm body in front of her. She pulled Brittany close and her face dove between Brittany's breasts, kissing and sucking at the flesh. She made her way down lower but when she was down by the belly button; Santana's ass was once against pressed against the mattress and reaching lower would just put her in a very unsexy position.

So she kissed upwards again and after taking Brittany's bottom lip in her mouth she stood up from off the bed and pushed Brittany down on it instead. Brittany lay flat on her back with her legs hanging off the edge of the bed. Santana grabbed a spoon of the freshly whipped cream and splattered it on Brittany's lower abdomen and mound.

Brittany flinched and filled her lungs emergently with air in reaction to the cold cream on her body. Santana hesitated for a second but was reassured when she saw the aroused look on Brittany's face - and that whipped cream wasn't the only sticky mess by Brittany's sex. She trailed the spoon around the thighs as well, leaving plenty for her to lick up.

Then Santana got down on her knees in front of the bed and moved her lips up, one leg at a time. The heavy cream was filling her up pretty fast but she couldn't get enough of what she was doing. After licking, and cleaning up all around on Brittany's thighs and stomach, Santana was moving in on Brittany's center. She trailed her tongue from Brittany's hipbone to her cushion top and kissed open mouthed over the area.

She felt the strip of hair under her tongue and lips, and in reaction Santana moaned and pressed her face down harder on Brittany's sex. When Santana moved down lower to the folds, Brittany placed a hand on the Santana's head; her fingers disappearing into the dark hair. Brittany lifted her upper body slightly and supported herself with an elbow.

Watching what Santana was doing made her feel it ten times more intensely, and she thought it was the sexiest thing she had ever seen. With her jaw dropped and eyes watching intently Brittany moaned from deep down in her throat when Santana reached her entrance and dipped inside. As Santana started thrusting inside, Brittany couldn't help but tilt her head back in pleasure. Then she remembered how much she liked to watch and lifted it again.

Santana moved her tongue higher again, running it flat up Brittany's folds several times before drawing circles around the throbbing clit. Santana, loving to be down there, moaned almost as much and it sent vibrations through Brittany's entire body and caused her to buck her hips against Santana's face.

While still tending to Brittany's clit with her tongue Santana lifted one of her hands and let in run from Brittany's tight abs and lower. When it rested just above Brittany's sex Santana wrapped her lips around the clit and sucked on it while flicking it with her tongue.

Brittany, going crazy with pleasure, threw her whole body back against the mattress and her other hand found its way into Santana's hair as well. The groans escaping both girls' lips were getting louder and louder and Santana felt Brittany's legs and abdomen clench tighter. She moved her tongue lower and started thrusting in and out of Brittany again while letting her hand take over at Brittany's pink nub.

"Oh Go-uh, keep going!" Brittany breathed with a voice sounding almost as if in agony. Santana had no intension of stopping. She loved Brittany's sweet juices in her mouth. Instead she started going faster and whirled her tongue lustier.

"Mmmm, yes, yeah, right there." A breath. " So good" Two breaths. " it's so good, it's so g…-" Brittany's words got caught in her throat as her whole body tightened and she clenched hard around Santana's magic tongue. She had to concentrate to not force Santana's head into her sex with all her strength as she pressed the side of her own face into the mattress.

She twitched rampantly while also struggling to keep breathing. Santana smiled and licked up everything she could come over but when Brittany somewhat relaxed her body Santana withdrew, climbed up on the bed and straddled Brittany.

"That was… you're… amazing." Brittany uttered, her hands sliding over the smooth skin on Santana's thighs, while still trying to catch her breath.

"Be my girlfriend?" Santana blurted but threw her hand over her mouth as a reaction to her own words. Where did that come from? Santana's panicking eyes looked down and expected to see the same reaction emanating from Brittany's. She was surprised to find nothing but love in Brittany's eyes and a shy smile playing on her lips.

When Brittany didn't answer right away Santana felt herself getting more insecure again.

"Look, no pressure, you don't have t…-" Santana began, and started getting off Brittany to wash away some embarrassment and humiliation, but she was interrupted by Brittany's strong arms around her waist, pulling her down on top of Brittany.

"Yes. Yes! I'd love to!" Brittany finally chirped in Santana's ear. Santana felt a thousand lbs lighter, she could breathe again.

"You would?" Santana asked just to hear Brittany confirm it again.

"Uh-huh, very much so." Santana heard the words and felt the nod against the side of her face. It was like the most amazing feeling. She had to lift her head and look at Brittany. Their smiles could melt Antarctica.

"Good... 'cause I was also wondering if maybe you'd like to go with me to Emma's wedding?" Santana asked, making sure her voice didn't tremble. So much in just one morning. Her heart was beating so fast and she searched for something in Brittany's face to indicate anything alarming. But Brittany looked so peaceful and calm and... happy.

"The 18th?" Brittany asked with a crooked smile and Santana nodded bashfully.

"I'd be honoured." Brittany answered with her eyes sparkling. Santana hugged Brittany and lowered her head to the crook of her neck. She was so ecstatic with Brittany's answers... but a tiny detail gnawed in her mind.

"And if, you know, something comes up I guess that's fine but I can't speak for Emma. She'll probably unleash her wild wrath on yo…-"

"Nothing will come up!" Brittany ensured in a blurt and placed her hands of the side of Santana's face, pulling her up from the crook of her neck and looking deep into the dark brown eyes. They displayed pure relief.

"Not anymore. I promise." Brittany said in a lower but equally sure voice and pulled Santana in for a kiss.


	9. Chapter 9

I am very happy report that we're getting closer to solving the big mystery too, yay! But there are many pieces to the puzzle and they won't drop all at once. Also this chapter - not my proudest moment and sadly; filler alert… But tell you what, you're so awesome that I feel bad not giving away much in this one, so I'm gonna update again tomorrow instead of day after.. Sound good?

Oh and also – did I mention you're awesome?

**CHAPTER 9**

**"August 18th"**

Santana looked down at her dress again. The pale purple color went really well with the lilies and white interior of the church. It was getting crowded as more and more people took a seat on the benches. Santana felt like she was more nervous than Emma, who was coping quite well in a little room in the back.

Santana only meant to slip out for a second to greet Brittany since she barely knew anyone else here. But she was late and the more time Santana spent fidgeting in front of the big door waiting for Brittany to arrive, the more nervous she got that she wouldn't show up at all.

A light head made her way up the stone stairs. Not Brittany. Santana really thought this shit was over. The last three weeks of their relationship had been so great. Brittany hadn't cancelled on her even once and ever since that first morning at Brittany's place; she had stopped sneaking out in the middle of the night. Santana felt like she was practically living in Brittany's apartment and Brittany spoiled her rotten.

"What the fuck, Britt?" Santana grunted between her teeth as she started pacing back and forth to do something with her nervous energy.

"What?" Santana heard a familiar voice behind her back. She turned around and was finally met with Brittany's beautiful blue eyes.

"You're here!" Santana sighed as if relieved and Brittany could tell she had caused a scare.

"I'm sorry! I was totally on time and then I remembered I didn't have a gift for Emma and Noah." Brittany excused herself and gave Santana a smile as Santana was trying her best not to return it. That was impossible of course.

"You look absolutely gorgeous! I thought bridesmaid's dresses were supposed to be ugly?" Brittany chuckled and had Santana crack up too.

"Do you wanna meet a few people?"

"Dying to." Brittany beamed and Santana joined their hands and guided her through the church to the very front where Puck was waiting for the ceremony to start. On their way they waved to Mercedes who politely waved back. Puck was cracking dirty jokes with his two best men. Classy.

"Hey Puck!" Santana said when they were only a few feet away. Noah turned his attention to the girls and his eyes shot straight to Brittany.

"Is this the girl you won't shut up about?" Puck grinned and reached his hand out to shake Brittany's. Brittany shook it and silly smiles spread across both girls' faces as Santana made the introductions. Santana had met some of Brittany's friends the week before and honestly, they both loved showing that they were together.

"Puck, this is Brittany - my girlfriend. Brittany, this is Puck - Emma's soon to be husband." Santana winked at Noah whose face lit up at the thought. He really did love Emma so very much. Santana's heart warmed when she thought about the happy couple. And then Puck ruined it.

"Hot." He said and looked back and forth between the two ladies.

"Urgh, Puck! You're such a sleaze!" Santana said annoyed.

"Hey, which one's the dude?" He smirked.

"There is no dude! That's the whole point." Santana sighed.

"Yeah but like, who wears the strap-on?" Puck just wanted to tease Santana. He felt like they had sort of a brother-sister-relationship and he couldn't really read how sick Santana was actually getting of his jokes.

"That's none of your business!" Santana shot at him, maybe a little too loudly, and then she grabbed a Brittany's hand. She started leading the giggling woman up the aisle again to find her a good seat.

"… and we both do." Santana muttered to herself when she was far away enough that Puck wouldn't hear her. But Brittany did, she laughed and squeezed Santana's hand tighter.

Santana figured she would let Brittany sit next to Mercedes, who technically she had met before. Plus, Mercedes had a seat on the second row and Santana wanted Brittany as close as possible. Before she could motion for Brittany to have a seat though, Santana saw three very familiar faces coming towards them. She tugged on Brittany's hand and approached the group.

"Mom! Dad!" Santana smiled and embraced both her parents at the same time.

"Hey!" A younger replica of Santana uttered in an offended tone.

"Carmen! Just saving the best for last." Santana smirked and hugged her little sister - who wasn't little at all anymore. With 16 she was really growing into the Lopez chest.

"You came!" Santana beamed when she pulled away from the hug.

"Of course we came! Emma is like our third daughter!" Santana's father stated and smiled proudly. Santana's family still lived in Ohio and they said they would come, but Santana wasn't sure they actually would, so she was really happy to see them. Skype is great and all but it's nothing like the real thing. Seeing her family mostly made Santana smile, but she also felt a little sad that she didn't get to see them very often.

Santana was shaken from her thoughts as she suddenly realized Brittany was still standing shyly behind her. She turned around and motioned for he girlfriend to step into the circle.

"Brittany, this is my mom, my dad and my baby-sister Carmen." Santana said and pointed to each one as she introduced them, even though it was fairly obvious which one was which.

"This is Brittany, m-my, my…-" Santana choked on the word when she saw the anticipation in her parent's eyes. Why was it so hard to say all of a sudden? She panicked and turned her eyes to Brittany.

"Santana's girlfriend." Brittany filled in and gave Santana an amorous glance as she reached her hand out to greet every member of Santana's family. The faces of all three Lopezes lit up; they hadn't met one of Santana's romantic interests since high school.

"Very nice to meet you, dear." Santana's mother said and stole a quick hug. Brittany was surprised but hugged back and even blushed a little when the older woman let go of her and flashed her with the most loving smile. Santana grabbed her father's thick wrist and looked at his watch.

"I really have to get back to Emma now!" Santana stated apologetically. She turned to Brittany.

"Will you be okay, babe?" She asked and studied Brittany's face carefully.

"Yeah, fine. Go!" Brittany smiled. She was nervous about being left alone with Santana's family, but the butterflies in her stomach felt good. Santana kissed Brittany's cheek and squeezed her arm lovingly before rushing out of the main hall and into the little room in the back.

Brittany turned to the family and smiled shyly. She wasn't sure what to say or what to do. Does she sit with them or do they part here? Luckily, Carmen wasn't shy at all and grabbed Brittany by the arm and led her to their seats in the very front.

"I've heard a lot about you, Britt." Carmen said and flashed a crooked smile.

"Likewise." Britt smiled back, glad to be so well received.

"Really? What's she said about me?" Carmen wanted to know.

"Just how much she loves you." Brittany assured.

"Hm, funny."

"What?"

"Nothing." Carmen dismissed it casually but she still had a playful smirk on her lips.

.-.

"Maid of honour moment!" Santana called as she entered the room and motioned for everyone else to leave. The other bridesmaid looked a little offended but knew better than to argue with Santana. A group of other friends were already leaving to take their seats anyway so with one last proud glance at Emma and then walked out.

"Santana!" Emma exclaimed, and was relieved that her friend was back.

"You nervous, sweetheart?"

"No. No I've never felt more calm and serene in my entire life. I've wanted this for so long now, why would I be nervous? I don't even care that there's a stain on that table over there." There was nothing sarcastic in Emma's tone but the high-pitch voice and the speed of her words let Santana know that she was actually being tortured by her nerves.

"Okay, maybe I care just a little." Emma said, throwing herself over to the table and started rubbing a paper towel against the stain.

"Babe?" No answer. "Babe." No answer. "Babe!" Santana repeated and had to pry Emma away from the table.

"Honey, look at me!" Santana called a lot higher than intended but she got the redhead's attention. There were several seconds of just intense staring but the deep brown orbs of Santana had the redhead's pulse slow down and her breath to sooth. Seeing Emma calm down Santana thought maybe her friend was ready for words.

"You're marrying the man you love. And you look absolutely stunning! So, so gorgeous!"

"Really?"

"Yes!" Santana nodded her head.

"I'm just really, really nervous! I've never loved anyone more than I love Noah."

"I know the feeling." Santana said coyly and looked into the ginger woman's eyes. They knew exactly who Santana was referring to. "Isn't it awesome, though?" Santana added and stroked comforting over Emma's cheek, but careful to not mess up the make-up.

"Is she here?" Emma smiled and got a little excited about finally get a chance to talk to the woman who had stolen her best friend's heart.

"Yeah, she's here." Santana nodded and couldn't hold back a ridiculous grin.

"I'm glad." Emma confirmed and took Santana's hands in hers. "Look at us, huh?"

Santana laughed a little and tightened her grip on Emma's hands.

"I'm gonna tell her." Santana blurted suddenly. Emma just gave Santana a questioning look.

"That I love her." Santana filled in, her whole body radiating with happiness.

"Don't steal my thunder." Emma joked lovingly. Santana flinched.

"No, no, no! I didn't mean like that. I just thought the whole wedding scenery would be romantic and I've been thinking it for a while now but I always chicken out... But today is about you!" Santana nodded.

"I mean look at you, no one can pry thunder away from that." Santana said with a smile and gestured her hands in a circular motion over Emma's chest. Emma didn't even bother to call her out on it, she was too damn happy. They smiled at each other for a while until the music started playing and they knew it was time.

"You ready?" Santana asked with a crooked smile.

"Like never before." Emma answered as Santana took her under the arm to walk her down the aisle.

Santana couldn't believe Emma's moment was finally here. She had gone through a lot to get here and to not have her parents here must be so hard, but the redhead was so much stronger than first glance might suggest. And even though Puck could be an ass hole there was no one in the world who made Emma happier.

Santana was so proud to be the one to give Emma away and then to be one standing in the maid of honour spot. Emma's other bridesmaid, Terri, was a real pain in the ass and Santana could barely stand being in the same room as her. Since they were first introduced they had been fighting for the title of Emma's best friend and Santana finally felt like she had won.

As a bonus, Terri was already drunk out of her mind and flirted shamelessly with both of Puck's best men standing across from them. That sleaze ball Artie flirted back, but the Asian guy… What was his name again? Mike! ... kept his eyes on the couple the whole time. Santana's eyes couldn't help but roam around the room.

She looked at Mercedes, who didn't even know Emma that well, but was still sobbing into a handkerchief. Drama queen. She looked at her parents and saw so much pride in their eyes that she could have fooled herself to believe that she was the one getting married up here.

Then she looked at her girlfriend. Santana thought Brittany stood out from all of the rest. She just brightened the whole room with her smile and her eyes. Santana was going to turn her gaze back to Emma but it was like Brittany felt Santana's eyes on her because her gaze flickered, she found Santana's eyes and locked them in place to meet her stare.

"Do you, Noah, take Emma, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?" The reverend asked.

"I do." Puck answered and you could hear the smile on his lips. The reverend turned her head.

"Do you, Emma, take Noah, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better – for worse, for richer – for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?"

"I do." Emma said lovingly. Santana heard them but she couldn't take her eyes off Brittany. For the whole exchange of vows Santana and Brittany stared at each other. It wasn't until Santana realized she had to give Emma the ring that she tore her gaze away from Brittany. She felt her cheeks heat up.

Brittany felt the same, she had been forced to clench her jaw super hard to not mouth the 'I do' to Santana when Emma said it. Brittany couldn't believe how fast everything was happening between her and Santana and how good it felt. Brittany couldn't be happier that Santana was hers. Brittany almost missed Santana despite the fact that they were in the same room. She wanted to be closer, she wanted to hear Santana's voice, touch her skin... dance with her. Brittany wished time could move faster so they could get to the reception.

Be careful what you wish for, Brittany…

* * *

><p>About the Lopez chest, Santana didn't have summer surgery in this story ;)<p> 


	10. Chapter 10

Here we are... the update I promised you :)

**CHAPTER 10**

**"Sugar-coat this"**

"Is it bad that I think you're more beautiful than the bride?" Brittany whispered in Santana's ear as Artie got up to give Puck a speech.

"No…" Santana beamed. "But don't tell anyone." She added and kissed Brittany's cheek. Neither was particularly interested in what Artie had to say so they kept whispering and cuddling for the whole duration of his dull speech.

When he was finally done it was time for Emma and Puck's first dance. Emma was really nervous about it. Being in front of all those people with everyone watching her was unnerving and when going up there, she sought Santana's eyes for comfort. Santana gave Emma safety and warmth through her gaze and every time Emma turned her head to look at her friend, she still had her focus on the redhead. The music started playing and the couple started moving. Puck wasn't a bad dancer and Emma looked so light when she moved with him.

"They look so happy." Brittany whispered.

"They are." Santana said and kept staring at her friend up there. A warm and fuzzy feeling filled her up and her eyes were magnetically forced to look at Brittany.

"So am I." She added softly and was met with Brittany's eyes. Geez, those things get bluer with every time. Brittany fumbled under the table and found Santana's hand. Their fingers interlocked and with a tight squeeze they both turned their heads back to look at Emma and Puck.

As soon as other couples started joining in the dancing Brittany quickly rose to her feet.

"May I have this dance?" Brittany asked and tried to sound formal but her face couldn't hold back that huge smile Santana had gotten so used to, and loved so much.

"You're a dork, but yes, you may." Santana said and already holding hands she let herself be helped up from the chair.

They walked together to the dance floor and Brittany twirled Santana around as they got on it. As soon as Brittany pulled Santana close it was like the rest of the room faded away and they were the only ones left. They swayed together, cheek to cheek. Brittany was so smooth and she smelled so good. She danced without effort and her hold on Santana soothed them both.

"Mind if I cut in?" Santana recognized the voice instantly. It was Artie and he made it clear he wanted to dance with Brittany since he refused to take his eyes off her. _Man whore,_ Santana thought. She wasn't sure how to respond so she looked for Brittany's eyes to see if she knew how to handle the situation. Brittany plastered on a polite smile.

"If it's okay with my girlfriend…?" Brittany answered softly and waited for a reaction from Santana to see if she approved or not.

"Actually I think I want you for myself a little bit longer." Santana said with a smirk and before she knew it, Brittany had danced them away to a different part of the dance floor, leaving Artie with a pile of rejection. They didn't dance for much longer though before Brittany felt a tap on her shoulder. She was just about to sigh as if irritated when she caught a glance of who it was that wanted their attention.

"Mr. Lopez? Do you wanna dance with your beautiful daughter?" Brittany asked and offered Santana's hand to him.

"Any friend of Santana's calls me Álvaro." Mr. Lopez said and smiled. "And no, I want to dance with you."

"Oh." Brittany felt super nervous and smiled insecurely while she nodded yes.

"Dad!" Santana interjected. "You don't have to, B." Santana assured but it wasn't that Brittany didn't want to, she was just nervous.

"No, of course!" She said, and with some mustered up confidence she slipped her hand out of Santana's and into Álvaro's. Santana wasn't convinced but she felt it could be a good opportunity to check on Mercedes. She had barely said two words to her friend all day.

"Alright... Come and find me later, baby?" Santana said to Brittany and gave her father a look that said don't embarrass me. Brittany nodded and then let Mr. Lopez move her on the dance floor. Santana found Mercedes and sat down in a chair next to her. Santana was still in Brittany's sight and it was hard for her to look at Álvaro, and not stare over his shoulder.

"You're an excellent dancer, Brittany." Álvaro complimented and Brittany giggled shyly.

"You're not so bad yourself, Sir." Upon hearing the words Mr. Lopez twirled Brittany around and even though she wasn't prepared for that one, she handled it gracefully. When she spun back into Álvaro's arms he had a different look on his face.

"You know, Brittany... Santana doesn't do this very often." His voice was serious, Brittany could tell, but she still frowned a little in confusion since she didn't really understand.

"Open her heart." He clarified. "I've watched you two today and I can tell she cares deeply about you."

"And I about her." Brittany said quickly. She knew where this was going.

"I'm her father, I have to look out for her. She's still my baby girl, you know." Álvaro's eyes shimmered with love and Brittany's polite smile turned amorous when she thought of a baby photo she had seen of her girlfriend. Big brown eyes and chubby baby cheeks in a little onesie with a huge diaper underneath.

"She's had her heart broken before." Mr. Lopez stated and brought the serious mood back upon them. Brittany nodded understandingly.

"Don't hurt her."

"That's the last thing I wanna do, Sir." Brittany ensured and felt the truth of that pulsating through her body until it had reached every limb.

"Well then, I trust you."

The dance ended and Álvaro bowed his head politely before excusing himself to find his lovely wife. Brittany's eyes naturally searched for her girlfriend and found her quickly, still by Mercedes's side. Before they had looked like they had a good time and laughed a lot but now their faces grew grumpier and grumpier and Brittany feared that she would soon have to break up another fight.

"I want to meet Emma now." Brittany interjected to Santana in what turned out to be a very heated argument about who had the hottest girlfriend. Brittany spotted the redhead and husband from across the room and dragged Santana with her to greet them. Santana threw glances back at Mercedes who was making faces in Santana's direction.

"Hi, I'm Brittany!" Brittany chirped to Emma and extended her arm to shake hands. Emma was so happy to finally get a chance to greet Brittany properly that she didn't even care that she wasn't wearing her gloves when their skins touched.

"Santana has told us so much about you! I'm Emma and this is my husband Noah!" She smiled at Noah as she said it. Everyone at the reception had obviously seen them getting married so it wasn't like a clarification of that sort was necessary but she just loved how easily the words rolled off her tongue.

"We met earlier." Brittany said and smiled at Puck.

"How are you lovebirds feeling?" Santana asked after she decided to let the Mercedes face-off fight-off go, and join in the conversation.

"It's awesome!" Puck stated and put his arm around Emma who hugged his grip around her waist.

"Well, you are the most beautiful bride I've ever seen." Brittany chirped, with politeness as well as sincerity in her voice.

"Really?" Emma asked and Santana smiled at how she had to ask every time. Brittany just nodded in response and watched how Emma's smile grew bigger.

"Thank God, because it's not a particularity comfortable dress." Emma joked and squirmed in the white gown, it was really quite itchy.

"I can't wait to take it off." Puck shared with everyone and nuzzled up by Emma's ear. Emma blushed enormously at his statement.

"Okay, that's enough!" Santana half-joked. She thought they were adorable but didn't like images of heterosexual intercourse seeping into her mind.

"I almost forgot!" Brittany blurted suddenly and reached into her tiny purse. She pulled out a white envelope.

"Santana told me you guys were holding off on going on your honeymoon until you can properly afford it but I just think everyone deserves a honeymoon. That's the best part right?" Brittany said as she handed the gift over to Emma and Puck. The couple was blindsided by the generosity and they both gasped for air when they opened the envelope.

"Oh… oh… no. This is too much." Emma said coyly.

"No, no, no!" Brittany said and started backing away when the couple tried to hand it back to her. Emma followed but instead of forcing the envelope back in Brittany hand she wrapped her arms around her neck and hugged her. Santana's jaw dropped. In her years of being the redhead's closest friend she had never seen that happen. She filled with warmth when she realized how welcome Brittany was in all aspects of her life.

"Thank you so much." Puck said and shook Brittany's hand vigorously when his wife had let go of her. "This one's a keeper!" He said, looking at Santana, and followed it with a wink. Santana returned it with the most loving smile he had ever gotten from her.

"You're welcome!" Brittany beamed. "But now I really have to pee." Brittany added and looked around like she expected a toilet to fall from the ceiling.

"I know where it is." Santana said and intertwined her fingers with Brittany's. As they made their way across the room Santana loved every pair of eyes on them. It's not like they were the center of attention or anything, people were dancing and drinking and having fun, but they got a couple of glances. Santana didn't care if people were thinking good things or bad things, just the fact that both her and Brittany were in one person's mind at the same time made her feel even more with Brittany.

"You're amazing!" Santana said when they were out of the hotel's celebration hall and walking towards the bathrooms further away in the hallway. Brittany stopped them. With a light push she had Santana against the wall and kissed her lips gingerly.

"You're the most amazing thing in my life." Brittany responded with a shy smile when she pulled away from the kiss. Santana's eyes sparkled.

"Brittany, I… I lo – "

"J-BIRD?" A high pitch-voice echoed through the empty hallway. A woman in a bright pink pant suit, orange accessories, light-brown-reddish hair and a silver headband approached them quickly.

"What's a J-bird?" Santana whispered to Brittany, who seemed to be the one the woman had zeroed in on. Brittany wanted to answer but the explanation was a little long and the woman was now too close to allow it.

"Sugar?" Brittany's face filled up with panic. "W-what are you doing here?" She asked nervously. Sugar? Why did that sound awfully familiar to Santana?

"Business." Sugar answered casually with a shrug. Then she furrowed her eyebrows and turned her head to Santana. "Who are you?" She asked in the bitchiest voice Santana had ever heard.

"Excu…" Santana started to bitch back but was interrupted by Brittany.

"Santana, this is Sugar. Sugar, this is… Santana."

"That's Santana?" Sugar asked and looked at the woman by Brittany's side like she wanted to barf.

"Please don't." Brittany's voice was commanding but she looked at Sugar with big helpless eyes. Sugar took a breath, pursed her lips and tried to hold back the tears burning in her eyes.

"Whatever." Sugar tried her best to sound carefree but it didn't come out like that at all. She turned to Santana again. "You can have her." She spat and started walking away.

"What the hell was that all about?" Santana asked confused.

"Santana, not here with all the people…" Brittany begged. Santana snorted. What people? Apart from herself, Brittany and heels clicking more distantly each time, the hallway was still empty. It was true that anyone could just pass by and interrupt but Santana wasn't gonna let some richy bitch treat her like that and not know why, so she grabbed Brittany by the wrist and lead her into the bathroom.

"Okay, what's up with bitch-face?" She asked after she checked all the stalls and learned that they were empty.

"She was just upset." Brittany explained and fidgeted with her bracelet. She really didn't want to talk about this. One, she still wasn't allowed to and two, there's no way this would just slip easily past her fiery tempered girlfriend. Everything had been so perfect just five minutes ago.

"Why?" Santana persisted.

"She's… sort of an ex-girlfriend." Brittany sighed. There was no way out of this one without lying and she wouldn't lie. She felt like crap last time and no, she wouldn't do it again. She couldn't.

"She was acting awfully psycho for an ex." Santana shrugged.

"I broke up with her pretty recently." Brittany said quietly.

"Oh." Santana was about to let it go when suddenly she started connecting the dots.

"Sugar. On the phone. At the shelter. Wait! How recently?" Santana asked with her eye brows raised.

"Three…" Please say months, please say months, please say months! "…weeks." Brittany stared at the floor.

"Oh my God!" Santana couldn't breathe.

"Santana, it's not what you think…-" Brittany tried to start an explanation.

"So when we met, and out first date, and all the other dates you were - oh God - all the times you cancelled and rescheduled, and showed up late, urrgh, it's because you were with someone else? With Ms. Color-me-crazy out there?" Santana got more and more furious by the second and Brittany just shook her head in an apologetic manner. She had so much to explain but she didn't know where to start.

"All the times you snuck out of my apartment you were going home to fuck her!" Santana almost screamed. Santana wanted to throw up. She felt like she also wanted to cry but her body didn't seem to know how, and wrath just took over.

"No! No, I didn't do that! It was part of it but I didn't..." Brittany said, still in a quiet tone, her big blue eyes piercing through Santana.

"What? You want a medal or something?" Santana said spitefully.

"No, I didn't mean it like that, but since you… I didn't with her…"

"Then why didn't you just break up with her, huh?"

"I wanted to, but I couldn't… And I didn't know how you felt…-" Brittany grunted, frustrated that Santana wasn't listening and furious with herself for having let this happen.

"You wanna know how I feel?" Santana asked, her tone still harsh. Brittany's tears got too heavy and fell down her cheeks.

"I feel hurt." Santana's choice of words made Brittany writhe in agony. Fifteen minutes after Santana's father had told her not to hurt his daughter she did just that. Santana's heart tore at the sight of a tortured Brittany but Santana wasn't finished.

"I feel betrayed… Heartbroken." Santana continued. Her face was radiating pain but her but her tone was cold.

"But I did break up with her! I wasn't supposed to but I did because I…-" Brittany pleaded with more tears streaming down her face.

"She calls you J-bird? What is that? Some sort of cute, disgusting insider thing only you two get?" Santana interrupted.

"She thinks I'm…-" Brittany tried to answer Santana's question and if she would just get to finish one stupid sentence…!

"You lied to me." Santana cut in again with a blank stare.

"I'm so, so sorry but please listen to me!" Brittany didn't bother to wipe the tears away.

"I can't do this… I have to go." Santana shook her head while saying it and turned around to push the door open.

"No, Santana! You can't leave!" Brittany begged. Santana stopped and turned around furiously again.

"I can do anything I want to, baby. I ain't the one who cheated." She walked out, leaving a sobbing Brittany alone in the bathroom.


	11. Chapter 11

First of all – wow! I woke up today and I almost started to cry. Happy tears, from having gotten so many reviews for one chapter, it was a record for me. Maybe I'm just emotional because I'm on my period... oversharing! But seriously – thank you! You're so sweet and invested and it just makes my heart shoot dancing orangutans. (That's a good thing.)

**CHAPTER 11**

**"Why won't you listen?"**

Santana half-ran down the hallway towards the exit. The stupid heels slowed her down but when she heard Brittany call her name from behind her she took a gamble and picked up the pace anyway. The very peak of humiliation would be if she fell down on her face right now. But she couldn't slow down. She heard Brittany's voice getting closer.

Santana slammed her body against the revolving doors and pushed herself out. Behind her, three tourists crammed themselves in, blocking Brittany's path. She stood and waited for a while before realizing that it only wasted precious seconds. She looked around and then charged at the regular door next to the revolving ones.

At first Brittany didn't see Santana anywhere but then, further down the street she saw her hale a cab. Brittany hurried her steps but she wasn't fast enough. When the cab pulled up, Santana rendered it open and threw herself inside. She slammed the door shut with everything she had. It felt good to get rid of some angry energy. She saw Brittany still approaching so just like in the movies she told the driver to just "go!"

When Brittany knew she couldn't stop Santana she slowed down again. She just stared at the cab until it disappeared in the murmur of a hundred more yellow cars. Santana didn't look back. She didn't even say good bye to Emma, who thanks to Brittany was going on her honeymoon early the next morning. She didn't say good bye to her family either, but Carmen told her earlier that they were staying for a few more days so maybe that wasn't so bad.

"Hey, lady! Where you going?" Santana was shaken from her thoughts by the cab driver's voice. She told her address and continued to stare out the window. She ignored every attempt the man tried at making small talk and he soon got the hint.

How could Brittany do this, how? More importantly how could Santana not have seen it? It was so obvious! Right there in front of her. How could she not even have suspected that? No one behaves like that if they don't have someone else on the side. Well, guess Santana was the side in this case. Santana clenched her fist. Everything felt too familiar.

She wondered how long Brittany and Sugar had been together before she came along. How many special dates had they gone on? How much fun had they had together? How much… how much Brittany loved Sugar? J-bird is a stupid nickname anyways! It makes no sense!

The cab pulled up and Santana handed the driver some money and got out. Her steps were light today too. This time for a very different reason. Santana was boiling. She had so much energy. So much energy that as soon as she got inside she ripped the dress off and threw on some sweats. She pulled out her jogging shoes and crammed her feet in them. She laced them tight, tugging on the strings until her knuckles turned white.

Before going out she decided to send Emma a text. She had promised to not steal her thunder and she didn't want to ruin Emma's wedding day. She decided to not tell Emma what was going on just yet. She deserved a really romantic honeymoon and she couldn't have that if she knew Santana was upset. Emma worried too much. Santana would just say that something came up. As soon as she thought it, she wanted to vomit. She hated those words. She had hated them before and now all the hatred in the world wouldn't even begin to describe her dismay of them.

She found her phone in her purse and pulled it out. She had thirteen texts and twenty-four missed calls. All from Brittany. How did she even have time to try that many times? Santana decided to not open a single one of the texts, and calling back was certainly out of the question. Her fingers typed fast.

**Hey babe! Minor setback at the hotel. Had to go.  
><strong>**If I don't see you before your honeymoon just  
><strong>**know that I love you and I'm so, so happy for  
><strong>**you, sweetheart!**

Santana knew it was vague but she hoped the redhead would be on enough of a high to not care too much. She pressed send and then she turned her phone off. She also had the urge to throw the phone against the wall but she just bought it pretty recently and she'd feel bad wasting money like that.

Instead she focused her energy on slamming the door and running down the stairs. When she got to the street she contemplated which way to run. Which way would most easily take her mind off everything? Left?

About two minutes after she turned the corner a black BMW pulled up in such a speed it almost rammed the fire hydrant on the sidewalk. Brittany stormed out of her car and pressed the button to ring the bell to Santana's apartment. Santana didn't buzz her in. Fuck, she couldn't remember the stupid code! She had been here so many times before! Something with a five? Five-four-seven-eight. The door remained locked. Four-seven-eight-five. She still wasn't let in. She kicked the door in frustration and then she rang the door bell again. Nothing. Brittany backed away and looked up at Santana's window.

"Come on, Santana! I know you're there! Just let me in, please!" She shouted at the top of her lungs. A window to an apartment below Santana's opened and an old woman with a white perm stuck her head out.

"Hello, dear!" The old woman called down.

"Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to disturb!" Brittany called back.

"No worries, sweet cheeks! Who are you looking for?" The old woman asked.

"Santana Lopez, she lives above you." Brittany explained, sounding more and more desperate by the second.

"Is it the Hispanic one? She's so pretty."

"Yeah, I know! She's beautiful. I need to talk to her; there's been a huge misunderstanding."

"I'm afraid she ran away."

"What do you mean ran away? Did she have a suitcase or a bag or…?" Brittany felt her panic grow larger. Santana wasn't seriously leave-leaving was she? Brittany really wanted a chance to explain herself.

"Oh no, dear! She went on one of those jogs that you youngsters do." The old woman chuckled and pointed in the direction she had seen her neighbour run.

"Oh… Thank you!" Brittany felt like she could breathe again. Maybe there was a shimmer of hope. Brittany leaned against the brick wall. Should she try and run after? No, that would be like trying to find a needle in a big apple. Brittany sunk down to sit on the ground. She was probably ruining her dress but she didn't care. She would sit here and wait until Santana returned.

.-.

Santana went wherever her feet took her. She didn't know how far she had run but she still wasn't tired. All the anger she had was fuelling her and she couldn't stop. She needed to not stop.

Whenever she saw something that had anything to do with Brittany, a restaurant they had been to, or a street they had walked down or a museum they had gone to, a musical they had seen, she turned in a different direction. She was zigzagging all over the city and even though she was trying to avoid it, it felt a little bit like walking down memory lane.

She hadn't realized how many different things they had done together. Brittany had been in charge of almost every date, and that girl did not like to do the same things twice. When Santana found herself approaching the water she made another turn. Great! Brittany had ruined the ocean for her.

It was getting pretty late, Santana didn't know exactly what time it was but she figured it was around eight o'clock because the sun had begun setting and it would be dark soon. Maybe it was time to go back home again. She liked that the shadows were getting bigger because she was pretty damn hot. This summer had been crazy, one of the warmest in years. Her clothes were pretty much soaked in sweat and she kept wiping her forehead to not have it drip from her face.

When she found herself back on her street she stopped running and started walking. That's when she felt how out of breath she was. Her legs were numb and walking up the stairs would be a world of pain but all she wanted now was to get home.

When she got closer to her door she saw someone sitting next to it with her face buried in her lap. At first Santana dismissed it as just a homeless person but as she got closer she saw the person more clearly. Homeless people don't wear those kinds of dresses. She realized who it was and felt the urge to turn around again, but Brittany heard her steps. Her head shot up and she saw Santana. Brittany rose to her feet just as quickly as her head had popped up and took a couple of steps closer to Santana. Santana stopped, and as a reaction Brittany did as well. She didn't want to scare Santana away.

"Hi…" Brittany started softly.

"I don't want to talk to you." Santana stated and tried to walk around Brittany to get to her door but Brittany grabbed her wrist. Santana instantly pulled it back.

"Don't. Touch me!" She hissed.

"Why won't you listen?" Brittany's eyes were red from crying and pain echoed in her face.

"Because I don't wanna hear it!" Santana was starting to have a hard time being so cold to Brittany, the sight of the tortured blue eyes hurt her more than she wanted to admit. But whatever it was Brittany had to say, she didn't want to know. She knew enough.

"Santana, please just hear me out. I want to explain!" Brittany tried her best to keep her voice strong but it was difficult. Almost too difficult, especially since Santana rejected her with such harshness.

"Explain how you were just looking for someone to fuck when your girlfriend wasn't available?" Santana knew that wasn't one hundred percent true but it was how Brittany had made her feel. Like what the fuck? Was it her destiny to feel like that?

"What? No!" Brittany shook her head on confusion. Why was Santana saying such horrible things?

"Explain how I was just some side dish to your main course?" Santana spat at Brittany who was getting more and more upset. Hearing Santana say those things broke her heart.

"Santana, you have no idea how much was at stake and I couldn't... but then it didn't matter anymore... I broke up with her to be with you. It's not fair that you…-"

"No, what you did was 'not fair'. I have no obligations to you anymore. Just leave me alone." Santana stepped closer to her door and punched in the numbers to open it.

"Santana, I love you! I'm in love with you."

Brittany's words caused Santana to freeze. She heard the door buzz, saying she was allowed to push it open, but Santana stood still in the same spot. She looked down at her feet and then back up at those damn sad eyes.

Brittany moved closer to Santana, one step at a time, encouraged by the fact that the other woman wasn't moving away. With great hesitation Brittany lifted her arms and put them around Santana. She pulled her in close. Santana was sweaty but Brittany didn't care, all she cared about was holding her and feeling how their bodies fit together. She sighed in relief that Santana didn't push her away. Santana was still frozen so she let herself be hugged. She smelled the Brittany's familiar scent and she heard her soothing breaths. But it wasn't enough. She wanted it to be so bad, but it wasn't enough.

"I love you so much." Brittany whispered again and squeezed tighter. Santana's heart wanted to melt at the words but somehow they just made everything worse right now.

"Get off me!" Santana said loudly and shook herself free of the arms wrapped around her. The pain Brittany thought had passed came rushing back and hit her like blow to the face.

"Tell me you don't love me back! Tell me I mean nothing to you!" Brittany shrieked. She knew it was unfair. She had no right to demand that from Santana, and if Santana were to actually say those things her world would come crashing down and crush her. Santana's face morphed into a spiteful frown. She couldn't believe Brittany would ask that of her. Hadn't she hurt her enough?

"Screw you!" Santana hissed and punched in the numbers again. Without giving Brittany a second glance she went inside.

* * *

><p>Oh no… looks like mama turtle is taking the lead on this one – but ya'll hang in there. It's like a crime against nature to give up on Brittana. (Which, me saying that might kill some suspense but it's not like a spoiler alert that I want these two together.)<p> 


	12. Chapter 12

It's Friday! I feel the love! I'm also feeling a bit of frustration and I'm sorry! I thought to myself: What can I do to get these people to like me? Because getting people to like you is what life is all about, right? Right! So what I did was I fired Mama Turtle. She begged me not to because she needs money for her kids' college funds and Papa Turtle can't handle his liquor but I told her; Sorry! I gotta give the people what they want!

**CHAPTER 12**

**"Can't stop"**

God, I hope she likes it! Brittany thought to herself and took another look around Santana's bedroom. Santana refused to see her, she wouldn't take her calls, she wouldn't answer her texts. No matter what Brittany did she couldn't get through. For three days straight Brittany had done nothing but try to contact Santana and get her to talk but it was freakin' mission impossible.

There was so much left to explain. Santana didn't even know half the story yet and with having been constantly interrupted when Brittany tried to talk, it had been so hard to get it out there. This was the one thing left Brittany could think of. Brittany refused to let "screw you" be Santana's last words to her. At least Santana hadn't denied her love for Brittany. That's what Brittany lived on right now. Santana hadn't said that she didn't love Brittany.

* * *

><p>"Honey, you seem distracted?" Santana's mother said gently and reached over the table to place her hand on Santana's. Santana flinched at the touch.<p>

"Huh? No. I'm sorry." Santana shook her head and tried to remember anything her family had talked about.

"Is something bothering you? First you disappear at the wedding and then we can barely reach you for three days…" Santana's father persisted in the same soft voice as the mother.

"No, I'm fine! Let's just enjoy dinner before your flight." Santana tried to make her parents stop asking. She was fine! Okay, so she wasn't fine but she tried to be.

"It's Brittany isn't it?" Carmen blurted. She wasn't exactly known for being subtle. Santana flinched when she heard her lying, cheating _ex-girlfriend's_ name. It was all she could think about all the time but she still wasn't prepared for someone else to bring it up.

"D'you want me to kick her ass?" Carmen joked when Santana didn't answer. She didn't know how serious the situation was but it didn't really matter to her, she just wanted her big sister to laugh. Santana chuckled. Carmen was becoming more and more like her every day. Carmen nudged Santana playfully in the side when Santana still didn't answer. Santana found her sister's eyes and begged for her to drop it. Álvaro caught a look of Santana's pleading eyes and a deep, worried wrinkle formed on his forehead.

"Santana, is something the matter? Did something happen with Brittany?" He asked and he was not kidding around with his worry. Santana saw his face and she just couldn't do this to her parents again.

"What? No, I'm fine. Everything's fine!" Santana ensured and both her parents calmed down. Carmen however raised an eyebrow in suspicion. Every since Santana tricked her into eating an actual piece of dog poop thinking it was chocolate when they were kids, there wasn't a lie Carmen couldn't call her sister out on.

"I have to pee!" Carmen said and stood up. She gave Santana a look but the sister just furrowed her eyebrows questioningly in response.

"I don't know where it is?" Carmen continued to get Santana to come with her.

"It's just through there." Santana said and pointed across the restaurant.

"Nope, not gonna find it." Carmen insisted stubbornly and practically dragged Santana to her feet. She held on to her hand and forcefully led Santana through the restaurant.

"Come on! What the fuck is going on?" Carmen asked after pushing her sister into the ladies room.

"Language!" Santana exclaimed with wide eyes.

"Whatever, mom!" Carmen answered and rolled her eyes. Santana was getting angry. Carmen could immediately tell and her first sibling-instincts told her to be irritated back but then she realized that was totally not the point of this.

"Look, I don't want to fight with you. I just want to know what's up. I know you're upset." She tried to make Santana, well not happy, but at least less angry with a very loving tone and Santana's face did soften.

"You can cry if you want." Carmen suggested gently when Santana still didn't talk. Her sister was always so difficult with when it came to talking and opening up, but at least it earned a smile from Santana who put her arms around Carmen and hugged her. She buried her face in her little sister's hair. It felt good, like home, and it was some sort of outlet for everything Santana was keeping inside.

"I've tried." Santana whispered into her sister's embrace. Santana had ignored the world for three days straight. She had tried to figure out what was wrong with her. Why she was so angry and not sad?

"San, what went down?" Carmen asked gingerly and pulled away to look Santana in the eyes.

"She was with someone else." Santana said, speaking very quietly.

"Hold up! She cheated on you?" Carmen could already feel herself begin to boil. The spicy temper was another family trade mark.

"Technically she cheated with me." Santana argued.

"That's gross! She has a girlfriend?" Carmen made a disgusted face and felt herself getting even more furious.

"Well, not anymo…" Santana tried to interject.

"Oh, imma cut her! That dirty little slut…" Carmen was completely losing herself in her mind and in everything she wanted to do to Brittany. No one – no fucking one – does a thing like that to her sister and gets away with it! If she ever saw Brittany again she would beat her up so bad she wouldn't be able to walk. And after someone had carried Brittany home she would sneak into her apartment and shave off that blonde hair while she was sleeping. Then trash her apartment and key her car and cut Brittany's fingers off, set them on fire and stuff them in her mouth…

"You know, she had that innocent look about her. Those are the worst. So fucking evil-"

"Calm down." Santana said in reaction to Carmen's harsh words, even though she wasn't sure why she had this sudden impulse to defend Brittany.

"Why? I'm so angry right now." Carmen said honestly, her chest slightly heaving with rage.

"I can see that, and I appreciate it, but please. I'm just trying to not think about it." Santana said helplessly.

"How's that working out for you?" Carmen said with the same irritation in her voice, even if she didn't mean to snap at Santana.

"No great." Santana admitted quietly and looked down at her feet. Carmen instantly calmed down. She was trying to comfort Santana – not hurt her more.

"Oh, Sanny! I'm sorry. It's just, you deserve so much better! I really thought you'd found it."

"Yeah, so did I, C… So did I." Santana sighed and looked at her sister with big eyes.

"Do you need me to stay here with you?" Carmen suggested and though Santana thought it sounded tempting she knew it wasn't possible.

"Doesn't school start up soon?" Santana asked despite knowing the answer. Carmen just shrugged like it didn't matter.

"I thought you were captain of the Cheerio's now?" Santana said in an attempt to get Carmen excited about leaving in a few hours.

"Yup." Carmen nodded with a proud smile. "… Sue won't shut up about you, you know." She winked at Santana.

"You needs to get your butt back to Ohio and practice or you'll never be better than me." Santana joked and nudged Carmen's arm.

"Oh bitch, please! I'm already better than you." Carmen snorted and rolled her eyes.

"In your dreams." Santana pushed Carmen playfully by the shoulders but then pulled her in for another hug. It lasted for as long as Santana needed it to, but pretty soon their parents would start to think they were taking major shadoobies in here. Carmen opened the door to go back but Santana stood still and fidgeted.

"You coming?"

"Yeah… Can we just… can we just not mention it out there? Mom and dad looked so happy when they met Brittany, I just… don't want to break their hearts too." Santana almost whispered the last part and gave Carmen a pleading look. Carmen figured the least she could do was offer her sister some relief.

"Sure thing, babe."

* * *

><p>Santana shoved the key in the hole and used her whole body to push the door open. She was exhausted. After she shut it, she pressed her back flat against it and took a deep breath as she closed her eyes.<p>

Pretending like nothing was wrong had sucked all the energy out of her. She didn't have much energy to begin with since she had barely slept for three days but she still couldn't believe how tired she was from just spending the afternoon with her parents and Carmen - the people she loved more than anything in the world. It was the first time since she moved to New York that she actually felt relieved when they left.

Emma was gone too and Santana was finally just alone. Maybe she could slip into some sweats and eat a bucket of ice cream? That's what she's supposed to want to do, right? She was just… still to angry to be depressed. Santana opened her eyes, put her keys in the bowl and kicked off her shoes. She walked into the kitchen.

The table was completely covered in bouquets of different flowers, from Brittany of course. In the trash were several wrapped gifts that Santana had just thrown away without opening and along with them several cards she hadn't bother to read. Santana opened the fridge and was met with three boxes of chocolates and four bottles of wine, also compliments of Brittany. Santana had kept anything edible; she thought maybe she'd want it later. She contemplated whether or not she should crack open a bottle of wine, but decided she wasn't that pathetic yet.

She walked down the hallway to her room. Stepping inside she was met with the sight of hundreds of white tulips and yellow and red roses. And a worn down woman sleeping in Santana's armchair in the corner.

"Did you break into my apartment?" Santana asked loudly and woke Brittany with a startle. Brittany opened her mouth but it took her a second to fully return to consciousness.

"Technically – yes…" Brittany began, standing up from the chair.

"You're a cop! What are you stupid?" Santana barked. Brittany looked surprised with Santana's question for a few seconds and then her face just looked hurt. She shook her head.

"No…" She whispered almost inaudibly.

"Britt! What the fuck is this?" Santana asked, changing the subject and looking around the room. The freaking flowers were everywhere.

"I want to talk to you." Brittany said quietly, still not completely recovered from Santana's earlier remark.

"Then what the fuck is all this?" Santana asked again and not exactly trying to hide her dismay.

"I t-thought…uh…" Brittany stuttered.

"What?" Santana had zero patience.

"There's so much to explain. Please, give me a chance to fix it." Brittany spoke, this time louder.

"Like this?"

"But…"

"No, B! That's enough! Enough with the gifts and the flowers and the chocolate and the whine and the balloons and the freakin' sky-writing. You can't buy your way out of this one! You can't buy me!" Santana got louder and louder with every word and by the end of her rant it had turned into full-blown screaming. She started walking towards the exit again.

"What are you doing?" Brittany asked nervously while also following closely.

"I'm storming out!" Santana said over her shoulder and grabbed her keys.

"This is your apartment." Brittany stated and furrowed her eyebrows.

"I don't care." Santana mumbled and slammed the door in Brittany's face. Then she opened it again.

"Don't be here when I get back." She said, looking Brittany straight in the eyes. She tried to slam the door shut again but Brittany grabbed it and threw it open with force.

"SANTANA!" Brittany roared. Her frustration had been building for days and she just couldn't help the voice that came out. Santana stopped and she even did a full 180.

"Are you asking me to give up?" Brittany asked, this time her voice was gentler. Santana's heart twisted in pain. She clenched her fists.

"Yes." Santana said, more quietly than she intended but that didn't matter because Brittany flinched like she just heard a gunshot. She broke down in tears and Santana forced her steps down the stairs and away from the agonizing sound of Brittany hurt. Brittany watched as Santana's dark head bobbed with each step and she nodded in defeat. Enough then.

Santana didn't know where to go. She wasn't in the mood to do anything. She wasn't in the mood to be around people. She just wanted to go home and go to bed and forget this day ever happened. Santana was so run down. She was so angry, and being angry was exhausting. All the while being angry prevented her from sleeping and eliminated her appetite. She didn't even eat breakfast.

Without really knowing it Santana had walked to the café where she works. She peeked inside and was relived to see that Mercedes wasn't working. She wasn't in the mood for more fighting. She went inside and ordered a hot chocolate to go. Warm milk helps you sleep, right?

"Bloody bejesus! You look absolutely knackered!" Rory said from behind the counter.

"I'm whacked." Santana confirmed and grabbed her chocolate.

"That cup won't do you much good, yi' know." Rory said gently and tilted his head. It's sweet that he cares but Santana really wasn't in the mood. She just mumbled a response and went out to the street again. She reached for her phone and checked the time. It had been just under fifteen minutes.

That wasn't a lot of time but Santana just wanted to go home. How long can it take to get the fuck out anyways? She traced her steps back to her apartment again and prayed to God that Brittany wouldn't be there. She needed to left alone.

When she got inside her paper cup was almost empty so she went to the kitchen to throw it away. She didn't realize it at first but someone had emptied the trash can. She looked over to the table and found that cleared too. She opened the fridge and saw only groceries. She hurried to her room and it was like Brittany's visit had just been a dream.

There wasn't a single rose petal left. Had it been just a dream? Santana knew she desperately needed to get her sleep on but she wasn't seriously hallucinating, was she? Santana tugged her shirt off and pulled her pants down. She lifted the covers to get into bed but flinched at the sight of one single red rose. Santana remembered how to breathe again. Brittany had been there. She lifted the rose and smelled it. This part she probably did just imagine – but she thought it smelled like Brittany. She read the card.

_I can stop calling you_

_I can't stop loving you_

Santana didn't throw the rose away, she didn't even put it on the nightstand. She put it back where she had found it and crawled between the sheets. She slept with Brittany's words right there next to her and for the first time in three nights she actually slept until morning.


	13. Chapter 13

This one might feel a little weird because 1) there's a time jump and 2) it's all about Brittany. It's short but explainy.

Anyways, I suck at police lingo, especially in English… so bear with. First two sections are flashbacks hence the curved font, and then we jump back to "present time". Note that it's late March 2013 already. (Brittany and Santana last saw each other August of 2012)

**CHAPTER 13**

**"Busted"**

* * *

><p><strong>June 9th, 2012<strong>

* * *

><p><em>"Shit!" Brittany exclaimed in a half whisper and dove her small body in behind Dave's burly one. Karofsky looked around, he wasn't gonna let anyone or anything hurt his partner and friend. When he didn't see anything he got confused.<em>

_"What?" He asked. Brittany stared down the dark street to where a colourful woman was shaking hands with a man in a suit under a lamp post. The shadiness of it was almost cliché._

_"That's Sugar! She can't know that I'm a cop! That fake alias identity won't do me much good if she sees me in a uniform." Brittany explained._

_"Why are you even patrolling the streets if you're undercover?" Dave asked with a frown._

_"It's my favourite part." Brittany shrugged coyly until panic took over._

_"Fuck! She's coming this way!" Brittany squealed with desperation in her voice and clung closer to Dave's back._

_"Quick, go in there!" Dave said as it was the first solution to the situation that came to mind._

_"What it is?" Brittany asked with confusion._

_"Just some random bar. Go inside!" Dave insisted and basically pushed Brittany inside before walking down the street again, trying to act casual. Brittany looked around inside the bar. It had some interesting people but her eyes immediately caught two ladies in a brawl. She figured she might as well do some good since she stumbled upon it._

_"Stop the violence." She said and tried to speak with authority but the gorgeous one was seriously distracting._

* * *

><p><strong>July 23rd, 2012<strong>

* * *

><p><em>"You did what?"<em>

_"I broke up with Sugar Motta."_

_"Officer Pierce. Please tell me you are joking."_

_"No I'm sorry… I just couldn't do it anymore."_

_"You broke up with Sugar Motta? Without speaking with me first?"_

_"I knew that if I spoke to you… you wouldn't let me so…"_

_"You broke up with Sugar Motta?"_

_"Director Beiste, please-"_

_"Do you have any idea what you've done?"_

_"No. Yes. I just had to get out."_

_"Had to get out? Brittany, are you listening to yourself right now?"_

_"But you don't understand…-"_

_"No! I don't understand. I don't understand at all. You have been doing a lousy job lately. You show up late, you give bad excuses and now this? What's gotten into you Brittany?"_

_"Love..."_

* * *

><p><strong>Present time, March 23rd, 2013<strong>

* * *

><p>"Welcome back Brittany." The masculine looking woman behind her desk greeted as Brittany stepped into her director's office.<p>

"Thank you, ma'am." Brittany said softly with her hands behind her back, looking somewhat uncomfortable.

"You got yourself a nice tan there. I take it the time off was alright?" Shannon used the term 'time off' instead of calling it what it really was – a long ass suspension. Shannon was still anything but pleased with Brittany but despite their best efforts to find some sort of a replacement they still needed her for endgame.

The truth was Brittany didn't want to be any part of it anymore but she felt guilty and obligated. And having been forced to stay away from Santana for months had taken a serious tole on her. She found herself constantly ending up outside Santana's window so, being suspended anyways, Brittany hopped on a plane and left the country for a couple of months. Now that she was back, suspension over, she couldn't leave Shannon hanging.

"It was good, thank you." Brittany answered with a nod.

"So you're ready then?" The woman said raising her eyebrows and sporting a very serious looking expression. She meant business. Shannon always meant business.

"With all due respect, Director Beiste… I think we have enough evidence, can't we just send some agents to arrest her?" Brittany asked with a hint of desperation in her voice. She knew she was the one who jeopardized this mission, but she really didn't want to go through with her final task. It was worth one last try to get out of it.

"Brittany, you wanted this job, remember? You were the one who came to me and asked for it. You were just a random cop and you knew it would be a risk for me. Do you remember what you said to me?" Shannon spoke gently but firmly. Brittany remembered how grateful she had felt towards Shannon when, over a year ago, she had finally gotten this case. This case with so much promise. Brittany couldn't let her down.

"I said… that you could trust me." Brittany said quietly and looked in a different direction.

"Can I?" Beiste wanted to confirm. Brittany took a deep breath.

"Yes."

"I don't have to remind you that Sugar Motta is head of the biggest drug cartel New York City has ever seen. You fucked up once before with your shenanigans. You will not mess up this bust, have I made myself clear?" Shannon didn't really need to explain the seriousness of this situation as Brittany was well aware of it, but the woman's tone made it clear that Brittany basically had no choice.

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good. We need that confession."

* * *

><p>"Sugar, let me in!" Brittany pleaded and had tears building up in her eyes, although not from wanting to go inside. She knocked on the door again.<p>

"Please." She tried to beg.

"Why should I?" Sugar called from the other side of the door and sounded upset to say the least. She hadn't seen Jessica, or who she liked to called J-bird, in months and now she thought she could just barge back in her life?

"Sugar please. I l…-" Brittany swallowed hard. "I love you." She said and was glad Sugar couldn't see her eyes as she said it. There was almost a full minute of complete silence but then the lock on the door turned and the door chain rattled as it came undone. Brittany felt the handle and could open the door.

"How did you find me here?" Sugar asked with less anger than before.

"I know you." Brittany said softly and walked closer to Sugar. She put her hand on Sugar's shoulder but the woman, dressed in bright green, just looked at it.

"Where's your little girlfriend?" Sugar asked spitefully and remembered the beautiful woman and how hurt she had felt when she was finally confronted with the woman Brittany had left for.

"I don't wanna be with her. Or any other girl." Brittany said and felt nauseous with the scripted words. She squeezed Sugar's shoulder tighter and though it was really just a way to release some of the hurt Brittany felt inside Sugar took it as a sign of affection.

"I just want you." Brittany added and her tears fell over the edge and down her cheeks. Brittany shut her eyes. She hadn't seen Santana in so long but every time she closed her eyes, Santana's eyes and smile, and dark hair, and tan skin would shimmer at her. She missed her so much. She had tried to get away from it, heck she had even flown to the other side of the world, but being here and pretending otherwise just made her see it even more clearly.

"Sugar, do you love me too?" Brittany asked and Sugar's softening face let her know that she was getting through to the woman in front of her. Sugar nodded slightly.

"Yes!" She answered and dove into a kiss on Brittany's lips. Brittany clenched her eyes shut as hard as she could. Seeing Santana's face didn't help. She moved her lips against Sugar's but they didn't mold together with hers the way Santana's did. Sugar didn't have that delicious taste of Santana that Brittany loved to have lingering on her lips. They weren't as warm, they just... they weren't Santana's lips. Brittany wanted, needed, the kiss to end. In her desperation she pulled away, though as gingerly as she could.

"What's wrong?" Sugar asked and felt fear and anger build up inside her again.

"There's just… I wanna be with you, but I'm afraid…" Brittany spoke slowly.

"Of what?" Sugar asked confused.

"This 'job' of yours… you know theee…" Brittany dragged out the sentence.

"The business." Sugar filled in casually and nodded for Brittany to continue.

"Right the business… It seems dangerous… can't you…-" Brittany spoke slowly and hoped Sugar would cut in. She did.

"I make millions every day selling this shit, I can't just stop." Sugar explained and stroked Brittany's cheek to comfort her.

"But I don't want you to get hurt." Brittany insisted.

"I won't. I trust my people. I give them the drugs, they give me the money. It's not like I interact with the dirty cokeheads." Sugar was irritated but her high-pitch, whiny voice just made her sound silly. She gave Brittany's cheek another comforting stroke but withdrew her hand when she saw the expression in Brittany's face change completely. Sugar questioned Brittany's apologetic eyes with a frown.

"I'm so sorry." Brittany whispered before undoing the top buttons of her shirt and revealing that she was wearing a wire.

"Sugar Motta, you're under arrest for smuggling, possessing and selling drugs on a major scale. You have the right to remain silent…" Brittany said monotonously, like her voice was recorded, and stared with blank eyes as two officers entered the apartment and cuffed Sugar, who was looking at Brittany in confusion and hurt. Brittany could barely stand to look at her knowing she did that. Again.

"…Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law."

* * *

><p>"Brittany, you did good." Shannon said and put an encouraging hand on Brittany's arm who had barely spoken a word for the whole duration of the celebration party.<p>

"You should be proud." Beiste added with a proud smile. Since the first day Brittany had walked into her office, so full of ambition, Brittany had been so motivated to get to the bottom of this case. It was a quality to be desired and Beiste felt personally proud over Brittany for succeeding. Brittany snorted and pulled out an envelope from the inside of her coat.

"What's this?" Shannon asked and eyed the white in Brittany's hand.

"It's my letter of resignation." Brittany spoke firmly and extended her arm slightly for Beiste to take the envelope.

"Brittany Susan Pierce, I am warning you." Shannon said, sounding anything but amused.

"I wanted this case because I wanted answers but I didn't find any. I became a cop to help people but in the end…-" Brittany said staring into nothing.

"And you do help!" Beiste interrupted and tried to ensure, but Brittany just shook her head.

"I broke her heart. I broke Sugar's heart and I broke-" Brittany choked. She hadn't said Santana's name out loud in such a long time. Despite her best effort she wasn't a single step closer to getting over Santana. She started crying when she thought about the pain she had caused Santana. That look on her face, so tortured. And what for?

"Brittany, you help a lot of people…-"

"People? How can I care about people when I ended up hurting the only person left in my life who really matters?" Brittany didn't care that she probably wasn't making any sense to her boss who hadn't the faintest idea what had happened in her personal life. Nor did she care that she was making a scene.

"But helping…-" Shannon thought Brittany was making a big mistake here.

"I can help in other ways. Like I did the last couple of months. It felt good." Brittany interrupted and let out a sigh. She looked around the room and calmed herself down. "Don't worry, I'll do the paperwork and I'll talk to the press and everything… but please just leave me alone." Brittany begged to Shannon who could no longer ignore the hurt look in Brittany's eyes. Director Beiste sighed and nodded her head.

"Alright, B. It's alright."


	14. Chapter 14

.

**CHAPTER 14**

"**Reach out"**

Santana felt like she was in a Notting Hill movie montage, where she's walking down the street and the seasons change. Fall had come and gone, winter had passed by and spring was closing in with fast steps. Time just went by. Everyday was the same as the one before. Waking up, going to work and coming home to Emma who still hadn't moved out of the apartment even though her husband was eagerly awaiting.

Emma was trying to be a good friend to Santana who still refused to admit something was wrong. Emma knew what had happened of course but Santana still hadn't broken down. Emma hadn't seen or heard her friend cry even once. But Santana was miserable.

She had practically begged Brittany to go to hell. She thought that when Brittany stopped trying she would be able to get on with her life. But that first day when she came home to a red rose still in her bed, her answering machine had no messages. Her cell phone had no texts or missed calls. There was no letter in the mail. It was like her heart broke all over again.

Every day she hoped to hear from Brittany but never did. Every time she saw a woman in a uniform she hoped it was Brittany but it never was. Every time Santana drove or walked by the dock she hoped to see Brittany on her yacht but she was never there. Santana could walk behind people in street, following them for blocks, but when they turned around it was never who she thought it was.

It's like the she just disappeared off the face of the earth. Santana never expected to miss her _so fucking much_. Sometimes when she was alone in her room she could randomly start giggling at something silly Brittany had done or said. Some mornings she woke up and thought she felt Brittany spooning her like she always did when they slept together before, but when Santana reached her hand out to confirm it; she felt nothing but air.

Then she remembered. She remembered everything and wrath started gnawing in her brain again. Sometimes she would punch the wall in fury when she thought about Sugar. But she didn't cry. She never cried.

Santana walked the flights of stairs and was met by the smell of freshly baked bread when she entered her apartment.

"Aren't you the little housewife?" Santana chirped to Emma and put her hand on the redhead's shoulder.

"I have to do something. Noah and I are fighting again." Emma sighed and squatted down to look at her creations through the little window on the oven.

"Emma! Just move to Puck's already! I'm fine!" Santana ensured, feeling guilty about causing problems between the couple and a little annoyed since it really wasn't her fault.

"No." Emma answered shortly.

"Whuh…-?" Santana began.

"One of these days, you're gonna be ready to talk about this and I'm gonna be here when you are." Emma said matter of factly and took the bread out of the oven. Santana's irritation dripped away. Emma really cared about her and just wanted to be there for her. Santana being so closed off and reserved was torture for the ginger woman who hated seeing her friend in silent agony. Maybe Santana could just humor her for a while? She didn't want to be the reason anyone else was as miserable as her.

"If I talk about it, will you please just move?" Santana asked, partly determined, partly jokingly, and partly lovingly.

"Yes." Emma chirped but didn't want to get her hopes up too high. She turned the oven off and the room got a little darker as the light inside went off. Santana turned the redhead around and discarded of her apron. She put it on the counter and took Emma's hand, forcefully leading her to the living room and sitting her down on the couch.

Santana sat down next to Emma and twisted her body to face her friend. Emma twisted around as well and they were now looking each other straight in the eyes. Santana wasn't really sure how to start this. Maybe she had gotten a little too ahead of herself here.

"So…" Santana started gently while still praying for words to come to her.

"How do you feel?" Emma asked gently in her therapist voice. Santana giggled at first. Emma did do this for a living but Santana didn't want to feel like Emma's patient. But she also couldn't put this off any longer. She might as well just get it over with.

"I feel like crap. I feel angry. I feel cheated." Santana took a deep breath between every sentence. She liked saying it out loud. It made it more real and she had spent so much energy the last couple month pretending it wasn't, especially to the surrounding world.

"At least she cheated _with_ you and not _on_ you." Emma tried gently, really believing that statement would cheer her friend up. It made sense to her - you cheat on someone because you can't stay away from someone else, right? Santana flinched at the words and formed a big frown.

"Don't you see how that makes it so much worse?" Santana exclaimed to a startled Emma who just shook her head in a frightened manner, encouraging Santana to explain and also calm herself down. Santana didn't mean to snap at Emma so she took a deep breath before she continued.

"I was the mistress! Unknowingly I might add. She let me paint this whole beautiful picture of a life together with her and then she just crushed it because she already had a picture with someone else." Santana worked herself up, she had thought this for so long and it felt even truer when she put actual audible words to it.

Emma continued to shake her head, although now looking more sad than afraid. Emma thought Brittany was a really nice girl - and not just because she gave Emma and Puck a trip to the Bahamas. Emma also knew something Santana didn't yet.

"No, it wasn't like that. She never meant to hurt you. She had obligations, she might have been tied to a picture but she left it to be with you…" Emma's voice faded out as Santana's face grew more and more sceptical.

"How would you know?" Santana snorted and was offended that Emma seemed to think she knew Brittany better than Santana herself.

"You should read today's paper." Emma said softly and reached over the table and grabbed it. She handed it to Santana and after stroking Santana's cheek she got up from the couch and left the room.

Santana looked at the folded pages for a couple of seconds before straightening it out to read the letters. **Undercover drug bust - major success**was the front page headline. Santana flicked the pages to the article. Santana immediately recognized the woman in the picture. It was Brittany's ex-girlfriend. **No more white powder for Sugar**was written in bold letters under the photo. Santana skimmed through the text.

**Local police officer Brittany S. Pierce head of the operation… worked undercover for over a year… infiltrated Motta's life with unorthodox methods… seduced Sugar with fake identity…the operation in jeopardy… in the end could walk away having taken down the biggest drug mob… gave her resignation after the arrest…**

Santana forgot how to breathe. In her lack of oxygen a whole new light suddenly shone on the situation. She heard things she hadn't listened to before. "_It was part of it - I couldn't - I wasn't supposed to - much was at stake."_The words pierced through her. It was Brittany's job! Sugar was the undercover drug thing she was working on. In her wild rage Santana hadn't been allowed to realize that, but now it made_so_ much sense.

Santana's frozen heart warmed a little. She actually smiled until Emma's voice startled her.

"She's not a bad person." Emma said gently when her friend didn't say anything despite looking straight at her. She gave Santana a little tiny smile which Santana returned with a frown. The very idea of someone thinking that Brittany was a bad person upset Santana.

"No. She's everything that's good in this miserable, stinking world!" Santana blurted, a little surprised by her own words.

"Then maybe she just made a mistake…?" Emma continued in the same soft tone.

"She lied to me…" Santana started quietly and looked down in her lap for a second. Emma waited patiently but sat down next to Santana again to offer more support. Santana looked up again and found Emma's comforting eyes.

"I feel so tricked. So stupid and gullible and humiliated. I don't know how I'm supposed to look at her and not feel those things." Santana mumbled. Emma smiled softly.

"Maybe you should just hear her out? Give her a chance?" Emma spoke gently and took Santana's hand.

"Maybe you're right…" Santana said quietly as if relieved but a frown was still played between her brows. She opened her mouth to continue.

"… but she doesn't call anymore. She hasn't called in so long." Santana admitted, more to herself than to Emma.

"So then call _her_." Emma suggested and gave Santana's hand a squeeze.

"I can't do that!" Santana protested and felt like it was the one thing in this world that truly could not be done.

"Why not?" Emma asked a little confused.

"I'm scared." Santana admitted.

"She's probably at home waiting for your call as we speak. Come on sweetie, what could possibly be worse than this?" Emma asked and stood up, ready to go back into the kitchen. Santana pulled on the redhead's hand with a hint of panic to stop Emma from leaving.

"What if she's not waiting?"

* * *

><p>"Welcome back, loser!" Quinn chirped when Brittany opened the door.<p>

"I'm not a loser." Brittany argued.

"You mope around your apartment, unemployed and depressed. That's a loser." Quinn said and smirked. "But it's okay. I brought tequila so we can be depressed together." Quinn continued and hugged her friend, pressing the bottle against Brittany's back.

"Why are you depressed?" Brittany asked and Quinn pulled away from the hug.

"Uhm – no reason. I mean for you… depressed for you." Quinn said in a little blurt. "So you still haven't heard from her, huh?" She asked quickly to change the subject.

"No, not a word…" Brittany said quietly and shook her head. "Rachel gave me the dresses if you wanna try them on?"

"Yeah, I guess we could do that first…" Quinn said with a little change in her face. "Are you sure? Since you've been away... maybe you just missed it?"

"No, trust me. She hasn't tried to contact me." Brittany ensured and threw a dress over at Quinn.

"She wants us to wear these?" Quinn eyed the dress with skepticism before removing her clothes to put it on. "So why don't you call her?"

"No, she doesn't want me to so…" Brittany answered and recalled that last time she had seen Santana in her apartment.

"But maybe she just needed to cool down?" Quinn insisted and pulled the dress over her head. "This is really ugly!" Quinn continued and looked down on her dress.

"Maybe… But she asked me not to try anymore and I just… have to give her what she wants." Brittany said and sighed.

"This sucks! Why can't life ever be fair?"Quinn questioned and Brittany's eyebrows rose.

She looked at the woman in front of her who seemed to be getting angrier and angrier for no obvious reason.

"This might be the ugliest, most unflattering dress…-"

"Come on, Quinn. We don't look… terrible" Brittany tried. "And with three of us up there it's gonna look even better."

"Where is Tina anyways?" Quinn asked, still irritated.

"She had a thing or something… she was vague." Brittany said and shrugged. It didn't really matter to her that Tina had blown them off. Brittany was just happy to see Quinn again.

"Bitch." Quinn muttered between her teeth.

"Hey!" Brittany protested. She liked Tina and didn't think anyone deserved such harsh words.

"I'm sorry." Quinn said sarcastically and rolled her eyes.

"Are you _ever_ going to tell her?" Brittany asked, tired of ignoring the enormous bright elephant in the room. Quinn looked puzzled.

"Tell her what? Who?" She asked and shook her head in confusion.

"Rachel! That you're in love with her." Brittany talked about it like it wasn't a big deal but Quinn's eyes went wide. She hadn't expected to be confronted on that anytime soon.

"I'm not _in love_ with Rachel! She's getting married." Quinn said but was trying to sound so convincing it had a very opposite affect.

"She likes you too. She deserves to know." Brittany said gently.

"She likes me too?" Quinn asked and raised an eyebrow.

"She hasn't told me so, bu…-" Brittany started explaining but as soon as Quinn heard that, any glimmer of hope died and she was back in defensive mode.

"She's marrying Will. She's having the beautiful spring wedding she's always dreamed of." Quinn said with defeat in her voice.

"So?" Brittany didn't really want to ruin someone else's relationship, she sure did a bang up job ruining her own, but she cared too much about Quinn to see her hurt like this.

"I'm the maid of _honor!_ I'm supposed to be _honorable_!" Quinn argued.

"Look Quinn… are you seriously gonna stand up there and watch her promise eternal love to someone else when you're dying to be with her? The only way to be _honorable_ is to be _honest_." Brittany spoke gently but convincingly and Quinn was beginning to crack.

"I learned that the hard way, remember?" Brittany joked even though it hurt her a little inside. She hoped her failed example would encourage Quinn to go for it. There was a knock on the door. Brittany ignored it and continued looking into Quinn's eyes. The knock repeated itself.

"Don't you have people for that?" Quinn asked since the noise gave her trouble concentrating.

"I sent them home. Finn was getting handsy with his comforting hugs." Brittany shrugged.

"Well, aren't you going to get it?" Quinn asked. Brittany just shrugged again.

"Fine. I'll get it." Quinn said, now slightly irritated and turned to walk towards the door. Brittany heard the door open.

"Who is it?" Brittany called to the vestibule since the silence had her a little curious.

"Uhm… I'm gonna go fight for my woman!" Quinn called back. "Shouldn't you be off somewhere doing the same?" Quinn added. Brittany snorted.

"I already told you; she doesn't want to ta-" Brittany called but was interrupted by the sound of Quinn closing the door behind her.

"…lk to me." Brittany finished much lower and looked around the empty apartment. What to do now? Maybe just down that bottle alone in front of a life time movie.

Brittany walked into her bedroom and took her dress off. It was_really_ ugly but she didn't mind looking hideous for Rachel. Of course she still hoped that there'd be no wedding…

Brittany slipped on some sweatpants and pulled a big T-shirt over her head. She put her hair up in a loose bun. She snorted at herself in the mirror. She sure as hell looked like a _loser_. She walked back out to the living room and froze at the sight of a familiar face standing in the middle of the room.

"Santana?"

"Brittany…"

* * *

><p>Are you serious, Mollie? Another cliffhanger? I know, I have a problem. I'll go see a doctor and then we'll see on Sunday if I've gotten any better. Seeing as how I gave you three chapters and all.. send me a review, just a tinie tiny one :) Like I bought dinner and now you put out :P<p> 


	15. Chapter 15

_Item 1 on the agenda;_ Thanking my awesome readers for reviewing!

_Item 2;_ Introduce chapter - This chapter was originally two but I just thought they went better together (plus the whole cliff-hanger thing) so I crammed them into one. It's probably the longest one of this story... But if you managed three chapters last time you can manage this :)

_Item 3_; Make lame excuse - I couldn't think of a good name for this chapter so I just pulled one out of my a**

_Item 4;_ Thanking you again for being awesome and crank on with the chapter.

**CHAPTER 15**

"**Brick by brick"**

Brittany stood still in the same spot and just stared. She couldn't believe it was actually Santana standing in front of her.

"Hi." Santana said when Brittany just continued to stare. She hadn't really thought this one through, she hadn't prepared a speech or even gone over in her mind what she wanted to say.

"Hi." Brittany greeted back softly, still not sure of how to act.

"Hi." Santana said again, getting noticeably warmer and feeling the urge to take her coat off, but too paralyzed to do anything about it.

"Hello." Brittany answered with a crooked smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. She had been afraid Santana came here to yell, but seeing her insecurely squirm in her spot on the floor made Brittany somewhat relax.

"Hi." Santana repeated for a third time, now almost panicking from her lack of words.

"You said that." Brittany pointed out gingerly and gave Santana a loving smile so she wouldn't take it the wrong way.

"How are you?" Santana asked. It felt ridiculous but it was all she could think of. Brittany's eyes flickered to the floor but then back up at Santana.

"I've been better." Brittany answered honestly. "You?"

"Yeah, me too." Santana confessed quietly.

"You look really tan." Santana noticed and gave Brittany's face and exposed arms another look.

"Yeah. I was in Ghana for a couple of months… I fund a project that builds orphanages and schools, so I went over there to help out first hand as well." Brittany explained quietly, leaving out the part where she had to travel across the freaking Atlantic to be able to stay away from Santana.

"Oh." Santana responded, not really sure how to comment on the woman's impressive actions. It was really hard to be angry with Brittany right now, because she was just too good. _At least this explains why she just vanished_. Santana thought, and felt a lot better inside, until she saw Brittany's face. She looked at Santana with furrowed eyebrows.

"Santana, why are you here?" Brittany asked, still as gingerly as possible. She couldn't figure out what Santana might want and even though she was _so_ happy to see her it was kind of difficult too, at least if she was only here to say it was over - _for real_. This was the part Santana had dreaded. She had no idea how to convey what she wanted to get out there.

"I read the article…" Santana said quietly, staring at Brittany who let out a quiet 'oh'.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Santana whispered, her courage was failing her and along with it her voice.

"I tried…" Brittany said in an apologetic manner. Santana nodded and bit her lip.

"I know… I, uhm… I never – you never got – I didn't give you – but if you still want it – I mean, uhm – if you want – if you can give me a chance I want to give you one also…" Santana stuttered. _Smooth!_ She cleared her throat.

"_I mean_, if you still want to talk, I want to listen now." Santana said and tried to keep her shaky voice from collapsing into a complete mute. _There_, that came out better.

"O-kay…" Brittany said hesitantly, still trying to grasp what Santana had just suggested.

"You don't have to!" Santana blurted. There was no point in forcing Brittany to explain herself if she was already over Santana, and had moved on and everything.

"Nuh…-" Brittany was about to explain that she would like that very much but she was cut off by more stuttering.

"I just… I couldn't – I thought about you – and the months – it didn't stop - and then the article, and I thought maybe – uhm maybe – you also… but, uhm – that's silly, I'm sorry!" Santana suddenly felt like she needed to get out of there. Of course Brittany had moved on. She turned around but had to think for a second, the apartment was so huge she didn't know which way to go.

"No, don't go!" Brittany exclaimed in sheer panic of Santana leaving. Santana hadn't actually had time to take a single step towards the exit but she turned back around again and let Brittany know she wasn't going anywhere. Brittany wanted air and couldn't stand her mocking apartment staring back at her.

"I want to! I very much want to... just not here. Let me get dressed." Brittany started walking towards her bedroom but then she turned back around again.

"Don't go!" Brittany said again just to make sure, and gestured with her hands for Santana to take a seat before disappearing back into her bedroom.

She tugged at her bun and let her hair hang loose. Then she saw the marks from the scrunchie and pulled her hair back in a high ponytail instead. She slipped out of her comfy sweat clothes and put on a pair of jeans and a hoodie. Trying to impress by not looking impressive. With a quick phone call she set things up and then she walked back to the living room where Santana was waiting on the couch.

* * *

><p>The drive was silent. Santana was too afraid to ask where they were going, even if she probably would have gotten an answer if she did. Santana used the time to think about what to say instead. She couldn't find anything that was quite right. That she missed Brittany? That not seeing her, not waking up next to her, not feeling Brittany's hand in hers was excruciating? They hadn't talked for months so that would be weird, wouldn't it?<p>

When Santana saw where Brittany parked she was shaken from her thoughts and really just got irritated instead.

"Britt, I really don't feel like going on your yacht." Santana said after closing the car door and taking a couple of steps to meet halfway, in front of the car.

"We're not going on the yacht." Brittany ensured and reached her hand out to guide Santana to their destination. Santana gave the hand a look but then Brittany pulled it back. She realized that maybe it was a little too much too soon, so instead she just pointed in the right direction with her whole arm and started walking in it.

They walked slowly next to each other. Santana, because she didn't know where they were going and didn't want to get ahead of herself and be confronted with one of those 'not-that-way-situations'. Brittany, because she was getting nervous but she was also enjoying the sunlight, which was warming the cool spring day.

They walked further and further out on the pier. Santana couldn't believe how long it was and she couldn't possibly think of a reason why they were walking on it. When they got closer she saw something by the very end of it. She slowed her steps even more and that's when Brittany realized that Santana had spotted their destination.

"I thought a café or a restaurant might be too crowded and I didn't want to do anything… flashy, so…" Brittany started hesitantly and waited until they had reached the little square of blankets with two pillows for the girls to sit on.

"… just you, me and a picnic." Brittany finished and gave Santana a hesitant smile. Santana smiled back.

"That's nice." Santana confirmed. Brittany motioned for Santana to sit down and squatted down herself, shifting her weight from her feet to her butt, pressing it against the pillow.

She reached for the wicker basket and opened it when Santana was also sitting comfortably in front of her. She pulled out two paper plates and put a croissant on each of them and then she let Santana decide between a chocolate milk drink and sparkling water. Santana decided on the water which left Brittany with the milk. It was her first choice anyway and she smiled at how they complemented each other.

Santana took a bite of her croissant. It tasted good. She took another bite. It reminded her of how they always had croissants for breakfast at Brittany's place. Every single morning. Santana chewed but now the memory gave her trouble swallowing. She tried another bite but it just wouldn't go down easily so she put the pastry down. Brittany mimicked and took a deep breath. _Here we go._

Brittany explained everything. She explained how she had seduced Sugar as part of uncovering the 'business' Sugar had built. She explained how she had been pretending to be in love with Sugar and posing as her girlfriend and how she wasn't allowed to talk about it. "_Under no circumstances are you to utter a single word about this to anyone."_ – Those were Director Beiste's exact words.

How everything had been going according to plan until she met Santana. How she tried to stay away but she just couldn't help herself. She explained how she fell in love but was forced to keep the op going. How she couldn't live with hurting Santana so she broke up with Sugar, rattling the mission and pissing off some very important people. She explained how she went to Ghana because she was suspended anyways and staying away from Santana was _so_ difficult. She explained how she got back just last week and finished what she had started. How she promised herself to never do anything like that again and how she quit her job just yesterday.

Finally she explained how sorry she was. Santana looked at her with big eyes. She nodded understandingly at everything she had just been presented with. Broken heart aside, it was a really intriguing story. One thing that hit Santana, though, was how much trouble she had caused Brittany. She couldn't help but feel like she got in the way. Like she was an inconvenience that Brittany would have been better off without. Brittany read the bothered look on Santana's face and she wanted to ask her about it but she had more to say first.

"I want to tell you about my mother." Brittany said and looked for something in Santana's face to let her know she wanted to hear it. Santana nodded. She had been trying to get this story out of Brittany since their very first date but Brittany had kept changing the subject or excusing herself with not being in the mood, or excusing herself with being _too much_ in the mood and seducing Santana.

"She was a Dutch ballerina… she was beautiful. She came to New York to perform on Broadway. I still have a taping of one of her shows; I could watch it for hours when I was little…" Brittany really didn't like talking about this but she wasn't going to let herself get sidetracked.

"Anyways… She met my dad and they sort of dated, I guess, for a while. Then she got pregnant with me… by mistake. They got married and moved out of the city. I was born and… well, things went downhill from there. I'm not sure exactly what happened because I was so little but my dad told me about it when I got older." Brittany explained and took a deep breath.

"She wasn't… she wasn't very happy with us. Guess she was too much of a free spirit to be stuck in a Stepford town with a husband and a baby… She got involved with some things… Coke, heroin, meth, LSD, E, the whole freakin' alphabet… whatever she didn't take herself she sold and things got messy. She disappeared. My dad didn't know what happened to her. The police don't know. I've had _the best_people out there looking for her and I still don't know. She vanished." Brittany forced the words out. She hadn't really talked to anyone other than her dad about this ever.

"I heard about the op and I saw this opportunity to find answers. I thought if I penetrated that world that I might find something to give me a clue. I wasn't really getting anywhere and then… I met you." Brittany eyes changed. From a blank stare her eyes watered and she focused on something. She focused on Santana's brown orbs, diving into them.

"It was like fate or something. If Sugar hadn't been on that street at that exact time I would have never gone into that bar and-"

"Wait? We met because of Sugar?" Santana interrupted and raised an eyebrow at how ironic that seemed.

"No, silly… If anything, we met _thanks to_ Sugar." Brittany said with a crooked smile. Santana couldn't hold back a giggle.

"You're a dork." The words just bubbled out of Santana before she could stop it. And the goofy smile on her lips, she couldn't hold that back either. Eyes sparkled and smiles shimmered, the seconds were long but it couldn't last forever. Brittany basked in the moment before getting serious again.

"Have you ever loved someone so much that everything else just ceases to matter? So much that you'd do anything for just one more second with that person? So much that you think your head might explode if you don't get to see that person one more time? When you asked me to be your girlfriend I broke up with Sugar right away… I know it was too late. I should have left sooner. It's just… sometimes you get confused when what you _think_ is right and what you _feel_ is right are two different things. And I got so caught up in that struggle…" Brittany took a pause to look at Santana's reaction. Her face was soft but she seemed to have slipped back into being a little more reserved again.

"I never meant to hurt you and I never ever doubted how I feel about you. I'm so sorry that I let…" Brittany took a breath.

"…_stupidity_… get in the way of showing you that. And get in the way of giving you everything you deserve, real things, things money can't buy." Brittany felt more and more hopeless by the second as it was getting harder to read any emotion in Santana's face. Brittany sighed. There was no point in turning back now. She needed to get it all out there.

"Santana, I'm so sorry. I want to spend days saying that over and over again until you forgive me. I want to spend every waken hour making this mess up to you, but most of all… I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Brittany's voice cracked and she forced back a sob. Santana looked so cold on the outside.

On the inside Santana felt her wall come down. It broke, fell, shattered. Brick by brick, it evaporated. It didn't show in her face but she had never felt more loved. No one had ever spoken such words to her before. However there was also that lingering feeling that she had just been a hindrance. She had to know something… Santana took Brittany's hands, pulled them closer and let their held hands rest in her lap. Brittany gave Santana a questioning look.

"I want to tell you about Holly." Santana said gently and looked into Brittany's blue eyes. Brittany's frown grew bigger; she thought she knew about Holly? Santana tilted her head as if to ask if Brittany wanted her to continue and Brittany nodded.

"She, uh, she was never actually my _girlfriend_…" Santana started softly but already had to take a break and gather more strength to be able to talk about it.

"Like I told you before, we were best friends and we both dated guys, but we would occasionally hook up after parties and stuff and that went on throughout most of high school. Until senior year when I realized that I wanted more…" _This is going pretty well,_ Santana thought and felt like Brittany's intense stare was more comforting rather than intimidating.

"I told her. And she said she liked me too. We decided to stop seeing guys but she couldn't fully commit, you know? She kept saying that she needed more time to figure out what she really wanted… We sort of dated, although she refused to label it as that, for almost six months and it was like… the best six months of my life." Santana needed another break to breathe. The last part was the hardest.

"Then I found out… that the whole time she was also dating, you know the guy I told you about, the rugby captain and she said that I couldn't be mad at her because _he_ was her _real_ relationship and I was just… a side dish. Then she told me…" Santana swallowed.

"… She said that she was sorry that she ever slept with me, because she never meant for me to think that she was in love with me… and if she could go back, she would undo everything… Everything that had made me _so_ happy was just a big mistake to her." Santana sighed and squeezed Brittany's hands tighter to make sure she had Brittany's attention.

"I'm sorry I refused to listen to you before… It's just, I only heard the part where you were with someone else and I thought history was repeating itself." Santana looked in a different direction but before Brittany could say anything she opened her mouth again.

"Brittany, do you wish-?" Santana didn't get a chance to finish her question before she felt Brittany's hands pulling away from hers and suddenly they had a firm grip on Santana's face. Brittany made sure Santana was looking deep into her watery pools of blue before she spoke.

"If_I_ could go back… I would have called Sugar the second I laid eyes on you in that bar. I would have quit my stupid job and I would have broken up with her. That's my only regret! You have to know that I cherish every second I spent with you and I have never, and will never wish them unspent!" Brittany's voice was assuring and Santana finally let go.

Everything she had been unable to feel for months came rushing through her. Her eyes watered and she sniffled. The tears were so big and watery, and like lighter fluid they fuelled the burning in her eyes. She tried desperately to wipe her tears away but it was like cutting the head of one of those mythological creatures where two more heads grows in its place.

The more she tried not to cry the more tears forced themselves out. It was pretty quiet at first but she was so overwhelmed, pretty soon she was a blubbering mess. She threw her head over Brittany's shoulder and hugged tight. She held on to Brittany, pressing her whole body into her and clenching hard at her shirt. She was shaking against Brittany and whimpered in her ear.

Brittany stroked Santana's back, comforting her and calming her. She loved having Santana close again, if it weren't for the fact that Santana was weeping, Brittany couldn't be happier. Santana cried and cried and cried as minutes went by and Brittany waited for Santana to pull away but she didn't.

Her crying calmed down but she still didn't want to let go of Brittany's body, which was warming her in the chilly breeze. She didn't want to move away because then she wouldn't be able to smell Brittany anymore. So she held on, and the firmer her hold got, the firmer Brittany hugged her back. Santana felt safe in Brittany's arms. For the first time in a very long time she felt safe again. She soaked it up, drowned her whole body in it, and then she could move back.

Brittany smiled at her. Santana smiled back and wiped her cheeks with both hands. Brittany stretched a hand out to help and Santana closed her eyes at the touch. It took a second but she soon realized she had Brittany's breath on her lips. Santana opened her eyes to confirm it.

"Not yet." Santana interjected before the other woman's lips could press against hers. Brittany moved away again and even though she looked disappointed she nodded understandingly. Then her face morphed into fear.

"But this isn't good bye, is it?" She asked almost inaudibly. Santana shook her head.

"No. It's not good bye." Santana said with a little smile pulling at the corners of her mouth. Brittany smiled in relief. It was quiet for a while. Brittany looked at anything and everything and Santana just looked at her nervous eye-flickering.

Even more seconds past by and soon Brittany realized that Santana's eyes were on her so she finally fixed her gaze on Santana and mustered up enough courage to ask something that for some reason made her more nervous and giddy than everything they had just talked about.

"Can I take you out on a date?"

* * *

><p><strong><em>2 weeks later<em>**

* * *

><p>"Okay, you win!" Brittany said in half a chuckle, opening the door for Santana so she could walk out into the dark street.<p>

"That was the best ice cream I have ever tasted." She continued after letting go of the door and taking a few hurried steps to catch up.

"See! You don't have to go to the other side of the world to find it." Santana joked and referred to just last week when Brittany said she wanted Santana to taste her favourite ice cream. Santana had agreed and thought they were going to the store but Brittany flew them to the Dominican Republic on her private jet.

Brittany tried to not spend too much money since Santana had called her out on it once but not spoiling her was so hard and sometimes Brittany couldn't help herself. Besides, after that little adventure Santana had kissed Brittany. It hadn't been long or wet but it had been warm and amazing.

"Well, Santo Domingo is not on the other side of the world… and you have to admit that was pretty damn tasty too!" Brittany chuckled back and poked Santana's arm.

It had been a very good date. The last two weeks had been full of good dates, great dates and awesome dates. The girls had missed each other very much but in all the anger and hurt they had forgotten how good it felt to actually spend time with each other.

Brittany wanted to take Santana's hand as they strolled back to Santana's apartment but she was still a little reserved. She was overly afraid to do something that would make Santana uncomfortable and didn't want to rush her in any way, so she waited patiently until Santana made the moves.

It was like Santana read Brittany's mind because their knuckles grazed and then Santana interlocked fingers with her. Once contact was initiated Brittany didn't hold back and squeezed Santana's hand tight as they walked in the dark.

Brittany felt a little chill in the cold night. She looked down and saw that her jacket was open. She wanted to close it, but zipping it up would mean letting go of Santana's hand and she didn't want to do that. She tried to be as discrete as possible as she struggled with one hand.

When Santana saw what Brittany was doing she had to laugh a little. It was the cutest thing seeing Brittany fumble with the chain as it absolutely refused to zip up. She sported a concentrated pout, now so lost in the task that she was completely oblivious to the fact that Santana was looking at her.

"You can have your hand back if you want…?" Santana said gently, straightening her fingers so Brittany's could slip out of the grip. Brittany was shaken from her deep concentration.

"Huh? No! No, I don't need it." Brittany ensured and held on tighter to the hand in hers. She gave the closing of the jacket another go, but admitted defeat when it still wouldn't zip up after her thirtieth try.

"Here, let me." Santana said and stopped them both. She positioned herself to stand face to face with Brittany. She slipped her hand out of Brittany's slowly while giving her a reassuring smile. Brittany relaxed when she saw that smile. Santana grabbed the bottom of Brittany's jacket, hooked the clasps into one another and zipped up.

Santana held her hand there, over Brittany's heart, for a moment. Brittany instantly felt warmer but it was more from Santana's touch rather than the closed jacket. Shy but meaningful looks were exchanged and then Santana put her hand on Brittany's arm and let it slide down until they held hands again.

They chatted comfortably with each other while walking, and the occasional extra tight squeezes of their hand-holding and the giggling and laughing had them both loving the night. They reached Santana's apartment building and Brittany felt her stomach tighten. Part of her loved saying good bye to Santana because the last couple of dates that had meant that she would get to kiss her, but an even bigger part hated saying good bye because not being with her was excruciating.

"Thank you for today." Brittany beamed as they stopped in front of the door.

"I had a really good time too." Santana said and smiled, tilting her head back a tiny bit since her date was a little taller.

Santana parted her lips ever so slightly and when Brittany saw it she instantly felt a jolt of excitement run through her body. She leaned in, but let her hand run up and hug the back of Santana's neck gently before letting their lips collide.

The kiss was careful, but they both had slightly parted lips to create that perfect fit they had. Brittany held on, with a bit of suction, for as long as she dared before moving her head back again.

A small, barely noticeable, whimper escaped Santana's lips at the loss of contact and Brittany felt encouraged to kiss her again. She leaned in once more, with the pinch of hesitation going out the window when Santana put her arms around Brittany's neck. The kiss was still cautious but their lips moved against each other now, and made it deeper with every second it lasted.

Brittany didn't know what was going on inside her but she suddenly felt more confident and her grip on Santana's waist tightened and she pulled the woman closer, pressing their bodies together. She ran her tongue over Santana's upper lip and Santana opened her mouth more and massaged Brittany's tongue with her own. Brittany moaned into the kiss. It was the first time since they started seeing each other again that their tongues met.

Santana started pulling away. Brittany didn't want it to end but she withdrew her head and let some air seep in between their bodies. Santana's hands slid down from where they had rested on her neck and she took Brittany's hands in them. Brittany got ready to say good bye.

"Come upstairs?" Santana almost blurted. Brittany just looked into those brown eyes for a moment, waiting for Santana to take it back. She wanted to go upstairs _so bad_ but she didn't want to do it if Santana wasn't ready. When Santana's face didn't change Brittany gave her answer.

With her heart going a million miles an hour she did her best to nod calmly. One of Santana's hands let go of Brittany and pressed the combo of numbers to buzz them in, while the other held on, leading Brittany all the way upstairs and into the apartment.

"The place looks different." Brittany stated and curiously looked around as they took their shoes and coats off. She couldn't really put her finger on it until Santana explained.

"Yeah, well you know… since Emma moved out it's not as tidy as it used to be."

Brittany looked around. The place wasn't really messy, at all, but the symmetry of things was different. Things weren't perfectly aligned or carefully placed and it gave the home a different vibe. The place also had a stronger smell of Santana. It had always been there, but it had lingered in the background behind different shampoo, perfume and lots of detergent, and cleansers. Now the whole place smelled like Santana's bedroom. Brittany inhaled deeply, soaking in Santana's essence.

"I like it here." Brittany already regretted saying it; she thought she sounded like a child. Santana didn't think so though, she liked that Brittany liked her apartment and thought it was sweet that she would say so.

"I like having you here." Santana returned and shyly smiled at Brittany who beamed back.

"Can I get you anything?" Santana proceeded to ask but went into the kitchen before Brittany got a chance to answer. Brittany followed and contemplated whether or not she was hungry or thirsty for anything.

"No, I'm fine." Brittany said to Santana who had already opened the fridge and was looking inside. When she heard Brittany's answer she closed it again. She didn't want anything if Brittany didn't want anything. Brittany just knew it.

"You can still have something if you want." Brittany said and raised an eye brow as she waited to see if her guess was right. Santana blushed.

"No, I'm fine too." She said quietly and looked down at the floor.

"You're sweet." Brittany reached her hand out and pulled Santana into a lazy hug. They giggled but Brittany soon felt Santana tense up with her cheek resting on Brittany's shoulder. Brittany got scared she had done something wrong.

"Britt?" Santana started softly.

"Yeah?" Brittany answered and felt her heart speed up again.

"You make me really happy." Santana murmured. After she had said it Santana lifted her head and let their foreheads rest against each other. Through Brittany's smile Santana felt her warm and humid breath on her lips and even though she loved it she couldn't stand not kissing Brittany for one more second.

She lunged into a kiss, taking Brittany's bottom lip into her mouth and letting her tongue flick over it. With both her hands Santana hugged Brittany's face, not allowing her to move away.

The passionate kiss became wetter as their tongues danced with each other. Santana tasted a hint of vanilla ice cream on Brittany, and the smell of raspberry sorbet on Santana's breath drove Brittany crazy. Santana pressed her body against Brittany's, feeling the contact burn like fire.

Brittany's hand began to wander, from far down on Santana's hips they went higher. When they reached ribs, Brittany gently pushed Santana backwards and slightly sideways, then hoisted her up on the counter and stepped between her legs. Her hands moved to Santana's back and lower again, reaching under the hem of the shirt; feeling the naked caramel skin under it.

She traced her fingertips up Santana's spine, giving goose bumps. Santana moaned into their kiss and felt her hands roam over Brittany like they were magnetically forced to. One hand travelled from the side of Brittany's face along her neck and down to her chest. Santana felt a stiff nipple poke her palm through Brittany's shirt. She hadn't realized Brittany wasn't wearing a bra. Santana lost all inhibitions, she had never been more ready for Brittany and her whole body was screaming for more. She pulled away from the kiss.

"Take me to bed." Santana whispered hoarsely and pressed her lips against Brittany's again. Brittany was so worked up she almost came on the spot, but she grabbed a hold on Santana and carried her to the bedroom, not letting their lips break apart.

She placed the woman on the bed gently and then stood up straight. As Santana's hands slipped off Brittany when she could no longer reach; Brittany grabbed the bottom of her shirt and pulled it over her head, stretching her arms far over her head. Santana was in awe when she saw Brittany's exposed chest and stomach.

After dropping her shirt to the floor Brittany got on the bed with Santana. She pulled Santana's shirt off as well, unclasped the bra and manoeuvred it off. With their breasts crushed together they kissed lasciviously and completely lost themselves in the thrill of being so close again. Brittany felt along Santana's waist and hip but her hand kept sliding over onto thick jeans when it moved lower.

Sucking down on Santana's lip Brittany moved herself up, their lips being the last of their body parts to separate. Santana's hands flew to Brittany's button as Brittany opened Santana's, and in record time both pairs of pants were discarded of, and lying on the floor. A dash of hesitation hit as she looked down on Santana's panties.

She looked up and saw Santana biting her lip with anticipation in her eyes. With newfound confidence and calm, Brittany hooked her fingers in the lace material and brought it down to Santana's feet in a painfully slow pace. Her eyes followed their journey as her fingers grazed over smooth legs.

When the panties were completely off Brittany's eyes locked on Santana's glistening sex. She could almost see Santana's heartbeat between her legs. Brittany was amazed, mesmerized, hypnotized. Santana smiled shyly when she saw the taken woman and raised her body up slightly tugging on Brittany's underwear as well. Brittany assisted and flung the panties across the room.

Lowering herself down on Santana again Brittany plunged into Santana's lips and pressed her upper body against Santana's. Their naked skin felt so good against each other, like every centimetre of Brittany's body had a soul mate in Santana's. Brittany positioned one leg between Santana's and pressed her upper thigh against the center. She moved it leisurely while Santana rocked back into it, feeling the motion becoming more and more effortless as more of Santana's wet juices lubricated the friction.

"_Hhrruurmm."_ Santana hummed without breaking the kiss. Brittany smiled at the noise. _God_, she had missed those little sounds. She moved her lips, kissing Santana's jaw line, following it to the ear and then down her neck.

"_Krruuuuh_" Santana moaned when Brittany moved even lower, kissing open mouthed over Santana's chest. Santana moved one hand into locks of blonde hair, pressing her closer as Brittany sucked on one of Santana's nipples. Santana felt Brittany dripping on her thigh and felt the sudden need and want to touch.

"_I want to feel you_." Santana whispered and raised her body again, sitting herself up completely. Brittany's body moved with her like a shadow. Santana tugged on the leg Brittany had between her own and Brittany moved it, straddling Santana and hugging hips between her own thighs.

In this position Brittany was almost a full head taller and Santana's face dove in between Brittany's breasts. Brittany threw her head back and let out a pleasured groan when feeling Santana's tongue play with her breasts. Flicking her tongue over one pink nipple; Santana's hand moved up and took the other breast in it, massaging it firmly.

Brittany lifted her head again, and tilted it forward and down against the side of Santana's face with her panting breath dangerously close to Santana's ear. Santana's hand tended to the breast for a few more moments before her burning desire for Brittany made it impossible to not move south. While still forcing it hard against creamy skin; Santana moved her hand lower over Brittany's stomach to cup her sex.

Brittany inhaled urgently at the heated contact and Santana moaned as she felt the gushing wetness coat her fingers. Santana felt around, moving up and down and back and forth over Brittany's folds and kneading and flicking over the clit.

"_Saahnthaanaah."_ Brittany moaned with heavy breathing in Santana's ear and turned her face to completely bury it dark locks of hair. Santana found Brittany's entrance and slowly dipped one finger inside.

"_Mmmmmm."_ Brittany hummed and nodded slightly against Santana. Santana let that finger tease in and out a couple of times but soon added a second finger and went deeper.

"_Mm-hmm."_Brittany groaned and her hands spastically clenched to Santana's back. It arched Santana's back and brought the two even closer. The only thing keeping them from becoming one was Santana's arm moving between them. Santana's thrusting inside Brittany increased in speed and depth and her palm jounced against the clit with each push inside.

In slightly jerky motions Brittany moved one hand from Santana's back over to her front and down to her center. Brittany drenched her fingers in Santana's steamy wetness and moved to massage the clit. They rocked together in a perfect rhythm. Brittany's humming moans got louder and louder, her hand's grip on Santana's back tightened and the tingle in her lower abdomen was growing to pop any second.

"_Are you close_?" Santana asked huskily while continuing her motions inside Brittany.

"_Uh – hhuuh._" Brittany moaned and held back her orgasm, working Santana's swollen nub until Santana's unsteady breathing let Brittany know that she couldn't hold on any longer either. While tumbling over the edge herself, Santana crooked her fingers inside Brittany and a jolting shiver went through Brittany as she exploded and pressed harder against Santana's clit in response.

"Gluuuh Gohd!" Santana squealed with Brittany's fingernails digging into her back. Brittany had to move her face out of Santana's hair to be able to breathe and moaned loudly into the room.

They shuddered against each other, pressing themselves closer as they continued to calmly rock their bodies in unison. Their heavy breathing refused to come down and they both twitched in aftershock every now and then due to their mutual peak.

Santana pressed her lips against Brittany's shoulder, gingerly kissing the still tan, but always milky skin. Brittany moved her hand from Santana's sex and wrapped that arm around Santana's neck to join her other arm again. Santana pulled out of Brittany and snaked her hand around her back.

With Santana still placing soft kisses on Brittany's shoulder the embrace converged them even more, and pressed their stomachs together. Brittany smiled against Santana's temple and Santana felt something swell up inside her. It had been there for so long now that it was impossible to keep it inside. She felt it in the room, she felt it in her mind, she felt it in her heart.

"_I love you."_ Santana whispered against Brittany's skin. It was the first time Santana said it out loud to Brittany, who felt her eyes tear at the bliss of finally hearing it. Flexing every muscle in her body, making the hug as tight as could possibly be, Brittany instantly said it back and for the first time; she could add that little _'too'_ that makes all the difference.

* * *

><p><em>I wanna comment on two things.<em>

_1) The realism of this story… whatever it's fiction ;)_

_2) This struggle is kinda worked out here but the story is far from over. I have some stuff I wanna deal with and a few milestones I wanna be there for so you can expect more fluff, more smut and a dash or two of some more drama. If you feel satisfied, you could tune out but I think you should stick around!_


	16. Chapter 16

Not really a filler but not really leading the story anywhere either. It just is. Maybe a nice break for the girls ;)

One more thing, I have tumblr now. I think I need a tutor in how to work that shit but click to my profile if you wanna check it out, maybe give suggestions or ask questions or just discuss this story or well, anything really! But don't forget to review still :)

**CHAPTER 16**

**"A Day of You and Me"**

Brittany woke up first the next morning. Her body just knew that she didn't want to sleep away more of these moments than necessary. Last night she had been really tired but she refused to let herself fall asleep, forcing her eyes open for as long as she possibly could, because she wanted to savour everything exhilarating about having Santana in her arms again.

Brittany was laying big spoon with both her arms around Santana and she could feel Santana's chest move with every breath. Their bodies followed each other's curves and they fit together really well. Whenever Brittany felt Santana stir under her she used it to press the two closer. If they were to be any closer now they would practically be just one person.

A strand of dark hair rested across Brittany's face and it tickled, but she didn't bother to try and remove it. Instead she buried her face and nose deeper in Santana's hair and smelled it. All the tentative worrying and fumbling with what's appropriate and what's too much had just fallen away and Brittany could just be.

With her face turned away from Brittany's Santana blinked a few times as she woke up. At first she didn't know where she was but she soon realized that she was in her own bedroom. Then she couldn't tell exactly what was different.

During the night she had gotten so used to touching, and it was so natural, that she barely felt it at first. When she heard Brittany take a deep breath by her ear she filled with excitement and that's when she realized that every single one of her limbs was duplicated as Brittany's corresponding ones followed their extension.

Easily but not effortlessly she turned around in Brittany's arms so they faced each other. Their legs tangled up with each other and if it weren't for the difference in skin color you wouldn't have been able to tell which leg belonged to whom. Brittany exposed her teeth in a smile as Santana nuzzled up by her collarbone, kissing it gingerly and breathing against the skin.

"Mornin' sleeping beauty." Brittany chirped.

"Good morning." Santana mumbled back, still not quite awake.

"Did you sleep well?" Brittany asked, bubbling with excitement.

"I did." Santana murmured and placed a longer kiss on Brittany's neck. "I had a dream about you." She continued when she pulled away from the kiss. Brittany got butterflies in her stomach and her grin widened even more. She felt like a kid on Christmas… or like herself on Christmas.

"What did I do?" Brittany asked lovingly, stroking Santana's arm.

"You saved my life." Santana answered, still sounding sleepy but now wide awake and nervously awaiting a reaction.

"That's nice." Brittany murmured, high on love. Then she tensed up. "Although, I hope I never have to do that in real life." She added, tortured by images of Santana hurt or sick, or kidnapped, or drowning, or getting shot, or getting run over, or falling from a tall building. She squeezed Santana's body tighter, trying to protect her.

"You already have." Santana said, now speaking clearly and pulling away from the hug. She saw the love in Brittany eyes and reached up to kiss gently on the lips. They smiled amorously at each other for almost a full minute until Brittany's smile morphed into something more playful.

"Say that thing again." Brittany beamed.

"What thing?" Santana toyed even though she knew what Brittany meant.

"You know! The thing!"

"Sorry, B. I don't know what you're talking about." Santana insisted and tickled Brittany who squirmed and squiggled while trying to hold back childlike laughter. When Santana stopped tickling, she found Brittany's blue eyes and stared into them while also leaning in for a kiss. Brittany kissed her gently and fumbled around their bodies trying to find Santana's hand to interlock their fingers. When her task was completed Santana pulled away from the kiss.

"I love you, Brittany." Santana beamed with a delayed opening of her closed-kissing-eyes.

"I love you too, Santana." Brittany breezed back and felt it out to her very fingertips.

"Okay, now you say it first." Santana said playfully and lifted herself slightly to hover over Brittany. Brittany just smiled at all the adorableness emanating from Santana's face.

"I love you, Santana."

"I love you too, Brittany."

* * *

><p>After another hour and a half of cuddling and snuggling in bed, followed by a long steamy shower together, lunchtime was closing in on them.<p>

Santana stood in front of the mirror, blow-drying her hair while Brittany was putting lotion on her arms and long legs. Santana's eyes zeroed in on the in the reflection. She already felt herself getting really worked up again. Seeing Brittany rub the lotion all the way from her foot and up, dangerously close to her panties, was an intoxicating sight and impossible to break away from - if it hadn't been for Santana almost burning her scalp with the hot air from the hair-dryer.

"Aaow, fuck!" Santana exclaimed and pulled the dryer away from her head and also flicking it off with her fingers. The loud humming stopped and Brittany's eyes shot a worried look over to her cursing girlfriend.

"You okay, baby?" Brittany wondered gingerly. Santana didn't answer but just rubbed the hurting spot on her head and pouted. Brittany thought Santana was so adorable it was hard for her to not smile when looking at her. She moved closer and snaked her arms around Santana's waist from behind. She kissed Santana's cheek repeatedly until she could see in the mirror that she had turned the frown upside-down.

"Britt? You don't have to work today, right?" She asked hesitantly.

"Right! I'm unemployed, remember?" Brittany confirmed and smiled at Santana in the mirror.

"Do you have other plans, or anything?" Santana asked with even more hesitation and was afraid to meet the blue eyes.

"No…" Brittany continued, still smiling and shaking her head. She loosened her grip on Santana and took a little step back. "… not today."

"Oh okay." Santana answered and felt her cheeks fill up with red. She turned the hair dryer on again and with the loud noise it provided she thought the conversation was over.

"San?" Brittany asked with a crooked smile. Santana barely heard her but saw her lips move in the mirror so she switched the dryer off.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think maybe I could just hang with you today?" Brittany asked, still sporting the skew smile and raising an eyebrow. Santana looked at Brittany and knew that she knew exactly that that was what Santana wanted to ask. Now Santana felt silly about having been too shy to ask her to spend the day together. She also felt grateful that Brittany just played along but a little embarrassed about being so transparent.

"Yeah, sure." Santana answered and tried to sound as aloof as possible but couldn't force down the pull at the corners of her mouths.

"You're so cute." Brittany chirped and pulled Santana in for a hug, turning her around with a tug at her arm to make them face each other again. Santana pondered for a while on how to reverse the roles.

"I'm not cute." Santana mumbled into the embrace.

"You're endearing." Brittany tried again but felt a shake against her shoulder.

"You're… charming?"

"Nu-uh." Santana protested with a seductive smile and lifted her head to play with her lips close to Brittany's.

"You are... gorgeous." Brittany stated and was rewarded with Santana's lips moving closer to her own.

"You're hot." Brittany almost blurted, excited about getting closer and with an almost trembling voice she earned a kiss. Santana pulled away but Brittany instantly wanted more.

"And you're really sexy." She breathed on Santana's face, who immediately pressed her lips against Brittany's again. This time parting them teasingly with her tongue and darting it in her mouth. Brittany moaned at the wet contact. Santana smirked into the kiss and pushed Brittany up against the cold tile wall. Following Brittany's jaw line; Santana kissed her way to the ear. Upon hearing and feeling her ear fill with Santana's moist breath Brittany groaned again and bucked her hips against Santana.

"You hungry baby?" Santana whispered huskily in Brittany's ear.

"Uh-huh, yeah." Brittany grunted and pressed her palms against the tile wall to express some of her sexual energy.

"Me too." Santana wailed quietly and slowly licked Brittany's earlobe. Brittany shivered and shut her eyes hard. Santana's smirk grew even bigger than before, and then she retracted with a full step backwards.

"I'm thinking sushi. That okay with you?" Santana said and tilted her head in a questioning manner. Brittany's eyes opened wide with disappointment due to the confusing words and loss of contact.

"But… I thought-?"

"Oh yeah. I'm gonna rock your world…" A seductive smile spread across Santana's face once again. "… tonight." Santana turned around and walked out of the bathroom, her hips swaying slightly more then usual. Brittany stood panting against the wall for a few more seconds, cooling herself.

"So fucking hot."

Santana pushed the shopping cart in front of her slowly as her eyes carefully searched the shelves for everything she wanted to buy. A few feet behind her Brittany was giving quarters to three little kids who wanted money for the gumball machine.

"Britt?" Santana called for her and Brittany's eyes shot up, but she still had the same smile she gave the children. It looked… maternal.

"Did you even check with their parents?" Santana asked but didn't really care about the answer. She thought Brittany was adorable either way. Brittany suddenly looked a little more insecure and turned her attention back to the kids.

"Spend it wisely, kay?" She chirped and then quickly rose to her feet and hurried back to Santana.

"Babe, are we going to your place or my place for dinner?" Santana wanted to know after stopping at the spice rack.

"Whichever." Brittany beamed and pretended to intensely search the spices as well, even though she had no idea what Santana was looking for.

"I have to swing by mine again but let's go to your place. You have a nicer kitchen." Santana said and picked out two spices and threw them in the cart. Brittany nodded and started walking next to the moving cart. Santana grabbed a few more things on their way to the register.

"You don't even like Gummy bears?" Brittany questioned when Santana grabbed a bag without thinking.

"I know, but you do." Santana shrugged.

"You know what I like?" Brittany wondered and smiled.

"Of course I know what you like, don't be silly." Santana gave Brittany a casual shrug in return and started walking again.

"What else do I like?" Brittany asked and had Santana coming to a stop again. Santana couldn't see what the big deal was but she was more than happy to share her knowledge.

"Okay, uhm, you love chocolate milk but you're favorite ice cream is vanilla. You love unicorns but ducks are cute too. You like fresh berries with whipped cream. You can't help but help others. You love croissants. You drink red whine, but you prefer white. You can dance for hours without getting tired. You love the ocean. You're addicted to One Tree Hill and your favorite color is red..." Santana's voice faded into a more and more coy one, as she saw Brittany's face light up with every new fact she dropped. She had plenty more but Brittany's face looking like that was very overwhelming.

"I can't believe you know all that." Brittany said and shook her head gently.

"Girlfriends know that stuff." Santana said shyly and took a step closer to Brittany.

"For example; I also know you like it when I do this." She continued and leaned to kiss Brittany. She had only meant it to be quick peck on the lips but Brittany's hands flew up and hugged Santana's face, holding it close for several seconds while her lips moved against her amazing girlfriend's.

The chilly grocery-store air heated up and the world faded away for a while. When they pulled away from the kiss several people in the store where looking at them. Some looking with admiration, some with scepticism and one grumpy old guy with disgust. Santana and Brittany, on the other hand, were only looking at each other. Pools of blue diving into depths of brown. Brittany opened her mouth to speak.

"You're amazing."

* * *

><p>Santana cooked them one hell of a meal in Brittany's exclusive, but barely used, kitchen. Brittany helped best she could but really; she though it was more fun to distract Santana with sweet lady kisses.<p>

They ate by the table and Brittany thought it was positively the most delicious meal she had ever had. Both being extremely full, they decided to just snuggle up on the couch and watch a movie. 'The World Unseen' had Brittany squirming with anger throughout most of the film but now when the credits were rolling they both smiled and nuzzled up closer to each other.

"Thank you for being with me all day today." Santana murmured against the crook of Brittany's neck. Brittany pulled away slightly to be able to look at Santana.

"Are you kidding? There's nowhere in the world I'd rather be!" Brittany exclaimed and thought Santana was silly but adorable for thanking her for such a thing. Delighted with Brittany's words Santana kissed Brittany softly, careful not to deepen the kiss too fast.

When Brittany opened her mouth even more to slip her tongue in Santana's mouth, Santana teasingly pulled away. Brittany looked shy. Santana immediately knew what she was thinking about. But this time it was Santana's turn to tease.

"San? Remember that thing we talked about earlier?" Brittany tried bashfully. Santana shook her head.

"Sour patch kids are just gummy bears that turned to drugs?" Santana suggested.

"No, before that."

"Dr. Pepper is a dentist?" She tried again.

"No, before that!" Brittany was becoming more eager. Did Santana really not know what she was trying to get at here?

"If God's an evil dwarf?"

"Before that!" Brittany sighed, a little frustrated but trying to hide it.

"The difference between an elf and a slave?"

"No…" Brittany pouted and crossed her arms over her chest. Santana loved beating Brittany at her own game but decided to let Brittany know she was thinking about the same thing.

"Oh! You mean…" Santana moved her hand to let her fingers stroll up the inside of Brittany's thigh. She cupped Brittany's sex and earned a vigorous nod and a suffocated groan from Brittany.

Santana pushed Brittany to lie with her back against the cushions and climbed between her legs. Moving her hips ever so discretely and kissing Brittany's neck; Santana could feel Brittany's heart rate increase.

Before Brittany's hands could wander too far in any direction Santana lifted herself off and skipped away into another room. Brittany grunted, frustrated with being blue balled again… or pink ovaries-ed? She gave Santana almost thirty seconds to return but when she didn't, Brittany couldn't take it any longer.

"Santana!" She called out and got up to chase after. She looked in her bedroom but didn't find her. She peeked into the kitchen but Santana wasn't there either.

When Brittany entered the dining room she saw that one of the chairs had been moved and stood alone and centered in the left-over free space. She barely had time to raise an eyebrow in confusion before she was turned around, tumbled backwards, and practically fell into sitting on it.

Santana moved behind Brittany and pulled both of her arms behind her back. Santana tied them up forcefully, tugging hard on the rope as it locked Brittany's hands in place. Brittany groaned, partly in pain but mostly from being really turned on.

Santana's heels clicked against the hardwood floors as she walked around the chair to stand in front of Brittany again. When the hell did she put those on? Brittany had zero time to ponder on that since seeing Santana in front of her stole all her oxygen and basic brain functions.

Santana was wearing a white shirt, hugging very snugly around her bust and unbuttoned to the point were her black bra was clearly visible, and so were the round mounds of the breasts. The skirt she wore was black but chequered with thin lines of green and the loose tie around her neck was of the same color and pattern.

The skirt was of such length that it barely covered Santana's butt cheeks, but Brittany wasn't exactly complaining about seeing so much of the creamy, toffee-colored legs. When Santana started swaying her hips from side to side Brittany realized music was playing and wondered where it came from and when it had started.

She shook her head to regain some focus and that just in time for Santana to undo a button on her shirt. Brittany gasped for air. She tugged on the rope in an attempt to touch Santana and rip the shirt off, but her hands were held back. Santana smirked. She moved closer to Brittany but continued to sway her hips and proceeded to open yet another button.

With Santana moving closer, Brittany had to tilt her head back slightly. She breathed heavily through her slightly opened mouth. Santana was now down to her last button. As she opened it, Santana leaned forward, her breast hovering closer to Brittany's face and the tie hanging freely in the air, exposing Santana's toned stomach to Brittany.

"Fuuh-ck meh." Brittany breathed but Santana just shook her head slowly.

"Not yet." She whispered moistly in Brittany's ear and with a twirl she had moved behind the chair, and out of Brittany's sight, again. Brittany grunted in frustration. Santana stayed there in complete silence and Brittany's head moved to the side to try and spot something in the corner of her eyes, but with no luck. Santana loved this.

She started walking to the front again. Her skirt lifted a little with every step, showing Brittany her perfect ass in the lace panties. Santana walked further away this time, her shirt sliding off her shoulders slowly, uncovering her back.

When it was completely off and Santana was holding it in her hand she threw it over to Brittany. It landed across Brittany's face, blinding her for a few moments before she shook it off and lifted her gaze back to Santana. Santana turned around, still wearing her bra and the tie rested between her breasts. Brittany didn't know where to look. Her eyes moved up and down and all around, examining every single one of Santana's body parts.

Santana started to come closer again. As she took the steps she played with her hair seductively with one hand, while she let the other roam over herself, moaning slightly when her fingers grazed over the right places.

"Santana, it's not funny." Brittany pleaded and felt like something was about explode between her legs.

"It's kinda' funny." Santana smirked and spread Brittany's legs widely before squatting down between them, her legs so far apart that her knees were touching Brittany's shins. Brittany could see the strip of underwear covering Santana's center and she couldn't take her eyes off it. She arched her back in an attempt to press her own sex against the seat for some release.

Santana unbuttoned Brittany's pants and started tugging on them. Finally! Brittany thought and lifted her butt off the chair best she could to assist. When they were off Brittany expected Santana to proceed with removing her panties and then… you know. Santana kissed and swirled her tongue around Brittany's inner thighs but was careful to not initiate contact with Brittany's sex.

Santana stood up again, turning her back to Brittany and swaying her ass. Brittany once again forgot she was bound and tried to lift her hands to touch, but she still couldn't. She grunted. When Santana heard it she twirled to face Brittany. She leaned down and licked lightly over Brittany's lips while closing her legs again and stepping out from between them to straddle them instead.

Supporting most of her weight with her hands out on the edges of the chair, but still allowing a teasing amount of friction, Santana rocked in Brittany's lap. Grinding against Brittany; Santana forced more and more desperate moans to escape Brittany's lips. With Brittany's face between her breasts Santana rubbed her center against Brittany's bare thigh; wetness seeping through the little bit of underwear.

"Oouuh, God! Santana, I need… oh fuck… you really need to…"

Shifting to rest her weight to rest on Brittany instead, Santana freed her hands to roam over Brittany. She couldn't take Brittany's blouse off but she could open it. Making sure she was still teasingly grinding against Brittany Santana started from the bottom. Button by button was undid and Santana stroked the fabric open, exposing Brittany's bra and breast and even further emphasasing the heaving of Brittany's chest.

Santana's hands each cupped one of the soft breasts. Santana massaged them hard in a slow rhythm and Brittany moaned from the agony at her throbbing sex. One hand continuing the kneading, the other moved to Brittany's back and unclasped her bra. Santana could now reached under the thick fabric to touch Brittany's naked skin.

Santana felt Brittany's nipples stiffer than she had ever felt then before and let out a hum of approval. The desire to feel one in her mouth overtook her and Santana leaned down and wrapped her lips around the pink point. She sucked on it hard and felt it poke against her tongue. Brittany jerked in a deep breath and her lust escaped from deep in her throat.

"Santana, I can't... this is... please. Please fuck me!" Brittany begged, sounding out of breath and tortured. Santana was intoxicated with the breast in her mouth and she just couldn't pull away from it just yet, but she let her hand travel lower between them and Brittany's breathing picked up and became shallow in the extreme anticipation.

Down by the hem of Brittany's underwear Santana wasted no more time, but dipped inside them at once. She felt the warmth reach her digits and fuck, she needed to touch Brittany just as bad as Brittany needed to be touched.

Santana's hand slid lower. It had barely reached the soaked folds, part of her hand stroking over the clit, when she felt Brittany tense up. Brittany twitched and pressed her face into Santana, as she close to screamed out Santana's name. Santana stopped and looked at Brittany who was breathing so heavy you could think she just ran a marathon. She winced in aftershock, the trembles running through her and reaching every last millimetre of Brittany.

"Babe, did you…?" Santana asked after a few seconds, a little bewildered by what just happened. Brittany nodded against Santana, her forehead almost a little sweaty, and she moistened Santana's chest where her panting breath hit the caramel skin.

"Oh…" Santana let out but didn't move her hand out of Brittany's underwear.

"I'm sorry… you're just so… and I couldn't…" Brittany uttered as she lifted her head to look at Santana with apologetic eyes. Santana kissed her lips lazily.

"Don't be sorry." Santana assured. In her mind she gave herself the imaginary hat-lift. A seductive smile spread across her face again. She pressed down on the clit and Brittany gasped for air in reply. "… just know that we're nowhere near finished." Santana grinned and started moving inside the underwear again. Brittany threw her head back.

"It's gonna be a long night for you, B."


	17. Chapter 17

Today I had the unpleasant discomfort of having to watch a man have sex with an exercise ball at the gym. Please discard of that image before continuing on with the chapter...

Some of you mentioned that you wouldn't mind a part two to the previous chapter and honestly, I didn't have one, but since you brought it up I took my laptop, sat down in front of the fire and put my fingers to work – _pun intended_!

But I also wanted to move the story along, because I'm such an eager little fucker that I simply can't help myself… **Therefore chapter 18 is also posted :)**

**CHAPTER 17**

"**Animals"**

"Okay…" Brittany panted. "You've had your wicked way with me, now untie me."

Two things were fighting furiously inside Brittany. One was her utter exhaustion and desperate need to just pass out flat on a bed and two was her burning desire to touch Santana who was still grinding in her lap. Brittany had lost count of how many times Santana had made her cum in this chair now.

"It's 2am already..." Brittany added and thought it justified her desire to be let loose.

"Sweet Britt-Britt, so naive…" Santana smirked and trickled her fingers against Brittany's stomach as they emerged from the panties. It left a little trail of lady juices on her skin but there was plenty more covering Santana's digits and she brought her fingers to her mouth and teased up and down on them with her tongue.

Santana moaned in approval of what she tasted and took one whole finger in her mouth, sucking it and out between her luscious lips. Brittany almost couldn't watch as her hands were itching with need to feel Santana, but she couldn't tear her eyes off the delicious sight either.

"San, you're killing me." Brittany pleaded with puppy eyes. Santana dried her fingers on her skirt and lifted her hands to hug Brittany's cheeks.

"I'm sorry, baby." Santana said softly and kissed Brittany lovingly.

"You're like an animal." Brittany stated when Santana pulled away from the kiss. Santana just sniggered at the statement and kissed Brittany again.

"Like a puma… or a jaguar." Brittany joked and tugged a little at the rope in an attempt to bring Santana's attention back to untying her. With Brittany's big blue eyes staring at her it was becoming harder for Santana to resist fulfilling Brittany's wish.

"Rawr." Santana kidded back and nibbled on Brittany's neck, making the her purr like a kitten.

"I have to pee." Santana blurted suddenly stood off Brittany's lap. She stroked Brittany's cheek but there was still that teasing grin to be found in the corner of her mouth. The heels clicked against the wooden floor as she headed off.

"Santana, wait! I'm still tied up!" Brittany whined with a little pout. Santana turned around in the doorway and threw Brittany an air kiss but didn't free her hands.

She would untie Brittany soon, she just really loved the effect she could have on her girlfriend. True though was, that even without using her hands, Brittany had a very similar effect on her girlfriend. With every orgasm Santana gave Brittany; she felt her own building up. She _needed_ to be touched.

Santana reached to pull her panties up over her legs again but stopped herself knee height. They were soaked through anyways and she had a sneaking suspicion that she wouldn't need them much longer so she let them fall to the floor where she stepped out of them.

She flushed and while washing her hands she looked herself in the mirror. She looked like sex. Her lips were swollen from hungry kissing, her hair was a little messy and she had two hickeys on her neck and another on her chest. She ran her finger over each of them. _Marked_. She wasn't sure how she would hide them at work tomorrow but she loved them. She made her way back to the dining room.

"Hey, Britt! Are you ready for more? Silly me, I forgot to put my underwear back on." She called as she walked down the hallway but almost choked on the '_on'_ when she was met with the sight of the chair - empty. Two seconds passed in confusion and then a moist breath hit her ear.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you that teasing is wrong?" Brittany asked hoarsely, her fingers slowly worming their way up the inside of Santana's thigh from behind. This was coming from Brittany? The queen of teasing.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you what goes around comes around?" Santana asked back, surprised with the sound of her voice – so thick with arousal. Brittany was delighted to find that Santana was indeed no longer wearing panties as her fingers parted Santana's inner lips with ease and she ran her digits up and down Santana's drenched slit. Santana quivered and wanted to slam her hands hard against something, but since they were standing in the middle of the room just clenching her fists would have to do.

"You were saying about teasing?" Santana asked huskily. She wanted Brittany inside her, _now!_

"You were saying about karma?" Brittany returned with a smirk and guided her index finger to Santana's entrance, dipping inside painfully slowly.

"Oh God!" Santana squealed, hugging the bottom hem of her short skirt to keep her hands from interfering. Brittany felt a sticky drop of Santana's wet arousal tardily surge its way down her finger and it sent desperate chills through her.

Santana's heavy breathing, her chest's deep heaving and the smell of sex in the room – it was all too much for Brittany to be able to control herself.

"Fuck it." Brittany grunted and turned Santana around, pressing her up against the nearest wall, where she immediately attacked with kisses. Starving lips and strenuous tongues couldn't get enough of the other's taste and feel.

"_Phmmuuuh."_Santana uttered with Brittany's first push inside her. Santana lifted her arms, one hand running through Brittany's hair as the other swung around her neck, forcing them closer. While kissing Santana's neck; Brittany withdrew from Santana's center and grabbed one of Santana's legs, bringing it around herself.

"Keep it there." Brittany warned eagerly against Santana's skin and felt a nod in response. Brittany traced her fingers towards Santana's sex again, leaving lionessy claw marks on the inside of her thigh. The teasing game was long gone and Brittany thrusted two fingers furiously fast inside Santana, smacking sounds singing with Santana's moans and rapid breaths.

"_More, uuuh more!"_ Santana begged. Brittany's free hand flew to knead Santana's breast hard. She added a third finger without stopping, or even slowing her thrusting.

"Oh God, Brittany!" Santana exclaimed at the sensation and her arms around Brittany's neck reached lower down the back; the bend of Santana's arms resting on Brittany's shoulders as she dug her nails into skin. Suddenly Brittany stopped with her fingers deep inside Santana and she leaned up to her ear.

"_I'm gonna make you scream."_ Brittany whispered huskily and started her vigorous motioning again, sucking Santana's earlobe into her mouth.

"_Fuck…"_ Santana breathed with her lip trembling.

Brittany latched on to the skin just below Santana's ear and sucked on it like a leech, giving Santana a fourth mark. Santana stretched her neck out, giving Brittany access to a larger area and showing Brittany how she relished in the branding.

Santana was getting a harder time balancing herself on one leg like a flamingo but she'd be damned it she let that get in the way of what Brittany was doing to her.

Brittany didn't want to leave Santana's rambunctious chest but dropped her hand, letting it find its way inside the skirt too. Soaking her fingers in Santana's natural lubricants she started circling the swelled nub, her other hand still moving in and out if Santana's tight hole. Santana drew a desperate breath and felt a storm blowing up inside her lower abdomen, like a horde of wildebeests thundering across it. She screamed in pleasure, unable to form words. She felt her climax closing in.

Three.

"Yes!"

Two.

"Yes!"

One.

"YEEES!"

For moments everything tightened – her inner walls, her abs, her hold on Brittany. She felt like she was being compressed by an anaconda trying to crush her.

Then everything relaxed – her breathing, her screaming, her muscles.

Despite letting her leg slide off to support on it again, Santana was too tired to stand on her own through her aftershocks so she shifted her weight to her arms. She hung off Brittany who caught her in an embrace.

Brittany was exhausted too, so after holding Santana for a couple of seconds she sunk them down to the floor where they both rested, panting, in each other's arms. After minutes of just heavy breathing Brittany started giggling playfully, her upper body shaking slightly against Santana. Santana lifted her head in response to find the blue eyes.

"That was the best…" Santana lost her words as she moved a strand of blonde hair to behind Brittany's ear, in awe of the beautiful face she was met with.

"It was the most intense…" Santana's words faded again when Brittany's lazy smile grew bigger.

"Ever." Santana finished and let her head fall again to rest it against the floor. Brittany rolled to her side and started kissing the side of Santana's face, from her chin all the way up to her temple. Santana smiled happily but didn't turn her face since she liked the light tickle of Brittany's soft kisses.

"I have this funny feeling…" Brittany said between kisses. "Like I'm satisfied for life but I can't get enough at the same time." She continued and placed a longer kiss by Santana's ear as she let the statement sink in.

"I've never felt that before… it's confusing." Brittany scrunched her nose as she tried to figure out how it worked but she couldn't wrap her head around it. Santana had to turn her head now and look at the little concentrated pout on Brittany's lips.

"You're adorable." Santana said sweetly and chuckled. Brittany's face lit up.

"_You're_ adorable." Brittany argued playfully and bopped Santana's nose.

"You're such a dork." Santana tittered and shook her head.

"I'm so in love with you." Brittany blurted and Santana could see in her eyes that it wasn't something she had meant to say.

"I love you so much." Santana said gently and fought for energy as she lifted her hand to the back of Brittany's neck, pulling her in for a sweet, slow kiss. When they pulled apart Santana sighed.

"I'm literally too tired to move." She complained and felt heavy like an elephant as she half-heartedly made an effort to stand up and go to bed.

"Stay." Brittany ordered and rose to her feet with more ease then she expected from her numb limbs. "I have an idea." She chirped with some mystery bubbling in her voice before she skipped off.

She returned two minutes later, a huge bundle ball of down bed covers and pillows in her arms. She dropped it to the floor and disappeared again, struggling with a mattress pad as she came back a second time. Santana chuckled from where she was still lying on the floor as Brittany set up the temporary bed. Brittany crawled down under the richness of fluff, her eyes sparkling at Santana.

"Well, don't just lie there. Come over here, silly." Brittany invited and lifted the covers to further welcome Santana. Santana rolled her eyes lovingly and slithered the couple of feet like a snake to get to the bed.

"Wow, this is really comfy, B." Santana said in an impressed tone as she settled between the covers.

"Well, what can I say? I have mad skills in bed." Brittany joked and gave a shrug like it couldn't be helped how awesome she was. She wrapped her arm lazily around Santana who chuckled at the double meaning of the words.

"Did I mention you're adorable?" Santana asked and raised her eyebrows.

"Did I mention how I can't get enough of you?" Brittany answered and moved her face closer to Santana's until their noses were touching. Both girls' eyelids were too heavy by now, but they didn't want to stop looking at each other. Brittany yawned and the contagious nature of it had Santana yawning too. Santana gave up first and closed her eyes. Brittany placed a soft kiss on Santana's nose.

"Good night, my beautiful tigress." Brittany mumbled and tiredly let her eyes fall shut.

"Night-night, my precious unicorn."


	18. Chapter 18

I personally think this chapter is kinda messy but I just… I'm getting lazy.

**CHAPTER 18**

"**Forever?"**

"Emma! This is delicious!" Brittany chirped across the table to the cook, who blushed a little.

"You really think so?" Emma asked and smiled coyly.

"Yes, I do!" Brittany said matter of factly. It had been pretty much like this every other Sunday for the last three months – Brittany compliments the food and Emma reassures herself that Brittany isn't lying this time either.

With Emma and Santana not living together anymore and both being wrapped up in their romances they got to see much less of each other these days. Immediately realizing the tragedy, they introduced Sunday dinners with their companions. They took turns hosting it, sometimes at Emma and Puck's, sometimes at Santana's and sometimes at Brittany's, just because her apartment is awesome.

"It really is good. The lime was genius!" Santana confirmed after swallowing another bite. Santana looked lovingly at Emma and thought her friend was positively glowing tonight.

"More wine?" Puck asked but without waiting for an answer he filled Santana's glass up.

"Yes, thank you." Santana said sarcastically since it was too late for her answer to matter. She added a playful wink to let Puck know she was joking. She didn't mind getting a little buzz on tonight. Her shift at the café started late the next day.

"Brittany?" Puck turned his gaze to her and was about to start pouring.

"Oh, no thank you!" Brittany interjected and put her hand over the glass. "Designated driver and, unlike snoozie here, I have to get up early tomorrow." She excused herself and poked Santana in the side. Santana poked her back and the two giggled.

"So, what have you been up to this week?" Emma wondered. Santana furrowed her eyebrows. What had they been up to?

"We haven't been doing much, have we babe?" Brittany asked Santana who shook her head for a while before speaking because she had to swallow another bite.

"No… we helped out at the homeless shelter yesterday, but we always do that on Saturdays so that's not new…" Santana said hesitantly, trying to figure out how the time could just rush by so fast.

"Oh! We saw that dancing show. Gosh, it was so amazing!" Brittany beamed with excitement and joy when she though about it.

"What dancing show?" Emma asked, intrigued, as Brittany's infatuation with the memory was contagious. Brittany opened her mouth to speak but Santana beat her to it.

"Puck! Don't be rude, pour Emma some also." Santana said when she saw Emma's glass empty and Puck putting down the bottle after only having filled his own glass.

"Oh, uhm, no, uhm… bottle's empty!" Puck nervously blurted, but seeing how it wasn't true he brought the bottle up to his lips and drank the rest of the content.

"What the fu-" Santana began but this time Brittany cut her off.

"Oh my God!" Brittany exclaimed and rose to her feet. Emma's eyes widened and flickered to Puck. He looked back at her with an equally fluttering look on his face.

"I'm right aren't I?" Brittany chirped and jumped up and down in an excited manner.

"Well, it's still early…" Emma said quietly but both the Puckermans could no longer hold back their smiles.

"Right about what?" Santana asked confused with her eyes looking from Brittany to Emma, to Puck and back to Brittany. Then she looked at wine bottle and the empty glass.

"Holy shit!" She accidentally blurted and put her hand over her mouth as she shot up from her chair too.

"That's right!" Puck said, now with pride in his voice. "Tiny Puckasorous is on his way."

Santana walked around the table and pulled Emma to her feet. She hugged her extremely gently; she didn't want to break the baby inside. Brittany wasn't far behind Santana to embrace Emma as well.

"This is so awesome!" Brittany beamed.

"Can I touch it?" Santana asked hesitantly and lowered her gaze to Emma's stomach. Emma brought a hand to her belly and nodded. Santana slowly reached her hand out and stroked it over Emma's tummy.

"It's still so flat." Santana said sceptically. Both Emma and Brittany chuckled.

"I'm only three weeks pregnant." Emma stated.

"It's still the size of…uh, something very small." Puck explained as he had already forgotten the analogy Emma used when talking about the baby.

"I'm really happy for you, sweetie!" Santana quietly but amorously.

"Really?" Emma just had to ask.

"Totally!" Santana ensured. "Now I know you're getting it on."

"Santana!"

* * *

><p>Santana leered seductively at Brittany in the driver's seat. She did a fake yawn, stretching her arms so far over her head they pressed against the roof of the car. When she let them fall again; her left hand had moved noticeably closer to the gearshift. She pretended to fidget with some things and with every second her hand got closer and closer to Brittany's lap.<p>

"What are you doing?" Brittany asked, reluctantly taking her eyes off the road to glance at Santana's hand now stroking the inside of her girlfriend's thigh.

"I'm just gonna check something." Santana said alluringly, reaching higher. Brittany squeezed her thighs together tight, stopping Santana's hand.

"I'm driving." Brittany said matter of factly, not letting go of Santana's hand with her thighs.

"So?" Santana questioned and tried to squiggle her hand to reach the center.

"What if I run over a baby penguin?"

"A baby penguin?"

"Or a duck or a mother squirrel? It's really dangerous to not focus on the road when you're driving, Santana." Brittany said softly to Santana who was now sporting a big pout.

"You're boring." Santana said and withdrew her hand from between Brittany's legs and crossed her arms over her chest.

"You're drunk." Brittany responded, a little grumpy about being called boring. She heard Santana mutter something and turn her head to look out the window

"Don't worry baby. I plan on rendering you naked and taking full advantage of that… just not in a moving death machine." Brittany joked and threw a glance over at Santana but soon let her focus return to the road. Santana eased up on the pouting but continued looking out the window.

Emma and Puck's apartment was quite a while away from Brittany's, and with her refusing to go faster than the legal speed limit it took the couple a full thirty-five minutes to get from place to place. Giving Santana plenty of time to fall asleep in the relaxing murmur of the engine.

"Come on baby, we're home." Brittany said gently, having already walked around the car to Santana's side to assist her up. Santana grunted and threw her arms around Brittany's neck. Brittany tried to drag Santana to her feet, but with no help whatsoever it was close to impossible.

"Really?" Brittany sighed in a despondent voice but put the car keys in her mouth and wrapped one arm around Santana's back and the squirmed the other in under the folds of her knees and lifted the sleeping woman up in her arms. Brittany used her foot to close the car door.

"Babe?" Brittany mumbled while also trying to not drop the keys from her mouth. Santana lifted her head with a jerk.

"Babe, you have to push the button." Brittany said while biting down on the keys. Santana opened her eyes and took the car keys in her hand. She fumbled with it for a while before finding the lock button and pressing it. Brittany started walking.

"You're really strong." Santana slurred, having just realized she was being carried and looking around joyfully as everything was bobbing up and down with each of Brittany's steps, and also slightly spinning due to her blood alcohol level.

The elevator brought them to the top floor and by the time Brittany had gotten Santana inside her arms were practically shaking from exhaustion. She powered through and got to the bedroom with a snoozing Santana in her arms. She gently put Santana down on the bed and took of her girlfriend's shoes and jeans.

Then Brittany removed her own clothes and closed the curtains. As she brushed her teeth she contemplated on whether or not to sleep on the very edge of the bed, giving Santana plenty of space for her drunken roll-arounds.

Returning to the bed and seeing Santana's cute face squished against the pillow, she decided against it and snuggled up really close and wrapped an arm over her stomach.

Upon feeling the heat from the contact and the familiar smell of her shampoo Santana automatically clung to the body pressing against her. Her already dreaming breathing calmed further and her sleep deepened in the crook of Brittany's neck.

* * *

><p>The next morning Santana was woken by an alarm Brittany had set for her before going to her meetings. Santana was still majorly tired despite having slept like a baby all night and she slammed the snooze button with her hand. She buried her face in the pillow.<p>

Two hours until she had to be at the café. God, how she hated working there. It was the least fulfilling job in the world. This is what she has to show for her 23 years of life? A lousy high school diploma, a dead-end shit-job and no ambition?

The alarm went off again and this time Santana forced herself up and off the empty bed. She hated when Brittany left early in the morning. Although Brittany didn't have a job at the moment, she was involved in a lot of volunteer work and help organizations.

Their schedules were good at matching though so they spent a lot of time with each other. Santana usually swapped shifts with Rory and Mercedes to have the same days off as Brittany and Brittany manipulated her schedule best she could to spend more time with Santana. Was it too much? What did they even do anymore? When Emma asked last night; the question had completely thrown Santana. Sure they still went out to dinner together, they went out dancing, it was July so they spent a lot of time on the yacht… It wasn't that Santana wasn't enjoying herself, but everything was starting to feel so… domestic.

"God, why am I even thinking this?" Santana gritted between her teeth and stepped into a cold shower to wash away her hangover.

The apartment stood empty for a few hours and then a key was shoved in the door. Brittany used her forearm on the knob and her hip to push the door open. She carried two big paper bags of groceries but with skillful finesse she made it to the kitchen without dropping anything. She started unloading into the fridge. Most of the things she had bought, she only did because Santana likes to use them in her cooking.

Today Brittany wanted to cook for Santana though. But she had no idea what to do, or how to do it. She didn't exactly have any specialties up her sleeve. Brittany never could get her head around understanding recipes – they're so confusing! How much to use and in what order and the balance of ingredients and how big is a cup anyways? A tablespoon? What is that? Maybe she'd just order take out and serve it on plates. Not that it would fool Santana.

Brittany lost herself in her thoughts as she swept over the apartment, picking up discarded clothes, fluffing cushions and dusting the shelves and the decorative ornaments. Returning to the kitchen she found her phone lying on the table with a lit screen. She slid her thumb across the screen and a text from Santana opened.

**Sanny San-San:**_How hard is it to fucking decide what coffee to fucking order before it's your fucking turn so you don't hold up the fucking line? On second thought I'll just have it black. People are idiots!_

Oh, wow. Santana as in a bad mood. Maybe it would just be best if they had chocolate ice cream for dinner today. Brittany hated seeing Santana miserable at work. She often got texts like these when Santana got frustrated with a customer. If this was like any of the other times though… Yup, the phone buzzed and the screen lit up again.

**Sanny San-San:**_I'm sorry babe. I'm just having a bad day. Can't wait to be hugged by you._

The second texts always made Brittany smile. It was amazing what a big impact so little effort could have when it came from Santana. No one or anything else made Brittany feel so happy.

All Brittany's life she thought she had it all. And if she didn't have it – she could just buy it. She never realized how life changing falling in love could be. It was worth so much more than money. Just one second with Santana gave her the most amazing, tingling feeling. Brittany felt so lucky to be with the most awesomest person in the world.

She got an idea and threw a glance at the time. And hour and a half before Santana would be back. Plenty of time set everything up.

When Santana reached Brittany's front door she just walked in and put her purse down before kicking off her shoes. She never knocked anymore and the door was rarely locked. The portiere knew who Santana was by now and she never had trouble getting in downstairs either. Santana made her way through the room in an attempt to find Brittany.

"What a day!" Santana sighed when she saw her girlfriend reading on the sofa. She reached her arms out and waited for Brittany to get up and hug her.

"Hey, baby." Brittany greeted and rushed over to Santana. She put her arms around Santana's neck and drew her close.

"I missed you so much today." Brittany whispered into the dark hair and heard Santana sigh.

"People were nagging and bitching all day. I couldn't catch a break from the assholes and everyone got their orders wrong or changed their minds halfway through me having already done their half-caff-non-fat-half-soy-milk-but-with-extra-cream-and-nut-meg-bitch-drink. I seriously wanted to kill them all." With a gentle kiss on Santana's cheek after the rant Brittany pulled away and took Santana's hand. With a gentle pull on it she led her girlfriend through the apartment to the very end of it where the master bathroom had music playing inside. Santana's face morphed into a confused frown.

"Babe?" She asked so that Brittany would explain what she was doing. Brittany kept walking without answering.

"Babe, why aren't you talking?" Santana wanted to know but got her answer when the door to the bathroom slid completely open and she was met with dimmed lights and a bubbly, hot bath. It smelled amazing and by the side of the huge tub was a tray with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

"B, this is amazing! But you didn't have to…" Santana started.

"I wanted to." Brittany interrupted and pulled Santana completely inside the room. Her lips dove to her girlfriend's long neck. Santana closed her eyes and just let herself be tended to.

Brittany found the hem of Santana's shirt and she slid it up and off, her lips not parting with Santana's skin for any more time than necessary. Brittany unclasped Santana's bra and when it came off her lips moved lower. She kissed the delicious caramel skin of breast and the darker, almost chocolate colored nipples.

After having kissed both breasts tenderly she continued lower on Santana's stomach. While kissing a circle around Santana's belly button, Brittany unbuttoned the jeans and tugged them down to Santana's feet, the panties following the tight material down. Already down on her knees Brittany's lips now traveled upwards from Santana's lower thigh to her hipbone on both legs. Before standing up again Brittany placed gentle kisses on Santana's smooth mound.

"Baby, get in." Brittany almost whispered and poured a glass of wine, which she handed to Santana when she had settled in the steamy bath. With gentle motions Brittany stripped down as well and stepped into the hot water, lowering herself into it behind Santana. Brittany's lips resumed their gentle massaging on the skin on Santana's back but they were soon replaced by Brittany's hands kneading firmly at Santana's shoulders and shoulder blades. She felt the tension ease under her fingertips. Santana hummed approvingly.

"Mmm, I could just stay here forever." Santana murmured, hanging her head down further. A wide smile suddenly spread over Brittany's face as a thought entered her mind.

"Hey, why don't you?" Brittany's voice was still calm even though her insides were now bubbling with excitement. Brittany wondered why she hadn't thought of this before, they were practically living together already. Santana furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"Don't I what?" She wondered and lifted her head, feeling a little dizzy from breathing in hot steam.

"Stay here forever." Brittany clarified like it was the most obvious thing in the world. The relaxing feelings that had consumed Santana were now being eaten by something else much more unnerving. She turned around in the big tub and saw Brittany's big smile.

"Do you mean like… move in with you?" Santana asked hesitantly and raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah!" Brittany confirmed, now bubbling with excitement and she appeared to be oblivious to Santana's reaction.

"Oh…" Was all Santana could breathe out, completely taken by the suggestion and she wondered why she wasn't jumping up and down in a happy frenzy.

"Or we could move to your place. I don't really care, I just wanna live with you." Brittany added shyly with a rosy color rising in her cheeks. Santana felt around inside but that wasn't the problem.

"Uhm… are you sure we're ready for that? We just started seeing each other again" Santana said quietly but with a hint of panic loudening her words.

"Really? Brittany questioned. "Just? It's been like three months."

"Exactly, you don't think that's little?" Santana asked sceptically.

"Uhm, I guess it's kind of little… compared to all the months I've had in my life and all the ones I have left... but I already know I wanna spend the rest of those with you." Brittany spoke lovingly but her excitement was fading fast.

"You don't _know_ that." Santana snapped and stood up in the tub, soapy bubbles gliding down her body, uncovering more of her naked skin by the second. Brittany looked at Santana.

"Of course I know that. I've never been more sure of anything in my entire life." Brittany said matter of factly. Santana stepped out of the tub and wrapped a towel wound herself. The feeling of freaking out was taking over her mind. Freax was here and she was screaming inside Santana's head.

"Don't say you know something you don't!" Santana bitched

"Look, if you don't know that yet, that's fine. But don't tell me what _I_ do and don't know!" Brittany's tone was angry. She hated when people made her feel stupid, like she didn't even know what she wanted.

"What is this? What are you trying to pull here Brittany?" Santana question spitefully and looked around at the romantic scenery. It earned a confused frown from Brittany. As she started dressing again Santana opened her mouth again.

"Are you just trying to knock me up and tie me down for life?" Santana continued but didn't listen to her own voice enough to hear how ridiculous she sounded. All she heard were the loud screams of panic in her head.

"Santana, what are you talking about?" Brittany wanted to know from her position still in the bubble bath. She genuinely did not understand what was happening. By now Santana was all dressed again and she buttoned her jeans as she continued in an attempt to clarify things.

"You won't have sex with me in the car, and we get home and go to sleep like we're fucking eighty years old." Santana closed her eyes.

"…work and babies and boring…" She mumbled before raising her voice again.

"If this fucking boring life is all you have to offer I don't want it!" Santana threw at Brittany before storming out of the bathroom and rushing towards the exit. She already regretted what she said and wanted to go back and fix it but her feet wouldn't let her. She was almost running as her body slammed against the front door when she tried to open it the wrong way. She crammed herself out and slammed it shut.

Brittany heard Santana leave and held her breath before sliding her head under water and mixing her salty tears with the soapy water.

* * *

><p><em>(Freax is the freaking out version of Snix but you got it)<em>


	19. Chapter 19

Hehe, it's kinda fun to piss you off – but in an I'm-gonna-fix-it way, of course.

**IronRB**, it totally sucks that you're anonymous because then I can't reply and talk to you about it but maybe that's what you want, lol. I totally agree with you by the way, she is still a bit _reserved_… And yes, 18 chapters in is pretty far! But I said a few chapters back that the story was far from over and we're not gonna land on 19 chapters like "I'd die to be with you" did… I'd say probably somewhere around_twice that many,_ so I gots some time to redeem myself, right?

Also, YAY for twice as many reviews as my last story! :))))) But don't stop because I love it too much! :)

**CHAPTER 19**

"**Home"**

"I can't believe she said that!" Rachel exclaimed to draw all the attention away from her sad friend and onto herself. Brittany's eyes were red and puffy. She had been crying pretty much constantly since Santana left the apartment and she hadn't slept all night. She had just been pacing back and forth for hours waiting for Santana to come back. When she finally did go to bed every sound she heard shook her wide awake as she was hoping it to be a returning Santana.

The next day she couldn't take it any longer and called Quinn who of course brought Rachel along.

"Okay so that was a little harsh…" Quinn admitted and gave Rachel a look. They were supposed to comfort Brittany, not make her feel worse. Brittany's mind went through Santana's words again. Seeing as how it was all she could think about, she knew them by heart.

"But she didn't mean it. She loves you_so much_, B." Quinn said assuringly and started stroking Brittany's back in even bigger motions as more tears started pouring down Brittany's cheeks. Brittany wiped under her eyes and under nose.

"Oh honey!" Quinn comforted and pulled Brittany closer. Rachel felt the need to speak again as she was starting to feel like the fifth wheel.

"I for one, would not accept that kind of treatment. Dump her." Rachel said leaned back on the couch. The statement earned louder sobs from Brittany and a stabbing look from Quinn.

"Rachel, please!" Quinn hissed. Rachel put her hands up in defence.

"I'm sorry… I just think Brittany is being a little _whipped._" Rachel explained with a softer voice but her air quotations around the words 'whipped' still had her coming off a little insensitive. Brittany snorted and lifted herself from Quinn's embrace.

"You're calling me whipped?" Brittany asked amused. "You cancelled a wedding you had been planning for two years to run off with Quinn and_I'm_ the one who's whipped?" Brittany joked and actually stopped crying, which was a great relief for her eyes. They were stinging.

Rachel just sat there with her mouth open and rosy cheeks for a while.

"Point taken." Rachel admitted defeat and as much as she loved attention maybe she would just not talk anymore. Quinn threw amorous glances over at her brunette girlfriend. She couldn't believe she had actually gotten what she had prayed for so, so long. She was grateful to Will for taking it relatively well. She was grateful to Rachel for loving her back. Most of all she was so grateful to Brittany for convincing her to go for it. Brittany would always be Quinn's best friend.

"Brittany. Santana loves you. You can feel it in the air just being in the same room as you two." Quinn said to Brittany and could catch her blue eyes with a comforting look. Brittany smiled with her lips and even if her eyes didn't join in the smile she felt a little better.

"Question is…" Quinn continued. "… w_hen_ she comes back, will you be able to forgive her?" Quinn asked with a tilted head and loving eyes.

"I've already forgiven her. I just need her to come back!" Brittany grunted in frustration. Rachel mouthed the word 'whipped' again but neither Brittany nor Quinn saw it.

"She will! I know it, you know it. Rachel knows it." Quinn ensured.

"Well, I..-" Rachel started.

"Rachel knows it." Quinn repeated, interrupting her girlfriend.

"Have you called her?" Quinn wanted to know, while stroking Brittany's cheek.

"No, I… No." Brittany answered and shook her head slightly. She had dialled Santana's number several times but she never had the guts to press call. She was afraid of what Santana might say. She couldn't take more rejection from Santana.

"Doesn't matter." Rachel butted in again, her demeanour having changed a little. "She should come to you." The brunette said lovingly.

"And she will." Quinn added with a head nod.

"Thanks guys." Brittany murmured. She did feel a lot better now and much less lonely.

"Rach and I have to go but if you feel like you want to kill yourself just call me okay, sweetie?" Quinn said and bopped her finger on Brittany's nose. "Just eat _a lot_ of ice cream and watch Love Actually-"

"It's summer." Brittany interjected.

"…Or another love movie... or an action movie – that might be even better. In no time you'll get a call from Santana." Quinn's convincing really had Brittany believing it and it showed in her face. Quinn was relieved to have made Brittany feel better but also hoped she wasn't promising her friend too much.

"Will you be okay?" Quinn asked and hugged Brittany who nodded in the embrace.

"I'll be fine." Brittany confirmed even though she wasn't sure how she felt about being alone again. But maybe a lame love movie could distract her.

"We'll check in on you later." Rachel said, taking Quinn's hand as the two got ready to leave. Brittany nodded again and watched as the couple walked out.

Brittany went to the kitchen and took out a bowl from the cupboard. She filled it with scoops of vanilla ice cream and poured gummy bears on it as sprinkles. Santana had made that for her once when she was sick. Brittany smiled at the colorful bowl and brought it with her to the bedroom. She zapped through her TiVo and decided that a marathon of One Tree Hill would be perfect for the occasion.

* * *

><p>Santana knocked on the door. Her bangs were fast and eager. She waited about two seconds then she raised her fist and knocked again. She was just about to knock a third time when a tired-looking mess opened the door.<p>

Her eyes were red, her hair was a crows nest and her shirt had an ice cream stain on it. Santana had to work up a lot of restraint to keep from crying, knowing she was the reason Brittany looked, and probably felt, like crap. Although somehow, she was still the most beautiful woman in the world to Santana.

Brittany's face was slightly surprised looking at first but changed gradually to something calmer. A barely noticeable smile spread over her lips but she didn't say anything.

"Hey, B…" Santana said slowly and hesitantly and her eyes flickered to different parts of Brittany since it was difficult to maintain eye contact. She was so embarrassed.

"Can I come in?" Santana asked tentatively when Brittany still didn't say anything and her whole body dreaded the answer to be no. She looked beyond the woman in front of her; into the apartment and longed to be in there again. She had messed up real good this time.

"Yeah." Brittany nodded and stepped aside to make way for Santana's entrance. "You don't have to knock." Brittany added and it was meant to be comforting but Santana just felt even guiltier. Why wasn't Brittany screaming at her? Or shutting her out? She knew she deserved it.

"Oh… I didn't know after… you know." Santana said and took a few careful steps inside before stopping to wait for Brittany to close the door and catch up with her. They walked to the living room in silence. Santana's face looked tense while Brittany's looked relieved to have Santana back. When they sat down Santana followed it with a deep breath before speaking.

"Britt. I am so, so sorry!" Santana blurted rather loudly as her guilt was bubbling over and her desire to fix everything was growing huge. Even though Brittany didn't seem very upset Santana's eyes were pleading for forgiveness

"I know. It's fine." Brittany interjected before Santana could continue. She took Santana's hand to try and further ensure that she wasn't angry. Santana clenched the hand tight and found the other as well while shaking her head in disagreement.

"No! No, it's not fine… The things I said… Brittany, it's not okay! It's not okay at all. I feel so bad!" Santana almost cried now and brought their hands to her lap to feel some closeness.

"I don't know what I was thinking… I think I might be having some sort of a life crisis. Being with you and seeing everything you've done and seen in your life has sort of made me realize that I have none of that. I have accomplished nothing and I have no goals for the future…-" Santana spoke quickly as she was trying to explain herself.

"Santana, you're twenty-three years old…" Brittany interrupted.

"I know… I guess I've always thought that getting serious with someone and your life ending was pretty much the same thing... When you asked me to move in it was like, for a couple of seconds, I thought my life was ending without me having done anything with it." Santana continued and saw a slight sadness spread in Brittany's face so she was quick to add more.

"Then I had some more time to think and… Before I met you I had never been outside the country. I had never been on a yacht. I had never gone skinny dipping in someone else's pool. I had never seen a musical. I had never walked down the street holding someone's hand. I had never had hot chocolate and marshmallows in front of a fire. I had never kissed in a waterfall. Before you…" Santana shook her head like she was telling herself how stupid she was.

"I realized… that my life had never really begun before I met you." Santana said and was filled with all the love she felt for Brittany combined with the relief of finally having gotten to good part of her long story telling.

"What you're offering is more than I could have ever dreamed of. And I want it – so very much! So… do you still wanna move in with me?" Santana asked and shut her eyes as she waited for the answer, still fearing it'd be no.

"Yeah. Of course I do." Brittany beamed and her eyes flooded with joy. Santana drew a breath of mirth.

"Good! 'Cause I really want you to knock me up and tie me down for life." Santana joked with a smile and Brittany chuckled through the happy tears streaming down her face. Santana dove into a deep kiss.

They kissed hungrily for minutes, like they had spent years apart and were just being reunited. Nothing had felt as good as being with each other in that moment. They knew they were ready for that next step in their relationship and in their lives. Their hands clung to each other bodies, begging for permission to hold on forever.

When they did pull apart, a small wrinkle between Santana's brows let Brittany know something was still bothering her.

"What's wrong?" Brittany asked concerned and stroked Santana's cheek with her whole hand. Santana's eyes were teary.

"Britt, I don't deserve you." Santana said quietly. She was overwhelmed. Life had been amazing enough to bless her with this beautiful woman in front of her and she almost fucked it up. She promised herself to never abuse it like that again. Brittany sighed.

"You think you're a bad person but you're not. You're amazing. I know you don't see it but you are. So please don't say that again because it hurts my feelings." Brittany said quietly but with assurance. Santana almost flinched.

"Okay, wait… I scream at you like a moron but _that_ hurts your feelings?" Santana asked hesitantly and had a skew smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. Brittany chuckled.

"Pretty much." Brittany nodded playfully and winked at Santana.

"I…- You…- You're incredible." Santana sniffled and a tear fell down her cheek.

"Well, you know…" Brittany smiled and shrugged at her own awesomeness.

"You have ice cream on your shirt." Santana stated and eyed the stain with a little smile.

"Guess I'll have to take it off." Brittany smirked and reached down for the hem, pulling it far over her head, revealing her bare bosom. Santana's jaw fell open a little and she looked like she was about to start drooling.

Brittany laughed and leaned back, pulling Santana down for her to settle between her legs. There was a long kiss full of sweetness and then Santana raised herself up a little. She found Brittany's eyes.

"Can I tell you a secret, Britt?" Santana asked but didn't wait for Brittany to answer before continuing.

"You know how I told you Holly was never my girlfriend? Well uhm… you're actually… you're my first girlfriend." Santana's heart rate increased as she spoke the words and she felt some heat stir in her cheeks. Brittany felt Santana's heartbeat on her and her whole body warmed up.

"San?" Brittany asked and searched for Santana's eyes which were now shyly trying to avoid being found.

"You know how I've had a lot of girlfriends?" Brittany asked and even though just hearing that had a pinch of jealousy creep into Santana, she nodded for Brittany to continue.

"You're the first one I've actually loved." Brittany finished and her face now looked as coy as Santana's. They smiled at each other's firsts.

"Are you scared?" Santana asked softly.

"No." Brittany shook her head gently. "Are you?" She asked back with equal softness in her voice.

"Not anymore." Santana said and looked around the apartment for a second before staring back into Brittany's eyes. "I'm home."


	20. Chapter 20

I have sooo much to blabber about but none of it is relevant to the chapter or even the story so I'll be quiet :)

Speaking of lesbians moving in together;_That's What She Said's U-haul is super funny! (And so is lesbian cliché song)_

**CHAPTER 20**

**"What's mine is yours"**

Dave and Blaine let out loud grunts as they lowered Brittany and Santana's new, heavy couch to the floor. Santana and Brittany looked up from what they were doing at the same time and as they found each other's eyes they couldn't help but giggle a little. They smiled amorously at each other and then at the new piece of furniture which looked absolutely amazing in front of the fireplace.

Brittany was finished with the box she was unpacking and looked around curiously for something else to do.

"B! That was the last of the shit load of heavy things you needed help with." Dave playfully called to Brittany from across the room and she turned her steps to walk in her friend's direction.

"Thank you so much, Dave. I owe you one." Brittany said gratefully when she was close enough to wrap her arms around his big, burly body. He and his new boyfriend were life savers for helping out with the move. Santana had insisted on not hiring moving men and even though both ladies were strong; all the new heavy furniture was just too much for them to do on their own.

Dave lifted Brittany off the floor in the tight hug. It lasted a couple of more seconds and it caught Santana's attention.

"Hands off my woman, Karofsky!" She joked and, even though she wasn't actually jealous since everyone in the room were flaming homosexuals, she just had to walk over there and snake her arms around Brittany's waist from behind. As Santana rested her chin on her girlfriend's shoulder, Brittany's hands quickly slid off Dave to hug the grip Santana had on her belly.

"Well, Blaine and I have to get going. We have Monster truck and figure skating to get to." Dave said and took Blaine's hand.

"Alright, have fun you guys!" Brittany chirped and the two men started exiting the apartment.

"Thank you again for your help!" Santana called after them.

"Let's do dinner next week. On us!" Brittany added and earned happy smiles and nods from Dave and Blaine before the two had made it out of sight.

When Brittany heard the door shut she bubbled over with excitement. It was the first time she and Santana were alone in the apartment as an officially cohabited couple. Brittany turned around in Santana's arms and attacked her with a passionate kiss.

Santana was taken a little by surprise but quickly and happily granted entrance to Brittany's pleading tongue. When Brittany reached inside Santana's shirt Santana pulled away with a crooked smile.

"Brittany Pierce! Are you trying to seduce me?" She joked and nibbled on her girlfriend's pink bottom lip before letting Brittany answer.

"Always." Brittany groaned and dove to Santana's neck.

"Mmm…" Santana hummed approvingly and tilted her head.

"We still have a few more boxes to unpack…" Santana protested without physically putting up any sort of a fight.

"…And I want to be done when Carmen gets here…" Santana continued but moved her hand to the back of Brittany's neck, gently pulling her closer.

"…and she'll be here in like…" Santana reluctantly opened her eyes to find a clock and seeing what time it was woke her from the intoxicating moment and she straightened herself, slightly tensing up under Brittany's touch.

"An hour!" She called out and created some space between herself and her girlfriend. Brittany smiled and withdrew her hands with a quick peck on Santana's nose.

"Such a tease." She murmured lovingly and lifted a heavy box marked with 'books'. Santana gave Brittany a playful slap on her behind and then she returned to the almost empty box she had been distracted from earlier.

"God, you have so many cookbooks." Brittany stated as she placed one after another on the shelf.

"B, is it okay if I put a picture of me and Carmen right here?" Santana asked and held a framed photo of the two in the air above the mantel piece.

"Yes, of course silly. You can put it wherever you want." Brittany chirped and followed it with a smile. Santana put the photo down.

"Kay. Just making sure. It's your pl-"

"Our place!" Brittany interrupted before Santana could finish. Brittany stopped unpacking and turned to Santana who was now sporting an apologetic face.

"I might have lived here first but it's just as much yours now. _What's mine is yours_." Brittany continued and pouted over the fact that they were having this argument again.

"I'm sorry, baby. I'll stop doing that." Santana excused herself when she saw how sad it made Brittany. She had accidently made comments like that all day. She wasn't sure where it came from. She walked over to Brittany.

"Hey…" Santana said softly and stroked Brittany's warm cheek.

"It's important to me that you think of this place as ours. That's why I wanted to buy all this new furniture and redecorate and stuff." Brittany said quietly.

"I know sweetie, and it was a really good idea." Santana said, sounding like she was trying to comfort Brittany. Brittany lifted her gaze.

"Say it. " She said playfully but refused to stop pouting.

"_Our_ place!" Santana articulated exaggeratedly. She took Brittany's hand in hers and stepped to stand next to her roomie instead of in front of her. She looked out over the room.

"_We_ have a really nice apartment." Santana said and smiled, her eyes travelling over it again.

"We do, don't we?" Brittany said and the pout faded to a proud smile.

"Totally!" Santana confirmed. "And I'm gonna pay for half of everything." Santana added matter of factly.

"No, no, no! You don't have to do that!" Brittany was quick to respond.

"Yes, yes, yes! I want to." Santana insisted.

"But it was really expensive and I have…-"

"Look, I know I have a shitty job but you can't keep supporting me like this. It's not fair… to you or to me." Santana spoke quietly but firmly. She had been reluctant to bringing the subject up, but she had been thinking about it a lot since they decided to move in together and she wanted to clear it out.

Brittany was seriously loaded, that was no secret, and Santana made just enough to get by, that was no secret either, but Santana didn't want to start becoming dependant on Brittany for money.

"I don't wanna feel like you're my boss or my mother. I don't know, I don't wanna feel… owned." Santana explained.

It was quiet for a while as Brittany processed what Santana had just said. Brittany hadn't had a thought about it at all, but she understood where it was coming from. She took a deep breath.

"Okay… from now on we pay equally for everything we buy together. But I still want to pay for the furniture… they can be like a moving in gift." Brittany said, her mind a little nervous about pushing it, but her voice steady.

"But I don't have a gift for you…?" Santana argued, still concerned with equality.

"Yeah you do." Brittany chirped and captured Santana's lips with her own.

"And you're gonna give it to me tonight – in our new bed." Brittany wiggled her eyebrows in a suggestive manner and soaked in happiness as Santana giggled at her adorable girlfriend. As she finished unpacking the last of the items she had brought into her new home, Santana wondered how she got so fucking lucky.

The minutes seem to rush by and Santana grew more and more frantic. The more stressed she got, the less she got done and when she heard a knock on the door she realized she hadn't even started cooking yet.

"Oh my God, Brittany! She's here! What do I do?" Santana called out and started pacing back and forth. She was unusually nervous. She hadn't seen any members of her family since she went home for Christmas, which was now over seven months ago.

Santana was close with her family but, even though seven mouths was a little long, she was used to being away from them. This time was different. After what happened with Brittany last summer she had deliberately tried to avoid her family as much as possible because she never told her parents what happened.

Santana felt strong arms around her and it snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Opening the door would be a good start." Brittany chuckled into the hug which did a good job in calming Santana.

"Oh, the door. You're a genius!" Santana kissed Brittany lips once and rushed over to the door just in time for the person on the other side to knock again. Santana took a deep breath with her hand on the knob and then she turned it.

"Carmen! You found us." Santana flung her arms around her baby sister. Carmen tensed up in surprise but soon hugged back. She was still in her Cheerio's uniform from summer cheer camp ending just hours ago.

"Yeah, the guy helped me… _Geez_." Carmen breathed when Santana wouldn't let go of her tight hold. Then she lifted her gaze and looked into the apartment.

_"Sick."_ She murmured between her teeth as she eyed the big open space of the vestibule and the chandelier hanging in the ceiling.

This was quite different from Santana's old apartment. That hadn't been small or anything it was just… this was huge! And it looked so exclusive, not to mention the guy in the stupid uniform downstairs and the golden elevator and expensive artwork in the halls.

"You live here?" Carmen questioned astonished and walked past Santana into the breathtaking room. Santana picked up her sister's suitcase and carried it with her inside before closing the door with her foot.

"Isn't it awesome?" Santana chirped and approached her sister again. Carmen just stood with her mouth slightly open.

"Are you hungry?" Santana asked but didn't let Carmen answer. "Would you like a tour?"

Carmen pondered for a second.

"Double yes." She answered after a few seconds, still taken by the gorgeous display.

"Hi, Carmen!" Brittany beamed as she emerged from the living room.

"Hello." Carmen answered with a short tone and without turning to look at the new presence in the room.

"So… how about that tour?" Carmen wondered, addressing only Santana.

"I thought I'd whip up... something, so you don't starve to death on that plane later, and Britts can show you around? Then we can all eat together?" Santana smiled and was happy with the master plan she presented to the group. Carmen sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Whatever." She turned and walked into a different room on her own. Santana and Brittany looked at each other with confused eyes for a while.

"She hates me." Brittany whispered to Santana and looked a little hurt, remembering how amazing her first and only other encounter with other Lopezes had been.

"No, she doesn't." Santana said but hesitated. "I don't think…" She hadn't seen this coming. Maybe she should have spent more time on skype... Santana felt the need to hug Brittany tightly before letting her join Carmen in the other room.

"Personally, I love you." She whispered, earning a smile from Brittany, before disappearing into the kitchen.

"I see you found the living room." Brittany chirped when she saw Carmen eyeing the photo of the two sisters on the mantel piece. Carmen turned her head.

"You two are really cute in that picture." Brittany tried when Carmen didn't answer.

"Santana and I aren't cute. We're hot." Carmen wanted to make clear and shrugged like it was obvious.

"And you certainly are alike." Brittany mumbled.

"Right! Follow me!" Brittany tried her best to be chipper but Carmen's treatment of her was definitely getting to her. She led the girl to room after room and without thinking about it; she shared a story about each room, most of them including Santana.

"And this is the master bathroom" Brittany explained. Carmen didn't think there was anything interesting about this one either, just like the other two bathrooms hadn't been interesting.

"This is actually where I first asked Santana to move in with me…" Even if that particular time hadn't been the most perfect Brittany's heart warmed. Walking through the place like this made her realize how many memories she and Santana already shared.

"Britt?" Carmen asked, now looking serious rather than bored.

"Yeah?" Brittany raised an eyebrow in interest.

"What's your game here?" Carmen asked tetchily.

"Do you mean like monopoly?"

"No…"

"We have a really cool chess table in glass. It looks like ice… sometimes I lick it…" Brittany shook her head to bring herself back from her lost train of thought. Carmen was getting noticeably irritated.

"I was thinking more like – what do you think you're doing with my sister?" Carmen said spitefully and raised her eyebrows like there wasn't a single answer in the world that could be good enough.

"I love her very much." Brittany said matter of factly.

"Yeah? Guess what? So do I! But unlike you I've never broken her heart."

"Oh. I never meant for-"

"I don't care! You need to-"

"Carmen, it wasn't-"

"However it was, you hurt-"

"But I never-"

"Stop interrupting me! In fact – do not even think about talking for the next thirty seconds, okay? Nod so I know you understand me." Carmen tilted her head and waited for Brittany to nod.

"Good. Here's the deal, Goldilocks. You're in love with my sis Tana. I understand. She's beautiful, she's awesome. She's everything you could ever wish her to be. Do you agree? Nod."

Brittany nodded again.

"Good. Also she thinks she's found a soul mate in you, but I know the damage you can really do. But since Santana is madly in love with you I'm not gonna explode you. Here's what's gonna go down. If my sister ever has to hurt over you again imma learn you two things. One, how to operate a chainsaw because it'll be in your ass. And two, how to survive the wrath of Hades since you'll be dead." Carmen's eyes were wide.

She hadn't meant to go off like that. She didn't really dislike Brittany, Santana had told her how it all went down, she just had to make sure Santana was safe. She had to protect her sister. Carmen felt the depth of her breaths and a light tremble in her hands.

Brittany's blue eyes were equally wide and she pursed her lips while trying to think of something to say. The staring grew uncomfortably long and the silence echoed against the walls.

"Carmen?" Brittany said softly. Carmen looked up at Brittany but didn't answer.

"I'm sorry I hurt your sister." Brittany almost whispered and Carmen's face softened. That was all she needed. She relaxed slightly and nodded.

"I forgive you." Carmen answered and approached Brittany hesitantly. Brittany wasn't sure if the cheerleader had meant to come closer or if she just wanted to walk past her but she opened her arms to offer a hug. Carmen walked right up to her and the two hugged with sincerity for about two seconds before pulling apart again. Brittany smiled in relief.

"Here you guys are. Come on, food's ready!" Santana chirped, peeking her head in the door and motioning for them to follow her. She immediately sensed that something was different between the two. Where did the smiles come from?

…

"Mm, Santana, I miss your cooking! Mom's food is shit."

"Carmen?" Santana exclaimed.

"Deny it." Carmen smirked triumphantly. Santana filled her mouth with a fork full of food instead of answering.

"How was cheer camp? Brittany asked, her attention obviously directed at Carmen.

"Easy." Carmen shrugged casually.

"Getting cocky, are we?" Santana asked with her eyebrow raised. "You shouldn't let it go to your head."

"Right, you won Nationals this year." Brittany reminded herself out loud.

"How was that?" Brittany asked. She was curious about Carmen and cheerleading. She thought about becoming a cheer leader several times but she was always busy with dancing and motor cross practice and then she was elected senior class president, and all that plus homework didn't leave her with much time.

"Feels pretty good." Carmen nodded. "Right, San?"

"Wait, you've won cheer Nationals?" Brittany asked, looking straight at Santana with wide eyes.

"Once or twice." Santana answered but could only keep the smug face for a second before breaking into a dorky smile. High school felt like a lifetime ago.

"How do I not know this?" Brittany asked. Santana shrugged.

"I preferred Glee club." Santana said casually. Brittany almost choked on her food. She didn't know Santana was in Glee club either, but when she thought about it, it seemed perfect.

"I could see you in Glee club." Brittany beamed and earned raised eyebrows from Santana, demanding an explanation.

"You always sing when you cook." Brittany stated and thought of all the times she had eavesdropped on Santana's beautiful singing. Brittany smiled amorously and Santana blushed. "I love it." Brittany added and continued to stare at Santana.

"Urgh, get a room!" Carmen muttered and rolled her eyes at the ridiculously adorable couple.

"Are you gonna run for prom queen?" Santana asked and turned her attention to Carmen.

"Oh prom, speaking of getting a room..." Carmen joked and Brittany giggled but Santana was not amused.

"Whuh? Do you mean…? Carmen, you're not gonna have sex, are you?" Santana felt a rush of protectiveness run through her. Why was her baby sister growing up so fast?

"Didn't you have sex when you were 17?" Carmen asked casually, like it was as natural as eating or sleeping.

"I, uhm, well… Carmen?" Santana didn't know how to respond. She was already very much sexually active when she was 17 and she knew Carmen knew that.

"I'm not a slut or anything." Carmen defended and sounded offended.

"There's one guy! Sam. He's a little dorky but really hot… I think the blonde preference runs in the family." Carmen started carefully but ended with a playful wink in Brittany's direction. Santana was just sitting there with her mouth slightly open.

"Well… be safe." Brittany said to Carmen like she was a nurse or something, and the two laughed all the while Santana just continued to stare.

…

"Come on! You're gonna miss your flight. Turtle von Sloth-legs." Santana said to a disoriented Carmen.

"One more thing!" Carmen said and took down the picture from the mantel piece. "I don't like this picture."

"What? You love that picture." Santana argued.

"Something is missing." Carmen said mysteriously. "Brittany, come here!" She called to the other room from which Brittany emerged; sporting a look of confusion.

Both Brittany and Santana looked even more confused when they were pushed to sit down on the couch. Carmen put a camera on the mantelpiece and hurried to cram herself in between the two.

"Smile." She said brightly and then a flash lit the room. Carmen bounced up again and demonstratively put the camera in the frame, now lying down on the table.

"All set."

When Santana returned she had been quick to load the photo into the computer and print it in Brittany's fancy photo printer. She took the old picture out and replaced it with the new one before putting it back on the mantel piece again. The frame didn't really fit in with the rest of the interior so it stood out somewhat from everything else. It gave the room a personal charm.

Santana now found her girlfriend standing in front of the fireplace, eying the picture. She didn't think Brittany looked particularly sad but she had glassy eyes.

"What's wrong?" Santana asked gingerly and approached Brittany with fast steps. Brittany hadn't even noticed Santana's presence until she spoke up and now Brittany was quick to blink her tears away.

"Don't you like the picture?" Santana asked.

"I love the picture." Brittany beamed genuinely and smiled with her whole face. A little wrinkle played between her brows as she thought the words and before she knew it they bubbled out of her.

"I haven't had a family in a really long time." She added gently and Santana's hand comfortingly hugged her cheek at the statement.

"_What's mine is yours."_Santana said gingerly. The two stood there, smiling, for a while until something else stirred up in Brittany's mind.

"San, how come I didn't know that stuff about you? How come you don't talk about high school and stuff?" Brittany asked quietly.

"It was a long time ago, Britt." Santana shrugged and created more space between them.

"Yeah, but those are awesome things I wanna know about you." Brittany said lovingly and closed in on the distance again.

"I don't know. Don't get me wrong, I loved the Cheerios and I loved Glee club…I guess I don't feel like I was me back then, that's all." Santana shrugged again, she hadn't deliberately kept anything from Brittany, it just hadn't come to mind.

"How so?" Brittany asked and Santana pondered for a while with furrowed eyebrows.

"I was mean to people for no reason. I was insecure…" Santana's face morphed back into a breezy smile. "I had sex with guys, for God's sake." She joked and eased the serious mood.

"So then who are you?" Brittany said lightly, not really sure what response she would get.

"I am Santana – proud sister, lousy café worker, sings-when-she-cooks – Lopez. And madly in love with Brittany Pierce." Santana kissed Brittany gingerly.

"Lovely girl, have you met her?" She added as a joke.

"No, I don't think I have. Tell her hello from me, will you?" Brittany kidded back and started walking away. Santana rolled her eyes and happily chased after Brittany. She stopped her with a pull on her arm, turning Brittany around again.

Feeling like she could burst with joy Santana lifted Brittany off the floor, hoisting her to straddle Santana's waist and lock her legs in the small of her back.

"How about that gift?" Santana smirked seductively and carried Brittany in the direction of the bedroom. Even focusing on walking was hard since Brittany was already kissing away at Santana's neck.

Santana put Brittany down on the bed and they both discarded of their own clothes quickly. Despite having the disadvantage of sitting down, Brittany was faster and scooted further in on the bed before Santana joined and straddled her.

With a firm grip around the back of Brittany's neck and the other hand eagerly fondling a breast Santana soon had Brittany's back against the mattress. Santana arched her back to maximum as Brittany's hands toyed around the curve of it, loving how flexible Santana's spine could be.

With clingy hands and desperate groans they pressed closer against each other, breasts crushing together and stomachs touching.

"_What do you want?_" Santana whispered huskily in Brittany's ear, her breath moistening the area and a few hairs sticking to her lips. She proceeded to suck on Brittany's earlobe and tickle her neck with her tongue as she waited for the answer.

"_I want you to ride me_." Brittany answered hoarsely when she could pull together enough concentration to speak. Santana smiled seductively against Brittany's skin and nodded slightly to let Brittany know she would get her wish.

Santana's lips travelled past Brittany's collarbone to suck on a taut nipple. Moving her head lower and keeping her core in the same place made Santana's upper body stop arching and curve slightly the other way, which created space between the two stomachs.

Brittany felt the lack of contact and took full advantage of it, slipping an arm between their bodies and her hand soon found Santana's center. Santana continued tending to Brittany's perky chest for a while but when she felt Brittany's fingers slide deep inside her; she slowly raised her upper body up to sit straddling over Brittany.

Brittany kept her fingers still inside Santana and let Santana choose the pace as she started rocking her hips.

Brittany watched intently as her digits soaked and effortlessly slid inside Santana's drooping sex, then appeared, only to be buried deep in Santana once again. The sight alone had Brittany drooling with desire and the pressure it applied to her own clit when Santana ground down on her fingers made it even harder to control her panting.

Santana's hands had rested on Brittany's stomach but now they began to move, trailing up her own thighs, leaving scratch marks as they went. She grazed her fingers against the dark skin on her stomach before reaching her voluptuous bosom. She took her plump breasts, the weight of them filling her hands, and toyed with them. She stroked over them, pressed them together and played with her nipples.

Brittany watched every movement and forgot to breathe at how magnetically sexy it was. When she knew how again, Brittany urgently drew in a breath of air and moaned it out as Santana pressed her pelvis down harder.

Santana bit her lip and let out a long moan as she made a couple of extra slow, exaggerated grindings, taking in Brittany's fingers as far as they could reach before picking up the pace.

Santana's hands moved even higher and she played with her hair, lifting it from her shoulders and letting it swirl around her face. Santana also became much louder as the higher speed of her movements had her rapidly closing in on an orgasm.

"Ooh God, Brittany!" She squealed with her head being thrown furiously from side to side. Her rocking became even more needful and one hand searched for Brittany's free one to interlock fingers.

"Britt. I'm gonna – I'm gonna – I'm go-oooouuh" Santana's voice faded to a desperate moan.

In the moment of Santana's climax Brittany shot her upper body up, the motion causing her fingers to hit just the right spot and her palm to press harder against Santana's clit, intensifying the already powerful orgasm.

With her hand pulling free of Santana's hand, Brittany wrapped her arm around Santana and caught her in an embrace as her body came undone and twitched in aftershock. Santana breathed heavily over Brittany's shoulder and Brittany lazily pressed her lips against Santana's skin to help her calm down.

"Britt, that was amazing." Santana said lazily and forced herself to shift her body so she could kiss Brittany's lips.

"Are you sure that was a gift for you?" She joked and slammed her limp body against the mattress. Brittany looked at her satisfied girlfriend. Not only had Brittany just gotten the hottest show ever seen on earth but she had _that_smile staring back at her.

"Oh, yeah. That was for me."

* * *

><p><em>Again with the sexy times, I know. I think we might have boarded some sort of a smut train. I didn't plan it that way but the upcoming like three chapters also have it so yeah… maybe I need to get laid...<em>


	21. Chapter 21

I'm sorry for the lateness of this update, I'm usually on time but I'm off by a couple of hours now. I knew I was going to be busy today so I was planning to update before the busy came around and then I got busy sooner than I thought and I'm sorry!

_I taped it to my underboob.._

So I have a question for ya'll. The ladies are living together now and I'm pretty sure I'd lose your interest pretty darn quick if we did a day by day fic so it's gonna be jumping through time a little here and there, a week here, a month there, you know.. I always hint at it**in** the chapters but do you also want me start writing specific dates to make it easier to know where we're at, or is that just irritating? This chapter does it, but future ones only do it if you want it!

**CHAPTER 21**

"**Fifth day's a charm"**

**October 5th**

"_Oh fuck, mmmh, babe?_" Santana don't know why she picked this moment of all moments, but there was something soothing about Brittany's panting breath in her ear. Brittany's hand didn't stop moving between Santana's legs but she lifted her head slightly. Santana's thumb flicking over Brittany's clit however, soon had her forgetting why she did that and before speaking she kissed open-mouthed over Santana's neck and color bone.

"_Uh-huh, yeah, uuuh, what is it San?_" She breathed between kisses.

"You know how I, _huuuhm ah,_ hate working at the…- _oh fuuuuuck_, don't stop!" Santana's eager hand on Brittany's butt pressed her closer, while the other increased speed where it was pumping in and out of Brittany, indicating Santana's growing need. She barely remembered how to speak but she didn't lose her train of thought.

"_Guh_… at the café?" She continued with a deep thrust inside.

"Oh God yes! Uh, yes." Brittany was answering the question but in her sexual heat she couldn't find the appropriate tone and it came out almost like a scream.

"And how I like, _ahuurgg just like that_, how I like to cook?" Santana's 'cook' was dragged out as the tingle in her lower abdomen took over and her body trembled against Brittany and the jerky motions had Brittany tumbling over the edge too.

"_Mmmmh, baby. So guuaaaaah_." Brittany moaned. In her orgasm Santana forced her fingers deeper and she bucked her own hips forcing Brittany's fingers to dig deeper too.

Santana's tense body stopped moving but Brittany continued to rock slowly against Santana's hand for little while longer to help herself come down. Both girls had a thin layer of sweat covering their bodies and Brittany even had a drop of it playing around her temple. The strain of having sex all day had her body feeling a little numb and after pulling out she sunk her tired body down on Santana who smiled at the weight resting on her.

Santana moved her wide spread legs to feel Brittany against her skin and cuddle the two closer. With the hand that hadn't been inside Brittany just moments ago she lazily stroked Brittany's hair and it had her, with some effort, roll off Santana and lie next her instead so they could look at each other.

"I've been thinking about it for a while now and… I wanna open my own restaurant." Santana said with sparkling eyes. Brittany didn't have enough energy to lift her head off the pillow but she gave Santana a big smile.

"That's amazing!" Brittany chirped as her eye lids got heavier.

"Yeah. I'm thinking maybe taking a cooking course or something just to on the safe side but I wanna do it at soon as possible." Santana continued to explain and Brittany nodded through a proud smile. It made so much sense, it was like the most natural thing in the world for Santana to be a chef and Brittany was one hundred per cent behind her girlfriend on this.

"You're amazing." Brittany murmured into the pillow, sounding even more tired. "You're so amazing." Brittany repeated and those were her final words before she dozed off mid-day.

Santana wrapped her arm around adorable Brittany, she was too excited to sleep but too comfortable to get up.

* * *

><p><strong>November 5th<strong>

* * *

><p>"Are you surprised?" Santana asked when she got a minute alone with Brittany.<p>

"I am actually." Brittany beamed. "How did you put this all together?"

"I'm awesome." Santana said casually and shrugged her shoulders.

"C'mere." Brittany said and pulled Santana closer, pressing her lips against Santana but not really capable of holding back her smile at the moment. Santana closed her eyes in the kiss but was the first to pull away from it, because she just needed to look at Brittany again.

"Happy birthday, Britt." Santana said amorously when she found Brittany's pools of blue.

"Here you guys are! Stop being so adorable, we want to cut the cake." Quinn said, appearing in the door holding a cake slicer.

"We were just… -" Santana started.

"Are you taking all the credit for the surprise party?" Quinn asked jokingly.

"Well, it was my idea." Santana said and raised her eyebrows, playfully challenging Quinn.

"Well, I did all the… and the…" Quinn tried but at the moment couldn't think of anything that hadn't been taken care of by Santana.

"…I helped." She pouted and looked down. Seeing the cake slicer in her hand she remembered why she had come here in the first place.

"Come on, people are waiting!" Quinn cheered up again since she hadn't actually been upset in the first place and grabbed Brittany by the wrist. All three walked to the festively decorated dining room where all their friends were waiting.

There were balloons everywhere, on the floor, in the ceiling, on the walls and hanging off pretty much every piece of furniture and the room had never been more colourful. Everyone had had a lot of fun throwing confetti at Brittany when she, unknowing of what was happening, walked into the apartment so the floor was covered in it. Most had silly string on their clothes and in their hair and everyone was enjoying themselves, drink in hand.

A rush of delight went through the room when Brittany came into it again.

"Yay, birthday girl!" Rachel called out in an attempt to steal a few seconds of attention. She was also a little drunk already since she wasn't very used to alcohol and it was an open bar.

"Who wants cake?" Quinn - by the way also a little drunk - called out and earned cheerful roars from everyone. She handed the slicer to Brittany so she could do the honours of cutting the first piece after she had blown the candles out.

"Make a wish." Santana said and smiled as Brittany leaned forward to empty her lungs over the flickering lights. The cake was pretty huge so it took her a full four puffs to blow out the horns of twenty-four pink unicorns galloping on a squarish cake covered in a layer of green marzipan. When she got the last one people clapped and hollered.

"Okay, okay, who wants the first piece?" Brittany asked and her eyes swept over the circle of friends. A lot of people waved their hands in hopes to get picked but Brittany's eyes landed on Emma. She was only five months and still very small but there was a little mound to be hinted under her shirt.

"You're eating for two and I want the baby to be all fat when he comes out." Brittany explained and handed Emma the first piece. In her mind Emma wondered if the slicer had been sterilized recently but she decided to push those thoughts away. For some reason the importance of those things had started to _ever so slowly_ fade away. Brittany enjoyed being cake master and cut pieces for everyone who came up and wanted one.

"Hey, look at that, you got the _'Hap'._I'm gonna give Rachel the _'py'_ because you're_so happy_together." Brittany beamed at Quinn and referred to the frosting letters on the cake spelling out 'Happy Birthday, Brittany'. There was also a heart in frosting and Brittany split it in half and gave one piece to Santana and kept one piece herself before finally putting down the slicer to sit and eat with her girlfriend.

"What'dya wish for?" Santana asked alluringly.

"If I tell you it won't come true..." Brittany answered with a mysterious smile.

…

"Alright, good night you guys! Drive safe!" Brittany said loudly to the last group of friends leaving at around two in the morning. She turned around.

"You two are _not_ driving! Come with me!" She led a very drunk Quinn and an even drunker Rachel through the hallway to the guest room. She tucked them both in and gave each of her friends a kiss on the forehead before going to search for Santana, who she found doing dishes in the kitchen.

"Babe?" Brittany whined at the fact that Santana was doing chores and pulled her away from the sink.

"Do you know how awesome you are?" Brittany tried to not slur but she was also a little bit intoxicated.

"This was the best birthday _ever!_" Brittany hoisted herself up on the counter. She reached out and pulled Santana in between her legs, locking her arms behind Santana's back. Santana smiled lovingly at all the cuteness that was drunk Brittany.

"And the cake, I can't believe you made that, it was so delicious and all our friends were here and everything was so perfect." Brittany said, her lips moving closer to Santana's as she spoke and she ended up pressing against them when she finished her rant. Santana smiled. She had had a lot of more ideas that she hadn't been able to go through with, like getting a jumping castle, so she was happy that Brittany was pleased.

"You're sexy." Brittany suddenly said and furrowed her eyebrows as if concentrated as she tried to find the hem of Santana's shirt.

"I want you in the birthday room." Brittany said and tried to be seductive but Santana just thought she looked adorable.

"Birthday room?" Santana furrowed her eyebrows since she didn't know which room this was.

"You made it so pretty with the balloons and the confetti. I wish it could look like that all the time…" Brittany began but then her mind started strolling off and she changed her mind.

"…but if it's special all the time then… it's not special." She said and looked deep lost in her thoughts.

"You're special all the time." Santana said gingerly and kissed Brittany lips. Brittany caught Santana's lip between hers and sucked it into her mouth before she could attempt to pull away.

"Birthday room." Brittany repeated in a mumble and let her hands go wherever they wanted, which was pretty much all over.

"I thought we had guests?" Santana argued even though her hands were getting a little frisky as well.

"Birthday room." Brittany wailed and tugged her own shirt off, revealing toned abs and prefect breasts in a purple lace bra. Santana eyed her girlfriend for a moment before grabbing Brittany, sliding her off the counter and onto her hips before carrying her to the dining room.

Santana eagerly cleared the table by sweeping her arm over it, knocking down glasses and throwing paper plates on the floor. She hungrily put Brittany down on the wooden board. Brittany laid her back down and Santana shifted her hold to the hips as Brittany arched her back, pressing her sex against Santana. Feeling the pressure Brittany squealed with joy to have her birthday wish come true.

* * *

><p><strong>December 5th<strong>

* * *

><p>Santana was sitting on the couch and her laptop was humming and warming her thighs in her lap. She was in the midst of booking a flight. She could drive but it takes a while and flying is so much faster and more comfortable. Plus she doesn't actually own a car... Whether to drive or fly was however not what had her hesitating.<p>

She was wondering whether to book one or two tickets. She always went home to Ohio for Christmas and New Years and this year wouldn't be different. She had already spoken to her parents and they were so excited.

Santana just… hadn't told Brittany yet - which meant she hadn't asked if she wanted to come, even though Santana really wanted her to. They went to Emma and Puck for Thanksgiving so there had been no talk about where to spend the Holidays. Brittany hadn't mentioned any plans but maybe she had some yearly tradition? Santana didn't want to step in between.

"Hey babe, what you doin?" Brittany chirped as she skipped into the room, sporting a bra and a pair of Santana's sweat pants. Santana's eyes shot up from the computer. Great, now she could ask.

"Britt...?" Santana started but was distracted by the emerged gorgeousness.

"What do you want for dinner today? I'm starving." Brittany interrupted and thrummed her hands on her stomach. Santana giggled.

"I don't know… whatever you want, B." Santana said and put her computer on the table before motioning for Brittany to come join her of the couch. Brittany grinned and jumped on it, tumbled and fell over Santana. They cuddled for a while before straightening themselves up again.

"I want to eat at your restaurant." Brittany said and smiled proudly at the fact Santana had already made things start to happen in that department.

"Well, you might wanna have a meal or two before that since it doesn't open for another three months." Santana chuckled.

She had found a nice place for it, not too big and not too small and it was currently under reconstruction because it hadn't been a restaurant before so it didn't have a kitchen or anything. Santana still hadn't thought of name for it though. She wanted something awesome and suddenly everything she came up with was so lame.

Santana was shaken from her thoughts when she saw Brittany staring at the screen.

"Are you going somewhere?" Brittany asked in a low voice and sounded a little sad that she apparently wasn't invited.

"I'm going to Ohio… for Christmas and stuff." Santana answered hesitantly.

"Oh." Brittany said and all the playfulness that had been bubbling inside her moments ago was gone. She stood up.

"Actually, I'm not that hungry." She said and walked out of the room.

"Britt!" Santana called after her but she didn't get an answer. Okay, so maybe not talking to Brittany about it was a huge mistake. Especially now that she seemed to think Santana didn't want her there when in reality she wanted it too much.

Santana sighed at her own stupidity as she got up to chase after Brittany. Then she turned back and booked_two_ tickets. She had already filled in everything so it finished with just one click. Then she rushed to her feet again. She saw the door to the bedroom closed. She tried to walk in but it was locked so she banged on it.

"Britt, let me in." Santana said through the door but nothing happened. "B, come on!" Santana tried again and knocked a couple of more times but with no luck.

"I was afraid to ask because I didn't know if you wanted to or if you had plans or…-" Santana was talking to the door and was startled, to say the least, when the door suddenly flung open and she was presented with a teary eyed Brittany.

"Yeah, Santana. I have such jolly merry plans with_my_ family. Oh no wait - I don't have a family." Brittany's angry voice didn't match the hurt look on her face but Santana felt like shit for being the reason for both.

"I'm sorry-"

"I thought you said your family was my family?" Brittany almost whispered, looking down at the floor.

"And I meant it!" Santana grunted desperately. Brittany's sad eyes rose and she tilted her head as if to say _well you sure as hell didn't show it._

"Brittany, please come with me to Ohio?" Santana asked in a pleading voice.

"I don't wanna come now." Brittany said. She knew she was being childish but… whatever.

"Please?" Santana begged again.

"No." Brittany said in a short tone and crossed her arms over her chest. It was quiet for a while and then Santana crossed her arms too.

"Fine. Don't come. I'll just give your ticket to… a hedgehog." Santana couldn't think of anything but she saw the hedgehogs on Brittany's socks and drew her inspiration from there. She wasn't actually angry but she still turned around and started to walk away. Brittany tilted her head to the other side.

"Wait! You have a ticket for me?" She asked and followed Santana until she stopped.

"Of course I have a ticket for you! … But since you don't want it…" Santana said and shrugged. Brittany's face lit up.

"No, I want it!" Brittany beamed.

"You said you didn't." Santana argued and shrugged again like there was nothing she could do. Now she was really just teasing.

"Please, can I have the ticket?" Brittany pouted. Santana gritted her teeth in a hesitant manner.

"I don't know… you might have to bribe someone…" Santana said and smirked. Brittany's face changed and she raised her eyebrows seductively.

"Is that so? Could you refer me to whom please?" Brittany asked and took a few steps closer.

"Well, I know someone… but she doesn't do cash. Any favours from her will have to be taken out in trade." Santana said, her voice becoming somewhat husky. Brittany was now dangerously close and she wrapped her arms around Santana.

"That's not a problem for me." Brittany answered hoarsely and dipped Santana, holding her there as she moved her lips closer.

"Ms. Pierce! What will your girlfriend say?" Santana joked.

"Oh, she'll never find out." Brittany said and kissed Santana passionately.


	22. Chapter 22

Specific dates it is! Cool. Can I also just say how happy you all make me! Whether it's here on on tumblr you're incredible! Thank you!

_When life hands you lemons - make lemonade. When life hands you Naya Rivera - kiss her. Over and over and over again. Well done, Hemo! _

**CHAPTER 22**

**"The Lopez Family"**

* * *

><p><strong>December 24th<strong>

* * *

><p>"We'll be down in a minute!" Santana called down the stairs and then directed Brittany to her room.<p>

"Oh wow, you're room is like a bachelor pad." Brittany said, when presented with Santana's childhood room. She put her suitcase down and looked at the dark walls and interior. Santana had a big bed with black satin sheets and a colourful rasta painting hanging over it. Also on the wall was a hat and on the floor rested a zebra rug.

"I was quite the bachelor." Santana joked and chuckled. It was kind of true but also not true at all. Brittany walked into the room and sat down on the bed.

"The things that must have happened here, huh?" The blonde said playfully while bobbing up and down on the mattress.

"Oh yeah, you have no idea." Santana joked again.

"Like what?" Brittany asked curiously which caught Santana off guard. She thought they were just playing around. She looked at the bed and a not so welcome flash of another blonde plopped into her head.

"I actually lost my virginity in that bed." Santana said and lifted her suitcase up and put it down on a chair. She didn't know why she would want it there, but she felt like she wanted to keep her hands busy.

"I'm intrigued. To whom?" Brittany asked with more curiosity.

"Uhm, Holly." Santana answered and tried to act casual. She hoped Brittany would just drop it. Santana was happy; she didn't want to start thinking about her past. Brittany looked a little surprised.

"Really? Wow…" The blonde uttered and seemed a little lost in her thoughts.

"What?" Santana asked with a shake of her head.

"I don't know… I've heard so many stories about guys you dated when you were younger, I guess I always assumed you did it with a guy first." Brittany shrugged casually.

"Oh… well, I didn't." Santana answered. "I was drunk out of my mind, though. Why, what about you?"

"I almost lost my virginity to a guy once. At camp. He wanted to climb into my tent." Brittany shrugged again. "But I didn't. Guys are just… I just think it's too much alien invasion…"

"Wait, have you never…?" Santana asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Not with a guy." Brittany said and smiled. Santana sported a little frown.

"Then how do you know you're a lesbian?" Santana asked – clearly not thinking straight. Or maybe… thinking a little too straight. Brittany's eyes widened and an almost frightened look morphed into her face.

"Seriously, Santana? Like are you being serious right now?" Brittany asked and sounded angry, which was rare for the blonde. Santana heard the second she said it how stupid it sounded and she wanted to take it back.

"I just…-" Santana wanted to explain herself.

"Straight people don't have to sleep with someone of the same sex to prove they're straight, why should I have to put a penis inside me to prove I'm gay? That makes _no_ sense." Brittany said in the same pissed off tone and now adding a few gestures.

"I'm sorry. Of course you don't have to…- That was really dumb." Santana blurted with wide eyes. She was not at all used to, nor a fan of, angry Brittany. Especially not when she was the reason, and especially not when she had nothing to justify herself with. It took several tense seconds but then Brittany's face softened

"I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to snap at you." Brittany said and sounded softer.

"But you're so right." Santana insisted.

"I know… but I feel like I totally ruined the trip now."

"No, no, no! I shouldn't have said that. It was mean."

"But I shouldn't have told you off like that. I could have been nicer."

"No, I deserved it. I was being an idiot."

"But…-"

"Oh my God! Have you two heard yourselves? I literally want to kill myself." A familiar voice interrupted and startled the arguing couple.

"Hi Carmen!" Brittany chirped.

"How long have you been standing there?" Santana wanted to know with a crooked smile.

"My room is right there… it's not my fault the walls are thin." Carmen said and smiled back at her sister. Carmen chuckled at a memory of her and Santana always talking through the walls after bed time when they were younger. Santana and Brittany looked at Carmen and then at each other as they wondered what the girl was thinking about that made her giggle to herself.

"Anyways, I came to tell you dinner's ready." Carmen said after a moment or two of no one speaking.

* * *

><p>"Mrs. Lopez, could you pass the salad, please?" Brittany asked politely. It was her first dinner with Santana's parents and she didn't want to mess it up. She had never been more nervous in her life. Especially facing Álvaro again. She knew she had let him down and she was dreading his disappointment.<p>

"There you go, dear. And please, call me Gabriela." Santana's mother said and smiled. Brittany hadn't seen this woman not smiling even once. Then again she hadn't seen this woman much at all, but still.

"Santana, do you realize it's been a year since we saw you last?" Santana's father said and tried to sound hurt and offended but his acting had never been very impressive.

"Not for me!" Carmen said smugly and shrugged her shoulders. "Because she loves me more."

Santana playfully stuck her tongue out at her sister before apologizing for her lack of presence lately.

"I know, I'm sorry. New Years resolution – visit more!" Santana stated.

"That reminds me! Are you staying for New Years?" Gabriela interjected.

"Of course. I always do that so why wouldn't we?" Santana asked and took her fork into her mouth, reminding herself to teach her mom a thing or two about cooking.

"Oh well I didn't know, maybe you wanted to spend some time with Brittany's family?" Gabriela said casually, but was delighted to have her daughter and Brittany stay. Santana froze.

"Oh… well…" Santana started to explain. She wasn't sure how Brittany would cope with this topic. Even when it was just the two of them it wasn't her favorite thing to talk about. Santana could tell Brittany really missed her dad and not knowing about her mother was painful for the blonde. Brittany sensed how uncomfortable Santana suddenly was, and loved her even more for caring so much.

"It's okay, San." Brittany assured and dropped her hand under the table to squeeze Santana's thigh. Then she cleared her throat.

"Actually I don't really have… my dad past away a couple of years ago and my mom is… missing." Brittany explained and felt her hand on Santana's thigh being squeezed by Santana. It was a squeeze on a squeeze.

"What about your siblings?" Gabriela wanted to know, still smiling but with compassion and comfort rather than happiness.

"I don't have any." Brittany clarified. She was starting to sense that people were tensing up and that made her feel like she was already messing up this dinner, and her biggest fear hadn't even been confronted yet.

"Oh Lord!" Santana's mother exclaimed with a puff. It was one of the saddest things she had heard. No family? What a tragedy. She shook her head and then proceeded to reach over the table and grab Brittany's hand which was fidgeting with the foot of the wine glass.

Brittany raised her eyes to look at the older woman. She radiated warmth. Her eyes were different from Santana's, Santana had her father's eyes, but they had the same cheek bones and lips, though Gabriela's were not quite as full. Her face was obviously more wrinkled than Santana's but they still shared something… the same glow.

"You're always welcome here, dear." Gabriela said and the firmness of her words shot right into the blonde's heart and Brittany's eyes watered as she gave Gabriela a grateful nod before turning her eyes to Santana.

"Isn't that right, Álvaro?" Gabriela wanted her husband to confirm so she nudged him with her free hand. Brittany froze for a second.

"Oh yes. You're one of us." Álvaro chirped and raised his glass.

"To family!" He exclaimed but didn't give anyone else time to join in the toast before he took a gulp of his glass. Brittany didn't mean to but her eyes shot to him with a bit of shock in her face. Why wasn't he upset with her?

"Brittany, I can't tell you how excited Gabriela and I got when we heard about your moving in together. And Carmen told us about the place. We're dying to come visit!" Álvaro continued. He was in a suprisingly jolly mood.

"You're always welcome." Brittany said and smiled. She tried to snap out of it but she was still stumped.

"How long have you two been together now? Must be over a year and a half?" Álvaro wanted to know after finishing his glass and putting it down again.

All eyes turned to the couple and Brittany felt Santana's hand tense on hers. A year and a half? What about the…? Brittany finally realized Santana had never told her parents what happened between them that summer.

"Yeah…" Santana started and didn't know what to say exactly. She looked around the table and saw everyone eagerly waiting for the answer.

"Since June 9th of last year I haven't gone one day without Santana on my mind." Brittany suddenly spoke lovingly and earned smiles from everyone around the table. It was the truth even if it left out a lot of information. It wasn't Brittany's place to tell Santana's parents and the looks on their faces meant so much, she didn't want to ruin it.

"But I'd like to celebrate our one year anniversary on April 7th?" Brittany said, having turned her head to look at Santana. Santana furrowed her eyebrows since she didn't understand why. Brittany turned her head back to rest of the family again.

"It's the first time Santana told me she loves me." Brittany explained coyly.

"You remember what day it was?" Santana asked softly, not sure if she should feel bad that she didn't, or feel happy that her girlfriend is the most amazing person in the world.

"I remember everything about that day." Brittany beamed.

"Oh yeah? What socks was she wearing?" Carmen challenged. She was just kidding around but Santana thought it was putting Brittany a little too much on the spot.

"Carmen! She doesn't have to-"

"Pale blue ones, with rainclouds on them." Brittany interrupted. She remembered. Santana looked at Brittany with her jaw slightly dropped. They stared at each other as the family stared at them. It should have been weird but it didn't feel wrong or uncomfortable.

"Brittany!" Álvaro broke the silence and steered Brittany's eyes away from Santana's and into his. He raised his glass again.

"You did good, kid." He said with a proud smile.

…

The rest of the dinner went smoothly. Brittany's nerves eased and everyone had a good time. There was a lot of talking and a lot of laughing. Brittany loved belonging around a full dinner table again. She couldn't wait for Christmas day tomorrow. She knew it would be the best Cristmas in a long time.

Gabriela was the first to stand up from the table. Santana quickly followed and Brittany was eager to help as well. They cleared the table, cleaned up everything and with five people helping it went in no time at all. Álvaro and Gabriela said good night and disappeared into their bedroom. Carmen went upstairs and Santana and Brittany soon followed. They ran into Carmen on her way back from the bathroom to her bedroom.

"Going to bed?" Santana asked but immediately felt stupid for asking. Carmen was in her pyjamas and it was late so it was pretty obvious.

"You should be a rocket scientist." Carmen said and Brittany giggled. Santana just rolled her eyes at the remark.

"Good night." Carmen said and walked to her bedroom. In the door she stopped and turned around.

"But NO funny business! I'm serious! My room is right here." Carmen said and she was not kidding. Santana rolled her eyes again and went into her own bedroom, closing the door behind her and Brittany.

Santana took longer to get ready so Brittany crawled up in the bed before Santana. The sheets smelled just like Santana's bed in her old apartment and like Santana's side in their new bed. The rest of the house had a different smell, it was like a Lopez lollipop of everyone whirled together and it was nice too. But this smell sent Brittany up in the clouds. She took a deep breath of it and held it in her lungs until she was sure it had stuck there a little. She was so grateful to get to smell that smell. For a while she had thought she would never get to do that again.

"San? Why didn't you tell your parents?" Brittany asked cautiously from where she had snuggled up. Santana stopped what she was doing and turned to Brittany.

"I was going to but every time I tried I just couldn't…" Santana sighed.

"I couldn't do that to them again, especially since they loved you so much after meeting you." She explained.

"I… after high school and everything with Holly I was pretty messed up…" Her parents had had a really hard time coping with Santana's last heartbreak and she never mustered up the guts to bring up the new one. It didn't matter now, though.

"I wasn't going to pretend forever but… anyways, things worked out, right?" Santana said and picked up a brush to run it through her hair a couple of times. Brittany nodded.

She was only semi-satisfied with the explanation. Santana's face always changed whenever she mentioned Holly and she closed up pretty fast. Brittany wasn't the jealous type... sometimes she just couldn't help but wonder…? However, hearing that Santana's parents loved her was enough for Brittany to drop it for now, and if she was going to be completely honest she liked not feeling like the black sheep with them.

"Thank you." Brittany said coyly, not sure if it was right to thank someone for withholding the truth.

"For what?" Santana asked while turning the lights off and ridding herself of her tank top and bra, revealing her bare chest.

"For not telling them, and for working things out. For being you. For being with me… The list goes on, you know." Brittany beamed and even though the room was a little darker now Santana could see Brittany's huge grin clearly.

"You're such a dork! I love you." Santana beamed back, standing straight in the middle of the room now sporting nothing but a tiny thong. Brittany felt all giddy inside when she saw it.

"Come to bed already!" Brittany chirped and slung the covers aside; inviting Santana in and showing her that Brittany was also wearing nothing but panties. Santana's smile grew mischievous in kind and just seeing it had Brittany's underwear on the verge of moistening.

As soon as Santana was close enough Brittany reached her arm out and grabbed Santana, which made her fall on top of Brittany. Brittany hugged Santana tight, placing gentle kisses on her naked skin. Brittany was happy following Carmen's orders and not taking it further but Santana had other plans.

"You know what you said earlier…?" Santana spoke against Brittany's neck as she kissed there.

"About you not having been with a man?" Santana clarified, her voice getting raspier and her lips finding Brittany's pulse point. Santana sucked there for a moment before continuing.

"I've been thinking about it all day…" Brittany could tell Santana was getting more aroused by her kisses becoming hungrier but her voice was steady.

"… and I think…" Santana lifted her head to kiss Brittany's lips again but the blonde's mouth was slightly open so Santana took Brittany's bottom lip between her teeth instead. At the same time she pinched a pink nipple and earned a squeal from Brittany. "…it's so fucking hot."

Brittany's breath stuck in her throat as she suffocated a groan, causing a tremble to run through her. Brittany bucked her hips against Santana who let a hand travel south and rub Brittany's sex teasingly on top of the fabric covering her wetness. The dank warmth had Santana's heart going a thousand miles per hour.

"You're so fucking sexy it mak-" Santana's hoarse voice was interrupted by a moan Brittany couldn't hold inside and Santana smirked.

"It makes me _sooo_…" Brittany's head was tilted far back, making it easy for Santana to run her tongue over Brittany's neck and leaving a long mark of saliva.

"…wet." Santana finished with a moan and blew some air on Brittany's licked neck, chilling it and sending a quiver through the blonde.

"_Show meeh_." Brittany panted and captured Santana's lips with her own in a desperate kiss. Santana's hand abandoned Brittany's throbbing sex and instead she dipped into her own underwear, quickly finding her entrance and slipping inside.

She coated her digits thoroughly with her juices and being there felt so damn good she was tempted to just make herself cum right then and there. She fought the urge and brought her fingers up, offering them to Brittany.

The turned on look on Brittany face was priceless as she stuck her tongue out and licked the middle finger slowly. The magnificent taste instantly made her want more and she proceeded to suck on the index finger. She took it in all the way down to the last knuckle and Santana withdrew it in a painfully slow pace, finally releasing it with a plop. Brittany continued cleaning off every last bit of Santana's fingers, desperate to not miss a drop.

"_Fuck, that's hot._" Santana breathed as the sucking and licking noises Brittany's mouth made against her fingers was driving her wild. She suddenly sat up on her knees in the bed and vigorously tugged Brittany's panties down her toned legs. She pulled her own panties down as far as they would go but then dove back down between Brittany's legs and kicked them off the last bit.

"San, your sister is in the other room." Brittany argued although she was milliseconds away from not giving a fuck about that. Clit friction was instantly found as Santana rolled her hips between Brittany's long limbs and Brittany clutched to the mattress so tight her fingers whitened.

"I want you." Santana grunted desperately and as she picked up a rhythm against Brittany's center the blonde couldn't resist. A raspy moan from deep in Santana's throat came out, and it came out louder than intended.

"We need to be – _uuh God!_ – quiet." Brittany squealed but Santana started going faster. Their inner lips spread open and their juices mixed together as they rocked against each other.

Santana chose the pace and worked it until she couldn't last much longer. Then she changed it up, different angle, different speed and went until they had almost reached the destination again. Brittany was close, so so close, when Santana suddenly stopped. Brittany grunted but then remembered she had to be quiet and bucked her hips hard against Santana who smirked and then started again – fast.

_Is she trying to kill me? _Brittany thought, doing her best to stop the pleasured sounds making their way to bubble over. Santana tried kissing Brittany as a way to muffle them but the voracious thrusting her body was currently caught up in made it difficult.

Instead she buried her face in the pillow next to Brittany's head, just in time to drown out a groan. She also grabbed onto the headboard, slamming her hand against it harder than she intended as she felt seconds away from bursting. She felt Brittany's stomach tighten against her own.

This was it, Santana couldn't turn back and tease this time. Brittany didn't know what to do with herself as a scream was building up inside her. She opened her eyes and saw Santana's arm hovering above her and lifted her head to press her mouth against it.

Afraid to bite she sucked on it hard as Santana circled the blonde's clit with her own and with tasting Santana's skin and a hint of the Latina's juices still in her mouth Brittany felt the release throwing itself over her. She wrapped her legs around Santana who pressed her hips down on Brittany as the blonde arched up into Santana and sucked harder on the arm.

"_Fuuuuuuuhk_." Santana breathed with as little voice behind the word as possible when her body twitched in the earth shattering peak. Brittany twitched too and clenched her legs harder around Santana to stifle their shaking and shuddering. When they could muster up the energy, both girls simultaneously started to laugh.

"That. Was not quiet." Santana chuckled and slid off Brittany slightly but with half her body still lying on top of the blonde.

"You're evil." Brittany joked and slapped Santana's back lightly.

"But you love me." Santana smirked.

"I do." Brittany beamed. "You got a mark right there to prove it." Brittany said and pressed her finger against the dark hickey she had made on Santana's arm. Santana's eyes shot down and she saw the anything but subtle mark.

"Oh you little…-" Santana started but was interrupted by a huge grin spreading across Brittany's face.

"It's after midnight." Brittany said and radiated joy. Santana turned her head to look at the clock on the nightstand.

"Well, look at that…"

"Merry Christmas, San." Brittany smiled and kissed Santana's lips.

"Merry Christmas, Britt."


	23. Chapter 23

Well hello! And may I say that you are looking lovely this evening! Oh thank you very much! (That was me assuming the compliment was returned.) Lol, jk, I just love Miranda, don't you?

I'd like to say that I love all of your reviews! And I love those of you who write to me on tumblr too. I know I don't have a fancy blog but i think you should have a look at it. Because it's SUCH FUN! I'm stalpankaka on there too so no confusion. ANYWHO - on with the chapter!

**CHAPTER 23**

**"The Holliday aint over"**

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><p><strong>December 30th<strong>

* * *

><p>"Like for real. If you guys get it on one more night in a row I'm moving out!" Carmen said over the table, addressing both Santana and Brittany and looked firmly from one pair of brown eyes to the other pair of blue.<p>

She had made herself clear before but Santana didn't seem to listen at all and Carmen was getting tired of having to sleep with her ipod blasting in her ears to drown out the couple in the next room.

"Carmen! Mom can hear you!" Santana hissed and looked over to the stove where her mother was wiping it clean after cooking lunch. Gabriela turned around and started walking towards them.

"That's not all she can hear, Santana dear." She said with a smirk.

"We might have to put you two in separate rooms." She continued, putting one hand on Santana's shoulder and giving her that same look she had always gotten when she came home drunk to her mother waiting in the kitchen. _Busted_. Santana's eyes widened.

"Oh God." Santana squealed. She wanted to die. She had no idea they were being _that _loud. Brittany's whole face turned red. She wanted to just sink trough the floor. This was so embarrassing!

She looked down at the table, careful not to lift her gaze and careful not to join in the conversation. Gabriela saw it and it was positively one of the cutest things she had seen, but she didn't want Brittany to feel uncomfortable in their home.

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about, dear." Gabriela said and moved her hand from Santana's shoulder to stroke encouragingly over Brittany's back.

"I remember when Álvaro and I were young…" She continued, drawing a breath of pure happiness and looking at the ceiling like it was playing a movie of memories.

"Okay! Gross! Tuning out, I'm tuning out now!" Carmen said loudly while getting off her chair and leaving the kitchen.

"Well, on the bright side mom, we leave in three days." Santana said first looking up at her mother and then turned her head to Brittany.

"Do you think we can keep it in our pants that long?" She asked her girlfriend who, encouraged by Gabriela, didn't feel so embarrassed anymore. Brittany shrugged her shoulders like she didn't know.

"We could always try." She joked.

She had absolutely no intension of disturbing the rest of the Lopez family anymore but she still felt that it would be a challenge. Sure, they had gone three days without sleeping together before but not when any of those three nights were spent in the same house, in the same bed. Who can lie next to Santana and not do things with her? It's like holding one of those four-colored ink pens and not clicking them. It's impossible.

"You two…" Gabriela said lovingly. She smacked her gums and shook her head as if to tell Santana and Brittany that they were hopeless. Then she snapped her fingers and walked over to the counter, retrieving a piece of paper and handing it to Santana.

"I almost forgot… I need you two to do the grocery shopping for tomorrow's party." She explained. Santana read the note and nodded her head.

"We got this." She smirked and put the note in her pocket.

"Great! It's gonna be a good New Year's Eve this year." Gabriela beamed, mostly at Brittany. Then she leaned in closer.

"Carmen's boyfriend is coming." She whispered and then put her finger over her lips like it was a secret. Brittany mouthed a big 'oh' and her eyes sparkled a little with excitement. Carmen tried to play it cool but she could not stop talking about this Sam guy.

"Stop talking about me!" Carmen hollered from the living room.

"I thought you tuned out, sweetheart?" Gabriela called back with a chuckle.

* * *

><p>Santana drove the car. It was a nice change. In New York she didn't have one, and whenever they went places together, Brittany almost always drove. If they were both going to different places that wasn't a problem either because she could just borrow one of Brittany's cars but when the blonde had tried to give Santana a car she refused to accept it.<p>

She wanted to buy her first car with money she had made herself. So she could feel like she had worked for it. Brittany understood of course because she's just such an understanding, loving person.

"And that's Emma's parents' house." Santana said and pointed out the window to a big house. It stood out quite a lot from the rest on the street. It was bright red while the others were white or at least some other light color.

They were taking a longer drive to the store so that Brittany could see more of the town. They hadn't really gotten out much in the days they spent here because it was so cold outside and the fireplace was just so cosy. But time was running out and Brittany wanted to see where Santana grew up.

On the opposite side of Emma's house something caught Brittany's eye.

"That's a really cool playground." Brittany pointed out and looked through the widow, following it with her eyes until she had twirled her whole body around and was looking through the rear window.

"Never played on it." Santana shrugged.

"Why?" Brittany breathed and sounded almost horrified. Santana had to laugh a little. Brittany was being serious.

"Because I'm too cool." Santana joked and Brittany giggled.

"So what did you do?" Brittany asked, still in shock. Playgrounds were the best!

"I baked sand cookies and Emma refused to eat them." Santana chuckled.

"And we pretended to be spies and snuck around in places we weren't supposed to be. We got really good at it! We caught my teacher smoking weed once. Ah, the leverage." Santana spoke with sparkling eyes. Despite Emma being four years older they had a lot of fun growing up together.

"That sounds like a lot of fun." Brittany said with a smile.

"What did you do?" Santana asked with curiosity.

"I had a playground like that in my backyard that I loved to play on. And I played with my ponies…-"

"Actual ponies?" Santana interrupted questioningly.

"Yeah…"

"Just making sure." Santana said with a crooked smile and motioned for Brittany to continue.

"I had a playroom stuffed with toys but my favorites were Barbies. And my bike, I loved my bike." Brittany said.

"I bet you were adorable with a little helmet on." Santana beamed and turned her head momentarily to look at Brittany.

"That's my high school!" Santana exclaimed when they could see it coming up down the road.

"Yup, good old McKinley High." She added and nodded slowly.

"Pull in!" Brittany beamed and motioned her hands like she was turning an invisible steering wheel in front of her.

"It's closed over Christmas break..." Santana said hesitantly but did as Brittany asked and parked the car in the lot.

"Come on!" Brittany said, unbuckling her seat belt and getting out of the car. Santana had no idea what was going on but she followed. The cold air outside hit her in the face and she shuddered. But having to run after the fast blonde warmed her up a little.

"B, where are you going? I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to be here." Santana called after Brittany in a worried tone.

"I thought you liked sneaking around in places you're not supposed to be." Brittany called over her shoulder to her slower girlfriend. They made it further and further in on school grounds. Suddenly after turning a corner Santana couldn't see Brittany anywhere.

"Britt?" She asked into the air, but was afraid to say it too loudly just in case someone else could hear.

"In here." Brittany said and stuck her head out of a window. Santana turned around.

"Did you break into the school?" Santana asked with raised eyebrows and looked around like it was a huge setup, and a S.W.A.T team would storm in any second and arrest them.

"No, it was open." Brittany shrugged. Someone had probably missed it since it had been open just a tiny crack. Brittany was the one who had opened it so much she could climb inside.

"You coming or what?" Brittany asked and reached out to pull Santana closer to the window.

"In there?" Santana asked with a frown.

"No to the moon…" Brittany said sarcastically but her face changed immediately.

"Oh! Let's go the moon as soon as they allow tourists!" She exclaimed and backed away from the window, looking around curiously in the class room and losing herself in her daydreams.

"Britt, come back here!" Santana said between her teeth like she was still afraid someone would hear them.

"Britt?" She didn't get an answer from the blonde and she could no longer see her in there either, so with one last careful look around she took a deep breath and crammed her tiny body in the window. She just barely landed on her feet and when she had straightened herself and looked up she still didn't see Brittany.

"What do you think you're doing here, young lady?" A voice said behind her back. Brittany had her body pressed against the wall next to the window where she had been hiding from Santana's sight. She also had a seductive smirk on her face but at first Santana didn't catch on.

"I was follo-"

"Trespassing on school grounds, are we?" Brittany interrupted in a hoarse voice and walked towards Santana in such a threatening manner it had Santana backing away.

"But-"

"No buts! As your principle, I am not very pleased Ms. Lopez." Brittany continued and Santana's backwards steps soon had her against the teacher's desk, but Brittany continued moving closer until her breath hit the Latina's face. Santana almost moaned but caught it in her throat. This game was awesome!

"I'm afraid I have to suspend you for the rest of this semester…" Brittany said and gave Santana a disappointed head shake.

"Please no! Not that, Ms. Principle, I'll do anything..." Santana whined in a helpless voice and covered her face like she was about to cry.

"Anything?" Brittany asked with a challenging eyebrow hovering slightly higher than the other one. Santana let her eyes rest on the blonde's lips and she lifted her hands to unzip her own jacket. She pulled it down over her shoulders and let it fall to the floor.

"Anything." She confirmed and bit her lip.

Brittany plunged her lips against Santana and within seconds their tongues were dancing hungrily with each other. Brittany took the final step to press their bodies together and pushed Santana to sit down. She forcefully parted the Latina's legs and stepped between them, pulling in the folds of Santana's knees to have her on the very edge of the desk.

Santana arched her back to bring them even closer for a while and then she created space between their upper bodies again to make room for her taking her shirt off. She shivered at the cold, the heating was clearly not on, but she was too fucking turned on to care.

She moved backwards slowly, giving a moaning Brittany a little show as she leaned down to lie with her back against the desk. Brittany looked at the stretched out upper body of her panting girlfriend and reached her hand out to touch. She ran her hand from under Santana's chin, down her neck, her chest and her stomach. Her fingertips burned at the contact.

She undid the button and zipped Santana's pants down but she didn't bother to take them off before reaching in the underwear and feeling Santana's drenched folds against desperate fingers. She teased up and down the slit.

"_Hrrrmmmmguuuh_." Santana uttered at the contact. Her hand jerked and knocked something over. It fell on the floor and the bang echoed but neither cared to even look what it was, let alone pick it up.

Brittany's other hand had been held in place under Santana's knee, but trusting that Santana could keep her legs there on her own, it moved to massage one of Santana's breasts. Santana groaned and pressed her palm against the wooden board of the desk. Brittany found Santana's entrance but didn't dip inside just yet.

"Ms. Principle, please!" Santana begged and Brittany didn't have to be asked twice before letting two fingers slip inside Santana, who drew a husky breath in reaction. Brittany started pumping in and out of Santana as best she could with the clothing hindering her motions. She lubricated her thumb with Santana's sweet lady juices and started working the clit.

Suddenly Brittany thought she heard a noise from outside the classroom in the hallway. She wasn't sure because Santana was not exactly being quiet. She didn't stop her motioning between Santana's legs but it became more hesitant as she tried to listen for something to sound again. Santana felt it and grunted in frustration.

"Don't stop!" She demanded and her hand shot to Brittany's hand on her breast, pressing it down harder on her lady lump.

"San, I think someone's out there." Brittany whispered.

"I don't care! I need you to not stop right now." Santana said, her voice raspy with need and she bucked her hips against Brittany's hand to signal with her body for the blonde to keep going.

Brittany started going faster again, her thumb playing more wildly with Santana's swollen nub. She kept throwing worried glances over at the door but no one came through it. Then she heard something again. This time Santana heard it too. She opened her eyes and found Brittany's worried ones.

"Don't stop!" She warned the blonde. Brittany's arm was getting tired but she needed to get Santana off fast or they were likely to end up in the local paper. She swirled her fingers inside the Latina, grazing over the special spot teasingly then pumped in and out furiously.

Santana's breath picked up fast and her orgasm was building up. That feeling when you don't know what to do with any of your body parts grew enormous and she threw her head back, a loud moan escaping from deep in her throat, and her nails dug into the wood under her body.

"Don't stop, don't stop!" She repeated and knew she only needed a few more seconds. Brittany was getting seriously scared of someone walking in now and crooked her fingers while pressing down on Santana's clit.

"_Brittanyyyyy_!" Santana did her best not to scream as her walls tightened hard around Brittany's fingers. Brittany drew a breath of relief and let her fingers slide slowly in and out a couple of times before taking her hand out of Santana's pants.

Santana lifted her upper body to sit upright again. The two looked each other in the eye for one second and in the silence they were sure they both heard steps coming closer. They both charged for the window, Santana picking up her clothes on the way.

While Brittany climbed out Santana hurried to put her shirt on and while they were running towards the car she managed to get her jacket on. They got in it and slammed the doors shut. They were both panting and looking straight ahead.

"You're crazy." Brittany said, a little out of breath.

"You were crazy first." Santana pointed out with the previous running shining through her voice as well. At the same time they turned their heads towards each other, their chests still heaving.

"I love you." Brittany said.

"I loved you first." Santana answered with a crooked smile.

* * *

><p>"Right, I'll get the star fruit, you get the nutmeg." Santana instructed Brittany inside the grocery store and Brittany watched as the Latina took off in a different direction again.<p>

Brittany looked around. She had no idea where to find anything but started strolling down the aisles with the shopping cart that Santana had left in her care.

She eventually found it but in the corner of her eye she saw someone else also going for it. Noticing that there was only one jar left she hurried and reached for it just in time to snip it from under the other woman's nose.

"I believe that was my nutmeg." The blonde woman said and raised an eyebrow at Brittany. She was wearing skin tight, black jeans and a leather jacket. She was beautiful, but at first glance a little intimidating as well.

"I'm sorry. I just really need it. I have very specific instructions…" Brittany began to explain as she was more than reluctant to give the jar away. She knew how Santana got when she didn't have the right ingredients and the New Years Eve party was really important.

"Are you new in town?" Leather jacket asked with an almost flirtatious smile. Brittany shook her head.

"No, I'm just here with my girlfriend visiting her parents over the holidays." Brittany explained and politely smiled back.

"Girlfriend, huh?" Black-pants-lady asked with a tilted head and a raised eyebrow, looking Brittany up and down. Brittany wasn't sure if this was flirting or not but she had made it clear that she had a girlfriend so she smiled back and nodded.

"Who's your girlfriend? Maybe I know her?"

"Oh, she doesn't live here anymore. But she grew up here. Her name is Santana." Brittany explained. Brittany thought she saw something happen in the other woman's eyes for a second, but she wasn't sure.

They struck up a conversation about the upcoming New Years and it drifted into chit-chat about anything and everything. Brittany was taken by how nice the woman was. She almost felt a little guilty about stealing the nutty spice from her.

"Seeing as how I have no intension of giving you this…" Brittany started and shook the jar of nutmeg.

"... I don't think Santana would mind and her parents are really cool… Would you like to come to our party?" Brittany asked without putting too much pressure behind the words. They had just met after all. A crooked smile pulled at the corners of Blondie's mouth.

"I thought you'd never ask…"

...

Santana found Brittany in the cereal aisle, putting a box of Lucky Charms in the cart.

"This store sucks. They didn't even have star fruit. But it's fine, I'll make it work anyways. I won't let it stress me out." Santana said, sounding like she had already stressed out about it when she put a plastic bag of pears in the cart.

"Guess what? I made a new friend!" Brittany beamed.

"How? Who?" Santana asked confused, partly because Brittany completely changed the subject and she needed a second to catch up and partly because the grocery store isn't the typical place to meet new people.

"We reached for the same nutmeg jar and it was the last one but I got it! I invited her to the party. I hope that's okay?"

"Brittany, are you picking up women in the grocery store?" Santana joked.

"Santana, are you jealous?" Brittany kidded back.

"As a matter of fact, yes." Santana spoke formally but smiled goofily.

"Well, you don't have to be. You know I only have eyes for you." Brittany smiled and wrapped her arms around Santana. After a quick kiss Brittany spoke again.

"She was more your type anyways."

"What was her name?" Santana asked casually.

"I, oh… I don't know actually…" Brittany realized and Santana chuckled. She smiled lovingly at her adorable girlfriend until she heard a familiar voice behind her that made her blood freeze.

"Hey, hot stuff!"

Santana spun around and there she was.

"That's her!" Brittany blurted excitedly.

"Holly?"

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><p><em>Mollie... is that a... a cliffhanger? <em>

_It might be..._


	24. Chapter 24

Kabaang! Over 300 reviews! I seem to have lost my words but if I find them I can assure you that all the best ones are reserved for you! Thank you!

You know how when_ "DON'T CHA WISH YOUR GIRLFRIEND WAS HOT LIKE ME"_ starts playing on the radio and you break out into some sort of booty shaking dance.. and then you realize you're at the gym and everyone's staring at you? EXACTLY! We've all been there.

**CHAPTER 24**

"**Hey there, Santana" **

"Oh." Brittany breathed and her eyes flickered back and forth between Santana and Holly as there seemed to be some sort of a staring contest going on between the two. Holly smiled and her face looked triumphant while Santana's eyes looked terrified and her jaw was slightly dropped at the surprise.

"Aren't you going to say hello?" Holly wanted to know and raised her eyebrows.

"Hi… _Holly_." Santana said hesitantly. She had to say the name again just to make sure it was really her. She couldn't believe she was actually seeing what she was seeing. It had been over four years since last time.

"Hi. Nice to see you too." Holly chirped sarcastically but with a kind smile. "I was wondering when I might run into you again."

"How's Josh?" Santana asked out of the blue. She already regretted it but it was all she could think of in her state of complete shock.

"He's fine… Married with a kid I think." Holly said, making it clear they were no longer an item, nor had they been one for quite some time.

"And how's _your_ husband?" Santana asked in a little bit of a spiteful tone. It was definitely growing to be a more and more unpleasant tension in the group.

"I don't have one. Santana, why are you…-?"

"Don't you just love Lucky Charms?" Brittany interrupted as she was getting very uncomfortable. "I love the little marshmallows." _Oh it was so smooth._

"Yeah, delicious." Holly dismissed and turned her head to Santana again. "Santana, are you mad at me or something?"

"Now why would I be mad at you?" Santana challenged, crossing her arms over her chest. Holly looked a little intimidated with this 'new' Santana. This is not how Holly was used to seeing her. She used to have that girl wrapped around her finger. And to be honest, she didn't like to no longer have that power.

"I don't know, frankly. Care to share?" Holly said and crossed her arms too. There was more quiet staring for a while and with the turmoil going on inside Santana she didn't know how much longer she could keep it up.

Brittany squirmed. The usually bubbly and babbly blonde couldn't think of anything to say. She had never been this uncomfortable in her life. She could just see history being exchanged between the other two women's eyes and she couldn't help but feel incredibly misplaced since she had no idea what those looks meant.

Suddenly Holly's face changed from serious to smirking again and she let her hands fall.

"Are you making those nutmeg chocolate chip cookies I taught you to make?" She asked and eyed the ingredients in the shopping cart.

"No, I'm not." Santana answered quickly. Those were the exact cookies she had planned to make, although now she would have to think of something else. Holly turned to Brittany.

"She's a good cook, isn't she?" Holly asked the other blonde who nodded with sparkling eyes in return.

"Yeah, she's amazing." Brittany beamed.

"That's what I thought. She learned it _aaall_ from me." Holly said smugly with a crooked smile.

"No I didn't!" Santana blurted and turned to Brittany. "I really didn't." She repeated to her girlfriend but that only earned a mocking laugh from Holly.

"Isn't this fun how you have so much in common…?" Brittany muttered sarcastically, mostly to herself. Holly ignored her anyways which made this weird feeling she had become even more powerful. Was it jealousy?

"Remember how we would always cook at my house because my parents were never there and we always started food fights and we always had to shower… together…naked…" Holly practically ogled Santana. Brittany felt her fingernails dig into her palm as her fists clenched shut. Oh yeah, this was definitely jealousy!

"Okay!" Santana barked to get Holly to shut up. Santana's mind was aching and she couldn't even begin to image what Brittany was going through right now. She couldn't handle this. Not here. Not now. Not ever.

"Look, Holly. It was nice to meet you and everything but we have to go now." Santana said and pulled on Brittany with one hand while trying to steer the shopping cart with the other.

"Yeah, awesome seeing you!" Holly called after her.

"You look great by the way!" She added but Santana didn't look back.

"See you at the party!" The last of the blonde's words had Santana's eyes going wide. Holly was still coming to the party? Suddenly Santana's feet felt incredibly heavy and every step felt like slow motion. Would she ever get out of here?

* * *

><p><em><strong>December 31st, New Year's Eve<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana ladled some punch onto a glass and took a sip. No alcohol. <em>Not<em> the one she was aiming for. She emptied her glass and filled it again, this time with the punch from the other bowl. That's better. She downed the glass and filled it again but she intended to sip this round.

"Baby, are you okay?" Brittany asked carefully, seeing her stressed girlfriend fidgeting with everything and already having drunken a lot.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Santana answered and shrugged. Knowing she wasn't, Brittany put her arms around Santana and tried to let their unison breathing calm the Latina. Santana squirmed out of her grip and took another gulp. Brittany's heart felt a little sting. Santana had been so distant since yesterday.

"Look, everyone's already here. She's probably not coming." Brittany said quietly but it was like the Gods heard her and wanted to mess with them because she had barely finished the sentence before there was a knock on the door.

"You were saying?" Santana said with a frown and drank the rest of the content in her glass before looking into Brittany's eyes. They looked almost apologetic.

"I'm sorry I-"

"You couldn't have known." Santana said in a short tone and pecked the blonde's lips before going to answer the door. It was a kiss, but somehow it didn't make Brittany feel the slightest bit better. Santana wanted to just lock the door but instead she rendered it open.

Holly wore a purple, short, tight, look-at-my-boobs dress and for a second Santana had to do just that. She immediately kicked herself and her eyes shot up again.

"Hello, to you too." Holly smirked.

"Can I come in or what?" She asked but didn't wait for Santana to answer before going inside. She carelessly discarded of her coat and didn't say anything else. She walked past Santana and started mingling with other people instead. She could be so nice and charming if she wanted to and if Holly liked you – you liked Holly. She just had that about her.

Santana was just about to go back into the living room when her father came towards her.

"What is she doing here, mija?" Álvaro asked with the worried wrinkle between his brows looking deeper than ever.

"I…" Santana started but she didn't really have an answer.

"Do you want me to kick her out? Santana, just tell me and I will. She hurt you and I don't want her in my house." Santana's father persisted but Santana just shook her head.

"No." She murmured quietly.

"Santana…-"

"No, just… don't kick her out." Santana said and stepped past her father to go back into the living room.

The thing was, Holly hadn't just hurt her that one time. Álvaro had lost count of how many times Santana had come home crying. Every time he had comforted her. Every time he had told her to just let Holly go. But every time Holly wanted her to – Santana had gone back. Álvaro sighed and shook his head slightly.

When turning around he was presented with Brittany's face, and it looked bothered by something.

"Should I be worried here?" Brittany asked with furrowed eyebrows, looking more hurt than worried, like she already knew the answer. Álvaro put his large hand on Brittany's cheek. It was warm and comforting but Brittany didn't want comfort. She wanted reassurance.

"Santana loves you." He said sincerely. But he didn't say that was enough.

...

Holly and Santana fell into an almost dance like routine during the night. Whenever one of them got too close, the other moved away. Santana found midnight closing in and she still hadn't said a single word to Holly. She was a little stumped, but also relieved. Well, she would have been relieved but somehow she had this feeling. This calm before storm feeling.

She went into the kitchen to see if there was anything she could do. Refill the snacks or make more punch or clean something or just whatever to keep her hands busy. A blonde guy and a brunette girl were making out and he had her up against the wall. Santana soon realized it was her sister and her boyfriend. She instantly stepped between them.

"You know what, this is not- Hey honeys! It's not a Big Red commercial. No me gusta!"

"Santana!" Carmen hollered and attempted to smack her sister.

"Is that a hickey?" Santana asked and took another look at Carmen's neck. Sam squirmed a little, clearly he was the guilty one.

"Santana! Stop embarrassing me!" Carmen exclaimed with more irritation.

"Sam, is it? I gots my eye on you! And that guppy mouth of yours." Santana knew what a pain she was being, but she had been walking around on edge for almost two hours now and she had to take it out on someone. That large trouty mouth made for a good target.

"San!"

"I think he's hot." A voice said from across the room. Santana turned around despite knowing who the voice belonged to. Holly of course. Carmen grabbed her boyfriend by the wrist and the two snuck out of the room leaving Santana alone with her nightmare.

"Holly…" Santana began but the blonde opened her mouth to interrupt so Santana let her own voice fade out.

"I know why you're mad at me. I get it." Holly said and actually sounded like there was compassion in her voice.

"Can we talk? Somewhere private?" Holly asked and much to her own surprise - Santana nodded. She just… had to listen if Holly had anything to say.

They walked in silence up the stairs and into Santana's room. Santana didn't close the door though, she was getting claustrophobic.

"So…" Holly started. "How've you been?"

"I've been good. I've been great." Santana answered in a short tone. She didn't bring Holly up here to catch up. It was quiet for a little while. Santana didn't know what to say. She wasn't sure how to feel. Holly grabbed Santana's guitar and started strumming on it after sitting down in a chair.

"_Hey there, Santana. What's it like in New York City? You've been a thousand miles away but girl tonight you look so pretty, yes you do…"_ Holly sang Plain White T's but changed their lyrics to fit better. Santana used to love when Holly did that with songs. Especially when she sang them for her. The strumming faded and so did Holly's smile.

"You're lucky. I've been… not so great." Holly claimed, putting the guitar down and looking around in Santana's room like it was just yesterday they had snuck up here to make out. She noticed that there were no longer any photos of herself in the room though. A sad smile crossed her lips. She picked up a framed photo of Santana on a swing.

"I took this." She said and shook the photo at Santana before placing it on the desk again.

"Remember how we jumped off the swing full speed and whoever landed farthest away would get to kiss the other?" Holly laughed.

"I loved that game. Whether I won or lost I always got to kiss you." Holly said and her amorous voice had Santana becoming less and less sure of herself. She fidgeted with whatever her fingers could reach.

"You got to kiss me anyways..." Santana murmured shyly.

"Yeah." Holly snorted happily. "I guess I did."

Santana searched for the right words but Holly beat her to it.

"I was a fool to let your fine booty go, Santana." Holly said and tilted her head.

"Uh… I... Oh." Santana breathed hesitantly. What was happening here?

"I want you back." Holly said matter of factly like her words would twist the universe and make it happen. Santana blinked a couple of times to make sure she heard the blonde correctly. This was more like real Holly. Making demands and expecting nothing but full satisfaction. Santana snorted.

"Do you really? Or do you only want me because you can't have me?" Santana asked spitefully. Holly seemed amused.

"Does is matter? You can have me." Holly said with a shrug.

Santana felt around. Did she want this? In the past Santana had spent so much of her time fantasizing about hearing Holly tell her she belonged to Santana. She had seen it play out a million different ways. Now that it was here it didn't have the same impact she thought it would have. Of course back then she had imagined it with an angry, confronting rant from herself, followed by a teary, sad apology from Holly, followed by steamy, hot make-up sex but now... All she could see was Brittany's face.

"I'm with Brittany." Santana answered matter of factly but Holly didn't even acknowledge her words. She took a couple of steps and stroked her fingers over the satin sheets on Santana's bed.

"Remember when we…-?" Holly started.

"Yes. Yes, I do. I remember everything, okay?" Santana interjected with irritation. She needed Holly to just stop talking about the past. More than ever it was just that. The past.

"Rocked your world, huh?" Holly joked and was suddenly a lot closer to Santana.

"I don't wanna talk about this." Santana made clear but Holly wrapped her arms around Santana.

"You want me." She said hoarsely and pulled their body's close. Santana looked into Holly's eyes but all those things that used to happen... didn't. Her heart just didn't feel it anymore. _Oh, is this how it feels to be over someone?_

"I don't actually." Santana clarified and squirmed out of Holly's grip.

"It's always been us, San." Holly said and tried to force her lips on Santana who successfully dodged them.

"Holly, I'm not going to kiss you. We're not in high school anymore. I'm not… I'm not in love with you." Santana said. The words shocked her. It was the first time she had been able to say it and know with certainty how true it was.

Santana backed up towards the door and made sure a great distance was created between the two. Holly looked offended but she still had a hint of a smirk toying in her face.

"Right… that's why you're sleeping with my long lost twin out there?"

"Whuh, what?" Santana frowned. She didn't understand what Holly meant.

"Oh, please. Could you have picked a girlfriend that looks more like me?" Holly said and rolled her eyes.

"She's not you." Santana said firmly.

"Well, obviously. I'm awesome." Holly shrugged.

"No, she's-"

"We both know that the only reason you're with her is because she reminds you of me." Holly said and now her smile almost looked evil as her eyes looked beyond Santana to the doorway.

"_Oh my God._" Brittany breathed with her hand over her mouth. Santana turned around and saw the wet eyes of her girlfriend in the door. One second went by in slow motion and then everything went too fast. Brittany turned her steps and ran down the stairs. Santana reached her hand out like that would stop Brittany but of course it didn't. Santana felt anger flare up. Her chest started to heave as she turned back and was met with a disgustingly pleased look on Holly's face.

"SHE'S NOTHING LIKE YOU!" Santana roared and then stormed after Brittany. She almost fell down the stairs but managed to grab the banister and fend it off with some grace. She furiously looked around the room. Most guests had dark hair so it wasn't supposed to be this hard to spot Brittany in the crowd, but she was nowhere to be found.

"Have you seen Brittany?" Santana asked her aunt Maria who shook her head since she barely remembered meeting this Brittany person.

"Have you seen Brittany?" Santana repeated to someone else, but looking up at the person she realized that he was a complete stranger to her.

"Has anyone seen Brittany?" She hollered for the whole room to hear and everyone stopped talking and looked at her.

"Is that her?" Someone asked and pointed through the window out to the street were a woman was walking away from the house with determined steps. Brittany didn't even have a coat on and it was actually snowing now.

Santana charged for the front door and grabbed the closest coat she could reach while storming out of the house. She ran down the street and the slushy snow seeped into her heels and froze her feet one toe at a time. Brittany had no place to go and she wasn't walking with particularly fast steps so pretty soon Santana had caught up with her.

Brittany had walked with her arms wrapped around herself to warm her body, since her dress didn't cover that much of it, but when she saw Santana next to her she let her arms fall to her sides. She was too proud to admit that running out into the streets was probably not the brightest idea.

"Brittany?" Santana tried and put her hand on Brittany who shrugged it off.

"No." She answered simply.

"She said that, not me!" Santana grunted frustrated.

"I know." Brittany said but continued walking. She wasn't actually angry with Santana. She was furious with Holly, but mostly she was just afraid.

"So then why are you-?" Santana started but was interrupted when Brittany disappeared from her sight as the blonde stopped and Santana kept walking. Santana stopped too and turned around. Brittany was shuddering from the cold.

"Take the coat." Santana said gently and extended it to Brittany. Brittany refused to take it and shook her head. Santana stepped closer and put it around Brittany's shoulders. The blonde didn't assist but at least she didn't protest. Santana held on to the coat to keep it in place, and to have an excuse to not move away from Brittany.

"Now you're cold." Brittany said softly.

"As long as you're warm." Santana said gingerly and her grip on the coat tightened. Santana was looking at Brittany's eyes but she just saw the blonde's eyelids as Brittany was staring intensely at the ground. When she lifted her gaze it revealed silent tears streaming down her face.

"Do you wish I was her?" Brittany asked and finished with a clench of her jaw to keep from sobbing.

"Are you crazy?" Santana asked with gentleness in her voice.

"Do you?" Brittany insisted.

"No." Santana answered honestly.

"It's true." Brittany whispered. "I'm just like her. We look alike and when we were talking in the store I thought; Hm, we get along really well and…" Brittany's voice was in agony, as was her heart.

"And I thought; Santana would really like her." Brittany sniffled and looked away in defeat.

"Hey…" Santana said gingerly and lifted her hand to stroke away some tears from the cold cheeks of the blonde.

"She wants you." Brittany stated, wiping away tears from her other cheek.

"I want you." Santana said and it was probably one of the truest things to ever cross her lips. Holly was a ghost from the past and to be honest she had haunted Santana for a while but being confronted with her now Santana had no doubt in her mind that her heart belonged to Brittany.

"Are you sure? I mean, she's the real thing and I'm just a… replica." Brittany said and finished with a snort.

"Replica? Honey, you two are nothing alike." Santana ensured but Brittany shook her head in disagreement.

"Yes, we are…-"

"No you're not! She's nowhere near as kind, and warm, and loving as you… She's not as charming, or as generous. She doesn't know how to listen to other people and she only thinks about herself. She's not as understanding or as sweet as you. Nor is she as wickedly sexy… She's got nothing on you, babe." Santana spoke lovingly and with every word she had the blonde's face light up a little more until an actual, tiny little smile was playing on Brittany's lips.

"I don't think I've met two people more different in my entire life." Santana stated and Brittany let out a little laugh through her tears.

"Not that it matters…" Santana added and Brittany furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"Brittany, I didn't fall in love with you because you're like Holly. But I didn't fall in love with you because you're different from Holly either. I fell in love with you because you're you. Because of your laugh and your quirks and your big, big heart… I mean, you remember what socks I wear." Santana smiled widely but had a tear run down her cheek. Brittany wasn't crying anymore though.

"You're the most Brittany person I've ever met and, uhm... you're my unicorn." Santana said with a determined nod but barely had time to finish before Brittany pressed her lips against Santana's. The cold tips of their noses teased against each other's cheeks in the kiss. Brittany took the coat of her shoulders and wrapped it around Santana's instead. When feeling the warm material around her freezing body Santana pulled away from the kiss.

"As long as you're warm." Brittany said before Santana had a chance to protest.

"Let's share." Santana said, slipping her arms in the sleeves and then opened the coat wide for Brittany to slip in it. Brittany wrapped her arms around Santana inside the coat and pressed her body against Santana.

"Sorry I got jealous, it's just…" Brittany murmured against Santana in the warm embrace.

"Just what?" Santana asked gingerly when Brittany didn't finish.

"The thought of not being with you was… I'm so crazy in love with you." Brittany said with a smile. Santana backed her head slightly to look at Brittany again. What's crazy is how Santana just can't get enough of looking at her.

"I'm pretty loony for you too." Santana nodded lovingly and with a hand on the back of Brittany's neck she pulled the blonde in for another kiss. The second their lips met, fireworks started shooting up from people's gardens. A jolly murmur of happy people filled the streets and both girls opened their eyes slightly in the kiss to glance up at the colourful sky.

"Well, if I had a dollar every time that happens…" Brittany said with a crooked smile. Santana shook her head.

"You're such a dork."

* * *

><p><em>Did I have you worried? A little? Do you have any idea how hard I had to work to not cut it off at Brittany storming out and leaving you with another cliff hanger? I'd say therapy is paying off!<em>


	25. Chapter 25

I was in school today and the cafeteria had this candy bar. Not joking! It was called **_Holly – the original_**. I was like fuck you candy bar! So I bought it and stepped on it. Then I felt bad about wasting food so I picked it up again and fed it to birds.

So chapter 25 was originally supposed to cut right to March but my therapist was like _what's with the stress, yo? _And since I have this huge essay due like an hour ago I was just itching for reasons to not get started, and I thought why not write another chapter? It's a little fillery but hopefully not yuckishly boring.

**CHAPTER 25**

"**Take this"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>January 5th<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Merry Christmas and a happy new year." Santana said like a cheesy recorded voice when Emma opened the door.<p>

"We come bearing gifts!" Brittany chirped shortly after and handed Emma a big plastic bag stuffed with presents. Santana and Brittany stepped inside and proceeded to take their big jackets off. It was super cold outside.

"You're like Santa." Emma said smilingly while peeking in the bag. Brittany squealed with joy at the statement.

"Are you okay with carrying that? Here, let me." Santana said and took the bag away from Emma again.

"Santana, it's fine." Emma said but was ignored by the Latina who continued into the living room.

"Look at you." Brittany said lovingly and put her hand on Emma's stomach. With seven months you could definitely tell what was going on in there.

"Oh my God he kicked!" Brittany exclaimed. "He kicked, he kicked." She repeated excitedly. Emma half giggled, half hummed in approval. Santana came rushing back into the hall, looking flustered as ever.

"What? How? Where?" She asked nervously.

"In the stomach, silly." Brittany said in a little chuckle.

"Here." Emma said softly and took Santana's hand, guiding it to the previous spot of activity. Santana was almost afraid to even touch Emma's stomach because she was so afraid to do something wrong and hurt the baby but she held her hand in place softly and waited. Brittany skipped into the living room and took a seat on the couch, waiting for the others to join her.

"I don't feel it…" Santana whispered almost inaudibly and pursed her lips as she was trying to hold back tears. Emma was a little taken by the strong reaction and almost felt guilty that her little baby wouldn't kick on command.

"Just wait." She said gently and tried giving Santana a reassuring nod but the Latina's eyes was so fixed on the round belly she didn't even see it. A few more seconds passed and Emma tried hard to will a kick to happen. She lifted her own hands and put them over Santana's. To her relief she felt the little one stir inside her and Santana drew an urgent breath at the feel of it against her palm.

"That's amazing." Santana whispered and withdrew her hand, turning her palm upwards and looking at it like she could see the kick in dancing in it. Brittany popped her head in again.

"Come on you guys! Presents!" She chirped with more excitement and clapped her hands. Every one walked into the living room and Santana and Brittany sat down on the couch while Emma took one of the armchairs on the other side of the coffee table. Brittany was in heaven with this and handed gift after gift to Emma. Mostly it was just baby stuff. Cute little outfits, cute little shoes, some toys but there was also stuff for Emma and a thing or two for Emma and Noah as a couple.

"This is so much…" Emma said hesitantly but gratefully.

"Don't look at me." Santana joked and lifted her hands in defence. Brittany just smiled. She didn't think there was such a thing as giving too much.

"Who wants tea? Or coffee? Or cookies?" Emma asked and stood up again.

"I'll get it!" Santana offered quickly and motioned for Emma to sit down again. Brittany giggled at how nervous Santana seemed to be about this whole baby thing.

"Santana. It's fine." Emma said, a little more firmly this time and walked into the kitchen.

"You're being weird." Brittany joked lovingly.

"I'm not being weird." Santana was quick to respond and her attempt to sound casual failed miserably. Brittany was just joking and this was not the reaction she had expected so she was a little lost on words.

After a while of not saying much Emma entered the room again, carrying a large tray with three cups and a plate of chocolate chip cookies. Santana clenched the cushion with one hand as she was itching to stand up and help but doing everything she could to fight that urge.

When Emma had finally put the tray down Santana could relax. The cups were distributed. A coffee for Santana, an herbal tea for Emma and a hot chocolate for Brittany.

"So how was Ohio?" Emma asked and raised her eyebrows in interest. Santana giggled and leaned back in the couch.

"Well, the new year came off to an interesting start, right B?" Santana said playfully.

"Stop it." Brittany said, sounding a little embarrassed, and nudged Santana with her whole body.

"Britt punched Holly in the face." Santana said, ignoring Brittany's request and causing Emma to almost choke on the hot liquid in her mouth.

"I didn't... punch her hard or anything…" Brittany said coyly and lifted her hands in an apologetic manner.

"Right in the face." Santana repeated and gave off a proud smile as she glanced over at her bad ass girlfriend.

* * *

><p><strong><em>January 1st, 2014<em>**

* * *

><p><em>After the fireworks Brittany and Santana walked hand in hand back to the house. They were both freezing and could not be more eager to go inside. Brittany was the first in the door but stopped just a few steps in. Santana was a little distracted and walked right into Brittany due to the blonde's sudden halt.<em>

"_Britt, what the-" Santana started but was interrupted. _

"_Well, if it isn't tweedle dumb…" Holly snorted at Brittany, not at all pleased with having Santana's girlfriend back in the house. She stood right in the middle of the vestibule with her hands on her hips and that disgusting smirk on her face like she owned the place. _

"_I think you should leave." Santana said, stepping forward slightly to stand next to Brittany like the allies they were. _

"_I'll drink to that." Álvaro chirped in the background but didn't get acknowledged by any of the three ladies. _

"_San, c'mon. This idiot?" Holly said and pointed to Brittany. _

"_Hey! You cannot call my girlfriend an idiot. It's mean, it's bullshit and I won't accept it." Santana hollered angrily. There was quite the gathering around the intriguing event by now and Santana's loud words had even more of the guests tuning in. _

"_Geez, calm down." Holly breathed and rolled her eyes. There was a little pause and the suspense grew in the group of surrounding spectators. _

"_Santana, look at me, and then look at… her." Holly said and spitefully eyed Brittany up and down. Santana turned and looked at Brittany. The blonde mimicked and let her blue orbs fall deep into Santana's brown. Smiles formed on there lips as if automatically and it was like nothing else mattered. They stared into each other's eyes for seconds and Santana gave a little reassuring nod, letting Brittany know she didn't have to doubt Santana again._

"_Is this what you mean when you say they have eye sex all the time?" Sam whispered to Carmen without taking his eyes off Santana and Brittany's intense stare. _

"_Uh-huh." Carmen nodded and rolled her eyes. These two seriously needed to stop humping each other with their eyes. The moment was sweet and appreciated by everyone but Holly who grew impatient._

"_So, what's it gonna be Lopez?" Holly asked. Admitting defeat did not exist to her. Holly always gets what Holly wants. Santana didn't turn back to Holly just yet but Brittany's eyes shot the rivalling blonde. _

"_She's with me." Brittany said firmly. _

"_Why don't we let Santana decide?" Holly said condescendingly and tilted her head in the same manner. Brittany was getting so fed up with being treated this way. _

"_No, why don't you let me make something very clear?" Brittany said, louder this time, and even took a step closer in such a threatening way it had Holly's whole demeanour changing slightly. Holly was stumped for words but Brittany wasn't about to let her speak anyway. _

"_Santana is my girlfriend. Santana is my future wife, and one day she'll be the mother of my children. If you think a ten dollar boob job and a slutty little dress is gonna change that you are seriously mistaking." Brittany said and she was so angry she didn't even care that she was being mean, something otherwise impossible for her. Santana just stared with wide eyes. She was also so angry with Holly, she was extremely intruiged by this new side of Brittany and mostly she was just freakishly turned on. _

"_Urgh, get out of my face._ _I don't have to take this from you." Holly said affrontedly. _

"_Take this." Brittany snorted and having already balled her fist she lifted it and launched it right towards Holly's face. There was a thump at the impact and all around in the crowd were wide eyes and dropped jaws. Santana's breath stuck in her throat and she said the only thing that came to mind. _

"_Wanky."_

* * *

><p>The drive home from Emma was silent. It had gotten pretty late. Puck came home after a couple of hours and they had dinner, then dessert, and time just flew by.<p>

Santana looked out the dark window on the passenger side and Brittany looked ahead, fully focused on the road. Santana yawned first and Brittany was close behind. They giggled but neither started a conversation.

The elevator ride up the apartment was silent. Santana let her head rest on Brittany's shoulder but pretty soon they had reached their floor so she lifted it upright again and in silence they walked down the hall to their apartment.

"So, do you wanna just go to bed?" Santana asked carefully when they had taken off their shoes and jackets and were walking together towards the bedroom.

"Yeah, sure." Brittany responded and took her shirt off, carelessly throwing it on a chair. Santana gave Brittany a look that asked what the hell was going on, but since Brittany wasn't looking at Santana she didn't see it.

Pretty soon Brittany was in her pyjamas and went to brush her teeth. They crossed paths in the hallway as Brittany was coming out and Santana was going in.

"Good night." Brittany said as they passed each other.

"Babe, I'll be right in…" Santana protested but Brittany didn't stop or even answer over her shoulder. Santana started going over in her mind what she could have done wrong.

This wasn't like Brittany. She usually just spoke out if she was upset about something. And usually she didn't even have time to speak out before Santana realized her mistake and apologized but this time she didn't see what she had done. She brushed her teeth, washed her face, and peed.

When she came back to the bedroom Brittany was already lying with closed eyes, on her side of the bed, facing the wall instead of facing Santana's side. Santana sighed and crawled into bed. She tried lying calmly on her back, on her side of the bed, but she didn't like it.

She tried lying on her side but it wasn't comfy enough to fall asleep. She tried her stomach too and pretty soon she had twirled around and tried every position possible three times each. She sighed again and shifted closer.

A little closer. And the last final bit until her thighs touched the back of Brittany's thighs, until the blonde's butt curved against her stomach and until she smelled Brittany and felt her warmth. She even let her arm snake over Brittany's hip but there was no change in Brittany. Santana knew she wasn't sleeping, she could hear it on her breathing.

"I'm not weirded out about what you said. About me. Becoming your wife and mother of your children." Santana blurted suddenly. Brittany hadn't actually suggested it but Santana just had this feeling that was what Brittany was thinking.

"You're not?" Brittany asked and spun around under Santana's arm quickly, sounding almost surprised. So Santana had been right and Brittany had been thinking it.

"No." Santana answered calmly and shook her head in an amorous smile. "I want those things too some day."

Brittany's face scooted closer. A little closer. And then the last final bit until her lips pressed softly against Santana's. Santana's hand closed its grip around Brittany's pyjama top and converged them even more. A little whimper escaped Brittany upon tasting Santana. She couldn't even go a couple of hours without missing it.

Brittany moved to lie on top of Santana, not breaking the gentle kiss, and had their stomachs flat against each other and their breasts crushing together. Santana ran her tongue over Brittany's bottom lip but instead of opening her mouth and granting it entrance Brittany pulled away.

"Wanna practice making a baby?"


	26. Chapter 26

I'm mad at this website... but it's still my favorite

**CHAPTER 26**

**"Born"**

* * *

><p><strong>March 7th<strong>

* * *

><p>"Fuck." Santana muttered between her teeth and started banging against the counter, tenderizing chicken.<p>

"Babe, it's gonna be great." Brittany said and hugged Santana from behind and the Latina stopped her assault on the meat in reaction.

"You're not even supposed to be in here. What if someone from the health department comes around?" Santana said and turned around in Brittany's arms.

"What kind of bitch health inspector shows up on your opening night?" Brittany questioned with a playful smile.

"What if no one shows up?" Santana sighed. My God, why was she so nervous about this? She had been so psyched about this just yesterday and now she was a wound up mess.

"I thought you were almost fully booked?" Brittany knew this to be true but thought that if Santana got to confirm it she would feel better.

"We are… what if no one likes the food?" Santana could hear how annoying she was being but Brittany just smiled at her with all the love and the warmth that was the blonde.

"Then they're crazy. And I'll kick their butts." Brittany said and kissed Santana's pouting lips. The pout didn't retract right away so Brittany kissed it again and again until Santana couldn't help but smile.

"You're so amazing." Santana murmured, now a bit more loosened up and even smiling.

"No you're so amazing!" Brittany said playfully and nudged Santana's nose with her own. "Well, babe, I have to go now…" Brittany continued and questioned whether Santana would be okay with a frown.

"Right. Tell Emma I said hi." Santana chirped and just had to kiss Brittany one more time.

"Breadstix is gonna be huge, I can feel it!" Brittany said assuringly and walked out of the kitchen, sending her girlfriend air-kisses and happy thoughts before disappearing from the Latina's sight. Santana sighed contently at her incredible girlfriend and then started banging at the chicken again. Tonight had to be great! It just had to!

…

Things were going good, every preparation possible had been made, every single one of the staff had arrived, and the place looked great. It was classy but cosy, it looked roomy but not bare and the bartender was really cute. Not that Santana noticed.

The first reservations were made for seven o'clock and it was now six thirty. Santana took a moment to just relax, she hadn't done that all day and, despite her best efforts, right now it was only going okay.

She went over everything in her head again. She hadn't missed anything. She was sure she hadn't and she still had a feeling like something could blow up in her face. She shrugged the feeling off. It was finally happening. She had her own restaurant. Breadstix was opening tonight. It felt so surreal to her. She had this and she had Brittany and it felt so fucking amazing that she almost felt guilty about being so happy.

"What's on your mind, Lopez?" Kurt, souschef and new found friend, asked in his usual girly voice.

"I'm just… it's gonna be awesome right?" Santana asked, still not convinced she was on top of things.

"Are you kidding? With these fabulous aprons were bound for success!" Kurt exclaimed, eyeing his apron and picking up a chef's cap. He placed it slantwise on Santana's head.

Kurt had begged to be in charge of the outfits and Santana had to admit that her employees looked amazing. The waiters were handsome and the waitresses were sexy without being slutty. The chefs had appropriate clothes but they had been fitted so that they hugged their bodies flatteringly. And the apron and the cap were the final touches that just made it perfect. Oh yeah, and the bartender looked great too. Not that Santana noticed.

"I think you're ready." Kurt said and gave Santana a smile.

It didn't take long after that before the first orders reached the kitchen. Two people, two starters and two main courses. Not too difficult. Four more people, three more starters, four main courses and a side of garlic bread. Not too hard to manage. Two more people, a shared main course and two desserts. A group of six, medium rare, medium rare, well done, the soup, the chicken salad and another medium rare.

Things were getting busier fast but they didn't cross that line to impossibly stressful. Santana had a lot of fun, she bossed people around, which she was basically born to do, and she got to do what she loved. It was an amazing feeling. This must be how Brittany feels when she leaves for her work.

Brittany still hadn't found an actual job but since she didn't need the money there was no rush. She really enjoyed what she was doing now which was, still managing all the charities she was in charge of, but she had also started another help and support group for women who had been raped or abused and needed comfort and strength to get on with their lives. It was inspiring to listen to Brittany talk about that stuff. She was born to help people, she had that heart.

"I need another chicken!" Shelby, waitress and staff cougar, called through the swing door and put a note on the orders-board before disappearing out of the kitchen again.

"Got it!" Sebastian, grill chef and shameless flirter, answered to let everyone know he was taking care of it. Things were going really smoothly so far. Nothing had gone wrong yet. Santana wanted to knock on wood but the metal counter would have to do.

Santana got started on the next order but on her way to the freezer she felt her phone buzz. She took it out of her pocket and saw that Brittany was calling her. _Hello! I'm busy! _Santana thought and put the phone back in her pocket. At first she felt irritated that Brittany would call when she knew that Santana was working but then she felt really guilty about just ignoring the call so when she got back to her station she took her phone out again. She had a text from Brittany.

**Britt-Britt: Babe, I really don't wanna bother you but I thought you might want to know... Emma is in labour.**

Santana read the last word over and over again. Labour. She was having her baby? She wasn't due for another two weeks so that couldn't be true, right?

"Kurt, cover for me." Santana said while heading for the back door. She didn't even know if he heard her but she didn't care as she fumbled with her phone to call Brittany.

"What's going on?" Santana asked instead of greeting her girlfriend when Brittany picked up.

"_Emma's water broke. We're at the hospital."_ Brittany answered. She picked up on Santana's stressed tone and cut right to the chase.

"Is she okay?" Santana asked with worry.

"_Yeah, she's fine. She's scared but they're having her room sterilized for the second time now so she should be calming down soon."_ Brittany spoke calmly.

"Is the baby okay?" Santana asked with more worry.

"_He's an eager little bugger coming early but everything's fine."_ Brittany ensured. She drew a breath. With everything Santana had on her plate right now Brittany wasn't sure if she should say what she was about to say. _"Emma's asking for you." _

Santana stared into the hectic kitchen for a while through the round window.

"I'll be there as soon as I can." She said and hung up, hurrying back into the kitchen. She had to be there for Emma. She was Santana's best friend and Santana had to be there. Child birth is messy and messy freaked Emma out. Pcuk and Santana were pretty much the only people who could take her mind off messy. Maybe Noah could handle it on his own, and Brittany was probably amazing support but the twisting Santana felt in her gut let her know she had to be there.

"Kurt!" Santana called out and grabbed his attention by the balls.

"You're in charge, I have to go." Santana said, taking her cap and apron off and putting on the hook marked Santana.

"You're leaving?" Kurt questioned.

"Can you handle it? Do you think you're ready?" Santana teased, although still sounding stressed.

"I was born ready, baby." Kurt joked back, and threw a flirtatious glance over to Sebastian. With those words Santana hurried out of the restaurant and out to the street where she managed to get a cab almost immediately.

It took her twenty freakin' minutes to get to the hospital and she kept tapping her foot against the floor of the cab. The driver turned the radio up to drown the irritating sound out but Santana couldn't stop tapping. She threw herself out of the taxi, almost forgetting to pay the man behind the wheel and then hurried inside.

Hospitals are always so damn confusing so it took her a while but she finally saw some familiar people pacing in a waiting room. Brittany saw Santana from afar and her face lit up.

"She wants you in there." Brittany said calmly when Santana was close enough to hear her. How could she be so calm? Why was no one freaking out like Santana?

"Where is she?" Santana asked, looking around despite knowing that wouldn't answer her question.

"She's in there." Brittany pointed to a door but before letting Santana go in there she grabbed the Latina's wrists.

"Noah is with her and it's gonna be a little while longer before it's time to start pushing so you can relax… do you want a soda or something?" Brittany asked and lifted one hand to stroke over the side of Santana's face.

"No, I'm fine." Santana said and it came out in a shorter tone than intended. Santana was so worked up. Her heart was beating so fast and even now, being here, the twisting gut feeling wouldn't go away.

Babies are scary. Not like in a ghost or zombie way but because they're so fragile and break so easily. And they trust you with that. It's in your hands, the responsibility of a life. That's huge. Too big, just… too big.

"You might wanna see if you can change into some scrubs or something." Brittany said and looked at Santana's chef's clothes. Her shirt was covered in food stains and marinara sauce. Santana nodded and started to take her shirt off. Brittany laughed a little.

"Maybe not here where everyone can see you." Brittany said gingerly. Santana looked like she was woken from a day dream.

"Right." She answered absentmindedly. Brittany was beginning to worry now.

"Are you okay, San?" Brittany asked gently, guiding Santana's eyes to meet hers with some help from a hand under the Latina's chin.

"Yeah, I'm fine… I'm good." Santana mumbled but didn't exactly have Brittany convinced with that weak statement.

"Are you sure? Brittany wanted to hear again but got nothing further out of her girlfriend. Instead Santana started pacing. She looked lost in her mind and tortured by whatever was going on inside her. Brittany knew for sure something was wrong now. She stopped Santana's nervous steps with a firm grip on her shoulders.

"Can I tell you something?" Santana blurted before letting Brittany ask what was wrong again.

"You can tell me anything." Brittany confirmed and nodded slightly.

"It's just- I don't… I don't think I can go in there if I don't tell someone about this." Santana said and looked like it was the last thing in the world she wanted to talk about. Brittany was really worried now.

"Santana, what's wrong?" Brittany asked with a hint of desperation.

"I, uh…" Santana started and her eyes flickered around the cold interior of the waiting room.

"Let's sit down." Brittany interjected and guided Santana to a chair before sitting down next to her. Santana pressed her elbows against her thighs and sat hunched over with her hands buried in her hair for a while.

Brittany waited patiently but couldn't help but stroke a comforting arm over Santana's back to get the information sooner. Maintaining her crouching position but letting her arms fall to rest on her knees and with loose wrists Santana stared at her hanging hands.

"It happened when I was kinda' new to New York. I had just turned twenty and I was still hurting from everything with Holly. Emma was away at college and I was hurt and lonely. For a while I partied a lot and uhm… I didn't mean to sleep with him. I don't know if the condom broke or if he didn't even use one…" Santana spoke quickly like she was racing with someone to get the information out there. She clenched her fists at the memory of being so stupid to let something like that happen.

"I didn't even know his name." Santana snorted.

"San, it's okay." Brittany commented to offer some comfort but Santana wasn't really open to it at the moment.

"I was so young and I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready, I mean I couldn't…" Santana started blurting the words but her voice faded out.

"I know, you didn't do anything wrong!" Brittany's voice was so gentle and warm and still filled with conviction and sureness. Santana's stare grew blank in kind but her face formed a frown.

"It was a life. A tiny little person and I killed it." Santana argued but Brittany shook her head.

"It's not really-… Abortion isn't-" The blonde began.

"I took a life." Santana interrupted and smacked her thighs in defeat while saying it.

"It's not like that, Santana. You just... you chose your life." Brittany said, speaking with the same volume as Santana but her voice was filled with love and sooth rather than the scorn that had corrupted Santana's. Santana snorted.

"How selfish is that?" Santana grunted but didn't appreciate the attention she was getting from strangers now so she lowered her voice. "You should hate me." She almost whispered. It was Brittany's turn to frown.

"Hate you? Santana I respect you. I respect you for being brave enough to make a choice like that. And I love you so much for being brave enough to talk about it." Brittany offered her hand to Santana who came diving in to it with urgency. From the pressure applied to her hand Brittany could feel the turmoil still rumbling inside Santana.

"Do you think everything happens for a reason?" Santana asked after staring at Brittany's fingers laced with hers during a long period of silence.

"I think the world is a little too cruel for someone to have thought it out to be this way but yeah, I believe fate hands us a few lemons, throws us a few curveballs and maybe nudges us in the right direction every once in a while… We just have to make the right choices." Brittany was still so calm and supportive in a way Santana hadn't expected.

"I don't feel like I deserve to be in there and hold her child… any child." Santana said, finally looking at Brittany so she could soak up all the solace Brittany's eyes offered.

"Santana, you have to go in there, Emma needs you. You're gonna be a great aunt to that little nugget... And someday you're gonna be a great mother." There wasn't a single cloud of doubt in Brittany's mind for these things to be true and it radiated in her face and her voice.

"But-"

"Don't fight me on this, just trust me." Brittany interrupted and hugged Santana's cheek with her palm. Santana nodded. She trusted Brittany. If there was one thing she never had to doubt it was Brittany.

Brittany stayed close to Santana while she changed her clothes and built up the courage to go and join Emma. The last thing Santana felt before going in that room to face her fears was Brittany's hand in hers and it made her feel safe.

Emma's face lit up when she was finally greeted with the sight of her friend. Her forehead was sweaty with strands of hair sticking to it, and the smile didn't last long before a contraction caused pain to take over Emma's face.

Noah was by Emma's right, holding her hand tight and guiding her breathing through the pain. Santana walked with shaky steps to Emma's left and grabbed a tight hold on Emma's second hand.

Through the first push Santana thought her fingers would break in Emma's tight grasp but by the next one she adjusted her hand so Emma could force as much pressure on it as she could muster up without it hurting Santana too much.

Santana felt anything but confident in what she was doing but followed Puck's lead and seemed to be easing Emma's strained mood somewhat. Santana had never realized how many encouraging words she knew and how much pain you could feel just by watching someone you care about go through it. Emma screamed in such a shattering way it hurt not only Santana's ears but her whole body and just breathing became harder.

When it was finally replaced by the whines of a baby crying Santana felt the pressure on her hand ease to the point where Emma had let go completely. The redhead stretched her arms out to Noah who was holding the little tiny bundle of wails.

"It's a boy." Noah confirmed as he looked down in complete awe of his son in his arms.

"I want to hold him." Emma said with a pleading and a longing in her voice Santana had never heard before. Noah nodded.

"Okay, let's get him cleaned up." Puck said and looked around for a nurse to hold the baby while he cut the chord so the boy could get to his mother's aching arms.

"No, I want to hold him now." Emma insisted, her already extended arms reaching even closer, driven by energy she didn't even have.

"He's a little gooey." Noah said hesitantly but started to hand the baby over to Emma.

"I don't care." She uttered as she took the little one in her arms. She finally let some muscles relax as she rested her back fully against the pillow again.

"Hi. Hello, little one." She murmured and stared down at her son. Noah proudly cut the chord with supervision from a nurse. They took the baby away from Emma to wash him but after a little while in Puck's arms he was soon returned to Emma again. Santana was looking at the little nose and the tiny lips and the chubby cheeks in awe. It was she smallest person she had ever seen.

"What's his name?" Santana asked quietly without taking her eyes off the little one.

"Nathaniel." Noah said with sparkling eyes.

"Do you wanna hold him?" Emma asked with exhaustion in her voice.

"Yeah." Santana breathed, holding back a sob.

She got the little bundle in her arms and it was so light and so heavy at the same time. She made sure she supported his head fully and then for several minutes she sat frozen, afraid to move an inch, with Nathaniel in her arms. She felt his little baby muscles stir against her and he was so warm. His eyes fluttered open every now and then, and Santana inhaled urgently each time those little dark eyes locked in hers. He was perfection.

When she grew more confident she relied on one steady arm to carry the boy and lifted the other to touch everything tiny. She beeped his nose, felt his smooth hair, stroked over his cheek. With her index finger she counted each of his fingers individually. Nathaniel's fist jerked slightly and he opened his hand, stretching out his fingers. Santana put her finger in his palm and her eyes watered as the little tiny hand clenched to it hard.

"He likes you." Emma whispered and then she drifted of to peaceful sleep.

* * *

><p><em>Yes, Santana's restaurant is called Breadstix (because San and Breadstix have a major love connection) but it doesn't look like the one on Glee. But if you want to picture that, that's fine too! Don't forget to review now ;)<em>


	27. Chapter 27

You know God hates you when yesterday our house caught fire and today we had a major power outage. Every other house on the street was fine, it was just us. Are you trying to tell me to get out of the house, God?

Apologies for the slightly poorer quality of this chapter, obviously shit has gone down. Also, I have to give a speech at school tomorrow so I should really start writing it.

**CHAPTER 27**

**"Just you and me" **

* * *

><p><strong><em>April 7th<em>**

* * *

><p>"Mercedes, just shut up, kay? You can't win this one." Santana said a little too loudly and earned a strange look from the lady next to her in the elevator.<p>

"_Bitch, please."_

"I have my own restaurant and I have Britt. You can't out-happy me. No way." Santana insisted and flashed the lady a polite smile before the old woman got off on her floor, and left Santana alone for the ride to the top.

"_Brittany? The one who's forgotten your anniversary?" _Mercedes snorted. She was not about to lose this contest.

Santana had made the mistake of telling Mercedes that it was her and Brittany's one year day today and that Brittany hadn't replied to Santana's texts or answered her call. Now Mercedes wouldn't let her hear the end of it.

"No, she didn't forget! She had a thing today and had to leave early." Santana explained for the millionth time.

"_She didn't even acknowledge it."_ Mercedes insisted. She wasn't sure whether she was mad at Brittany for being douchy to Santana or if she was still just trying to win the happiness contest.

"I haven't seen her today. She left before I woke up, so that's why." Santana defended as the elevator doors opened and she walked out to the hall while fumbling through her purse for her keys.

"_My point exactly."_ Mercedes said smugly.

"She didn't forget! Look, I'm going inside now she's probably home and waiting." Santana was getting irritated with Mercedes now. Then again, she was almost always irritated with Mercedes. She shoved the key in the hole and pushed the door open. The apartment was dark and showed no signs of Brittany being home.

"… fine, maybe she forgot." Santana admitted with a sigh and took her shoes off.

"_Told ya.'"_

"You're a bitch, M." Santana snorted and cut directly to the kitchen, putting her purse and shopping bags down on the counter.

"_Hell yeah I am. So what you gonna do now?" _Mercedes wanted to know. Santana looked at her bags.

"I bought some new lingerie today. I'll just put it on and wait for her. Maybe cook all her favorite foods." Santana pulled out the new undergarments she had bought. They were red lace because Brittany always went crazy for the red. Santana put the phone to speaker and tugged the shirt over her head and manoeuvred the bra off, replacing it with the new one.

"_Pathetic. Come over!" _Mercedes thought they might as well make the most of this night. Santana on the other hand still had her mind set on anniversary stuff.

"I'm not coming over. I'll just wait for her. It's fine." Santana said while removing her jeans and finished with a shrug she knew Mercedes couldn't see anyways.

"_Whatever, loser." _

And with that Santana hung up. '_Whatever'_ was Mercedes and Santana's good bye, it always had been. Old panties down, new ones up and then one stocking at a time travelled up her legs, all the way to her upper thigh where she secured them in the stocking suspenders.

"I'm sexy and I know it." Santana sung to herself in half a mutter when seeing her reflection in the window. But something was definitely missing. She needed heels with this.

Entering the dark living room she came to a halt by the sight of one flickering candle on the coffee table. With furrowed eyebrows and with a face of confusion Santana moved closer to see what was happening by the tiny little fired hazard.

Sitting herself down on the couch she saw the candle, a shot glass filled with what she assumed to be tequila since there was also a slice of lime and a salt shaker next to it, and an envelope reading;

_**You didn't really think I'd forgotten, did you? **_

Santana smiled and even though she was alone she felt her cheeks heat up with the slight embarrassment of actually thinking Brittany had. She opened the envelope and pulled out a note with further explanations in Brittany's handwriting.

_**A shot. Because the first time I kissed you, you tasted like tequila. Take it, and then go to where we first made sweet lady love in this  
>apartment. <strong>_

_**P.S. Blow the candle out because I know you worry about the fire hazard. **_

Santana laughed at the fact that just seconds ago she had been concerned with the safety of this. Then she poured some salt on her hand, licked it up and brought the glass to her lips. It made her warm in her stomach and caused her face to scrunch up. She exhaled from deep in her throat and then bit down hard on the slice of lime. Urgh. She filled her lungs again to blow out the candle.

The first time they had sex in this apartment was that Saturday that started at the homeless shelter. Brittany invited her in for the night - for the first time. They made it no further than to the hallway.

Santana took careful steps in the dark until another flickering light in the hallway lit her path slightly. Santana looked at the spot on the floor where they had conducted the acts of affection and a little smirk spread across her face. Brittany had been so eager and hot for Santana that night. And Santana had rocked her world.

Santana sat down on the floor and picked up the envelope. She threw a glance to the nail polish next to the candle before opening it.

_**Jungle red. Because that's the color you had the first time we held hands  
>with interlocked fingers. Paint your nails, and then go to our favorite<br>cuddle place. **_

_**P.S. Wipe that smirk off your face. **_

Santana pressed her palm against the floor next to the candle and painted nail by nail on each hand. She waited a minute or two, blowing on her fingertips, but then her excitement and curiosity grew too large and she stood up again.

Their favorite cuddle place was on the floor in the dining room. After that first time Brittany had made a temporary bed there they liked it so much they set it up when they were feeling extra snugly. Santana entered the dining room and straightened a chair that was slightly out of order around the table before making her way to the lit corner of the room. She found another candle, another envelope, and a little jar with what appeared to be a lotion of some kind.

_**Vanilla. Because mixed with Santananess that's how you smelled  
>the first time we danced with each other. Rub it on, and then find<br>where something new begun. **_

_**P.S. Thanks for straightening the chair. **_

How did she know…? Santana just shook her head at how well Brittany knew her. She opened the jar and coated two fingers in the creamy lotion. She rubbed it on her wrists and on the pulse point on her neck.

Where something new begun? She wasn't sure where that was but she went to the only place she could think of. She opened the door to the master bathroom and saw flickering lights in the bathtub where Brittany asked Santana to stay forever.

Ha! She was right. She did a little victory dance and picked up the envelope, sliding off a big, round earring resting from on top of it.

_**Gold. Because this is the earring you wore on our first date.  
>Put it on, and then go to where every good day ends. <strong>_

_**P.S. I really love your victory dance. **_

Santana's jaw dropped a little. Really, Britt knew she would do the dance? Sick. Santana went to mirror and stroked all her hair to one side, securing it with a hairpin and then she hooked the earring in her ear.

Where every good day ends – definitely bedroom! Santana skipped into the room and her eyes travelled over it and found a candle on the nightstand on her side. The nightstand was almost a little crowded with the candle, the envelope and a big shirt. Santana had no idea what to make of this one.

_**Hello kitty. Because this is the first shirt of mine you ever wore.  
>Put it on and then visit Mr. Snowman. <strong>_

_**P.S. Your hair is pretty like that. **_

Santana had made sure to not do anything other than go straight for the envelope this time but even so Brittany managed to impress.

Santana looked down and realized she was wearing nothing but the lingerie she put on earlier. Santana held the shirt out in front of her. It was white with pink three-quarter-sleeves and a big Hello Kitty on the stomach. She knew this shirt.

She put it on carefully to not mess with her hair or pull her earring. Mr. Snowman is what Brittany called the freezer. She had made a face out of refrigerator magnets and taped a bowtie to it. Santana furrowed her eyebrows but did as she was told and went back to the kitchen.

She looked at the freezer but there was nothing but the usual on there. She reached her arm out an opened it. One of the shelves had been completely cleared and a little electrical candle shimmered on it. Santana shivered at the cold and grabbed the envelope, hurrying to close the freezer door again. It was heavier than the others. She opened it and pulled out a key before reading the note.

_**The key is to my heart. Just kidding. You don't need a key because  
>it's always open for you. It's for your final destination. The roof.<br>I'll be waiting. **_

The roof? Isn't that cold? Let's face it, it's only April and it's already dark outside and everything. In the corner of her eye Santana registered more scribbles.

_**P.S. Don't worry about the cold.**_

Of course Britt had thought about that, and of course she knew Santana would too. Santana was majorly impressed with this game. Not to mention heart warmed and filled with love.

She quickly grabbed the key and made her way to the vestibule where she slipped her feet into a pair of black pumps. She exited the front door and went to the very end of the hallway and through another door to a set of stairs. Up and up and then key in the hole and turn.

Her heart was beating so fast. She needed to be with Brittany, _now_! At first she didn't see Brittany anywhere but the clicking of heels alerted the blonde of Santana's presence and she appeared with a huge smile on her face.

"Happy one year, babe." Brittany beamed with a goofy, ecstatic grin. A jolt of powerful reality went through Santana. With hurried steps she rushed over to Brittany and lifted her hands to hug the back of the blonde's neck. Santana kissed her hungrily, passionately, affectionately. Brittany was caught off guard by Santana's pleasant attack but let her arms wrap around the Latina's body.

"I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you!" Santana repeated after the kiss ended and she put her head over Brittany's shoulder and hugged her tight. Brittany almost thought she heard Santana cry against her. Santana was so overwhelmed and she didn't even have room to be embarrassed about it.

"Honey, are you okay?" Brittany asked softly and hugged the back of Santana's head with her whole hand.

"No, I'm not okay. I love you so much." Santana sniffled after lifting her head again. She looked around at the beautifully decorated roof top. There was a large sofa in one corner, a table set for two, a stereo with big speakers, a huge green plant and of course loads and loads of red roses.

"That's a good thing if you ask me." Brittany said with a gentle smile and tried to zero in on Santana's flickering eyes. Santana broke down even more.

"I _knooooooow_." Santana whined. Brittany sweetly kissed Santana's forehead several times before backing them both towards a sofa. Brittany sat down first and then pulled Santana down to sit in her lap. Santana's shoes slipped off as she lifted her feet to rest them on the cushion.

With both her arms wrapped around Santana Brittany rocked her girlfriend calmingly. Santana lifted her hand and held it over Brittany's heart to let the beats sooth her. Santana's other hand clung to Brittany's back and she buried her nose in the blonde hair.

Dressed in the Hello Kitty shirt she almost looked like a child being comforted after waking up from a nightmare. Brittany hummed a tune in Santana ear like she always did when Santana cried. She grazed her cheek against the side of Santana's face and her lips ended up just by the Latina's temple. She let them be there for a while before speaking.

"I love you so much sometimes my brain hurts when I try to make sense of it... Then I wonder why I'm trying to make sense of it, and instead I just let it be that way." Brittany said quietly with her voice filled of love and her lips moving lightly against Santana's skin. Santana withdrew her head and wiped her cheek. Brittany looked at her with big eyes that Santana couldn't get enough of staring back into.

"Why do you always panic when things are really good?" Brittany asked carefully. Santana's mouth opened a little and then closed again. Brittany waited. Santana's gaze sunk. Her head was spinning so fast to try and find an answer. She wanted to have one. She wanted to give it to Brittany.

Was it because the day she got her first bike was also the day her uncle died? Was it because the day she got her driver's licence was also the day Carmen fell off the balcony and had to spend a week in the hospital? Was it because the day she got her own apartment in New York was also the day she got mugged on the subway? Because every time something good happens, something bad follows?

Or was it something else completely? Was it that when Jacob Jewfro Israel told her he loved her she broke his heart and humiliated him in front of the whole school? Because she picked on Lauren Zizes and messed with Ken Tanaka? Because she made Matt Rutherford change schools and threw slushies on Cooter Menkins? Because she told the principle that April Rhodes was keeping booze in her locker which got her expelled and thus eliminated any competition for prom queen? That she simply didn't deserve to have things be good?

"I'm afraid." Santana whispered.

"What are you afraid of?" Brittany asked gingerly and stroked a strand of hair away from Santana's face.

"That's it's too good for me... and that it's gonna go away." Santana answered and wiped the last of her tears.

"Of course it's gonna go away." Brittany blurted with a voice sounding like she stated something obvious.

"Gee, thanks." Santana said and snorted out a sound that was half a sob, half a chuckle. Brittany shook her head.

"No, I didn't mean it like that. I didn't mean you don't deserve it baby, because you do!" She added quickly.

"I just mean we need the bad… to know when it's good." Brittany explained gently and offered Santana a tentative smile. Santana's muscles pulled at the corners of her mouth and she couldn't hold back the smile. She gave a small nod.

"When did you get so smart?"

Brittany looked down coyly, touched her forehead and smiled but she didn't answer.

"But you know what's never gonna go away, right?" Brittany cooed, still looking down, still smiling bashfully.

"What?" Santana asked with a teeny tiny wrinkle between her brows. Brittany lifted her pools of blue and locked them in Santana's brown orbs.

"Me." It was said lovingly, but so matter of factly it couldn't be doubted. Santana's lips parted as her grin grew bigger and Brittany took full advantage of it by leaning in for a kiss.

As she sucked to keep Santana's lips in contact with her own she tasted the tequila, she smelled the vanilla, in the tiny crack her eyes were still open she saw the gold earring shimmer and she felt Santana's fingers slide effortlessly between her own. In her mind she heard Santana's voice – _I love you._ One year. That's thirty-one million, five hundred and fifty-six thousand, nine hundred and twenty six seconds of loving Santana with her heart, her mind, her every sense and every fibre of her being.

"Me neither." Santana cooed, pulling away so slightly that her lips were still grazing against Brittany's as she spoke. They hovered in that spot, lips and noses lightly touching. At the same time they both drew a breath and shared the air they had warmed with their kiss. Brittany giggled and placed a peck on Santana's lips before creating space between their faces.

"You're allowed to enjoy it." Brittany cooed back. Santana pursed her lips and nodded determinedly. The trust she had for Brittany was so strong she had no other choice but to listen and believe.

Brittany giggled and tickled Santana in the side. Santana squirmed but caught Brittany's hands and wrestled her down so Santana was on top of Brittany with a firm grip around the blonde's wrists.

"How the hell did you get a sofa up here?" Santana asked suddenly and looked around like there would be some sort of a sign with the answer somewhere.

"There might have been a helicopter involved…" Brittany mumbled shyly. Santana laughed a little.

"I wanted to do something we hadn't done before but we've done so much…" Brittany started to explain. "… and I thought; _weeeell_, we haven't spent the night on a roof top so-"

"The night?" Santana interrupted questioningly.

"There might also be a bed up here…" Brittany said in the same coy tone as before but this time with a mischievous smile.

"And I have dinner prepared too. And music. And I have all these heat lamps so it shouldn't be that cold- are you cold, baby? Brittany spoke quickly and a little nervously as she began to worry that Santana didn't like it. Santana shook her head.

"No I'm not cold." She ensured and chuckled.

"You're incredible." She added with a loving smile and leaned down for another kiss. The kissed slowly but deeply and Brittany's hand slid over Santana's stockings. When her hand reached the suspenders her heart skipped a beat. She hadn't even noticed her girlfriend's sexy lingerie under the childish shirt. Brittany's thumb grazed over Santana's skin, reaching higher for her juicy butt flesh.

"Feeling frisky, are we?" Santana asked huskily at feeling Brittany's firm grip on her behind and pulled away to shoot the blonde with a smirk.

"Uh-huh! Really, really frisky." Brittany answered eagerly. Santana kissed Brittany's neck and stood up. She reached for the hem and pulled the shirt over her head. Brittany jaw fell open and she stared with big eyes.

"Drool much?" Santana joked and skipped off.

"Where are you going?" Brittany called helplessly after her.

"I'm just gonna put some music on." Santana said in a twirl to face Brittany but then continued on her way.

"How do you even-?" Santana started when she couldn't even get the thing to turn on. Suddenly Brittany was behind her.

"I'll do it." As Brittany took over Santana took a couple of steps closer to the edge. She looked out over the city. The night was dark and even though you couldn't see any stars, it was still so beautiful. All the lights created an almost magical sense of being surrounded by fireflies.

Soft music filled the air and Brittany approached Santana from behind. Brittany stared at the round butt cheeks of her girlfriend in the red lace material, which flattered them in the best way possible. She closed her open mouth and reached her hand out to touch.

"How come I've never been up here before?" Santana's question snapped Brittany out of the trance and she withdrew her hand quickly.

"Huh?"

"The view is amazing!" Santana said, momentarily turning to look at Brittany over her shoulder. Brittany's eyes, on the other hand, were focusing on something else.

"Yeah. Mine's pretty good too." She mumbled, unable to turn her gaze away from Santana. A crooked smile formed on Santana's lips before she turned around.

"C'mere." Santana mumbled and pulled Brittany closer. She nibbled on Brittany's bottom lip in a teasing kiss before releasing it to speak.

"Thank you for all of this. You always make me feel so special." Santana murmured coyly and smiled like a child on Christmas.

"Are you happy?" Brittany asked.

"Yes." Santana answered sincerely.

"Good. Me too." Brittany nodded and drew circles on Santana's stomach. Santana tilted her head to the side as she waited for Brittany to say something else, Santana could see she wanted to.

"I know I do a lot of this stuff… a lot of flashy, richy stuff…" Brittany begun with flickering eyes, but raised her gaze for the most important part.

"… so I wanted to say, uhm, so that you would know, that I don't really need any of it. Just you and me… that's all I need."


	28. Chapter 28

**TEEN LESBIANS!** (or whatever your age and orientation may be) I must have your attention for a second! I wanna do a shout out to all the wonderful people who review (let's blow 400 outta the park?) and alert and fave and talk to me in general and follow me on tumblr and come with suggestions and I'm so overwhelmed by it all! Add a Brittana kiss and... well I've already had thirty heart attacks today. The good kind though. The ones that just make you all giddy and energetic.

_JEESUUUS HOLLAAAAHHH! (In true Sugar Motta fashion I would also just like everyone to know that I worked my speech like a stripper pole!)_

**CHAPTER 28**

**"Stay with me"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>April 15th<strong>_

* * *

><p>Brittany felt her door handle. It was always better to check first than to dig deep in your pockets for your keys only to find that the door was already unlocked. The door slid open and she stepped inside. She definitely remembered locking it when she left so Santana must be home.<p>

Brittany threw a glance at the clock but in the darkness she could barely make out what time it was. That's weird. If Santana was home she should have turned the lights on. Maybe she forgot or carried a lot of stuff or something. Brittany shrugged.

Her phone started ringing and she casually answered it while walking into the kitchen for a glass of water. It was Dave, her former partner back in the days when she was a cop herself.

He talked eagerly and slightly out of breath, not even greeting her properly before diving into his topic. She listened to everything he had to say and even though she wanted to shrug that off too an unnerving feeling started to grow from her fingertips and spread throughout her body. She finished the conversation and hung up, leaving the phone in the kitchen before crossing the apartment with hurried steps.

"Santana?" Brittany called out into an empty room but got no answer.

"Santana, where are you?" She hollered and hoped that just being louder would earn an answer but she got no response.

"Santana! Dave just called, he said that Sugar has escaped from prison. It's probably nothing but maybe we should watch our-" By now Brittany had looked through most rooms and opened the door to the bedroom where she was interrupted by the sight of her girlfriend, stretched out on the bed, tied to it, wearing nothing but underwear.

"…backs." Brittany finished lower. At first seeing Santana like that had hit her with arousal, but reading the look on Santana's face now had the opposite affect.

"Santana, what's wrong?" Brittany asked gingerly but before Santana could get a chance to answer, a loud bang, from the door being slammed shut behind Brittany, filled the room. Santana flinched at the sound and Brittany turned around in a startled manner. She was met with the sight of a familiar woman and colors exploding on her retina.

"Hello… _**Brittany**_!" Sugar said spitefully and lifted her hand to make sure Brittany knew that she was currently in an inferior position. Sugar's fingers hugged tightly around a gun but her wrist hung casually like it could just as well have been a phone or a coat hanger. Brittany froze in her position on the floor. Sugar gave off a mocking laugh, pleased with the blonde's frightened reaction.

"Hi, Sugar…" Brittany said hesitantly and almost lifted her hand to wave but caught it with her other hand before she actually did.

"Could you untie my girlfriend, please?" Brittany asked and tried to sound polite and kind, her eyes glancing over to Santana and then back to Sugar in a pleading frown.

"What, I don't get a kiss?" Sugar asked, and though her voice sounded offended, her face sported a triumphant smirk. She moved closer to Brittany, her hips attempting to sway seductively but failing miserably. She stopped dangerously close and lifted herself up on her toes, getting ready to steal that kiss.

"Don't touch her! Don't you dare touch her!" Santana yelled from her position on the bed, stealing the attention of both other girls. Sugar stopped but didn't wipe the smirk off her face; she seemed to be all too pleased with herself.

"Feisty one, this one." Sugar said, addressing Brittany and nodding her head in Santana's direction even though it was fairly obvious who she was referring to.

"She's been feeding me insults all afternoon, despite my best efforts to shut her up." Sugar continued, now moving away from Brittany and closer to Santana.

"What did you do to her?" Brittany said, her eyes darkening with anger at the very idea of someone coming into their home and hurting Santana. She barely had time to finish her question before Sugar stroked a finger over Santana's lip, making the Latina shrug back in pain.

Sugar looked at her finger, now colored red from blood, and then took it in her mouth and sucked it clean. Brittany looked at Santana's face and saw that her lip was broken and she also had a cut on her cheek. Brittany then looked at Sugar and noticed that her neck was slightly bruised, she had a bite mark on her hand and scratch marks on her chest. Looks like Santana put up a fight, but Brittany was still furious.

"I just showed her that _you don't mess with Sugar Motta_."

"Are you okay, baby?" Brittany asked, completely ignoring Sugar's remark and looking straight at Santana.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Santana answered with a nod and darted her tongue out to run it over her bleeding lip.

"_**I said;**_ I just showed her that _you don't mess with Sugar Motta!"_ Sugar repeated, now irritated from not stirring up more fear in her attempt to sound bad ass.

"Oh yeah? Or what?" Brittany shot back. The sudden outburst aggravated Sugar even more.

"I'll show you what!" Sugar answered and lifted her hand. With a straight arm she pointed the gun in Santana's face and moved a finger to the trigger. Brittany eyes went wide in fear. She threw her hands over her mouth and shook her head.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Don't- Sugar, I'm sorry! Put it down!" Brittany blurted and gestured with her hands for Sugar to put the gun down.

"That's right,_ bitch_! I'm in charge here!" Sugar said and directed the gun at Brittany instead. A few times before in her life, Brittany had been face to face with the barrel of a gun, but this was the first time she felt relieved with that. At least now it wasn't on Santana.

"I'm gonna need you to cuff yourself to that chair. Hands behind your back." Sugar demanded and let the gun flicker to point at the cuffs, then the chair, and then back at Brittany. Sugar inspected carefully as Brittany sat down and brought the ratchet around one of her wrists, bringing her arms to behind her back before locking the other ratchet around her other wrist.

She tugged on it to prove to Sugar that her hands were in fact locked to the back of the chair. Sugar smirked for a second. Brittany leaned back in the chair and felt the backrest a little loose. This was the chair that broke when Santana and Brittany played hot lava the other week. This could be good…-

"Now, how about that kiss?" Sugar said and moved her face closer to Brittany's. Brittany turned her face away from Sugar so she couldn't press her lips against the blonde's. Instead of fighting for Brittany to pucker up Sugar stuck her tongue out and licked Brittany's jaw line, following it all the way to the blonde's ear.

"I'm gonna kill you!" Santana shrieked and the whole bed shook as she tried to loosen herself from the ties.

"_Actually,_ it's the other way around." Sugar corrected and stood up straight again. She walked over to the bed and sat down in, playing with the gun along Santana's curves. Brittany squealed with dread when she saw it. Her mind was racing but there wasn't much she could to.

"I can see why you love her." Sugar said monotonously as if speaking to an empty room. A sadness crossed her face but she forced it away. She turned her face to Brittany in one fast motion.

"Because you do love her, right?" She asked with urgency, like the answer had to come fast.

"Sugar, I'm so sorry-" Brittany began.

"_**Right?" **_Sugar shrieked. She needed the answer almost as much as she needed it not to be true.

"Yes. Yes, I love her very much." Brittany said matter of factly and threw worried glances to Santana's face.

"_I love you too." _Santana whispered in a moment when hers and Brittany's eyes were locked in each other.

"Good. I've had a lot of time to think lately… _prison_ _does that_… and I was trying to think of ways to hurt you… Honestly I just came here to kill you J-bird, but seeing your little lover-friend strut around in the nude gave me another idea." Sugar said with a hint of spite lingering in her voice.

"Sugar, don't hurt her! I'm begging you… don't hurt her!" Brittany's voice echoed with helplessness as she could think of no ways out if this.

"Look officer-" Sugar was about to explain exactly why she had to kill Santana but Brittany cut her off.

"I'm not a cop anymore." Brittany blurted with some hope shining through. "Just... let us go and I won't tell anyone you were here, I promise!"

"Yeah, 'cause I'm gonna trust **_you_**?" Sugar snorted.

"Please…" Brittany begged. Sugar looked into her blue eyes and remembered all the reasons she loved Brittany. She needed to hurry up with this shit before the blonde would start to get to her. She already felt tears burning every time she closed her eyes.

"I'm not playing here!" Sugar screamed violently and stood up, stomping her foot against the floor like a stubborn child.

Sugar pressed the gun against the Latina's stomach, digging it deep into her flesh. Santana didn't even flinch at the cold barrel or at the murderous affects it could have. She seemed not to be bothered at all by the fact that her life could end any second.

Brittany, on the other hand, was a nervous wreck. She was the one who was supposed to be used to these kinds of things but to be honest she had never really gotten used to the whole gun thing. She wasn't comfortable having such power over life in her hands. Nor was she comfortable, far from it actually, with someone threatening the life of her girlfriend.

"Any last words?" Sugar asked Santana with a smirk and raised her eyebrows as she waited for an answer she couldn't care less about.

"If you hurt Brittany so help you God-" Santana began. She didn't care if she died now; if Sugar laid so much as a hand on Brittany she could drag her ass back from the dead and haunt the crap out of Sugar until that psychotic bitch wished she had never set foot on this planet.

But Santana didn't get a chance to finish before the bedroom door flung open and then everything went too fast. Dave barged in and tackled Sugar to the floor, pinning her tiny body under his own heavy one, but before he had a chance to knock Sugar over, the startled fugitive flinched and pulled the trigger, unleashing a bang louder and scarier than anything Brittany had ever heard before.

Screams filled the room and drowned out the sound of everything else. Sugar's screams were hysterical and high-pitched as she struggled under the heavy-weight on top of her. Dave's screams were more agonized grunts in reaction to Sugar digging her teeth into his flesh.

Santana screamed in frightened pain from the bullet having ripped through her insides and Brittany screamed in sheer panic when she saw the dark red blood pulsate out of her girlfriend, rippling down her side and staining the snow white sheets under her.

Brittany shot to her feet, lifting the chair with her as she stood since her hands were still tied to it. She knocked it against the wall, over and over and over again. She felt a sharp pain in her wrist as it bent in a way it wasn't supposed to but she didn't stop.

She banged the chair against the wall until it had broken to pieces, freeing her hands behind her back. In a not so graceful, but nevertheless quick, maneuver Brittany stepped over her hands to move them to her front. They were still locked together but they were not hindered by anything else.

She rushed to Santana, jumping on the bed and sitting straddling over Santana, she grabbed the closest covers and pressed it against the Latina's wounded stomach to stop the bleeding. One of her hands proved completely useless but she didn't even reflect over it.

She watched as the sheet drenched and the blood seeped up between her fingers, covering more and more of her hands. Brittany grabbed more fabric and pressed it harder down on Santana. Santana squealed in agony and her gaze was beginning to drift off from loss of the vital fluids.

Tears dripped off the blonde's face in her desperate attempts to heal her girlfriend but she ignored the stinging in her eyes, and despite her blurry vision she saw everything more clearly than she would have liked to. She had never been more afraid in her entire life. The pain in her heart couldn't be described by any words available to man.

She grunted to Dave to call 911 and with him having successfully managed to control Sugar by now, with cuffs around her wrists and a knee on her back, pinning her to the floor, he obliged in the blink of an eye.

Santana felt dizzy, everything was spinning and the room was getting darker.

"Britt…" Santana uttered in barely a whisper, the side of her face turning from resting on the pillow to lock her eyes in Brittany's as she spoke.

"I'm here, baby. I'm here." Brittany cried and nodded and shook her head at the same time. She didn't know what to do with herself. She tried to smile to offer Santana some comfort but the overwhelming feeling of helplessness made it almost impossible. Santana's blinks were getting slower and more effortful as it was becoming harder for her to put energy into opening them after each time she let them sink shut.

"I'm sorry…" Santana murmured as her lids became too heavy and her eyes sealed.

Brittany sobbed and shook her head violently. Strands of blonde covered her sight and she hurriedly lifted her hands to wipe it out of her face, smearing blood on her cheeks and forehead and tainting strands of blonde with the redness.

Her hands quickly returned to Santana to press against the wound again. When Santana's eyes didn't open Brittany applied more pressure to Santana's now limp body but she got no reaction. Brittany's functioning hand grew more desperate and she shook Santana furiously, earning nothing but a quiet grunt from the Latina.

"Come on, baby! Stay with me, _please,_ stay with me!"


	29. Chapter 29

I have never been happier about people saying they hate me, lol. OVER 400! YOU DID IT, LEPRECHAUNS! (or whatever mythological and/or magical creature you wish to be referred to as) You are all incredible! But you don't really hate me, right?

**CHAPTER 29**

"**Die at the same time"**

Brittany paced back and forth in the waiting room. Karofsky sat on a chair with his face buried in his hands and waited too. He had brought Sugar to the station but then he hurried back to the hospital to be there for Santana, but mostly for Brittany. Emma had rushed here too, leaving Nathaniel with Noah. Quinn and Rachel were on their way. Mercedes was out of town and Kurt couldn't be reached.

Brittany had called the Lopezes but she hadn't been able to make sense of her words so she had handed the phone to Emma for her to explain instead.

Brittany had so much nervous energy she couldn't be still. With every step she felt a pulsating pain run through her wrist. She had broken it when she slammed the chair against the wall.

When coming to the hospital in the ambulance Santana had been unconscious and they hurried her away from Brittany. Brittany was taken for x-rays and then someone put a cast on her wrist as she nervously fidgeted, eager to get information on Santana.

When Brittany was finally done she rushed to the waiting area in the part of the hospital she was told Santana would be brought to. She was also told to sit tight. That was four hours ago. She had been walking around in this wound up state of her world collapsing for four torturous hours.

In a way, the pain she felt in her wrist was comforting. It was the only thing she could count on right now. Step. Pain. Step. Pain.

Every time she saw a doctor she attacked them with questions about Santana. She harassed the reception and every nurse who came within ten feet of her, but no one would tell her anything. Her mind was racing and it wasn't making any sense. None of it. When her eyes were open the whiteness of the hospital was too bright. When she closed them it was too dark. She had a lump in her throat that wouldn't go away no matter how much she swallowed and she half expected her legs to fail her any second.

Dave reached his hand out and grabbed Brittany when she walked within his rage. He stood up and put his burly arms around her.

"I'm so sorry! I'm so, so sorry! I shouldn't have barged in like that!" His voice was weak and on the verge of breaking as he clung to her like a child.

"You saved our lives." Brittany murmured against his shirt, on the very edge of tears herself. They both sought comfort in each other and despite both of them aiming for taking; they were both also giving.

"This is all my fault." Brittany sniffled, shaking her head against Dave's shoulder.

"I should have just snuck up on her quietly…" Dave whispered, staring at the wall behind Brittany.

"It's nobody's fault." Emma interjected with sureness. Her face was emanating something else, though. Something more uncertain. She was rubbing a toothbrush of the armrest with fast strokes that seemed to speed up by the second. Everyone was on the edge of their seats and not knowing what was happening was slowly driving everyone insane.

Brittany felt the urge to argue with Emma's statement but held it back. She pulled away from Dave's hug and started pacing again. She couldn't be still for too long, it was physically impossible. Every five seconds she glanced up at the clock and every time it had never been more than those five seconds. How could time move so incredibly slowly? How could a second be so long? Brittany leaned against a wall and sunk down to sit on the floor even though several chairs were open.

"_She has to be okay. She has to be okay. She just has to._" She mumbled over and over again, trying to convince herself that if she said it enough it would become true. When the silhouette of a man in white robe grew bigger with each step he took down the hallway Brittany shot to her feet again. She hurried over to him.

"Is she okay? Is Santana okay?" Brittany asked and grabbed the doctor by the wrist.

"Excuse me miss…" He answered and squirmed out of her grip. "…but I don't know who that is." He continued and turned his back to Brittany to talk to a nurse.

Usually she would have been upset that he was being so rude but now she was really only upset about still not having any answers. _She has to be okay. She has to be okay. She just has to. _Brittany repeated in her mind and backed away from the unhelpful doctor.

"Ms. Pierce?" A female voice said behind her. Startled, Brittany hurriedly turned around and zeroed in on the person who was trying to get her attention.

"Is she okay?" Brittany blurted as if on auto-pilot and eagerly waited for a yes.

"Ms. Lopez is stable. She's lost a lot of blood but she's a fighter. Obviously we'll keep her here for a while, but so far there seems to be no major complications." The doctor said, her words sounding formal but her eyes radiating pity in response to Brittany's tortured ones.

"Can I see her?" Brittany's voice was frail, almost too weak to come out.

"It's immediate family only…" The woman said hesitantly and squirmed uncomfortably as she watched Brittany's shoulders and facial features sink in hopeless despair.

"Please?" Brittany begged.

"I-"

"Her family lives in Ohio. Please don't make her wake up alone." Brittany pleaded and the uncertain frown on the doctor's face smoothed out as she gave one, every so slight, nod. She walked by Brittany's side, guiding the blonde, to the room where Santana was still sedated. It couldn't have been much more than 30 feet but it was the longest walk in the history of the world.

"It could take a while before she returns to consciousness and even when she does, she'll be very tired." The doctor informed gently before opening the door for Brittany.

"I just wanna hold her hand." Brittany murmured, not sure if the doctor even heard her. She stepped inside and approached Santana's hospital bed with slow steps.

Santana looked like sleeping beauty. She was on her back; Santana never sleeps on her back. Her legs were straight; Santana never sleeps with straight legs. Her arms rested along her sides and her hair framed her face and contrasted against the white pillow.

She looked almost lifeless and the thought terrified Brittany to the point where tears started streaming down her face again. For a while she just stood there and cried. She sniffled and calmed herself, comforted by the small heaves of Santana's chest as she breathed.

"_Hi._" Brittany whispered and dragged a chair closer to the bed to sit down by it.

With her butt on the seat she felt like she was too far away so she stood up again, leaning over Santana. Brittany kissed her cheek. Then her other cheek. Then her forehead and her nose and her chin and each eyelid gingerly.

She looked at the cut on Santana's bottom lip and then she leaned down and kissed her lips, feeling the plump softness mold together with hers perfectly even when unconscious. She kissed each of Santana's fingertips and placed one kiss in each palm.

Brittany let her own fingertips trail up Santana's arms, shoulders and neck. She followed Santana's jaw line and traced the features in her face until she was certain she knew them by heart. Not until Brittany was completely sure that she knew, and could recognize every little detail of Santana, could the blonde relax enough to take a seat on the chair again.

She took Santana's hand, holding it between both her own and then she just watched. It was the most intense thing she had ever seen and she stared, afraid to even blink for second, determined to not miss the exact moment of Santana's awakening. Because she would wake up. She was stable so she would definitely wake up. Any second now…

The seconds didn't pass slowly anymore. Nor did they pass fast. Time didn't even seem to exist. Brittany had no idea how much time had passed, she was completely fixed on Santana. Noting every rise of Santana's chest as she breathed, noting every tiny twitch of Santana's eyelids as she dreamed, and noting no change…

Brittany just sat and held Santana's hand. It had been dark outside when Brittany came into the room but now rays of morning light pierced through the window. Brittany wasn't hungry or thirsty; she barely even felt her own body.

The only times she left Santana's side was to go to the bathroom and she always hurried back, hoping that maybe the pot would have started boiling when she wasn't watching, but Santana was still deep in slumber after every return.

Nurses came and went. Doctors looked at her file, scrunched their noses and left. Emma popped her head in, announcing that she was going home to feed Nathaniel but that she wanted a call if there were any changes. Dave popped his head in to let Brittany know he had to go to work but he would return immediately after his shift. Quinn and Rachel tried to make contact with Brittany but couldn't get a single word out of her.

It all went by in a blur; their voices were just murmur that Brittany didn't really listen to. Their shapes were just hazy silhouettes that Brittany didn't focus on. Without Santana the world was nothing but a blur.

It was getting dark again already but Brittany was still by Santana's side. She was feeling her body getting heavier and her eyes more tired but she pushed it away. She also tried to push away the nervous fear caused by Santana still not opening her eyes, but the hope she had felt twenty-four hours ago was burning out.

"Hey…" Emma's voice said softly, trying to not startle the blonde with her presence.

"I brought you back a sandwich and a soda… you should eat something, Brittany." Emma continued when she wasn't greeted back and put the snacks on the table next to Santana's bed. She put one hand on Brittany's shoulder and hugged it tight for some consolation.

Emma was freaking out inside but she pulled herself together. She felt she needed to be strong for Brittany. With a couple more pained glances at Santana and a few more squeezes on Brittany shoulders Emma got ready to exit again.

"What's happening? Why won't she wake up?" Brittany asked quietly. It had been so long since she last spoke that at first she didn't even recognize her own weak voice. The questions stopped Emma on her way to the door. She sighed deeply.

"I don't know, sweetheart." Emma said gently and walked around the bed to the opposite side of the one Brittany was sitting on. Brittany lifted her gaze and actually looked at something other than Santana for the first time in over a day. Emma's golden brown eyes didn't offer as much comfort as Emma wanted them to, since they were on the verge of tears, but she smiled faintly at the blonde.

"Doesn't she know how much I miss her?" Brittany asked, not sure of whom she was asking.

"She knows." Emma ensured with a nod and pursed her lips to stop herself from crying.

"She needs to come back. I need her to come back to me." Brittany said running her hands through her hair in frustration and leaning back in the chair with a thud. Emma flinched at the sound and wiped one hand under her eye.

"I know. She will…" Emma wasn't sure how convincing her voice was anymore and she put her hand over mouth and sobbed into it quietly. She sniffled and composed herself.

"I'll go talk to a doctor." Emma said quietly and hurried out of the room with fast steps. Brittany turned her head back to Santana. She was still not awake. Brittany looked at the sandwich and then she grabbed it. Her stomach was growling by now. When removing the saran wrap she noticed how shaky her hands were.

She chewed the bread and gulped the soda all the while still staring at Santana. Feeling full, Brittany got even more tired and rested her head against the bed, squishing the side of her face slightly.

"_Wake up, wake up, wake up." _She mumbled stubbornly while drifting off to sleep herself. Brittany didn't even realize she was sleeping because she was dreaming about reality. Her dream looked just like the room she was sleeping in and Santana looked exactly the same as she had for hour after hour now. A second in the dream was a second in reality.

Then Brittany awoke with a startle, and her heart skipped a beat as she felt a hand stroke away hair from her face. Her eyes shot open and she was met the brown orbs she never wanted to go a day without seeing _ever_ again.

"Scared ya." Santana said in an attempt to joke and drew a lazy smile. Brittany started to cry.

"You did, you really did. Oh my God, I was so worried. Don't ever do that again. I was so scared you wouldn't wake up. I can't live without you, please Santana, don't do that ever, ever, ever never again…-" Brittany pleaded with big crocodile tears streaming down her cheeks, and Santana focused her energy to form worried frown. She needed to comfort her girlfriend. With great effort she lifted to hand to hug Brittany's cheek but with Brittany having lifted her head she was too far away.

"Shh, baby. I'm sorry. C'mere." Santana said gingerly. Brittany dove her face closer and let Santana support her heavy hand against her cheek.

"C'mere, c'mere, c'mere." Santana repeated and drew Brittany's face closer until their lips touched. Brittany kissed them hurriedly, like it was her last chance, all the while her salty tears were dripping on Santana's face.

"I'm so sorry." Santana murmured against Brittany's lips. She knew she couldn't really help it, but she still felt terrible about scaring Brittany like that. Brittany shook her head in the kiss to let Santana know she had nothing to feel guilty about.

"It's all my fault." Brittany argued, lifting her hands to touch Santana's face to make sure she was real.

"It's not your fault." Santana ensured but this time Brittany couldn't help but protest.

"I'm the one who got involved with Sugar. I'm the one who pissed her off. I'm the one she wanted to hurt. I'm the one who should be in this bed." Brittany blurted and her stomach ached just thinking about her role in this.

"Do you know how happy I am that you're not in this bed right now?" Santana asked and raised her eyebrows.

"It's not funny, Santana-"

"I'm not kidding! I don't know what I would have done if she had gotten you instead…" Santana said and had tears building up in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Santana. I'm so sorry."

"Brittany, look at me." Santana said and her eyes flickered as she tried to capture Brittany's blue eyes with her stare.

"I'm fine!" She said, but it came out a little too loudly, making her abs attempt to tighten and Santana winced and the pain it caused even through the painkillers.

Brittany's eyes shot to Santana's stomach and the Latina received a worried frown since her body screamed the opposite of her words. She tugged on Brittany's cheek, forcing the blonde to look in her eyes again.

"I'm fine." She said again, this time not letting anything interfere with her sureness.

"Are you sure?" Brittany asked gingerly and Santana nodded and smiled warmly. Brittany sat herself down in the chair and stared blankly.

"_You're fine. You're fine. It's gonna be fine."_ Brittany murmured softly, not sure if she was trying to convince herself, or Santana, or the world.

"Get off that stupid chair." Santana said firmly. Brittany looked at her with questioning, hesitant eyes. Santana wanted to scoot over to give Brittany more room but she didn't have that much energy, nor was she sure it could be done without hurting so she just tapped the mattress to signal for Brittany to lie next to her. She needed Brittany close.

Still looking hesitant, Brittany climbed on the bed. She was pretty sure she would get scolded if a nurse came in, but she wanted nothing more than to feel Santana's warm body press against her. Brittany was super gentle as she rested her body on the mattress. She inspected Santana's face to see if she caused any pain and she was careful to not put pressure on, or even at all touch, Santana's stomach. Slowly, she lowered her arm to drape it over Santana's hips.

"Is this okay?" Brittany asked softly.

"That's perfect." Santana answered and kissed the top of Brittany's head. They took a moment to just be. Santana felt a little light headed and her eyes were heavy.

"I'm gonna go back to sleep now." Santana whispered quietly, half hoping Brittany had already fallen asleep. Brittany lifted her head.

"Oh, do you need me to-"

"Please stay." Santana interrupted and Brittany immediately obliged and rested her head on Santana's shoulder again.

"We're gonna grow old together." Brittany said matter of factly.

"And die at the same time." Santana filled in.

"I really, really love you, San." Brittany murmured, finally feeling the relief of having Santana back again.

"I know, B. I really, really love you too."

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><p>A pinch of credit must be given to the song <em>To Lose My Life<em> by _White Lies._


	30. Chapter 30

I had the weirdest bug just now this weekend. I woke up with like worst cold ever on Friday and today I'm almost fully restored. I am _convinced _it was all your sweet and loving words that healed me, so obviously I owe you big time!

Filler-ish...

**CHAPTER 30**

**"Hollering, healing and heroes"**

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><p><em><strong>May 14th<strong>_

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><p>"No, babe, I got it." Santana said stubbornly and reached up to grab the plates from the cupboard. She didn't even make it half way to the shelf before she had to admit the defeat and bring her arms back down. Stretching out her upper body was still really painful. The doctors said that, best case scenario; it would take about three to six months to fully return to normal.<p>

Santana had spent two weeks in the hospital, and she had been home with Brittany for another two. She sighed. Weeks go by slowly when you're crippled. She had to depend on Brittany for almost everything and it was really beginning to bother Santana to be so needy.

Brittany reached for the plates and took them down. She gave Santana that look; that look filled with sympathy, and then she walked through the doorway to the dining room to set them out on the table. She proceeded to get glasses but when she went back for cutlery, Santana had already taken it from the drawer and made her way to place it next to the plates.

"I can do it." Brittany offered and reached out to take the forks and knives from Santana. Santana shrugged back in an irritated manner.

"Just let me do _something_!" Santana snapped and walked past the blonde, threw the silverware on the table and sunk down in a chair, burying her face in her hands with her elbows on the table.

"San…" Brittany said softly. When Santana lifted her gaze the blonde still had that look. Santana hated that look. She just wanted it to go away.

"No, B! Stop looking at me like that!" Santana screamed. She didn't know why she was so sensitive today, some days were just worse than others. She knew that Brittany only meant well and wanted to make things easier for Santana but she still couldn't help how she felt.

"I'm just trying to help." Brittany said with the same gentleness in her voice and pleaded with her eyes for Santana to calm down. But Santana didn't want help; she just wanted to take care of herself.

"I'm not a fucking child!" Santana hollered. She got up from her chair and walked out of the room. Brittany remained in her spot and sighed. She couldn't figure out what she kept doing wrong.

She served her own meal and the special diet food Santana had to eat at the moment.

"Dinner's ready." Brittany cooed in the doorway from the dining room to the living room. Santana sat on the couch, hugging a pillow in her lap, and stared ahead blankly.

"Are you coming?" Brittany asked carefully when Santana didn't say anything.

"I'm not hungry." Santana muttered, barely loud enough for Brittany to hear her. Brittany sighed again but left Santana on the couch.

She ate her dinner alone. Just from how the silverware clinked against the plate Santana could hear how sad Brittany was, and it made her feel even shittier. She hugged the pillow tighter.

When Brittany was finished she walked back to Santana and sat down next to her on the couch. In response Santana stood up and went to the dining room to eat alone.

"Santana, please…" Brittany said after her but Santana just ignored it. She knew she was being unfair; she just needed to get away from those eyes. Her whole body was itching for independence again.

She poked her food with her fork. She felt like it was mocking her and she scrunched her nose at it in response. She sat there by the table for over an hour and even so she couldn't get the whole meal down.

She cleared the table and even though it was such a boring task; doing it herself made it feel great. She even did the dishes by hand despite the dishwasher not even being close to full and she wiped the table and every surface she suspected needed cleaning. Afterwards she felt a lot better.

She peeked out to living room and saw Brittany sleeping on the couch, balled up, almost in foetal position. As Santana came closer she could see the crying lines across the blonde's face and it made her heart ache. With some effort she got down on her knees and kissed Brittany's forehead.

"_I'm so sorry, Brittany."_ She whispered and stroked her thumb over a blonde eyebrow. Then she got up again and walked into the bedroom. She was still healing and she needed to change patches over her wound. She took out all the stuff from her drawer in the nightstand and soaked a cotton pad in alcohol. She reached for the hem off her tank top and attempted to pull it up over her head.

"Aow, fuck!" She gritted between her teeth and as she let her arms fall again, she kicked the nightstand lightly. Even without very much force the bang helped rid her of some frustration.

She was just about to try taking her shirt off again when she felt lips against her shoulder blade, just slightly above where her tank top ended. They moved a little higher for one more kiss and again a little higher.

"Please, let me do it." Brittany murmured against her skin and Santana sighed in defeat. She nodded gently and felt Brittany's fingertips graze along her hips and waist to find where Santana had left the hem of her top. Santana lifted her arms to where it was just on the verge of painful as Brittany, with some effort, manoeuvred the top off.

Santana got on the bed. Brittany crawled after her on her knees and stopped when she was so close her kneecaps grazed against Santana's side. Santana handed her the alcohol-drenched cotton pad but Brittany put it down on Santana's stomach to remove the patch first.

She used both her hands and lifted the gluey edges as gently as she could. The one of Brittany's hands that was still in a cast felt raspy against Santana's stomach and Santana looked down at it. It had scribbles all over it after one night when Santana got a little carried away with the black marker. Santana had to admit she would miss it a little when Brittany would get to remove her cast in two weeks time. Santana smiled and Brittany glanced up at Santana and offered a faint smile in return.

"It looks pretty good, San. I don't think we have to do this much longer." Brittany said and looked back at the wound. It wasn't really a wound anymore; it was beginning to shift into a scar. It was about two inches long, located to the right of Santana's bellybutton.

Santana had been really lucky. The bullet hadn't damaged too much since it went straight through and it hadn't hit anything vital. Santana flinched a little when Brittany started to clean around it but it was from the cold rather than the burning sting she had felt in the beginning.

When Brittany was done with the cotton pad Brittany took a moment to just stroke around the area with her thumb. She put on a new patch and grazed her fingers over that too.

"Okay, turn around." Brittany said gently and Santana slowly rolled over to lie on her stomach. She dug her hands into the mattress to relieve her abdomen of some pressure as she waited for Brittany to do her back as well.

The mark on Santana's back was smaller and her skin was completely healed closed. The bullet had exited through there but the doctors hadn't opened it up to operate like they had in the front. They didn't really need to clean it or even have a band-aid on it anymore but Brittany had wanted to be on the safe side, so she had insisted.

She tugged the band-aid off and looked at the little scar, no longer than an inch. She gently rubbed a cotton pad over it a couple of times but she didn't put a new patch on there. Instead she leaned down and kissed over it, deciding that one kiss wasn't enough so she gave two.

"That's all healed up." Brittany beamed and let her hand run to Santana's side to let the Latina know she could turn around again. Santana squirmed around and looked Brittany in the eyes.

"_Thank you._" Santana whispered softly and let her fingers play around the edge of the patch on her stomach. Brittany lay down on her back next to Santana and decided to ignore the little tension still lingering between them. Instead she rolled to her side and pressed her lips right on the bend where Santana's shoulder extend to her arm. Santana cocked her head to rest it on top of Brittany's.

"I'm sorry I screamed at you." Santana cooed. Brittany lifted her hand and let her fingers dance around the patch with Santana's.

"It's okay." Brittany answered lovingly.

"No, it's not." Santana argued. "You're not doing anything wrong."

Brittany smiled at hearing that. Santana felt the smile against her skin and kissed the top of Brittany's head. Their fingertips grazed against each other by mistake once but after it happened; Santana made it happen again.

She let the tips of all her digits meet Brittany's and their hands hovered in the air, touching just like that. Santana pressed her palm flat against Brittany's and the blonde applied pressure in return, locking it in place. Their hands were almost exactly the same size but Brittany's fingers peeked up slightly higher than Santana's. Even without lacing their fingers together it was a match. Santana watched it intently but couldn't think of anything to say.

"You don't have to be so strong all the time, you know." Brittany said and broke the silence. Santana felt her throat dry a little.

She knew she could be vulnerable around Brittany. She didn't even mind it; it was one of the things about the blonde that Santana had noticed very early on. With Brittany she could feel so totally exposed and incredibly safe at the same time. That wasn't the problem.

She let her hand fall again.

"I know… but I can't be weak all the time either." Santana wasn't sure she was making sense, in her head she kind of understood what she meant but she didn't know how to convey it with words. Brittany's silence let her know that the blonde didn't really understand so she took a deep breath to try and clarify further.

"I just… I feel so pathetic when I can't even set a freakin' table." Santana explained and sighed at how pitiful she sounded.

"But you can set a table!" Brittany protested. "You just can't set it _right now_..." She continued with a kind smile.

"What if I need to be able to set it _right now_?" Santana asked and the frown on Brittany's face let her know that Brittany was even more confused now. Santana sighed again.

"What if Sugar comes back and I can't protect you?" Santana murmured quietly with coyness and reservation emanating from her face. The pieces fell into place for Brittany who had to smile at the sweet tenderness of Santana wanting to protect her at all costs.

"You already took a bullet… don't you think that's enough protection for one lifetime?" Brittany joked with a playful smile. Santana had to chuckle. It hurt a little and she hugged over her abdomen with her hand. Brittany saw the hint of pain and stroked over Santana's stomach too.

"I'm serious, B. If she ever hurts you-"

"She's not coming back, San. We're safe now." Brittany spoke lovingly and with conviction. Of course she couldn't be one hundred percent sure, but she was relatively certain that they would never have to see Sugar again.

"You can't be sure…" Santana pouted, but felt a lot better inside. Brittany kissed Santana's collar bone, her neck and finally her lips. Santana hummed in approval and kissed her back, placing a hand on the back of Brittany's head to keep her in place.

"Is this why you don't sleep at night?" Brittany asked out of the blue after nuzzling up in the crook of Santana's neck. Santana tensed up a little again, she thought they were done talking about this.

"How do you know I don-"

"I know how it feels when you sleep." Brittany interrupted and lifted her head again.

"I can't sleep if you don't sleep." She continued bashfully and played coyly with a strand of Santana's dark hair.

"Do you have nightmares?" Brittany asked gingerly when Santana still didn't talk. She rested her head on the pillow.

"No, it's not that." Santana ensured and shook her head.

"Then what it is?" Brittany wanted to know, and her curiosity spilled out over her gentle voice.

"Some nights it's just hard to relax." Santana said and shrugged her shoulders casually. She knew Brittany wouldn't leave it at that but she could always give it a shot.

"Why?" Just like Santana suspected Brittany persisted on, and Santana had to smile at the adorable eagerness that was the blonde's interest in Santana.

"If I see some creep out on the street or if I hear a noise at night it's just hard to shut that out, ya' know? I never realized how dangerous the world could be…" Santana started softly and rolled over to her side to be able to look into Brittany's eyes and stroke over the blonde's cheek with ease.

"I _just_ need to keep you safe." Santana said, speaking firmly and hugging Brittany's cheek more snugly after she finished her sentence.

Brittany squiggled her body closer and tangled her legs with Santana's. She let one hand rest on Santana's hip as she leaned in and kissed the woman who cared more about her than anyone had ever done before.

They kissed for minutes. Gentle, soft kisses so charged with all the love and emotion that could possibly fit into that room. It was so quiet that every time their lip syncing made a noise Brittany couldn't help but smile playfully at it and Santana couldn't help but smile back at Brittany's charming giggles.

Worries fell off the face of the earth as they shifted closer and closer, not breaking away from the sweet kisses. Santana felt her eyes get heavier and her calm breathing soothed Brittany to the point where the blonde felt herself dozing off too.

They both relaxed the weight of their heads and just let them rest on the pillow with their noses grazing against each other. The air they breathed was warm and humid. It was marked by the other and they both felt the serene tranquillity of it as they caught up on some much needed rest.

"San?" Brittany mumbled quietly before completely giving into the sandman.

"Hmm?" Santana hummed in response, only half awake.

"You're my hero."


	31. Chapter 31

This one is honour of a certain anon from Tumblr. You know who you are, you dirty, dirty bastard. Lol, just kidding! But it is for you. The plot can wait, lol.

**CHAPTER 31**

**"When spoken to"**

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><p><em><strong>July 18th<strong>_

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><p>Santana zipped her outfit up and looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. Then she looked at the time. Brittany would be coming home any second now. Stupid support group retreat stealing Brittany away for a whole week. Santana put her heels on and shook her hair to give it a messy look.<p>

While glossing up her lips she heard the front door slam shut. Pretty soon she heard steps down the hall and Brittany entering the bedroom. Santana opened the connecting door a tiny crack and peeked out. Brittany was bent over, pulling her jeans down her legs.

"Well, well, well…" Santana crooned teasingly.

"Hi, baby. I didn't think you were home." Brittany cooed back without turning around to look at Santana as she let her shirt fall to the floor too. Santana didn't answer but just stood still the doorway.

"I missed you so m-" As Brittany finally turned around, and was met with the sight of her girlfriend, she choked on her words and her jaw dropped. Santana was wearing a strap and sleeveless, otherwise full body, latex suit. Her toned arms hung casually along her sides and her frizzy hair rested lazily on her naked shoulders.

One strand of the dark hair was teasingly playing over her eye and stuck to her glossy red lips. She had on those heels Brittany thought were the absolutely sexiest shoes in the world and she screamed sex with every breath. Santana smirked at Brittany's facial expression and started walking towards her.

"What about your stomach?" Brittany wondered worriedly.

"No talking." Santana said firmly.

"But what if you get hu-?"

"_Shhh_." Santana interrupted and put a finger over her mouth. Despite her slow steps she was rapidly closing in on the half naked blonde.

"But, San, I don't wan-" Brittany persisted while reaching her hand out to place it lovingly over Santana's belly. Santana smacked the hand away.

"I said be quiet, bitch." Santana froze at her own words and was ready to apologize at the smallest reaction, but Brittany just moaned out in response and tilted her head back and slightly to the side. Santana brought her face closer to Brittany and let her bottom lip fold as she drew it up over the skin on Brittany's neck.

"You will speak… when spoken to." Santana said huskily into Brittany's ear and it blew a puff of air into it with every syllable.

"_Fu-"_ Brittany began but quickly caught it in her throat upon realizing that she was saying it out loud when she wasn't supposed to. She drew it back in and tried to keep her breathing steady. She was anything but successful and the winds of air almost jerked out of her as she filled with excitement, anticipation and arousal. Santana ran her index finger up the length of Brittany's arm and hooked it in her bra strap.

"Will you do exactly as I say?" Santana asked firmly and held her finger in place as she waited for an answer. Afraid to speak, Brittany nodded in response.

"Say it." Santana ordered and the nail of her middle finger rasped against Brittany's skin as it moved to join the index finger.

"I'll do exactly as you say." Brittany whispered and watched the black strap as it fell off her shoulder per request of Santana's will.

"Hmm?" Santana hummed questioningly and tilted her head, squinting her eyes slightly as she waited for the words again.

"I'll do exactly as you say." Brittany repeated louder and barely recognized her own voice so coated with desire.

"Good girl." Santana nodded and drew her whole hand over Brittany's chest and in under the black strap on Brittany's second shoulder, making it lose its grip too.

"Are you gonna let me do all the work?" Santana questioned with a raised eyebrow and crossed her arms over her chest while staring at Brittany's breasts and the cups of material covering them.

Almost as if startled Brittany's hands flew to her own back and she unclasped the bra and tugged it off her arms. It all went very quickly and Santana smirked at Brittany's eagerness. With Brittany's chest exposed, and her nipples already stiff even without being touched, Santana took a step closer.

Keeping her breath close to Brittany's lips Santana let the back of her hand run ever so softly up over Brittany's stomach, making it automatically suck in at the teasing touch. She grazed over Brittany's ribs and underboob.

With her fingers a little parted she let a pink nipple silently thrum on them, almost like playing the guiro. Brittany gasped for air repeatedly, barely giving herself a chance to exhale before the next finger hit her sensitive nipple and forced her to draw another desperate breath.

Suddenly Santana's soft touched changed and she took Brittany's full breast in her hand and kneaded. Brittany was not prepared and couldn't stop the groan she let out in reaction.

"You want me to fuck you, don't you?" Santana asked, not letting her own arousal shine through in her voice.

"_Yeah…_" Was all Brittany could breathe out, accompanied by an eager nod.

"Good girls say please." Santana stated firmly and let her arm fall, thus stopping the kneading on Brittany's fleshy breast. Brittany filled up with something similar to despair at the loss of sensational pressure on her bosom.

"Please." She said quickly and desperately. "Please, Santana! Fuck me really hard."

With a firm grip on Brittany's hips Santana turned the blonde around violently and pressed the backside of Brittany's body against herself. With her fists clenching Brittany's thong Santana brought her lips to the blonde's shoulder blades. Instead of the soft kisses Santana usually placed there the Latina opened her mouth and nibbled, taking the delicious flesh between her teeth and biting down lightly.

Brittany brought a hand all the way to Santana's back and pressed herself even closer to her girlfriend, feeling the mounds of Santana's breasts crush against her back. Brittany's other hand went to hug one of Santana's fists but wasn't allowed to hold on for very long before the Latina pulled the underwear down Brittany's legs and brought them up in her hand after Brittany had stepped out of them.

She looked at them and another smirk grew in her face as she saw the soiled piece of tiny fabric. Brittany looked over her shoulder in an attempt to find out why Santana wasn't touching her anymore, but before her eyes got a chance to register anything she was pushed forward and onto the bed.

She landed on it with her stomach against the mattress but Santana spun her around before she could do it herself. Santana parted Brittany's legs, forcing them widely apart while taking in the sight of the blonde's wet sex. Santana placed a couple of soft kisses along the inside of Brittany's thigh. Then she backed up again, leaving a panting Brittany confused and feeling vulnerable in the compromising position.

"Touch yourself." Santana ordered and licked her lips in anticipation. Brittany lifted her head slightly and looked down over her stomach.

"But-" The blonde started but interrupted herself immediately due to the stern look on Santana's face.

"Touch. Yourself." Santana said again, even more domineering.

One of Brittany's hands clenched the sheet under her, while the other hesitantly ran down her stomach. She stopped for a second when she reached her mound and closed her eyes.

Slowly, her fingers travelled down her slit and parted her inner lips. She felt her wet warmth on her fingers and she almost felt a little embarrassed about how soaking she was. Brittany flicked gently over her clit and her hips bucked up a little in reaction. God, she was so sensitive.

Brittany's heart was beating really hard like it was trying to burst out of her chest. She could hear Santana try to drown out a moan as two fingers effortlessly disappeared inside her. It had Brittany feeling a little more confident and her next thrust went deeper. She even picked up the pace a little.

With her eyes shut tight she couldn't see Santana, but she knew the Latina was in the room and that she was watching. It made Brittany even more aroused and she gave in to the pleasure her own fingers were giving her. She became louder, her legs couldn't possibly part further but yet somehow they did, and her chest heaved.

She felt like she was just about to burst when a hand wrapped around her wrist and stopped her motioning. Her head jerked up and her eyes flew open. She was met with Santana bent over the edge of the bed with her upper body hovering between Brittany's thighs. Brittany gave her a questioning look that asked why Santana had made her stop.

"I get to decide when you cum." Santana explained with a mischievous grin and the words had Brittany's body quivering.

Santana toyed with her tongue out on the very fingertips of the digits Brittany had used to fuck herself with. Brittany swallowed hard at seeing the small licks Santana's tongue made. When Santana had cleaned up she threw Brittany's hand aside and leaned down. Without sweet kisses as warning she began tonguing Brittany and tasting everything there was to drink up. She thrust her tongue as deep inside Brittany as it would go and lapped up a mouthful of lady juices.

In that moment Santana lost control of herself.

"_Fuck, you taste good."_ She breathed out without really being aware of doing so. She climbed up on the bed and threw herself down on Brittany. Her full lips dove to Brittany's thinner ones and she immediately demanded for her tongue to get full access. Brittany didn't protest but moaned with need upon tasting herself on Santana.

Santana pulled away teasingly and Brittany's head automatically lifted off the mattress to follow, and commence the kissing again. With her mouth slightly open she reached to take one of Santana's lips between her teeth. Santana dodged and Brittany let her head fall again in defeat. Her eyes were pleading for Santana to give her more.

Santana leaned down again, darting her tongue out and flicking over Brittany's upper lip. Brittany's tongue mimicked Santana's motion in an attempt to make the two tongues collide. It turned into a game, enjoyed briefly, before Santana grabbed the back of Brittany's neck and forced her up and into more hungry kissing.

Sounds from deep down in Brittany escaped her and mixed with the wet kiss as Brittany rolled her hips up against Santana who let one hand claw its way down Brittany's side. Santana let it follow Brittany's curves and then travel out on her thigh as far as it could reach before bringing the leg in to wrap around the Latina.

The heel of Brittany's foot rested in the arch of Santana's back and her calf rode up the Latina's back, resulting in the blonde's leg being hiked up to the point where her own knee was playing against her nipple. The position opened her sex wide for Santana and Brittany's hips bucked again, trying to find some kind of friction.

"_Mmhhrrmmmmmm_." Brittany grunted and bit her lip when Santana's hand finally made its way to cup her sex. Santana's immediately plunged two fingers inside Brittany, pumping in and out of her fast.

It wasn't about teasing. It was about showing Brittany that Santana wasn't fragile anymore, and more than anything it was about fucking Brittany senseless, because Santana couldn't get enough of the blonde's moans and trembles.

Brittany wanted to grab onto the headboard but since they were sideways on the bed her hand didn't hit anything, but just continued backwards until she filled a fist with the bedcovers instead. Holding on there made her upper body stretch out and her back arched slightly.

Brittany's palm trailed up Santana's back, and feeling the latex material she couldn't decide if it was the sexiest thing ever, or if she wanted it the fuck off to feel Santana's skin.

One of Santana's hands found its way into Brittany's hair and she tugged on it, making Brittany's head tilt and causing more of her neck to become exposed. Brittany grunted in reaction but couldn't for the life of her define if it was from pain or pleasure. The vicious attack on the blonde's neck left several marks and Santana eyed them in approval before moving her lips lower.

Santana licked her way down to Brittany's breast and took in a mouthful of the flesh. She sucked and ran her tongue flat over the stiff nub. A deep breath filled Brittany's lungs and pressed her chest even harder up on Santana who hummed in desperate delight. Something else desperate were Santana's thrusts inside Brittany. They were fast and borderlining violent.

Letting her hand slip out of the blonde strands of hair, Santana used it to support herself more sturdily and thus making her able to throw her whole body into the vigorous motions her arm was caught up in. She added a third finger and pretty soon the whole bed was shaking.

Brittany's breasts jiggled with every hard push inside her sex. Each time Santana's last knuckles made contact with her; Brittany let out an _uh_. Every new _uh_ louder and needier than the last. Santana looked down at Brittany's face. Brittany's eyes were closed and her face scrunched up in anticipation of her orgasm about to flood over her any moment.

"_Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh_."

"Look at me." Santana order and Brittany's eyes snapped open, her face straightened to align with Santana's, and her pools of blue invited Santana in. She couldn't close her mouth though; she needed it to keep breathing.

"Who do you belong to?" Santana asked firmly with her dark orbs trying to stay locked in Brittany's even through the rocking of their fucking.

"You." Brittany's voice came out like a quiet squeal and it wasn't enough.

"Who?" Santana asked again.

"You. Santan-_uuuuuuh_. YouSantana_Santanaaaah_." Brittany chanted until Santana's upper palm pressed against the blonde's clit and a monumental wave of pleasure shot through her entire body, making her shudder uncontrollably. Even through it; Brittany's eyes remained fixed on Santana, but after a while she let them fall shut in exhaustion as her breath tried to stabilize.

Santana smiled and leaned down to kiss Brittany's collarbone softly. Her fingers stayed inside Brittany, though, and she made little 'come-here' motions over Brittany's almond shaped rough spot. Brittany could still feel the aftershocks pulsate through her whole body, with extra hard beats going through her engorged sex and her body quivered with each wave as she let her leg slide off Santana's back and rest on the mattress instead.

The blonde's jaw fell open to take in more air, when her pussy began tightening around Santana's fingers in a twitch-like manner that Brittany didn't seem to be able to control. In reaction Santana massaged Brittany's special place with more pressure and settled her knees between Brittany's widespread legs. Santana kissed her way down the blonde's toned stomach and the tight latex suit creaked quietly as the back of her thighs folded over her calves and her stomach bent over her thighs.

Brittany felt a hand run along the inside of her thigh, and she knew exactly what Santana was doing.

"No, Santana, please, no, I ca-_uuuuuuuuuuuaaaaagh._" Brittany's begging turned into a hopelessly loud moan as Santana flicked firmly over Brittany's swollen clit and immediately threw her over the edge again. Brittany had no more air to moan out of her lungs but the second peak wouldn't pass. It was a strange feeling. She arched off the bed, lifting almost her entire back in the bend, and it was like a pushing explosion rather than a tightening implosion. _Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my GOD!_

Suddenly Santana felt a spurt hit her wrist and then Brittany's whole body collapsed. Santana's tongue froze where it had been playing with Brittany's belly button. She sat up straight and looked down between Brittany's legs where her fingers were still inside the blonde.

She watched for a second as the thin fluid trickled down her wrist and followed the lines in her palm. She slowly withdrew from Brittany and brought her arm up. She tasted it with the tip of her tongue and ran it along her palate to spread it in her mouth. It was different from how she knew her fingers would taste if she took those in her mouth. The flavour was really delicate, almost sweet, and she brought an open mouth over her wrist to drink more of it. She swallowed hard.

"Have you ever-? 'Cause I-I-I don't remember that happening before..." Santana said and shook her head with closed eyes as she stuttered out the words. Brittany was still panting through her open mouth with her tongue toying against the inside of her bottom lip.

"No." She breathed out, still exhausted with her back flat against the mattress.

"Was it good?" Santana asked with furrowed eyebrows. Brittany didn't even know how to form words to answer that question. What just happened was the most amazing thing she had ever felt. She nodded quickly.

Brittany could see that Santana's mind was spinning so she sat up too. The sheet was a little wet just under where her sex had been and it was starting to make Brittany feel slightly uneasy. She shifted her whole position to sit on her knees like Santana. She reached for a pillow and held it her lap, which hid both her lower and upper lady parts.

Santana stared at the stain.

Brittany stared at the stain.

The only sounds in the room were both girls still breathing rather heavily, and Brittany thought the silence had never been louder.

"Britt…" Santana began. Brittany closed her eyes and got ready to apologize.

"I'm so turned on right now." The Latina continued, her voice raspy and her eyes burning with desire. Brittany lifted her gaze in a matter of milliseconds at the surprising reaction.

"Yeah?" She uttered questioningly with a hint of amusement in her voice.

"Get this off me!" Santana demanded and turned her back to Brittany, sliding her hair aside, to signal for the blonde to unzip the tight latex garment. Brittany opened the long zipper that ran all the way down to just above Santana's ass. She tugged it down and then Santana shifted to lie on her back so Brittany could pull it down her legs. Santana spread her legs for Brittany, who smiled crookedly at seeing that Santana was telling the truth about her arousal.

"What do you want me to-" Brittany started to ask.

"I don't care! Just fuck me now."


	32. Chapter 32

****I'm having the worst day. I'm so sad. Like a sad little panda.

**CHAPTER 32**

**"Here we are"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>August 15th<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Hey, babe?" Santana asked Brittany as she entered the dining room where Brittany was having a breakfast croissant.<p>

"Yeah." Brittany answered simply after she had swallowed the bite in her mouth and eyed her girlfriend in approval when she saw that Santana was only wearing a sports bra and boy shorts.

"Hi." Santana greeted and nibbled a corner of the croissant. Brittany grabbed her by the arm and pulled the Latina into her lap.

"Hello." Brittany leered seductively and raised her eyebrows as an invite for Santana to give her some lovin'. Santana purred in consent and wrapped her arms around Brittany's neck.

"Oh, you have a crumb… here, let me… Mmmmh." Santana hummed as she sucked Brittany's bottom lip into her mouth, toying her tongue over it in a way that tickled and made the blonde really giddy.

Brittany let her hand glide up Santana's thigh as she kissed the Latina back with passion. Her hand continued up Santana's hip and stopped at the side of Santana's bellybutton. Brittany could feel the scar under her thumb as she stroked over the area. Obviously Brittany wasn't very fond of why Santana had it, but she had come to find the scar really sexy. Embarrassingly so.

Santana moved her lips, placing little kisses all the way from the blonde's ear to her collarbone and then she pulled away.

"What are you doing on Monday?" Santana asked with one eyebrow higher than the other.

"Nothing, why?"

"Can I borrow you that day?" Santana asked with some mystery creeping into her voice.

"I'm yours any day, everyday. What's up?" Brittany tried to sound casual but she was intrigued and curious with what Santana had planned.

"Not gonna tell you…" Santana said and sounded down right inscrutable.

"Okay… what should I wear?" Brittany asked a little stumped.

"Anything you like." Santana answered casually.

"How long will I be wearing it?" Brittany joked and wiggled her eyebrows playfully.

"_Shameless…"_ Santana murmured while nuzzling up in the crook of Brittany's neck, thinking it was time to get her mack on. Brittany hadn't fully satisfied her curiosity though.

"Should I bring something?" The blonde persisted but automatically tilted her head slightly to the side upon feeling Santana's sweet lady kisses.

"Just that smile I love so much." Santana cooed without raising her lips from the blonde's skin.

"But is th-" Subconsciously Brittany's hold over Santana's scar tightened and the Latina could feel Brittany being a little worried.

"B, stop worrying. I have everything under control!"

* * *

><p><strong>August 17th<strong>

* * *

><p>"Is everything under control?"<p>

"_Totally hooked you up." _

"Thank you so much, Puck. I really appreciate it!"

"_No probs." _Pause_ "Hey, are you doing what I think you're doing?" _

"Yeah, probably."

"_San, that's awesome! I'm happy for you!" _

"Me too. Have an awesome anniversary tomorrow."

* * *

><p><strong>August 18th<strong>

* * *

><p>Monday came around and Brittany felt skittish from the second she woke up. She tried to get Santana slip up and spill the surprise but she had no luck.<p>

In the afternoon Santana disappeared for a little while but when she returned back to the apartment she was already dressed and dolled up. Black pants, stiletto heels, and a really cute blouse, topped off with a snug, sexy blazer. Her hair was loose with pretty locks, her lips looked delicious and her eyes were smokey.

Brittany got really excited from seeing her and fixed herself up fast to get the show on the road.

Brittany had no idea where she was being taken as Santana drove farther and farther away from the city in Santana's new car, which she had bought herself and was particularly proud of. They parked outside what looked like a huge warehouse and Santana dragged Brittany inside with the blonde still not knowing where the hell they were going.

"Where are we going?" Brittany asked eagerly as both girls' heels clicked against the stone floor with every step down the long hallway.

"You'll see…" Santana said mysteriously.

"Santana…?"

"What, I thought you liked surprises, B?" Santana chirped with a smirk and threw a glance over her shoulder to look at the blonde she was dragging behind her.

"I know but…-"

"You'll like this one! I hope…" Santana beamed and shot Brittany with a coy smile. She tightened her grip on the blonde's hand and walked faster through the fluorescent lit hallway.

They stopped in front of a huge door which slid open sideways and Santana had to use her whole body to get it open. It hurt her stomach a tiny little pinch but she didn't let that shine through in her face.

Then she took Brittany's hand again and guided her to the middle of the huge room. It was completely empty and their steps echoed against the stone floor. Brittany thought it looked like a manufacturing plant of some sort, but like someone had removed all the machines and stuff. There was one bulb hanging alone in the middle of the room that was otherwise was pretty dark and the further in they got, the harder it was to make out where the room begun and ended.

When they had reached the very center, which took a while because it was truly an enormous room, Santana stopped and Brittany mimicked.

"Well, here we are." Santana said and Brittany could tell that the Latina was getting really excited. Brittany didn't really see why though, and frowned as she looked around in the dark room.

"San, there's nothing here...?"

"Exactly! It's just you and me." Santana's smile beamed at Brittany as she said it, and the words had Brittany wipe the frown off her face and replace it with a huge grin.

"I, uh… you did a really amazing job with our one year anniversary, and well do you remember why you wanted that particular date?" Santana stuttered out. She had rehearsed this in her head a million times but the butterflies in her stomach rumbled around and messed up her words.

"Of course! First time you told me you love me." Brittany said with ease, smiling at Santana, smiling at the memory, smiling at life when she thought about the simple fact that she was loved by the woman she cared the most about in the whole wide world.

"Right. Do you know what today is?" Santana asked hesitantly. Brittany shrugged and shook her head.

"Surprise Monday?" She guessed with a playful smile.

"It's August 18th. The _two _year anniversary of _you_ telling _me_ you love me." Santana said and stroked her palms against her thighs. They were getting clammy from the nerves eating at Santana. Santana smiled a little. Back then it hadn't been the best of days to be honest, but it was still magical in that sense.

"San?" Brittany asked since she noticed Santana drifting off and brought the Latina back to reality.

"We've been through a lot and it's been pretty crammed with ups and downs, I know that, but because or in spite all of that, and even with getting shot and stuff, it's been the best time of my life – because I spent it with you… I don't how it took me this long to do this but, uh…" With nervous facial features and a hesitant glance around the room, Santana got down on one knee.

As Brittany's eyes widened she saw even more clearly the little velvet box Santana pulled out of her blazer. Brittany soon realized the full scale of what was happening and she couldn't gold back a happy squeal and with a hand over her mouth she nodded. It was already an eager nod yes but Santana took it as a nod to continue because she wanted to say more.

"Brittany, I love you so much. When I look into your eyes I know, all of me knows, my mind knows, and my heart knows, and my arms and legs, even my toes know that I can't live without you…." Santana said with an unsteady voice and trembling hands to match. Then she looked up at Brittany and saw the happy tears in her blue eyes and the warmth in her beautiful face. Santana forgot everything she had rehearsed earlier but it didn't even matter.

"I mean, I love you, and I love you, and love everything you've done for me and everything you do for me every day… You healed me." Santana said, still nervously but with the most loving tone. Brittany had healed her. Santana had been so broken before this beautiful blonde came in to her life and now, here, with Brittany, in an empty warehouse she had never felt more complete.

"…And I'm pretty sure you've ruined me for anyone else." Santana added jokingly which earned a chuckle from Brittany. Santana opened the box slowly, giving the ring inside one final look before presenting it to Brittany.

"Brittany - will you marry me?"

"YesIwillyesIwillyesyesIwill!" Brittany dove down and had to control her energy to not knock Santana over as she threw her arms around the Latina.

"_Oh, thank God._" Santana breathed and laughed into the embrace. Nothing was funny really, but the happiness she felt could best be described by laughter and she couldn't stop it from flooding over.

Brittany's hands clung to Santana's back and her lips pressed against caramel skin on Santana's cheek, her neck and her collarbone but there was something Santana was itching to do. She put her hand on Brittany's left arm and pulled the blonde away with that grip. Her hand followed Brittany's arm down until her fingers met Brittany's.

In her happy frenzy it wasn't until just then Brittany realized what Santana was doing. Brittany had herself completely forgotten that part in the overly enthusiastic bliss. She held her hand out with straight fingers and refrained from bobbing up and down in zeal as she watched Santana slowly take the ring out of the box and bring it closer to her finger.

It slid on with ease and it fitted perfectly. Santana had made damn sure it would! The finger researched she had put into this was unbelievable. Stealing, aka borrowing without asking, other rings the blonde had, measuring her finger when she was sleeping, taking a picture of it and asking the jeweller…

"It's so perfect, San." Brittany beamed and even when Santana leaned in and started kissing her, the blonde didn't close her eyes, but continued to look at the rock on her finger. Brittany suddenly felt Santana fumble around between them again as Santana reached in her blazer for a second time. Brittany pulled away and looked at Santana questioningly as the Latina pulled out a little devise with buttons on it.

"Push the yellow one." Santana said and held it out in her flat palm. Brittany didn't know what was happening but pressing unknown buttons was always fun so she obliged. Instantly the room became a shade lighter as a corner of it lit up in a beautiful romantic glow and it revealed a set table for two that had before been invisible.

"What's this?" Brittany asked curiosuly as they stood up off the floor and Santana started leading her to the table.

"I do have dinner for us too." Santana answered and watched the overjoyed blonde as Brittany looked at the decorated corner. Other than the light strands and the table; it also had flowers and rose petals on the floor and cute pictures of Santana and Brittany on the wall. Brittany eyed the scenery in awe as Santana opened a bottle of the same champagne as the one they had on their first date. The bang startled Brittany a little.

"That reminds me… press the pink one." Santana said and gave the remote thingy to Brittany before pouring the champagne. Brittany pushed it and another bang echoed and released confetti which rained over them. Brittany clapped her hands in excitement as she watched the colours sink to the floor.

"What happens if I press this one?" Brittany asked and loved her magic devise, so full of surprises.

"I think that's the-" Santana started answering but was interrupted when Brittany pressed it and soft music started playing.

"…music." She finished with a skew smile at Brittany's eagerness.

"What about this one?" Brittany asked with more excitement.

"See now _that_, is the kissing button. Every time you push that one I'm gonna kiss you." Santana said amorously and put the bottle of champagne down and leaned in and stole a kiss from Brittany's lips. Brittany giggled. That button was officially her favorite.

"This is…" Brittany started but in her state of awe her voice faded as she drew a deep breath.

"I would never just give you an empty room." Santana said bashfully and handed on the of flutes to Brittany and raised her own.

"I thought you gave me you." Brittany smiled before clunking her glass against Santana's.

"Ahh, but you've always had me, Britt."


	33. Chapter 33

I'm so late with this update! I'm sorry! I was watching the Swedish Song Contest so... that's a valid excuse!

HAPPY PANDAS AND DANCING ORANGUTANS TODAY!

**CHAPTER 33**

**"Engaged"**

* * *

><p><em> <strong>August 27th<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Oh look." Santana chirped, standing in the doorway to the kitchen and seeing Brittany by the sink.<p>

"What?" Brittany said curiously and looked around over her shoulders to find what it was Santana was referring to.

"It's _my fiancée_ doing dishes." Santana said happily and walked up to next to Brittany, watching what Brittany's glove covered hands were doing.

"Where?" Brittany joked and turned the water off and slipped her hands out of the yellow rubber gloves.

"Dork." Santana chuckled out and slapped Brittany's ass playfully. Brittany dried her hands on a kitchen towel but dropped it.

"Oh look, it's _my fiancée_ bending down to pick up the towel." Santana said, once again emphasizing the fiancée part. Brittany gave a skew smile and wrapped her arms around Santana's neck, kissing her sweetly.

"Mmm, _my fiancée_ has delicious lips." Santana cooed, pulling away slightly. She couldn't believe how much she loved saying it and how easily it rolled off the tongue. It was so right. Brittany snorted, a little amused, but secretly loving being called that.

"Has anyone ever told you that _you're_ a dork?" Brittany asked jokingly but kissed Santana again instead of waiting for an answer.

"How about you and I pop in some Sweet Valley High, and get our cuddle on?" Santana proposed with suggestively raised eyebrows.

"Mmmm." Brittany nodded slowly in obvious consent. She kissed Santana with both her hands on the back of Santana's neck, and continued the slow nodding.

"I just have one more pot to clean." Brittany interjected and put on the gloves again.

"I'll go light some candles and slip into something more comfortable…" Santana said and walked out of the kitchen, wiggling her hips exaggeratedly. Once she was in the hallway she dropped the sexy act and hurried her steps. She was eager. She couldn't believe her sexual drive since the engagement started. They were going at it like rabbits.

Santana stripped down of her clothes and put on a see-trough, black nightgown. She took out some extra candles and searched the room for a lighter or some matches. She couldn't find them in any of the usual places. She scrunched her nose in confusion as she tried to figure out where they could be. She was pretty sure Brittany used them last.

"Hey Britt! Have you seen the matches?" She called out, plopping her head out of the bedroom doorway to make Brittany hear her better.

"Look in my nightstand." Brittany called back casually. Then an alarm went off in Brittany's mind. There was a reason Santana wasn't supposed to look in her nightstand. Brittany knew there was something. What was it? Her mind ached from trying to figure it out. _Oh no._

Brittany dropped the pot in the water-filled sink and left the soapy gloves on in her hurry to stop Santana.

"No, San, wait! Don't look in my nightstand! Don't look, don't lo-" Brittany rushed through the apartment and found Santana sitting on the bed fidgeting with something.

"…ok" She finished in defeat, knowing what it was Santana had found. Santana raised her gaze and looked at Brittany's nervous face and her hands in the dishing gloves covered in white soapy bubbles. Santana's eyes and brows questioned the little velvet box she had found in the blonde's nightstand.

"Did… did someone else ask you to marry them?" Santana asked with scepticism, looking at the little box like it was poisonous.

"What? No." Brittany asked confused at how Santana could jump to that conclusion.

"Then why…?" Santana began her question but couldn't find words to fully form it. Brittany took off the gloves and let them fall to the floor. She crawled up on the bed and walked on her knees on it until she had Santana's hips between her thighs and Santana's back against her front. She wrapped her arms around Santana and put her hands over the Latina's which were holding the little box.

"It's for you, silly." Brittany said quietly and coyly with her lips right by Santana's ear. Santana's breath hitched in her throat. Brittany's fingers gripped around the velvet box and lifted the top part. Santana could feel the blonde's heartbeat against her back. Brittany was really nervous showing this to Santana and the box was so heavy and took forever to open. Inside was a silver band with a beautiful white diamond. It was modest but respectable in size. Simple and classy but really gorgeous.

"It's really beautiful, Britt." Santana said in awe of the ring that was the most perfect ring she could have ever imagined for herself.

"You like it?" Brittany asked bashfully and Santana could hear the excited, huge smile on Brittany's lips.

"Yes." She answered matter of factly and quickly lifted her hand to wipe away a tear that had found its way down her cheek.

"Good. I couldn't find anything as beautiful as you though." Brittany said with a little giggle. She knew it was cheesy but it was really true. It had taken so long to find something that would even remotely do Santana justice. Now the simplicity of it did seem kind of perfect.

Brittany took the ring between her fingers and threw the box away. Santana chuckled nervously and hesitantly lifted her left hand. Santana's heart sped up. This was nerve wracking on a whole new level. Brittany spun it between her fingers a little longer, sensing Santana's anticipation and deliberately teased her. She brought it around Santana's fingertip and Santana held her breath as Brittany slid it on.

"How long have you had it?" Santana managed to ask after the initial awe moment had passed. Brittany tensed up.

"I… don't be mad." Brittany said hesitantly and nuzzled herself in the crook of Santana's neck as she waited for a promise that didn't come. She sighed quietly.

"I've had it since your birthday…" Brittany admitted and placed soft kisses on Santana's shoulder, trying to act like she wasn't at all nervous about Santana's reaction to this.

"My birthday's February." Santana stated with furrowed eyebrows.

"I know." Brittany said gently.

"Why didn't you ask me?" Santana wanted to know. She wasn't mad. She just wanted to know.

"It was never perfect enough…" Brittany sighed. Ever since New Years Eve she had had it on her mind and it hadn't taken long before she had gone out and got the ring. Then she just had to wait for _that _moment but the longer she waited the more perfect she needed it to be.

Brittany traced nervous circles on Santana's hip and Santana had to smile at Brittany's adorableness.

"Brittany." She said lovingly, tilting her head and turning it slightly to look at Brittany.

"But I wanted to, like every single day." Brittany added quickly with a peck on Santana's lips. Santana squiggled around to sit on the bed and face Brittany instead of having her legs hang of the edge. She interlocked the fingers of her left hand with Brittany's left hand and looked at both the rings next to each other.

"I'm kinda happy I beat you to it." Santana confessed shyly.

"Me too."

"But I'm kinda happy you wanted to." Santana added and smiled playfully.

"You're so cute." Brittany blurted and giggled at Santana's amazing smile beaming at her like that. There was a moment of silence and Brittany soon noticed Santana's eyes were fixed on her lips so she licked them slowly.

"You're really sexy." Santana breathed through her hypnosis. Brittany cocked her head in an amused manner and then she reached down for the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head. She stood off the bed and removed her pants too. Santana stared in complete awe of the beauty in front of her. When Brittany was completely naked she joined Santana on the bed again.

Santana looked down at herself and then she undressed herself just the way Brittany had. They looked at each other. Just watched each other breathe for minutes of silence. Brittany put her and ring finger over Santana's heart and Santana mimicked over Brittany's. It was so naked and vulnerable and yet so safe. Their promise to spend the rest of their lives together was more apparent than ever and almost overwhelming.

"I love you." Brittany said gently, letting her hand slide higher to hug the back of Santana's neck.

"I love you too." Santana said back and finished by invitingly parting her lips. Brittany lunged into a deep kiss and gently lay Santana down on the bed, not letting her head hit the pillow too hard. Brittany stroked her lips over Santana's neck and collarbone, kissing her way down on the olive skin.

"Hey San. I have an idea…" Brittany suddenly chirped and peeked up from where she had settled between the Latina's breast, kissing and sucking at the flesh. Santana lifted her head slightly to look at Brittany to let the blonde know she had Santana's attention.

"Uh-huh, what?" Santana panted and hoped with all her might that Brittany had some wickedly awesome sex idea in mind. Brittany flicked her tongue over Santana's dark nipple one more time before speaking again and it took everything Santana had not to be devoured by the sensation and instead keep listening.

"What if we don't have sex again till our wedding night?" Brittany suggested without really stopping what she was doing with Santana's lady lumps, because they were really hypnotizing toys. Santana froze for a second.

"When is our wedding night again?" She asked and if it weren't for Brittany pushing down on her she would have raised herself up on her elbows. She knew the answer; she just wanted Brittany to hear how crazy she sounded.

"In six months." Brittany answered casually.

"No, we're not doing that." Santana decided determinedly and ran a hand through Brittany's hair, urging her to continue her assault on the Latina's breasts, but instead Brittany stopped and crawled higher on Santana's body to have the two be face to face.

"But I want it to be really special…" Brittany pouted and Santana drew a breath to not give in too easily to Brittany's charms.

"It's always special with you, B." Santana cooed lovingly and saw the blonde struggle to keep her pout from becoming a smile.

"But I want it to be like extra, extra super special." Brittany murmured.

"Well, I can't very well give you that if I've died from sexual frustration." Santana joked with a crooked smile.

"Saaaan?" Brittany whined but before she knew it the Latina had flipped them over and nibbled by Brittany's ear. Santana had to pull out all the stops for this one.

"_So, you don't want me to do this for six months_?" She whispered huskily and played with her fingertips over Brittany's most ticklish place right under her ribs, making Brittany quiver. She kissed Brittany's pulse point, knowing it would make the blonde moan. She kneaded one of Brittany's breasts firmly, knowing that the left one was slightly more sensitive than the right and making the pleasured girl under her unable to control her hands from pressing Santana closer.

Santana moved her hands and parted Brittany's legs, using flat palms because the blonde preferred that over just fingertips. She let her upper thigh press against Brittany's naked sex and knew the blonde would go crazy for slow, firm movements. Santana worked all of Brittany's favourite and most sensitive parts until the blonde was a trembling, moaning mess. She finally snaked her hand down to Brittany's throbbing center and let her thumb play with the gushing wetness. When she had Brittany grunting for more she stopped her hand right over Brittany's entrance.

"Guess we're not doing this for six months…" She teased and withdrew her hand slowly, feeling Brittany's fingernails dig into her back in reaction.

"Don't you dare." Brittany warned with her voice raspy and desperate. Santana smirked and slid down Brittany's body, having Brittany first fearing she was really stopping, but then letting her tongue find the blonde's clit and earning a delighted squeal from Brittany.

Brittany bent her knees and parted her legs even wider, much to Santana's appreciation. Brittany flung one arm over her face as the other reached her hand down to bury her fingers in locks of dark hair, all the while unable to stop her hips from bucking against Santana's face.

With her shoulders under Brittany's thighs Santana reached around them to hold Brittany down with one hand on each hipbone as her tongue continued its circular motions. Santana's heartbeat increased, she could never get used to the exhilarating feeling of being down here or how much she loved it. She swirled her tongue around, drinking everything she could lap up, dipping inside, running her tongue flat over the slit, flicking, sucking and kissing.

When she felt Brittany's finger nails rasp against her scalp and the blonde's abs tighten she pressed her face closer down on Brittany, sucking the blonde's clit into her mouth and tonguing it hard. Brittany exploded all over Santana face and screamed out while doing it, trying to muffle herself with her arm but being anything but successful.

Santana kept placing soft, gentle kisses on and around Brittany's sweet sex while she waited for the blonde's heavy breathing to calm down.

"_I love cumming in your mouth." _Brittany wheezed and tugged on Santana for the Latina to come up. Santana hummed smugly while kissing her way up on Brittany's gorgeous body.

"Six months is a _long_ time, B." Santana stated, hoping her little demonstration of what Brittany would be missing had done the trick.

"I know… but then it'll be six months more sp-" Brittany began, her mind still set on holding off on the lady love making despite knowing what a challenge it would be for Santana and herself.

"Tell you what!" Santana interrupted. "Let's compromise. We could not have sex for saaay… a week? Before the wedding." Santana suggested and tilted her head. Brittany scrunched her nose.

"Four months." The blonde suggested.

"Two weeks."

"Three months."

"Three weeks."

"Two months."

"_One_ month."

"Deal!" Brittany exclaimed and smiled widely.

"I'm gonna die." Santana muttered and rolled off Brittany, a little irritated with what she had just let herself agree to. I mean look at Brittany. How could she not… for a whole month? Brittany rolled over to lie of her side and supported her head with her hand, and her elbow digging into the mattress. Her free hand started drawing shapes on Santana's bare stomach, moving lower with each formation.

"I'm gonna make it really, _really_ worth it." Brittany purred seductively. Santana suddenly felt a lot better with her choice, and that wasn't all she felt; something sticky was happening between her legs. One month didn't start in another five so…

"What else?" Brittany chirped in a different tone and looked at Santana with big blue eyes.

"What do you mean?" Santana asked with furrowed eyebrows. What was happening to the horizontal mambo?

"It's in February so it's gonna be all wintery… I think I want white… maybe ranunculuses or hydrangeas… _OH_ - Or carnations with camellias! Or we could do Van Dyke tulips 'cause that'd be really funny." Brittany blurted and got more excited the more she thought about it. Santana just blinked in confusion.

"That was the most confusion thing I didn't understand a word of…" Santana said questioningly.

"Not one word?"

"No…"

"Flowers! For the bouquets." Brittany explained and sat up in the bed, not bothering to wrap a sheet around her naked body. Santana scooted back a little to half sit against the head board.

"Oh. I don't know anything about flowers so you decide." Santana smiled amorously at Brittany who looked all bubbly and excited. They hadn't talked about any wedding details yet. They had only been engaged for slightly more than a week but still. Santana had barely been able to think about anything else and she had some great ideas for the food.

"I know this girl Becky and she does _amaaazing_ floral arrangements. We could go see her together?" Brittany suggested and shifted in the bed to sit over Santana's legs, making it easier for them to look at each other.

"That's a great idea!" Santana beamed. She loved how Brittany wanted her to be included in everything.

"Kurt is incredible with wedding cakes. He's like a cake whisperer." Santana continued and blushed a little, since the smile on Brittany's face let her know how happy it made Brittany that Santana had thought about the wedding too.

"I saw this really beautiful house, well it was a mansion or a manorial estate or something, just outside the city when I drove home from my support group retreat yesterday and I thought it might be good place to have it... maybe." Brittany said and also slipped into a more coy voice and face. Clearly they had both thought about it more than they had let the other know.

"That's awesome! I don't think I wanna do it in a church so…" Santana said and nodded. She was so excited that she brought her hands to rest on Brittany's back and drew the blonde closer.

"Yeah, me neither." Brittany agreed. "We could check it out this weekend… you know if it looks nice inside and if they even do weddings and stuff." Brittany pondered out loud and Santana smiled cagily.

"I have this menu in my head… I could cook it for you later…" Santana murmured and Brittany nodded with brio.

"So, uhm, San?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want like a big or a small wedding?" Brittany asked coyly and Santana tried to read in the blonde's face what the blonde wanted her to answer, but Brittany was doing a good job with her poker face and it made Santana a little nervous about her answer.

"…big." Santana said bashfully after a while and looked down while she waited for Brittany to respond.

"Me too!" Brittany beamed. "Really big."

"I want _everyone _to see how happy we are." Santana cooed amorously. Brittany leaned forward and kissed Santana.

"And I want really cool invitations so everyone goes like _hell yeeah_ when they open them." Brittany said and Santana laughed.

"You're a dork… My dork." Santana stretched her neck and kissed Brittany's nose.

"You're my princess." Brittany returned and Santana raised an eyebrow.

"But really sexy… like a jungle princess." Brittany added quickly with a smirk and she leaned in again, stealing another kiss.

"Let's see if we can get the Indigo Girls to play." Santana suggested. It stirred up a whole lot of confusion in Brittany's brain and a frown spread across her face.

"I'm kidding!" Santana chuckled and kissed Brittany again.

"I tried to think of a band but I couldn't come up with anything good…" Santana continued explaining.

"How would you feel about Rachel and Quinn singing? 'Cause like, Rachel brought it up and I thought it was a pretty nice idea." Brittany said softly, not wanting to push it too hard on Santana.

"Sounds great!" Santana said. It was amazing; when they didn't think the same, they complemented each other instead. Brittany drew a breath of relief.

"What about the honeymoon?" Brittany asked. "I'll take you anywhere you wanna go."

"Someplace relaxing, where I can get my suntan on." Santana answered, she wasn't great with name dropping geography.

"How about we travel around South America for a while? And maybe finish with a week on Necker Island?" Brittany suggested.

"Are you serious?" Santana exclaimed with a puff.

"Totally. If you want…" Brittany smiled. It was like her dream trip but she had wanted to wait to go on it. To have someone special with her.

"Oh my God!" Santana breathed in amazement. That was freaking unreal.

"Yes?"

"Yes!" Santana nodded and kissed Brittany for the millionth time but in her excitement she continued nodding and smeared her lips over Brittany's chin and nose, making Brittany laugh. Santana lifted both her hands and placed them on the back of Brittany's neck, lacing her fingers together and pulling Brittany's face closer to hers to hold it there.

"You take my breath away." Santana beamed and felt herself literally having trouble breathing as she soaked in Brittany's adorable, amazing, perfectness. Brittany kissed Santana and the kiss deepened fast. Suddenly Brittany blew a puff of air into Santana's mouth. Santana pulled her head back with a jerk.

"What are you doing?" Santana asked a little confused.

"Giving you your breath back." Brittany chirped with a joking smile and Santana burst out laughing.

"You're gonna need it for this next activity I have in mind." Brittany said and gave her sexy-time eyebrow wiggle.

"Oh…" Santana hummed seductively and in one swift manoeuvre she had Brittany on her back.

"Hey, speaking of breaths being taken away- do you know what you wanna wear?" Santana suddenly asked and in her distraction Brittany managed to roll them around so the blonde was on top.

"Yes." Brittany answered mysteriously. "Do you?"

"I think so…" Santana answered and her curiosity bubbled over. "So… what are you gonna wear?"

"A white dress." Brittany answered with a crooked smile.

"Yeah, but like, you know what I mean! What kind? How's it gonna look?" Santana persisted and earned a chuckle from Brittany.

"I can't tell you." Brittany said with a grin.

"Why not?" Santana pouted.

"The bride is not supposed to see the bride before the wedding… It's bad luck." Brittany insisted and kissed Santana's neck, up to her ear and then followed her jaw line to her lips where she felt the Latina trying to maintain a pout.

"… and you're about to get lucky." Brittany beamed and popped her head under the covers, kissing her way down Santana's body again.


	34. Chapter 34

It's not getting boring is it? Because I feel like there's not a lot of drama anymore. I mean I haven't had a cliffhanger in forever!

**CHAPTER 34**

**"Together"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 1st<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana woke up first and, feeling Brittany's arm around her, she purred in consent. She slowly turned around in Brittany's hold and made sure to not wake the blonde with her movements. She slid the sheet down and uncovered their torsos. Brittany was wearing an oversized T-shirt. Santana swiftly manoeuvred her hand under it and stroked her hand along Brittany's curves.<p>

When she started caressing the blonde's breasts Brittany began to stir. Santana responded by moving herself to lie on top of Brittany and kissing the milky skin on her neck. She darted her tongue out and massaged Brittany's pulse point with it. Brittany ran a hand through Santana's dark locks, telling her not to stop.

"You're in a friendly mood this morning." Brittany cooed, delighted with being woken up this way.

"_Uh-huh_." Santana answered huskily and discreetly let her hand travel lower. She fumbled by the hem of Brittany's underwear and cursed herself for letting it take so long. She was just about penetrate Brittany's wet entrance when Brittany suddenly grabbed her by the wrist.

"Oh my God." Brittany exclaimed, raising her eyes from the alarm clock on the nightstand to Santana's brown orbs. "It's February first!"

Damn, shit, fuck, crap! Santana was hoping Brittany wouldn't notice. Maybe if she doesn't stop? Santana tried to squiggle her wrist loose from Brittany's strong fingers.

"Santana, we're not supposed to…" Brittany said apologetically.

"C'mon, B. Just this one last time?" Santana murmured against Brittany's skin. Brittany sighed and rolled them over. Santana took it as a sign things were about to get heated and she wiggled her eyebrows in an excited manner.

Then Brittany stood up instead. The loss of contact made Santana cold and she gave Brittany a frown that the blonde tried to wipe away by leaning down and kissing her.

"I'll make us breakfast in bed." Brittany chirped and skipped towards the door.

"But I want_ you_ in bed." Santana pouted and sat up slightly only so she could fall backwards against the mattress again with a stubborn thud. This was going to be the hardest thing she had ever done. This was going to be harder than that time she tried to stop drinking. It was gonna be harder than when her TV broke and she couldn't watch her stories for months. It was going to be harder than that time she didn't eat sweets or chocolates for a whole year – even on her period.

It had only been 15 minutes and Santana already knew it would be much worse than all of those… combined. Brittany giggled and left the room anyways.

"You're gonna regret this, Brittany!"

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 5th<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana looked at the time. A couple of minutes until Brittany would be home. About an hour until Santana had to be at work. She turned the water on and splashed some more on her T-shirt. She cupped her hands and splashed some more on her face and hair too. Then she picked up the monkey-wrench again. She had no idea how to work on of these but Brittany didn't have to know that.<p>

Santana heard keys rustle in the lock so she quickly got down on her knees and crawled to have half her upper body inside the cupboard under the sink. She hiked up her T-shirt to make sure her panties and ass were clearly visible. She arched her back and brought the monkey-wrench to the big pipe.

"Babe, I'm home!" Brittany called to her.

"I'm in here!" Santana called back and tried to sound casual. She heard Brittany's steps and arched her back even more, letting out a little grunt as if frustrated with all the hard work. Brittany's jaw dropped as she entered the kitchen.

"W-what are y-y-ou d-doing? Brittany stuttered and even though she tried to turn her head away from the teasing sight her eyes remained fixed on Santana's butt cheeks. Santana squirmed out from under the sink and stood up. Her wet T-shirt clung to her body in all the right places and the wetness had made the white fabric see-through.

Santana wasn't wearing a bra and Brittany's breath hitched in her throat when she saw Santana's dark nipples poke the sleek material. Santana lifter her arm and wiped some pearls of water from her forehead.

"There was an incident… with the, uhm, pipe." Santana answered and sounded a little out of breath without really being tired. She didn't even care if Brittany believed this story, the look on the blonde's face was priceless.

"You're… wet." Brittany's voice was raspy and weak. Her lip trembled slightly as she spoke and she bit down on it to stop the shaky motions. Santana loved the sight of Brittany like this and she ruffled her hair to tease further. A strand of hair stuck to her plump lip and Brittany swallowed hard at the sight.

"You're staring." Santana smirked, grabbed a fistful of the T-shirt and wringed it out, making the water splatter around her feet. Then she grabbed a rag and squatted down, her thighs widely parted, giving Brittany an eyeful of the strip of underwear covering her sex.

"Santana, I…" Brittany mumbled. She wanted to look away so bad but she couldn't. She felt her heartbeat between her legs so she crossed them and clenched hard.

"What's the matter, Britt? Is something wrong?" Santana asked teasingly. This was the most fun she had had all week.

"No…" Brittany said hesitantly and shook her head slowly. "Nothing's wrong."

"Nothing you wanna do? No rules you wanna break?" Santana continued in the same teasing manner and to top it all off she pulled the shirt off over her head, stretching her upper body as much as she could in the movement. Brittany saw the scar on Santana's stomach and the heaving chest of the Latina and tilted her head with a tortured look on her face.

"… maybe." Brittany breathed out with a puff and then urgently filled her lungs again. She gave an eager nod. Santana walked up to her so their bodies were almost flush against each other. Brittany lifted her hands to put them on Santana but she was still trying to fight the urges inside her so she let them hover a couple of inches away from Santana's caramel skin. Santana toyed with her tongue, flicking it over Brittany's earlobe.

"Do you wanna break the rules, Brittany?" Santana asked hoarsely in the blonde's ear.

"Yeah…" Brittany squealed and felt disappointed with herself for not having more self restraint.

"Good to know." Santana whispered and then she left the kitchen. She was dying to fuck Brittany on the kitchen floor, it was one of her favorite places after all, but she really needed to get to work and this was all about the teasing anyways.

"Where are you going?" Brittany asked, a bit of desperation in her voice and in her following steps.

"Work." Santana stated over her shoulder as she got dressed. Brittany sunk down on the bed with a little pout. She knew she was the one who put herself in this position. When Santana was ready to leave she kissed Brittany's lips.

"Have fun." Santana smirked and gave Brittany a wink. She knew Brittany would spend the evening playing with herself. Brittany blushed. She knew Santana knew.

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 10th<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana had played the teasing game every single day and Brittany was going crazy. Santana practically had her begging for sex by now. As much as Santana wanted to give in she had come to enjoy seeing Brittany so hot for her all the time so she kept it going.<p>

Santana dipped her finger in the bowl of frosting she was making and sucked it into her mouth. Before she knew it she had been backed up and slammed against the wall, and she had a blonde woman attacking her neck with wet kisses. She took a moment to bask in the rare occasion but when she felt her lady parts start to twitch she had to put her foot down.

"Brittany…" She said like a mother who caught her kid with a hand in the cookie jar. Brittany just grunted in reply and continued the kissing.

"18 days, Britt." Santana said, her tone firmer this time. She felt Brittany's shoulder sink in defeat and pretty soon she was presented with Brittany's adorable pout.

"But it's your birthday, San… don't you wanna make like a _teeny-tiny_ exception?" Brittany murmured sadly. Santana furrowed her eyebrows. Brittany seemed genuinely upset.

"Are you crying?" Santana asked hesitantly. Brittany shook her head no.

"It's just really difficult… Maybe it was a mistake?" Brittany suggested.

"What about special?" Santana asked comfortingly. She wasn't sure why she was defending this stupid idea since she never wanted to be a part of it in the first place, and she had been working so hard to make Brittany crack but there was something about Brittany's eyes. Santana realized it really did mean a lot to Brittany and when it all came down to it; she wanted to give Brittany everything she ever asked for. Santana gave Brittany a couple of more seconds to answer but the blonde didn't even open her mouth.

"I'm sorry I've been so… difficult." Santana said apologetically. "But we can do this."

"Yeah?" Brittany asked with a shimmer of hope having crept into her voice.

"Totally!"

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 14th<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Santana! What are you doing?" Brittany only caught a glance of Santana as she walked into the bedroom where Brittany was on the bed reading a book.<p>

"What? What did I do?" Santana asked nervously and looked around to see if she knocked something over.

"Put your towel back on?" Brittany said, trying not to look at Santana's naked body, but finding it impossible.

"Why? I'm getting dressed." Santana shrugged in the doorway to the walk-in-closet.

"You can't do that." Brittany insisted.

"Why?"

"I'm in here!"

"So?"

"So… we're still not supposed to have sex and you're making it really hard for me right now." Brittany whined and closed the book. Santana had promised to not tease anymore.

"Am I making you hard, B?" Santana joked seductively and caressed her curves in a teasing manner.

"It's not funny." Brittany stated and sounded as if in agony.

"Britt, I won't sex you up. I'm just getting dressed." Santana said assuringly but a smirk still toyed on her lips.

"Fine. I'll close my eyes." Brittany sighed and shut her eyes. She looked silly just sitting leaned against the headboard with her eyes closed and her hands in her lap. Suddenly Brittany felt weight being lowered onto her lap and naked skin grazing against her fists and thighs. She opened her eyes in reaction and was met with caramel skin, plump lips and strands of dark, wet hair messily framing Santana's face. Drops of water trickling off the end of it, some drops landing on Santana's full bosom, some falling further and meeting Santana's stomach where they streamed down slowly and some landing on Brittany's hands and giving her goose bumps.

"_Oh my God, she's naked in my lap."_ Brittany mumbled. "You're naked in my lap." Brittany repeated, to Santana this time, and looked up at the ceiling.

Santana just laughed at Brittany being so adorable. After Santana had decided to not tease anymore it had actually gotten even more challenging to not have sex. And on top of everything; they still had two more weeks to go.

The more time that went by, the harder it got to be touched by the other without feeling it between their legs and they didn't even snuggle in bed at night anymore to spare themselves the torture. Santana found herself hypnotized by Brittany just taking a sip from a glass or licking her finger before flicking pages in a magazine. Brittany tried to avoid seeing Santana in too compromising positions but constantly found herself around when Santana worked out, showered or cleaned up in the apartment in undergarments.

"Babe… It's valentine's and I wanna get my cuddle on tonight." Santana said, her puppy eyes having trouble meeting Brittany's blue ones since they were still staring at the ceiling. They widened but didn't look down.

"We can't do that! It's two weeks left." Brittany said, seconds away from pushing Santana back on the mattress and fucking her like there was no tomorrow, let alone two weeks.

"I don't mean sex. Just like snuggle…" Santana said softly. It wasn't a thing she suggested very often and it had Brittany fixing her gaze in Santana's brown orbs.

"Oh." Brittany uttered and smiled coyly.

"Yeah, you know, just hugging and talking and maybe some sweet lady kissing…" Santana had almost rosy cheeks. She wanted to get it on with Brittany as much as ever, but she had also realized how much she missed those moments afterwards when they breathed together in each other's arms. When they murmured sweet nothings to each other and gentle, soft kissing made them forget the world. Brittany smiled sweetly.

"Fully clothed, I promise." Santana added and put her hands up as if in defence and Brittany giggled.

"Yeah, that sounds really nice." Brittany nodded and pressed one finger against Santana's stomach, stopping a drop on its journey and wetting her fingertip. Santana took Brittany's finger and kissed it gingerly. They both warmed up a little inside.

"Guess I'm gonna get dressed…" Santana said with a sigh and started lifting herself off Brittany.

"C'mere." Brittany murmured and wrapped her arms around Santana's waist. Santana hugged around Brittany's neck and buried her face in the blonde hair. The embrace was tight and warm. And a little wet due to Santana's newly showered hair.

Brittany loved the full lengths of her arms against Santana's bare skin. Not because it was naked but because it was Santana. Santana sniffed Brittany as she let her cheek stroke against the blonde's and she loved Brittany's breathing. Not because it was deep as in sexual but because it was deep as in soothing. '

With the embrace still locking them in place the girls shifted to kiss. With interlocked lips and closed eyes, silence and serenity prevailed during the sweet, still kiss. Her thumbs on Brittany's cheeks and the other fingers extending to reach the back of Brittany's head Santana held the kiss in place until she had to come up for air. They smiled amorously at each other and Santana stroked Brittany's right cheek with her thumb because her dark hair had rested there and made it moist.

"I make you hard, I make you wet – you can't catch a break, Britt." Santana joked and Brittany just shook her head and giggled.

"You're getting cold." Brittany stated and let her eyes fall, just for a second, to Santana's stiffening nipples. Santana glanced down and saw what the cold air was doing to her.

"Or am I getting hot?" Santana joked again and raised her eyebrows suggestively. Brittany stuck her tongue out like a child in a fight with a sibling.

"You're such a tease." Brittany pouted.

"I learned from the best!" Santana chirped and pecked Brittany's lips once before getting of the bed to get dressed – for real this time. She had to be at work in an hour. Brittany picked up her book again but had to skim several pages to find what page she was on since she had just closed it before without putting in the bookmark. When she had found her spot and gotten back to a comfortable reading pace Santana appeared again, dressed and ready. It tore Brittany away from the words.

"I'm going." Santana beamed. Brittany smiled. She loved to see Santana happy with going to work.

"See you tonight!" Santana said and she was going to turn around and leave but she skipped into the room and kissed Brittany first.

"Can't wait."

* * *

><p>Breadstix had been up and running for almost a year now, one month short to be precise, and it was gaining popularity fast. It had gotten some really great reviews and a few good ones. The owner being both lesbian and getting shot made for a lot of publicity and ones people tried the food few shrugged away from coming back. Santana was actually thinking about already expanding to opening one or two more and making a chain out of it.<p>

Being Valentine's, it had been busy for a Wednesday and Santana was pretty tired stepping inside the apartment a little after midnight.

She smelled it immediately. And then she heard the crackling noise. Brittany had made a fire. She was afraid Brittany would forget that it was snuggling night but now she felt stupid for thinking so. Brittany never forgot stuff like that and even when they didn't have anything planned she almost always waited up for Santana. Tonight already seemed to be better than she expected.

Santana slipped out of her shoes and put her purse down before taking off her big jacket. It was freaking cold outside and a chill went through Santana at the loss of warmth. Then she saw something that warmed her more than the thickest, fluffiest jacket could ever do. Brittany's smile.

"I missed you." Brittany purred, leaning against the doorway and looking cute it pyjama pants and a tank top.

"Hi, cuddle bear." Santana cooed and followed her girlfriend to the living room. The coffee table was nowhere to be seen and instead; a sea of blankets and pillows was spread in front of the fireplace.

"Britt…" Santana breathed a little taken by the cosy display.

"I felt bad about being all '_oh-no, you better not be getting' your naked on, 'cause I can't control me some wandering kink-hands_' earlier today…" Brittany said and Santana just looked at her with wide eyes, trying not to laugh. Brittany saw Santana's reaction and cracked up.

"I'm sorry. I totally can't work that, can I?" Brittany said and shook her head. Santana started laughing.

"No offense baby, but no…" Santana chuckled.

"I'll work on it." Brittany chirped and motioned for Santana to sit down on her fluffy creation.

"I'm just gonna shower real quick?" Santana said almost apologetically. She felt like a walking, greasy slab of meat and she didn't wanna rub it all over Brittany. Brittany smiled.

"I'll make us hot chocolate." She said with an amorous smile and turned to walk to the kitchen. Santana almost ran to the bathroom and ripped her clothes off as she went. In literally four minutes she was out of the shower again and dressed in panties and a big T-shirt. She blow dried her hair a little because she didn't want it to be all sticky and wet like before but she was too eager to make it completely dry.

When she got back to the living room Brittany was already sitting there with one cup in each hand. Santana sat down opposite her fiancée and crossed her legs, taking the cup and holding it with both hands in her lap. Brittany shifted to also sit with her legs crossed and mirrored Santana. Santana smiled hugely and then took a sip. She hummed at the deliciousness.

"Let's play a game." Brittany blurted.

"Okay… what kind of game?" Santana asked with suspicion.

"It's called '_my __favorite__'_ and it's just what it sounds." Brittany explained.

"What's your favorite 90's song?" Santana asked after thinking for a second.

"No. That's not how the game works, silly. You're supposed to say '_my favorite… something'_ and then I fill in what it is." Brittany further elaborated.

"Oh… _my_ favorite 90's song?" Santana asked and raised an eyebrow.

"Spice girls - Wannabe." Brittany chirped.

"Seriously?

"You know I'm right." Brittany teased playfully and Santana pouted. She totally was.

"Fine…"

"My turn! My favorite drink?" Brittany asked.

"Too easy, babe." Santana answered and shook her cup gently, making sure she wouldn't spill.

"Okay, let me try again." Brittany was getting really excited with the game and it was almost contagious. "My favorite… furniture?"

"Rocking chairs!" Santana called out, overjoyed with knowing the answer. This game was really intoxicating. Brittany laughed and nodded.

"Okay, my turn, my turn!" Santana giggled out.

…

"My favorite actress?" Santana asked alluringly.

"A young Jen Anistion. My favorite song?"

"My headband. Even if it's not a real song…"

"Is too!"

…

The girls played for almost an hour and the game seemed to have no end to it.

"My favorite Barbie dolls?" Brittany asked. So she still played with them every now and then? Whatever.

"Lara and Mackie!" Santana answered loudly and bubbly. So she liked to play with Brittany sometimes? Whatever.

"My favorite jewellery?" Santana continued.

"Diamond stud earrings! My favorite time of the day?"

"11:11 'cause you get to make a wish. My favorite place in the whole world?"

"With me." The answer just sort of plopped out of Brittany before she had a chance to concern herself with humbleness. Santana smiled crookedly as Brittany followed her answer with a coy lowering of her gaze.

"You know me inside-out." Santana said sweetly and put her almost empty cup down. She crawled over to Brittany on all fours and pried the chocolate drink out of her hands too. Brittany looked up.

"It's cuddle time." Santana murmured and bopped her own nose against Brittany's. Brittany shifted to her knees like Santana and reached for the hem of Santana's T-shirt. Santana tilted her head in a questioning manner.

"I wanna be really close to you…" Brittany whispered softly with a little nod and Santana reached her hands over her head and let Brittany slide the fabric off her body. Then she grabbed Brittany's top and took that off too. Brittany hooked a finger in Santana's panties.

"Everything?" Santana asked and Brittany nodded. Soon they both stood on their knees in a pool of softness, naked. Brittany looked gorgeous. The fire gave off a glow that lit half of her body in the most beautiful shimmer and her hair shone in a golden light.

Santana was ravishing. Her eyes looked darker than usual and her skin radiated beauty in the flickering light. Brittany ran her fingertips up Santana's arms, down her waist and landed on her hips where she held her grip. Santana hugged Brittany's waist and leaned forward, grazing her lips against the blonde's neck and shoulder.

Loving strokes and suave kisses created the moment and made it last forever in their memories. They lay themselves down, tangling their legs together. This was what Santana loved more than anything. Being so close automatically adjusted her breathing to be in unison with Brittany's.

This was what Brittany loved the most. Feeling Santana's heart beat with hers like one heart beating for the both of them, unable to be without the other.

They took turns drifting in and out of sleep, when one's eyes got too heavy the other's blinked open to bask in having someone so special to watch sleeping. Stroking each other's hair, kissing each other's lips, holding each other's hands all through the night. When the sun came peeking in the window the next morning, the fire having faded to glowing coal, they were still wrapped up in and around each other.

"I love you doesn't even begin to describe it." Brittany murmured sleepily.

"I love you is not even close." Santana whispered gingerly. The only thing that could depict their love was them. Their bodies. Their minds. Their hearts. Their souls. Together.


	35. Chapter 35

Oh my God! I love all of you sooo much! _(But you know you're my favorite, right? Yes you!)_ So crazy, crazy much! It's important to remember that. Your reviews make my day and so do my cheeky tumblr anons and so does anyone who even reads. It's surreal and fucking amazing! Although now I'm more scared about the drama I do have left but we're gonna hit 50 chapters so shit has to go down and just remember that no matter what; **I love you.**

Someone asked how old they were so let's see here... When they met in 2012 San was 22 and Britt 23 and now we're at 2015 and San just had her birthday so she's 25 now and so is Britt, but she's turning 26 in November.

Chapter explanation; First of all, pretty long chapter! Also, in the beginning here it's gonna be sort of jumpy-back- and-forthy between San and Britt and that's only because I wanted to give it a feel of happening at the same time so… that's my reason. Also, don't ask about the title, it's a lyric and for some reason I wanted it. Well don't just stand there, go on and read already!

**CHAPTER 35**

**"I hear a buzzing, I hear a ringing, listen close you'll hear the birdies singing" **

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 27th<strong>_

* * *

><p>They had divided the huge estate into two. The right side was assigned to Brittany and her group of friends and the left was Santana's. The left was a little bigger which was good because Santana had a bunch of relatives flown in from a little here and there and they needed some place to stay. What better place than the location of the actual wedding? Emma, Puck and Nathaniel were also spending the night and so was Mercedes.<p>

Brittany only needed two people to stay all night and that was Quinn and Rachel but she kept two rooms open just in case someone got a little too drunk after the bachelorette party.

"Have fun tonight, babe." Brittany chirped to Santana. She felt all giddy inside.

"Easy for you to say…" Santana muttered.

"Honey…"

"I'm just saying… my parents are here, and my cousins, and my little sister. Plus, Emma organized mine so…" Santana pouted. She was a little jealous of Brittany's 'real' bachelor party. They would have good music, drink margaritas and do shots and then everyone would sit in a circle around Brittany while she opened a bunch of gifts, ninety percent of which probably containing dildos, and what would Santana do? Drink tea with her relatives.

"Aw, baby, don't pout! Do you wanna switch?" Brittany suggested with a crooked smile.

"What?" Santana asked confused.

"I just want you to be happy." Brittany said, with a little more sadness in her tone and it made Santana feel guilty. She never meant for Brittany to think she wasn't happy. They were getting married tomorrow; it doesn't get happier than that.

"I am happy." Santana said quickly and hoped her smile didn't look forced, because it wasn't.

"I'm sorry, I'm just being grumpy." She added apologetically and leaned closer in an attempt to kiss Brittany but the blonde shrugged back.

"You're not PMSing are you?" Brittany asked worriedly and her eyes widened. She looked a little absentminded as she tried to do the math in her head. Santana furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"No… why?"

"Oh good. Tomorrow night –_ it's on_!" Brittany said firmly. Finally Santana understood what she meant and she couldn't agree more.

"It is _so _on!"

"Okay, you lovebirds! That's enough!" Quinn called in their direction and motioned for Brittany to come with her. Brittany kissed Santana on the lips.

"See you tomorrow." She said amorously and Santana smiled back happily.

"I love you." Santana murmured and earned several more kisses on her lips, on her cheeks, on her neck and a final one on her nose.

"I love you too." Brittany chirped and skipped off. Santana watched as Quinn and Rachel put a blindfold on her and led her through a door and out of Santana's sight.

"Are you ready?" A soft voice said behind Santana. It was Emma coming to get Santana, who turned around and saw Emma's motioning to get going.

"Just like that? You're not gonna blindfold me or anything?" Santana asked disappointedly. Emma looked surprised with the suggestion.

"No." She answered simply and started walking in the right the direction.

"Fine." Santana sighed and followed.

* * *

><p>"Are you peeking?" Quinn asked childishly while leading Brittany down a hallway and tried to correct the blindfold the way she imagined it would sit if Brittany didn't see anything.<p>

"I can't see anything." Brittany said honestly but the exaggerated fumbling in the air in front of her made Rachel doubt the truth to it.

"Don't look." Rachel ordered.

"I _really_ can't see a thing." Brittany repeated and this time she stumbled forward. Quinn was barely able to catch her and that served as enough proof. Brittany slowed her steps in fear of falling again so it took a little longer to get to the room than it had to. Suddenly she heard the door creak and Quinn's hold on her tighten.

"Okay, are you ready?" Rachel chirped. Brittany felt a little jolt of excitement.

"Yes!"

* * *

><p>Santana was having a pretty good time. There wasn't just tea even if there were a few, Emma included, who were drinking that too. Santana took a sip of her vodka cranberry. She didn't even know Mercedes was such a good bartender but apparently she could mix one hell of a drink if she wanted to.<p>

"Santana." Álvaro said with a nervous tap on her shoulder.

"Yeah?" Santana answered while turning around. Her father was sporting that deep wrinkle.

"I want to talk to you." He said, sounding almost shy which was rare for him. He offered his big hand to her and Santana slipped her, in comparison, tiny one into it. Was she supposed to be nervous? Álvaro led them to the side of the room, just by the windows. The fact that they were still surrounded by people made Santana a lot calmer.

"Remember that time…?" Álvaro asked with eyes pleading for Santana to understand what he meant. Santana knew immediately. He meant that one time when they had the biggest fight they had ever had.

It happened shortly before Santana decided to move to New York. It was a time when she had been low on ambition and not really doing much other than walking around at home, moping in sweat clothes and watching TV. One day her father lost his temper and there was a lot of yelling and harsh words.

"Yeah, I remember." Santana answered with another sip of her glass.

"I said… I t-told you… I said that you were a disappointment." Álvaro finally managed to squeeze out. He hated talking about this, he hated thinking about it, he just hated the fact that it had ever happened. His wrinkle grew even deeper and Santana could see how guilty he felt.

"I know, dad, but you already apologized for that." Santana said comfortingly. She truly wasn't angry with her father at all anymore. They had worked it out.

"I know, but I haven't-" Álvaro cleared his throat. "I haven't told you how proud I am of you, mija." He continued with tears in his eyes and already halfway to hugging his daughter.

Santana loved how small she felt in her father's big arms. She took a deep breath in the crook of Álvaro's neck. It had been a long time since they hugged like this.

"I am, Santana. I am so proud of you."

* * *

><p>Quinn was just about to rip the blindfold off.<p>

"Can I do it?" Rachel asked and her puppy eyes made Quinn melt.

"Sure you can, sweetie." Quinn answered and withdrew her hands for Rachel to take over. Rachel untied it slowly and Brittany blinked a few times as the fabric came off.

"Oh my God!" Brittany squealed and bobbed up and down a couple of times, like she does when she's excited and bubbly.

"Remember when we were 17 and you said you never wanted to get married?" Quinn asked Brittany who had a little trouble concentrating.

"But then you changed your mind and said you didn't wanna get married until you had taken a swim in melted chocolate?" Quinn continued and Brittany scrunched her nose as she tried to remember. She was unsuccessful, but she did remember being pretty set on never wanting to get married when she was younger.

"We tried to get a pool but…" Quinn said bashfully.

"…a fountain will have to do." Rachel filled in.

"This is amazing you guys!" Brittany cooed in awe of the big chocolate display in the middle of the room.

"That's you and Santana." Quinn added and pointed to the cake figurines dancing on the very top of the fountain.

"That was my idea!" Rachel was quick to let everyone know.

"This is amazing!" Brittany repeated and shook her head.

* * *

><p>Santana was on her fifth drink. Or was it sixth? Whatever it was, they were good and Mercedes kept them coming. She wasn't officially the bartender or anything but as soon as Santana found herself with an empty glass Mercedes always seemed to be around with a refill.<p>

Santana was wrong when she thought partying with her family couldn't be fun and she was wrong when she thought the music wasn't going to be good. Carmen and Santana had spent the last three songs dancing. No one else was, but they both knew they could dance so they weren't really embarrassed. Plus, Santana was on her sixth drink. Or was it seventh?

She felt a little warm so after she had gotten yet another drink from Mercedes, she went to the window for some air. As she struggled to focus her eyes on the little safety device currently giving her a lot of trouble opening the window she registered something else going on down at the courtyard. A van rolling up. She zeroed in on it and read the text it had written on the side. _Hal's strippers?_

"Emma? What's that?" Santana asked and scrunched her nose. Emma wasn't really close enough to hear her so Santana tried again, this time having dragged the redhead with her to the window.

"What's going on?"

"It appears as though someone has ordered an, uhm… exotic dancer." Emma answered and her hesitant tone let Santana know that Emma had nothing to do with it. Santana chuckled at first and then she realized that if the strippers weren't for her they were for Brittany.

_"Oh, hell no._" Santana mumbled and headed for the door.

"Santana, where are you going?" Emma called after her and did her best to keep up with the Latina.

"I don't want some slut touching my B-bear… or her beaver." Santana explained and sounded relatively calm in comparison to her choice of words. Emma managed to grab Santana's wrist and stop her.

"Okay, first of all, you don't know that she's a slut. And secondly I don't think they do that… touch the… no…" Emma said with her voice full of rationality despite her being uncomfortable with this topic.

"Brittany's mine though…" Santana pouted and stomped her foot against the floor. It made her whole body bounce and she spilled her drink. She squealed, half upset with spilling the delicious liquid, half delighted with the way it ran down her fingers and tickled. That's when Emma realized just how drunk Santana was already and she glanced at her wristwatch. Nine thirty.

"Maybe just water for you for a while, huh?" Emma said and pried the glass out of Santana's hand and put it down on the floor. She pulled out a napkin from her purse and dried Santana's fingers one by one.

"What? I've only had…" Santana started defending but lost her words as she stared down at her fingers and tried to figure out how many to hold up.

"I know sweetie. But you've drunken really fast and you've barely eaten all day." Emma explained to the wobbly Latina who nodded like she just understood some really difficult math.

"Let's wash those hands and go back to the party." Emma continued. Santana's face suddenly changed completely as her mind leaped from one thing to another and she tilted her head.

"Aaaaw, the party! You're so nice for doing all of this! You're the bestest friend ever." Santana slurred and in that moment she herself realized that maybe her buzz was bigger than she thought. She straightened her posture and composed herself. Emma giggled at Santana's attempt to appear sober and lifted the imaginary hat in an impressed nod. In return Santana gave her a look that said '_I know, right?'_

"But you're still my best friend." Santana added and pressed her lips hard against Emma's cheek.

* * *

><p>"Did somebody call 911?" A man's voice hollered from behind the closed door and gave it a couple of bangs before bursting through it and ripping the shirt off his back.<p>

"Oh my God." Rachel exclaimed in a puff. Brittany's eyes widened and she tried to find Quinn's eyes to ask what the hell was going on. Music started playing and the guy began rolling his hips and moving to the beat. A lot of the girls gave off excited squeals but Brittany was still trying to confront Quinn. When they finally made eye contact all Quinn did was point towards Rachel.

"Rachel, can I talk to you for a second?" Brittany asked the brunette from across the room.

"Yeah…" Rachel answered hesitantly and took a couple of steps closer to Brittany, but seeing that the blonde was making her way towards the door, Rachel turned in that direction too.

"I thought I said no strippers?" Brittany wanted to confirm with a tilted head when they were out in the hall.

"Quinn and I thought it would be fun…" Rachel said apologetically and shrugged her shoulders to match. Brittany had a smile pulling in the corner of her mouth. She was trying to be upset but she wasn't doing a very good job.

"Fine." Brittany said with a sigh. "Why did you get a male stripper, though?" She wanted to know. She would have at least expected the dancers to be girls.

"His name is Officer Candy. Up until he came through the door just now I thought it was a girl." Rachel hissed, a little embarrassed by her mistake. Brittany laughed.

"_Which one of you lovely ladies is the bride?" _They heard from the other room and Brittany's eyes widened in excitement.

"That's me!" She exclaimed to Rachel and then rushed back inside.

"I am! I am!" She called out and clapped her hands as she skipped back to her seat. The stripper was down to a tiny golden thong. Even though Brittany wasn't really playing for his team she could still enjoy watching those abs dance.

"What's you name?" He wanted to know and danced closer in a borderlining creepy manner.

"Brittany, what's yours?"

"Jesse." He answered as his butt made contact with Brittany's thighs. He was really smooth.

"_See! How was I supposed to know that 'Jesse' was a man?"_ Rachel whispered to Quinn who just shook her head in an amused manner.

"What's your favorite body part, Brittany?" Jesse asked as Brittany stuffed a one dollar bill into his underwear.

"Boobs." Brittany answered playfully and earned some laughter from a couple of the girls.

"Oh." Jesse answered and stopped dancing. He looked a little disappointed for a while but then he smiled crookedly.

"That's okay. Mine's penises."

* * *

><p>Santana had calmed down a little. A couple of glasses of water and an hour or so without drinking had really done the trick. It was getting later and most of her old cousins and her parents had already left to go to their rooms.<p>

"Carmen, shouldn't you go to bed?" Emma asked the younger Latina gently. She thought the next activity was for adult eyes only. Carmen furrowed her eyebrows. She didn't want to leave. She was having a really good time and Mercedes had even let her have a few drinks.

"Oh, let her stay!" Mercedes said casually and took a seat around the coffee table. Carmen smiled smugly and sat down next to Mercedes.

"Where's Santana?" One of the women asked.

"Here!" Santana called as she emerged from the bathroom after a much needed pee. "What's up?"

"You have some gifts to open." Emma explained and took a seat too.

"Some gifts? Pour moi?" Santana asked and put a hand over her heart like she was flattered. She saw the formation of how everyone was sitting and realized she would be the center of attention for a while. She got excited. This bachelorette party kicked ass! She sat down and someone turned the music down just a couple of notches.

"This one is from me." Emma said coyly and handed Santana the first gift. Santana ripped the paper and her jaw dropped when she saw what was inside.

"**_You_** got me this?" Santana questioned sceptically and held up the dildo for everyone to see. Emma's cheeks turned a thousand times redder.

"It was the least grotesque one they had." Emma excused, but was still nervous about Santana not liking it.

"It's really pretty." Santana admitted. "And great timing too."

"What?" Mercedes didn't understand that last comment and wanted to clear up her confusion.

"Brittany and I have been running low on toys lately." Santana explained vaguely.

"_This is so gross."_ Carmen whispered under her breath. Mercedes interest wasn't dead yet though.

"How so?"

"Well, we broke one in some very active preparations for celibacy month and I might have worn one out trying to stay away from Brittany…" Santana elaborated. Carmen made a disgusted face, Emma made an uncomfortable one but Mercedes just scrunched her nose.

"I guarantee my girlfriend and I have broken more than you and Brittany." She challenged with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh yeah? How many?" Santana challenged back and crossed her arms.

"Okay! How about that next gift?" Emma interjected. Partly because she didn't want to hear this and partly because she was trying to prevent one of these silly fights they _always_ got in. A woman handed Santana another wrapped gift which she accepted with excitement.

She was handed gift after gift and she laughed and had a better time than she ever thought this party was going to be.

"I have something for you too." Mercedes said after all the gifts had been opened and showed to everyone. By the way, Santana was right, ninety percent did contain dildos. Mercedes handed Santana a flat, squarish gift, not even close to big enough to fit a fake penis and Santana shook it to see if that would give her some clue about what it was. It looked like a CD. She unwrapped it and surprise, surprise, it was a CD. It looked home made.

"It's a recording." Mercedes stated and it made Santana furrow her brows in confusion.

"It's from when you called me after yours and Britt's first date." Mercedes continued and watched as Santana's face softened.

"Do you record our phone conversations?" Santana asked and tried to sound bitchy but she was a little caught up in her eagerness to go listen to it. Mercedes shook her head.

"No. I just knew this one would be special."

* * *

><p>Brittany was getting drunk. She had enjoyed three lap dances from Jesse already. They weren't as good, not even close, as Santana's. There wasn't really anything erotic about them at all but Brittany was still having a really good time. She was fascinated with the smoothness of Jesse's thighs and he gave her some tips of waxing and shaving.<p>

She had sat in his lap during _Truth or Dare_ and _Never Have I Ever_ and she had even splattered chocolate on him and licked it up. He was like her toy tonight. But Brittany wasn't selfish with her piece of man candy. Everyone who wanted a lap dance got one and by now even Quinn had given it a go.

"Ladies! Thank you for a wonderful night but I must be going." Jesse announced and gathered all his clothes together.

"Tell Burt hello from me!" Brittany said and hugged Jesse's naked skin one last time. During the drinking games Jesse had joined in and so they found out that he had a partner named Burt and they even had a kid together. Also that Burt wasn't very fond of Jesse's job but it paid well and the kid needed braces.

"I will. Good luck tomorrow, gorgeous! I'll text you." Jesse said to Brittany and gave the room one last wave goodbye.

"See! That wasn't so bad." Rachel said smugly when Jesse was gone. She was hoping to take all the credit for Brittany's new friendship.

"Has anyone seen Santana?" Brittany asked out of the blue.

"Why?" Quinn asked without giving an answer.

"I miss her…" Brittany stated sadly.

"You're in the same house." Rachel said with furrowed eyebrows.

"I wanna go see her." Brittany said and drank what was left in her glass.

"Honey, you'll see her tomorrow." Quinn argued. She knew they had decided to not see each other until they were walking down that aisle together at the ceremony.

"It's not soon enough." Brittany pouted and sunk down in a couch. "It's never soon enough." Right after she said it a little hiccup came out. And then another and another.

"You're a little drunk. Maybe we should get you to bed. Beauty sleep and all." Quinn said and helped Brittany back on her feet and guided her to her bedroom where she also helped her out of her clothes.

"Wash your face and brush your teeth and I'll wait here." Quinn said gently and flung aside the covers on the bed to prepare for Brittany to crawl in later. Brittany did as she was told and when she came back Rachel was also in the room and her and Quinn were kissing.

"How come you get to kiss and I don't get to kiss San?" Brittany questioned with scepticism and tilted her head as she watched the two other girls' lips part.

"Because we're not getting married." Quinn answered casually.

"Yet." Rachel mumbled quietly. Quinn turned her head back to look at Rachel and her coy expression told Quinn that she had heard the brunette correctly. Ridiculous grins spread across their faces.

"Sweetness overload. Head exploding." Brittany said in a robot voice and did the robot before jumping into bed. It was a poster bed with white drapes and red sheets.

"I had a bed like this when I was little." Brittany said, mostly to herself since her friends were still a little caught up in their moment. "Except it was all pink. And I had a really big teddy bear. He would sit in this corner and protect me from ghosts. Except I knew there were no ghosts. But he protected me from zombies."

"You're rambling." Quinn said as she tucked Brittany in and finished with a quick kiss on her forehead.

"Santana says I'm charming." Brittany said sleepily and yawned.

"Good night, princess." Quinn murmured lovingly.

"I won't." Brittany mumbled.

"Won't what?" Rachel asked confused.

"Let the bed bugs bite."

* * *

><p><em>You don't get it, M. She's so amazing.<em>

Santana had listened to this CD three times now. The guests had all gone home or to their rooms and Santana was alone in her bedroom.

_She's like the best kisser ever! Remember that girl from camp I told you about? And I said that I would never meet anyone who kissed as well as her? I was wrong._

It was getting pretty late and she wanted to look good tomorrow so she knew she had to sleep soon. She just loved all the things she said on this recording. Usually hearing your own voice is horrible but now everything seemed right and the fact that it _was_ her voice just made it even more perfect.

_I just couldn't stop looking at her._

Listening to this also reminded her of that first date and every little detail that she might have forgotten came creeping back to her consciousness. All the things that she had thought and felt back then rushed through her and it was like she was falling in love all over again.

_We just fit together. When we danced and when we slept. Even the way we breathed._

* * *

><p><em><strong>February 28th<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana blinked awake in the lonely bed. She stretched her legs out. She remembered that since always and up until about two and half years ago having a bed all to herself was her favorite way of sleeping. And then along came Brittany.<p>

There was nothing that could promise a better day than to wake up with her milky legs tangled up with Santana's, her goofy morning smile always squished slightly against the pillow, her frizzy blonde hair tickling Santana's nose. There's something about Brittany… and just feeling her warmth turned every morning to gold.

But she wasn't here with Santana now. Brittany was in a different part of this huge estate, waking up alone too. In just a few hours Santana would be forever united with the love of her life in front of everyone she cared about and loved. A jolt of excitement went through her. Today was her wedding day. Her wedding day!

She could have never imagined herself being so happy about it and yet somehow she found herself thinking the most cliché thing ever; that it was the happiest day of her life. Almost like she was under a spell. Brittany enchanted or something.

Santana giggled out some of the nervous giddiness and threw the covers aside to get up. It was a little cold and chill ran through her. She tiptoed on the cold hardwood floor to the window and raised the blinds. She had to squint for a while to get used to the new light but when her eyes had adjusted, and she saw the beautiful outside, she had to smile.

The big front lawn was white and the branches of all trees were heavy from the snowy load. It must have snowed all night and it was gorgeous. This place was truly perfect for a winter wedding. Like a wedding in wonderland.

Santana leaned closer to the window and exhaled against the glass, creating a thin layer of steam. She drew a heart in with her fingertip before it faded. She did it again but this time she wrote San heart Britt.

There was a quiet knock on the door and Santana quickly wiped her hand over the little art work before she turned around. Emma peeked her head inside, holding a big cup of tea in each hand. Santana lazily threw on her silky robe and relieved Emma of one of the cups. She sat down on the bed with crossed legs and Emma mimicked in front of her.

"Good morning." Emma said gently with a big smile. "Did you sleep okay?"

"I don't know…" Santana answered hesitantly and took a sip of the tea. Emma frowned at the confusing response. Santana scrunched her nose to try and explain.

"I feel like I've been lying awake all night… you know, like, when you were a kid on your birthday and you would just lie there in the morning and wait for your family to come in and sing happy birthday and bring you breakfast in bed? I feel like that's been me this whole night… only I'm not tired."

"Are you nervous?" Emma asked with sparkling eyes, remembering how it felt waking up on her wedding day.

"A little… a lot." Santana answered with a coy smile shook her head lightly at how surreal it was to finally be here on this day.

"You don't have to worry. I'm on top of everything." Emma said with reassurance.

"It's just that Brittany and I have been trough so much… It's finally happening, Em. This is it, ya' know." Santana said and cocked her head. Emma's eyes got a little teary from reading all the happiness beaming from Santana's face.

"Heey…" A voice said in the door and caught the attention of both ladies on the bed. It was Carmen plopping her head in to check up on her sister.

"Come in." Santana said eagerly and put her cup down on the nightstand. When Carmen was close enough Santana wrapped her arms around her sister and pulled her down on the bed.

"You're so weird." Carmen breathed but even through trying to be cool she couldn't help but giggle at her sister's giddiness.

"Why wasn't I invited to this cuddle party?" The third bridesmaid said in the door and sounded offended, but couldn't keep a straight face for very long.

"Mercedes!" Santana exclaimed with a squeal and waved her hand for Mercedes to join them. The bed got a little crowded, since it wasn't even a double bed and it now had four people filling it.

"Look at that. All my girls…" Santana murmured. She was so happy she could wake up with all of them so close.

"What time is it?" Carmen asked and squirmed out of Santana's tight hold to be able to breathe.

"It's twelve fifteen." Emma answered after a quick glance at her wrist watch.

"Has anyone seen Brittany?" Santana asked curiously.

"This house is too huge." Mercedes answered casually.

"How did you even find this place?" Carmen asked sceptically.

"Britt found it, and we checked it out and… isn't it perfect?" Santana explained and looked around at the walls and the furniture. Santana couldn't get over how great this place was. The hall where the ceremony would be held later today was gorgeous and really spacious.

"I'm glad I got my own room… I'm pretty sure I heard mom and dad get it on last night." Carmen said and sighed. It was like her ears were doomed to always be tortured by the sound of other people's love making.

"So not the mental picture I want today, C" Santana said and put her hand up like a stop sign. Mercedes chuckled. Emma shifted uncomfortably at the topic at hand and cleared her throat.

"So do you wanna start getting ready?" The redhead asked to change the subject.

"Yeah, I should probably shower." Santana mumbled and got up from the bed.

"I drew you a bath." Emma said and stood up too, ready to guide Santana to it. Santana grabbed her toilet bag and the expensive new underwear set she had bought the other day.

The bra was strapless and kind of plain but the panties were really sexy. The white set was topped of with a cute garter because you have to have one of those when you get married. Santana had already tried everything on yesterday and it had a really innocent look to it, which obviously she was not. It was cute, though. The wedding night could not come soon enough!

"Will you be okay?" She asked her other two bridesmaids who seemed amused by the fact that Santana felt like she needed to take care of them on this day, of all days.

"Yes!" They said in unison and motioned for Santana to go take that bath.

Santana let her silky robe fall and her bra and panties were quick to follow. Emma's eyes shot closed and stayed that way until she heard Santana sink down in the steamy water. Santana hummed at the warmth of it against her cool skin. It was soapy and lathery and the whole room smelled really nice. Emma put on some music and lit a few scented candles.

"There's no rush so just take your time." She said gently and headed for the door. "Call if you need anything."

"You're not staying?" Santana questioned with furrowed eyebrows.

"Oh." Emma uttered hesitantly. "Sure."

She grabbed a clean towel and used it to lift a little stool the side of the tub. Then she grabbed a second clean towel and put it over the seat before sitting down. At first they just sat there in silence for a while. Santana loved the hot water and it was so soothing that she almost fell asleep in it. Emma found a stack of Cosmo magazines and she and Santana spent the next forty-five minutes doing quiz after quiz as Santana washed her hair and shaved her legs.

When they returned both Mercedes and Carmen were already in their bridesmaids dresses.

"You look great." Santana cooed to them and sat down by the dressing table in her underwear. She let her towel fall from her head and a few drops of water trickled down her back and gave her goose bumps. Mercedes grabbed the blow dryer and started drying Santana's hair. Carmen poured out the content of Santana's make up bag and grunted and scratched her scalp as she tried to decide which items to choose.

Emma went to check on Noah and Nathaniel but returned just in time for Mercedes to have finished Santana's hair and Carmen to have finished her make-up. They high-fived each other after eyeing their work carefully. It was ridiculous how well those two got along after just spending a couple of hours together.

Santana stood up and walked over to her dress, hanging on the door. The girls squealed excitedly behind her as she took it down. She slowly stepped into it and let it run up her curves to hug her body. Emma laced her up and brought her to the full length mirror. Santana exhaled in a puff when she saw herself.

Her olive skin contrasted with the whiteness of the dress. Her breasts looked pretty big and her neck looked long thanks to the halter neck strap. Her upper body looked slim in the tight top part of the dress and the curve of her hips was flattered as the dress widened there and flowed to the floor beautify.

Santana closed her eyes and exhaled deeply. This was as real as it could get. When she opened her eyes again a familiar face stood behind her. She turned around and confirmed that her mother was really there.

"You are so beautiful." Gabriela cooed lovingly.

"Thank you." Santana whispered back. Everything was so perfect and it made her really nervous.

"Everything is gonna be great, right?" Santana asked restlessly.

"Don't worry. Everything is gonna be perfect." Gabriela ensured her and put her arms around Santana.

* * *

><p>"Look at you, sweetie." Quinn said amorously and shook her head with tears in her eyes as she looked at Brittany all dolled up and in her white gown.<p>

"You're stunning." Rachel agreed.

"We have something for you." Quinn chirped and went to get her purse while Rachel motioned for Brittany to sit down. Quinn sat down with her purse in her lap and fumbled with her hand in it.

"Okay, so first we have something old." Quinn pulled out a little piece of paper.

"Uhm, it's not really that old. It's the ticket for the first movie we ever went to see together." Quinn continued to explain and handed it to Brittany.

"Oh my God, I remember this!" Brittany exclaimed and stroked the stale ticket to Clueless with her thumb. When Brittany moved to the city at the age of 15, Quinn was one of the first people she made friends with. Brittany looked down at her dress and then she put the piece of paper in her bra with a playful smile.

"I was in charge of something new…" Rachel said apologetically.

"But I kinda forgot so I had to get something when we stopped for gas on our way here yesterday." She continued and reached in Quinn's purse.

"It's a packet of gum." Rachel stated and offered it to Brittany who laughed at it.

"Chew a piece right now! Fresh breath is crucial for the first kiss as lawfully wedded." She explained with a very serious tone and chopped the air for extra affect. Brittany gave an equally serious nod and took a piece in her mouth.

"And for something borrowed…" Quinn continued and held her wrist out in front of Rachel who started undoing the clasp of her simple silver bracelet.

"You've always like this so I thought you could wear it today." Quinn said coyly, not sure if Brittany would like idea.

"It totally goes with your dress." She ensured. Brittany grinned widely and extended her arm for Rachel to put it on her.

"Thank you so much." Brittany beamed.

"And finally, something blue." Rachel chirped and clapped her hands together a couple of times. Quinn searched the inside of her purse one more time and pulled out a little wrapped gift. Brittany eyes sparkled as she unwrapped it slowly. Inside was a jewellery box which she opened too and found a beautiful silver hair comb with white diamonds and a sapphire one in the center.

"Oh my gosh…" Brittany breathed in awe of the beautiful accessory. She let fingertips stroke over it. "It's gorgeous."

Quinn took it out of the box and walked around to stand behind Brittany. She slid in the blonde's tight hairdo.

"There." Quinn murmured contently. Both Rachel and Quinn just smiled proudly at Brittany and all six eyes were glassy within seconds.

"I love you guys so much." Brittany said and stood up, reaching her arms out to hug both her friends at the same time. The hug was soft but loving.

"We have to go and do a sound check." Rachel said after a while.

"We wouldn't want anything to go wrong today." She joked. Brittany nodded in reply. Rachel and Quinn backed out of the room slowly, unwilling to tear away from the beautiful bride.

"Love you." Quinn said and blew an air kiss.

Brittany walked over to the window and looked outside. Then her eyes tore her away from the beautiful winter wonderland to look in the mirror again. She looked back and forth several times and couldn't decide which sight was her favorite.

Guests were starting to arrive and car after car parked outside and handsome suits and pretty dresses made their way inside. Brittany's heart started beating faster at the thought of closing in on the ceremony. She felt really giddy inside. Her reflection caught her eye again.

Her hair was up in a tight bun and now the hair comb completed the look perfectly. Brittany's skin looked incredibly milky and smooth over her chest and shoulders where no straps were to be found. The sleeves of her dress started below her shoulders and ended just above her elbow in a tight lace material. Her upper body all the way down to mid thigh was draped tightly and gave her the most feminine shape and made her ass look awesome. The dress then widened and had a little trail running after her.

Brittany turned to the window again and watched two birds play out on a branch. She suddenly felt something change in the room. Something was definitely different so she turned around.

"San!" She exclaimed when she saw her fiancée eyeing her in the doorway.

"Hey, Britt-Britt." Santana cooed coyly and stepped inside, closing the door gently behind her.

"You're not supposed to be here! You're not supposed to see me… how many times do I have to tell you; it's bad luck." Brittany said stubbornly and tried to cover herself with her hands but they were nowhere near large enough to hide behind. Santana just smiled at her.

"I couldn't stay away… besides, I'm the luckiest woman alive right now." She beamed at Brittany and approached the blonde with slow steps. Brittany pouted but found it difficult to force down the pulling at the corners of her mouth because Santana was so beautiful in her dress and her hair. You would think they would look alike since they both wore white dresses but they didn't. They were completely different but in a way that complemented each other instead of clashing.

"You look… like a goddess." Santana said in awe of the breathtaking bride in front of her. She almost couldn't find words for it and she certainly couldn't get enough of seeing it.

"I can't wait to kiss you as my wife." Santana continued since Brittany still seemed to be on mute. It earned a smile from Brittany who reached her hand out and interlocked fingers with Santana.

"You're amazing." Brittany murmured and kissed the back of Santana's hand before stroking over it with her thumb.

"Today's our day, B"

"Today's magical." Brittany said back. They were kind of afraid to mess up each other's hair and make up but they were both longing for each other so they hugged gently. In the embrace they heard a buzzing that startled them both.

"B, you didn't turn off your phone?" Santana questioned and pulled away slightly. Brittany walked over the make-up table where her phone was making the irritating noise.

"I was waiting for a text from Jesse… I must have forgotten. Sorry." She excused and took the phone in her hand.

"It's fine." Santana said and shrugged her shoulders casually. She hadn't meant for Brittany to feel guilty.

"That's weird. I don't recognize this number…" Brittany said hesitantly and furrowed her eyebrows as the vibrations echoed through her hand and up her arm.

"Answer it?" Santana suggested with another shrug. Brittany slid her thumb over the screen

"Hello?" Brittany said into the phone, still sporting the confused frown. There was a pause.

"Yes, this is she." Brittany continued, her voice having shifted into something more worried, and took a couple of steps away from Santana.

"Don't be long, the ceremony is starting, like… soon." Santana said before turning to the mirror to fix a few strands of hair. She thought she might as well go back to her room when she saw Brittany in the reflection. The blonde sunk down in a chair and nodded repeatedly into the phone. Brittany's face looked so different now, and an unnerving feeling crept into Santana's gut. Brittany let the phone fall without even bothering to hang up and just stared blankly straight ahead. Santana hurried over to Brittany and squatted down carefully to not mess up the dress.

"What's wrong?" Santana asked gingerly and hugged Brittany's hands. Brittany raised her gaze and locked her eyes in Santana's. The apologetic look in Brittany's orbs made Santana dread the answer, and almost wish she hadn't asked.

"I can't marry you today." Brittany whispered quietly.

* * *

><p>I know! It's a cliffhanger! If I had balls I'd allow all of you one kick each, but I don't so… boob squeeze?<p> 


	36. Chapter 36

I'm going out tonight, I'm feelin' alright, gonna let it all hang ooouuut! BUT NOT BEFORE GIVING YOU ANOTHER CHAPTER OF COURSE!

Oh, also! Did you see how we just flew past 600 like a piece of cake? THAT WAS AMAZING! I'm doing a shoutout. To who you ask? (Or is it to _whom_?) ALL OF YOU! Because you're pretty darn special!

**CHAPTER 36**

**"Explosions and gun shots"**

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><p><strong><em>February 28th<em> **_continued_

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><p>Santana almost fell backwards.<p>

"Are you breaking up with me?" She asked with scepticism and furrowed eyebrows, withdrawing her hands from Brittany's to guard herself slightly from the blow she was expecting to be hit with.

"No." Brittany answered and shook her head. "No, of course not. I love you."

"Then why are you leaving me at the altar?" Santana asked and sounded irritated. She stood up from in front of Brittany and backed away slightly. She waited for Brittany to say something. Take it back, explain herself, something, _anything_! But Brittany sat quietly and couldn't turn her eyes away from the phone she was still clutching in her hand. The silence was driving Santana crazy.

"I can't even…" Santana breathed and put her hand over her heart to calm herself down. She headed for the door. She felt so rejected; she needed to get out of here. Suddenly Brittany's voice had her coming to a halt.

"They found her." Brittany said quietly. It was almost like a whisper that Santana could barely hear and on top of that; Santana still didn't understand.

"Who?" Santana asked and sounded irritated but she turned around again to look at Brittany.

"My mom. They found my mom." Brittany answered. Her voice was empty and she stood up and looked out the window. Her eyes found the two birds that were still playing on a branch out there and she longed to be one of them so she could just fly away. Being turned away from Santana, the Latina couldn't see the sadness in Brittany's face.

"Britt, that's amaz-"

"She's dead. They found her body." Brittany interrupted and sighed in defeat.

"Oh my God." Santana breathed and put a hand over her mouth. "Where?"

"In Mr. Figgins's house." Brittany answered simply and Santana scrunched her nose in confusion. Brittany was being so vague… Maybe she didn't want to talk about it. But it wasn't like Santana could just let it go considering where they were and why.

"Who's Mr. Figgins?" She asked gently and approached Brittany. The sadness Brittany was emanating was slowly sinking in and Santana wanted to comfort her. She stood slightly behind Brittany and waited patiently for her to continue.

"He was our neighbour before we moved to the city." Brittany said monotonously.

"He was like a brother to dad and like an uncle to me. He died recently and they tore down his house… they found her in one of the walls." Brittany explained, not taking her eyes off the two birds out on the branch. They lifted and flew away almost at the same time and it had some of the snow falling down and landing on the roof of someone's car.

"_Holy fuck."_ Santana exclaimed but muffled herself quickly with both hands over her mouth. She squirmed uncomfortably. Her strategy when things got serious or emotional was always to make a joke about it, but she was pretty sure a joke wouldn't be the smartest thing right now. God, why did she have to suck at comforting people?

Brittany shoulders had sunk so low that they couldn't possibly go any lower and it hurt Santana's heart to see it. She put her hand on Brittany's shoulder and turned the blonde around into a hug. Brittany hugged back but only loosely put her arms on Santana's back, like she wasn't really in the hug. Brittany's tight hairdo had made sure to not leave any loose hairs in her neck and Santana stroke the smooth area repeatedly with slow, gentle strokes.

"I'm _so_ sorry, honey." Santana murmured against the naked skin on Brittany's shoulder. It made Brittany finally cling to her more tightly and their bodies converged. The warmth pushed away the worries in Santana's heart. She placed a few gentle kisses in the crook of Brittany's neck and then rubbed her thumb over the spot to remove the traces of lipstick she left there.

"Come on, we should get ready." Santana said and pulled away gingerly with a couple of steps back.

"Hmm?" Brittany hummed questioningly.

"For the ceremony." Santana clarified.

"What?" Brittany asked and tilted her head with an almost offended expression on her face.

"It's about to start." Santana said matter of factly and looked around to find a clock that could give her the exact amount of what was merely minutes left.

"Did you not hear me? I'm not marrying you today." Brittany said and sounded a little pissed off. She wanted to back up a few steps to be able to calm down but she was already almost up against the windowsill. Santana came a little closer but Brittany put her hands up to mark that she did not want her space invaded anymore. Santana stopped and frowned at the fact that she wasn't allowed closer. The feeling of rejection came rushing back and the next breath she drew was with great effort. She didn't know where to turn other than to fighting fire with fire.

"Babe, we've spent months planning this, we've spent a shit load of money on it and I have relatives flown in from all over the world. C'mon." Santana persisted angrily and returned the look on Brittany's face with an irritated frown.

"Come on? _Come on?_ How can you not understand me on this?" Brittany almost screamed.

"Britt…" Santana sighed.

"No! Do you think I wanna look back on this day and be like; _was it the happiest day of my life?_ Or was it _the day they found the remains of my mother's murdered body?_" Brittany shrieked and even had trouble looking at Santana right now.

"She was murdered?" Santana breathed out questioningly.

"They found her in a freakin' wall. A _wall_, Santana!" Brittany hollered and Santana's head shrugged back in reaction to the loud words. Santana's mind was spinning and she still didn't understand. She wanted Brittany to explain but little did she know that the blonde was just as confused as she was.

"How did it happen? Did Mr. Figgins do it?" Santana asked, her voice gentle but full of curiosity.

"I'll never fucking know, will I?" Brittany put her hands up but then let them fall just as quickly. She looked like she didn't know what to do with herself. She forgot where she was and backed up anyways only to slam her hips into the windowsill and her ankle thudded against the radiator under the window. When she realized there was a complete and undisputable stop, she suddenly charged forward instead and half ran past Santana and out of the room.

Santana followed but Brittany was so fast she only caught a glimpse of her in the hallway before she had completely disappeared. When Santana heard a door slam she rushed back into the room and to the window, where she soon saw Brittany's black BMW pull out and drive down the long driveway to the gate and turn out into the streets. Santana slammed her fist against the wall.

With shaky steps she made it down the stairs. She half expected her legs to fail her after each new step but they carried her to the main hall where all the guests were waiting. She just walked right past her father and didn't even notice him while doing so. To add insult to injury the music started playing just as she entered the large room and everyone stood up, believing a wedding was about to happen.

Santana wiped away the tears from her cheeks, not caring that she was smearing mascara all over her face. She made it to the end of the aisle with everyone's eyes on her. From across the room she saw Álvaro's questioning eyes. He furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head in confusion because he had no clue what was going on.

Since there was one staircase for the left side of the house and one for the right opposite each other with the big doorway to the ceremony hall in the middle; the idea was to have Santana and Brittany walk down the stairs at the same time and each hook an arm in Álvaro for him to lead them down the aisle.

Santana looked back at her father and shook her head too, but more apologetically than anything else. A confused murmur spread among the guests and got louder. Gabriela looked around the room like she was waiting for all the missing pieces of the puzzle to fall into place. Like any second now things would magically morph to perfect but as the seconds passed her warm smile faded. Santana could see Carmen's hands form tight fists in reaction to her crying sister and Emma stood up from her seat, making her way over to Santana with fast steps.

"_The wedding's off_." Santana whispered and sobbingly let her legs fail her. Emma caught Santana in her arms and tried to hold her up. A few people gave off worried cries and the confused murmur continued to grow louder. It was like explosions and gun shots in Santana's head and the louder it got the more panicked she felt and her breath hitched and jerked out of her unevenly. Emma threw Mercedes a look which she returned and stood up.

"I got it." She said with confidence and nodded for Emma to take Santana into a different room.

"_The wedding's off_." Santana whispered again but still refused to believe the truth to it. Her mind was screaming it but her heart kept telling her it wasn't true. Her eyes flickered back and forth between different spots on the floor. Someone tried to make their way up but Mercedes stopped them in their tracks and motioned for everyone to take a seat again. The crowd was growing weary though and it felt like the room was getting smaller and forcing them closer. Emma pulled out strength she didn't even have to hold Santana up. They needed to get out of the room because the stressful mood was anything but helping Santana.

"Shh, come on, sweetheart." Emma cooed and brought Santana's arm around her neck as she led her up the aisle again. Santana was limping her way forward and almost fell down a couple of times.

"A few more steps, honey." Emma encouraged before letting Santana fall into an armchair away from everything else. Emma squatted down in front of her and rubbed up and down Santana's arms calmingly.

"I can't breathe." Santana squealed and tapped over her chest.

"Slow breaths." Emma said gingerly and demonstratively inhaled and exhaled in a methodical pattern until she had Santana breathing in the same way.

"Hey…" A voice startled the two. "What's happening? Quinn and I went to do a quick sound check and… where's Brittany?" Rachel asked confused.

"She left." Santana answered monotonously and tried to find her way back to the pattern of breathing which seemed to be the only way her body would let her take in oxygen. Rachel mouthed an 'Oh' but was afraid to speak again. Quinn could see that Santana needed to be alone with Emma.

"I'll go call her." Quinn said calmly and grabbed Rachel's hand, leading them both to a different room.

"I sent everyone home…" Mercedes said hesitantly in the doorway. Santana squirmed in the chair. Being surrounded by all these people was too overwhelming. On top of everything Santana's parents had also come into the room and so had Carmen.

"I'm gonna kick some serious ass." Carmen said, sounding irritated.

"Carmen, don't." Santana said firmly but was ignored.

"I warned her about this." Carmen continued.

"_It's not her_ _fault_." Santana whispered but Carmen still wouldn't shut up.

"I guess she really is stupid..."

"It's not her fault!" Santana repeated louder and stood up off the chair. Everything seemed to clear up and she felt the sudden need to find Brittany. If this was what she was going through, even at best, Brittany was probably feeling a million times worse. Santana ran out, leaving confused expressions on everybody's faces. With a quick visit upstairs she changed her clothes and grabbed her car keys. She met Emma on her way downstairs again and threw her arms around her wonderful friend.

"Thank you." She murmured into the hug and felt Emma nod against her.

"Anytime." Emma replied and then let Santana on her way to find Brittany.

* * *

><p>Santana drove fast. She even ran a red light which was unusual for her. When she made it up to their apartment she was a little out of breath and her legs were itching with nervous energy. While calling Brittany's name over and over again she frantically looked through every room but couldn't find Brittany anywhere.<p>

She sunk down on the couch and banged her fists against her head as she tried to think of other places where Brittany might be hiding. Then it suddenly hit her. Of course. She made her way down to the car again and drove to the storage facility where Brittany's yacht spent every winter. The entrance was unlocked and she went inside. The climbed up on the ladder and found Finn out on the deck.

"She's here, isn't she?" Santana asked and startled him a little.

"I think she wants to be alone." He answered.

"I don't care what you think." Santana snapped and went inside. Brittany wasn't in the kitchen, or the living room, or the Jacuzzi. The last place Santana looked was the bedroom where she finally found Brittany passed out on the bed, still in her wedding dress, hugging an empty bottle of tequila.

"Sweetie." Santana cooed and pried the bottle away, putting it down on the floor. She crawled up on the bed next to Brittany and wrapped her arms around the blonde who grunted quietly but clung to Santana without waking up.

Santana rocked her calmingly and stroked her hair. Brittany felt almost feverish against Santana and she was slightly shaky. Santana tried to hold back her tears but she couldn't. They streamed down her face like a running faucet. Santana continued to rock Brittany gently and stroking her, and as the hours passed by she quietly sung song after song.

Time was blurry, reality was blurry. All Santana needed was to hold Brittany and make her feel safe again. She hated herself for insisting on a stupid wedding and for making Brittany run away and try to escape. Santana was supposed to be her escape not her reason for escape. Santana's guilt was overwhelmingly washing over her in waves but holding Brittany's warm body made everything better.

As long as she could hear her deep breaths, as long as she could stroke her silky hair, as long as she could feel her milky skin that was all Santana needed and would ever need.

Suddenly Brittany jerked and startled Santana. The blonde forced a hand over her mouth and threw herself out of bed and into the bathroom. Santana realized what was happening in a matter of seconds and hurried after Brittany. She held her hair and rubbed her back as the blonde emptied the content of her stomach into the porcelain bowl.

"_It's okay."_ Santana whispered over and over again as Brittany vomited. Even when Brittany had nothing left to throw up her gag reflex wouldn't give her a break. She retched repeatedly until it broke into sobbing instead. She lifted her head away from the mess she just made and Santana was quick to lean forward and flush it away.

Brittany exhaustedly sunk down and rested her head in Santana's lap. Santana took a couple of strands of Brittany's hair and brought it to behind the blonde's ear. Brittany's forehead was a little sweaty but Santana didn't care as she let the back of her hand run along the side of Brittany's face over and over again soothingly.

"How long have you been here?" Brittany's frail voice suddenly asked. She had been so deep in her slumber that she hadn't realized Santana was there until the moment she woke up in her arms.

"A couple of hours." Santana answered softly. "Are you okay?" Santana asked as gingerly as she could. Brittany pressed a palm against the floor and hoisted herself up to a sitting position again. She nodded slowly.

"Yeah, fine. I'm just gonna…" Brittany said quietly and looked at the sink where a toothbrush had caught her eye. When she stood up again she felt a little light headed and grabbed the sink to keep her balance.

"You sure?" Santana was nervous about insisting on anything right now but she needed to be sure. Brittany nodded again and turned to the mirror over the faucet.

"I'll wait out here." Santana said lovingly and kissed Brittany's shoulder before going back to the bedroom. Brittany rinsed her mouth with water, brushed her teeth and gurgled mouthwash. She splashed some cold water on her face and breathed into the towel as she dried it off.

Then she went back to Santana who lifted the covers aside and invited Brittany in. The blonde offered a faint smile and took off her dress before crawling in between the sheets. She tangled her legs with Santana's and rested her head on the Latina's chest. She felt Santana's strong arms tighten around her hard.

"I'm sorry I was such a cold bitch earlier." Santana said and kissed Brittany's head.

"I shouldn't have pushed you. I should have just comforted you. It's my job to-" Santana continued lovingly. Brittany shook her head.

"It's not your responsibility." She interrupted quietly.

"Yes, it is." Santana argued.

"No, it's not." Brittany insisted.

"Yes! It is."

"Santana…"

"Agree to disagree?" Santana suggested jokingly and kissed Brittany's head again. Brittany giggled and nodded slightly. She loved how Santana could make her laugh even when something like this was plaguing her mind. They rested quietly against each other for a while.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Santana asked tentatively. She didn't want to push but she also didn't want to seem like she didn't care, like she wasn't there for Brittany.

"Not tonight..." Brittany answered after pondering for a while. She had been sleeping for a couple of hours but she was still exhausted. She felt Santana nod understandingly.

"Whenever you're ready." Santana murmured and snuggled closer.

"It's just... I wasn't prepared." Brittany said suddenly and broke the calm silence. "I've had my whole life to prepare but I wasn't ready…"

"I don't think you could ever be ready…" Santana said and shook her head.

"It wasn't like I was expecting her to be alive, really…" Brittany added quickly like she was trying to explain herself.

"You were hoping." Santana cooed softly. She didn't blame her for that. No one could.

"Stupid." Brittany muttered. Santana put her hand under Brittany's chin and guided her head up which forced their eyes to find each other.

"It's not stupid, B. You're not stupid." Santana said firmly and stroked the blonde's check. Brittany crawled up to a more upright position and fidgeted with her bracelet. Santana thought she looked so small and fragile and it broke Santana's heart every time Brittany's eyes looked like that.

"I'm really, really sorry about your mom." Santana said gingerly and had to wipe away some tears from her own cheek. Brittany smiled weakly and assisted Santana with her thumb.

"I'm sorry about the wedding." Brittany said and looked down in her lap like she was ashamed.

"Honey…" Santana cooed comfortingly to let Brittany know it didn't matter. Brittany grabbed Santana's hand and played with the ring on her finger.

"Do you still wanna marry me… even after I just walked out like that?" Brittany asked bashfully and was a little afraid to meet Santana's gaze. She was scared she had messed everything up. Santana gave a dopey smile.

"Yes, silly. You could push me off a cliff and I'd still want to marry you." Santana ensured. Brittany threw her arms around Santana's neck and kissed her in the crook of it. She started to cry again. Her sobs shook the hug and Santana did everything she could to calm Brittany.

"Let's go to sleep." Santana offered and used her pinky finger to wipe the tears away from Brittany's cheeks. Brittany lay down and curled up to a little ball. Santana snuggled up behind her and for once she was big spoon. She ran her hand along Brittany's arm until she reached the blonde's hand to interlock fingers. They were both tired from the emotionally draining day but before she could relax Brittany just had to be sure of something.

"You know I'd never push you off a cliff, right?"


	37. Chapter 37

Friends, lovers and readers! I regret to announce that I will have to go all Glee on your asses... I'm going on a week long trip with my school and I tried to twist and turn it so that I'd be able to keep the updates coming anyway, but sadly I have been unsuccessful. Which means a tiny little **hiatus until next Sunday. **But let's not worry about that and just think about tonight ;)

**CHAPTER 37**

**"Love is thicker than ketchup"**

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><p><em><strong>March 22nd<strong>_

* * *

><p>Brittany had been so distant lately. She had been a little lost in her thoughts and not as happy and smiley as Santana was used to seeing her. Given the circumstances it was very understandable and Santana tried everything to support and help her, but Brittany kept insisting that nothing was wrong which made it really difficult.<p>

There had been no talk of another wedding and there hadn't been any sex either. Not that Santana really needed those things but the absence of them made it even more clear that Brittany wasn't okay. Brittany still hadn't talked about it despite Santana ensuring, time after time, that she was there to listen anytime, any place, always.

Instead Brittany spent a lot of time on the phone with the people investigating her mother's case and Santana could see her being so frustrated with never knowing enough. The remains had been sent to an anthropologist and a few things could however be determined.

The body had been in the wall for approximately 20-25 years which fit the time of the disappearing. There were signs of long-term drug use but the cause of death was blunt force trauma to the head. Santana had no idea how any of this was found out but she imagined someone like Dr. Brennan in a super high-tech lab looking at the bones and stuff. After the examination a funeral had been held. Santana had hoped that that would offer Brittany some closure but it was like Brittany wasn't even there.

Sometimes Santana woke up in the middle of the night without Brittany beside her, and when she tiptoed up she found Brittany crying in the bathroom or on the couch. Santana tried everything. Singing to her, reading to her, making her hot chocolates, bringing her blankets, just sitting with her, but every time ended with Brittany saying that she _'just needed to be alone for a while'_ and Santana going back to a cold, lonely bed.

This morning when they woke up it was obvious Brittany woke up on the wrong side. She also didn't wake up on Santana's side of the bed, which meant Santana woke up without Brittany's arms around her which meant Santana woke up on the wrong side too. Santana read her mornings like they were horoscopes and whenever Brittany was turned away from her or not even in the same bed Santana knew the day would be a little shittier than usual.

Santana bent down to look at the fries she was heating in the oven. She had brought home a crappy fast food meal in hopes that that would make Brittany a little happier. They hadn't talked that much today and Santana was desperately grasping at straws but they kept snapping off. So she gave Brittany some space for a couple of hours and went shopping. When she came back Brittany was sleeping and she didn't want to wake the blonde, even if it would have been to feed her.

But when Santana heard the shower running she decided to heat the meals she had bought for them. Except re-heating turned in to just adding a few spices which turned into just adding a few ingredients and now she had pretty much changed the whole dish. For the better though. Brittany came into the kitchen in pale jeans and a green tank top. Her blonde hair was wet and made the top darker wherever the water dripped on it.

"Hi." Santana said tentatively. Brittany nodded hello but didn't say anything. She went to the fridge.

"Are you hungry, baby?" Santana asked despite it seeming rather obvious.

"Yeah…" Brittany answered hesitantly and looked through all the shelves in the fridge.

"I have fries and burgers… if you want?" Santana offered, still carefully, since Brittany seemed to be in a very reserved mood. Brittany smiled with her lips but it didn't spill over in the rest of her face or her eyes.

"Yummy."

At least she said something positive, Santana thought.

"Two minutes." Santana said with a kind smile and bent down to look at the fries again. Brittany set the table for two and pretty soon Santana came with the food. As soon as Santana sat down Brittany stood up. When she came back she had the ketchup in her hand.

"You can't have ketchup." Santana stated like it was a crime of some sort.

"Why not?" Brittany questioned and sat down again.

"I made this dipping sauce. It's really good." Santana explained. She wasn't a big fan of ketchup herself. It just kind of overpowered all the flavours and took over the dish.

"I'm in the mood for ketchup." Brittany argued.

"But the fries will go better-"

"I want ketchup."

"No, but I added-"

"Geez, Santana! Would you just let me eat the fucking ketchup?" Brittany hollered, interrupting Santana for the second time. Santana sat with her mouth open, trying to process the fact that Brittany just yelled at her. With a curse word no less. Lately that hadn't been all that unusual but Santana still couldn't get used to it.

"Yeah, of course." Santana said quietly with half a shake of the head. She wanted to kick herself. She knew better than to push Brittany like this. She redirected her attention to the food on her plate and after adding a big red blob of the sugary tomato purée; Brittany did the same.

They ate in silence. Santana almost wanted to leave the table. She wasn't sure where she could look. Staring at her plate felt stupid, but looking at Brittany felt even scarier and looking around the room would just make her look dumb so she tried to find a balance between the three that would appear normal, but it really just made it even more strained.

It was so quiet that they could hear whenever someone swallowed extra loudly or chewed on a fry that had become crunchy from the time in the oven. Santana caught herself chewing extra slowly to avoid making those noises whereas Brittany found herself eating more quickly to get them over with sooner. Brittany finished her plate first and threw a nervous glance over at Santana. Was she supposed to wait for Santana to finish too? Or could she leave? Santana saw the blonde squirming in the corner of her eye.

"You can go if you want." Santana said quietly, without lifting her gaze from her half eaten burger that apparently was extremely interesting at the moment. Brittany waited for three more seconds and then she stood up, taking her plate with her to the kitchen and putting it in the dish washer. She could have taken the other way, through the vestibule to the living room to the hallway and to the bedroom, but she felt like that would make Santana think she was avoiding her so she went back to the dining room and took that way to the living room.

In the doorway she stopped herself with a hand on the doorframe. She didn't think Santana was doing anything wrong. She had been really wonderful actually. But Brittany didn't seem to be able to help herself from snapping at her, from pushing her away, from keeping her out. She didn't want to but it was like a brick wall that was too thick to break through despite both of them trying. Brittany had to offer her something though.

"Thanks." She said over her shoulder. She remained frozen for a couple of seconds like she was waiting for Santana to answer but the Latina didn't know what to say so pretty soon Brittany shuffled out of the room. Santana looked at her burger again. It wasn't interesting at all. Her apatite was completely gone. Santana didn't think she was doing that much wrong. She knew she was bad things like this but she really tried her hardest all the time. It was like she couldn't win.

She didn't blame Brittany for being sad, she had every right to be, but it couldn't be like this every day for the rest of their lives. Santana had no doubt in her mind that she would stick around even if it was, but she wasn't done trying to make it better. Love had to be thicker than ketchup.

She got up and threw away the rest of the food on her plate. She went to look for Brittany and found the blonde on the bed, hugging a pillow under the covers. Santana hesitated in the doorway but then went to sit down on the edge of the bed.

"Brittany…" She began slowly.

"I'm fine." Brittany shot back quickly, already in defence mode again.

"I know." Santana said calmly. "… except that you're not." She argued after a little while.

"Santana, I don't feel like-"

"I think you need to talk to her." It was Santana's turn to interrupt. Brittany sat up and threw the pillow aside.

"She's dead, Santana." Brittany shot back spitefully. Santana took a breath to remain calm and not yell back. She knew that wouldn't help.

"Just because she can't listen with her ears doesn't mean she can't hear you." Santana said softly, feeling her hand twitch with want to put it comfortingly on Brittany. But she knew better than to test her luck at the moment so she held it back.

Brittany sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it. She knew Santana was looking at her but she just couldn't meet her gaze. She slid to the side of the bed and stood up. She took a couple of steps towards the door but Santana's voice stopped her.

"When my Abuela died…" Santana said loudly in hopes that it would make Brittany stay. Brittany turned back around but didn't sit down on the bed. She looked at her feet and fidgeted with her bracelet while she waited for Santana to continue.

"When my Abuela died, the last thing she had said to me was that she never wanted to see me again. Ever. And she had kicked me out of her house and we hadn't talked for over a year. Then one day here in New York my mom called me and told me she had died." Santana talked slowly, tracing the lines in her palm with her index finger like it would lead the way.

"I was so angry with her. I felt bad that I was angry with her because… she was dead, but I was _so _pissed that she had left me without giving me a chance to fix things between us. All I ever wanted was for her to love me again. It wasn't fair, it just… wasn't fair." Santana took a little pause. She hadn't thought about her Abuela for a long time and it stirred up some old feelings. Santana didn't want to cry right now though, somehow the thought of that made her feel selfish.

"So I got on a plane back to Ohio and after the funeral I went to her grave and I talked to her. I told her everything I felt and I told her all the things I had never gotten a chance to say to her face." Santana couldn't help that she needed to wipe her cheek. She had been at that cemetery for hours but she still remembered every second of that talk. She still remembered every word she had said.

"It's not the same. But it helped me." Santana finished gently and finally lifted her head to look at Brittany. She caught a quick glance of Brittany's back as the blonde left the room. Santana sighed and leaned back on the mattress with a thud. It seemed hopeless. Did Brittany have to be so stubborn?

"Are you ready?" Santana heard Brittany's faint voice break the silence and it surprised her a little. She propped herself up on her elbows and saw Brittany wearing her coat and shoes.

"What?" Santana asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"You're taking me, right?" Brittany asked and coyly leaned against the doorframe.

"I…-" Santana managed to utter. She was still a little stumped and not really caught up to speed.

"Please?" Brittany pleaded. "I don't wanna go alone."

Santana finally wrapped her head around what was going on and hurried to her feet. She put her arms around Brittany and hugged the blonde tightly. And finally she felt Brittany hug her back and cling to her without walls around her heart.

"Of course I'll take you."

* * *

><p>Brittany undid her seat belt and looked out the window. She glanced over at Santana with that bothered look that reads '<em>do I really have to<em>?'

Santana offered a safe smile in return and got out first. She walked around the car and opened Brittany's door for her, reaching a hand inside for the blonde to take it. Brittany let herself be assisted out of the vehicle but didn't let go of Santana's hand afterwards.

They walked slowly, hand in hand, to the place where Brittany's mother was buried. The closer they got, the slower Brittany walked and it was almost like Santana dragged her the last couple of yards.

"It's okay, baby." Santana said softly and put her palm to hug Brittany's cheek with encouragement.

"I'll be right over there." Santana added and pointed to a bench further in on the cemetery grounds. Brittany looked at the tombstone, then at the bench and then at Santana.

"Take as much time as you need." Santana cooed lovingly before wandering off to take a seat and give Brittany some privacy with her mom. Brittany watched Santana until she was a small blob on a small bench before reluctantly turning her attention to the carved stone. Brittany hadn't been here since the burial but she paid for maintenance so it had fresh flowers and looked pretty.

"Hi… mom." Brittany almost whispered and looked down at the long stemmed tiger lily she had bought on the way and now held with both hands. That was the flower her dad had given her mom on their first date. Brittany had heard the story of the first date a million times when she was little. It was her favorite bedtime story. She closed her eyes and told it to herself a couple of times in her head to calm herhelf. She didn't know how long she stood there and just listened to her father's voice in her head but even if it had been hours everything seemed to be moving so fast. There was a struggle between dreading to start the talk and wanting to have it over with.

"How are you?" Brittany asked awkwardly but followed it with a snort. That was a stupid question, but she didn't know how these things worked. She felt so silly talking to someone who wasn't there. She looked around and saw an old couple walk past her on the pathway behind her. Suddenly she felt too far away, like she had to speak so loudly from where she stood to make her mom hear her so she squatted down in front of the stone and read the name over and over again. Sofie Meer Pierce.

"I'm fine." Brittany said after a long moment of silence, like her mother had answered and returned the question.

"I _was_ fine. I was really good." Brittany's legs were starting to hurt from squatting like this and it was hard to keep her balance so she just leaned forward and let her knees dig into the grass. It was a little wet and made dark circles on the jeans over her kneecaps but she didn't really care.

"But I'm not so good right now…" Brittany confessed quietly. She took a deep breath.

"I'm mad at you… but it's not your fault." Brittany's hanging head suddenly shot up.

"Actually, I take that back. It is your fault. I'm mad at you because dad and I weren't enough for you. I'm mad at you because you had to get your kicks elsewhere and I'm mad that it got you hurt!" Brittany blurted angrily. She didn't feel silly anymore. The words just sort of bubbled up inside of her and they had no other way to go but out.

"I wondered… I wondered for so long where you were. I had to go my whole life wondering and I've gone my whole life hoping you would come back. Then I find… I find that you're never coming back." Brittany's voice faded and her lip trembled as she said the last part. She took a moment to just breathe. She started to feel things she hadn't let herself feel before and it was overwhelming to be thinking all the things that were spinning around in her head. She didn't know right from wrong and she couldn't tell up from down.

"I miss you…" Brittany whispered frailly.

"I miss who you should have been." Brittany corrected upon realizing that she never really knew her mother well enough to miss her. She wondered how it was possible to barely have any memories with this woman and still love her so much. So much it ached.

"I wish you could have been there for everything. My first dance recital. My first motor cross practice. My first A. My first time on a plane. My first date. My graduation. My first job. My first apartment and… look over there." Brittany said and pointed to the bench where Santana was waiting patiently.

"That's Santana. She's my fiancée. We were supposed to be married already but that… yeah… I wish you could have met her." Brittany said and suddenly felt a drop hit her hand. She hadn't realized she was crying but even being aware of it now, she didn't bother to wipe the tears away.

"She's the most amazing person I've ever known. I love her so much. And I really wanna share it with you because… you're so special to me." Out of all the things Sofie had missed; not meeting Santana was the one that hurt Brittany the most.

Even if Brittany wasn't wishing for some sort of Gilmore Girls relationship she still whished she could have called her mom after her and Santana's first date. She wished they could have had her over for dinner and have her help with the wedding. She wished she could have someone who kept going on and on about grandchildren. All the little things. Brittany would never have the little things.

"You missed it. You missed all of it." Brittany sighed and put her palm flat against the cold stone material.

"But you're my mom and you're here now and…" Brittany said quietly.

"I have never told you… or maybe I have but I don't remember it and I wanna say it anyway… I love you." After she said it; something went through her. Like a liberty of some sort and she felt warmer inside. She had to stand up to be able to breathe. Brittany imagined her mother standing by her side. Maybe she was there, maybe she wasn't, Brittany would never know. But she maybe she didn't have to know. As long as she felt it.

Brittany fumbled in her pocket for her phone and pulled it out. She texted for Santana to come over here and in the corner of her eye she saw Santana shoot up from her seat and come closer. When there was just a couple of feet between them Brittany reached her hand out and Santana reached hers out too and slipped her hand in Brittany's. They stood side by side for a while.

"Santana, this is my mother Sofie. Mom, this is Santana..." Brittany said and felt Santana's grip on her hand tighten.

"It's really nice to meet you, Sofie." Santana said lovingly, looking straight at the carved letters on the stone and gave a nod as a greeting. Then Santana turned to Brittany who was already looking back at Santana. They stood there for a while longer and the spring breeze played with Brittany's hair. Her cheeks were a little rosy from being out in the cold and her wet jeans made her even colder. But the cold just added to her sense of freedom. Everything she had been carrying around for so long was finally off her chest. She would never know exactly what happened or why but this still felt like closure… except it didn't have to be good bye.

"What day is it today?" Brittany asked. Santana lit the screen of her phone.

"Sunday, March 22nd." She answered without knowing why Brittany wanted to know.

"I wanna do this every year." Brittany stated and finally put the tiger lily down on the top of the tombstone. It looked really pretty and Brittany felt the corners of her mouth pull upwards into a tiny smile.

"That's nice." Santana said simply but with so much warmth in her face. Brittany felt a million lbs lighter. Not like everything was magically fixed all of a sudden but like she could go back to living. Like instead of a big mountain standing in the way of everything, she had a little rock that she could hold in her palm and carry with her all the time.

She read the letters spelling her mother's name one more time before turning to walk back to the car. Their steps gnarled against the gravel path as they walked and their held hands swung slightly back and forth between them. Santana was just about to slip out of Brittany's hand to walk to the driver's side of the car when she felt Brittany clench harder and turn her so they were face to face. Brittany was tearing up again and put her arms around Santana's neck. Santana caught her and held up the part of Brittany's weight that the blonde couldn't hold herself.

"_Shh, sweetie, I know, c'mere_." Santana comforted and hugged Brittany's waist, pulling her impossibly close. Brittany sobbed over the Latina's shoulder and Santana felt the blonde's chest heave in a hiccup-like manner as she cried. Santana wondered how Brittany could have so many tears but she wanted to be there and offer a stroke, a hug, a kiss, for every Brittany tear would ever cry.

"I'm sorry I've been so off lately." Brittany managed to get out.

"You haven't…" Santana tried but it just made Brittany cry louder.

"Is that why you're crying?" Santana asked worriedly and felt Brittany nod against her. Brittany pulled away and sniffled. She wiped under her nose and along her jaw line where a lot of her tears had gathered in anticipation of falling down. Seeing Santana's dark orbs look at her in that loving way like she was the most beautiful thing the Latina had ever seen, even when she was a mess like this, Brittany felt a warm tingle that started in her fingertips. It travelled up and warmed all of her until it had formed a smile. For the first time in weeks she smiled a smile she actually felt on the inside too.

"How could you know what I needed when I didn't even know?" Brittany asked and her raspy voice reminded her that she had been crying five seconds ago.

"I just wanted to help." Santana cooed bashfully and glanced down at the ground in the same coy manner.

"I'm pretty sure a normal person wouldn't have put up with me." Brittany said with a chuckle.

"Yeah, but I'm like herpes. You're stuck with me for life." Santana joked and Brittany giggled, erasing any lingering desire to cry some more. She took Santana's hand again and brought it up between them. She looked down at their fingers so perfectly fitting together and then up at Santana who was already waiting to meet Brittany's blue eyes.

"You did this for me… thank you."

* * *

><p>I know it wasn't a wedding but at least it wasn't a cliffhanger before the hiatus. SEE YOU NEXT SUNDAY :D<p> 


	38. Chapter 38

I'M BRINGING SEXY BACK, YE! Lol, no just kidding. Hello fellows, here I am. Put your American s...- No seriously, here I am again with a new chapter fresh from the oven. I dunno, I'm in a weird mood and freakin ecstatic to be back! I'm having the worst case of PMS known to man (seriously studies should be made) and it has sucked to not be here! I just missed you, that's all.

Now for the bad news... I'm taking this course and it's killing me. Slowly. Painfully. So my updates might not be back to superduper regular, the way I like them but you know me and I could never leave you hanging for too long!

Also, in honor of my return; _*cough* review-whore *cough*_ let's bring it way past 700, shall we? :)

**CHAPTER 38**

"**Do you hear that, love?"**

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><p><em><strong>May 16th<strong>_

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><p>It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, there were no clouds in the sky and there was barely any wind at all. The whole week had had almost the same wonderful weather but it was like it peaked today. Like it knew.<p>

"San, can you pass me the sun block?" Brittany asked from her seat in the lounger. Santana was nowhere near the sun block but she was on her feet by the railing, admiring the horizon. That was her favorite part of going on the yacht, seeing how the horizon never became smaller or bigger no matter how far or fast the boat was moving. And how other ships, no matter how grand would eventually appear small enough to fit in the palm of her hand if she held it up. But she didn't mind tearing her eyes away from it to wait on her lovely fiancée and giving her the bottle of milky lotion.

"Do you want me to rub some on your back?" Santana asked and took the cream back from Brittany since she expected the answer to be yes. Without really waiting for an answer she took a blob of it in her hand and motioned for Brittany to sit up straight. Santana straddled the lounger behind Brittany.

"Cover your boobies." Santana said playfully and tugged at the strings of Brittany's bikini. Brittany lifted her hands and held the cups of material in place as Santana began to massage the lotion over her shoulder blades. Brittany was pretty tense, and since she was already at it, Santana took a couple of minutes to work the knots in her back. Brittany hummed in pleasure.

"That feels really good, San." She purred and hung her head down lower.

"Urrrgh, get a room." Carmen muttered without even opening her eyes. She was lying on a towel on the deck and basking in the sun. Santana snorted but with a quick kiss on Brittany's neck she tied Brittany's bikini again and stood up to let the blonde go back to relaxing in the warming sun.

"I made lemonade." Emma chirped as she emerged from the interior, carrying a large tray with several glasses and a pitcher on it.

"Here, let me get it." Puck offered and put little Nathaniel down to reach for the heavy tray. Nathaniel wasn't happy with not being held by his daddy anymore so he tugged on Puck's trunks to signal that he wanted up again. He was 14 months old by now and he was walking and doing some talking. Emma took one of the glasses and poured a little sip of the lemonade into it before letting Puck serve the others. She hunched down to her little son.

"Here, Natie, do you want some lemonade?" She asked him and he nodded excitedly.

"What do you say?" You can never start too early when it comes to teaching manners. Nathaniel let his chubby baby fingers dance with each other as he tried to think of the right word.

"Peese." So he wasn't great with pronunciation yet but it was close enough.

"That's right. _Please_." She chirped happily and let the little boy drink by himself. He spilled pretty much all of the glass's content on his shirt but he was still happy with the drops that had gotten in his mouth and played with his taste buds. Santana watched the whole scene in awe and thought it was the cutest thing ever. She glanced over at Brittany, and when she saw the blonde watching too, she had to smile. Brittany looked a little shy when she saw Santana staring at her and lowered her sunglasses from her head again and turned her face towards the sun.

"Mrs. Lopez, would you like some lemonade?" Puck asked Gabriela after serving Rachel and Quinn a glass each.

"Call me Gabriela." She insisted before giving her answer. "And yes please. Could I have two glasses? Álvaro must be thirsty after all the roaming around in the fishing equipment." She continued and looked towards the back of the boat where she could hint her husband trying to cope with the fishing rods and baits.

"There's fishing equipment?" Puck asked excitedly and glanced over at Emma who was smiling back amorously at him. He put the tray down and let Gabriela serve herself as she hurried to the back where he joined Álvaro.

"Do you have any tots? I'm hungry. Isn't it lunchtime soon?" Mercedes complained from her seat.

"Ask Finn." Brittany said and pointed to where Finn was.

"Isn't he like… driving the boat?" Carmen questioned sceptically and propped herself up on her elbows. She was more than interested in this conversation because she was starving. She hadn't eaten since last night and that was stupid airplane food. They left on the yacht at nine this morning and everyone had breakfast on it but Carmen was never good with eating in the morning.

"Yeah, he's the captain but he has a Second Mate to take over so whatever you want he'll cook." Brittany explained.

"Where are we going again?" Santana interjected with curiosity. Brittany shrugged her shoulders.

"I dunno… just away I guess." She answered casually. They were doing this weekend trip with all their friends and in honour of the Lopez family visiting but Brittany had been so busy planning everything else that she had completely forgotten to pick a location. She giggled at herself and leaned back further. She kind of liked the idea of not really having a location in mind. She trusted Finn would take them some place great. Carmen and Mercedes skipped of together to go satisfy their growling bellies.

Santana saw that the pitcher of lemonade was almost empty and her first instinct was to refill it but then she thought of something much funnier. She brought it inside and rinsed it out. Then she filled it with water and snuck her way closer and closer to Brittany.

Brittany had her eyes closed, her dark shades on and she was enjoying the sun all the while rocking out to her favorite song in her mind so she wasn't at all prepared when water suddenly hit her stomach and chest and trickled cold trails down her sides. She shrieked and shot out of the lounger, looking around to find the guilty perpetrator.

Santana was bent over laughing but when she lifted her head to look at Brittany and saw the look on Brittany's face she hesitated for a second. Brittany was amused with Santana's frightened expression and as much fun as it would be to torture her by pretending to be upset she couldn't help but charge forward and rub her wet skin all over Santana who started laughing again and tried to hug Brittany tightly to still her from smearing more of the wetness on her.

It was a warm day but being wet was just enough to spread goose bumps over both Santana and Brittany's bodies. Santana squiggled closer to steal more of Brittany's warmth.

"You'll be sorry you did that…" Brittany said revengefully in Santana's ear. Santana was hoping the revenge had something to do with sex because watching Brittany walk around in a skimpy bikini all day was really working her up. Santana peered up at the other people on the deck and then she parted her lips slightly to kiss Brittany where her lips were already pressed against the blonde's skin. It was a little salty and Santana darted her tongue out to taste more if it.

"Have you two never heard of a room, like seriously?" Carmen said and interrupted Santana's journey over Brittany's shoulder. Santana hadn't even noticed the return of her sister or Mercedes, but once again she obliged to her sisters wishes and pulled away from Brittany gently. Brittany was smirking at her and Santana could see the blonde's mind being up to something.

"What?" She asked suspiciously and squinted for full suspicious effect.

"I didn't do anything." Brittany said and put her arms up, but the smirk wouldn't go down.

"Finn said lunch would be ready by two." Carmen said casually without anyone really asking. Santana nodded at the statement and directed her eyes to a clock.

"So what do you wanna do the remaining hour?" Santana chirped and looked around for a fitting activity.

"Karaoke!" Rachel exclaimed and even stood up off the chair in her overpowering excitement. Everyone agreed to Rachel's suggestion and made their way to the living room. Rachel and Brittany sang the first song, followed by a solo from Rachel. Then it was Rachel's turn to sing with Quinn and then Rachel sang with Santana. Brittany snuck away unnoticed and headed to the kitchen where Finn was cooking up a storm.

"Hey…" She said gently in the doorway. "I wanna stop for a second." Brittany continued. Finn froze and dropped what he was doing instantly.

"Not you, silly. I wanna stop the boat." Brittany explained further with a little giggle.

"I'm kinda busy here, Britt." Finn said, although without sounding like too much of a douche.

"I know. You don't have to do it; you just have to tell me how to do it." Brittany said and offered him a smile. Finn smiled back and offered to show her instead. They walked together to the wheelhouse and Finn showed her all the buttons that were relevant when something else caught Brittany's eyes.

"Who's that?" She asked curiously and pointed to a framed photo she hadn't seen before.

"My parents on their wedding." Finn answered coyly, a little embarrassed about decorating without asking Brittany first.

"They're on a ship." Brittany said questioningly with furrowed eyebrows to match.

"Yeah, it's something about being on international waters and having a shipmaster to perform it…" Finn explained. He didn't really know how the exact rules were but his parents had gotten married at sea so there was some way to do it.

"A shipmaster? That's like you, right?" Brittany asked hesitantly.

"Yup." Finn said proudly and tapped the steering wheel lightly like it was his son. He looked at Brittany as her mind wandered off.

"Anyway…" Brittany said and shook her head. "Just stop it for a little while." She continued and reached her finger out but had already forgotten which of the buttons would do the trick.

"What you guys talking about?" Santana said in the door which startled Finn and made Brittany turn around.

"Just… how I need some help… in the back." Brittany said, her voice going up and down like a roller coaster as she was trying to make it up as she went along.

"Finn was gonna do it, but he's busy so…" She continued.

"No, I'm not." Finn said and shook his head.

"Yes, you are." Brittany argued and tilted her head to ask if Santana wanted to take his place.

"Sure, I'll help." Santana chirped. Before leading Santana out, Brittany gave Finn and the buttons meaningful glances and hoped that Finn was smart enough to get the hint.

"So what's up?" Santana asked when they had gotten to the back. She didn't really see anything that needed to be dealt with.

"It's down here." Brittany said as casually as she could and went down the ladder to the swim platform almost at sea level. She could see how transparent this whole thing was but Santana followed her down without a clue as to what was going on.

"What do you need me to do?" Santana asked again since there was still nothing apparent she needed to assist with.

"I need you to stand right here." Brittany said and firmly grabbed Santana by the shoulders with both hands and guided her to where she wanted her to stand. Even after having locked Santana in place she didn't let go of the Latina's shoulders. Santana furrowed her eyebrows at Brittany and saw the playful, giddy look in the blonde's eyes. At that moment she noticed the boat no longer moving and she realized what was happening.

"No, Brittany, don't!" She exclaimed but before she knew it Brittany was twisting her body sideways which made her loose her footing and fall. Santana's hands flew up in reflex and she grabbed a hold of Brittany, dragging the blonde with her down into the cold blue. As they hit the surface they let go of each other to prepare for having to swim.

Santana could feel the freezing water coat her almost in slow motion and when her head sunk under water her arms shot down to push herself up again. It took a couple of seconds before she had floated to the surface and she could her Brittany shriek from the cold before she had even gotten her ears above water level again.

She inhaled deeply when she was finally allowed to breathe again and she saw Brittany's cute face and happy smile. Santana's eyes were wide and she couldn't get used to the cold water chilling her body. Brittany seemed to almost be enjoying it and swam a little further away from the platform. Santana realized there was a platform and headed for it with fast strokes.

The ladder wasn't down so she had to heave herself up using only her arms. With her legs gliding under the platform and her wet body and clothes making it extra heavy it took her couple of tries to get to up. When she finally did she lay down flat on her back and breathed heavily from the shock and exhaustion. With great effort she lifted her head and looked down at her wet jeans shorts and soaking, unbuttoned flannel shirt. She started laughing and soon she heard a giggling Brittany swim closer and struggle to climb onboard again. It didn't take long though before she had Brittany's face peering down on her and the blonde let her whole body rest on top of Santana.

"That'll teach you to never pour water on me again." Brittany said, a little out of breath but with a beaming smile. Brittany was dripping all over the Latina and her wet hair was either sticking to her own face or tickling Santana's. Santana stroked it away and while she had her hand on Brittany's cheek she pulled her down for a kiss. Their lips were wet from the salty water but all Santana could taste was Brittany.

Brittany was having a little trouble not grinning hugely in to the kiss so she pulled away to just smile at Santana. Her blue eyes sparkled and her left eyebrow was a little ruffled. There were a few pearls of water on her forehead and her wet skin shimmered in the sun. She had on that smiled reserved only for Santana and a strand of hair sticking right to the corner of her mouth. Santana watched as a drop of water formed big enough to drip off Brittany's bottom lip.

"You're so beautiful." Santana murmured, afraid to close her eyes for a second and miss something.

"Marry me." Brittany blurted suddenly.

"Yeah, that's the plan." Santana chuckled.

"No. I mean marry me. Now. Today." Brittany sat up and pulled Santana to sit up too. Brittany squiggled closer in her straddling position over Santana until their upper bodies pressed against each other. Santana felt heartbeats against her chest but couldn't figure out if they were her own or Brittany's. Their foreheads rested against each other and the close intenseness of their eye contact was intimate in an almost intimidating way.

"Marry me." Brittany whispered again.

"Is that even possible?" Santana asked tentatively and Brittany could feel Santana's forehead crinkle against her own.

"I think so…" Brittany answered and nodded slightly. Santana brought their lips to meet again and parted hers to take Brittany's bottom one in her mouth. Brittany moaned quietly and kissed back hungrily, putting both her arms around Santana's neck and crushing their breasts together.

"I love you, Santana." Brittany mumbled into the kiss before letting her tongue flick over Santana's top lip to ask for permission to enter. Santana tangled her tongue with Brittany's in response and tasted Brittany's words. They were so sweet she couldn't get enough of them, and she basked in the fact that she didn't have to. Oxygen was running low and Santana had to pull away. She did it slowly, letting the side of her nose stroke against Brittany's on her way.

"Let's get married." She breathed and opened her eyes only find Brittany's clear blue ones already zeroed in on her.

* * *

><p>The lounges had been folded away, the fishing equipment cleared, and every beach ball and inflatable bathing ring had been brought inside. Emma had spent the last two hours decorating the deck romantically and setting it up perfectly. Finn had changed into a suit and was nervously rolling his thumbs. He was suffering from a bit of stage fright and he felt the pressure to not mess it up. He had no idea how to perform a wedding ceremony, other than what he had seen in the movies. He was relieved to find that Brittany and Santana wanted to do their own vows, because that would have been the hardest part.<p>

"How much longer?" Rachel asked Finn impatiently as she passed him on her way back to the room where Brittany was being pampered by Quinn. Getting to international waters was taking forever.

"I, uuuh…" Finn said hesitantly since he didn't have an answer. Rachel was in serious stress mode. She wanted everything to be perfect and she wasn't going to let some giant ruin everything.

"You know what? At some point you just gotta learn how to focus and stop being such an idiot. Go check!" She scolded but didn't stick around for the answer, she was much to busy. She had to return to Brittany.

"Found something." Rachel announced as she closed the door behind her with a backwards kick.

"That's a tiger lily." Brittany stated and eyed the flower Rachel was holding up in front of her.

"Yeah, so? It was the only kind you had. Here, let me just…" Rachel mumbled oblivious to the meaning of the delicate flower and cut the long stem to a shorter stump before sliding into Brittany's hair. Brittany could see a hint of the large flower in the corner of her eye and she had to smile. It felt right. Maybe Sofie would watch this from somewhere.

"How do I look?" Brittany asked bashfully and gave a little twirl, making her white sundress dance around her thighs. Quinn looked at her stunning friend. Brittany's face was radiating joy. She had a pinch of a tan from the hours in the sun and her summer freckles could be hinted on her nose and cheeks. Her hair was combed to one side, and on the side without the beautifully flowing golden hair was the orange lily. Her lashes went on forever, as did her neck. The dress might not have been a traditional wedding gown but it was absolutely perfect. The way the thin straps rested on her shoulders, the way it tightly hugged her chest only to let the rest of the fabric play freely down to slightly above her knees, the way it made her skin look.

"You've never been more beautiful." Quinn said sincerely. She pursed her lips and clenched her jaw to keep from crying.

* * *

><p>"Are you sure you don't want me to-?" Álvaro asked for the hundredth time but Santana cut him off.<p>

"No, dad. We want it this way." Santana said lovingly. She felt a little bad about not letting her father give her away when he was so excited about it, but there was always Carmen's wedding…

"Okay, mija." He said understandingly and put his hands on her bare shoulders. He pulled her closer and pressed his lips softly against her forehead.

"I love you so much, Santana." He whispered against her skin and let his lips linger in the same spot.

"I love you too, dad." She whispered back and let her hands slide from where they had rested on his chest to his back.

"Hi…" They heard softly from the door. Álvaro turned around and was met with Brittany's rosy cheeks. He immediately got the hint and cleared his throat.

"I'll be out there." He mumbled and took a couple of steps to leave. When he was in level with Brittany he stopped.

"Take care of my girl." He said playfully and flicked over the blonde's nose. She giggled.

"I will." She said matter of factly and smiled crookedly at him. She watched until he closed the door behind him and then Brittany turned her eyes to Santana. She was breathtaking.

Her long, wavy hair reached to below the swell of her breast and framed her face gorgeously. Whenever Santana dressed up she liked to go for red lips but now, with just a little gloss on them, they looked more delicious than ever. Brittany could never get used to Santana in a strapless dress. How her neck and chest moulded together and how her collar bones looked so kissable. How her right shoulder showed that little mole and oh lord, how that dress accentuated her waist. The colour was creamier than plain white and in contrast with her dark skin it looked almost like someone had mixed vanilla sauce with caramel and swirled it around.

"I can't believe I get to be with you for the rest of my life." Brittany cooed. Santana's smile grew.

"I can't believe… any of this." She said and lightly walked over to Brittany only to have the blonde hurriedly meet her halfway. Brittany's strong hands wrapped around Santana's waist and lifted her off the floor in a twirl. It made the butterflies in Santana's tummy go wild and her grin widened further as she met the deep blue pools that were Brittany's eyes.

The blonde stopped and slowly lowered Santana back down to the floor. She felt Santana's hands slide down her arms in the same pace, except they kept going until they had interlocked their fingers on both hands and brought them up. The only sound was the water hitting the hull as the boat travelled forward, but it was okay. Their eyes said enough. Every so quietly a tune could be distinguished, probably playing out on the deck. Brittany eyebrow rose slightly as she listened and recognized it at once.

"Do you hear that, love? They're playing our song." She murmured amorously and let one of her hands part with Santana's, only to place it on her hip instead. Since Brittany was a little taller she tilted her head down and slightly forward to let their temples touch softly as she started swaying them to the quiet melody. Santana let out a content sigh and basked in Brittany's smell, feel… presence. She was like air to Santana, only even more vital. There was a knock on the door that broke the soft dance and they both raised their heads as Finn popped his inside.

"We're here." He said simply and backed out again, letting the girls take their time. They looked back at each other, eyes a little wider than usual.

"We're here." Santana repeated happily.

"We're finally here." Brittany nodded gently and walked over to the door. With one hand on the knob she reached the other out for Santana to take it, which the Latina did and let herself be led through the interior. Brittany stopped before going through the door to the main deck where people were waiting. With Santana by her side she took a deep breath.

"You and me." She cooed and her fingers made sure to tighten her hold on Santana's hand.

"Me and you." Santana cooed back with a loving glance at Brittany who seemed more nervous than the Latina thought she'd be.

"And both of us together."

The door slid open and they were almost blinded by the big sun about to set into the horizon. It was still full and round but it was just about to reach the ocean to sink into it. The colors all around were glowing in red, orange and yellow. The water shimmered with the warm, beaming reflection and the beauty was overwhelming.

Brittany's breath hitched and for a second; she forgot how to move. It wasn't until Santana squeezed her hand that she managed to take the first step onto the deck. Emma had even made an aisle and they were walking up it, towards the sun, slowly. Every step meant the world. This was their moment. Every bump in the road, every obstacle they had to overcome, everything that had ever gone wrong, it was all worth it to live this one right moment.

All eyes were on them, each taking a piece of it and saving it forever.

Brittany glanced down and saw her and Santana's hands like one. That was exactly how it was supposed to be. That was the only hand she wanted to hold. Holding that hand was everything.

Santana tried to keep looking straight ahead but her head kept twitching sideways to get a glimpse of Brittany beside her. That was exactly how it was supposed to be. Brittany was the only person she wanted to walk beside. Walking beside her was everything.

They made it to end of the aisle and turned to face each other, joining both pairs of hands together instead of just one pair. Brittany was wearing her nervous smile but the longer she stared into Santana's dark orbs the more it morphed into something more peaceful. It was funny how looking at Santana calmed her and made her heart beat faster at the same time.

"_Hello."_ Brittany mouthed silently to Santana. Santana looked away coyly before mouthing back.

"_Hi."_

For a while it was just them and the ocean and the sunset. Finn rose from his seat and went up there too, but the silence prevailed as more seconds passed. The friends and family were bubbling with excitement and couldn't wait much longer. Finally Santana and Brittany could tear their eyes away from each other and place their focus on Finn, which gave him enough courage to start and he dove right in.

"When Brittany's father hired me to drive Brittany around when she turned 18, I thought it was just another random job. But here I am not quite 10 years later…" Finn said, sounding slightly awkward as he was making an effort to speak loudly and clearly. He looked at Brittany.

"… I've watched you grow up from a girl to a woman. I've watched you do things most people could only dream of doing, but most of all I've seen you become really, really happy. And it's all thanks to…" He continued, his voice filling with warmth and his awkward smile becoming real. He turned to look at Santana.

"… Santana. I know we don't always get along but I would be lying if I didn't say that you are the best thing that has ever happened to Brittany. The love you two share is remarkable. Is incredible. Is beautiful." Finn took a pause for dramatic effect and you could already hear Mercedes sobbing into a handkerchief.

"And so, it's an honour for me to be here today and join you together in holy matrimony." Finn lost his train of thought. Was there supposed to be more here? What felt like eternity to him had in reality only been a few seconds but he couldn't think of anything to say and he couldn't stand the anticipation in everyone's faces.

"Let's do the vows. Santana?" He said and managed to sound like he was completely in control. Santana felt her heart jump at being up first. It hadn't been difficult to write her vows and it hadn't been difficult to memorize them. Saying them couldn't be that hard. Still, her hands felt a little shaky and her heartbeat was pounding in her throat. She took a breath and as she did, a breeze blew in, chilling her face, playing with her hair and bringing Brittany's scent over in the wind.

"I love you, Brittany. I wake up every morning more in love with you than ever. I fall even more in love with you even time I see you. And whether we're 27 or 87, I know this feeling will never go away. From now until eternity_; I just want you_. I take thee, Brittany, as my wife." Santana's voice was steady, she had never been surer of anything in her entire life. Brittany beamed at Santana and waited a couple of seconds to let all of it sink in but she wanted to say hers so bad she almost flinched excitedly when she saw eyes turning to her.

"I love you, Santana. I love your laugh, your scrunchie nose, and your ticklish earlobes. I love when you come home in the evening and tell me about your day. I love how your tongue sticks out the corner of your mouth when you concentrate really hard. I love the way you kiss my cheek every morning and I love every second of how I feel when I'm with you. From now until eternity; _I'm so yours_. I take thee, Santana, as my wife." Brittany's smile was so big her lips almost had trouble forming the words. Santana's lips, however, pursed as a small tear teased in the corner of her eye and fell over the edge. Brittany knew it was a happy tear but she was still quick to lift her hand and wipe it away with her thumb.

Because of the impulse nature of this wedding they didn't have wedding rings to exchange. Santana drew Brittany's hand up and closer and placed a gentle kiss on her ring finger as a promise to put a ring on it, and as a promise for better or for worse, in sickness and in health. Brittany took Santana's hand and lifted it with both her own, until her puckered lips pressed against the smooth skin on the Latina's ring finger as a promise to put a ring on it, and as a promise to love and cherish until death do them part. Finn smiled at them.

"By the power vested in me by… someone, I hereby pronounce you lawfully wedded as wife and wife." He pointed with his whole hand first at Brittany and then at Santana. He let his arm fall and just watched their beaming grins. He was almost as if hypnotized by their intoxicating happiness. Brittany threw a glance over at him.

"Finn?" She whispered hesitantly.

"Yeah?" He answered and directed his attention by turning his head to her.

"May I also kiss her?" Brittany asked quietly with a little giggle. Finn straightened out his posture almost as if a little startled. He cleared his throat.

"Right. You may now kiss the bride." He said loudly and ceremoniously and then slipped away and took a seat. Partly because he was a little embarrassed about messing up the end and partly because he felt awkward being up there when they were about to kiss, like he was stealing from their moment.

Brittany took a step closer and her hands snaked around Santana's waist, drawing her into impossible closeness. Santana's neck lengthened in anticipation as it stretched to reach the kiss. With her jaw tiled slightly upwards and sideways, Santana's lips parted as she waited for Brittany to complete her.

Brittany's lips lingered for a second, relishing in the sensation of Santana's warm breath on them. As she closed the final gap; Brittany's eyes were open a tiny crack and she glanced down at Santana's plump lips moulding to hers as they interlocked. It was like clouds colliding; soft tenderness mashing with sparks and electricity.

Santana's stomach jolted with newborn infatuation as the inside of Brittany's top lip pressed down on the inside of her bottom one. The pleased crowd filled the air with a quiet _'aw' _and Brittany couldn't help but smile; the corner of her mouth pulling away from the kiss as she herself pressed closer. Her arms left Santana's waist and instead she wrapped them around the Latina's neck in an incredibly tight embrace.

The now half sun was still peering at them as they parted and let the delicate sunlight seep in between their still close faces.

"Dance with me all night?" Brittany murmured, almost not finding the words as Santana's striking beauty kept washing over her like an ocean with never ending waves. Santana's eyelids closed for a moment as her lips melted to a content smile.

"I'll dance with you forever."


	39. Chapter 39

Wedding night... It's not that kind of chapter though. LOL just kidding! Yes, it is!

I did something here, (you'll know what when you get there) and I hope it doesn't ruin everything. I just sorta really wanted it but I didn't wanna have it as a chapter on its own earlier so… ANYYYWHOOOO! I don't have all that much to say today which is weird because it's me and I'm a blabber mouth but I guess you'll just have to make due with the chapter :)

OH! This course of mine ends (I have the final test) on March 28th so after that I'm hoping to bring back regular updates because I hate living like this. I need structure, yo.

**CHAPTER 39**

**"L'étoile d'amour"**

Santana tightened her grip further. By now her hands were on her own opposite elbows in the hold she had around Brittany's waist and she kept pressing herself closer and closer. Her cheek was completely mashed against the blonde's back and her face was scrunched up with eyes closed because she kept getting hit in the face by large splashes of water.

"Don't you think we're going a little too fast?" Santana hollered loudly, despite the proximity to Brittany's ear, in order to be heard over the motorboat engine and the way it kept hitting the water hard over each wave.

"But it's so much fun!" Brittany shouted back.

Fun? Santana's hoodie was soaking and the wind was making it freezing cold. It was really dark outside and whenever Brittany made a little turn of the wheel it felt like the boat would capsize. Santana was beginning to think that leaving the yacht was a mistake, but then again; she didn't want to spend her wedding night with her parents in the next room. It was Brittany's marvellous idea to take the tiny motorboat to '_this place she knew_' and Santana still had no idea where or what.

Santana didn't want to say it but she couldn't hold back anymore.

"Brittany… I'm scared." She wasn't sure if Brittany would hear her because she hadn't been that loud this time but within seconds they had slowed down so much they were barely moving forward. Santana let go of Brittany to let her turn around in the seat they were sharing. Brittany giggled a little when she saw Santana's pouty, wet face and dripping hair. The blonde had been more protected from the water by ducking behind the wind shield and having Santana wrap around her.

"It's not that much further." Brittany comforted and hugged Santana snugly before realizing the fabric on her back was completely drenched through. Brittany shrugged back as if a little startled and squinted her eyes in a concentrated scrunchie face as she contemplated what could be done.

She pulled the hoodie over Santana's head and fumbled through a bag before replacing it with a new one. Then she also pulled out a big scarf, a rain coat and a southwester hat she tied under Santana's chin. Santana could see a hint the bright yellow hat shielding her forehead and snorted.

"I must look like an idiot." She muttered, but was feeling a lot better being warm and dry again.

"Cutest wife I've ever had." Brittany said playfully with a casual shrug of her shoulders.

"Britt, I'm the only wife you've ever had." Santana stated and tilted her head. It wasn't supposed to come out all mushy but the thought of it was so heart warming that she couldn't help the smile spilling over in her face. Brittany wiggled her eyebrows and showed her white teeth in the dark night.

"I know." She said like it was the best part and pecked Santana's lips once before sitting down in front of Santana and brought up the speed to maximum again. It didn't take long though before she slowed down again. Santana lifted her head and looked around to find the destination but they were still surrounded by water.

"Do you wanna try it?" Brittany asked suddenly and looked over her shoulder at Santana. "It's fun, I promise."

Santana wasn't sure how she felt about this. She didn't know the first thing about driving a boat. Is it even called driving when it's a boat? What does that spoke do, and how does she know where to go when there are no roads?

"I- uh… I-" Was all she had time to say before Brittany stood up and squeezed herself in behind Santana instead.

"Let me help you." Brittany said softy close to Santana's ear with their cheeks grazing against each other. The blonde's front was flush against the Latina's back, her hands reached around her to access the dashboard just as well as Santana. Santana's mouth fell open slowly and heart started beating faster. She wanted it bad, but she was pretty sure the hat was a mood kill so she tried to concentrate on learning.

"See that little light over there?" Brittany asked gently, like a kindergarten teacher, and pointed to what Santana was supposed to be seeing. Santana looked and even leaned closer but all she saw was darkness.

"No." She breathed out and shook her head slightly. Brittany took Santana's hand and lifted it for the Latina to point too.

"It's right… there." Brittany instructed, her words dragged out and painfully slow. Santana bit her lip to not moan. She was just about to turn to kiss Brittany when suddenly she saw it. It was faint and almost looked flickering in the great distance.

"I see it." She said quickly and excitedly, afraid to take her eyes off it and lose it again.

"That's where were going." Brittany informed slowly. Santana wondered if Brittany knew how sexy she was being right now, but was distracted when the blonde's fingers slid over her arm to her hand and brought it up to the spoke. Together they gently pushed it forward and felt the wind in their hair grow firmer as the boat travelled faster.

Santana felt a tingle in the pit of her stomach, the same as the one when you go on roller coasters, and she let out a half laugh at the surreal feeling of controlling the powerful vessel. She held the steering wheel with both hands, per request of Brittany's motioning, and gripped it right.

"Just keep your eyes on the light and relax. You'll steer there automatically." Brittany stated and wrapped her arms securely around Santana's waist. Santana loved every second that passed in this state. She felt like goddess of the seas or like a movie heroin bringing her girlfriend to safety. Put simply, she felt badass as hell and it was awesome.

When she grew comfortable enough to let go of the wheel with one hand she loosened the ribbon under her chin and within a millisecond the hat had blown away into the darkness behind.

"Oops!" She said like she had nothing to do with it but while wearing a mischievous grin Brittany couldn't see. It was a stupid hat anyways. It was messing with Santana's mental picture of how awesome she was right now.

The light was getting bigger and brighter as they were closing in on it fast. Santana moved out of the way for Brittany to steer the last bit and dock at the pier, which wasn't really a pier; it was more of a small, wooden jetty where you could tie your boat.

Santana looked up at the island. It was high, but small. It was no bigger than being on one side of it and still seeing the water on the opposite side. It would probably have taken no more than 15 minutes to walk all around it. And taking up what felt like all the space was a single house in the middle of everything.

The house had huge windows, almost like it was built entirely in glass to not miss the view from any angle. Santana looked a little closer to where she was standing, now with feet on solid ground. There was a lot of stairs to lead you up to the house and a big sign with bold letters reading '_PRIVATE PROPERTY'_. She squirmed uncomfortably, maybe they weren't supposed to be here. Brittany tied the last knot and stood up straight.

"Welcome to _Brittany_." She beamed and opened her arms wide to take everything in. She took a deep breath of the salty air. She hadn't been here in forever.

"To what now?" Santana asked sceptically and leaned closer to hear better this time.

"To _Brittany._ Dad named it after me when he bought it." Brittany chirped like it was no biggie and started skipping up the many steps with light feet. Santana followed, still confused.

"Wait? You have an island?" She questioned, lifting her feet faster to catch up with the bouncing blonde in front of her. "How do I not know this? Isn't that the type of thing _your wife_ should know?"

Brittany didn't answer, she just continued hopping upwards step by step. How did her legs not get tired? Santana's thighs were already burning.

"Shouldn't we, you know, already know everything about each other?" Santana asked, more tentatively this time and with furrowed eyebrows to question why Brittany wasn't answering. Brittany reached the top and stopped, waiting for Santana.

"Why?" Brittany asked short-winded but with a smile when Santana stood in front of her, slightly hunched over from trying to catch her breath.

"Because we're married" Santana answered matter of factly.

"Just because I know you doesn't mean I wanna stop _getting to know you._" Brittany said happily as a kind of explanation.

"Marriage isn't a destination." She added and reached her hand out, playing with the hem on Santana's raincoat sleeve.

"It's not?" Santana asked hesitantly and a doubtful wrinkle formed between her brows. It was beginning to look like the one Álvaro sometimes got, and it had nothing to do with anything but Brittany had to smile at it before continuing.

"No. It's a journey. Like… before we travelled on or own, then we travelled side by side for a while and now we're travelling hand in hand." Brittany explained and let her fingers slide between Santana's. Santana stood quiet for a while, watching their interlocked fingers intently. The silence made Brittany nervous.

"Maybe it was a bad analogy..." Brittany suggested after a while.

"No!" Santana interjected quickly. "It was nice."

Brittany's bubbly mood returned quickly and she gave a skew smile. The night was moving along and it was getting colder. The wind didn't exactly help.

"You're shivering." Santana observed and gave the house longing glances.

"I'm soaking. How did you sit in the back for so long without complaining?" Brittany asked playfully and lifted aside a heavy potted plant and reached into a hole under it. She pulled out a key and put the plant back. She had done this a couple of times. Sometimes when she came out here the pot had blown into the ocean and the key was gone, so she started putting it in a hole and had a bunch of spare ones at home. If a storm got really bad they had to do work on the house too, but it was worth it.

The door opened and they pushed themselves inside, stumbling over their own feet in the longing for warmth. Santana felt around. It wasn't windy anymore but it was just as cold as outside.

"B? It's not warm in here." Santana stated hesitantly and looked around. The place was really pretty. There was a fireplace with a sofa and a big plant that had almost managed not to die. On the one wall that had no windows hung a huge piece of art over a wide bed with cream colored sheets. There was a kitchen and a few doors leading to rooms Santana couldn't see. The best part was the skylight and the million stars playing in the darkness above. The city has so many lights you can barely ever see the stars but out here they were everywhere.

"So we'll have to keep each other warm" Brittany cooed. She placed a few logs in the fireplace and lit it, but in the big open space it would take a while before they would even begin to notice a difference. Brittany held her hands, open palms, over the flames. She couldn't find a balance; they were either too close so it burnt or too far away; not soaking up enough warmth. Santana tugged on her shirt from behind and Brittany stood up only to have Santana envelope the pale fingers with her own. She rubbed them and blew hot air on them.

"That's warm" Brittany whispered contently when Santana's lips grazed against her thumb accidentally after giving another puff of hot air. Santana smiled a tiny smile and puckered her lips to kiss again - intentionally.

She kissed each fingertip, each knuckle, each palm and the back of Brittany's hands before moving on to the wrists. It was like ice against her boiling lips and prickled the sensitive skin. She let her lips linger longer until they had warmed a spot before moving on to the next.

The sleeves of Brittany's hoodie clung to her arms and were sticky against Santana's face. Brittany unzipped it and pulled it off her shoulders, but instead of effortlessly falling to the floor she had to pry her arms out of the moist fabric. It revealed the pretty summer dress she was still wearing underneath and her goosebump-covered arms.

All Santana wanted to do was take the clothes off her back and dress Brittany in them to keep her from freezing but instead she watched as the rest of the blonde's clothes fell to the floor as well. Brittany's nude body was so cold. But she looked so peaceful and serene. And she was so, so beautiful.

It suddenly hit Santana how much she wanted to give everything to Brittany. How much she would sacrifice to make Brittany happy, and she realized that they hadn't been celibate at all the last two months.

"Look, B, I know this isn't exactly how you wanted it…-" Santana said softly, with almost apologetic eyes as she watched Brittany back up towards the bed.

"But it's exactly what I wanted." Brittany interrupted lovingly, her voice so certain of the words she spoke. She lay down on the bed. It wasn't in the giddy way she did when she was in the mood for playful sex. It wasn't the way she leaned back slowly with her back arched the way she did when she was in the mood for sensual, sexy sex. It was the vulnerable way, just like she had when they made love after the visit to Sofie...

* * *

><p><em>Santana walked into the bedroom, her shirt already halfway off and she carelessly discarded it by throwing it on a chair. She missed, but she still proceeded to yank the jeans off her legs instead of picking it up. She was pretty tired. Things had been intense lately and all around sleeping hours had been few. She was just about to undo her bra when she saw Brittany just standing, not doing anything, in the middle of the room.<em>

"_Are you okay, sweetie?" She asked carefully and her head cocked to the side as she tried to interject eye contact into Brittany's gaze. _

"_I'm…" Was all that came out before Brittany's voice faded. Santana got worried again but figured the blonde was maybe just in need of some sleep. She closed the distance between them and slid her fingers under Brittany's tank top to lift it over her head. Her fingertips brushed lightly against the blonde's torso and she felt Brittany shiver at the touch. Santana opened Brittany's jeans and her palms travel down the milky legs as she brought the thick material down. _

"_Let's go to sleep." Santana cooed gingerly when she stood up straight again and motioned for Brittany to get on the bed. _

"_No." Brittany almost whispered. Santana processed and accepted the rejection of her suggestion and was just about to offer Brittany a million other things they could do. What she wasn't prepared for was Brittany's panties falling to the floor, quickly followed by the bra. _

_She looked so fragile the way she was still in the same spot on the floor, now naked and looking at Santana with big eyes pleading. Brittany backed up with a few slow steps and sat down on the bed, her hands digging into the mattress on each side of her. Santana looked as Brittany's eyes didn't leave her once, even for a second. _

_There was a hesitation lingering in Santana's mind and Brittany read it like a book. It wasn't until Santana took a shaky step closer that Brittany scooted herself farther in on the bed and lay down slowly, the cold going through her as more and more of her back met the mattress. _

_She was still staring Santana, who couldn't help but desire to touch the beauty on the bed. When Santana too took her last tiny articles of clothing off; Brittany's face softened. Like a mask of insecurity fell off and left only Brittany. Santana crawled on the bed next to Brittany and enveloped the blonde's body with her own. She let a strand of hair slide between her fingers on her way to rub Brittany's temple gently with her thumb. She placed three soft kisses on a blonde eyebrow, following its slight curve. _

"_We don't have to do this." Santana murmured gently, looking into pools of forever ongoing blue. _

"_I want to. I want… to feel loved." Brittany's frail voice spoke, her lips barely moving. Santana's heartstrings weren't just tugged at, they were pulled forcefully and wrenched every which way they would go, on the verge of snapping off. She would go to unbearable lengths to make Brittany feel loved. _

_Santana licked her lips and leaned in, placing a wet kiss on the blonde's chest, over her heart. She placed another just beside it and then another and another. Santana kissed every inch of Brittany's body, her big lips not missing a single spot as they travelled over Brittany's smooth skin. _

_It was the longest Santana had ever taken exploring someone's body. It was the slowest she had every moved inside someone and it was the most loving way she had ever touched someone. Brittany was being the most quiet she had ever been but that meant nothing in terms of how Santana was making her feel._

_ As she was rising to fall; her hand closed with a fist of silky raven hair and her nails rasped against Santana's scalp. Santana was looking down at what her hand was doing at the blonde's center but knowing Brittany was close she raised her gaze slowly, taking the long way over Brittany's delicate body and curves. Santana leaned in and kissed Brittany's slightly parted lips, making the blonde's eyes flutter open and find her dark orbs. _

"_I love you." Santana said safely, ensuring it with her mind and body. "I love you." She repeated again and again all through Brittany's pinnacle and the aftershocks of it. It took moments, several quiet, beautiful moments, and then Brittany rolled to her side, her face only and inch or two from Santana's, as the rest of their bodies tangled up in each other. Then Brittany talked. She talked about everything as Santana listened, not interjecting much, but just listening. Come morning time; the pillow was wet and long gone was the ability to tell which tears belonged to whom._

* * *

><p><em>... <em>The memory made Santana smile as the pale starlight gleamed through the window and accentuated every rise and fall of Brittany's breathing. Santana stood frozen, mesmerized by the long legs, the taut stomach, the round breasts of Brittany – so obviously giving herself away completely.

Santana looked, not knowing where to start in her burning desire to take it all in. How many times had she seen Brittany naked? She didn't know. She had lost count a long time ago. Knowing every inch of Brittany's gorgeous body didn't help. It always made her feel this way inside. A feeling she couldn't even explain to herself.

Brittany's limbs always moved so elegantly. Her skin always radiated heat, even now in the freezing cold. Her lips always looked so soft. Her hair always screamed for Santana to run her fingers through it. It was all too much to ever get used to. It was too Brittany to ever get enough of.

Santana took the raincoat off. The hoodie followed and all the warmth she had worked up evaporated into the room. The hairs in the arch of Santana's back stood up as goose bumps spread up her back. The reluctance she would have felt towards continuing disappeared when she caught a glimpse of the tiny smile in Brittany face.

She took her time stripping of the rest of her clothing. She wanted to make every second last forever but holding back was getting increasingly harder. She threw herself on the bed, her skin igniting when it touched Brittany's. One knee pressed into the mattress by Brittany's side as her other leg flung around the blonde, who caught Santana in her arms and used the speed to roll them around. Santana gripped the sheet under Brittany and it followed in the flip, ending up covering their bodies.

Santana's hands moved to the sides of Brittany's face to keep the blonde hair from tickling her and pull her down for a kiss. They both moaned into the longing touch as their lips wetly interlocked. Santana cradled Brittany's head, sliding her fingers through the silky hair, and swung them around so she was on top.

Brittany barely even noticed that but opened her mouth a little more, furiously tangling her tongue with Santana's. It tasted like the chocolate cake Emma had brought, mixed with the glass of champagne they had earlier and a hint of Santana's tropical lip gloss.

Brittany's arms were suddenly unhindered from wrapping around Santana and Brittany's limbs snaked around her in a snug embrace. Santana's hand barely fit between them but she slid it along Brittany's skin and cupped her breast, feeling the blonde slightly pull away from the kiss as her head automatically tilted backwards upon feeling her sensitive nipple poke Santana's soft palm.

Brittany caught herself and brought her lips back eagerly, spinning the both of them around on the bed again. Brittany's breast felt heavier in Santana's hand now, since the blonde was pushing down on her and the Latina moaned at feeling the fullness mould against her hand. She kneaded more fiercely for each circular motion and after a while she had to concentrate to not press so hard it would hurt Brittany, even though she only groaned approvingly at the way her breast was being handled.

She rolled her hips down on Santana who desperately pushed up into Brittany. Santana's butt and lower back lifted off the mattress and she spun them around to have Brittany beneath her again. The needy way they clung to each other was intense in a new sense. It wasn't like a first time. It was much too familiar to be a first time – they knew every birthmark, every crease, every scar of their other half. It was safer than a first time, but in no sense any less exciting. It was a milestone. And it meant _so much_ they had no other way to convey to each other just how much.

Santana dove to kiss Brittany's neck, humming contently against the skin but already missing the soft lips and torn between staying and going back. Brittany kissed whatever she could reach which currently was the right collarbone of the Latina. She loved kissing there. It was hard but yet so soft, and so smooth she felt like just drawing her lips slowly back and forth against them, the way she did when they cuddled.

Santana felt the tender motions and smiled, turning her head slightly to look at Brittany's face, eyes closed, cheeks a little balled and rounder, and forehead so smoothly free from worries. Brittany reacted after a second or two of Santana's lips leaving her neck.

"What?" She half whispered gently.

"I love when you do that." Santana murmured back in reply. Brittany's cheeks warmed up a little and she looked away coyly. Santana thought it was the most adorable thing she had ever seen. She couldn't believe how in love she was with this perfect creation under her. _Perfect for her._ She hugged Brittany's cheek and brought the blue eyes back to meet hers.

"And I love you." Santana said surely, looking straight into Brittany's sparkling orbs. Her eyes flickered to the blonde's lips.

"And I really wanna make love to you." She added bashfully but with her voice a little raspier from desire. Brittany leaned up to kiss Santana, continuing to push upwards until they were both sitting, Santana straddling over Brittany. Brittany lusciously kissed Santana's jaw line, ending up by her ear.

"_Turn around_." She whispered huskily and Santana obliged. She turned, to still sit on her knees with one on each side of Brittany, but now with her back against the blonde's front. Brittany immediately began kissing her neck hungrily, sliding the hair away with sloppy strokes and swirling her lips and tongue over the skin like it was essential for survival.

Santana moaned loudly, letting her head fall forward in pleasure. Brittany's hands toyed over the caramel skin for a while but pretty soon ended up on Santana's front, taking the plump breasts into her hands and massaging. Santana's breathing picked up and grew uneven the more Brittany played with her nipples and when Brittany began gently nipping in the crook of her neck she lost all control. The pooling wetness between her legs was driving her wild.

"Brittany, I'm so wet." She panted with her chest heaving and voice trembling. Brittany moaned at the words and felt the same need for Santana. She leaned back on the bed and soon Santana felt a pull on her hips, urging her to back up.

With her center just above Brittany's face Santana felt wet kisses resume, now on the inside of her thigh, as Brittany lifted her head of the pillow to reach the wet folds.

"_Fuck_." She moaned and her mind short circuited from trying to decide if Brittany's magic tongue slowly travelling up her slit, or the sight of Brittany's sprawled out body in front of her was the most agonizingly sexy.

She dove forward, desperate to taste Brittany's abs and hipbones before snaking closer to the throbbing core of the blonde. She parted the milky legs wider and swallowed hard at seeing the blonde's sex unfold for her. Brittany's face trembled in a loud moan between Santana's legs when she finally felt the Latina latch on to her clit and suck gently all the while massaging it with her tongue.

Brittany reached her hands up and caressed Santana's butt cheeks to feel their incredible softness and to steady herself again. She licked faster, the intoxicating taste spreading across her palette and the feel of Santana in her mouth was indescribable.

The room was filling up with their noisy moans and unstable breathing. Santana parted her lips wide, taking in as much of Brittany as possible and loving every inch of flesh in her mouth. Like a juicy piece of fruit that wouldn't stop dripping, she drank it all and desperately came back for more. She loved how the wetness felt on her lips and the way Brittany smelled was out of this world.

Brittany's tongue found Santana's entrance and teased around it, dipping inside ever so slightly. It was tingly and Santana felt a bundle of pleasure building up in her lower abdomen. She clawed her nails down the inside of Brittany's thigh and let out a serious of little, uncontrollable moans each time the tongue slid inside. She pressed herself down closer, stomachs even more flush against each other, and with warm against warm, the sensation was burning. Brittany was beginning to arch up into Santana and the Latina knew it meant the blonde was getting closer too.

"_Brittany…"_ She breathed quietly against the blonde's sex and reached her hand back, feeling Brittany take it in a firm grip and squeeze it hard. With two lubricated fingers on her other hand she made circles around Brittany's entrance, before pushing inside slowly, taking the time to savour being inside and tending to the right spot with love.

"_Oh God, Santana." _Brittany groaned huskily and her grip on the Latina clutched harder. _"I can't… I'm gonna…" _And with that she tumbled over the edge, quivers going through her as Santana locked her in a peak that lasted several seconds longer than what she was prepared for.

Santana's content humming quickly turned to moaning when she felt Brittany's tongue plunge inside her and dance knowingly to her preferred rhythm. Brittany's panting, hot breath hitting her added to the arousal and in mere moments Santana's body wound tight until she saw stars.

"_Hhhrrrrmmmmm_." Santana uttered, the sounds muffled as she pressed her lips against Brittany's skin. Brittany felt Santana come against her face and kissed softly until Santana's muscles relaxed. Then she exhaustedly rested her head back on the pillow, just smiling contently into the room, licking her lips as if refilling the taste of Santana in her mouth. Santana climbed off her wife's body and lay down next to her, covering them both in the sheet that slid off long ago.

"I love you too." Brittany said, not having forgotten that she didn't actually say it back earlier despite feeling it all around all the time. Santana draped her arm over Brittany and felt a tiny layer of sweat on her as skin rubbed against skin.

She kissed Brittany lazily and they tasted the mix of them it created. Santana drifted off to sleep first and her body sprawled out in the bed, not stealing all the space, just forcing Brittany to share more of it with her.

She had no idea what she was dreaming but Brittany thought it must be something amazing from the way her face curled up into smiles every now and then. Suddenly Santana woke up, and wondering why, she got her answer when she felt lips kissing down her waist and hip. She mumbled something impossible to make out and looked down, finding Brittany sheepishly peering back up.

"Sorry…" She giggled softly. "You looked so delicious…"

"C'mere." Santana chuckled. Brittany's face was on cuteness overload and Santana's heart was doing that fluttering thing where all the giddiness has no place to go. Like when you see a cute kitten and you're almost afraid to pet it because it's so adorable that you're afraid you might actually hug it to death if you do.

Brittany crawled higher, greeting Santana's breast with an '_oh hello'_ when her nose accidentally brushed against it on her way up. It made Santana laugh, which made Brittany laugh, which made Santana laugh harder and after a while their tummies were hurting and both had forgotten what was even funny in the first place. Brittany lay down next to Santana and looked up through the skylight.

"See that star right there?" Brittany asked curiously and pointed to a star shining a little more brightly than the rest. Santana nodded; it was hard to miss.

"That's _L'étoile d'amour_ – The star of love." Brittany informed and glanced back at Santana who furrowed her eyebrows.

"Is it really?" She asked sceptically. She had never heard of that before.

"I have no idea." Brittany giggled. "_I'm trying to seduce you, play along._" She whispered like it was a secret and snuggled closer into Santana's side so her breath teased right by the Latina's ear.

"Well, Mrs. Pierce, if you wants to get your hands on some of this; all you have to do is ask." Santana joked, pointing to her body and kicking the covers off. She just then realized how much warmer the place had gotten. Still, she was more than open to heating things up further.

"Mrs. Lopez, may I please-?" Brittany began innocently, looking down at Santana's exposed skin.

"Uh-huh, yeah, very much so." Santana interrupted eagerly and captured Brittany's giggling lips with her own.

They say that orgasms and laughter prolong life and if that's true; maybe Santana and Brittany will be the first to ever live forever.


	40. Chapter 40

Can you believe that I have become one of_** those?**_ One of those who have to apologize for taking so fucking long with an update. I am wetting myself with shame as we speak (well, as I write and you read) (also, I know... lot's of wetting myself lately). I am sorry though. I'm also sorry that you have no talent. I'm sorry that you sing like you're getting your prostate checked and you dance like you've been asleep for years, and someone just woke you up. KIDDING! Obviously.

But this chapter… well this is what happens you try to write without having time to. I feel like this was all written like five sentences at a time and it's not my finest work. It's also kind of fillery/seed-planting so clearly, I wish I could make a bigger, better comeback (41 will be more fun, promise!) But let's just focus on me being here now, with regular updates for the next (and last) ten chapters. And then I have a new fic coming up after that. Sooooooo, this was long and a bunch of nothing. If you're actually still reading this my hat is off to you... and so is my bra, but that is a completely different story!

**CHAPTER 40**

"**Bad dreams, Beth's schemes"**

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><p><em><strong>July 12th<strong>_

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><p>Santana carefully shifted to her back, slowly withdrawing the arm she had draped over Brittany. The other arm was tangled up somewhere under Brittany's body and Santana couldn't really feel it anymore but she didn't care. She tucked the free one under her head and looked up at the ceiling, smiling at it like an idiot. She didn't even remember why she had woken up. It must have been the middle of the night still, but she didn't feel that tired. She felt kind of giddy.<p>

It had been about a month since they came home from their three-week honeymoon and things were still ridiculously perfect. Everything was just _good_. They hadn't fought in forever. They spent a lot of time with their friends and still had time just the two of them. Breadstix was going great. Santana worked a lot but it was so much fun it barely felt like working. Yes, sometimes the hours were really long, but even those days were perfect because she got to come home to Brittany after hours of missing her.

Being married. It felt different… but still the same… only better. She couldn't really explain it. Meeting new people and introductions were a lot more fun. Before, calling Brittany her girlfriend wasn't always taken seriously. Some people made that face. You know the face. It wasn't that horrible face of disgust. It was the one that tells you that you'll grow out of it. That one day you'll meet the _right_ _man_ and come to your senses. But now, introducing her as her wife people made a different face. It was a combination of surprised, impressed and approving. Santana didn't need a piece of paper to make her relationship with Brittany more real but if others did she was more than happy to throw it in their faces.

That wasn't all though. Domestic things felt tingly. Calling Brittany from the store about buying groceries made her stomach pinch in delight because that's the kind of thing married people do. Folding Brittany's laundry was fun, almost exciting, because it made Santana feel like a helpful wife. Baking cupcakes or pies for Brittany's support group was border lining housewify but right now; that was an amazing feeling.

Brittany stirred a little beside her and shook Santana from her thoughts. She turned her head to look at the blonde's slumber. Brittany's face was a little scrunched up in an unforgiving frown. Santana returned it and wondered what she might be dreaming about to wear that face.

_Brittany walked through a house. She didn't recognize it but somehow she just knew that she knew every room by heart, like she had lived there for years. She wasn't sure what she was looking for but something, an unknown force, kept her moving forward. There were pictures hanging on the wall and they all had a blonde girl in pig tales who couldn't be older than seven, and a dark haired boy who must have been around three. She had never seen those children before in her life and yet she felt… like she loved them very much. _

_Her steps led her further but when she walked past a mirror it was like she could suddenly control her body herself. She stopped instantly and looked at herself. She was the same - same eyes, same lips, same cheeks. But she was older. She wasn't eighty years old but her forehead had lines, two of which were pretty deep. She had faint crow's feet wrinkles in the corner of her eyes, her cheeks were a little flabbier and she had dark circles under her eyes. _

_She traced her fingers over her features. They still felt young under her touch but they didn't change in her reflection. It was hard to tear away from but she lost the control again and her feet started moving. She stumbled over some toys and bent down to pick them up with a feeling like it was just another of the million times she had done this. Her back was a little sore and she rubbed it up and down a couple of times. _

_Before she knew it she was forced to walk again. She was presented with a new room and sunk down in an armchair. It was so soft. Her body had been waiting for this for a long time, she could tell. Suddenly a door startled her and in came Santana in work attire. Not in her chef's clothes but in business wear. A dark pencil skirt with a matching blazer and a briefcase that she put on the floor with a sigh. _

_Brittany suddenly felt warmer and hopped up on her feet again and skipped over to Santana, giving her a warm hug and a kiss the Latina only half heartedly returned. Brittany frowned at the unloving welcome but Santana just continued into the room and lay down flat on the couch with her shoes still on. Brittany didn't like it but bit her tongue. _

"_Did you make dinner?" Santana asked as she reached over to the coffee table for today's paper. Brittany didn't know if she had, so she tried to smell it but there was nothing in the air to suggest it. _

"_I dropped the kids off at your parents'." She said instead, wondering where the words came from and how she knew, but still certain they were true. Santana mumbled something and opened the large pages of the paper. Brittany sat down in the armchair again and now saw that she was wearing a dress. It was no dress she owned and probably wouldn't buy any time soon either. The pattern was floral and not in a cute way - in an old lady way. She felt words coming up again and she was beginning to feel uncomfortable not being in control. _

"_Happy anniversary." She spoke sullenly and folded her hands into her lap like a lonely girl waiting to be asked for a dance at prom. Santana peered up at her from the black letters, then flickered back to read the date in the top corner. She sat up and folded the paper again. _

"_Uhh, yeah, happy…" Santana started. _

"_Ten years, Santana." Brittany filled in with a serious tone. They fell into silence and it was weird. It wasn't like any silence they had shared before. This was awkward, it was uncomfortable, strained. Brittany looked at Santana's face. She was older too. She had puffy bags under her eyes and around her lips were lines just like those of a long-term smoker. She seemed thinner too. Everything that used to be so plump – her lips, her cheeks, her breasts looked like they had been drained of their fullness. Brittany shifted, crossing one leg over the other as Santana ran a hand through her dark hair. _

"_Do you wanna have sex?" Brittany asked suddenly. There was nothing excited or exciting in her voice, just a plain monotone question. _

"_I guess." Came Santana's response. They hesitated in their seats for a while longer and then stood up at the same time, not looking to walk closer to each other but both heading for the bedroom. They got there and stood face to face; inches, long as miles, apart. Brittany didn't like any of this. She wanted to get out of this house but when she tried to move on her own, her limbs were too heavy to even budge. _

_Santana hesitantly craned her neck a little, moving only her head closer without putting her hands on Brittany. Brittany leaned in slowly and it was awkward again. They tried to find a good angle mid-air but it just ended up like weird flinching, tilting and jerking their heads back and forth in the journey to collide their lips. When they got there; it was stiff and they held it there, lips against lips with no one bothering to put passion into it. Brittany could feel herself slowly draining of all warmth and yet a thin layer of sweat began covering her body. _

"_Aren't you going to undress me?" She asked, sounding hopeful and trying to smile. Santana didn't answer. She just scratched her scalp and then reached her hands out, still not coming closer like she was making a point of staying away. The dress travelled up Brittany's body as Santana pulled it upwards and after it fell to the floor Santana's hands came back. When they touched her skin she flinched back. They were so cold she couldn't bear to feel them on her. _

_She bit her lip and remained frozen as the icy hands plainly ran across her skin. Then Santana withdrew them and took her own blazer off. That's when Brittany saw it. The white collar of Santana's shirt had a red, smudged stain in the shape of a slightly curved line. Like a lip. Suddenly the power controlling her let go, but she wasn't prepared to take over so her legs bent at the knees and she fell into sitting down on the bed. She could finally move on her own so she desperately lifted her hand to her lips and started wiping, hoping that red lipstick would smear on her skin. She looked down and saw nothing. She wiped more frantically, her eyes wide and crazier after each time she saw her hand covered in nothing. _

"_Sweetie." Santana said. It sounded far away. Brittany's mind wanted to cry but this body couldn't feel enough to make it happen. She shut her eyes, chanting "no" over and over again. She felt a hand on her cheek and if it was supposed to be comforting it was failing miserably. She flinched away from it, shaking her head, still speaking "no" repeatedly. _

"_Sweetie?" Santana's voice repeated and penetrated her ears again. _

"_Brittany?" Her voice was firmer now. Brittany felt hands on her shoulders and they shook her lightly. It hurt. Everything hurt and it was getting darker. _

"_Brittany!"_

"Brittany, wake up!" Santana said for what felt like the millionth time. She shook Brittany's shoulder a little firmer with one hand while bringing the other to wipe away a strand of blonde hair from Brittany's face. Suddenly Santana flinched back in startle as Brittany drew a deep, hurried breath and shot up from the pillow. Santana sat up too and put her arms around Brittany, whose whole body was heaving as she was trying to figure out where she was, eyes shooting around the dark room furiously.

"You had a nightmare." Santana informed gingerly and pressed her lips on Brittany's shoulder blade. She could feel the cold sweat even through the material of the blonde's pyjama T-shirt.

"It was just a bad dream." Santana cooed comfortingly. "Just a bad dream."

Brittany twisted her upper body around and wrapped her arms around Santana, pulling them down with Santana on top. It was comforting to have Santana's weight on her. She hadn't realized that she was still saying ' no' over and over again, but only reacted to it when the sounds contrasted with Santana's calming shushing. Brittany bit her lip and silenced.

"You have to breathe, sweetie." Santana spoke softly in the crook of Brittany's neck, noticing the blonde's now still chest. Brittany's arms around Santana's neck hugged tighter as she prepared to fill her lungs. It was overwhelming to take in air through her nose again and when she let it out she did so in divided parts, as if sobbing but without tears. She was a trembling mess under Santana who didn't know what to do other than nuzzle closer.

"_Don't do that."_ Brittany whispered almost inaudibly when her breathing was somewhat under control. _"Please don't ever do that."_

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." Santana apologized. She didn't know what for, but that wasn't the important part right now. All she cared about was calming Brittany down.

"I won't." She assured. "I promise I won't." Santana rolled them gently so she was on her back and then pressed Brittany tightly against her chest, all the while murmuring gentle words and pressing her lips wherever she thought they might be needed.

Brittany curled up like a little ball against her and soaked up Santana's warmth. She felt weird. She was freezing but sweating. It was too warm under the covers but it felt like there almost wasn't enough of Santana's heat. It was strange that she had such a strong reaction to a dream. She had had nightmares before but always just shrugged them off. Trying to do that now was impossible. Santana looked at the time. It was 4:05 and Brittany had to get up in three hours.

"Try to go back to sleep." She suggested gingerly "I'll stay awake and be right here, I promise."

Santana ran her hand draped over Brittany lower to the blonde's bare leg. The skin was cold and damp. Nevertheless, Santana's hand never ceased to sooth by tracing up and down, back and forth, all through the night, making every inch of Brittany feel safe again.

"I'm right here."

* * *

><p><em><strong>A couple of days later<strong>_

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><p>Brittany stumbled in the door. The morning meetings and errands were finally done but they had been exhausting and all she wanted to do was cuddle with Santana for a while. She heard a second set of keys jiggle in the other room as she pulled her own out if the key hole. Her lip shot out in a pout. Santana was leaving already. Still pouting, she walked to the kitchen where Santana was slurping up the last of the coffee in her cup and put it in the sink.<p>

"Hey, honey." Santana greeted excitedly before she had swallowed the liquid so a couple of drops leaked from her mouth and stained her shirt. She looked at it for a moment and contemplated whether she was actually gonna bother changing.

"Aaah, fuck it." She growled quietly and left it there.

"You're not gonna change?" Brittany asked amused and swooped closer, her fingers effortlessly sliding under the hem of the shirt and grazing against Santana's hipbone just above her low-cut jeans.

"I'm already late." Santana replied and patted her pockets to make sure she had really put the keys in one of them. She wore that face she made when she was going over a check-list in her head and then leaned forward for a quick kiss before rushing off.

Brittany looked around in the empty kitchen. Her days could get boring when Santana worked and all their friends worked and she... didn't really work. She did things. She did a lot of good things. She knew that, and feeling lazy wasn't really the problem. It was the time. She had so much it seemed. The support group and the managing of charities plus the occasional organizing of fundraising events was work, but it wasn't like a full time job. It also always seemed to clash with Santana's working hours so they kept passing each other, just like today.

She missed it. She missed having a boss, an office, co-workers, deadlines, and even though she wasn't running low on cash any time soon she also missed the pay check like a receipt of a month's hard work. Did she want a job?

"I dunno... Maybe" she murmured to herself, deep in thought. A buzz startled her and it wasn't coming from her back pocket where her own phone was safely planted. It came from the counter where Santana had forgotten hers. She walked closer to it. It was a text. She wasn't snooping or anything but the screen was lit so she couldn't help but see the name. _Beth._

Brittany knew exactly who Beth was. She was that stupid bartender at Breadstix. The one with the adorable laugh and cute dimples. The one who was so funny that Santana often walked through the door with a _"hey, guess what Beth did at work today?"_ followed by such hysterical laughter that she couldn't tell the story for minutes, and when she finally did; Brittany never found it funny at all. Beth was the girl who got the biggest tips out of everyone and she wasn't even serving food. She was the one with the low-cut jeans that made her ass look perfect and the short tank tops that always slid up slightly and revealed her toned stomach and belly button ring. She had bigger boobs than Brittany and she got to stand there all night mixing drinks with a shaker so that maybe Santana would see them jiggle. She was the one with the long, blonde hair always up in a tight ponytail that highlighted her cheekbones. She was freakishly nice and sweet and so naturally; Brittany didn't like her, at all.

The memory of the dream she had the other night seeped into her mind and she bit her lip. She tried really hard not to think about it. It was just a bad dream. Just a dream. A dream. The screen went black but she lit it again and slid her thumb across the screen slowly to reveal the message.  
><strong><br>****Beth: Where r u? I thought we were meeting early 2day?**

Wait? What? Meeting early? Why? It buzzed again and then once more, two new bubbles with letters appearing on the screen.

**Beth: I have hot gossip on Sebastian's night out with Kurt!**

**Beth: Ha! I see you**.

Okay, Beth! Take a chillpill! It was by complete accident that Brittany's finger grazed the screen once more and scrolled up. There were a lot of texts. She didn't read them, she wasn't snooping. She just accidentally saw that the two texted a lot. Brittany and Santana didn't text that much anymore. Usually only for convenience reasons like "_buy milk_" or "_home in 15_". Sometimes Brittany sent cute messages to Santana when she was bored at home but Santana usually didn't see them until after she had gotten off work so she rarely replied. But she always acknowledged them when she came home with a "_you're the cutest_" or "_thanks for the sweet text_" or sometimes a kiss or cuddly hug.

When they had just moved in together they would sext each other from different rooms and see who was the first to cave in and come to the other. Brittany still had them. Santana's sexts were too hot to erase. Clearly, Santana was busy texting other people nowadays. If she liked texting so much she probably needed her phone. What a good wife would do right now was to go to Breadstix and return the phone. Brittany just wanted to be a good wife. It had nothing to do with jealousy. She just wanted to do the right thing. So she pocketed Santana's phone and left with her purse over her shoulder. She could have walked. It wasn't that far but still she hailed a cab. She just wanted to do the right thing faster. That's all it was.

The back door to the restaurant was unlocked. It always was after Santana had gotten there. After the one time she locked herself out after throwing garbage in the dumpster out back; Santana always made sure to leave it open. Brittany kept insisting that she keep it locked just in case a murderer or mugger tried something before the rest of the staff had arrived and she was all alone but Santana was too stubborn.

It came in handy now though. Now Brittany could just walk in. She half expected, or maybe she hoped, that Santana would be in the kitchen cutting vegetables or something but it was empty and still untouched for the day so Brittany proceeded towards the front. Within seconds she heard Santana's familiar laughter from the other room and Brittany peeked trough the round window of the swing door to the dining part of the restaurant.

Santana had thrown her head back in the laugh where she sat on a stool and held on to the bar counter to not fall backwards. Behind the bar Beth giggled softly. She was leaning over the counter, resting her underarms flat against it to support herself. Her hands were dangerously close to Santana's and Brittany was not fond of their proximity to each other. That's what they did? They met earlier, so it was just the two of them, free to gossip and flirt?

Brittany busted through the door more violently than intended and approached them. They were both a little startled but their faces didn't look as bothered as Brittany had expected. Hello, she had just caught them! Santana's smile even burned brighter and she extended her arm, wrapping it around Brittany and pulling her in close enough for Santana to press her lips hard against Brittany's cheek. Brittany blinked in surprise. That was nice.

"What are you doing here, babe?" Santana chirped in question, still a little flustered from the previous laughter fit. That's when Beth pulled her hands to herself and stood up a little straighter. Aha! So Brittany had been right, Beth was flirting! It made Brittany's skin crawl and so instead of answering Santana's question she sucked Santana's bottom lip into her mouth. A kiss a little more intimate and lasting a little longer than considered casual in public. Santana cleared her throat after the surprise and for a moment all three were awkwardly quiet.

"Oh my God, Britt! Beth just told me THE funniest story about a customer from yesterday. You have to hear it! Tell it again!" Santana suddenly spoke, the last of her words directed to Beth. Brittany had always had a vivid imagination but she could have sworn Santana's eyes sparkled a little more after they turned to Beth who giggled coyly for a moment before cocking her head first to the left and then to the right like she was getting ready to enter a boxing rink or something.

"Okay so-" was all she got out.

"Mmhm. That's nice" Brittany interrupted, her tone short and not even looking at the bubbly blonde behind the bar. Beth's face looked a little startled and Santana looked offended. Crap! Brittany had been rude! She hadn't meant for that to be out loud.

"I m-mean..." Brittany stuttered, hoping to find words to save the situation. Getting Santana pissed was not the right tactic for this... for anything really.

"...I would love to hear it but I'm in a bit of a rush." she explained and watched with wide eyes for a second before she realized they were both waiting for an elaboration.

"I'm meeting Quinn." Quinn was working today and Brittany knew that somewhere in the back of her mind; Santana knew that, but it was all Brittany could come up with.

"I just came to bring you your phone on my way. You forgot it on our kitchen counter." Brittany hadn't needed to say '_our'_. '_The'_ kitchen counter would have been just fine. Even just '_counter'_ would have been fine but '_kitchen'_ gave it a sense of home and '_our'_ meant Brittany's and Santana's together - _as in don't mess with it, Beth! _Brittany pulled the phone out of her pocket and placed it on the bar. She went for a final kiss on the lips but Santana turned her face just slightly so Brittany ended up kissing the corner of her mouth.

"See you at home?" Brittany asked and waited for Santana to confirm it. The Latina smiled and nodded but Brittany could tell she still wasn't one hundred percent happy with her. Brittany's last steps before she reached the kitchen again were a little harder against the floor. When she was sure that Santana and Beth couldn't hear; a little grunt from deep in her throat droned through her lips in frustration. It wasn't her fault that Santana plotted secret love meetings with pretty blondes that obviously wanted to fornicate all over the restaurant floor...

* * *

><p>For those who are really invested in the story; <strong>Beth<strong> is named that after Quinn's baby because I've tried to stick to almost only using characters from the show, but I was kinda running low on names… Obviously she's not a baby so you can either picture baby Beth all grown up OR see the girl I'm picturing. She's a Cheerio from the Troubletones. REALLY cute! I reblogged a gif set of her on Tumblr which might be easier to check out than desperately going through season three to catch a glimpse.


	41. Chapter 41

I'm so happy to be back! However, once again ff is being a bitch. We'll just have tp power through it, okay? :)

Side note (way to the side, in a box to left like Beyoncé would have said) : I'm taking care of two cats this week and I'm kinda constantly afraid of them. I mean, I have actually touched both of them now so we're basically BFFs. But who knows how to get cats to like you? (One I'm allowed to feed how I want so obviously that's working well, but the other is like Lord -Tubbington-fat and on a special diet...)

**CHAPTER 41**

"**Handyman"**

There was a knock on the door. Three hard thuds. Boom, boom, boom. Santana looked down at, and flattened, her T-shirt. Like an over-sized, plain white T-shirt needed to be fixed. It could either hang loosely or hang loosely. She was a little nervous though. The knock repeated itself and she finally hurried to the door and opened it.

"Hi there, miss. I'm here to fix the fireplace."

There was an accent she couldn't really put her finger on. Not that she really listened; her jaw was too busy falling to the floor.

"Britt, you were out in the hall like that?" She questioned as wide eyes inspected every last inch of the woman in front of her. Brittany was wearing big jeans overalls with nothing, no shirt, no bra, no nothing, under it and from the angle Santana was standing she could even see Brittany's nipples. Brittany was carrying a toolbox that Santana hadn't even noticed she had taken with her, and she had tucked her hair messily into a large baseball cap.

"Santana…" Brittany warned with a serious tone.

"I'm sorry." Santana apologized and stepped aside. "Welcome, oh you mighty handyman. Come into my home with your exposed nipples." She spoke ceremoniously and made exaggerated gestures, throwing her whole body into their movement.

"Santana, be serious." Brittany sighed and put the heavy toolbox down.

"I'm sorry!" Santana said again, louder this time and with her hands up in defence. "It just feels silly." She continued with a little shrug.

With a fast push on her hips Santana was suddenly pinned to the wall with one of Brittany's legs pressing against her center. Her breath hitched. Her lungs completely forgot how to work and she was only reminded to breathe when she felt Brittany's moist breath by her ear.

"How about now?" Brittany rasped out. "Does it feel silly now?"

"N-no." Santana stuttered. It didn't feel silly at all anymore. All she wanted was for Brittany to continue what she was doing. Please.

"Good." Brittany whispered and you could hear the arousal as the word swooped by Santana's ear. The sensation of it lingered on her skin until Brittany spoke again.

"I'm your handyman and I'm here to _fuck you_, like you've never been fucked before." Brittany said; her voice firmer and with something almost threatening in it. A hungry moan escaped Santana and she pulled Brittany's face away from her ear so she could attack the blonde's lips viciously.

The kisses were wet and the noises echoed in their ears. With a swift lift Brittany had Santana around her waist and started walking further into the apartment.

"Bedroom?" Santana murmured hoarsely and then captured Brittany's lips with hers again for more vigorous kissing. Santana suddenly felt herself slammed against the bookcase in the living room.

"Too far." Brittany grunted and rent Santana's tiny panties down with one hand while keeping her from falling off the shelf with the other. She proceeded to push Santana's legs open wider and draw her fingers up and down Santana's slit, desperate to coat them in the seeping wetness.

"_Hhmmfff." _Santana moaned when Brittany pushed inside of her and she dug her nails into milky skin. Santana was still wearing her T-shirt so Brittany fumbled her free hand in under it and roughly tended to a plump breast.

"Fuck, you're hot." Brittany murmured and she had that accent again. It almost didn't sound like her.

Santana wanted to touch Brittany back so her hand travelled down the thick jeans over Brittany's stomach to cup her sex. She felt a bulge she wasn't prepared for and tilted her head with a wondering frown. Brittany confirmed her suspicion with a smirk.

Santana felt a hard beat go through her core and she hurried her hands up and fumbled with the buckles of Brittany's overalls. She was so excited that her fingers wouldn't cooperate and the more eager she got, the harder it was to open it. Brittany momentarily pulled away from Santana's sex to assist with slippery fingers.

They finally fell down, uncovering Brittany's upper body completely, but caught in crotch height on the silicone member Brittany was currently equipped with. Santana yanked them down and the fake penis rose a little as it was no longer weighed down by the heavy fabric.

Santana bit her bottom lip and pushed Brittany backwards, hopping off the shelf herself, and continued guiding a stumbling blonde to the couch and forcing her to sit. Santana got down on her knees and pressed her body against the sofa between Brittany's legs, which were hanging off the edge of the seat.

She scooted Brittany lower by pulling in the folds of her knees, so most of the blonde's back rest on the soft seat cushions. Brittany watched as Santana's hands slide down her sides until they were planted safely on her hips and then the Latina's tongue came out to slowly moisten her hungry lips.

She teased with her lips over the tip and then her tongue darted out again, running flat up the underside of the cock before taking a mouthful of it. Brittany saw everything. Every last detail. How Santana's lips hugged the girth of the shaft. How she left a thin layer of saliva, making the silicone glimmer when she retracted her head. How she dipped again, taking it in deeper this time. All the while Santana's intense eyes watched Brittany watching.

"_Fuck, Santana." _Brittany groaned but felt fingernails digging into her, encouraging her to stay in character. Brittany ran a hand through the dark, raven hair and placed it on the back of Santana's head. She closed her fist and applied a little pressure.

"Take it." She mumbled and rolled her hips gently, careful to not be too rough. Santana's head started bobbing faster and Brittany felt the motion translate to her hand and run all through her arm. Even though she couldn't actually feel what Santana's lips and mouth were doing; wearing this was one of her favorite things because she got to watch Santana blow her.

Brittany's abs quivered as Santana's hand brushed over the harness and slid between Brittany's legs. She felt a finger inside her. It was gentle at first, toying over her g-spot in come-hither motions. Brittany's legs clenched and her hips rolled again. The fingers went deeper, swirled around, and felt every last bit of the slick inside.

"_Jesus, fuck."_ Brittany cursed and finally had to break her gaze away from Santana and throw her head back, covering her mouth with her free arm and biting down on it. Santana released the dildo with a wet pop and Brittany's eyes fluttered back to the Latina and saw her standing up.

Brittany sat up straight again and reached for Santana, drawing her closer by her thighs and then filled her fists with the white fabric of the T-shirt, ripped it open and tugged it down Santana's arms. Her hands moved to each cup a butt cheek as she pressed her face against Santana's toned stomach; kissing, smelling, licking, sucking at everything she could come over.

Santana moaned audibly and the baseball cap came off as she reached to run her fingers through blonde locks of hair and bring Brittany even closer. Brittany leaned back for a second to draw a breath and it was all Santana needed to feel the need for control fill her up.

She pushed Brittany against the backrest and slapped her hands away. Hugging Brittany's hips between her knees; Santana lowered herself slowly down on the blonde. Santana stopped and ground the air slowly, just to have the tip of the cock slide along her soaking slit once, twice, three times, before letting the member disappear inside her.

She didn't take it all the first time sinking into Brittany's lap. She took a moment to get used to the feeling of something so large inside her before letting it slide in deeper and deeper until it was completely lost within.

"_Shit." _Brittany breathed. Her hands completely ignored how they had been forced away before and she let them wander to Santana's skin again. One grabbed on to Santana's ass to feel the delicate movement of Santana's bumping and grinding in her lap.

The other settled right below Santana's neck to force her closer as the blonde leaned to kiss Santana's collarbone and the birthmark on her right shoulder. Even while being caught up in kissing Brittany couldn't help but glance down between their centers. It was so mesmerizingly sexy to watch the strap on slide in and out, in and out, with ease.

Brittany felt herself bursting with sexual energy. She needed to do something. So grabbed a hold of Santana and stood up off the couch. She threw the Latina back down on it and the blonde's eyes caught sight of her glistening sex, widely exposed, as one leg was hanging off the couch's backrest and the other rested on the floor.

When she went to lie down on top of Santana again she scooped up one of the Latina's legs and threw it over her shoulder, sending a glance at Santana's eyes to make sure it was okay and didn't hurt from stretching too much. Brittany shifted her pelvis and pressed the tip inside, then she stopped. Santana's eyes were halfway to rolling in the back of her head but returned to look at Brittany and beg for more.

"Nuh-no teasing." She said with a small shake of her head and pressed Brittany down by her butt cheeks. Brittany did as told and Santana moaned loudly at being filled up again.

The rhythm was slow at first. But hard. With her hands on Brittany's butt cheeks; Santana could feel them flex with each thrust. Santana moaned. Again. Again. And again. Brittany was so fucking good at this.

She knew exactly what shapes to draw, how hard, how fast and she knew exactly when Santana was about to pop, so she changed it up every now and to make it last longer.

It was getting sweaty; especially between their stomachs where silky cream skin kissed smooth toffee. The smell of sex lay all around them; Santana mixing it with moans and unsteady breathing; Brittany filling every silent second with little noises from the strain of working her pelvis faster and faster.

Santana felt everything. Brittany's soft breasts molding to hers, Brittany's long fingers brushing over her skin, the teasing sensation of blonde hair tinkling her face.

"I'm…- Shit, B, I'm gonna c-"

Brittany wished she could have felt Santana's already tight walls closing in but the sounds escaping Santana and the way she quivered was more than enough for Brittany to know she had done something right. It was like cool epilepsy under her.

When Santana had calmed Brittany broke into that goofy smile she always wore after giving Santana an orgasm. That proud, adorable smile. Santana couldn't see it but she could it feel it. The whole room dwelled in it and she giggled dreamily at the fact that even though Brittany hardly ever, _as in never,_ failed to bring her to the moon and back; the blonde was still equally ecstatic each time it happened. Like winning a gold medal.

With the strap on still very much inside Santana; Brittany placed lazy kisses all over Santana's shoulder and neck. She was still breathing heavily and the hot air first warmed and then chilled Santana's damp skin.

Santana lay completely limp under her, the only movement being her chest filling and pressing up against Brittany's in a deep rhythm. Brittany smiled against the caramel smoothness. A smile that soon froze, and then faded as Santana stiffened due to an unexpected bleep of a phone. It persisted on loudly.

"Don't answer it." Brittany groaned, recognizing the ringtone as Santana's and not her own. Brittany could feel Santana's whole body contemplate her choice and then sigh.

"It's right there… I'll just…" Santana mumbled and her voice faded as she extended her arm to reach the coffee table and grab the phone. She fumbled to pick it up and then held it out so she could see the screen.

"It's Beth." She said and tried to scoot up to sit more upright but found herself completely locked under Brittany's body.

"Don't answer it." Brittany said again, this time sounding firmer in her demand.

"Hey, Beth. What's up?" Santana spoke after lifting the phone to her ear. She once again tried to squiggle out from underneath her wife but Brittany still wouldn't budge.

"_What are you doing?" _Santana mouthed to Brittany while trying to listen to what the other blonde was saying on the other line, and she nodded at the words like Beth would call her out for not listing if she didn't.

"You asked for it." Brittany answered and started moving her hips again. Just a little at first but then with larger thrusts and more finesse. A hand flew to Brittany's shoulder in an attempt to urge her to stop but found it impossible to actually push the blonde away.

"I…. uh…. what?" Santana spoke into the phone, having already forgotten everything she just tried to listen to. Brittany heard a faint voice crackle through the speaker once more and dove to Santana's chest; kissing the flesh open mouthed and smacking loudly to drown it out. She grazed her teeth over a hard nipple and then swirled her tongue around it, sucked it into her mouth and released it with a wet pop.

"_Ohh God…" _Santana moaned quietly, turning her head away from the phone

"Beth, let me…" All of Santana's words bunched up in her throat as Brittany pushed hers pelvis down on Santana hard, burying the silicone member deep inside, and Santana clenched everything to suppress another moan.

"… let me call you back." She hurried out in one breath, afraid to risk more sounds to bubble over. There was a pause while Santana waited for Beth to say something.

"Yeahlaterokaybye." She said and pressed her thumb randomly against the screen without looking, hoping she hit the right spot to hang up, and then threw the phone away so it landed on the soft carpet.

Brittany was still occupied kissing Santana's breasts but the Latina filled her fist with Brittany's blonde hair and brought her up to be face to face.

"Do you think that's funny?" Santana questioned menacingly with eyebrows raised.

_No. No, I don't think it's funny that you can't ignore a call from **her **even while we're having sex. It's not funny at all, Santana. _

Instead of saying that, or anything else, Brittany just dove in for a kiss. It turned frantic fast, lips swelling from the wild kisses. Brittany pulled away for a breath but when she saw the intense redness of Santana's lips; she plunged back to lose herself against them again.

She pinned Santana's hands over her head with interlocked fingers and held on for dear life. Her figure eight shaped thrusts sped up and she was getting sweaty again. It was like an angry-sex one-way street and Brittany was fighting tears more than anything else.

Santana arched her back and bucked her hips without any real control over her motions. Her head tilted back and broke the kiss. She bit her lip to silence herself.

"Don't." Brittany ordered. "I wanna hear you."

A suffocated moan immediately came back to life and filled the room. Brittany's huffs and puffs near Santana's ear only aroused her further and she shut her eyes hard. She felt like the world was spinning.

Her orgasm was building up fast and slowly at the same time. Like she was on the very verge of tumbling over but stayed there, in the land of anticipation, and she didn't want it to end. It felt so fucking good.

"Britt, how are you doing that?" She asked out of breath and between desperate groans. Again, Brittany didn't answer but just kissed a new patch of skin that shimmered with need to be tended to.

"B…" Santana moaned in Brittany's ear. Brittany used to love that nickname. But B could be anyone. B could be… Beth.

"Say my whole name." Brittany mumbled, licking up Santana's neck to her ear and wetly kissed her earlobe.

"Brittany…" Santana gasped, feeling her hands twitch with want to wrap her arms around Brittany and press their bodies flush together.

"Say it again." Brittany demanded, a hint of desperation lingering in her voice. She pinned Santana's hands harder and lost all awareness of how rough she was being. Santana's legs snaked around the blonde's body; locking her feet at the small of Brittany's back. It only spurred Brittany on further and the way she was pounding in and out of Santana made her pulse shoot through the roof. Her triceps were shaking and her calves were cramping.

"I said; say it again." Brittany demanded in a grunt. She needed it. She needed to hear it so bad.

"Brittany." It was a scream, a moan and a plea all rolled into one. The peak was growing. It was like a giant in her lower abdomen and it wanted out. Now.

"Brittany!" Santana called out while feeling herself explode and dragged out the name for as long as her orgasm lasted. Brittany finally let her exhausted body relax, resting her weight completely on Santana.

She bent her head to take in a lungful of Santana's scent right in the crook of her neck and felt her forehead slippery with sweat against Santana's skin. She opened her mouth to ask Santana to say her name one final time but Santana spoke first. Even through desperately trying to catch her breath and finding coherent thoughts impossible to form; those words were clear.

"I love you, Brittany."


	42. Author's Note 2

**CHAPTER 42**

"**Party for one" **

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><p><strong><em>July 23rd<em>**

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><p>"Do you really think she'd cheat on you?" Quinn asked sceptically and took a sip from her coffee. It was still hot so she burned her tongue and winced.<p>

"No! Yes? I don't know…" Brittany sighed and took a moment with closed eyes to compose herself. Santana wouldn't cheat. It wouldn't be like Santana at all. But then again she didn't really feel like Santana around Beth. Her voice was different, her face was different, her laugh was different. Brittany's pout grew and her posture slouched as she rested her chin in her hands, elbows trying to drill through the table.

"She's just so…when she's around Beth she gets so… damn it!" Brittany slammed the table with one hand and her loud voice attracted curious eyes from some of the other people at the café. She gave them all apologetic looks before looking back at Quinn with defeat in her eyes.

"Fear not, Brittany. Since the moment you called us with this I have been working on a brilliant plan in which I lure Santana into a trap and use my excellent skill of twisting words until she slips up and confesses. Everything she says will of course be recorded with top secret surveillance equipment I plan on taping to my underboob." Rachel explained eagerly with a few looks over her shoulder like someone might be listening. There was a pause in silence as Quinn and Brittany just looked at the brunette for a while. Quinn cleared her throat.

"While that is a brilliant plan, Rachel…" Quinn said adoringly and dropped her hand to Rachel's lap before turning her attention to Brittany again. "… maybe you should just talk to her?" It was more of a question than a suggestion.

"I tried. She's either way too smart or way too dumb to pick up on my not so subtle hints." Brittany answered. She had really tried. She felt like she was constantly touching the subject but Santana appeared just as clueless every time.

"So don't hint. Just talk to her." Quinn tilted her head knowingly.

"I can't." Brittany argued.

"Brittany, I can understand your reluctance towards this, but I have to say that while some things do work better with subtlety, others need to be addressed clearer. For example, the other day Quinn asked me about my relationship with her mother. Even though I thought it might have been more beneficiary for me to pretend like everything was peachy keen I decided to speak up and tell her that I don't really like the way Mrs. Fabray looks at me. Turns out; Quinn liked my honesty and later that night in bed-"

"Honey." Quinn interrupted with a stern, yet amused, tone. Rachel stopped talking and sucked her lips into her mouth. She glanced at Quinn who looked back and something told Brittany that there would be reprise of their night soon. She didn't want to mess with their moment so she waited patiently; taking the lid off her coffee mug and stirring different shapes into the milky cappuccino.

"Why can't you talk to her, B?" Quinn suddenly asked and it startled Brittany because she hadn't noticed the two turning their attention back to her.

"I'm scared." Brittany mumbled quietly with a shrug that tried to appear casual.

"Brittany…" Quinn spoke sympathetically and lifted her eyebrows to widen her eyes, thinking it would somehow make it easier for Brittany to meet her gaze.

"For what it's worth, and please take into consideration that Santana and I aren't always the best of friends because even so, I don't think she'd ever do anything like that to you. She loves you too much." Rachel jumped in again. Since Quinn; Rachel had become a lot better at saying the right things and being comforting. Brittany still marvelled at how she could talk so fast without having to stop to think about what words to use.

"She does love you very much." Quinn agreed and the friends' faces lit up as they waited for Brittany to feel better from the statement.

"I know she loves me I just… feel like I'm losing her." Brittany sighed again. She could hear herself moping and being boring but she was really losing faith here.

"I don't believe that." Quinn stated firmly.

"You don' get it. We fight all the time. Yesterday I yelled at her for just putting the TV on mute instead of turning it off when she wasn't watching, and later when I was doing the dishes she started screaming at me for letting the pots air dry on the counter instead of wiping them with a towel and putting them back in the cupboard right away." It was Brittany's turn to talk fast and she stared intensely into the cup. The color of the liquid reminded her of Santana's skin and it made her feel even worse.

Quinn tried no to, but she giggled softly at how silly all that sounded.

"It's not funny." Brittany murmured. "I know I'm pushing her away by being angry all the time but I can't help myself. We haven't even talked since last night. She doesn't even know I have the interview today." Brittany continued and threw a glance at the big clock in the wall.

"Brittany! Talk to her." It was a demand this time, loud and decisive, but Quinn's face still looked warm and loving.

"I hate to be the sappy girlfriend, but I have to agree with Quinn." Rachel said quietly and they both tilted their heads; Quinn to the right, Rachel to the left, so they almost bumped together. They were so freaking cute.

"You're right." Brittany said quickly. "Fine. I'll talk to her tonight when she comes home from work." She nodded her head while saying it, like she was making a mental note to not let herself chicken out with each bob of her head.

"Attagirl." Quinn chirped "And don't be vague." She added with an index finger pointing at Brittany in warning.

"And call us after." Rachel threw in shamelessly.

"Rachel!" Quinn exclaimed in reaction and squeezed her girlfriend's leg tighter.

"What? I just happen to appreciate the every day drama of our friends' lives and you can't blame me for wanting to know how all this plays out." Rachel defended formally and straightened her posture proudly. Quinn giggled again and smiled at Rachel with sparkling eyes. Rachel returned the look with a playful one and you could slowly see Quinn's smile cracking open more, exposing more of her teeth in happiness.

"Do you guys have to be perfect right now?" Brittany said sullenly.

"Sorry." Rachel chuckled, not breaking her gaze away from her girlfriend right away.

"Nah, it's okay. I gotta go anyways." Brittany forced herself to perk up and reminded herself to look at her wristwatch this time. She never really wore wristwatches but she thought it would look nice at the interview. With her hair up and the suit on she figured it would fit right in and make her look important and smart. She stood up from the table and hung her purse over her shoulder, her coat over her left arm and then grabbed the half-empty cup of coffee to go. Deep breath in, deep breath out.

"Good luck!" Rachel chirped.

"You're gonna do great, babe." Quinn called proudly after her as Brittany traced her steps to the exit.

* * *

><p>"Hi, Ms. Pierce? Welcome, I'm Cooper Anderson." A dark haired male greeted with extended hand ready. He wore a snug, black suit. His smile was charming and his eyes were kind. His hair was thick and looked like it took some time to get just right. His jaw line was gorgeous and his chin a little stubbly. He was handsome. There was just one problem. He called her Ms.<p>

It was too much of a touchy subject at the moment to just ignore. Brittany plastered on her most charming smile and stood up from the chair she had been waiting in. Her hands smoothened out the back of her skirt quickly before she reached her right hand out to shake his.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Brittany Pierce, and actually it's Mrs." She said politely, smiling and looking at his eyes. They were almost as blue as her own.

"Oh, my mistake. Lucky guy." He chuckled softly and shook his head at his stupidity. Brittany giggled. She took a second. Should she say something? She felt silly correcting him twice but if she wasn't honest from the start she would have to keep pretending which was even sillier. What if she got the job?

"Actually… lucky girl." She tried to make it light; sounding half jokingly but still making sure he would take her seriously. His eyes went a little wide for a second and he nervously rubbed his palms against his pants.

"Excellent. I just fucked up twice…" He mumbled

"… and now I just cursed." He added and his hands flew up only to fall back to his sides in defeat. Brittany thought he was kind of adorable and suddenly she wasn't nervous at all anymore. They stared at each other for a moment, both waiting for the other to say something. Brittany was smiling kindly and the longer he looked at it, the more the terrified look on his own face faded.

"Sorry, I'm new at this and apparently, not very good at it. Do you- do you wanna start over?" He asked finally, looking hesitant but hopeful.

"Sure. Hi, I'm Brittany Pierce, but just Brittany is fine." Brittany chirped and extended her hand for him to shake it. She even contemplated on whether she was going to do a little twirl but decided that would be too childish and not at all professional. He looked at her hand for a second a skew smile spread on his face. He took and it and this time his hand was a little clammy from his nerves, but Brittany didn't mind.

"Nice to meet you Brittany. I'm Coop." He greeted with another chuckle.

"Pleasure's all mine, Coop." Brittany said and she even added a wink that made him laugh again. He withdrew his hand and pointed down the hall with it. He made sure to walk exactly next to Brittany, not in front, not behind, as they walked towards his office. He held the door for her and Brittany waited by his desk for him to get behind and sit down first. He motioned for her to get comfortable and she lowered herself down, stroking over the back of her skirt again before letting her weight rest on it.

His office was pretty big and not very personalized. He didn't even have any framed photos on his desk. Doesn't everyone have that? A good 20 minutes went by in comfortable chitchat that didn't even touch on relating to the job. They just didn't run out of things to say. He was very funny and Brittany didn't even have to try to be cute and charming. They had a flow. Eventually Cooper glanced at the clock and looked a little disappointed at having to move things along before clearing his throat and straightening his tie.

"So… why do you want to work at the UN?"

* * *

><p>Santana kicked a rock. She heard the zip from Beth's lighter and pretty soon she smelled a puff of smoke blow in her direction. She moved so she wouldn't stand in the direction the smoke was going. She didn't want it in her clothes or in the food. The night was nice though. It was kinda chilly but not cold… fresh.<p>

Santana drew a deep breath with closed eyes. She could hear the stressed murmur from the kitchen. Tonight was busy and she was a little out of it from last nights fighting. She couldn't believe Brittany just left this morning without saying good bye. Sure, Santana was sleeping but she could have left a note. Something had been up with Brittany lately. Santana couldn't figure out what she kept doing to piss her off. It was a freaking commercial break and she was just going to read a stupid article. Geez.

"You look like a mess." Beth said suddenly and woke Santana from her thoughts.

"Gee, thanks." Santana snorted.

"What's up with you grumpy growl?" Beth joked and crossed her arms over her chest, holding the cigarette away from her skin between her index and middle finger.

"Brittany and I are fighting again." Santana answered honestly but monotonously. She gave a shrug that was supposed to be casual but instead it just gave away more of how bothered she was.

"Should've figured…" Beth rolled her eyes and brought the cigarette to her lips.

"Hey!" Santana protested, a little offended with the reaction.

"Sorry…" Beth apologized and gritted her teeth, worried Santana was actually mad. Santana slapped her arm but then smiled, letting her know it was okay. They fell into silence again.

"Oh, I know! Come out with us tonight!" Beth exclaimed suddenly and flicked the cigarette butt away as she turned to Santana eagerly. Santana opened her mouth and held it like that for a second.

"I dunno…" She said finally with one very slow shake of the head. It sounded fun and like something she needed. Plus, she hadn't hung out with Kurt in a while and she knew he would be there. But there was also that nagging feeling that she should go home, and what she wanted more than anything was for Brittany and her to be okay.

"Santana, you need to loosen up! Look at you, you need to dance!" Beth persisted on and gestured at Santana's body like looking down would make it obvious to Santana that going was the right choice.

"Beth…" Santana said hesitantly and Beth knew better than to push when Santana didn't want to be pushed. She put her hands up in defence and waited with open mouth until Santana's face had somewhat softened.

"All I'm sayin' is; asses like yours aren't made to stay at home on the couch." She joked and started going back into the restaurant. When she heard Santana's soft laughter she stopped and looked over her shoulder.

"Come on. For me? Please?" She tried one last time with puppy eyes, smiling wide enough for her dimples to show. Santana rolled her eyes.

"Fine! I'll go." She said like she had just surrendered an argument "Just for a while, though." She added quickly.

"Awesome!"

* * *

><p>Brittany set the table. She still couldn't cook but she had found this awesome take out place just around the corner that did pretty much anything you wanted them to. She went back the kitchen to grab forks.<p>

"Hey, I thought I told you to stay in the fridge?" She said to the champagne bottle standing on the counter. It still had a couple hours to chill before Santana would be home.

Brittany had decided to talk to Santana tonight. She would; she promised herself she would. She had also promised herself that she wouldn't be angry tonight. Coop had called her earlier with some pretty good news so she wanted to celebrate.

She hadn't gotten _**the**_ job because there were so many others with more experience and more fancy degrees, but Cooper liked her so much he gave her a different one. She started on Monday! Sure, she was only an assistant for now, but Coop said she could easily work herself up so that's what she planned on doing. The important title or the big money wasn't the important part right now. She was so excited to just be employed again and she wanted to share that excitement with Santana.

But time was moving pretty slow. It tends to do that when you're waiting for something or someone. She spoke on the phone with Quinn for an hour. She cleaned up a little around the apartment. She went and got the take out. She hadn't meant to eat from it but she was pretty hungry and she knew Santana was never hungry when she came home from work anyways, so she had just a little bite.

When it was closing in on midnight she could feel the butterflies in her stomach work up a storm. It was usually around that time Santana came home. Sometimes she was early, sometimes she was a little later but almost always midnight-ish. She opened the champagne and put it in an ice bucket, bringing that and two flutes with her to the living room. Brittany sat on the couch and eagerly expected the door to bust open any second.

Thirty minutes, and after skimming two Cosmo magazines later, she wasn't so eager anymore. She texted Santana but she didn't get a response. She tried to keep her promise and not be mad but it was getting increasingly harder. She poured a glass for herself and drank it.

"Congratulations, Brittany." She muttered and filled the glass again.

...

She suddenly woke up. Her face was sore. Her back was sore. Everything was sore. She looked at the time. It was 4am and she had fallen asleep on the couch. She dragged herself up and shuffled to the bathroom. Her make-up was smudged to the point where she had mascara on her lip. She washed it in really cold water even though it was almost painful.

When she got the bedroom and didn't see a familiar mound under the covers; she stopped and looked around suspiciously. She patted the bed just to make sure and then she went to the vestibule. Santana's shoes still weren't there. There were no keys in the bowl and no purse on the chair.

She checked her phone but she still didn't have a text from Santana. She called and only got voicemail. Mission: '_Don't get angry'_ had successfully failed. So she stomped. She stomped through the apartment and tumbled into bed, not even bothering to take her clothes off.

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><p>So this is around the time I start pissing you off, ey? Before you hate Santana though, please note that they didn't actually have plans that night. She had no idea what Brittany was planning when she agreed to a night out with Beth and the other co-workers.<p> 


	43. Chapter 43

Hello **_lovers! _**I'm totally on your side in this btw. I'm aware that how our girls are acting is not exactly ideal. I'm not even gonna start explaining myself but I will say this: What fun would I have if they did everything right, ey? ;)

**CHAPTER 43**

**"Waking Sleeping Beauty"**

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><p><em><strong>July 24th<strong>_

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><p>Santana squinted. Her tiredness mixed with the fact that she still wasn't completely sober made the keyhole look incredibly tiny and the key felt enormously heavy in her hand.<p>

She aimed and missed, aimed and missed, then drew it against the lock back and fourth until she felt it dip slightly as it found the slit it was supposed to go in. She moved her head closer and with her nose only inches away she managed to get it all the way in and turn the lock.

When inside she sat down on the floor, flat on her butt to undo her shoes. She fumbled with the knots. She was glad she hadn't worn heels or that walk back here from the place they went to would have been excruciating.

The untying took a while and bending forward took too much energy so she leaned back to lie on the floor for a while. She kicked her shoes off one at a time and then just rested; back against the wooden floor.

The ceiling looked funny. It was just plain white but it was like it was moving or swirling or something. She needed to not drink so much next time. She couldn't take as much as she used to.

Her eyes were getting heavier but she didn't want to sleep on the floor. She found her phone and tried to light the screen but then remembered for the millionth time that it died last night, so she looked at the clock on the wall.

7am. Where the hell did all the time go? Thank God she didn't have to go in to work today. She always tried to get the Fridays off. For some reason it was her least favorite day to work, but it was always busy so she almost always had to go in. Not today though. Today she just wanted to cuddle with Brittany.

A dopey smile spread across her face when she remembered that Brittany was just in the other room. She rolled over on her tummy and pressed herself up using her arms. She got a little head rush and almost lost her balance for a second but when she regained it she felt more clear headed.

She got excited and wanted to run into the bedroom but the alcohol on her breath was making itself known, so she took a detour to the bathroom. She looked in the mirror and surprisingly didn't look like a hot mess. Her make-up was barely smudged, but maybe that was because she wasn't wearing all that much, and her hair was a little ruffled but not too bad.

She still felt gross though. Dancing is sweaty and she had lost count of how many times she had spilled on herself. She dropped her clothes to the floor and got in the shower. It was too hot at first and the steam made her dizzy so she quickly turned the heat down.

Stepping out of the shower she almost felt sober again. But the memory of the night was getting fuzzier. She remembered not planning on staying long but then something happened… Right, Shelby was flirting with a nerdy, 21 year old guy who was out for the first time, and Santana wanted to see how that was going to go. Then there was dancing and drinking and then Kurt and Sebastian took off, and then… nothing until the walk home. She pulled on some sweats and finally snuck into the bedroom.

"_Hey, sleeping beauty."_ She whispered adoringly to Brittany. Little did she know that the blonde had been lying awake for the last hours, worried sick, and heard every last stumble of Santana's home coming.

Santana crawled in between the sheets, carefully shifting closer and closer until she was big spoon with an arm draped over Brittany. She felt Brittany's fingers hug around her wrist and for a second she felt warm and tingly but then suddenly her arm was thrown back to her and Brittany got out of bed and stormed out of the room.

"Whuh-?" Santana sat up and looked around confused. She flinched back when the door shut with a loud bang. Santana pressed the heels of her palms against her eyes, trying to force a headache away.

She threw the covers aside and got up to chase after Brittany. Passing through the living room she saw the two flutes and the ice bucket on the coffee table, in the dining room she saw the table set for two and when she made it to the kitchen and found Brittany pouring lukewarm champagne into the sink; she was up to her ears in guilt. She didn't know.

"_I'm sorry…"_ She whispered and reached her hand out to touch Brittany. Maybe stroke her back, maybe pull her in for a hug, but she flinched back when Brittany just dropped the bottle into the sink and turned around looking furious.

"Where were you?" The question was short but loud and she didn't let Santana answer right away.

"You don't answer my texts, you don't pick up my calls… do you have any idea how worried I was?" Brittany continued to scream, accidentally slamming a hand into the cupboard in her gesturing. It hurt and she winced, snapping it in the air before letting the other hand caress it softly.

"My phone died." Santana explained quietly. It sounded like a bad excuse but it was true and she couldn't help that the battery didn't last longer.

"Did _all _the phones die, Santana?" Brittany shot back. How hard was it to borrow someone else's phone to let _your freakin' wife_ know that you didn't get raped and murdered by a taco addict who's had one too many back alley liposuctions?

"No. But we were fighting and I- no. That was shitty. And mean. I'm sorry." Santana said and her face showed that she meant it. She took a step closer to Brittany, asking with her eyes if it was okay.

"This isn't how marriage is supposed to be." Brittany spoke quietly. Her voice was sad instead of angry now, but something still flared up inside Santana. She felt like she was being attacked.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know there was a marriage rule book." She said sarcastically and raised her eyebrows in an offended expression.

"That's not what I meant." Brittany defended, sounding hurt and Santana immediately felt guilty again. She was still in the wrong after all.

"I know. I'm sorry. C'mere." Santana cooed apologetically and took the hurt hand away from Brittany and brought it to her lips. She kissed the reddish spot tenderly. Brittany bit the inside of her cheek. She loved and hated Santana's lips on her right now.

"Where the fuck were you anyways?" She asked and tried to hold on to her anger, eyes zeroed in on Santana's plump, puckered lips kissing the back of her hand.

"Beth took me out after work." Santana answered casually. Thinking the fight was over at _"my phone died"_ was a big mistake. Brittany pulled her hand back quickly and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Beth took you out after work?" Brittany repeated in question and raised one eyebrow.

"Yes." Santana answered matter of factly and shrugged because she didn't see the problem.

"_Beth?_ Santana, are you fucking kidding me with this shit?" Brittany screamed, her nostrils flaring with rage.

"What did I do?" Santana asked confused. Brittany rolled her eyes. Santana was acting clueless again and it pissed her the fuck off. Was this really all in Brittany's head? Did Santana really not see what she was doing to Brittany?

"Beth this, Beth that-" Brittany hollered, slamming a cupboard door shut on _this _and knocking a plastic bowl to the floor on _that._ Santana jumped back a little startled.

"Britt, calm down. She's my friend." She said gently.

"Do you wanna have sex with her?" The question was sharp as a knife and it stabbed Santana right in the gut. This was jealousy? Santana felt her calm composure evaporate. What, she couldn't talk to other people without making Brittany go ape shit?

"What the _hell_ is that supposed to mean?" Santana shot back, parting her legs slightly to stand steadier, and with her hands on her hips; she looked a little intimidating.

"It means; _do you want her fingers inside you_?" Brittany spoke loudly and slowly like she was trying to make a deaf, retarded child understand her. Her tone was the most condescending Santana had ever heard and the Latina couldn't believe all this was coming from Brittany.

"Brittany? ! ?"

"It's a simple question! Do you want to fuck her, Santana?" Brittany didn't know how many times she had asked now but the fact that she still hadn't gotten an answer scared her. But being scared was scary and being angry was easy. Her chest was heaving, her words were loud and her eyes were terrifyingly wild.

"Okay, stop!" Santana yelled and put both her hands up.

"Just stop. This is ridiculous. She's straight and I don't know if you got the memo, _Brittany_, but I'm married. To you." It was Santana's turn to be snarky. Brittany's shoulders sunk in defeat. She didn't care how straight Beth was or how married Santana was - that didn't answer anything.

"_Just answer the question_." She whispered, staring at the not so fascinating floor. She clenched her jaw and looked up. Her blue eyes pierced through Santana, determined to prickle holes until the answer could escape. Santana inhaled deeply.

"No. No, I don't want to sleep with her." She answered and raised her eyebrows in an 'are you happy now?' look.

"Really?" Brittany's eyes stung with tears that she refused to let out.

"Then why didn't you look me in the eye just now?" She asked, forcing her tone to be cold and icy.

Santana ran her hands through her hair in frustration. Her shoulders rose to gesture that she didn't have anything more to offer. She didn't want to sleep with Beth. They were just friends. She didn't know how she could make it any clearer.

She also thought it was unfair for Brittany to accuse her of potentially cheating. She deserved more credit than that, didn't she? Brittany was the one who had done the cheating in the past. Brittany was the one who had left her at the altar. Santana had taken a fucking bullet for Brittany, but she was gonna screw the next pretty blonde that came along? That wasn't fair. The more she thought about it, the angrier Santana got.

"What the fuck do you want from me?" She shouted and started storming off into a different room. She needed to cool off before she punched someone in the face. However, seeing Santana's back made Brittany's somewhat stilled anger flare up again.

"Don't walk away from me!" Brittany shrieked and followed the Latina's fast steps. She grabbed Santana's wrist to make her stop.

"I want you to look me in the eye and tell me that I-" Brittany didn't have time to finish her demand before Santana had forcefully ripped her wrist out of Brittany's grasp and unexpectedly swung around. She grabbed Brittany by the shoulders and pushed her backwards.

A little grunt escaped Brittany's lips as her back thudded against the wall. Santana held her there. The only thing she could hear was their loud breathing and her own pulse beating in her ear. She rammed the heel of her palm into the wall right by Brittany's ear and it made the blonde flinch.

Furious fire was burning in both pairs of eyes, challenging each other with more intensity by the second. Santana's eyes flickered to Brittany's lips and then back up, only to see Brittany's orbs fallen to the stiff nipples poking out of her tank top. When their eyes met again they were dark with desire and lust. Santana made sure to stare; to go deep into the flaring eyes; inches away from her own.

"The _only_ person I wanna fuck… is _you_." Santana said huskily. Her grip on Brittany's shoulder softened and her hand slid down the length of the blonde's arm. She let go completely, internally begging Brittany to make a move.

Brittany shot forward. Her hands immediately finding the hem of Santana's top and pulling it over her head. She kept pushing forward, making Santana back into the next room. She hugged the back of Santana's neck and pulled her in for a kiss. Walking and kissing was difficult and the bobbing of their uneven walking rhythm made the kisses sloppy, but they were both too famished to break away.

Their hands hurried over each other's bodies; desperate to feel everything. Brittany had it easy as Santana's whole upper body was already exposed. She hugged the round breasts, pinched hard nipples, clawed her fingernails down Santana's back; only letting each activity last a couple of seconds before indulging in the next.

Santana snaked her hands to Brittany's back and unzipped the pencil skirt that was still hugging her waist and messily holding in a blouse. Right when she had gotten it to fall to the floor, she bumped into a table and knocked something over. She pulled Brittany closer and continued stumbling backwards. Whatever it was, it wasn't a matter of life and death but the throbbing in Santana's core, however, was.

Brittany's hand slid inside Santana's sweatpants and underwear, firmly squeezing a butt cheek as best she could reach. Santana assisted by yanking the pants down and stepping out of them.

When turning the last corner to the hallway Brittany spun them around to save Santana from slamming into the doorframe. It resulted in her tumbling into the bedroom door and making it fly open. She pulled Santana inside and pushed her down on the bed, climbing on top of her and diving in to finally kiss her properly.

"I want you." Santana moaned and slid her fingers in under Brittany's blouse. It was warm in there and she stroked over the naked back lavishly. Brittany's tongue inside Santana's mouth froze. There was something different about Santana's touch. Something was missing. Something she had gotten used to and loved _so much_ wasn't there.

She quickly reached for Santana's hands, violently pulling them out from under the fabric and pinning them to the mattress on the sides of Santana's head.

"If you wanted to play rough…" Santana joked and lifted her head in an attempt to resume needy kissing. Brittany pulled back so their lips wouldn't collide. She gave Santana's hand one more glance and looked down at Santana with a frown.

"San… where are your rings?" She asked sceptically. Santana blinked a few times.

"Huh?"

"Your rings." Brittany repeated and let go of Santana's hands so she could see for herself. Panic grew in Santana's eyes. She tried to think but she had no idea where they were. She took them off at work because she couldn't wear them while cooking and then…

"I… must have forgotten to put them back on after work." Santana said hesitantly and propped herself up on her elbows. Brittany's sat up.

"Great. That's great, Santana." She said bitterly and her hand catapulted out. At first Santana thought she was gonna get hit but it continued over her face and grabbed a pillow. Brittany stood up.

"Britt, where are you going?" Santana asked gently and stood up too, following like a loyal puppy. She couldn't believe she managed to fuck up this much in this short amount of time. Brittany stopped her by extending her arm and kept the Latina on arms length.

"I'm sleeping on the couch." Brittany stated and turned around again. Santana watched her walk away with hurt eyes.

"But… it's like… morning."

* * *

><p>Oh lawd. I can actually smell the way I'm making you hate me. Next chapter will be happier. Pinky promise!<p> 


	44. Chapter 44

So I was a little stupid when revising the story and taking away the April fools note, because chapter 42 was 43 and then when it jumped back down to 42 and 43 became 43 (are you still following me?) so some of you, who had reviewed 42 couldn't review for 43. I apologize for that (but I think I'm the most bummed about it), I clearly didn't think it through. Well, technically I didn't know it was going to happen so I couldn't really have thought it through and- why am I still…? What I meant to say was; thank you to those who PMed me instead to let me know your thoughts and all around just a big fucking shout out to everyone who reads and reviews! :D

As a side note I would like to add that I'm nervous about this chapter. AND give myself a shoutout because I passed my exam (which some of you already know because I like to brag, lol)

There was something else... I know there was something more but I can't think of it now... Oh well, guess I'm done rambling ;)

**CHAPTER 44**

**"I love you, I love you, I love you** **like never before" **

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><p><em><strong>July 24th<strong>_

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><p>Santana's steps were heavy. Her hands were shaking. So much for not going into work today… If she was quick maybe she could be in and out of here before someone noticed and wondered what the fuck she was doing. She took a step back, took a deep breath, pushed the door open and went inside.<p>

She frantically began searching everywhere. She had to find those rings! The look on Brittany when she realized they were gone was heartbreaking. Not to mention how awkwardly naked she felt without them. Yes, she had to take them off for work almost every day but that was different. Now they were _gone_. As in no fucking clue where they were.

She tried again and again to remember where she put them last. The only thing she remembered was coming to work yesterday and taking them off. She knew for sure she had put them in the bowl, on the desk, in her office. That's why she had the freaking bowl there. To put the rings in it so she would never forget or lose them. But then everything was blank.

Did she put them back on after work or did she leave them? Her purse showed no signs of them and she had searched it oh, only fourteen times. Did they slip off from dancing all night? Highly unlikely. God, if she just hadn't gone out, if she just hadn't drunken so fucking much; maybe she would have already found them by now. Maybe she wouldn't have lost them in the first place. Stupid, stupid, fucking idiot, dickwad, Santana!

She went through all of the belongings she had left there. Every last bag, every last purse, every last box. She checked all the pockets of all the pants she could find – regardless if they were hers or not. She checked every crease in every single piece of clothing and she looked through every apron hanging on the hooks.

"Damn it!" She exclaimed, shaking the last apron furiously and thinking that if she shook hard enough maybe they would fall out. She looked on every counter and in every fridge. She went into the big freezer and lifted everything she knew she had touched the night before. She swept the floors and looked under everything. She went into her office again, checking the bowl for the millionth time, just in case they appeared since the last time. She even opened books and folders. Like she was ever going to find them there.

She wanted to cry. It was the most hopeless she had ever felt and she kept seeing Brittany's face and hearing her voice. _Great. That's great, Santana._ Brittany wasn't even speaking to her. She thought Santana taking those rings off meant something. Like she was trying to hide something from someone. Like trying to hide Brittany from Beth.

It wasn't like that. Beth knew about Brittany, obviously. They talked about her all the time. More like, Santana couldn't shut up about her. How could Brittany even begin to think that there was something more going on? Had Santana really given her a reason to be jealous? She didn't think so. It didn't feel like it… Brittany had just been so angry lately that it was easier to give her space. Santana thought she wanted space. Ever since that time Brittany came by Breadstix- wait, Breadstix. Where Santana was laughing with Beth…

Santana thought back, carefully analyzing every moment the exact way she could remember them. Every ridiculous fight they had had these last two weeks had really been about Beth? It made sense. When Brittany got mad because they were out of cocoa; it was really because Santana had just said that Beth's jeans looked great. When Brittany screamed about toast crust one morning; it was really because Santana and Beth were going to the mall that day. Fucking _shit,_ she had answered Beth's call with Brittany between her legs for crying out loud.

And Beth was always flirty and touchy, and while Santana knew that meant nothing; Brittany didn't. Santana had been so blind. How could she have been so blind? Beth was nice, she was fun, and Santana liked being her friend. With Emma having a full time job and a full time family; they didn't see each other very often. Mercedes was still around but Santana was getting too old to fight all the time. She just didn't want to become one of those people who only have one other person in their life. She didn't want to turn Brittany completely off by needing her all the time.

But then again, even worse was to turn her off by making her think she wasn't needed or wanted at all. She was. Santana needed her so fucking bad. Not showing her that felt like the biggest mistake she had ever made. But there was no way she was letting this marriage fall apart already. She couldn't. She wouldn't.

Santana went out to the dining hall and looked under every chair and every table. She looked behind the bar and checked both the men's and the ladies' room, even though she had been to neither last night. Nothing. She couldn't find them anywhere. So she did it again. She went through the whole search routine again, if possible; even more thorough.

When she still couldn't find them she sunk down on the floor in the kitchen and started crying. Maybe if she bought new ones? That looked exactly the same, and then Brittany would never notice the difference and maybe she would forgive her? But that would mean lying, and it didn't feel like lying was going to improve her case at this point.

"Hi…" Spoke a soft voice. Fuck, Santana hadn't even noticed the door or steps or anything. She wiped under her eyes and looked up. Beth peered down at her with a sympathetic pout.

"You okay?" Beth asked softly. Santana snorted.

"Looking like this? Are you kidding? I'm fucking fabulous." Santana joked sarcastically and rolled her eyes. Beth gave her a skew smile and sat down on the floor next to her. She leaned against the wall, rested her forearms on her knees and fidgeted with her fingernails. It felt like high school or something; crying on the floor like a hormonal teenager.

"Wanna talk about it?" Beth wondered carefully. The was no pressure behind the question and they fell into silence.

"I can't find my rings." Santana answered after a while, thinking that that problem would be easier to talk about than the fact that she felt like the world's worst wife about to lose the best thing that ever happened to her. That felt so dramatic.

"Your wedding ring?" Beth wanted to confirm. That was ironic.

"Yes. _And_ my engagement ring." Santana answered, rubbing her ring finger and feeling its cold emptiness.

"You sure?" Beth scrunched her face as she asked the question. Santana frowned at her. Of course she was sure, why else would she sit here on the floor like a wanker?

"It's just that you were so worried about losing them last night. You kept talking about putting them in a safe place." Beth explained. To be honest, she had gotten a little irritated from hearing about those fucking rings like non-stop all night last night.

"I did? Where did I put them?" Santana asked eagerly. There was hope.

"No idea... you kept changing it. Purse, pocket, bra, finger... I even think you put them in your shoe at one point." Beth chuckled. Santana always worried about the little things. Santana wasn't very amused, though. Basically, what Beth was telling her was that there were a million places she could have lost them from.

"Fuck." Santana muttered.

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure they'll turn up." Beth said reassuringly and patted Santana on the knee comfortingly. Santana shook her head.

"I've already looked everywhere." Santana protested bitterly. "I told Britt that I would find them and never, _ever_ forget to put them on again… Now I have to go home and tell her they're gone. She's already not talking to me so she's gonna not talk to me even more now."

Beth scrunched her face for a second as she tried to make sense of what Santana just said.

"She can't do that. It's an honest mistake. She shouldn't be so hard on you… and neither should you." Beth argued gently.

"You don't get it. She thinks I wanna sleep with you." Santana snorted again. How was it that everything felt so huge and painful inside and then when you said it out loud it sounded so ridiculous?

"Oh…" Beth breathed and furrowed her eyebrows. She bit her lip for a while.

"Look, Santana, I'm flattered, and you're a really pretty girl, but-" Beth started explaining and her voice sounded awkward.

"No, you _idiot!_ I don't actually want to sleep with you." Santana interrupted and looked at Beth with a 'what-the-fuck?' expression plastered all over her features.

"Hey! I have feelings, you know." Beth feigned being offended and nudged Santana's side.

"Shut up." Santana joked back and rolled her eyes. "You're smokin' and all, and so are a lot of women out there, but they're not her. No one else will ever be her and if it's not her… if it's not Brittany it doesn't even matter." Santana smiled faintly and sighed. How did she get herself into this mess?

"You're such a sap!" Beth giggled and shook her head. "But, uhm, you should tell _her_ all this."

"I know." Santana said defensively. It just didn't feel like it was that simple. She had messed up bad and she wouldn't even know where to begin explaining herself. Saying that she loved Brittany, that Beth was nothing; it was true and easy but what about the fact that she hadn't even noticed what she had been putting Brittany through? How would she explain that? Beth shot to her feet and extended her hand for Santana to take it. Santana gave it a wondering frown.

"Well, come on then! You need to go home to your wife, y_ou sad, pathetic loser_." Beth playfully whispered the last part and smirked.

"Hey! I have feelings, you know!" Santana imitated Beth's earlier statement jokingly. She let herself be pulled to her feet and surprisingly she was pulled all the way into a hug. It was probably the first time she and Beth had actually hugged.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile at the apartment Brittany was twisting and turning on the couch. How come when she wanted to stay awake and watch a movie this was the most comfortable sofa in the entire world, but when she was practically begging her brain and eyes to just sleep there was absolutely no way to get comfortable?<p>

She looked at the time. It was only five minutes ago Santana had left to get her rings and yet it felt like it had taken hours. Brittany growled and kicked the blankets off. Clearly she wasn't going to sleep. Maybe she should just take a shower? She had slept a couple of hours in her clothes and she felt kind of gross.

She went into the bathroom and what did she find on the floor, if not Santana's carelessly discarded, wet towel and the clothes she must have come home in after her amazingly magical, incredibly fun night out with the number one wife-stealer Beth McBitchface. Santana had said that there was nothing going on. It took her long enough, but when she finally said it; Brittany saw in her eyes that she meant it.

Either that, or she had taken lessons in professional lying and become a pro already. Brittany knew what Santana looked like when she lied. And when she said that she only wanted Brittany she didn't look like that. She didn't have that ever so slight lift of her eyebrows that widened her eyes, she didn't have that hint of a wrinkle in her forehead, her eyes didn't flicker at all, and she didn't put her hands in her pockets like she always did when she was lying.

Was it wrong for Brittany to still be jealous? Every second Santana spent with Beth was a second she didn't spend with Brittany, and that was a second Brittany wanted to claim. She knew she couldn't have all of Santana's seconds. It was just that Santana seemed to be enjoying her seconds with Beth so much. So much that even if there was no kissing, or sex, or cheating; Brittany was still scared Santana liked her Beth-seconds more than her Brittany-seconds.

Of course she didn't help by being angry all the seconds she still got for herself. It was like she had created this vicious circle for herself. The more time Santana spent with Beth; the angrier Brittany got and the angrier she got; the more time Santana spent with Beth. So she was mad at herself too. She could have just talked to Santana in the first place, and she could have been less aggressive.

She bent down and picked up the towel first. She knew it would smell like newly-showered-Santana. It was one of her favorite scents along with dressed-up-Santana, sweaty-Santana and sleepy-Santana. They were all almost the same but with slight variations. Sometimes they overlapped; like newly-showered-Santana and dressed-up-Santana. Sometimes she could follow as they went from one to another; like sweaty-Santana to newly-showered Santana. And sometimes they rubbed off on something; like sleepy-Santana on her pyjama T-shirt. Just like on this towel she was holding; she knew it was rubbed in there.

But she wasn't going to smell it. _Don't_ smell it. You're mad at her. Don't smell it, don't smell it. She caved and took a small whiff. It was so good that she immediately took another. After a second or two she didn't feel mad anymore. She tried to be angry again but it was gone.

"Damn it!" She hissed and hung the towel on a hook to dry. She picked up the shirt and threw it in the hamper and last she picked up the jeans. Santana was one of those people who took off her pants by standing on them and then taking high steps to make them travel down her legs. It was adorable to watch, but the pants always turned inside out.

Brittany reached her arm through the first leg and pulled. When she shifted her hold to do the same to the second leg she heard something fall and clink against the tile floor. She looked around and didn't see anything at first but then something red caught her eye. She squinted but it didn't do much good so she quickly squatted down to pick it up.

It was two rings. Two rings that she knew very well and they were tied together in a neat, little bow of red string. They looked kind of small in the palm of her hand but they felt heavy. Santana must had tied them together and put them in her pocket so she wouldn't lose them. She had kept them with her the whole time. She hadn't forgotten them. She had just forgotten that she hadn't forgotten them.

* * *

><p>Santana dragged her steps. The walk home from Breadstix had never been shorter. The elevator ride up to the apartment had never gone faster. The place had never looked scarier and she never been more nervous about talking to Brittany. At first Santana's heart froze when she thought Brittany was gone, because her shoes weren't in the same place as when she left earlier, but then she heard someone shuffle around inside and drew a breath of relief.<p>

She found Brittany dusting the shelves. It was a nervous tick. Brittany always dusted when she was nervous. She said it was the perfect combination of doing something and not really putting an effort into doing something.

"Hello." Santana greeted tentatively. She wasn't sure how mad Brittany still was. Brittany turned around.

"Hi." She answered softly. Santana's featured relaxed at hearing the gentle tone of her voice.

"How are you?" Santana asked, brave enough to put a little smile on her lips.

"I'm dusting." Brittany said and fidgeted.

"I noticed."

"How are you?" Brittany asked back. Santana tilted her head. She wasn't sure she deserved to be asked that question. She stared up at the ceiling and tried to fight off the tears. Brittany dropped the feather duster to the floor and closed the distance between them. She threw her arms around Santana's neck and buried her nose deep in the raven locks.

Santana pressed her lips together to keep from crying but she failed. Why was Brittany hugging her? She had made so many mistakes. She didn't deserve a hug. Especially not this, warm, clingy, loving hug that just wrapped her up and made her feel safe. But at the same time she was so relieved. It was tempting to leave it here. Leave it with this hug like it was okay again. But she wouldn't. She had made a promise to herself.

"We need to get better at this." Santana mumbled in the embrace when the lump in her throat had shrunk, and just a few silent tears wetted her cheeks.

"What?" Brittany pulled away gently and it revealed a few tears trickling down her face too.

"Talking." Santana clarified and let her thumb wipe away a salty drop from Brittany's cheek. Brittany nodded but her face looked a little unsure.

"I'll go first." Santana offered and guided them to sit down. She didn't know where to start because there was so much floating around in her head that it was almost making her dizzy.

"I-… I'm in love with you." She knew that for sure. She knew she could never get that wrong so that's where she started.

"I don't, and won't ever, want to be with someone else, okay? I will never love another person the way I love you. And I love you, Brittany. I love you so much." It wasn't conviction in Santana's voice. She wasn't trying to convince Brittany. It wasn't assurance either. It was just honesty. Plain, but beautiful, truth.

Brittany's lips weren't smiling but her eyes were. It made them deep but yet somehow sparkly and Santana could see her reflection in there. Tyra Banks would have been so proud. Santana wasn't finished though.

"_But_, I think that… lately, I've not said it enough, and I've been even worse at showing it?" It was a statement but also a question; a last glimmer of hope that it wasn't true. Santana waited until Brittany realized she wanted a response and gave her a nod. A tiny little nod was all Santana needed.

"That's not good. I'm sorry." She whispered, sounding disappointed in herself, shaking her head sadly.

"I never meant to make you feel like I was taking you for granted. I never meant to make you think I wanted something, someone, other than you. I never meant to make you feel… unloved." Santana pursed her lips and wiped under nose. This was all really hard to say, to admit her faults out loud, but she needed to get through it.

"But the worst part is… I didn't even notice that I was doing it, and for that… I'll never forgive myself." Santana voice broke and she started sobbing again. She felt worse doing so because she felt like it wasn't in her right to cry over this since it was her fucking fault in the first place. The harder she tried not to, the harder she cried. Brittany stroked her cheek comfortingly and feeling Brittany on her Santana could calm down. She turned her face slightly into Brittany's palm; feeling the heel of it against her lips. Brittany cleared her throat before speaking and yet the sound of her voice startled Santana a little.

"Lately I've been a bitch to you and it hasn't been fair." Brittany said carefully and her hand slid off Santana's cheek.

"I've been a bitch because I've been angry, and I've been angry because I've had all of these feelings… feeling of jealousy, that I've been afraid of dealing with because I've been afraid of dealing with the consequences. Santana, I can't lose you, I just… can't." She explained, and the finger that had been drawing circles on the cushion seat moved and started drawing on Santana's knee instead. Santana grabbed her hands and held them tight in her own. Brittany offered a faint smile before she continued.

"It's my fault too. I should have talked to you from the start…" Brittany murmured with a hint of guilt in her voice.

"Do you know now that you have _nothing_ to be scared of?" Santana asked seriously. Brittany nodded but Santana wasn't convinced.

"I'm serious. If you're not sure you have to tell me. I'll do anything to prove that." Santana ensured with pained eyes. Brittany pursed her lips and nodded again. Santana waited. She saw something else in Brittany's eyes. There was more and Santana knew it. She didn't want to push so she just waited.

"It's gonna sound stupid and selfish…" Brittany mumbled.

"Tell me." Santana requested gently. She couldn't imagine anything Brittany saying sounding stupid.

"I want to be your number one." Brittany spoke fast and a little unclearly because she was embarrassed about wanting something so silly.

"Well, you're not." Santana answered quickly with a loving smirk. "You're my everything." She cooed and tucked a strand of hair behind the blonde's ear. The light touch gave Brittany goose bumps and relief washed over her.

"I'm sorry." Brittany's voice was fragile and so small.

"I'm sorry too." Santana nodded and hugged Brittany's cheeks with her palms, gently drawing her closer until their lips interlocked. It was softer than the fluffiest of pillows and so warm and gentle that Brittany almost forgot how to breathe. They hadn't kissed like this for a long time. Brittany lifted her hands to feel Santana's cheeks and hold her where she needed her.

If someone had seen it; it would have probably looked awkward the way they were both clinging to each other's faces but they couldn't do without it right now. All the safety wrapped up in the touch of their lips couldn't be described. Brittany's bottom lip drew over Santana's and then she gently hugged Santana's top lip between hers. Santana smiled and brushed her nose against Brittany's. It moved slowly and lasted and lasted, aiming for forever. With her forehead still resting against Brittany's Santana let the kiss break.

"We've been fighting so much lately… I don't wanna fight anymore. I'm just too tired." She said quietly. Brittany tensed up and withdrew her head.

"What are you saying?" She asked tentatively, tilting her head hesitantly and forming a little wrinkle between her brows.

"I'm saying that maybe we should take a break…"

Brittany froze even more. No. No! You can't kiss like that and then break up! Please, Santana don't do this. Please don't leave.

"… Take a week just me and you and get away for a while. Forget the world, and just be with each other." Santana continued slowly and dreamily. Brittany was so relieved she could breathe again but so overwhelmed it hitched in her throat when she tried, and the clash of it made it go down wrong and she coughed.

"Are you okay?" Santana asked worriedly, putting her hands all over Brittany like she expected blood to spill from a little cough. Brittany smacked her arm.

"Aoww, what was that f-?"

"Don't do that! You scared the shit out of me." Brittany scolded with her hands over her heart. Santana looked a little startled and confused as she tried to replay what she had just done wrong.

"Oh no! I didn't mean a break from us, silly!" Santana started giggling and when the shock had passed; Brittany joined in. They laughed and hugged and kissed. They touched and felt and caressed. For the first time in two weeks; it was like they finally recognized each other again.

"Will you come away with me?" Santana asked again, beaming at how wonderfully her plan played out in her head. Brittany smiled hugely and nodded. Then her smile faded and her movement turned into headshakes.

"I have to work." She realized. Santana's eyes narrowed.

"Wait? You got the interview? You got the job? Why didn't you-?" Santana wasn't sure how she managed to miss something like that unless Brittany had really tried to keep it from her, but then her mind registered the ice bucket and flutes and she remembered the champagne. Brittany was going to tell her last night.

"Oooh…"

Brittany laughed at how Santana's face looked when she pouted her lips in a perfectly round 'O'.

"I'm so happy for you!" Santana chirped finally, feeling a little silly it took her so long to say the most important part.

"I'm just an assistant for now." Brittany shrugged but Santana immediately narrowed her eyes again.

"They made you an assistant?" She questioned sceptically.

"You have to start somewhere." Brittany shrugged again. She really wasn't bothered by it. She was excited about helping out on human rights cases, poverty cases, famine, diseases… there was so much to work on that no job could possibly be too big or too small.

"Don't they know how amazing you are? Didn't you tell them? I'll tell them right now. What's the number?" Santana persisted and pulled her phone out of her pocket, but she still hadn't charged it.

"Gimme your phone." Santana demanded and reached her hand out. Brittany laughed.

"No." She protested and shook her head playfully. Santana opened her eyes wider in a face that questioned if that was really Brittany's final answer. Santana tried to squiggle her hand into the pocket of Brittany's sweats but Brittany resisted with all her strength. She wasn't about to let Santana call Cooper, because that would most likely get her fired; not promoted.

They struggled for a while, both trying to keep stern looks on their faces and failing miserably. Brittany's tongue was sticking out just the tiniest little bit as she focused on not letting Santana's wrists squirm out of her grip. A strand of hair fell and teased over her eye. Her bottom lip shot out and she blew puffs of air upwards to try and make it go away. It lifted but fell back in the same place so she blew again and again and tilted her head awkwardly. It required so much concentration that she forgot to struggle back with Santana, but it didn't matter because Santana wasn't trying anymore either. She was too busy being in complete awe of Brittany's adorable quirkiness.

"I missed you." Santana blurted suddenly. Brittany woke from her deep concentration and a little smile pulled at the corner of her mouths. She hugged Santana again, stroking her thumb over those little hairs in the back of Santana's neck.

"Yeah, me too."

Tiredness slowly set in. Brittany had only slept a couple of hours and Santana had been up all night partying so it was really more like exhaustion. Santana leaned back in the couch and Brittany snuggled up with her head in Santana's lap. Santana ran her fingers through the silky hair and traced the features of Brittany's face.

"I have to tell you something… and I don't think you're gonna like it." She said finally. Brittany's blue eyes looked up at her and waited. Santana took a deep breath.

"I can't- … I looked. I _really_ looked. And I can't… I can't find my rings." She said hesitantly and bit her lip, afraid that Brittany would get mad again. Brittany raised herself up slowly.

"I know, I'm a fucking idiot! And I'm so sorry. I'm gonna buy new ones, but I mean, those were the ones you gave me and they were perfect and I loved them so much and I wanted them and I hate that can't remember where I put them because they mean so much. I just… I'm sorry." Santana rambled and closed her eyes like she was expecting a punch in the face. When nothing happened for a couple of seconds she opened one eye just a tiny crack to see what was going on. Brittany was smiling goofily and stood up off the couch. She disappeared for a while and Santana wondered if she should follow or stay but the blonde soon came back and sat down, straddling Santana's lap.

"I got you something." Brittany murmured mysteriously and held out a closed fist. Santana brushed over Brittany's fingers lightly with the tips of her own and watched curiously as the fist slowly opened. There was a simple silver chain resting in the palm of her hand. Brittany picked it up by the clasp and opened it. She leaned her head all the way over Santana's shoulder so she could see the clasp when trying to close it around Santana's neck.

The cold chain warmed up against Santana's skin fast but then she felt Brittany fumble in her pocket and suddenly something else cold hit the back of Santana's neck and slid down along the chain, stopping by her collarbone. She reached for it, a huge smile breaking out as she felt the two hoops between her fingers and the rasp of diamonds against her skin.

"I found your rings." Brittany said coyly. "They were in your pocket." Brittany felt the rings between her fingers too and kept brushing against Santana's lightly until they both got more interested in feeling each other's hands than feeling the metal, so they interlocked fingers. Santana kissed each of Brittany's digits that held on to the back of the Latina's hand.

"You can still wear them on your finger if you want but I figured this way… you would never have to take them off." Brittany explained bashfully with a shy shrug. She was nervous about the suggestion. She had just taken the liberty to go out and buy a necklace without having a clue if Santana actually wanted it. Santana leaned forward and let her lips slide smoothly back and forth on the naked skin over Brittany's heart, making the blonde feel how widely she was smiling. Santana was never taking this necklace off. Not even if her life depended on it.

"I love you, Brittany. I love you like never before."


	45. Chapter 45

**Hello to all** - family, friends, readers and lovers! I need your help with something. This story is coming to an end in **five** chapters _(I know, right?)_ and yes, there will be a sequal _(most definitely probably at least) _but first there will be something else. So in my mind I had this nice little idea that I got really excited about, but now there's this other idea that I might be even more excited about and I don't know which one to write first? They'll both be AU high school, but the first one is easygoing and kinda corny whereas the second is probably gonna be really angsty. I know it's not much to go on, but which would you rather read? PM me or something, kay? :)

This chapter is -_ what I call_ - actually I don't know what I call it, I just really wanted to pretend to be Miranda's mom :) I guess it just has no real substance.

**CHAPTER 45**

"**Weekend getaway"**

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><p><em><strong>July 25th<strong>_

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><p>"<em>Thank you."<em> Santana whispered to the man in the door and handed him a generous tip before closing the door behind him and bringing the cart of goodies to the side of the huge bed in the beautiful hotel room. Since Brittany didn't start work until Monday they had decided to go away for the weekend.

Santana loved waking up in hotel rooms. And she loved room service. She took a spoon full of ice cream in her mouth and stood by the side of the bed watching her wife sleep. Brittany was lying on her stomach, taking up way more than half the space and without any covers. Santana smirked and climbed on the bed again. She ran her nose from one of Brittany's back dimples all the way up to the blonde's ear.

"_Wake up, sleepy head."_ She cooed gently. Brittany hummed something and buried her face deeper into the pillow. Santana giggled at the adorable tiredness and kissed softly down the blonde's spine before rolling off her and lying beside her to let her sleep a little longer. She watched as Brittany tried to carry on in peaceful slumber but the blonde was awake now and she could feel Santana's eyes on her. Brittany rolled over to face Santana, whose eyes sparkled at being presented with sleepy orbs and messy hair tangles.

"Good morning." Brittany mumbled but instead of stretching to wake up, she closed her eyes again and wrapped her body around Santana in an attempt to drag the Latina with her to the magical land of pretty dreams again. Santana chuckled, basking in the warmth that was Brittany's naked skin on hers, and let a little kiss linger on Brittany's nose.

"You smell like ice cream." Brittany murmured and took a deep breath of it.

"That's because we're having ice cream for breakfast." Santana informed alluringly. Brittany opened one eye in suspicion and inspected Santana's face carefully for any signs of it all being a mean trick. Brittany did not kid around with her ice cream breakfasts. She caught sight of the room service cart by the bed. It was decorated with a dozen bowls of different flavour ice creams.

"Oh my God." She breathed excitedly and shot up, leaning over Santana and scooping a big blob of ice cream in her mouth. Santana laughed at how quickly Brittany suddenly woke.

"This ice cream is crispy and delicious." Brittany said with her mouth full and chewed on a piece of chocolate chip cookie swirled in vanilla creaminess.

"Speaking of delicious…" Santana hummed and slid her fingers from as far down on Brittany's calf as she could reach and all the way up to the back of Brittany's thigh. How was she expected to keep her hands to herself when she had that ass draped over her lap? Brittany twitched as it tickled slightly and shifted in the bed so she sat with her back against the headboard. With the spoon in her mouth she pondered on which flavour to choose next. She moved two bowls into the bed and then decided on the chocolate. Just when she was about to reach her lips to taste it; she registered Santana watching her with slightly parted lips and dark eyes. So she stopped.

"You want some?" She asked seductively and Santana eagerly nodded.

"Come and get it." Brittany teased and tilted the spoon so the ice cream fell and slid down between her breasts. It left a cold, wet trail and it felt kind of nice. It slid sideways; following the outline of one of her ribs when she suddenly felt Santana catch it with her tongue and follow the trail all the way back up between her boobies. When she was done; Santana sat up again, like a little puppy excitedly waiting to get to do it again.

"You want more?" Brittany said huskily and licked her lips.

"Uh-huh." Santana nodded calmly, not taking her eyes off Brittany's body as she spoke. Brittany put the spoon down and dipped her finger into a bowl instead. She let Santana suck it clean and then she took it in her own mouth to taste Santana's sweetness with the pecan. Next she dipped her whole hand in, filling it, and bringing it closer to her already naked sex.

"That's gonna be cold, B." Santana stated with a raspy voice, following each millimetre of the hand's movement. Brittany smirked and smeared it on. It was a little cold at first but most of it had already melted in her hand and she was emanating so much heat anyways.

Santana's sympathy for the cold blurred together with her eagerness and she wasted no time, shifting to sit on her knees instead and diving forward. The taste was delicious. If someone ever made an ice cream called 'strawberry cheesecake and Brittany' Santana would probably get fat from eating nothing else. Brittany held her breath as the sweet, sticky ice cream was switched out for Santana's slick, hot tongue.

"Holy shit, B." Santana mumbled. She lapped up everything she could come over, running her tongue flat over outer and inner lips, kissing the mound open mouthed, sucking every last piece of flesh; desperate to make the flavour last forever and taste it all at the same time.

She grabbed under Brittany's butt and lifted it slightly off the bed, creating a better angle and thus gaining better access to Brittany's core. The shift of Brittany's body made one of the bowl tilt and fall over so ice cream seeped onto the sheets. Santana didn't notice and Brittany didn't care. Santana's lavish licks made Brittany squirm and moan but she wanted more.

The blonde's fingers were still covered in melted ice cream, but she couldn't care less as she ran her hand through Santana's hair, making a mess of it, and pressed the Latina closer. This was usually Santana's cue to ram her tongue inside Brittany and viciously have her way in there. But there were few things as sexy as hearing Brittany beg. So she let her tongue dance around a gushing entrance. She teased over it, toyed under it, played around it and the pressure on the back of her head grew firmer and firmer.

"Santana, I-" Was all Brittany had time to say before Santana shut her up by dipping the tip of her tongue inside. With tiny little movements she had Brittany grabbing on to the headboard with a thud, followed by a moan. But then, just as quickly, Santana went back to hovering near, instead of inside again. A grunt caught in Brittany's throat and she looked down, seeing her abs quiver in her unsteady breathing and Santana's dark head of hair between her legs.

"Baby, I need you so bad." Brittany pleaded with her nails clawing into Santana's scalp. Santana peered up.

"_Uh-huh_, tell me about it." She encouraged huskily and wrapped her lips around Brittany's clit, sucking on it hard. Brittany's eyes rolled under hooded lids and she held on harder to the headboard to bring herself back.

"I need your thick, throbbing tongue inside me _now_." Brittany ordered, in a voice firm enough to make Santana moan and before Brittany knew it; Santana's tongue was there, giving it to her just the way she loved it. She knew what it meant. Santana was telling her that Brittany was in control. The thought alone made her lower abdomen pinch.

"I need your hands on me." Brittany's voice was weaker this time, lost in a moan, but Santana obliged no less. She grabbed on firmer to Brittany's butt, keeping her in place still, and then let one hand feel every inch of skin it could reach, ending up squeezing the blonde's breast hard.

"_Okay, fuck… uggghhhhh. Shit."_ Brittany groaned. Coherent thoughts; there were no such things. She let go of the headboard and grabbed the sheet instead, feeling her nails dig into her palm as she closed her fist hard. She was so worked up that it wasn't enough. Her fist shot open again and smacked over the second bowl of ice cream, soiling her fingers completely. She didn't even notice, and her hand was on the move again, wrapping around Santana's and urging her to knead the breast even harder until she winced from the pain. Santana was getting increasingly aroused from the way Brittany was acting under her touch and she wanted it to continue. She worked her tongue more vigorously; swirling and twisting like there was no tomorrow.

"I need… uuh- I need to fuck your mouth." Brittany blurted, arching her back and rolling her hips into Santana, who used her hold on Brittany to make her rock back and forth, all the while Brittany's hips kept hungrily rolling, making Santana's tongue thrusts more intense. The one of Brittany's breasts that wasn't being clamped onto for dear life, bounced in the movements. Too good. It was too good. It was just too… -

"Santana." Brittany warned as her peak was milliseconds away. With a final jab inside; Brittany came tumbling over the edge with a scream. She clenched so hard Santana thought her tongue might break from the pressure, but then it loosened somewhat and before she knew it; liquid hit her and trickled down her face. She delightfully tasted it and smiled.

Since that first time it happened; Santana had gotten better at knowing what to do, and Brittany had gotten better at letting go so much her body allowed it to happen. But even with mind blowing sex it didn't happen every time so to Santana it was a sexy, double rainbow whenever she got to taste that sweetness. She hummed approvingly and lowered Brittany back down on the mattress, realizing just how tired her arm was.

Brittany's eyes were lazily closed, her smile was goofy and chest was still filling deeply with each breath. Santana smiled wider and crawled higher, resting her head on the pillow so close next to Brittany that her lips grazed the blonde's cheek. Brittany let out a dotty chuckle.

"If everyone got to wake up like that there would be no evil." She joked and reached for her spoon again, slipping some sorbet in her mouth. Santana laughed a little.

"I'm not kidding. That was... _so amazing_" Brittany informed dreamily. Santana smiled proudly and puckered her lips every so slightly so they pressed a real kiss against Brittany's cheek, and she felt the blonde's face break into a huge smile.

"Which is your favorite time?" Santana asked playfully after a while.

"Too many choices, San." Brittany sighed contently and giggled. But then her mind started thinking about it and she couldn't really let it go. Narrowing it down was hard and she realized just how much sex they had actually had in the last three years.

"The night we moved in together and our wedding night were really special times." Brittany said after a while. She really liked those nights when they just went on and on and suddenly it was morning and they hadn't even noticed that so much time had passed, because in their own little world time didn't even exist. It was just the two of them.

"What do you think?" Brittany asked back and turned her head to look at Santana who narrowed her eyes in thought and smirked.

"I really liked when I had you in that chair over and over again. And then you… yeah that was great." Santana answered absent minded, lost in the memory.

"Mmmm… you in that latex suit… Do you still have that?" Brittany returned slyly, fingering the scar on Santana's tummy. Santana chuckled but didn't answer. She pressed her lips against the side of Brittany's face again.

"New Year's Eve 2013 was pretty intense… and our first time ever." Santana's mind was playing so many shows at the same time right now. She bit her lip.

"My birthday two years ago." Brittany blurted as she remembered how Santana manhandled her on that table.

"Our anniversary on the roof." Santana returned. She had expected that time to be wild and crazy, and she had the underwear to match, but it ended up being really slow and gentle. She liked it when it wasn't what she expected. Brittany laughed.

"See, I told you there were too many choices." Brittany chirped sleepily and stirred, shifting to wrap her leg and arm over Santana and nuzzling her nose into Santana's chest

"Yeah, you're right." Santana murmured and yawned.

"I'm always right." Brittany mumbled playfully.

"You're a dork, is what you are." Santana cooed amorously and embraced the body clinging to hers. She buried her nose in locks of blonde hair and smelled it. Then there was _this_, just lying still with Brittany in her arms. It was just as amazing.

…

Santana's eyes slowly fluttered open. She must have fallen asleep. She lifted her head and looked down. As she did she felt her hair stick to the pillow and pull at her scalp. Gross. She saw Brittany's eyes closed and the blonde was also on the verge of snoring. Not really snoring because her breathing was too soft, but almost. Santana loved that sound. It was so calm and peaceful. And it was cute.

When lifting her arm from hugging Brittany's waist she felt that sticky too. And her thighs were stuck together from melted, half dried ice cream. It wasn't just all over their bodies; it was on the sheets too. There was probably more ice cream in the bed than in their stomachs. It was kind of icky. Santana touched her hair and it was like ice cream induced dreadlocks.

"Shit." She gritted. She didn't want to wake Brittany but she had no idea how to untangle herself without doing so since they were practically glued together. There was a violent knock on the door that startled Santana and woke Brittany.

"What's happening?" Brittany asked, sounding a little frightened and looked around like she was trying to spot a fire.

"Housekeeping!" A woman yelled and then knock repeated itself. Santana's jaw fell open as she looked down at their naked bodies. Where were the freaking covers? Before she even had time to spot them; the door opened and a short, dark haired lady walked in. Her eyes went wide and she mumbled something in Spanish before quickly spinning around.

Brittany hurried to her feet and covered herself with a pillow she took from an armchair. Santana stood up to and nodded in the direction of the bathroom before wrapping a blanket around herself. She certainly didn't want to be out there after how the maid just found them and they desperately needed to shower anyways.

Brittany went in there first, throwing the pillow back out after hiding her naked skin behind the door. Santana walked around the bed and picked it up. She put it back on the armchair and gave the maid an apologetic look. It quickly turned into a frown as she heard the woman mutter something else in Spanish. It was quiet and she couldn't fully make it out but she was pretty sure it was something about filthy dykes and going to hell.

"¿Quieres que te despidan?" Santana shot back quickly. The lady had not been prepared for Santana understanding her. Her eyes went wide and she looked away in embarrassment.

"Didn't think so." Santana said spitefully and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"What did she say?" Brittany wanted to know after hearing the Spanish murmur and seeing Santana upset. Santana snorted and gave a shrug that tried to look casual.

"She was just jealous because I get to have super hot lesbian sex with you." Santana tried to joke but she couldn't really smile.

"San?" Brittany whined.

"She just… she wasn't very nice." Santana sighed. She always tried to act like these things didn't bother her but it was just to fucking tiring to get judged without people having a clue who she was.

"It's fine. I'll just go down to the front desk and get her fired." Santana added with another shrug. Brittany tilted her head with a pained wrinkle between her brows. Then her face changed into a smirk.

"I know something funnier we can do…" She suggested mysteriously. Santana frowned. Brittany backed herself up against the door and slammed her body against it.

"Oh God, Santana!" She moaned. "Mmmmm."

"_What are you doing?"_ Santana whispered.

"_She's still out there, right?"_ Brittany whispered back. "Uuh, right there!" She continued louder and in a much more sexual tone. She roamed her hands over her own body and moaned Santana's name loudly again and again. Santana watched, amused, for a while but then she joined in.

"You like that, baby?" Santana rasped. She wasn't really doing anything to Brittany but the blonde nodded vigorously.

"Oh God, yes! More!" Brittany screamed. Suddenly they heard the radio switch on out there.

"That feels so good!" Brittany continued. Her voice was whiny from feigned pleasure and even louder to still make herself heard. Santana moved closer.

"You're so hot." She breathed. If it weren't for the fact that the bitch was still out there she would have been really turned on right now.

"Harder!" Brittany exclaimed. She was so lost in the game; she was barely aware of what she was doing. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around Santana, who wasn't prepared, but managed to catch her; if not gracefully then at least safely. As Santana started banging Brittany against the door they could hear the music turn up louder and mere seconds later they heard the lady leave.

Brittany started laughing and let her legs slide down Santana's body. Santana was smiling and Brittany was so happy she had made Santana smile again. She opened the door and peeked out. The room was empty again but the sheets were changed and the bed was made. The radio was still blasting but the lady had at least done her job so that was nice of her. Brittany pulled her head back inside and closed the door.

"Shower?" She questioned casually and switched the water on.

"Oh dear God, please, yes!" Santana begged as she saw her mess of a hairdo in the mirror. She frowned at herself and lifted the clogged together strands of hair like they were made of vomit or something else gross.

"Come on then." Brittany purred. She was already in the shower, letting the warm water hug her skin. Santana smiled and hurried the three steps to get to the shower. Brittany had left the door open to wait for Santana so a little pool of water had formed on the floor. Santana threw a towel on it before joining Brittany under the raining water.

It was one of those huge shower heads so both of them easily fit under the stream of water. Santana closed her eyes and parted her lips to breathe through her mouth. It felt so good to have he water splash against her skin. She took the soap and let it glide over her arms and legs. Usually she showered with liquid soap, but when staying at hotels it was like half the experience to shower with one of those solid ones.

Brittany took it from her and motioned for her to turn around which she did. Brittany lathered from her neck all the way down to her calves. Santana leaned forward and supported herself with her hands against the steamy glass of the shower wall. Brittany put the soap aside and like she hadn't gotten it in there good the first time she let her hands travel over Santana again, massaging slippery skin with slippery fingers. It was warm and nice and relaxing.

The air was getting steamier and Santana's breathing deeper. She moaned when Brittany kneaded her ass cheeks firmly. Brittany stepped closer and her hands travelled higher. With a blob of shampoo in her hand she started rubbing Santana's scalp. It was firm and somehow soft at the same time. Santana quivered and despite the hot water; goose bumps formed on her skin.

Santana moaned again and her hand slid down the foggy glass on its way to Brittany's back in order to press her closer. The lathered shampoo started slithering down her face but her eyes were closed anyways so she didn't mind. Brittany continued soothingly massaging and even kissed Santana's shoulder and the crook of her neck despite getting shampoo taste in her mouth.

Brittany's hands slid down again when she was done lathering and she rested them on Santana's hips. They just stayed there, softly holding on. Santana turned around. She kept her eyes closed until she was sure her eyes wouldn't sting of she opened them. Then she looked at Brittany, who was gently gazing back. Her blonde hair was darker and her skin glowed from being wet. Her lips were slightly parted and drops of water kept dripping off her nose and chin.

"When I first saw you I thought you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen." Santana said lovingly. Brittany wasn't prepared for Santana to speak, let alone say something like that so her natural instinct was to giggle.

"It's true! I was kinda drunk so my brain was saying some pretty dramatic things." Santana joked. "I remember thinking: _I can totally die now because this world couldn't possibly have anything more gorgeous to offer_." She continued and laughed. She had really thought it. She remembered being in the air, lifted by Brittany, and their eyes met for just a second before it got to intense and Santana started struggling in the blonde's arms. And when Brittany got so close that Santana could feel her hot breath on her lips for the first time, she didn't even know how to breathe. Since that moment, that very moment, she had been totally whipped.

"What are you thinking now?" Brittany asked coyly. Santana looked into her blue orbs like Brittany's inside would show through there.

"That you get more beautiful every day." Santana answered matter of factly. She smiled crookedly.

"And that I sure as hell ain't croakin' any time soon, because I want a long, beautiful life – with you."

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><p>PS. I reserve the right to make Spanish mistakes because despite the <em>veeeeery<em> sexy nature of that language; I have yet to take the time to learn it… So google translate did the work for me :)


	46. Chapter 46

Okidoki, here we are. I don't have all that much to say today. I gotta go actually because it's my dad's birthday and we're gonna celebrate! :) But I wanted to say about the upcoming stories... opinions are widespread and I just want to please everyone so I decided to do both and try to do them at the same time but like... the easygoing one getting updates every three days and the angsty one once a week? It seems like a fair enough plan in my head right now, but if I die from stress later then I'll just put one on hold. Okay? Okay! :D

**PS -** note the time jump for this chapter.

**CHAPTER 46**

**"Something tiny on my mind"**

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><p><em><strong>March 3rd, 2016<strong>_

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><p>Brittany walked down the candy aisle. She had been craving a snickers bar since early this morning and she was sure they had one at home but when she went to grab it this morning - it was gone. Santana must have eaten it. Or maybe she ate it and forgot. Either way, they didn't have it, and so it was all Brittany could think about. She had wanted to buy one before going to work, but then things got stressful and she didn't have time. So as soon as her lunch break started she rushed to the nearest supermarket and here she was now. While she was, she decided to pick up some other stuff too.<p>

They had a big fridge and freezer in the staff room so she could just leave it there and then bring it home with her. She grabbed a feta cheese salad for some proper lunch and apples because she knew Santana liked them. Plus, Brittany really liked the way Santana ate them. She also grabbed some chili, Santana's favorite popsicles and of course the snickers bar. She looked at the time and headed for the check out. She almost walked all over a little boy sitting on the floor playing with a toy car. She stopped right before her heel dug into his thigh.

"_Shit."_ She gritted between her teeth but felt kind of bad for cursing. He couldn't have been older than two and shouldn't hear those kinds of words. She looked around for a parent or a sibling, but saw none so she squatted down in front of him.

"Hi, there."She greeted happily. The little boy was too shy to answer but he smiled a little smile before hiding his eyes behind his chubby fingers.

"What's your name?" She asked gently and smiled. He dropped his hands and looked at her with wide eyes for a moment. He reached out to touch her face but his arm was too short to reach and when she giggled she startled him a little and he drew his hand back, folding it awkwardly against his chest.

"I'm Brittany." She offered. "Where's your mommy?" She looked around again but saw no one coming to claim the little boy. He was thinking intensely. He looked concentrated. His mouth hung slightly open and a drop of saliva threatened to travel from the corner of his mouth down his chin. His skin was slightly darker. Not as dark as Santana's but definitely darker than Brittany's. His eyes, on the other hand, were the darkest she had ever seen. They looked almost completely black and so big on his small face. His hair was pitch black and it looked so silky she had to clench onto her skirt to not play with it between her fingers. He kicked his leg up which made Brittany flinch back. Then she saw that his shoe lace was undone so she stilled his foot and tied it.

"Thank you." He said and his voice almost startled her, because she wasn't prepared for him to talk. It took a moment and then he chuckled from deep in his throat and wrestled with himself to stand up. He was a little wobbly at first but then he gained his balance. Brittany picked up his toy car and handed it to him.

"Thank you." The boy said again. He looked around curiously, mostly up, and then he darted away. Brittany wanted to follow him and make sure he was okay but she didn't want to be the weird lady who stalks little children in the supermarket. Instead she stood in the longest of the three lines to the register and kept looking out at the store in hopes of catching another glimpse of the little boy before it was her turn.

Just when the cashier started beeping her items she saw him again. More specifically she saw his head bobbing over a shelf. Then she saw a tall man appear and the little boy riding on his shoulders, holding on to the man's forehead for dear life. The boy's eyes sparkled and he looked so happy. The man was different from the boy. He was blonde and large and Viking-like. Brittany couldn't know if the boy would grow up to look like that too of course, but she thought there was no way that little boy's dark eyes and black hair came from those green eyes and wavy blonde locks.

Brittany was startled when the cashier asked her to pay and she realized she had been staring. She handed over some cash and exited. Before going out the door she glanced over her shoulder and saw the little boy waving at her.

The walk back to the office was through different eyes. Had there always been so many babies out? Everywhere she looked she saw mother's pushing strollers, father's walking with baby carriers and nannies trying to bribe crying children with pacifiers. They were all so cute too. Brittany imagined feeling their smooth baby hair, pinching their fat baby cheeks, holding their soft baby hands and hugging their cute baby bodies. And was it just Brittany or were the babies looking at her differently too? Their eyes were so nice and inviting; like they just wanted to be held by her.

A baby in a stroller came closer and closer as she walked down the street. She looked at it and it smiled back at her. She wondered if it was a boy or girl. It had really long eye lashes and very full lips so at first she thought it was a girl. But then, just because she thought that; she decided that it was a boy. His name was Charles, but while he was so little; everyone called him Charlie.

He liked to climb trees and dance and his favorite color was orange. Brittany made up more stuff in her head about him but then she caught a look of his mother giving her a dirty look and she realized she had to stop staring at kids like she wanted to eat them. She also decided that when she became a mother she wouldn't be bitchy to people on the street for thinking that her baby was cute.

She definitely wanted to be a cool mother, but then she felt bad about making Santana the strict parent in her head so she changed her mind and decided they would both be cool parents and just raise the kids so great that they never needed to be strict. Then she giggled at how naïve that felt.

The most important thing though, was to always be there. No matter what; she always wanted to be there. Making mistakes would be okay as long as she was there to learn from them and to fix them . Also, letting her kids be themselves was important. Not just letting them – encouraging them to be themselves. Even if she wanted at least one of them to really like dancing, and for Santana she wanted one of them to really like cooking, and she wanted all of them to like old movies so the whole family could snuggle up in bed on Sundays and watch the classics, she would never force it on them. It's hard to be a parent and not try to shape your children but she would try. When she became a mother she would really try. Wait. When she became a mother? What was happening?

"I must be getting my period." She mumbled and a guy stopped on the street right in front of her. He looked at her with surprise and suspicion and that's when she realized she had just said that out loud.

"Sorry." She said quickly and hurried past him. She wasn't far from the office now so picked up the pace a little. Her lunch break was almost over and she hadn't even eaten her snickers bar yet. When she had made it back to her station she almost collided with Cooper.

"Brittany!"

"Coop. Sorry." She said and shook her head. She needed to get a grip. She was just going to walk past him and go back to work but her stopped her.

"Perfect! Just who I was looking for." He said and completely changed his direction to walk after her. Wasn't he just heading out? He put his hand on her back and guided her through the hall.

"My sister just flew in and I want to take her out for lunch." Cooper explained. "I was thinking that maybe… I know it's not what you were hired to do, and if you don't want to; feel free to say no... but I was wondering if you wouldn't mind watching her daughter for just a couple of hours?" He continued and it made Brittany come to a complete halt.

"Are you kidding?" She asked and looked at him. She almost felt the urge to knock on his forehead. How did he know?

"It's just that I want to take her some place nice and they usually frown upon bringing toddlers." He excused and his eyes were practically begging her to accept. "Please."

"Yeah, sure. No, of course! I'd… yes." She stuttered out. She shook her head again. She must have looked like a complete idiot.

* * *

><p>Santana took a sip of her tea and tried not to break her gaze away from the book she was reading, but the cup was getting emptier and she had to tilt her head further and further back. She read a while longer and then got up to refill her cup.<p>

Her bare feet patted against the kitchen floor. She pulled her tank top down. It kept sliding up to the small of her back when she moved. She put more water on and opened the cupboard. She really wanted a sweet berry flavour but it was getting later and she figured she should probably choose something without caffeine.

She returned to the kitchen island with a refreshed cup and sat down on the high stool. She turned the book over and started reading again. She blinked a few times. She must have been tired already because it was getting harder to focus and her eyes felt strained. It was happening more and more lately. What if she needed glasses? Her mother had started wearing glasses at 27... so in all fairness she should get at least one more year. She pushed it away and focused harder.

Brittany walked through the door a couple of minutes later and came into the kitchen immediately. Her coat hung over her forearm, and so did her dry cleaning. She hung it over a chair instead and did the same with her blazer after taking it off. Santana loved watching Brittany come home from work. She had a routine that was almost exactly the same every day. And plus, she looked so sexy in her pencil skirts and tucked in blouses. She also left her heels on for the first hour or so after coming home. Santana didn't really know why but she liked it.

When Brittany was done putting down all the things she was carrying; she took her phone out of her purse and brought her purse back to the vestibule. She walked up to behind Santana and placed a long kiss in the crook of her neck. Santana hummed approvingly and tilted her head away to give Brittany more access to her skin. Brittany smiled and gave her one more before going to the fridge and taking out a bottle of water.

"You hungry, baby?" Santana wanted to know. She could make Brittany something if she wanted it. Or she could reheat something; they had some leftovers. Brittany took a gulp of her water.

"Maybe in a little while." She answered after feeling around. She had just eaten the snickers bar. Turned out Ella, Cooper's sister's daughter, was allergic to peanuts so Brittany had been forced to wait to eat it. She didn't mind though. After Ella had woken up Brittany had forgotten all about it. She had the best time with that little girl today. People always say it's easier with someone else's child because you only get the easy stuff, but the more Brittany had thought about it today, the more she realized she was ready for the hard stuff too. The crying and the diapers, the spit up and the sleepless nights...

Santana nodded and Brittany smiled. She sat down across from Santana by the kitchen island and watched her read for a while. Santana looked so beautiful even when she was just plain like this. Her hair in a loose bun, a simple tank top and boy shorts. She had propped a foot up on her seat and rested her chin on her knee while her eyes moved over the letters on the pages. After a while the silence made Santana realize she was being watched and she just felt Brittany's eyes on her.

"You're staring." She sang without looking up.

"I can't help myself." Brittany answered playfully and casually took another gulp of her water. Santana smiled and closed the book. She stared back at Brittany for a while. The blonde's hair up and away from her face, pearl earrings and soft lips. The longer they looked; they coyer their smiles got and Brittany was the first to break away and giggle softly. Santana did an internal victory dance and reached her hand over to take Brittany's.

"So, what did you do today?" She asked curiously.

"I…" Brittany started, but her voice faded. She had done a lot of things but she had really only had one thing on her mind today. Should she say something? No, probably not. Maybe Santana wasn't as ready as she was... and what if it put a strain on their relationship or something...

"What?" Santana said gently but eagerly. Brittany pondered a while longer. She was nervous all of a sudden. She shifted in her seat. Santana raised her eyebrows. Did she ask something wrong? Brittany cleared her throat and straightened her back.

"I was just at work. Then after that I picked up my dry cleaning. I picked up yours too. I know we don't go to the same place but I passed yours when I was getting the tickets for Rachel and Tina's show because it's right around the corner. Anyways, the tickets are for next Saturday so make a note of that because Rachel will be furious if we miss it again. Oh right, and I bought those popsicles you like on my lunch break but then I forgot them at work… but I'll bring them home tomorrow, and if you want I can go out now and buy more. Or you can go. Or we can go together. I think I wanna have a baby. Someone might be reading our mail. I'm sure I saw Sandy Ryerson lurk around our mailbox just now and I can't find my phone bill anywhere. Also, do you think we need to be more eco friendly?" Brittany was rambling and she was speaking so incredibly fast that all her words sort of mashed together.

Seven of them stood out, though, and it nearly knocked Santana out of her chair. She pulled her hand back from Brittany's and held on to the black marble surface. She wasn't prepared for that one. Did Brittany know she had been thinking about it lately? Probably... Brittany always knew her better than she knew herself. She didn't mean to be so quiet but she didn't know what to say really.

Brittany felt panic slowly creep up inside her. Crap! She shouldn't have said it. It was too soon. Way too soon. She should have just kept it to herself. She hadn't even meant to say it. It just popped out. She needed to be better with holding stuff like that in. Think before you speak! There's a reason people keep saying that. Shit, how long had it been quiet now? She could take it back. Take it back now, Brittany! She didn't really want to take it back, though. She opened her mouth but it stayed there. Santana lifted her gaze.

"Okay." Santana hadn't meant for it to be a whisper but that's how it came out. Her eyes were still wide and she probably looked terrified. Yes, she had been thinking how much she wanted a family but it had still been a pretty distant idea for when they were old, so when it was here now it was a little scary. But it was good scary.

"Okay?" Brittany questioned because she almost didn't hear it and she needed to know that it wasn't a hallucination.

"Yes." Santana said, this time in a full tone of voice and with a little nod. The nod was detirmined and helped relax Santana. It felt right. This was right. She smiled and it spread all across her face.

"Yes?" Brittany asked through a little laugh. Santana's smile cracked open wider and her white teeth lightened the room with happiness.

"Let's have a baby, Britt."


	47. Chapter 47

**Well, well, well…... Brittany wants to see something give birth…... I'm still gonna leave this dangling for a while though…. YOU KNOW ME. **

Also,** Jane **_(hello Jane, thank you for being awesome) _asked about the time jump and it was from July 2015 to March 2016 ("present time"), so just a couple of months. Oh, and there will be 50 chapters so we're really getting close to the end. :)))))

_PS - have I told you lately that you're all amazing? _

**CHAPTER 47**

**"Small suit, small mind"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>March 3rd<strong>_

* * *

><p>They were in bed together. Santana on her back and Brittany on her side, with her head on Santana's chest. Neither had said anything for a while. They had decided to start a family. They were doing it. They were having a baby. They had done a happy we're-having-a-baby-dance, there was the we're-having-a-baby-song, they had laughed, and even cried a little bit. They had just had a mind blowing sex and everything felt great. But neither of them really knew where to go from here.<p>

"Are you awake?" Santana asked eventually. She kept her voice down just in case Brittany had fallen asleep. Brittany gave a little nod but silence prevailed a little longer.

"Do you know how to make a baby?" Brittany asked suddenly. Santana couldn't help but chuckle.

"Well, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much-" She started in a teasing voice.

"I know that part." Brittany interrupted jokingly and tickled Santana who giggled and started squirming under the blonde. She wrestled Brittany over on her back and pinned her hands over her head to stop the assault. She looked into Brittany's blue orbs, and even in the dark room it was incredible how deep they went.

"What about when a mommy and a mommy love each other very much?" Brittany asked quietly. Of course she had heard about adoption and insemination, sperm donors and surrogate mothers, but she didn't know how any of it really worked. Santana's smile faded.

"I don't know…" Santana said hesitantly. She scrunched her face. "Let's google it!"

Santana hopped off the bed and headed for her laptop.

"Let's sleep and google it tomorrow?" Brittany suggested with a giggle. She had to work early tomorrow and this wasn't the kind of thing you figured out in just five minutes. Santana stopped. She squinted longingly at her laptop for another second but then she shuffled back to bed.

"Fine…" She pouted and slunk back into bed. She backed her butt into Brittany and tried to act grumpy but Brittany glanced over the Latina's shoulder and saw the smile twitching in the corner of her mouth.

"You're really excited, aren't you?" Brittany chirped while propping herself up on her elbow and looking down adoringly at Santana. Santana twisted to lie on her back again.

"Well, yeah." Santana beamed with sparkling eyes. She was ready for this. She was. She wanted it so bad. She hadn't realized until tonight just how bad, but just the thought of a little baby, maybe a little mini-Brittany, made her feel so complete. "Of course I am."

"I love you." Brittany cooed and kissed Santana lips tenderly. "So much."

* * *

><p><em><strong>March 4th<strong>_

* * *

><p>Brittany came home. She walked into the kitchen and hung her coat and her blazer over a chair. She didn't know why she didn't just hang them on a hanger right away. She always had to do it later anyways. She took a bottle of water from the fridge and twisted the cap open. She was just about to take a gulp when she heard something.<p>

Was that typing? Was Santana home? But… it was almost 6 o'clock on a Friday. Santana should definitely have been at work. Brittany could barely remember the last Friday Santana didn't have to work. She snuck into the living room, although it wasn't really sneaking because her heels clicked against the hardwood floor.

Santana was sitting on the couch. She was just wearing a T-shirt and she had brought a blanket from the bedroom and draped it over her shoulders. There was a pair of inside-out jeans on the floor and three popsicle wrappers on the table. She had her laptop in her lap and she was staring into the screen with a concentrated pout. She looked like she was reading something and even when hearing Brittany's heels she didn't look up right away.

"San? You didn't go into work today?" Brittany asked carefully. Was Santana sick? Should Brittany make some soup? She didn't know how to make soup, but she could try. Santana looked up and around at the mess she had scattered around herself. She smiled sheepishly.

"I… I got distracted." She said with a coy shrug and motioned for Brittany to come sit next to her by patting the seat cushion. Brittany obliged and took a seat. Santana scooted closer until her bare thigh pressed against Brittany's skirt and she angled the computer so they could both look. It was burning up and making a quiet humming noise.

"Have you been on the computer all day?" Brittany asked amused. She kept telling Santana that she shouldn't keep the computer in her lap like that because it needed to breathe and it couldn't to that if you smothered it with blankets. Santana caught a glance of the time in the bottom corner of the screen. She hadn't even noticed time passing so fast. She had been so caught up in this. There was so much to read. Apart from all the websites with information; Santana had also found a bunch of great forums where couples talked about their experiences when trying to have a baby. Some people had been really lucky and some people had been… not so lucky.

"I… look here!" Santana clicked on one of the tabs she had up and pointed to the text. Brittany kept telling her to not touch the screen because it got greasy, but sometimes it was too difficult not to.

"It took three years for this couple to get their baby." Santana stated. Brittany's face formed a frown and her eyes moved over the screen so fast that it made Santana dizzy. Santana clicked on the second tab.

"And look, these people tried for over a year before their insemination worked." Santana informed, pointing to more letters on the screen. Brittany leaned forward and skimmed through it. Santana handed Brittany the computer so she could finish reading and then she leaned back in the couch. Brittany skimmed that story and a couple of others. Each web page had so many stories, and Santana had like seventeen tabs up. Poor computer must be so tired. Brittany nodded slowly and put the laptop on the coffee table before twisting her upper body to look at Santana, who was rubbing the palm of her left hand with the thumb of her right. She glanced up.

"This might take a lot of time, Britt…" She said quietly. It sounded sad and small and Brittany heart broke a little. She hadn't done all the research Santana had but she knew this might be a little tough at first.

"Yeah, is that okay?" Brittany asked carefully. She was okay with it. She didn't care if it took a day, or a year, or a decade. She just wanted a family with Santana. But somehow she felt like she was letting Santana down. Santana dropped her hands to her lap.

"Of course it's okay." She said quickly and shook her head. "I just didn't know how complicated this stuff was. I dunno… I guess I expected the baby to show up on our doorstep like next week." Santana continued hesitantly. After a moment's silence she chuckled because she heard how silly it sounded, but Brittany could tell she wasn't really joking. Brittany bit her lip and sat quietly by Santana's side for a while. Santana grabbed the computer again and Brittany watched as she scrolled more pages, read more stories about couples who had struggled, and scrunched her face in confusion at the information overload.

"How strongly do you feel about them being biologically yours or mine?" Santana asked suddenly and lifted her eyes to find Brittany's. It caught Brittany a little off guard. Mine or yours? What about ours?

"I… haven't thought about it." Brittany answered tentatively. Guess it didn't really matter who they were related to. But in her head their babies looked like a mash of herself and Santana. Of course, that was probably… difficult.

"Because I was out buying popsicles earlier and I walked past this adoption agency and I kinda made an appointment… It's just to talk about it, and only if you're okay with it! I can totally call and cancel." Santana explained hurriedly. She hadn't meant to do anything without talking to Brittany first but it was right there, and there were no people inside, and at first she had only meant to go inside and look, and maybe grab some pamphlets, but then the man started talking to her and it just happened so fast.

Besides, it was good to cover all bases. Especially if this was going to be so hard. Santana's eyes were pleading for Brittany not to get mad. Of course Brittany wasn't going to get mad. She just felt a little cloud of worry blow in. Santana was so excited. The times were few that Brittany had seen Santana this excited about something. She didn't want to let her down. She couldn't let her down. But she didn't know how… because she didn't have… a penis or sperm.

"No, that sounds nice. When is it?" Brittany smiled faintly. Santana looked relieved.

"Thursday." She answered with a determined nod.

* * *

><p><em><strong>March 10th, Thursday<strong>_

* * *

><p>Santana was nervous. Brittany could tell she was definitely nervous. Brittany was nervous too but not in the same way. She was more nervous about Santana. About this meeting being everything Santana hoped it would be. Santana was clutching to her hand as they walked down the street. That pressure on Brittany's hand was so scary but she held on too, hard. Brittany hadn't been there before but she could see the place approaching from afar. There were large pictures of babies and happy families in the window.<p>

"You ready?" Santana asked restlessly after they had crossed the street, and Brittany thought she was probably asking herself rather than Brittan,y but humoured her no less.

"Yes." Brittany answered surely. For a baby? She was more than ready. She wanted it so bad. And she had learned so much in this one week; it felt equivalent to twenty years of high school. She knew all about it know. She knew about inseminations. She knew about in vitro. She knew about adoptions. She knew about carrying a baby. She knew about having a partner carry a baby. She knew about giving birth. She knew about being there when someone else gave birth. She knew about breast milk and gruel. She knew around what time babies started walking, when they started talking, when they got their teeth. She had read five baby books from cover to cover and been on every baby website possible.

Their whole world had been a baby bubble, just trying to soak up every piece of information there was. So for the baby to come; she was ready. For seeing Santana hold their little one? She knew from the way Santana's eyes sparkled every time they talked about it, and the way Santana stopped them in the street to point at every baby they saw; she had never been more ready - for anything. But for this meeting? For everything that comes before? For a potentially long struggle filled with disappointment? How could you ever be ready for something like that?

Santana hugged the doorhandle. She hesitated for a moment. It wasn't even a second long and Brittany was the only one who could see it. She hugged Santana's hand harder. She was going to be there. Even if times got tough she would be there to catch Santana every time she fell. If she had to she would be stronger than she had ever been before. For Santana.

When the door opened; slow motion ceased and everything started playing fast. A man approached them with a smile so big it could probably be seen from space. He wore a tacky suit and it was at least one size too small. It was a little unflattering. He wasn't fat, or even chubby, he was just a little out of it. Maybe some lingering holiday weight, Brittany thought. He would have looked good if the suit hadn't been so small. He threw his whole body into a handshake with Santana.

"Hi, Santana. Nice to see you again." He chirped and Brittany hadn't thought it was possible but he smiled even brighter. It was kind of nice; the way he was being so happy. It calmed her. He did do this for a living and if it hadn't gotten him down, maybe Brittany didn't have to worry so much.

"Hello, Mr. Fitzel." Santana said, and when he let go of Santana's hand; Brittany reached hers out.

"Hi, I'm Brittany." She greeted politely. He shook her hand with both of his own. God, he had so much energy.

"Lovely to meet you! I'm Gordon." He greeted. "Are you a friend of Santana's?"

"What?" Brittany frowned but he was too eager to register it and opened a door to another room and waited for them to enter.

"It's okay. These things can be nerve wracking." He said and closed the door. "Let's have a seat shall we?" He continued. His voice was so friendly but Brittany was still wearing her frown.

"_He's not making sense."_ Brittany whispered to Santana who was also frowning slightly. They took a seat next to each other and Santana's hand clutched to Brittany's again. Gordon took a seat across from them and crossed one leg over the other. His already too small pants rode up his leg more and Brittany could see a strip of naked skin between where his sock ended and his pant started. It was so hairy. Long, dark hairs that contrasted with his pale skin.

Brittany thought of Santana's legs and how they were always smooth. Okay, not always because right before she got a new wax they were a little hairy. Sometimes Brittany played with it and it made Santana mad. But then she got waxed and she would rub her legs all over Brittany. And Santana's skin never got pale. Even now after months of winter she still looked tan. Okay, so they were in Cabo San Lucas over the New Year's and she got it refreshed, but still.

"So, Santana…" Gordon cleared his throat and directed his attention to Santana who caught it with anxious eyes. "… I assumed you would be bringing in your husband today?" He continued with a polite tone.

"What?" Brittany said again and turned to look at Santana. Santana looked back with an _'I have no idea what he's talking about'_ –look. The worry in Brittany flared up again. She had a bad feeling about this.

"We can't very well do much without your husband." He explained with a chuckle. It was a polite, awkward chuckle but somehow Brittany's ears heard it like evil laughter. Santana looked a little offended. Offended with his tone, with his laugh, with his facial expression.

"What about my _wife? _Because she's right here!" Santana said and tried to not let her irritation shine trough in her voice. She pulled Brittany's hand into her lap to demonstrate it further and she managed to throw Brittany an apologetic look. She had _never_ said that she'd be bringing in her husband. Santana and Gordon hadn't talked for very long when she came in here last week and he hadn't even asked her if she'd be bringing anyone. Of course she had automatically meant that she'd be bringing Brittany, and she probably should have mentioned that, but she certainly hadn't said anything about a husband, or said anything to remotely indicate it.

"Oh…" Gordon breathed.

"Yeah, OH!" Santana shot back. Gordon cleared his throat again.

"I'm sorry…-" He started and stood up again.

"That's… okay. Honest mistake." Brittany tried to lighten the tension that was quickly growing between Gordon and Santana. It was fine. It wasn't pleasant, but it was this world after all.

"No." Gordon said simply. "I'm sorry, we're not that kind of agency."

"Excuse me?" Santana was furious now. Brittan could tell by the way Santana's hand was shaking. It was already happening. Santana had already been let down. Brittany wanted to cry, but she couldn't. She had to be strong now. She promised herself she would be, so she just sucked her lips into her mouth and gave a stiff nod.

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Gordon continued and walked towards the door. He let it slide open with a light push. Then he just stood there and pointed to the opening with his whole hand. Brittany stood up first. She straightened her skirt with one hand and then pulled on the one that Santana still held onto. Santana didn't let herself be pulled to her feet, though. She didn't look up at Brittany either.

How dare he just stand there with gross face and dirty fingers? His ridiculously small suit to fit his ridiculously small mind. It was just so… rude. The way he just looked at them like they had no right to be there. They had just as much right as anyone else! They had every right! Maybe he didn't know what an amazing mother Brittany was going to be? Maybe he didn't know how much Santana would love this child? How much she already loved it? Maybe if she punched him really hard he would understand? Brittany could see everything happening between Santana's dark orbs.

"Come on, San. Let's go…" She pleaded. Santana shook her head but shot to her feet. She let go of Brittany's hand and walked towards Gordon in an almost threatening manner. He looked a little uncomfortable as he backed up, only to bump against the door frame.

"Two choices…" Santana finally said when she was so close to Gordon that Brittany was sure he could smell the sweet lady kiss she gave Santana earlier.

"Disrespect our lives again; and I crack one of your nuts – right or left – that's your choice. Or you accept the gay and live to be a douchebag another day." Santana's hand was already halfway to crushing one of his balls but Brittany really didn't want her touching his scrotum. Plus, you can't force people to accept it. It didn't work like that - it never had and it never would. Brittany also didn't think that Santana getting arrested would help when trying to start a family. So she grabbed Santana's arm.

"Santana, let's just go." Brittany begged. Santana turned her head to Brittany and looked into those blue eyes. They were so sad, so hurt. Santana's shoulders sank and she let Brittany pull her out of the room and out into the street. Santana sighed. It was cold outside but she needed to cool off so it felt good. But it was also a little windy and the way her eyes were burning from tears wasn't helped by the puffs of air irritating them.

Santana wanted to just sit down. To just squat down right there on the sidewalk and scream from the top of her lungs, but if she did that then Gordon would win. So she walked instead. With her head held high and her hand desperately clinging to Brittany's; she walked.


	48. Chapter 48

**HAPPY TACO NIGHT EVERYBODY!** Just in case I don't tell you enough – I love you and your reviews! So much! :D

I'm all done, finished with all chapters! So here's the plan;  
><strong>Sunday – Chapter 49<strong> and then on  
><strong>Tuesday<strong>, in honour of disco fever, there will be the **50****th**** and final chapter**.  
>Oh lawd, imma cry.<p>

Everybody put your hands together for a certain pretty little Irish girl (actually I don't know if you're little, how tall are you?) for listing random words. It's not really the same as a beta but equally effective. Be sure to find each and every one of them in here!

Also a shoutout to _martianinthought_ for coming off anon like a boss!

**CHAPTER 48**

**"Lump-free chocolate milk"**

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><p><em><strong>March 10th<strong>_

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><p>Santana stirred the chocolate powder into the warm milk. She stirred, and stirred, and stared at the swirl she was making. Like a hurricane stirring up the ocean. She didn't want any lumps. She needed this cup to not have any lumps in it. She was still angry. Mostly she felt like a complete idiot, though. She couldn't believe she hadn't even checked if that agency was <em>"that kind of agency"<em> as Gordon so politely had put it.

Santana snorted. She was so inconsiderate for putting Brittany through that. Brittany seemed mad. Santana had been a little afraid to ask, but she felt it in the air. After they had gotten home Santana cried like a baby for a really long time but Brittany didn't even shed a tear. Santana tried to push it away but Brittany didn't come with her when she got up earlier and that made her insecurities grow in her head.

Since the whole Beth-thing they had promised each other to always talk about it when something was bothering them. There was no running away from this. So Santana would stir this hot chocolate until it didn't have lumps in it anymore, and she would bring it to Brittany, and they would talk.

Brittany was on the couch. She was trying to be really strong. She thought she was doing an okay job. She hadn't even cried yet. Even when Santana's heartbreaking sobs filled her ears earlier she didn't cry. It was really hard because it was burning in her eyes and she had to hold Santana's head over her shoulder so she wouldn't see. Then Santana got up and Brittany stayed on the couch.

She was still sitting here. It was just so hard not to be bothered. They had only started thinking about starting a family last week and already… Don't Brittany. Be positive. She just felt like it was her fault. She could have thought of a solution before she brought the baby thing up and made Santana all excited. If she had a plan; all Santana would have had to say was _'go for it'_ and they could have gone for it and it could have been great. All this fumbling made Brittany feel like she was failing. She just wanted to give Santana the family she wanted.

"So…" Santana said in the doorway. She had been leaning against it for a while and just watched while Brittany stared into the fireplace. It didn't have a fire burning. There wasn't even a log to potentially light. It was just an empty, squarish space.

"Hey…" Brittany said and looked up at Santana for a second. For a second; Santana was hopeful, but then the blonde lowered her gaze again.

"You've been staring into that fireplace for hours now." Santana's voice and whole presence was tentative.

"Yeah." Brittany answered quietly. She wasn't going to cry. She needed to be brave. Santana took a seat next to her, but left a spacious distance between them. She wanted to grab Brittany's hand, but the blonde had stuffed them between her thighs so there was no way to do it without having to pry one loose first, and Santana didn't dare.

"I made you hot chocolate." Santana held it out in the air and waited for Brittany to reach for it. A couple of long moments went by. Santana was just about to give up and put it on the coffee table instead when Brittany decided to take the cup. She wrapped her fingers around it and let them warm up. She had tried to warm them between her thighs but this cup was already doing a much better job.

"Thanks." Brittany mumbled. She had been craving something for a while now, but she could feel how hot it still was, and she didn't want to burn her tongue, so she waited to take a sip. If she burned her tongue she knew that could be the final straw and she could start crying.

It was quiet for a while. Not really awkward, but really uncertain silence. Santana didn't know what to do with her hands so she figured it was her turn to tuck them between her thighs. It was so warm there and she was already burning up. She crossed them over her chest but then she thought maybe she looked angry if she held them like that and she didn't want to look angry right now. She wanted to be soft and gentle and inviting. She ran a strand of hair between her fingers and inspected closely to detect any split ends. Maybe she should get a haircut soon? Her hair was getting really long. But she liked it long. Brittany liked it long too. She had said so - more than once. She took a new strand and inspected that too. Maybe just cut an inch? Urgh, why was she even thinking about this now? She dropped her hair and let her hands fall to her sides.

"Are you mad at me?" Santana asked suddenly. She even caught herself off guard. Like when you're holding a gun and you know your finger is on the trigger but you're still surprised when you fire a shot. She also spoke fast because it was always easier to get it over with quickly. The worst was when you spoke too fast, though, and the other person couldn't make it out so you had to say it all over again. She hated when that happened so she knew how to do it just right.

"No." Brittany answered simply and shook her head. She finally took a sip of the hot chocolate. She held her breath while doing so because she was still scared that it would be too hot. But it was fine. It tasted really nice, more chocolaty than milky which was probably exactly what she needed right now. And there were no lumps in it. Brittany never stirred long enough for all the lumps to go away when she made chocolate milk from powder. She took another sip and tried to offer Santana a little smile. Santana didn't really see it though because she was to busy wording her apology in her head.

"I'm sorry! I should have checked if that agency did same-sexed partners. I guess I didn't even realize I had to. I didn't know it would be a problem." Santana said with an apologetic wrinkle on her forehead. She really did feel stupid but it really hadn't crossed her mind. With all the other different obstacles and difficulties she learned they might face she just sort of forgot that homophobia might also be one.

"It's fine." Brittany dismissed but she didn't stop staring into the fireplace. She didn't mean to make Santana think she was mad but this was the only way she knew to hold herself together. She had already failed Santana. She couldn't be weak too.

"Are you _sure_?" Santana wanted to know. Brittany still seemed mad and if it really was fine then that made no sense. Maybe if she thought Santana was sad; she was trying to save the fight for later? Santana didn't want to wait until later. She wanted her wife in her arms and she wanted it now!

"Yes." Brittany said. It came out harder than she intended and she bit her lip and closed her eyes. In her head that was kind of an apology for being so short in her tone, but Santana mistook it for irritation and it was frustrating to see something going on and not know what it was.

"Then why am I only getting one syllable words out of you?" Santana questioned malignantly.

"Because I'm upset!" Brittany snapped back. Her bubble was bursting and everything she was feeling was leaking out. She leaned forward and out the cup down on the table. She folded her hands in her lap and sighed quietly. Damn it!

"With me?" Santana whispered carefully. She felt bad she had been so pushy but at least now Brittany had admitted something was wrong.

"No." Brittany sighed again. She rubbed her hand over her chin like her imaginary beard was itching and she turned to face Santana. They stared at each other for a while and Santana could see in Brittany's eyes that she was truly not the reason she was sad.

"With what then?" Santana asked softly. She was getting a little irritated with herself for being so pushy but she was getting through so she didn't want to stop. She was also getting kind of angry that something was making her wife sad. She didn't know what it was yet but she already hated it. Brittany shrugged.

"With that _stupid _man? With that_ stupid_ agency? I swear, I'll have them shut down. I'm not as good with the bureaucratic stuff as you but I will find a way… Or I'll just burn it down, preferably with Gordon still inside." Santana rambled angrily. Brittany looked at Santana with wide eyes. She wanted to giggle because she loved when Santana got protective like that. It was adorable and it made her really warm inside that Santana cared so much she actually seemed serious about burning the place down. Well, she would never _seriously_ burn it down. But she would _seriously_ consider it. Just to make Brittany happy. And then when she realized that it wouldn't make Brittany happy that's when she would decide to not burn it down.

"No, I'm not mad at him." Brittany shook her head. She _was_ a little mad at him, but that's not why she was upset. Mostly guys like him just made her want to *le sigh*.

"Then who are you mad at?" Santana was getting restless from being confused. She frowned. If Brittany wasn't mad at Santana, and not Gordon, then she couldn't really see who else there was left to be mad at. Unless she was missing something? Brittany fidgeted with her ring finger. It could just have been a nervous tick but it made Santana really worried.

"Honey…?"

"My _stupid_ vagina!" Brittany grunted finally, but followed with a sigh in defeat. She wanted to hit something but lately she had made a habit of knocking things over when she was upset, and she needed to break it, so she just closed her fists.

"You're mad at your vagina?" Santana asked amused. She could see that Brittany was serious but it was still funny, and she had to chuckle.

"It's not a penis, and it doesn't have any sperm to get you pregnant." Brittany explained sullenly. Things would have been _soooo_ much easier if she would have just been a man.

"Okay, I cannot stress enough how happy I am that your vagina is not a penis." Santana protested and held her hand up like a stop sign. Even if it would simplify things; she really, really didn't want Brittany to turn into a man.

"I can't give you what you want." Brittany whispered sadly and held her head by her temples with her index –and middle fingers.

"Yes,you can!" Santana argued loudly. It sounded a little angry and she felt bad about it because it was not her intention to make Brittany feel worse. She understood where her wife was coming from, but Brittany had it all backwards.

Brittany put her hands over her mouth to hold in the tears. If she would have had enough hands she would have probably pinched her nose and covered her ears too because this whole not-crying-thing was really difficult and it felt like it was going to escape from wherever it could.

"Are you crying?" Santana asked carefully and inspected Brittany's glassy orbs. Brittany blinked away the evidence and shook her head. She wasn't crying. She was strong. She could do this. Santana stood up and Brittany thought she was leaving but then she sat back down, on her knees this time. She walked over the seat and climbed to sit behind Brittany.

It wasn't very graceful and Brittany frowned in confusion as she was trying to figure out what her wife was trying to accomplish. Santana wrapped her legs around Brittany so they locked in place in the blonde's lap, and she slid her arms in under Brittany's and hugged over her belly. Santana leaned back and pulled Brittany with her. Brittany relaxed her neck and rested her head against Santana's shoulder, feeling the Latina's breath warmly tickle her cheek.

"It's okay." Santana whispered. "You can cry."

Brittany opened her mouth to say that she didn't need to cry but instead a sob came out, and then another and another. She felt her cheeks watery and she had a big lump in her throat. Santana didn't shush her, or sing to her, or even so much as rub her thumbs where her hands rested on the blonde's belly, because Santana wasn't trying to make Brittany stop crying; she was just letting her cry.

Brittany felt weird crying like this. Usually when you cry you hunch over, or bury your face in something or curl up to a little ball; but now she was stretched out with her body so open. There was nothing to muffle her sobs or soak up her tears – there was nothing to hide behind. It was vulnerable and scary and it felt good. It felt good until her crying got so intense her lungs started hurting. Santana twisted her face so her lips touched Brittany's cheek. She didn't kiss, or brush them back and forth, she just held them there and eventually Brittany stilled.

"Babe, what's happening?" Santana murmured lovingly when she heard Brittany's breathing so calm she could probably talk again. Brittany wiped under her nose and over her cheek.

"I don't want to disappoint you." Brittany sniffled. It was easier talking like this. With Santana right, right there up against her but still without the scary eye contact.

"You couldn't." Santana ensured and shook her head against Brittany's cheek to emphasise it further.

"But I can. Santana, it's not-… not the same for us. It won't be easy and it will probably take time and then when it does happen; it won't even be our genes. It won't be a part of you and a part of me put together." Brittany argued because she still didn't believe her. Even with all the money in the world Brittany felt like she couldn't give, to the one person she loved more than anything, something so simple that most people got to just throw around.

Santana listened and bit the inside of her lip. It was quiet for a while as Santana looked around the room. Maybe right there by the table in the corner their baby would take its first step. Maybe they would have to baby proof the fireplace so baby wouldn't try to climb in there and get hurt. Maybe they'd have to change their usual spot for the Christmas tree, so they could fit more presents under there for all the kids they'd be spoiling one day.

Santana turned her eyes to the large maroon colored art work hanging on the wall. It had hung there since the very first time she got to the see the inside of this apartment. It was pretty and looked really expensive, but maybe in a couple of years they could take it down and hang one of those huge, cheesy family portraits there instead. Except theirs would be fun, like building a sandcastle on the beach, or goofing around in a jumping castle, or if they wanted something really silly; they could all smash cake in each other's faces.

Santana sighed. It wasn't that Brittany was wrong in what she was saying. She was completely right - but she was forgetting the most important part.

"DNA isn't what makes a family, you know." Santana said finally. Her tone was at ease and it relaxed Brittany somewhat. She took Santana's hand and intertwined their fingers while smiling crookedly at how their skin contrasted.

"I just wanna mix us together." Brittany said. "I want our babies to have your eyes and my nose and maybe… my dad's ears and that little birth mark Gabriela has on her elbow, you know the one Carmen has too? It's not fair that we need a stranger in the picture." Brittany got excited as she thought about all the different ways you could play with their skin tones, hair colors, eye colors, birthmarks, bone structure; but then she remembered they'd never have that and she sighed again. Santana squeezed Brittany's hand.

"I know, honey. But they'll still be _our_ babies. We'll be there for the all the firsts, they'll hear stories about grandpa Pierce. Rachel and Quinn will babysit them when we need time to ourselves, and dad will teach them his rusty old dance moves while Carmen will try her best not to teach them bad words, but fail miserably… then one day they'll come home and ask us about birds and bees and then before you know it they'll graduate high school and go off to college and then get married and have babies of their own. We will have been there for _everything,_ and it won't matter that they won't have blonde hair with brown eyes, or blue eyes with olive skin because we will love them _so _much." Santana couldn't help the grin spreading across her face as she spoke and the fact that she actually made Brittany giggle a little was a delicious cherry on top of everything. Brittany hummed in content at the picture Santana painted for her.

"And if we have to fight that much harder; it just means we'll love them that much more." Santana added and nuzzled her nose in the crook of Brittany's neck. She smelled it, and kissed it, then smelled it again. Brittany's starting point had been border lining a nervous break down and now she was having these warm, excited, safe, giddy, feelings bubbling inside her – all thanks to Santana.

"You're gonna be an amazing mom." Brittany cooed amorously. Santana puckered her lips and pressed them against Brittany's skin in a trail that led up her neck, over her cheek, and Santana craned her own neck to reach all the way to the corner of Brittany's mouth. Brittany turned her head so their lips could fully meet. The kiss was really sweet, partly because of the chocolate Brittany had sipped from but mostly from their smiles being so sweet.

"So are you." Santana mumbled; her lips moving against Brittany's as she said it. Brittany brought her hand up to cup Santana's cheek. They got more and more lost in the kiss and suddenly they tipped over. They started laughing and Brittany did a 180 between Santana's legs to lie facing her wife instead. Santana slid her hand under Brittany's shirt and placed it over her belly. She stroked over it, feeling her thumb dip slightly into Brittany's bellybutton with each stroke.

"What do you say we keep our adoption-eyes open, but maybe focus on finding some sperm?" Santana suggested shyly and looked down at her hand. Brittany's hand travelled down Santana's side and lifted Santana's shirt up best she could in the horizontal position. She brushed her fingertips over Santana's stomach.

"I'd like that." Brittany answered tenderly and leaned in to kiss Santana's nose. Santana gave a skew smile and caught Brittany's lips with her own when the blonde to pull away. She ran her tongue slowly over Brittany's upper lip but just as the lips parted to let it in; Santana pulled away.

"Sooo… are you still mad at your vagina?" Santana asked carefully as her fingers trailed south and played around the hem of Brittany's jeans.

"No… not so much." Brittany answered playfully and shook her head. Santana smirked.

"Can she come out and play?"

* * *

><p><em>But who's carrying the baby... ? I know and you don't know, lahlalalalalaah :D <em>


	49. Chapter 49

I'm having the best time on tumblr right now! The best time! Thank you :)

So this chapter is slightly shorter and **different.** You might not like it and I completely understand if you don't **BUT** it serves its purpose soooooo... try to figure it out and feel free to guess away!

_Mind the time jump from March to July. _

**CHAPTER 49**

"**Just wait"**

* * *

><p><em><strong>July 13th, Wednesday<strong>_

* * *

><p>"I know last time didn't work…"<p>

"Or the time before that, or the time before that."

"But we knew it might… take a while. People have waited longer than this."

"I know but... you know that movie…?"

"Which one?"

"_He's just not that into you_…"

"Who's not into me? Have you met me? I'm hot."

"I'm serious…"

"Okay, sorry. What about it?"

"They talk about how you always think you're the exception… I guess, I thought… we would be the exception."

"I… thought so too."

"Oh well, guess not…"

"So, when's your period supposed to come? I mean… _not_ come… hopefully."

"Today or maybe tomorrow…"

"Okay, so we'll just wait."

"Just wait."

…

"So did it…?"

"It's been five minutes…"

"Okay, no worries. We'll just wait."

"Yeah. Just wait."

...

"I was gonna go to the store. Do you wanna come?"

"Hmm… no. Too hot outside."

"You're outside now."

"The balcony doesn't count! I don't have to move here."

"_So lazy…" _

"But you love me _so_ much!"

"Well, that's debatable…"

"…"

"Kidding!"

"If you're going to the store, will you pick up some more oatmeal?"

"Oatmeal?"

"Yes, please. And raisins and cinnamon."

"We don't even know if you're pregnant yet and I'm already waiting on you hand and foot."

"And that is why I love _you_ so much."

...

"I'm back."

"Did you get the oatmeal?"

"So hungry for oatmeal…"

"I'm sorry! I just really feel like some porridge."

"Is that a craving?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like a pregnancy craving? Does it feel like a craving? Are you pregnant?"

"I don't know."

"But you didn't get your period?"

"No… not yet."

"That's good! That's really good!"

"You're getting your hopes up…"

"I know, but… I can't help it. What if it worked this time?"

"What if it didn't?"

"Then we try again. Mark my words – I will knock you up!"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

...

"Are you sure you don't wanna check now?"

"Yes."

"Even if it's negative now, doesn't mean it won't be positive tomorrow."

"Then why even take one now?"

"Because… your panties are so clean."

"Look, I didn't get my period yet so that's really good, but I might still get it… let's wait until tomorrow to take a test… please?"

"Okay… but I'm only doing this because, because… because-"

"...Couldn't think of anything good?"

"No…"

"You're the cutest."

"_You can be the cutest…"_

"What are you mumbling about? Come to bed."

"Oh hello, sexual kissing."

"I want to get sexual."

"What about-"

"If this has to do with me maybe being pregnant Imma stop you right there!"

"What?"

"You are not going to withhold sex for any part of this pregnancy. Not before, not during, not after- I mean, except the part after where you have to wait, but once that's over and we can get out sweet lady kisses on again, it's not fair if you-"

"Rambling…"

"My point is; this baby needs sex."

"Well, when you put it like that, it just sounds… really perverted."

"You know what I mean… mommy needs it."

"_Mommy…" _

"I'm jumping the gun here, huh?"

"No. For tonight let's just pretend all this waiting doesn't exist. Let's just pretend we're…"

"… mommies?"

"Mommies."

* * *

><p><em><strong>July 14th, Thursday<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Good morning, sweetie."<p>

"Mmm, smells nice."

"I made toast."

"I'm actually not that hungry."

"Is it morning sickness? Do you feel nauseous?"

"Honey…"

"I know… Hopes up…"

"I still didn't get my period, though."

"Yes! Okay so… let's say you still haven't gotten it by tonight; should we do a test?"

"…"

"I take that smile as a yes?"

"I _really_ hope I don't get it."

"I thought we weren't hoping?"

"No, we can hope. We have to hope, right?"

"Yeah, babies only want to stick to happy uteruses."

"Kiss me."

"What?"

"Kiss me. Then I'll be really happy and my uterus will be happy and the baby will stick."

"Aw, sweetie. You're gonna have to pry my lips away with tongs today."

...

"Is it time?"

"I dunno… maybe a little while longer?"

"Really? In that case we need a distraction or I won't be able to wait."

"Monopoly?"

"Hmmm…"

"Movie? Massage?-"

"Masturbation?"

"…"

"Sorry, I thought we were droppin' Ms."

"Menstruation…"

"Babe…"

"I'm sorry. This sucks. I feel like I'm walking on needles."

"Want me to kiss you again?"

"…Yes."

...

"Oh my God."

"Where are you- the movie just- where are you going?"

"…"

"Don't slam the-"

"…"

"I'm coming in."

"…"

"Honey, are you crying?"

"I'm sorry."

"Oh… did you get it? You got it. That's okay… We'll try again. It's fine, sweetheart. We won't give up. It's gonna happen for us. It will, I promise. Here, pinky promise. And until-"

"I didn't get it."

"You didn't?"

"It just felt like it and I freaked out. I'm sorry."

"No, no, no, don't be sorry. This is good!"

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

"It's good."

"It's really good."

...

"Hold the stick."

"Did you pee on it?"

"Yes, of course. How else will it know?"

"Oh. I don't wanna hold it."

"Why?"

"What if I jinx it?"

"… I don't wanna hold it either now."

"Just put it on the counter."

"No, it needs love."

"The stick needs love?"

"Yes."

"Okay, we'll hold it together."

"I need to pull my pants up."

"Leave it. Nothing I haven't seen before."

"Well, that's true…"

"Over and over and over again..."

"Stop it."

"Just hold the stick with me."

"How long have we been waiting for?"

"Since you peed."

"How long is that?"

"I don't know."

"Okay, we'll just wait."

"Instructions say _'place on __flat, dry surface with the result window facing up'_…"

"We didn't do that the last three times. And what about the love?"

"Here… we'll just put it down… _put it down_… good. And we'll hug."

"I'm nervous."

"I know. C'mere."

"You smell nice."

"You too."

…

"I think it's been five minutes."

"Just… hold me a little longer."

"Your heart is beating really fast."

"So is yours."

"You ready to look?"

"Yes."

"I'm not."

"No?"

"Okay."

"Wait."

"Okay."

"No."

"You look."

"No, you do it."

"I'll look."

"Wait. Okay, no. You look. Oh God."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Wh- what does it say?"

"You're… you're not pregnant."

"Oh."

"Fuck it! These things are wrong all the time!"

"Honey, I don't think-"

"No! Pregnant until proven on period!"

"I'm sorry."

"…"

"Shhh… don't cry. C'mere."

"Damn it!"

"I know. We'll try again. It will happen for us, you said that, remember?"

"Yeah, I know."

"Let's go to bed."

...

"_I can't sleep."_

"_Me neither." _

"What are you thinking about?"

"Probably the same thing you are…"

"Kinda hard not to think about it, huh?"

"Really hard."

"You know, it doesn't really matter."

"That's sweet, but you don't mean that."

"I mean, it matters. Obviously it matters; I really want this, but…"

"But?"

"But even _if _– and I'm saying this as a big, fat, hypothetical, dreamland, fantasy, imaginary if, because it _will _happen for us – but even _if _it never happens; I'll still be the happiest woman alive as long as I'm with you."

"Santana…"

"Please say you believe me. Please."

"Will you sing to me?"

"What do you wanna hear?"

"Just… your voice."

"Are you crying?"

"I just… _please_ sing to me."

"Of course_… _

_Come stop you crying, it will be alright  
><em>_Just take my hand, hold it tight  
><em>_I will protect you from all around you  
><em>_I will be here, don't you cry_

_For one so small you seem so strong  
><em>_My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm  
><em>_This bond between us can't be broken  
><em>_I will be here, don't you cry_

_Cause you'll be in my heart  
><em>_Yes, you'll be in my heart  
><em>_From this day on, now and forever more  
><em>_You'll be in my heart, no matter what they say  
><em>_You'll be here in my heart, always"_

* * *

><p><em><strong>July 17th, Sunday<strong>_

* * *

><p>"Lookin' good, pretty lady."<p>

"I just woke up…"

"Still sexy."

"… and I'm flossing."

"I love it when you talk dirty."

"You're weird."

"What's that saying again?"

"Which one?"

"Whoever smelt it, dealt it."

"What? That makes no sense."

"Some things aren't supposed to make sense…"

"I don't even…- What are you smirking about?"

"Just things."

"Yeah? What kind of things?"

"You in that top… amongst other things."

"Amongst other things? You're being very mysterious…"

"Is it turning you on?"

"Yes."

"Let's do something about that then."

"What about your period?"

"What period?"

"The one you're on."

"I'm not on my period."

"But the test said- you're supposed to- it's been days?"

"I'm not on my period."

"Oh."

"I'm not on my period!"

"Wait, why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't wanna disappoint you again…"

"Honey…"

"I'm sorry…"

"So... did you pee?"

"Not yet…"

"Do you have to pee?"

"Kind of…"

"Do you wanna pee right now?"

"Ye-"

"Oh my God! Let's pee."

"Stop saying _pee_."

"Quicker!"

"I can undo my pants myself, thank you very mu- okay, okay, peeing!"

"…"

"…"

"Wait! There's no stick! Hold on! Hold it!"

"It's… I can't, I already started. Unwrap it quick, before I run out of pee!"

"Okay, here!"

"Thanks."

"Are you aiming right?"

"I… yes."

"You sure?"

"You're really watching me pee, aren't you?"

"What? I've seen you pee before, like a lot."

"I know… but you're really looking now."

"I'll turn around."

"No, no it's okay. I'm done anyways."

"Did you pee at least five seconds like the instructions say?"

"Nothing about that pee was like the instructions say…"

"What if-"

"It's fine. We can do another; we have like seven more. Here, I'll drink water."

"It's 09:23 so at 09:28 we'll know."

"So… just wait?"

"Yeah, just wait."

…

"Hey, Britt?"

"San?"

"My hopes are up."

"Yeah, mine too."

"Wanna do a countdown?"

"Okay, yeah."

"Wait, it's already 07:29, though."

"So just look then?"

"No, let's…"

"… take a moment?"

"Uh-huh."

"I love you and if we're not… then we're not, and it's fine, and we'll try again, kay?"

"Yeah, what's important is we're together and we're doing this and one day…-"

"Oh my God!"

"Oh my God what? Did you look? Did you see? What does it say?"

"Oh my God look! Look, Santana, look!"

"What does that mean? Are we…?"

"We are!"

"WE'RE PREGNANT!"

* * *

><p>The song was; <strong><em>You'll be in my heart by Phil Collins. <em>**


	50. Chapter 50

**CHAPTER 50**

**"Anything's possible"**

* * *

><p><em>June 1st, 2020<em>

* * *

><p><em>Santana looked down. Curled up against her chest was the warm baby girl she had just given birth to. Santana's whole body ached. Over by the window in the stale hospital room Brittany was wiping nutella from Marlon's cheeks. He even had some in his blonde locks of hair. That was one of the few ways to tell which was which. James and Marlon looked so much alike, but Marlon was always the messier eater. Brittany flinched when she heard the hospital bed creak.<em>

_"Where are you going?" Brittany asked worriedly and rushed to her feet, hurrying over to Santana's side. Within a matter of seconds; Marlon had nutella all around his mouth again and James dropped his sandwich on the floor. It would have to wait. Their mommy and baby sister needed Brittany's attention more right now. Santana tried to get up but Brittany stood in the way so she couldn't. It was frustrating._

_"I need to find my dad. He needs to see her and hold her. I need him to hold her." Santana explained quietly and tried to swing her legs off the edge of the bed but Brittany caught them and tucked them right back in under the covers._

_"But you really, really shouldn't be on your feet." Brittany protested stubbornly. It wasn't more than two hour ago that Santana had given birth and Brittany wasn't about to let her wander around the hospital._

_"Brittany…" Santana begged in a sigh. Brittany didn't understand. Álvaro was here somewhere. Santana didn't know what room he was in but after his heart attack he was admitted to this very hospital and if he wasn't going to wake up tomorrow Santana needed him to hold his granddaughter today. She tried to stand up again but it hurt. Moving hurt._

_"No, lie back down!" Brittany persisted and gently pushed Santana down by the shoulders. It felt good to relax her muscles again. Her eyelids felt heavier. But she needed…_

_"You take her. Take her to dad. Take the boys too." Santana pleaded with tears in her eyes. She had cried so much lately. Sad tears and happy tears; it was a miracle she had any left. She held their girl out for Brittany to take her._

_"Santana…" Brittany murmured with a pained wrinkle between her brows._

_"Please!" Santana cried. "Please go find him." She continued in a whisper and closed her eyes in relief when she felt the light baby girl lift from her heavy arms. Brittany cradled the little one lovingly in one arm and reached her other hand out to the boys by the window._

_"Come on, boys. We're going to see grandpa." She cooed softly. James was faster and placed his chubby hand in Brittany's. Marlon came after and wrapped an arm around Brittany's leg. It was a little harder for her to walk but she let him hold on there as they left the room where Santana was already drifting off to sleep._

_Seconds, minutes, hours later; Santana woke up from little fuzzy baby noises. She opened her eyes and saw Brittany cradling the little one in her arms._

_"I think she's hungry." Brittany whispered but Santana ignored it and hurried to sit up more upright._

_"What did he say?" Santana asked eagerly, staring at the dark head of hair wrapped in the pale pink blanket. Brittany was staring at the same thing but raised her gaze, only to reveal the tears in her eyes._

_"He loved her very much." Brittany said softly. There was something sad in her voice to match her eyes, and it alarmed Santana._

_"Is he okay?" She asked quickly and watched as the pained wrinkle between Brittany's brows grew deeper._

_"He loved her very much." Brittany repeated; her voice on the verge of breaking. She rocked their girl to comfort herself and try to keep it together. Santana felt her chest fill up with things too large to fit in there. Her insides were being crushed by it. Her heart was being crushed._

_"Brittany?" She questioned. It was a plea for denial._

_"He loved her, Santana. He will always love her. Always." Brittany said again. She kept her voice strong enough to not break but her eyes failed and a tear fell from the corner of her eye._

_"No…" Santana whispered and shook her head. She closed her eyes really hard. Her stomach hurt. Like someone had stabbed it. Stabbed it and twisted the knife around in there. "It's not true. It's not true. It's not… true." She mumbled to herself; holding her sobs in with a hand over her mouth. Oh God, her stomach hurt! Brittany stood up and bent down over her, lowering their baby onto Santana's chest._

_"Hold your daughter. Hold your baby girl." Brittany murmured and, with a final little kiss on the dark, fuzzy hair; she stood up again. She motioned for the boys to come over, and she lifted them to place one on each knee. She wrapped her arms safely around them and rocked her whole body back and fourth. She peppered their cheeks and bright, blonde hair with kisses and then she started singing. Ever so quietly, she sung a tone, just barely loud enough to be heard over Santana's cries._

_"Come stop you crying, it will be alright…"_

_Santana felt the small girl jerk on her chest and she held on to the bundle closer. The warmth wrapped her up and even though she felt like she would never stop crying; it did feel better with her baby right there. But Santana's stomach still hurt. It hurt so bad._

_"… just take my hand, hold it tight. I will protect you from all around you…"_

_It hurt. It hurt so much she couldn't handle it anymore. She needed to wake up. She needed to wake up!_

Santana gasped for air. Her eyes shot open wider than they had ever been before but she still didn't see a thing in the pitch dark room. She exhaled slowly. She could hear from the light almost snoring that Brittany was right there. It calmed her. But her stomach still hurt. She was awake now so why didn't it go away? Oh no wait, it started to fade slowly.

She fumbled furiously on the nightstand by the side of the bed until she felt her familiar, squarish phone between her fingers. She lit the screen. All it revealed was the time. No missed calls and no texts. That was a good thing! The hospital would have called if he got worse, and since they hadn't, he must have been stable. Her dad was stable.

Breathing became easier again but in the faint light the screen provided; she could see how her hand was shaking. She needed to pee too. She always needed to pee. She tried to hold it. It lasted only a couple of minutes before she really, really had to go.

She stood up, taking her time before shifting her weight to her feet. She didn't want to get a head rush since she was already not feeling great. She wobbled into the bathroom and flicked the right light switch. It was for the soft lighting. The one that didn't burn your eyes and blinded you when you went to the bathroom in the middle of the night. She splashed some cold water on her face. That dream was scary. It was so real. It was scary because her dad was really in the hospital and it was scary because-

She didn't had time to finish the thought before her stomach started hurting again. It just pinched together really tight and there was no release. It just kept pinching. She grabbed onto the sink with both hands and squeezed until her knuckled turned white. Fuck, this hurt! She clenched her jaw and held back a tortured groan. She didn't want to wake Brittany after all.

Oh, oh, release. It felt good. But she still needed to pee. She hiked her nightgown up and her panties down and sat on the porcelain bowl. At first nothing came out. She really needed to pee but nothing came out. She sat and sat; just waiting. She was afraid to push hard because she was afraid her stomach would hurt again if she did, but she pushed a little, and she heard the gentle ripple of her pee hitting the water.

Then it kind of splashed. How did she pee that much at once? She had never done that before. It didn't even feel like peeing…. Aooow! Fuck her stomach! It was hurting again. Why was someone messing with her? She was so sleepy and just wanted to go back to bed! She rubbed her hands over her belly to sooth it. It didn't work at first but then it calmed down again. In fear of the pain coming back; she was afraid to stop rubbing her tummy. She felt the huge, taut mound it had become. Then something kicked and everything just fell into place.

**~~~ April 20, 2017 ~~~**

_Brittany was on her back on the couch. She was lying along the length of it and rested her shoulders against the armrest so she could keep her head high enough to see her beautiful wife. Santana was lying on her stomach, her upper body on top of Brittany's legs and her own legs bent at the knees and up in the air._

_"Duérmete mi niños, duérmete mi amor..." Santana sung as her hands caressed the naked belly soothingly, and in between lines she pressed kisses against the stretched skin._

_"Duérmete pedazosdemi corazón…"_

_Brittany hummed along. Even though she didn't know the words; she recognized the tune. Santana insisted on singing them to sleep - every night. They weren't listening right now though._

_"San?" Brittany murmured. She ran her hand through Santana's hair and hugged the back of her neck._

_"Hmm?" Santana hummed while pressing her lips against the bulging stomach again._

_"I think I'm having contractions." Brittany said calmly with a little scrunch of her face. Santana froze. Her lips stayed in place but her widened eyes peered up. They locked with Brittany's for a second before the Latina shot up to sit straddling over Brittany's legs instead._

_"Are you sure?" Santana asked._

_"No." Brittany giggled with a little shake of her head. "But it's been hurting a little every fifteen minutes for the last hour…"_

_"Oh my God." Santana squealed happily and covered her smile with a hand._

**~~~ . ~~~~**

Holy shit, it was happening! At first Santana didn't know what to do so she just sat on the toilet and stared. Her contractions were coming much closer together than Brittany's did when she went into labour. At least it felt like they did. Maybe she was already in the second stage? Was it possible to sleep through the first one? She rose to her feet again and headed back to the bedroom. In the doorway her stomach pinched again and this time she couldn't hold back the groan.

"Brittany!" She called, holding on to the doorframe for deal life. She heard her wife mumble something incoherent.

"Brittany!" She repeated even louder with the pain and frustration shining through in her voice. She saw Brittany's silhouette sit up and soon the bedside lamp lit the room gently.

"Are you okay?" Brittany asked hurriedly, slinging the covers aside and standing up quicker than lightning.

"It's happening! She's coming!" Santana gritted. "Santana Jr. is coming now!"

Brittany's eyes went wide.

"Okay, honey. Just breathe." Brittany said and tried to sound calm. She walked over to Santana and guided her to the bed. Santana thought sitting down would hurt less, but instead it hurt more so she stood up again. That hurt even worse. Was this pain just going to increase?

"How close together are they coming?" Brittany asked.

"I don't knoooow." Santana whined. Her pain threshold had always been lower than Brittany's but this was just ridiculous. She definitely thought she was more badass than this.

"Fuck, Britt! How the fuck did you do this?" Santana questioned, almost angrily, hunched over and hugging her stomach.

"I had a really, really great wife to guide me through it." Brittany said lovingly with a quick kiss on the top Santana's head.

"Right now I really need you to breathe, sweetheart." She continued and demonstrated the soothing breaths she wanted Santana to take. Breathe in. Fuck. Breathe out. Fuck. Breathe in. Fuck. Breathe out. It kind of helped. Brittany's hands rubbing up and down her arms helped too.

"Can you sit?" Brittany cooed gently. Santana forced a nod and bent her knees. This time sitting down felt kind of nice. The pain was easing again. Brittany squatted down between her legs and rubbed her thighs instead. Santana liked it; having Brittany looking up at her instead of down at her.

"Here's what we're gonna do, okay?" Brittany needed Santana to confirm before she could continue. Santana forced another nod to encourage her wife to continue.

"I'll call the hospital and let them know we're coming in, and then I'll drive us there right away, okay?"

Santana nodded again.

"But first I'll go wake up your mom, and her and Carmen can get the boys ready and they'll be right behind us, okay?"

Nod, nod, nod. Brittany's voice was really nice to listen to. Santana wanted to keep hearing it.

"Will you be okay to just wait here for a couple minutes?" Brittany asked and stood up. Santana stopped her by grabbing her hand. She was grumpy and sleepy and she was scared of being alone. What if she did something wrong?

Brittany squatted down again, taking Santana's other hand too and giving each one a tender kiss. Brittany leaned up and kissed Santana's lips once as well. Brittany leaned away and her legs flexed to push herself up again but Santana grabbed the back of her neck with both hands and pulled her in for another kiss. Santana kissed hurriedly and desperate whereas Brittany kissed back softly and comfortingly. She was so calm. She was almost like that scary calm before a storm only she wasn't threatening to conjure a hurricane.

"Image holding her." Brittany spoke kindly. "Just like when you held Marlon and James for the first time."

Santana nodded again. Her iron hold on Brittany loosened and the blonde scurried out of the room to do all the things she said she would. Santana smiled and blinked away a few tears.

**~~~ April 20, 2017 ~~~**

_Brittany squeezed Santana's hand really tight. Really, really tight. It loosened as she hurried out methodical breaths, as per Santana's guidance, and then it tightened again during another push. Santana was crying more than Brittany was and screaming just as loud. It amused Brittany and made everything easier._

_"Yes! You're doing so great, babe!" Santana screamed even though she was right there by Brittany's ear. Brittany started laughing but it morphed to a roar when pain took over her mind again. It was so loud; all the chaotic murmur and the screaming. It was so loud Santana didn't even notice it had happened until the doctor lifted up the little boy and handed him to her. He was so gross but so beautiful and she never wanted to let him go. She counted everything – two legs, two arms, ten fingers, ten toes, a really tiny penis, and a gorgeous baby face._

_"Hi, handsome." She chuckled as he stared back up at her, looking a little frightened, but also fascinated. He made a sound similar to a hiccup and it scared him so much he started crying._

_"I know." Santana cooed, sympathetic to the overwhelming sensation of being brought into this world. He was cleaned up and brought to curl up against Brittany's chest. They got exactly nine and a half minutes to cuddle with him until it was once again go time..._

**~~~ . ~~~~**

Santana could hear people shuffling around in the apartment now. Her eyes flew to the door as it slid open. She thought it was Brittany coming back but instead she saw a blonde little boy rush over to her. In the weak light she couldn't make out if it was Marlon or James. They looked so much alike. Guess they don't call it twins for nothing.

"Mommy? Ar'yo'kay?" He spoke and that's when she knew it was James. Their voices were identical to everyone else, but Santana and Brittany quickly learned the different ways they pronounced things and the way their voices rose in different places.

"Hi, Jamie." She greeted softly. She reached out and grabbed under his arms and lifted him. She sat him on her lap. Her lap was a little crowded with the big belly stealing most of the space, but he fit out on her knee.

"I'm fine, sweetie. Your baby sister is on her way." Santana cooed lovingly and felt his hands rub over her stomach knowingly. His sensitive touch was so warm that she barely had to cringe when the next contraction hit her without warning. She forced a smile at him.

"Is your brother awake?" She asked, trying to sound carefree as ever but she saw the worry in his eyes as he shifted to look from where his hands were caressing to her dark orbs.

"Grandma woked us up." He answered with a serious nod. She didn't like that he saw her in pain so she wrapped her arms around him and pressed him closer in a hug. His short arms didn't even reach her back but he tried his best to hug back. He was so brave.

"Mommy and I need to leave soon so you need to let grandma get you dressed and then her and auntie C will take you to the hospital, okay?" Santana murmured between peppering kisses on the top of his head. He nodded against her but he wasn't letting go unless she was, and his smell was too good to tear away from right now.

"There you are." Brittany said suddenly and caught their attention. Santana helped James back to his feet and a little chill went through her when she no longer borrowed from his warmth. Without Brittany or Santana reminding him; he hurried out the door to find Granma Lopez.

"Are you ready?" Brittany asked and helped Santana back to her feet. Just when she stood up straight her stomach started hurting again and she latched onto to Brittany for the blonde to help her keep standing.

"Fuuuuck." She cursed and was really glad James wasn't there to hear her anymore. She filled her fists with Brittany's shirt and pulled on it so hard she thought it would stretch to break. Brittany just let her, and discretely breathed in the rhythm she needed Santana to copy.

"They're coming closer together." Santana informed as it started calming down again.

"We need to get going." Brittany said calmly and draped Santana's arm over her shoulders to help hold her up as they started walking towards the exit. Santana suddenly stopped.

**~~~ April 20, 2017 ~~~**

_Everything started over again. Brittany's clinging to her hand, Brittany's screaming, Brittany's exhausted headshakes that said she didn't want to do it anymore._

_"I can't do it, Santana. I can't. Do it for me, please!" Brittany begged and ignored the midwife's constant nagging about pushing._

_"I'll do the next one, but you're doing so great, sweetie!" Santana encouraged and brushed away damp hair from Brittany's forehead. Brittany stared up at her._

_"The next one?" She chuckled questioningly._

_"You told me once that you wanted three; I'm holding you to it." Santana spoke lovingly with a crooked smile. Their moment was interrupted by the midwife._

_"Brittany if you don't push-" She started and but then Brittany interrupted her right back with a scream so loud Santana was sure people on the other side of the world could hear it. Santana wasn't sure if she was trying to break the bones in Brittany's hand - or if Brittany was trying to break hers; but with the combined effort; another scream - a baby one - filled the room._

_Little James started weeping again when he heard his younger brother's distraught cries. Santana got to scoop up Marlon too and she marvelled at how much perfection could fit into her arms. She touched his belly with her finger and his tiny fists jerked and closed around her wrist, holding her with every last ounce of his baby strength. A sob escaped her and she knew; if she could remember this, and everything about this day, she'd never need anything else._

**~~~ . ~~~~**

"I just need to kiss Marlon." Santana said. The feeling filled her overwhelmingly fast.

"He'll be right behind us." Brittany tried and took another step that Santana refused to take with her.

"Just one kiss." She insisted and called Marlon's name until another blonde little boy toddled down the hallway. Santana was just about to bend down to him when Brittany did it for her and lifted the boy up to Santana's height. Santana grabbed his cheeks and kissed his nose and forehead. He chuckled and tried to wipe the mommy saliva from his face. Santana giggled at how he scrunched his face together.

"Be good for grandma." She instructed and flicked his nose. Brittany put him back down. He half ran back to where he came from, which was probably hiding from Gabriela so he wouldn't have to take his Spiderman pyjamas off.

"Santana, we really need to go."

...

When they got the hospital Brittany had forced Santana down in a wheelchair. She had tried to resist it at first, out of pride, but she had to admit it had felt really nice to sit, so she was glad Brittany had insisted. Brittany probably knew she was going to like sitting. She was the one who had gone through this before after all.

When they came to their room Santana got to lie down which felt even better, but her back hurt a little. Their OB/GYN was amazing and showed up almost immediately. Santana decided she was going to bake a pie for her as a thank you. She deserved a pie. She deserved a million pies. Karen had been great from the very start and the fact that she was here now, at five in the morning, chipper as ever; was admirable. Brittany had thought Santana was going to hate Karen for being so perky all the time, and honestly; it was something Santana usually hated. But she was just too happy to hate… anything.

Santana was getting nervous though. She was almost fully dilated, which meant almost ready, which meant almost about to start pushing. She had no idea how to push out a baby. It didn't matter that she had read a thousand books about it or that Brittany had told her all about her experience. It didn't even matter that she had been there first hand for both Nathaniel's birth and the birth of her sons. Right now she had no fucking clue what she doing. So she held on to Brittany's hand. She soaked up all the little things Brittany whispered to her. She basked in every kiss Brittany pressed against her skin.

"I know it's been decided since forever but do we really wanna call her Santana Jr.?" Santana asked suddenly. Brittany let her kiss linger on Santana's temple a little longer because it caught her a little off guard. Marlon and James were names Brittany had been pretty set on since she was 10 years old and her dad introduced her to old movies. Of course if Santana hadn't liked those names they would have never chosen them, but she did, so they did. Santana Jr. was just something she had blurted a long time ago and it kind of stuck. She hadn't even considered another name for their baby girl.

"Not if it doesn't feel right for you…" Brittany spoke softly and stroked some hair away from Santana's forehead.

"I was thinking…" Santana murmured, but then another contraction welled over her and she had to clench her jaw. She clenched around Brittany's hand and she clenched the sheet too.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!" Santana mumbled repeatedly. Brittany's face; seeing Santana hurting so much, was tortured. She never realized she would ache this much just from watching. She didn't even want to begin imagining what she put Santana through three years ago when she was the one lying in the hospital bed and Santana was the one hoping to offer enough support just by letting her hand be squeezed. Suddenly every pained facial expression, every broken word, every hurting breath Santana took that day made so much more sense.

But Brittany was doing great. She was there, by Santana's side, the whole time and she said all the right things. They were the perfect combination of comforting, supporting and distracting. She was funny too and had Santana laughing through her last two contractions. Santana hoped she had been as wonderful to Brittany as Brittany was being to her. Brittany didn't know she was thinking about that but if she had; she would have assured Santana that she was.

The pain eased once again and they took a moment to calm down. The pressure on Brittany's hand softened and the breaths they both took became less shallow.

"… you were thinking?" Brittany cooed after a while. Santana closed her eyes and tried to remember what they had talked about before. When she opened her eyes again they were much coyer and almost a little uncertain.

"What about Brittana?" Santana asked carefully.

"Brittana?" Brittany furrowed her eyebrows. It wasn't from scepticism or dislike, she just had never heard that before.

"It's like us. You and me. Merged into one." Santana said, still sounding tentative but filled with smiles that were just aching to break free.

"Brittana Lopez-Pierce…" Brittany tasted it on her tongue and then the corners of her mouth started twitching upwards. "I like it."

Santana let her teeth show in a wide smile.

"Yeah?" She questioned hopefully and happily.

"I do." Brittany confirmed.

"I do too." Santana nodded bashfully. They fell into silence for a while and then they had to breathe through another contraction. Santana thought each new one hurt more than the one before. They snuck up on her too. Just when she started relaxing and forgetting about them another one hit her.

Brittany was keeping track of how close together they were and how long they lasted. She did it so gracefully Santana barely even noticed it. Then when nurses came in and asked; Brittany gave them all the answers without even having to think about it. Santana was so glad Brittany was there with her. She couldn't have done any of this without her. Brittany never left her side. Even when Santana wanted ice or needed something; Brittany just sent someone else, mostly random strangers, and kept her seat on the chair to the right of Santana's bed.

"Alrighty! Are we ready for another looksie?" Karen chirped in question as she came through the door with her little clipboard in hand. Brittany glanced at Santana.

"Okay." Santana answered simply and watched Karen disappear from her sight as she dove to look between her legs. It didn't even fell weird. Santana remembered the first time Karen was down there. That wasn't comfortable at all, but now it was almost second nature. Santana locked her eyes in Brittany's as they waited for the verdict.

"Well, well, well… you're ready, Santana. 10 cm." Karen happily informed when she popped her head up again. Santana's heart skipped a beat. Brittany was quick to calmingly rub her thumb over the back of Santana's hand.

"You're ready." Brittany whispered and Santana nodded knowingly. She was on alert now, so she felt the contraction coming this time and braced herself. It was a big one.

"Holy fuck!" Santana cursed between her teeth. Brittany was showing her how to breathe again but it was too difficult to mimic. She was sure her lungs didn't work so she shook her head to let Brittany know she couldn't. Brittany wasn't going to accept her wife not breathing so she tugged on Santana and did everything even clearer.

"Where's mom? Is she here yet?" Santana groaned in agony. This thing was about to start and she wanted her mom in there.

"Carmen just sent me a text saying they're on their way, okay?" Brittany informed. Getting the boys ready with clothes and giving them something to eat had taken a while. The terrible twos might have been over but they were both stubborn little buggers. People say they got it from their mamas. Santana suddenly realized she didn't have her phone with her. She needed her phone. What if they called about her dad?

"Where's my dad?" She hadn't even meant to ask out loud but it hit her so suddenly she couldn't hold it.

"Honey…" Brittany hummed sadly and slid her lips back and forth over the back of Santana's hand.

"Brittany, I need my dad." Santana desperately informed with her eyes wide and panicking. Brittany hesitated, but only for a second.

"I'll be right back!" She spoke quickly and kissed Santana's forehead before she darted off, leaving Santana's side for the first time. Karen was done scribbling something on her clipboard and she peered up.

"Okay, Santana. Let's get this show on the road!" She chirped and clicked her pen twice. Santana looked around a little confused. She was alone now.

"But…-" She tried to protest but her voice was so small.

"Babies don't wait…" Karen interrupted and before Santana knew it; she was surrounded by nurses. Even with all the people there now the room felt colder and lonelier and scarier. Suddenly Karen was between her legs again. Santana was so confused, and lost, and Brittany still wasn't back.

"Are you ready to start pushing?" Karen asked. Her perky tone actually managed to anger Santana this time. No, she wasn't ready. She didn't have anyone's hand to hold, or someone to show her how to breathe. She wasn't ready to do all this alone. She shook her head violently. She tried to close her legs. Maybe if she just held it in a little longer Brittany would come back. Karen pried them open again.

"I'm afraid you don't have that much of a choice. She's coming." Karen said and now she sounded serious.

"I need my family!" Santana exclaimed before a contraction tightened her stomach so much she forgot how to breathe again. She looked to her right side where Brittany had been sitting since they got to the hospital. She half expected to the see the gentle bob of Brittany's head as she showed Santana how to breathe for the millionth time, but she wasn't there. Santana didn't know how to breathe if Brittany didn't show her how. Tears prickled in her eyes.

"Don't you worry 'bout a thing baby doll. We're right here." Álvaro suddenly said in the door. He was wearing one of those hospitals gowns and he was hooked up to an IV that he rolled with him as his strained steps brought him closer. Gabriela was walking by his left with one boy on each arm and Carmen right behind her. Brittany scurried into the room and took her rightful place by Santana's right. There was a moment in slow motion. When this much love and family was all in one room you could feel it all around.

**~~~ April 20, 2017 ~~~**

_"Which one am I holding?" Carmen asked quietly and looked down at the tiny boy in her arms. He was sleeping but stirring and munched on his own lip contently. She giggled. She had a nephew. She had two nephews._

_"I have no idea." Brittany answered and looked down to where the other boy was sucking on her breast, hungry like a Viking._

_"Doesn't matter. He's my favorite anyways." Carmen said and stroked his hair. He didn't have that much but it was really smooth._

_"Quit hogging, will you?" Álvaro teased. "It's my turn."_

_Carmen sighed and reluctantly handed the boy over. Àlvaro's hands were twice as big as hers and it made the little one look even tinier._

_"That's it. We're moving here." He joked, but Gabriela jerked in her chair._

_"That's a marvellous idea." She said. Carmen was going here anyways to attend college, they were getting too old to have to take care of a house and they had two brand new, very convincing reasons. Santana strutted back in with her head held high and a wide smile._

_"I've called everyone." She announced. "There is no longer a single person in the city of New York who doesn't know how lucky we are." She said while moving to stand by the foot of the bed. She looked around at her family._

_"Hey, scoot together real quick." She ordered and motioned with her hands to have everyone gather around Brittany on the bed. She handed her phone to a random nurse and squeezed in next to Brittany. The nurse was a little confused at first but then lifted the phone to take a picture. It was handed back to them and Santana looked down at it with nothing but happiness in her eyes. This was the proudest she had ever been._

**~~~ . ~~~~**

Marlon slipped out of Gabriela's hand and ran over to his mommy in the bed. He tried to climb it but it was too high and his arms where too weak so he fell down on his butt. Álvaro was quick to scoop him up and place him on his knee as he sunk down in a chair.

"He-he-hey! Spiderman! Woah, you're getting heavy, little man. You must be eating your vegetables" He chirped with a sturdy hand on the boy's back and another snaking to find its way into Santana's.

"Grandpa?" Marlon whispered while doing his best to reach the old man's ear. "Is mommy okay?"

"Mommy is being very brave right now." Álvaro said seriously. "We need to be brave for her, too."

Marlon nodded and buried his face against grandpa's chest. James was still in Gabriela's hand but when he heard Álvaro's words he nodded. He wanted to be brave too.

"Daddy, you're here…" Santana murmured with tears in her eyes. It was almost surreal seeing him up and about and looking like he wasn't tired or sick.

"Don't tell the nurses, okay?" He joked and chuckled to himself.

"What about your heart?" Santana whispered carefully. She wasn't sure she wanted to know.

"This old thing?" He joked again and looked down to the left side of his chest. He let go of Santana's hand to caress her tummy, his arm draped over Marlon's shoulder and he locked his gaze firmly in Santana's eyes. "It hasn't forgotten who it's beating for."

"Santana, I need you to push." Karen said loudly and Santana remembered where she was and what she was doing. She tore her eyes away from Álvaro and looked down at her huge belly. She waited for the next contraction to come and still she wasn't prepared when it did. She cringed and panicked because her boys weren't supposed to see her like this.

"Okay, ice cream for everyone whose name starts with J or M!" Carmen announced loudly and gestured for the boys to follow her. It took a while for them to think what their names were and if they started with the letters she said, but they really wanted ice cream. Few things were as awesome as ice cream in the morning. Santana loved Carmen for knowing what she wanted and taking charge. When they were gone Santana could pay real attention to Karen. Brittany wrapped both her hands around Santana's.

"I'm right here." Brittany let her know just because it was true. Santana pursed her lips and attempted a push.

"That's not a real push, Santana" Karen complained. "Come on."

I'll show you a real push, bitch. Santana thought, and threw her whole body in to it. And goddammit she regretted it because it hurt like fucking hell.

"Fu-uck" Santana breathed, trying to catch her breath from sticking with the first push as long as she possibly could. How in the world was she supposed to get a baby out of there? Obviously, she did not think this through!

"Push, Santana, push!" Karen repeated sternly. Santana didn't like Karen's voice. She wasn't the one doing this so she should've just been quiet! It really, really hurt and Santana didn't want to anymore.

"It's okay, sweetie. You can do it! Push." Brittany cooed encouragingly by her side. It helped. If Brittany said she could do it, then she could. She prepared herself again. With knuckles turning white over Brittany's and Álvaro's hands; Santana gave it all she had again.

"Fuuuuuuuck!" Santana screamed. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"I think I know our baby's first word." Brittany joked amorously with a little giggle before kissing the side of Santana's damp face.

"It's not funny." Santana protested, but she couldn't help but laugh and it made the next push a whole lot easier.

"I see a head." Karen informed them.

"You're doing great, mija." Àlvaro breathed. He was looking intensely at Santana's face and watched every time it scrunched or twitched in pain.

"I'm so proud of you." Brittany murmured closer to her ear and Santana felt those soft lips press against her moist skin time after time.

"Don't forget to breathe." Brittany added because Santana's face was almost turning purple from all the pushing. Santana let herself take a little break and shallow breaths started hurrying in and out of her lungs again.

"I need more pushing." Karen persisted on and now Santana thought she really did hate Karen. She was so fucking annoying! Santana gave herself a few more seconds break just to be rebel and then gave in to Karen's demands. She screamed until her throat hurt, and even after she thought her voice was gone forever: she screamed some more. God, wasn't it over soon?

"Just a little while longer." Brittany encouraged like she could read Santana's mind.

"I don't want to." Santana whined and shook her head. Tears were already streaming down her face, mixing with the sweat and making every inch of her skin wet, but now sobs where on the verge of breaking her voice.

"I know, honey, I know." Brittany cooed comfortingly and nodded. She rubbed Santana's arm and stroked her cheek. "But you need to do it. For her."

Santana didn't answer. She focused everything she had on pushing. The pain was the worst she had ever felt. It was almost surreal to actually feel something like that. She wanted to stop but Brittany's gentle voice was ringing in her mind. For her. For her. For her. If this wasn't enough she would go through ten times worse for their baby girl. For the boys too. And for Brittany. She would do anything for them.

"Sweetie, look at me." Brittany mumbled in Santana's ear and guided the Latina's face away from anything and everything that could be distracting. There were a few nurses moving around the room, there was a buzzing murmur from their voices and movements, and even the traffic outside seemed louder. So much was happening and it was overwhelming. Santana thought she might faint. Things were even getting blurry.

"Santana, push!" Karen's voice encouraged once again.

"You're almost there honey." Brittany said lovingly, staring into Santana's water filled, dark orbs and stroking her thumb over a sweaty cheek. She pressed her lips against Santana's and felt Santana cry into the kiss. Santana pushed and pushed and pushed and thing were really getting dark. Then something brought her back. Something that could cut through glass. A cry.

It was heartbreaking little shrieks and Santana needed them to stop. She opened her eyes and saw Brittany standing with a gooey, naked, screaming little girl in her arms. Santana smiled lazily and relaxed to rest her back against the bed again. She was truly exhausted and yet she had to remind herself that she could stop finally pushing.

Brittany was rocking and shushing the little girl but she wouldn't stop screaming. They cut the chord and brought her away to clean her up. Santana could still hear her screeches. She started crying again too. She felt her father's large hand hug the back of her head and hold her gently, rubbing a thick thumb up and down her sweaty neck. Gabriela smiled proudly at her, wiping under her eyes with a drenched handkerchief. Santana felt better, but she wasn't the one who needed comforting.

The newly washed baby was wrapped up in a pale pink blanket and handed back to Brittany, who was also crying but silently and with a ridiculously enormous grin covering most of her face.

"She's beautiful, Santana." Brittany beamed. "She looks just like you." It was true. She did. The first, and most striking thing, was the hair. It was dark just like Santana's and so long for a new born. Santana had a lot hair too when she was born. Brittany had seen it in all the cute baby pictures of her.

Then there was the nose. It was a mini-baby-buttonier version of Santana's nose, but it was the same. Their lips were even more clearly related, so full and plump and attention stealing. Her little face was all scrunched up from crying and really, all babies have round cheeks, but Brittany could have sworn they had the same shape Santana's did. They even had the same ears.

The little girl's tiny fist jerked and slammed against Brittany's chest. Brittany felt the smooth skin of the thin arm and waved it up and down at Santana who laughed through her tears at being greeted by her daughter. When Brittany was tucking the arm back into the bundle of blankets she noticed something on her baby's elbow. A birthmark. Just like one Gabriela has. Just like the one Carmen has. This girl was a Lopez for sure. Brittany had to laugh a little but in return she got nothing but persistent sobs and violent shrieks. Santana loved seeing her baby girl in her wife's arms but the crying was getting too agonizing to bear.

"Make her stop, Brittany." Santana begged helplessly. Brittany looked up at Santana and gave her a crooked smile.

"I think she just wants her mama." Brittany cooed. She had been selfish enough; clinging to this beautiful creation for so long. It was Santana's turn to finally get to hold the perfect person she had made. Santana reached her arms out. She was aching to feel the little one's warmth against her. The bundle was so small and no heavier than a feather.

Santana cradled her and gently rocked her from side to side, but the baby refused to stop crying. It hurt Santana's ears and it really, really hurt her heart. She didn't know what to do so she started singing. Words were difficult to form so it was more like humming but it was enough. Brittana's violent sobs calmed down. Her face was still crinkled in a baby frown but within seconds she had gone completely quiet.

She was so tiny and looking down at her; Santana was awestruck. She forgot to sing for just a moment and Brittana threatened to start weeping again so Santana quickly, and through a little chuckle, sang the same tune from the top and then over and over. Brittany watched them with a smile. She sat on the bed with Santana and put her arm around her wife. They looked down at their small miracle. Her face had relaxed and smoothed somewhat now and you could note a very distinct slope of her eyes. Santana and Brittany both recognized it more than either dared admit.

"Hi baby." Brittany chirped and stroked her index finger over the smooth, ever so tiny hand. Brittana opened her fist and Brittany placed her finger in her palm instead. The girl automatically closed around it and held on tight. Her eyes slowly began fluttering open for the first time. Under those tiny baby eyelids were eyes Santana had only seen in one other person before. They had the same depth, the same shimmering sparkle, and they were so, so blue.

"Oh my God." Brittany breathed. Santana's breath caught in her throat but was followed by a hurried gasp. Santana looked back and forth from the new born baby in her arms to her loving wife by her side. Tears were smearing her vision, but she saw it. She couldn't miss it. No one could.

"Those are your eyes, Brittany. She has your eyes." Santana cried and held on to Brittany's gaze, demanding an explanation. Brittany wiped her cheek, smiled and cradled the little one's tiny head with her, in comparison, large hand.

"Is that even possible?" Santana whispered, now looking at the tiny bundle of love in her arms. She felt a tear drip off her chin and it made a dark circle on the pale pink baby blanket. Then she felt Brittany press her lips hard against Santana's temple and hold on for so long it almost hurt.

"I love you, Santana. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else in this world. All I know is because of that… I think anything's possible."

* * *

><p><strong>THE END<strong>

* * *

><p><em>This has honestly been one of the most amazing experiences of my life. You've all been amazing! I didn't even know there were this many amazing people out there. I really appreciate every alert, every fave, every review and every single read. You guys have given me so much. From lack of more creativity; from the bottom of my heart – Thank You!<em>

**Love,**

**Mollie**


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